


A Court of Hearts and Darkness

by sarah_bae_maas



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: F/M, Future Fic, Multi, Post-War, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2018-08-04
Packaged: 2018-08-29 00:09:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 33
Words: 212,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8468305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarah_bae_maas/pseuds/sarah_bae_maas
Summary: It’s been over a century since the epic and bloody war against Hybern, but a new, unprecedented horror lies in wait to threaten everything the Inner Circle holds dear.  At a mere 17, it seems that the only one who can save them is the Heir to the Night Court, Feyre and Rhysand’s daughter Eleana, but as a creature so vile promises to kill everyone she loves, she must combat the urge to succumb to the darkness herself. The key to success lies hidden within her mate, the bastard born Kaden, who is as oblivious to the bond as her Court is oblivious to the war on the horizon. With the help of her cousin and warrior Felix, the son of the famed Nesta and Cassian, they will try to save everything they hold dear, hopefully before the darkness takes them all.PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS WAS WRITTEN BEFORE THE RELEASE OF A COURT OF WINGS AND RUIN, AND DOES NOT CORRELATE IN ALL WAYS. PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND :)





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Originally based of Feysand baby headcanons from my tumblr sarah-bae-maas :)

Eleana thought that after seven years of gruelling training that she would be used to the pain her muscles felt. She had been training in this Illyrian camp since she was ten years old, and every day since she has worked as hard as possible, causing the aching and stiffness in her body. She was grateful for her training, not only was she strong and fit, but the lithe way of her body never went unnoticed either. Especially by all the males at this camp.

She supposed it might just take a long time for her to get used to the pain. Her father, the High Lord of the Night Court, and his pseudo brothers and her uncles Cassian and Azriel never seemed to feel any pain after training. Neither did her mother or Aunts Mor, Nesta and Elain. They all seemed older than the cauldron itself to Eleana.

Putting the pain to the back of her mind, she trudged back to the cabin she lived in with her mother. Eleana closed her eyes, she knew the way around this camp like the back of her hand and she needed the darkness and quiet to relax. With her wings tucked in tight, she took the instinctual journey back to her home. It didn’t matter the weather, like now where it was hours away from raining, or where she was in the camp, she could find her way home in the darkness anywhere. Her father told her it was her special little talent, and just another way of her manipulating the dark. She thought it was just good memory.

She hated to admit to herself how much she missed her father, or High Lord Rhysand as everyone around her said. Everyone she knew either talked about him as clinically as a general would talk about a war or they would hero worship him because of his famous defeat of the King of Hybern nearly a century ago. Her mother Feyre missed him so much that sometimes she suffocated the room with it and Eleana would have to make some piss poor excuse to get out of the house.

Her father would visit as often as he could, she had no doubt that he missed them as much as they missed him, but it was nothing compared to if they were actually all together like they were when they lived in Velaris.

Eleana was a mixture of both her parents, but she liked to think that she was especially like her father. He was so kind and generous toward everybody that he met, not to mention brave and courageous when it came to a fight- the exact equal to his mate. She wishes that one day she can be as strong as him and her mother; they are quite an expectation to live up to.

“Are you alright, miss?” A startled and unfamiliar voice said from beside her.

Eleana opened her eyes and mouth to shoo away the stranger but stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the most beautiful male she’d ever encountered.

His skin was the richest gold, matching the shock of blonde hair he had. She’d only seen a handful of Illyrians with blonde hair, and all had been exceptionally attractive, but none compared to the male before her. His eyes were the deepest black she had ever seen, she couldn’t even differentiate between his pupil and his iris. What skin she could see despite his clothes were covered in scars of various sizes, perhaps the largest one tracing across his bicep. He also had a very thin scar from his left eye angling across his cheek, ending at his sharp jaw line, but it was so faint that you wouldn’t notice it if you weren’t looking so intently at his features. Eleana guessed that there were a lot of females, and even males, that looked at him the way she was now.

“Um…” Eleana had never had trouble talking to boys before, _never_. Not that she would ever let her parents know that.

He had a small but confused and concerned smile on his face, showing her that he had dimples on his cheeks. “I was just wondering because it’s not often that you see a woman like yourself wandering around with their eyes closed- or any woman or person at all really.” His voice was deep and as smooth as honey, and Eleana could listen to him talk all day.

“A woman like myself?” Eleana flashed him her best, and admittedly most attractive, grin.

His eyes sparkled as they took in her smile and the rest of her. The dark blue hair that was almost black, the purplish eyes, the tan skin, and finally they raked up and down her body taking in the obvious curves. She knew that she looked older than her seventeen years, maybe the same twenty something as the male in front of her.

“I guess I’m just surprised you don’t have a throng of people vying for your attention. It surprises me that you’re alone.” He was definitely flirting with her. The smile now on his face was more seductive than the concerned one he wore before, and he had taken a slight step towards her.

“I don’t need a man,” She stepped towards him while winking, only a few feet in between them now.

“I can see that-”

“ _KADEN_!”

He flinched at the interruption, and Eleana just rolled her eyes. Of course her obnoxious cousin came to find her now.

Felix was the oldest of her cousins. He was 24 and the mirror image of his father Cassian. He was tall and wild looking, with dark hair and brown eyes. Eleana rather liked him when he wasn’t interrupting her, but it just so happened that he interrupted her _all the fucking time_.

“What do you want, Felix?” She huffed. He strolled up to them, splashing mud as he did so. Unfortunately for the blonde male in front of her, he got dirt flicked all over the front of his flying leathers.

She hadn’t really noticed them until now, only that he was wearing them, but now she could see that they were very old and tattered, ripped in places they shouldn’t be and not to mention it looked as though they couldn’t protect against anything, let alone the sharp winds of the mountain or cauldron forbid a weapon.

“I didn’t come here for you princess, I need him.” Felix said. The one thing you could count on Felix for was his utter and unnecessary cheerfulness. He was more than deadly on a battle field, and as cunning as a fox, but you would never guess it from his upbeat, positive nature. The only sign of the killing power he possessed besides his obvious physical attributes were the five siphons adorning his body. There was even talk that he may need to receive more the older he became if there was to be any chance of him containing his overwhelming power.

Felix walked to, _was it Kaden?_ Eleana thinks that’s the name she heard Felix call him. They clapped each other’s shoulders and grinned at one another. They are friends then. Interesting.

“I need you to come help me oversee the female aerial unit. Hard work, I know, but someone has to do it.” You could tell from both their grins that neither found training or ‘overseeing’ (more like ogling) the female flying units overly difficult.

“You could come if you like, Eleana.” The tone Felix used showed that in fact no, Eleana could not come if she liked. Not that he could stop her if she did want to. His father may be training him as a general and he may already lead squadrons of his own, but she was still technically his superior, a position she had been abusing since they both realised it.

At the name Eleana, Kaden’s eyes widened and darted back and forth between the two cousins. It was almost as if he knew the name was familiar, but couldn’t quite place where he had heard it before.

“How do you two know each other?” Felix asked, oblivious to Kaden.

“We’re new friends,” Eleana replied, stepping next to Kaden and resting a hand on the shoulder Felix wasn’t touching. His very broad, very muscled shoulder. Kaden couldn’t help but grin at her and rest a hand on top of hers.

Oh, Eleana liked this game very much.

Felix, who was standing to them closer than he now wanted to be, rolled his eyes and snorted at their dallying.

“Oh please,” Felix scoffed. “Don’t let her fool you, Kaden. She eats men alive and spits them out once she’s done. Such ugly manners from the Heir to the Night Court.”

Kaden visibly paled at Felix’s words, and soundlessly stepped away from Eleana and Felix so that neither was touching him. “Heir? You’re High Lord Rhysand’s and High Lady Feyre’s daughter?”

“Yes, I live here with my mother. I was on the way home when you interrupted me, not that I mind at all.” Eleana was still grinning at him, but he now only had a polite, formal smile for her.

“Felix, would you mind giving me and Eleana a moment alone?” Felix raised an eye brow at Kaden’s request, but nonetheless made his way to down the path leading to the mountain stationing the aerial units, muttering for Kaden to come find him when he was finished.

Kaden watched Felix leave and once he was out of hearing range turned to talk to Eleana.

“Where are you from?” She queried before he could say anything, “I know most people in this camp and I’ve never seen you before, I would remember if I had.” She gave his toned body an appreciative look.

“I moved here a month ago, Lady Eleana, and have been training with Felix since.” He used a voice she often heard males use when they talked to her Uncle Cassian or Uncle Azriel. It was a vast turnaround from the flirtatious way he was talking mere minutes ago.

“Are you living with Felix? It’s about time someone put that bastard in his place.” She joked.

Kaden visibly cringed away at her sentence, taking another step away from her. Pink bloomed across his cheeks and she could see that it extended down his neck and past the collar of his leathers to his chest.

“No, Lady Eleana, I live in the tents with the other… undesired.”

Eleana inwardly groaned at her idiocy. She should have known looking at his leathers that he was not a… high standing member of the community. Not that she cared at all. Some of the best people she knew had been born out of wedlock, and she would never, _never_ care about someone’s parentage. No wonder Kaden had reacted the way he had when he heard she was Heir to the Night Court, and _fuck_ she can’t believe she just called Felix a bastard when it was now obvious Kaden had lived with that stigma probably his whole life. She knew from her Uncles Cassian and Azriel’s histories that being a bastard meant that you were usually treated cruelly and indecently by nobility, something she actively made sure she never did.

“Kaden-”

“I’m sorry about my behaviour, Lady Eleana. I had no right to be so forward with you and I sincerely apologize. I-I usually don’t have the audacity to do such things, but spending so much time in this camp,” with Felix, she knew he meant, “seems to have given me looser morals and blurred my understanding of my place here.”

“You don’t need to call me Lady Eleana, barely anybody does.” It was the only reply she could think of. She disagreed with everything he said, he had only been as flirtatious with her as she had with him and it’s not like she didn’t want the attention from him. _Cauldron_ , he was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, and with every word he spoke he became more and more fascinating to her.

“They should show you more respect,” as said it, he realised that he was looking her directly in the eyes, and deeming himself unworthy, bowed his head respectfully so he was now looking at ground rather than at her. “I should go find Felix before he starts rutting on the female warriors, if you’ll excuse me Lady Eleana.”

Before she could answer him, he spun on his heels and walked away. She saw his shoulders sag and him run his hands through his hair. It was like she could feel how flustered and embarrassed he was.

She would feel awful if he spent the rest of his day and mother knows how long else feeling like that. He was already quite a ways away, his strides long and determined. Eleana thought she might melt in a puddle about how tall he was, nearly a foot taller than her.

Without really thinking about what she was doing, she winnowed so that she was standing directly in front of him, her hands braced on his chest.

He stopped abruptly and steadied himself from the sudden impact by grabbing her waist. She beamed at him and as his eyes met hers in question it was like a bolt of lightning shot through her.

She gasped in surprise, only making him become more concerned.

“Lady Eleana? Is everything okay?”

No, she wanted to reply, because it was obvious she knew something that he did not.

_You’re my mate you’re my mate you’re my mate_


	2. Chapter 2

Eleana had no idea what to do.

It wasn’t as easy as simply telling Kaden that he was her mate, she had no idea how he would react to the news. She had only known this golden boy for minutes and already she could tell that every decision that had ever been made for him hadn’t been his. What if he didn’t want a mate? It was rare that something like that happened but it _had_ happened.

Did _she_ want a mate?

The answer was obvious, of course.

Eleana had prayed to the cauldron every day as a child that she would find the kind of love that her parents had. She was somewhat of a hopeless romantic, and she blames this entirely on the romance novels she’s read over the years and the fact that she has always been surrounded by loving relationships, whether it was her parents overwhelming love or the quiet yet potent love that her Uncle Azriel and Aunty Mor shared.

She wanted that, and she knew that if this male was her mate then she could have that with him.

And she _knew_ he was. It sang through every fibre of her being that the Illyrian in front her of was everything that she dreamed of, every wish come true, every hope incarnate.

“Lady Eleana, do you want me to take you home?” He was still holding her, and she was still baffled into pure silence. “If you need me to escort you somewhere I would be more than happy, milady.”

At that she broke their eye contact, as confused as she was sure he was as well.

At that, he seemed to finally realise that he was still holding her and let her go.

She felt cold where he had touched her, it was like his hands had left ice prints behind, and she was still struggling to come up with words.

“I- um,” was all she could say. She stuttered it over and over again and his worry became more palpable.

 _Cauldron_ , she was a woman he had just met and his concern showed such kindness in him, such tenderness.

Eleana felt the overwhelming desire to touch him, not in a sensual sense, but just to be closer to him.

“Could you take me home?” She finally whispered.

 _I’m going into shock,_ she thought, _that’s what this is._

“Can you walk?” He was speaking as soothingly as he could, as if she were a feral animal that he needed to care for.

She tried to move her stiff legs, but they seemed to be as heavy as stone. “I don’t think so,” Her voice was so quiet she was surprised her could hear her. She could see that her whole body had paled, and when she shivered it wasn’t because of the bitter weather.

Without second guessing himself, Kaden swept her up in his arms, holding her legs in one and wrapping his other around her torso.

“I think I know where the High Lady’s cottage is, are you happy for me to take you there? I might need a nudge in the right direction.” He was smiling at her now, still trying to calm her down.

She decided that his smile was her favourite thing about him.

He started walking before she could answer his question, when it quickly became evident that she could not go home.

Mainly this was because she could by no means face her mother while she was in this state. It would lead to endless – loving, but endless all the same – questions about what was the matter. It wouldn’t surprise her if her father then dropped everything to come make sure she was okay as well and although on any other day she would appreciate the support she was not ready to tell either of her parents about her discovery.

She was shaking head to toe, Kaden’s grip on her was tight and steady as a consequence, and without really thinking about it she nestled into him, stealing his warmth.

“Do you know where Felix lives?”

He nodded.

“Could you please take me there?”

He changed the direction he was walking towards the other side of the camp. Felix’s cabin was rather far away, and Eleana was thinking maybe she should tell him to leave her and go find her cousin when he spread his wings and shot into the air.

She let out a surprised but delighted shriek as they cleaved through the air. Flying like this, it would only take minutes for them to get to Felix’s.

Kaden’s wings were magnificent. They were black with gold weaving through them, and large enough that Eleana wondered about the size of other things. She was tempted to touch them, but knew that it would be a major overstepping of boundaries.

The way that Kaden became radiant in the air showed Eleana that he must love flying as much as she did.

Flying was Eleana’s absolute favourite thing to do, and she thanked the Mother every day that she had been given the gift of wings. When she was a toddler and just learning how to use her wings, her and her father would practise for hours upon hours until she would fall asleep in his arms and he would have to carry her home. When she was even younger, less than a year old and barely able to fly, her father would stand at one side of the room and one of her uncles at the other, and they would let her glide between them, catching her and giving her treats and kisses, only for her to flap her little wings and try to get back to the other one again.

They flew high over the cabins of the camp, the wind racing around them. Eleana could tell from the chill in the air and the encroaching darkness that there would be a storm tonight, a big one. Another thing that Eleana loved. Kaden’s smile, a genuine, happy one this time, grew at her excitement, and shook out his hair in the wind.

“Your ears!” Eleana exclaimed.

His hair was long enough so that when they were on the ground she could not see any peculiarities about them, but now that his hair was whipping around his face she could see that they were pointed like hers.

So one of his parents was a High Fae then.

He laughed lightly at her surprise and she could feel his chest rumbling as he held her. Before she knew it he was quickly but steadily landing them in the court yard in front of Felix’s house.

Felix’s house was as unexpected as Kaden’s ears.

Because of, and Eleana hated to admit it, his brilliant leadership skills and power Felix very quickly climbed ranks and earned himself a rather large house because of it. Single storey, but with multiple bedrooms and bathrooms, Felix had decided that the generic brown bricks they used to build it were rather drab, and with the help of Eleana’s mother, painted the whole exterior a bright obnoxious yellow. Why he chose yellow she had no idea, but Felix loved it. And not only did he have a yellow house but their aunt Elain had helped him plant a vegetable garden that wrapped around the veranda. The blue veranda. The garden was infused with Elain’s magic, so it grew and prospered no matter the weather. That was perhaps Felix’s favourite part. He often picked the fruit and made small treats to give to his friends and family, as well as gift to his best soldiers. The soldiers pretended that they didn’t care about Felix’s home-made baked goods, but every time he mentioned that the winner of this or the best in that got some as a prize they all worked noticeably better and harder and got a hell of a lot more competitive with each other.

Kaden stood Eleana upright but kept one hand braced on her shoulder and one on her waist, lest she fall.

“Thank you, Kaden.” Eleana expressed, and she genuinely meant it. Even if this male wasn’t her mate, she was sure that she would want to spend more time with him anyway.

It was a little known fact due to her subtlety, but Eleana had been with a few men over the past few years, never a real relationship, just dalliances. Her first was when she was fifteen and her body started changing in a way that made her attracted to basically any male that was attractive and polite. Of course she didn’t just sleep with anyone, only a select few, and it was always very secretive.

Kaden was the kind of male she wouldn’t be ashamed to introduce to her father.

Kaden was also the kind of male her male relatives wouldn’t lynch for touching her.

Her Aunt Amren would probably hurt him in unspeakable ways, but that’s just who Amren is as a person and it doesn’t reflect on Kaden at all really.

“Will that be all, Lady Eleana?” Kaden was still gazing at her with those depthless onyx eyes, and it snapped Eleana back to reality. She didn’t know why she was thinking of all these things when she didn’t even know if Kaden was interested in her.

For fuck’s sake what person would be attracted to someone they had to fly across an Illyrian camp because they went into shock.

“Would you like to come to in?” She questioned hastily.

His smile – _his smile_ – dimmed slightly.

“I don’t think I can today, Milady, but perhaps another time.” He responded.

His hands slid down her arms, calluses tickling her slightly, to rest at his side.

He then walked up the three steps to the front door (the _purple_ front door) of Felix’s home and opened it for her.

Grateful, she walked until she was beside him.

“Are you sure? I think I see some of Felix’s fruit tarts on his bench. You’re welcome to have some.”

Kaden raised his eyebrows and peered into the house to see that there were indeed fruit tarts on the kitchen counter. “I guess I can come in for a few moments.” He agreed.

 

_______

 

 

Eleana hadn’t quite gotten over her shock, she was still slightly shaking and it was evident as soon as Kaden passed her a cup of tea he had made and some spilled over the top and onto her lap.

“I will confess, Lady Eleana, I am rather worried. What happened? I would feel much more comfortable if you had a healer, or even a friend, here with you. It would take me less than a minute to summon either.” He sat down next to her on the couch and handed her a handkerchief to wipe up the tea she spilt.

“Did you not hear me tell Felix before? You are my friend now, Kaden.”

He snorted at her words but conceded.

“Well what would a friend normally do in this situation, because I am more than lost on how to help you.” Eleana could tell he meant it, the wanting to help her.

It just kept hitting her how considerate and attentive he was being even though he barely knew her. Maybe that was the bond working for him? But what was more probable was that he was simply a nice person, with good intentions. Not like Eleana, who observing the way the muscles in his arms moved as he fussed for her, had to keep dragging her thoughts out of the gutter.

“Tell me a story - your story. Distract me.”

He said he would, but before he did he scrounged up a blanket to wrap her in, in an effort to stop her shakes.

“I’m twenty years old-”

“Really? You seem older.” Eleana interrupted.

He laughed in return, some of the spark from earlier returning to his features. “I feel older. I feel… heavier than my twenty years.” He bent his knees so that he was sitting cross-legged on the couch, and spread out his wings in a more comfortable position. “I was born to a Lord in a camp across the Steppes. My mother was a High Fae who reigned from Hewn City-”

“What.” Eleana couldn’t help but register her shock at his words. At least that explains who he inherited his fae ears from.

“That’s how most faeries react when I tell them. My parents met on Starfall when the monsters under that mountain came out to enjoy the spectacle. My father happened to be patrolling that night and he and his squadron decided to join in the festivities. It was a one night thing, what my mother and father had. Or at least that’s what he told me, I can’t remember a thing about my mother, all I know is that she must have had _amazing_ hair.” He snickered and lightly bumped Eleana with his shoulder to let her know he was joking.

“So after you were born you went to live with him?”

“Yep. From what I can gather I was still a suckling when my mother gave me to him and refused to see me again. I was raised by him with my brothers.” His voice caught on the words brothers, showing Eleana that there was much more to _that_ story. “I came to live here last month when things became… strenuous between us. I was here for a day when Felix noticed me and ordered me to join his legion and report to him the next morning before dawn.”

“You must have impressed him.” Eleana herself was impressed. The men that Felix led were the strongest and most up and coming soldiers they had. For Felix to want him after seeing him training for only a day was nothing short of a feat.

“At first I thought he was either joking or trying to seduce me. He brought me to this utterly ridiculous yellow house before the sun had even risen and sat me down with tea and raison biscuits to tell me his expectations of me and what I would have to do to earn my place here. He was just being a nice lad, but it was so different from everything I had ever seen that it threw me a bit. His ways of promoting loyalty are unconventional but undoubtedly effective. I have never seen a group of people so devoted to their leader before. It’s nice, actually.”  

“I hope you like it here,” Eleana expressed, “Illyrian camps can be brutal but I like to think that if you surround yourself with the right people then they can at least be bearable, enjoyable even. I give Felix a lot of shit but he’s actually my best friend, and if you stick with him then you’ll be fine. I think I would’ve hated it here if it weren’t for him.”

“Do you not like it here, Lady Eleana?” He quizzed.

“It less that I don’t like it and more that I love my home, Velaris. Growing up there with the kind of family I have is a child’s dream come true. See those figurines?” Eleana pointed to a set of wooden dragons that Felix kept on a stool near his fireplace. “My Uncle Azriel-”

“The shadowsinger?” This time it was Kaden’s turn to interrupt.

“Yes, the shadowsinger. He made them for Felix when he was a babe. For me he made a butterfly wind chime that sings in the best wind, so I know when the best time to go flying is. My Uncle Cassian taught me how to fight so that I never had to rely on my magic. My Aunt Nesta loves me as fiercely as she loves her own children, my Aunt Elain the exact same. Even my Uncle Lucien, who has always been at odds with my father, has loved and supported me unconditionally. My Aunt Mor taught me how to dance, a skill that despite my best efforts is something I am honestly terrible at. My father,” Eleana paused, “My father is the best man I know, and best father anyone could hope for. When my parents decided to have me follow the path Felix did and train in an Illyrian camp it wasn’t possible for both the High Lady and High Lord to leave Velaris, so they compromised and that is why I live with only my mother. I don’t see him nearly as much as I wish I could, and I miss him dearly. I grew up chasing a rainbow only to be stuck in this colourless place once I turned ten.”

Tears lined her eyes at the thought of how much she missed her family.

Kaden, seeing her tears, gingerly entwined their fingers and held her hand. “I’m sorry, milady.” he said.

“Kaden?”

“Yes, Lady Eleana?”

“Please stop referring to me so formally. I wasn’t kidding when I said I want to be your friend. That is if you’ll have me despite being a tad more than strange.” She giggled lightly.

Eleana missed the way his eyes sparkled at hearing such a lovely sound, and little did she know he was as entranced by her as she was by him.

“I guess I can manage that La- I guess I can manage that _Eleana_.”

She took a sip of her tea and rested it on the table in front of her. When she turned to him she was startled by how close they were sitting together. Arms touching, faces only inches from each other.

Kaden realised this to, his expression changing into something unreadable.

As she leaned up, he leant down, and when their lips were nothing but a breath away from each other-

“What are you two doing in my house?”

The two Fae-Illyrians sprang apart at the voice of Felix, who was standing arms crossed, eyebrows raised, drenched in rain and leaning on the frame of his front door.

Both stared at him in horror and didn’t say a word.

 

______

 

 

“Felix, please, you can’t tell anyone,” Eleana was sobbing at this point.

After Felix had caught her and Kaden in his house and they had explained why he was there, Felix had kicked him out on the grounds that when he told him to come meet him to help oversee the aerial units he wasn’t kidding. They had actual, serious business to intend to that Felix wanted to include him in because he saw how much potential he had.

If Kaden had ignored an order like that from any other superior he would have gotten at least a lashing.

Felix let him off with a warning, and said that he if got distracted by a female again to the point where he was missing duty, then Felix would have no guilt introducing his whip to Kaden’s back.

When Kaden left, thoroughly embarrassed and teeming with shame, the tears that had been building in Eleana’s eyes finally spilled over.

She confessed everything to Felix, him being her mate, him not realising, everything.

He had silently listened to her explain and now felt nothing but pity towards his young cousin.

That’s where they were now.

“Felix I’m begging you. I’m not ready to talk to anybody about this, and if mother and father find out from anyone besides me I’m fucked. And he is too.” She cried. “I don’t know what to do,” she continued, “I don’t want to just spring it on him and have him get no say in the matter. He couldn’t refuse me- I’m the fucking heir to the Night Court. The only choice he would have is to accept me, and I don’t want him to be with me if it’s only out of obligation.”

“I’m not the one you should be talking to about this,” he finally broke his silence.

“I just told you I can’t-”

“No,” he stopped her, “I’m not taking about Feyre or Rhys. We both know who you need to talk to. I can’t give you advice on this, I don’t know shit about mates.”

“What if he’s disappointed in me? What if he tells them?” It’s what Eleana feared most. She was so young and to have found her mate already was a miracle.

Felix, who had been standing far from Eleana leaning against his kitchen counter moved so that he could sit beside her. Rather than occupying the space Kaden had, he opted to sit on the carpeted floor.

“When I was your age,” he admitted solemnly, “I thought that I got a girl pregnant.”

Eleana’s eyes widened in surprise- this was something she didn’t know.

“All the signs were there- she hadn’t bled in months, she was sickly. I had no love for her in my heart- I had had only a lust that lasted a few weeks, if that. But I would have married her. I would have married her so that my child didn’t have to be a bastard. I was so, so scared, and I told him what I was going to do and he talked me out of it. He told me everything that would happen if I had a child separate from marriage and convinced me that there would be a way around the hardships. To this day he has never told father or mother what I confessed to him, and that was seven years ago.”

“Where is the child?” Eleana was almost afraid to ask.

“It was a false alarm- there was no child.”

“I’m sorry, Felix.” She said.

“It was for the best. I could barely take care of myself let alone a baby. Not to mention my mother would’ve killed me.” Some of his mischievousness returned at the mention of his mother.

“How is Nesta?” Eleana pondered. She had seen Cassian last week but it had been months since Nesta.

“They’re still trying for another baby, so I’m still avoiding them at all costs. Sometimes I long for the days when I didn’t have to put up with them being disgustingly in love with each other, and envy that you do have that.” He chimed.

Eleana laughed, her tears slowing and her breath returning to a normal speed.

“And Quathryn?” Eleana said, referring to Felix’s five year old sister.

Felix’s face fell slightly, and Eleana knew him well enough that to know that she had hit a sore spot for him. A sombre feeling wove itself through the air at her question.

“I spend as much time with her as I can.” He left it there, but it was obvious there was a lot more to say. Eleana made a mental note that once she had dealt with her shit she was going to tackle his.

“Do you think if I left now I could talk to him and make it back by morning?” She asked, trying to distract him.

“If you winnow, which is probably for the best in this wild weather. I know you’re an amazing flyer but seriously. Do. Not. Try. To. Fly. Understood? I’ll tell Feyre you’re staying with me tonight. She’ll never even know you were gone.” He ordered.

Eleana stood up and lightly kicked Felix, who was still sitting on the ground. His black hair was curling from where it had dried in the rain, and suddenly he was the chaotic boy she had grown up with.

“I don’t say this enough, Felix, but thank you.”

With that, Eleana went to go talk to the best secret-keeper in Prythian.

 

______

 

 

She didn’t listen to Felix and flew anyway, and boy was it a bad idea.

The wind bit at her face and wings, and flying was becoming increasingly difficult the more it rained and the darker it became. She also may as well have been a target for lightning.

She didn’t particularly care.

Flying gave her the space to clear her head and order her thoughts - much the same as walking with her eyes shut - which she most definitely needed to do if she was to have a rational conversation.

She had been flying for an hour when it started to hail heavily.

“Shit, shit!” She muttered to herself.

She could still try to fly, but there was no way she would reach Velaris in time to be back by morning.

Frustrated as anything, Eleana jumped through the pocket in her existence and winnowed to Velaris.

She could see the twinkling lights of the city through the down pour of water and hear sweet music in the distance. This was her home, this is where she needed to be.

She was different than her cousins. Felix was born and bred Illyrian and even though he was technically half Fae it barely showed in him. Eleana loved the Illyrian side of her family, she really did, and she may be one of the best flyers in all of Prythian, but Velaris was her home. The magic that encompassed her as a Fae is what sang true in her veins.

No siphon could control the power she held.

She was nervous again, being home, and the tears that had finally stopped itched again in her eyes. Her eyes were already puffy and red from her talk with Felix, and there was no hiding that she had not the best of days.

Either way, when she stumbled up to the house she was looking for, still sore from training but revelling in the familiar sounds and smells of her home, some of the pressure eased from her shoulders.

That was, until she barged into her Uncle Azriel and Aunt Mor’s home as if it were her own.

“Eleana? What are you doing here?” Mor was standing near the doorway and was very obviously surprised to see Eleana. Eleana didn’t blame her.

“Hi Aunt Mor, is Azriel around? I just needed to – um – speak with him about something. I, um, is he here?” Eleana was shaking again and the tears that had been threatening to resurface did.

Mor looked at her with such concern and love that it made Eleana only cry harder.

In the back of her mind she wondered if everyone turned into a blubbering mess when they found their mate, or even as unnecessarily dramatic as she was being. She can’t imagine her parents were ever like this.

“Oh child, come in from the rain.” Mor ushered her further inside the house and with a wave of her fingers the water that was soaking Eleana disappeared.

Without a word, she led her into the spacious longue, sitting her at the table that was in front of the roaring fireplace, then leaving to summon her husband.

Eleana had always loved Azriel and Mor’s house. The exterior was covered in climbing vines that during spring turned all shades of blue and green that churned and changed making their house look like the sea on a windy day. The inside was like a piece of eternal summer in the night. Bright, open and welcoming, Eleana knew that she would never be turned away from the door. The seat she was sitting on was a deep navy, matching the one across from her separated by a small table. The best part about the seat was that it didn’t accommodate for Illyrain wings, meaning it was high backed and plush and Eleana could snuggle into it. She had dismissed her wings as soon as she landed at the door, something she barely did at camp.

It was less than a minute before Azriel placed a hand on her shoulder, shaking her of her thoughts and making her turn to face him.

“Chocolate?” He asked, holding a box of chocolate covered sweets (her favourite) in his scarred hand and offering it to her.

“Yes, please.” She gingerly took the box while Azriel sat across from her.

Mor must have warned him of Eleana’s state, as he had brought hot cocoa, chocolate, and tissues to place on the small table separating them. Everything he would need to hopefully make his mess of a niece feel better.

“What is the matter, Laya?” Azriel gifted that her with that name when she was so small the only part of her she could pronounce, although it was incorrect, was ‘nyah nyah nayh.’ She would mutter it over and over again as a babe, and Azriel saw the nickname it produced as perfectly fitting for his brother’s daughter.

“If I tell you Uncle Az, I need to know you won’t tell my parents. When they find out, they need to hear it from me.”

“I am exceptionally good at keeping secrets, young Laya, _especially_ from your parents.” He teased.

Her lower lips wobbled and her face crumpled in despair.

At her expression, Azriel reached over and gripped her hands with his own, offering her comfort.

“I found my mate, Uncle Azriel.” She confessed.

He blinked, the most surprise he would allow himself to show.

“This is unexpected, but not a bad thing. What about this upsets you?” He inquired.

“I knew nearly as soon as I met him, which was only earlier today, and already he’s all I think about and I’m in disarray. He’s a member of Felix’s elite, he’s strong handsome, but more than that he’s thoughtful and compassionate. I went into a bit of a… let’s call if breakdown, after the bond snapped into place. And he took such fine care of me, even if he had no idea what was going on. Maybe that’s why I’m upset, because the bond snapped into place for me and he has no idea who I am besides Heiress to the Night Court, supposedly celibate and untouchable.” Eleana rambled.

She gripped her uncle’s hands harder.

Azriel would take the pain she was inflicting on him by squeezing his hands so tight - if that’s what she needed. His small Laya often forgot she possessed the unnatural strength of her mother, if not more.

“Have you thought of just telling him that you’re mates? Often times it clicks for one and not the other. You’re parents are the perfect example. If I’m remembering correctly Rhys knew a good six months before Feyre did, and she only found out because a suriel told her.” Azriel suggested.

“I would but… he’s a bastard.”

Azriel nodded in grim understanding.

“He didn’t think he was worthy enough to be my friend, and I’m worried that if I tell him we’re mates, or I let myself fall in love with him that he’ll only be with me out of a sense of duty or requirement. Which I know seems stupid and juvenile to say considering I’ve known him less than a day.”

“Would you like my advice, Laya?”

“Yes,” she said eagerly, “I have no idea what to do Uncle Az, I’ve never been in a position where I couldn’t think of something to do.”

“You are your own person, with or without a mate. So I suggest you be friends with him first. Show him he is worthy of love, love he has probably never received before, and build something more than just a mateship between you. Rhys’s mother, your grandmother and one of the best women to ever have graced this existence, didn’t have that with her mate. She was perfect, and still she was not happy in her relationship. She had no common ground with your grandfather, nowhere to connect except their bond. This isn’t to say that people who instantly click are always like this, Elain and Lucien certainly weren’t. But perhaps he not knowing is a blessing in disguise, for now you have the option to build up with relationship in a loving and mutual way.”

“You think I could do something like that? I’ve, and please _please_ don’t tell father, had lovers before but it was never anything serious. Fuck, I never thought I’d find a mate let alone at this age.” Eleana didn’t fret about using foul language in front of any of her relatives; they all understood it was generally the paramount way to illustrate emotion.

“Your mother was barely older than you are now when she found Rhys, even Nesta was only in her twenties when her and Cassian collided into each other. You’ll be fine, Laya. This Kaden boy seems decent, and if Felix is such fast friends with him then I’m sure he must have many positive qualities.” He assured her.

“I didn’t tell you his name, or that he was friends with Felix.” Eleana was mystified.

Azriel winked at her, and in return said, “I don’t need you to tell me.”

It became clear what he meant when his ever-present shadows danced around him, making him smirk and making Eleana wonder what they were telling him.

“How have you been sleeping?” Azriel asked out of the blue.

Eleana shouldn’t have been surprised at his question. She looked like she’s taken a tumble down a cliff with her swollen eyes and wrinkled clothes.

Unbeknownst to most, she also had a long history of insomnia and night terrors.

“It’s been over four weeks since I’ve dreamed of the Room.”

Eleana didn’t feel like dwelling on it.

“Curious,” was all Azriel said on the matter.

______

 

Azriel and Eleana spoke for most of the night, puzzling over what she could do and Azriel giving her any relationship advice he had. He also just let her talk about random things, knowing that she had many more struggles than unrequited feelings.

Azriel just hoped that Eleana wouldn’t be dragged any further into the darkness she craved so badly.


	3. Chapter 3

It wasn’t often her mother woke her up in the middle of the night because a squadron of Illyrians had been slaughtered.

It also wasn’t often that the task of investigating was delegated to anyone but the Inner Circle.

Felix and Eleana stood in the office of High Lady Feyre, the former awake and alert and the other bleary eyed and dreary.

They were waiting on two things, the arrival of the High Lord and the arrival of his General and Spy master.

They didn’t know much about what had happened; all the really knew was that a group of Illyrians that were stationed to do rotations around the north area of the mountains has disappeared only for their remains – what was left of them – to be found a day later by another squadron in a completely different place.

Their bodies revealed that the way they had been killed was nothing short of brutalisation. They had been torn limb from limb, making distinguishing each individual member impossible. The bodies had been drained of blood, the wings torn apart in unspeakable ways, and perhaps the most sickening is that no one had any idea what could have done this.

Eleana’s mother Feyre was fretting about, getting ready weapons and contacting all the appropriate people.

“Why are we here?” Eleana asked, making her mother stop what she was doing to focus on her daughter.

Feyre smiled at her child, her favourite thing in the world, and gestured for her and Felix to both take a seat.

“Cass will explain, but I’m under the impression that Felix will probably be asked to deal with this, and where Felix goes you inevitably do to. It’s just easier to wake you both now.”

Her mother approached her and pressed a sweet kiss to her forehead, and then one to Felix’s. Her mother loved Felix nearly as if her were her own son, which wasn’t uncommon for their family.

Her uncles and aunts had always, whether she liked it or not, treated her like a daughter and Felix like a son. She was sure as soon as they started having their own children they wouldn’t feel that way anymore but for now it was nice, if not a bit meddlesome at times.

Felix and Eleana both sat on the wooden bench that ran alongside the left side of the room, which didn’t last long. As soon as Cassian and Azriel walked through the door Felix jumped up and ran to his father to give him a hug. Cassian laughed, the two men perfect reflections of each other, and clapped his son on the back as he embraced him.

“Bit old for that, aren’t you?” Cassian joked as he ruffled his son’s hair.

Eleana thinks she might’ve been the only one who noticed the awkward way Felix stepped away at that, even though outwardly he was laughing.

“Laya,” Az smiled. He walked to her and gave her a swift but tight hug. “How are you?” She knew he wasn’t asking just to be polite- she could feel how worried he was about her after her little breakdown a week ago.

“I’m well,” She answered.

It wasn’t a lie. She had yet to see Kaden again, she has an inkling that he’s avoiding her, but Felix admitted to her that Kaden regularly asks about her after they’ve finished training.

She does need to think of a way to corner him and make it look like they are meeting by coincidence. However else is she supposed to get to know her mate better?

Her thoughts came to an abrupt stop as her mother let out an excited squeal.

Eleana was about to make a joke about how un-High Lady like the noise was when she realised what the source of her mother’s excitement was.

He had a leash on his power, and was wearing a glamour to hide how powerful he truly was, but this was undeniably her father.

He was currently holding her mother so tight that Feyre had been lifted off the ground. His head was buried in her neck and she was peppering kisses to his head.

It was disgustingly sweet and Eleana was tempted to gag.

Cauldron she wanted a love like that.

_You could have that with Kaden._

She dismissed the thought and approached her parents.

Rhysand - High Lord of the Night Court, the most powerful High Lord in history, death incarnate, night triumphant - teared up when he saw his little girl.

He immediately let go of his mate and pulled his daughter into the tightest hug of her life.

If Cassian and Felix were one in the same, then Rhys and Eleana were the female and male equivalents. The only thing she had inherited from her mother was her straight nose and pattering of freckles, and her vast and varied magic. Everything else was her fathers, and she wouldn’t have it any other way. He gave her a reassuring squeeze before letting her go. He kept his hands on her shoulders though, and gave her the kindest of smiles.

“As much as I want to listen to you tell me about everything that’s happened since the last time we spoke,” which was over a month ago, Eleana noted, “we need to get to business.” The High Lord ordered.

Everyone started moving around, getting into position to start debating what to do and what could’ve happened. Felix knew what was going on - the know-it-all prick - but this was somewhat new territory for Eleana. Before now she had always been too young to really have any input in meetings such as these, and it made her feel untested and nervous.

Hopefully she could live up to her parents.

 

_____

 

It had been a week since he’d seen her, and he couldn’t get her face out of his head.

Something must be wrong with him.

Her small laughs, her grins, her voice – Eleana was driving Kaden insane.

He felt ridiculous. He had known her for a week, seen her literally one time, and already he felt like a young boy with a training yard crush.

To help vent his pent up feelings, he had taken to doing extra training whenever he wasn’t training with his own group, known predominately (among other things) as the Elite. He would sword fight and combat with anyone who was willing, and luckily for him there was never a shortage of Illyrian’s searching for bloodshed.

That’s what he was doing now as the sun was starting to rise over the looming mountains, bringing the first lovely waves of heat. The air was still cold enough to cause shivers if he stood still for too long, but that wasn’t a common occurrence. Once he had finished one exercise he quickly moved onto the next.

He had woken up hours ago, barely sleeping. His makeshift bed of leaves and bush that covered the floor of his pathetic excuse for a tent (really it was a patchy piece of fabric hung between two trees) was a calling for all sorts of insects, meaning that he was constantly being bitten by Mother knows what.

It was the closest thing to a bed he had ever slept on.

Kaden was ashamed to admit he didn’t have much experience when it came to furniture – before he moved to this camp the best he’d had was a wooden stool in the office of his father – and nearly had a panic attack the first time he sat on Felix’s couch. If that is what a couch was like Kaden hoped that one day he might even be able to try a mattress – even if it’s only for a minute.

Once he heard the first clangs of steel, Kaden rose and begrudgingly put on his ragged leathers and eagerly made his way to the training yard where he saw the first squadron of the day start to train. He didn’t even have to ask to join in he had come so often. They had gotten to the point where they expected him to be there and found it odd if he wasn’t. He had started coming even before Eleana – he had needed the extra training long before he met her.

They started with a long and gruelling run, the cold air making Kaden’s lungs ache. He never felt any other pain after training. Not anymore. Not after having lived with his brothers for so long.

No, the pain that inflicted on him from practise never compared to the throttling that used to be almost an hourly occurrence.

His only salvation were the moments where he could crawl back into the room that was deemed his, and wait for the pure bliss of sleep to overtake him. With or without the chains that usually bound him this was when he was most comfortable.

When he was very young Kaden used to dream of vibrant streets, lively music, and loving chatter. He would yearn so wholly for those dreams that once they stopped he was tempted to simply end himself, might have even tried if it wasn’t for the sporadic and random images of colour that appeared to him.

He was only thirteen when the dreams stopped and the images started.

He snapped back to the present as a new opponent came to stand in front of him, sword already raised and grin on his face.

This male was new, someone Kaden hadn’t encountered before. He could tell from his snide smile and puffed chest that he thought mighty high of himself. This Illyrian was nearly two feet shorter than him and had dark, cropped hair – the complete opposite to his golden waves.

Kaden gave it a minute before he put this male on his ass.

They had both raised their swords but were interrupted by a shout of Kaden’s name.

He turned to see Felix stalking towards him, Eleana barely a foot behind.

Fuck, she was glorious.

Kaden lowered his sword as the cousins approached and even found himself smiling at the pair of them. Kaden had never smiled as much as he did since he moved to this camp, and was even grateful for the circumstances that led him here.

“Kaden,” Felix repeated, “you are one hell of a guy to track down. What are you doing here? These men are far inferior to you when it comes to skill - you’d gain nothing from training with them. Although I do appreciate the effort. Muffin?” Felix then held out a container filled with blueberry muffins, Kaden’s favourite, and offered him one.

Kaden, never letting go a good thing pass him by, took one with zealous.

“Thank you,” he said gratefully. Kaden knew that in another life where they weren’t all war mongering soldiers Felix would’ve been a baker.

“Hello, Kaden. It’s nice to see you again.” Eleana’s velveteen voice was the nearest thing to music that Kaden had ever heard.

“Hello, Eleana.”

He hadn’t seen her since their near kiss in Felix’s home, and he was glad that she was still talking him.

Every time he thought of the way he leaned into her, completely prepared to kiss her, his face flushed and he felt physical pain from the embarrassment. He just hoped that she could forgive him and they could move on. Kaden hadn’t really had friends in his twenty years but he knew that the woman in front of him could change that. Wished that she would. There was just something so disarmingly charming about her, and it made him want to talk to her for hours on end.

“What brings you so here so early in the morning? Last I saw you were stumbling home drunk with a female on your arm,” Kaden jokingly asked Felix.

Felix rolled his eyes and Eleana moved forward so that she was closer. She had a faint, amused smile on her face, highlighting her pretty freckles and remarkable eyes.

“Poor Felix I fear had to leave the woman warming his bed on the instruction of our nosy parents. Although I’m sure he was more than thrilled to be caught wooing a woman by his High Lady, he was called away for more important business.” Eleana explained, smile widening to a toothy grin.

Kaden couldn’t help but snicker at the image of Felix ‘wooing’ a woman and being caught by his aunt. At least it wasn’t his mother.

Felix rolled his eyes so hard it was a wonder his eyes didn’t pop right out of his skull. “Very funny, but I’ll have you know that she was well and truly gone by the time Feyre summoned me.”

The container that he was holding had been tucked under his arm, and at the mention of his summons he became noticeably more serious.

Kaden was tempted to make a joke about how Felix must not be able to last very long, but thought better of it as he looked at his very muscular, very large, very powerful leader.

“That’s actually why we’re here,” he continued. “I’ve been tasked to investigate a slew of butcherings the far side of the forest. I could’ve taken my entire squad with me, or as many squadrons as I liked, or just a select few.”

Kaden couldn’t help but register his surprise. “How many are dead?”

“Thirty-three,” Eleana answered for Felix.

Kaden took her in again.

The immaculate leathers, the long braided hair, the bow mouth, the sumptuous curves…

He needed to calm the fuck down and get some self-control before he begged her to touch him. What right did he have to think about her like this? _None_ , was the answer.

They were discussing a serious topic, and here he was thinking about what it would be like for her elegant hands to stroke him.

“We need to act swiftly. Neither I or other members of the Inner Circle know what could’ve done this - so I’m leaving immediately to try and find out.” Felix informed.

Kaden nodded in acknowledgment, although he didn’t really understand why Felix was telling him such sensitive information.

Eleana, seeing his confusion, stepped forward again so that she was only a foot in front of him. She had to tilt her head slightly to look him in the eyes and Kaden resisted the urge to either step back to get away from her gaze or move forward so that they could finish what they started a week ago.

“Rather than potentially hinder anything we find by having it trampled on by Illyrian buffoons, Felix decided that it would be best if he took me and his Elite who has shown the most potential during training.”

She was so close he could not just see her breath in the crisp air but feel it caressing his face.

“That’s you,” she accompanied her two words with two taps on his chest.

Kaden’s eyebrows shot up in surprise and his heart palpitated at her touch, as if the fire he knew simmered under her skin burned through him.

Rather than trying to ask numerous questions when his body was behaving this way he simply said, “When do we leave?”

 

_____

 

The forest that they stalked through was as famous as it was deadly.

As Eleana observed her surroundings, the thick trees, the dense weeds that covered the ground, she wondered how her parents had ever defeated the King of Hybern in such conditions.

They assured her that by the time they went to battle the forest had already well and truly been cleared, and even before it had been nothing like this. It had regrown with the blood of thousands as its fertiliser which is what gave the current forest its eerie atmosphere. Not far from here was one of many monuments that lay in recognition of her parents and all the sacrifices they made to save Prythian. Monuments like these, which were usually stone carvings of her parents standing hand in hand, made of black marble for her father and white for her mother, stood at every entrance to what was two centuries ago Prythian’s most sacred mountain. Nowadays, it was outlawed to even attempt to enter and go Under the Mountain.

The biggest of these monuments was in the Spring Court, built by High Lord Glaslane when he was fifty years old. The statue was not just of the High Lady and High Lord of the Night Court but of every High Lord at the time of the war. They were all facing each other in a circle, with a fountain made of gold that spurted moonlight sat in the middle. Suspicion had it that bathing in the moonlight gave the Cauldron opportunity to judge the purity of your soul.

Her Aunt Elain and Uncle Lucien, who had raised Glaslane after the unexpected death of his father Tamlin, helped him make it, forging it from the fire that burned in her uncle’s veins and the life that glowed within her aunt.

“I think I found something!” She heard Kaden shout.

They were all within 100 paces of each other, and she heard the thicket rustle as Felix also approached the voice of Kaden.

They both saw, and dismissed, the same thing once they reached Kaden.

In his scarred hands he held three arrows made of pure opal, bound by a thin chain of delicately twined black thread.

“Oh, just give that to Eleana. It means nothing.” Felix brushed aside Kaden’s find, just as Eleana had.

“But why? Don’t you think it’s a little strange that something threatening, like an arrow, has been so ornately made and left here?” Kaden inquired.

His question was valid - it was one Eleana’s parents had asked for many years when she started receiving presents from the forest.

When she first received an opal weapon it had been a knife and she could barely walk. Her parents thought that it was a threat against her life. Between them and her uncles and aunts they searched relentlessly for the origin of these beautiful weapons, but never found where they were coming from. It wasn’t until she started to receive more, daggers, arrows, even a sword, that they started hunting down traitors. It would take Az minutes to determine if they knew anything valuable, but they never did. For the next five years every time Eleana would step into the forest or any woodland someone would find an opal creation.

It wasn’t until she was six and they found a crown made of opal and sapphires that they realised that they weren’t threats from an enemy, but gifts from the forest for the Princess of the Night Court.

Since then, without fail, if she went into the forest and you looked in a nook or cranny of the woods, you would find a gift made from the rare opal.

“The life that governs this forest has been leaving them for me since the moment I was born. It has nothing to do with the slayings.” She told Kaden.

Felix had already made to continue his search leaving Kaden and Eleana to themselves.

“They leave them for you? How unusual.” Kaden rose from his crouching position, the arrows were found in the roots of a large oak tree, and gave them to her.

“I agree, it is strange. I’m grateful for everything they’ve given me though,”

He offered her a small smile, and made to continue his foraging for clues.

Eleana, rather than leaving him to his own wits, decided to take this opportunity to search with him.

They searched in a peaceful silence, although Eleana could feel the annoyance of Felix rolling off of him as they turned up nothing.

“Tell me more about this rainbow,” Kaden asked out of the blue.

Eleana was surprised he remembered her talking about it - she had said all but one sentence that mentioned it.

Eleana had no qualms telling him about Velaris – the city had been exposed during the war thanks to the King of Hybern.

“I grew up in Velaris. It’s the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen, from any court. When I was young my mother and I would spend hours upon hours in the Artists Quarter, which is known as the Rainbow of Velaris. It’s so vibrant and never will you go somewhere that isn’t filled with music. She tried to teach me how to paint but I was never all that great at it. It’s the same with dancing. First my father tried to teach me – he would stand me on his toes and show me all the movements but it nearly always ended in someone getting injured, usually him. Even my Aunt Mor tried and failed. I quite enjoy both but I guess I’m just not meant for the artistic life. So rather than join in the revelry of painting and dancing I would explore the streets until I knew every stone, every store, every faerie that lived there, and I made it my rainbow.”

“It sound’s lovely, Lady-”

“Don’t say it!” Eleana, without really thinking about it, winnowed so she was standing in front of him and covered his mouth with her hand to stop him from talking. “None of that formal bullshit here. You are my friend Kaden and I am your friend Eleana. Nothing else, okay?”

She could feel him smiling beneath her hand and matched it with her own as he brought his hand up to hold her own and remove it from his face.

“I’ll get there one day, I promise.” He assured.

He hadn’t let go of her hand yet, and Eleana opted to just entwine their fingers.

“If you two are done being gross, I actually found something and would appreciate if _you_ actually did what you came here to do.” Felix yelled from thirty paces away.

Eleana had to hold in her groan of frustration was tempted to snarl at Felix for interrupting them, but he was right. They did have an important task to do.

One might think that Kaden was chosen to come because of Eleana’s feelings towards him, but he was genuinely the best choice of Felix’s Elite.

Eleana hadn’t seen him train, except from the small amount she had seen this morning, but Felix had told her all about how strong and smart Kaden seemed to be. Not even his most talented soldiers had been able to hold their own against him after only a week of drills. Which is honestly astounding considering Felix governs soldiers who are centuries old to men in their twenties who show extreme talent in the art of war - the best of the best are led by Felix, who, which is even more astounding, was better than any other solider in the camp, maybe Prythian, by the time he was sixteen.

Kaden got on with the job, letting go of Eleana’s hand and making his way over to the petulant Felix.

“What is it?” She asked.

When they neared him, Felix gestured to a barely there trail of blood that ran along the ground – a random pattern of spattering that led further than even their fae senses could see.

“It’s blood from multiple people. I can’t distinguish from so little if it’s from our Illyrians but it’s still well worth it to follow.”

Both Kaden and Eleana nodded in agreeance.

Felix started to follow the faint trail, but was interrupted by Kaden.

“It leads to the Mountain.” He spoke.

Felix and Eleana turned to him in surprise.

“How do you know?” Felix asked hesitantly.

There was no way Kaden could tell by simply looking at the trail, and suspicion clouded over Felix.

“It is part of the magic I inherited from my mother. It has to do with being able to follow things, people, trails, animals, you name it and I can do it. It was my greatest advantage as a child and is probably the reason I wasn’t disposed of as soon as I could walk. When I see things like this… It’s like everything that has to do with following that particular path turns into a little light that illuminates whatever way I have to go to find what I’m looking for. Sometimes it’s a footprint, a broken twig, even a scent, but it brightens and I know what way I need to go. This blood?” He pointed to the dark red spattering, “It’s fresh, and if your Illyrians died days ago it makes me think that this is from a more recent hunt of the same creature that did this. What’s more worrying is that it ends smack bang at the entrance to the Mountain. Meaning it’s either still there, or it found a way to get in.”

Both were horrifying options.

If this creature, if it even was a living thing, was still here they could be in serious danger. It had killed thirty three Illyrians, and they could easily be next.

But if that creature had gotten Under the Mountain… it had been over a century since Amarantha and the King of Hybern’s respective defeats and since then no one had dared enter since the High Lord’s and Lady of Prythian had used it to execute the King of Hybern and Jurian.

“Maybe we should contact Drakon. He was the one to seal it, he would know if there was any way to get back in.” Suggested Felix.

“I don’t think that will be necessary.” Eleana responded. “The wards that cover this mountain do it in phases rather than just multiple large wards. I don’t see a problem with winnowing in if I wear them down a bit.”

“These wards are a century old and can barely be altered by a High Lord, and you think you’ll be capable of simply ‘winnowing in.’ Are you an idiot? You were raised better than this, Eleana.” Felix scoffed.

“One, I don’t appreciate the tone and technically I am your superior so shut the fuck up. Secondly, you’re forgetting that I don’t just possess the power of one court, _but all of them_. So yeah, actually. I do think I can just winnow inside. Maybe if you use some manners I’ll let you join me.” Eleana snapped back.

What was with Felix today? He’s been a moody shit all day and it was really starting to grate on her nerves. She understood the gravity of the situation, even thinking about going Under the Mountain could earn you a whipping by your High Lord, but they would never be punished for following this lead. It’s also not like the death of a squadron was the worst thing they’d ever seen.

“Alright then Princess, show me what you can do. How about we go to the entrance right now? You can winnow us all in and we can have a grand old time. We would never be punished, of course, but I’m curious as to what they would do to Kaden if they found out.”

Eleana snarled at Felix, the sound ripping through her.

“I don’t know what the hell is wrong with you today, and why your acting like a pissy two year old, but pull your cauldron-damned head in before I shove it up the arse of the closest water wraith. Quathryn has more maturity than you do right now.”

“Don’t you _dare_ mention her, Princess. You may be my superior but bring her into this again, or into anything, and I will have no regrets about putting you in your place.”

The two cousins looked at each other with pure wrath on their faces, and it was either commendable or suicidal for Kaden to step between the two.

They were both burning, the heat rolling of them in waves. Kaden knew that they were seconds away from blasting their magic at each other.

“We may not even need to go Under the Mountain, the entrance may be as far as we need to go. Eleana, I’m sure Felix is just tense because of the severity of the situation - we should be fairer on him. And Felix, I’m sure Eleana would never speak ill of Quathryn or put her in harm’s way.” Kaden placed a hand on both’s scolding shoulders. He had to resist hissing at the heat. “Let’s just follow this trail and see where it leads us.”

The cousins acquiesced and the tension in the air was instantly gone.

“I feel light-headed. I’m sorry, Felix. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.” Eleana conceded.

“It’s alright. The isn’t the first time we’ve fought, nor will it be the last.”

The cousins clasped forearms and the group persisted along the trail of blood. Felix and Eleana reared back and let Kaden do the tracking, and it became evident very quickly that he was not exaggerating his tracking abilities, maybe even understating them.

The blood became more pronounced as they came nearer to the entrance of the Mountain. The spatters became less patchy and more frequent – turning into full puddles before they knew it. They could also start to see other signs of activity, such as broken twigs and trodden grass.

With Kaden at the lead, Felix and Elena dutifully followed him.

A shadow passed over the trio, and as they collectively looked up the statue of the High Lady and High Lord loomed above them.

The statues surrounding the Mountain were all intricately detailed right down to the freckles on Feyre’s cheeks and the scars on Rhysand’s wings and the one before them was no different.

They could see the blocked entrance from here. What was once the opening to a cave that led so far back that it opened into the many stone passageways of the Mountain was now just another rock face. If not for the monument and the miniscule line where the edge of the opening once was you would never have known that it was there.

It was also clear that they were alone.

Strangely alone.

Not even the buzzing of an insect or the chirping of a bird could be heard.

“I think… I think Elena was right. I think that if we want to keep following this then we need to somehow go, um, well, into the Mountain.” Kaden stuttered.

They all looked at each other.

Thirty three Illyrians and all signs led to this being the closest to whatever had killed them.

Felix approached Eleana and grabbed her shoulders to force her attention onto him. Where her father had done something similar that morning, it had been gently and full of love. The way the Felix was doing it now was to make her focus.

“I want a yes or no answer. Do you think you can winnow us inside? If so, we can try and deal with this problem now. I know it was a lot of Illyrians that died, but I easily trump their power let alone you. And with Kaden as well? It’s just another advantage. If not, then we go home and make our parents deal with it.”

“Um, I-” She spurted,

“Yes or no, Laya.”

“Yes.” She asserted with confidence. “I can do this.”

“Then show us why you inherited the name curse-breaker.”

She broke contact with Felix so that she could lay her hands on the stone face. The surface of the Mountain was sharp and jagged, and she elicited a hiss of pain when she accidently cut her palm on one of the rough edges.

Disregarding her injury, she spread her fingers, closed her eyes, and let her darkness do the work for her.

 

_____

 

Kaden couldn’t see anything but the glowing Eleana in front of him. Her skin was radiant with a white light, and he could see patterns of flowers and vines in violet streams - the near twin to the colour of her eyes - covering her body. Everything had been swept away by the night that she was whipping around them. The trees were being blown back, there was no sight of Felix except for his shouting, and yet Kaden didn’t feel any pain.

Her darkness was warm – soft even. It felt like a delicate caress after a long day, a hot springs in the dead of winter, the feeling of a warm body next to your own. The only proper way to describe it was lovely.

Eleana’s darkness was lovely.

After a few minutes, that lovely darkness started to fade away and eventually all that was left was a clearing left sparingly battered, a groaning Felix, a luminescent Eleana and an in awe Kaden.

“How did you do that?” Kaden was dumbfounded and awestruck. He had encountered magic overtime but never had he felt anything like that.

“It’s a long story - just know that it is one of many weapons in her arsenal.” Felix answered for her. “What’s more imperative is if you can get us inside. Well, Eleana?”

The glow in her skin died down slowly, and now that Kaden wasn’t being distracted by her glow, he realised that she was trembling slightly.

“It’s all good to go. Come here and I’ll get us inside. I don’t know quite were we’ll land, but that just makes it all the more interesting.” The shake in her body wasn’t in her voice; in fact she spoke with utmost surety.

Felix walked to stand behind her, grasping her upper arm with a tight enough grip that it wouldn’t hurt her but he also wouldn’t accidently fly off if something went wrong. Kaden followed his example, clutching her other arm so that he was on her right.

She bobbed her head and without any further notice she winnowed.

Kaden had never winnowed before, and the feeling of his body turning into a shadow and moving as though time didn’t exist was an unparalleled feeling.

He could feel it, but not really feel it, as they passed through the thick stone and entered into a cavernous space. They didn’t stop there though - Eleana kept going until they were in a strange auditorium.

When she stopped, Kaden swayed with the feeling of being back on his legs and being back to a physical state. He was a bit dizzy, but it passed after a few seconds.

They had done what no human or faerie had done in one hundred years. They had gone Under the Mountain.

While they were winnowing and they were simply using the pockets of separate existences to travel, light had not been a problem. Now that they had stopped, they were in pitch black and couldn’t see a thing.

Felix and Eleana must have been on a situation like this before, because without prompting lines of fire crept from their fingers, bringing light with it.

Their fire was spectacular. Felix’s was the most vibrant shades of red and orange –matching his siphons- whereas Eleana’s was a shocking blue to green. Their fire weaved together like a vine, creating patterns of swirls and shapes that slowly lifted up to rest on the roof of the space they were in. The thin and intricate lines of fire covered the whole ceiling after nearly two minutes, exposing what was a colosseum of sorts.

It suddenly occurred to Kaden how truly staggering the power of the Night Court was.

There was a raised platform in front of them – low enough that with a single flap of their wings it was easily conquered but high enough so that they couldn’t painlessly scale it by hand or without magic.

Surrounding them in a wide dome, also at an elevated level, were rows upon rows of spectators seats.

Beneath them were deep trenches. It was clear from the splinted ground that they had once been filled with muck and mud, but now they were dry as a bone. The trenches were curious. They were dug deep into the ground but at one end to a tunnel it suddenly dropped down further so that there was another level. They were made in the shape of a twisted maze and Kaden couldn’t comprehend what this possibly could’ve been used for.

“Holy Cauldron,” Felix gasped at the sight.

Eleana was also staring wide eyed at their surroundings. “This is the Maze of the Middenguard Wyrm. This is where she slew the foul thing and where they made Jurian suffer. I had no idea they left it here. I thought it was destroyed.”

She? They must be referring to High lady Feyre, which means that this must be where she did the first trial and where Jurian was imprisoned before his execution.

“Why bother destroying it when they’re just going to seal the damn thing?” Felix mused. He took a few steps away from the others so that he could peer into the tunnels below. “This is amazing. Disgusting, but amazing.”

Kaden realised that he was still holding onto Eleana, and quickly let go.

With a flap of his mighty wings, Felix plonked down into the tunnels to start exploring.

“This is unbelievable. I always knew what my mother and father went through before and during the war but this… She was human when she killed that Wyrm. I don’t know how she – how she survived. And my father had to watch the whole time.”

Although Kaden was the only one who could hear Eleana’s mutterings, he knew they weren’t intended for him. Rather, she was trying to process the horror of being confronted with something so traumatic from her mother’s past.

She looked sad, so very sad at the thought of her mother and father having to go through something like that.

She turned so gaze to him, “Do you want to go help Felix? He’ll probably need your assistance.”

Kaden recognized the polite dismissal for what it was and left Eleana to her thoughts.

He jumped into the pits and immediately found the signs he was looking for. He summoned Felix over and within minutes they were scouring the pits for more clues as to the creature’s whereabouts, or to what it even was.

“I don’t even know what I’m looking for,” Felix confessed after crossing the same rock for the third time.

“There’s barely anything here to see.” Kaden went to kneel next to Felix, who was fruitlessly trying to track… well, nothing. “If you come over to where I was…” Kaden got up and led Felix over to the space he was standing in before, “See this here?”

“No.”

“The dirt along here,” Kaden grazed his fingers along four lines that ran along the wall. They barely appeared on the dirt surface, but with Kaden’s help Felix could see them. “This happens when something runs along the wall while they’re walking. From what I can see these are too faint and too thin to be made from fingers. So either they’re some sort of object, or more likely-”

“Claws.” Felix finished.

“They lead up into the viewing area and out of the corridor to the right. I’m optimistic that whatever we’re looking for isn’t much further away, and the quicker we deal with this the quicker we can leave this damned place.”

Felix hummed in agreement.

“Get Eleana, will you? I’ll start extending the flames to cover more area.”

At that, Felix flew to the corridor Kaden mentioned and lifted his hands to extent the net of fire. As his vines of fire went further Felix followed them down the corridor, leaving Kaden’s sight.

Kaden backtracked, finding Eleana right where he had left her.

Kaden liked to think he was an observant person, but he wouldn’t have left her alone of he knew about the gaping cut on her hand.

“ _Mother_ Eleana, when did that happen?”

“When I was breaking the wards. It’s not a big deal.” She resigned.

“May I?” He asked.

She nodded and he gently took her hand in his own to inspect the cut. It wasn’t as bad as he originally thought, and it would be easy for her immortal fae blood to heal it. However he decided to speed up the process by adding his own magic into the mix – surging through the small amount of healing power he had into her hand.

Before their eyes, the wound closed over and stitched itself back together.

“Thank you.”

He made to let go of her hand, but Eleana had other ideas. She smiled softly at him and entwined their fingers. His hand dwarfed hers, but he admitted to himself that they were rather a perfect fit.

Kaden thought Eleana must really like holding people’s hands. Why else would she do it so often?

With her other hand she stroked his hair off of his forehead. It had become mattered while studying the tunnels and had become somewhat stuck to his face – but with tenderness she brushed it away.

They were both washed in the orange and purple light of the flames, making the fire vines that encompassed the roof make twirling patterns of shadow and colour cover their bodies.

“I guess it’s my turn to say thank you,” he teased.

“No. Thank you, Kaden. For my hand but also for asking me about the rainbow.”

Kaden was surprised at her response. It hadn’t occurred to him earlier that no one talked to Eleana about her home. The vast majority of Illyrians wouldn’t care about the happenings of Velaris and Felix had enough issues of his own to deal with. Besides her family, Kaden didn’t know if Eleana had any friends either.

To his utter disbelief and shock, Eleana stood on the tips of her toes and pressed a featherlike kiss to his cheek.

“My Aunt Elain taught me that any genuine thank you should be accompanied by a kiss. I believe I thanked you twice,”

Eleana went to kiss his other cheek, but he gently but firmly pushed her back.

“You’re Aunt Elain sounds like an intelligent woman, Eleana, but I don’t think that’s appropriate considering the circumstances.”

He was talking about how although she insisted that they were friends she was still Heir to the Night Court and he was still a bastard born. Someone of her… prestige deserves much better and much more than he could ever offer. Kaden wasn’t stupid. He could read the signals she was giving him – it was a signal he had received from many males and females alike – and he knew that he should try harder to let her down without hurting her feelings.

He could see in her eyes though that he was unsuccessful, and he wondered that how he felt warm from her kiss, she now felt cold and rejected.

“Oh. Kaden, I-”

Unexpectedly the orange flame that was entwined with Eleana’s own – the light that Felix was providing – winked out.

“What the fuck?” Eleana muttered.

Felix’s screams of pain were what answered her question.

 

_____

 

Felix. _Felix_. While Eleana was here wasting time and practically throwing herself at Kaden her cousin was left alone. _Under the fucking Mountain._

Without looking back to make sure Kaden was following her she sprinted after the sounds of Felix. Her flame hadn’t yet died but she had to throw it out in front of her as she ran and ran down the corridor that she saw Felix leave out of.

This place was like a cauldron-damned puzzle, and all she had to try and find Felix was the sound of his agonizing screams.

Fear licked up her spine and adrenaline pumped through her body.

_Where was he where was he where was he_

She twisted and turned though the stone corridors; barely paying any attention to the environment she was in at all. Kaden was gone from her mind, her soul focus now on helping her cousin.

With the next sharp turn to the left, she saw Felix.

And nearly turned around and ran the other way.

He was kneeling on the ground, eyes wide in pure horror and shrieks ripping from his throat. His whole body had gone deathly pale and was straining in a way the made it look as though at any second his muscles would rip and his limbs would tear from his body.

Facing him was something mystifying. Tall and faintly humanoid, this creature had slimy grey skin and limbs that ended in sharp needles rather than hands or feet. It had no face, the only thing on what would’ve been a face was a gaping mouth lined in rows upon rows of teeth. No wonder no one had any idea what could’ve possibly killed those Illyrians. If Amren was here, she would have known.

For only she had been alive when this creature was last seen, and has since been made into a nightmare tale to scare children into behaving.

It was an Impeath.

A creature so vile they were hunted into extinction by the High Lord’s over six millennia ago. It spread its poison to you through particles in the air, making you quick tempered and ill-thinking. While you were in this emotionally vulnerable place they would trap you and suck your soul from you while showing you your deepest darkest fears, fuelling your negative emotions and making it easier for them to overcome you. That explained why Felix and Eleana had been so quick to snap at each other’s throats earlier.

For an Impeath to be here now was impossible.

Eleana didn’t care though, she didn’t care that she had no idea how to kill this creature - she just knew she had to save Felix before he ended up like those Illyrians.

Kaden was at her back, taking in the same scene she was.

“What do we do?!” He shouted over Felix’s cries.

The thing that made the Impeath truly interesting was that it could only attack one thing at a time, and the projection of the thing’s biggest fear wasn’t a mental one but a physical one. If Eleana got close enough, she would be able to see what her cousin’s was.

At least that is what she read in her storybooks as a child.

“You take it from behind, I’ll go in front. I’ll distract it with non-lethal cuts and you go in for the kill. It has to be beheading, and then burning. Don’t go for the heart, it doesn’t have one. And otherwise it can just put itself back together. If you can’t get a clear angle straight away try and cut off its feet. I’ll be going for its ankles while I distract it but I doubt I can get near them with those claws. Understood? Excellent.”

Kaden didn’t answer her before she pulled an Illyrian longsword out of thin air. The weapon looked far too large for her, but with her unnatural fae strength it shouldn’t be a problem. She had also concealed her wings so she had one less weakness on her body.

She treaded lightly so that she was circling the beast, Kaden following suit but going the other way.

She knew he could handle himself, he wouldn’t be in Felix’s Elite if he couldn’t, so Eleana put her concentration and worry solely on Felix.

Felix’s screams had muted to silent pleas of help, and Eleana had no problem obliging.

She sprang forward and lashed her sword at the Impeath, slicing open one of its talons. She saw a flicker of what Felix seeing was but shook it from her mind as the beast let out a roar of pain and shifted its attention to her.

Felix collapsed, unconscious, on the dusty floor where he kneeled, completely gone from the world.

Eleana striked again, this time angling towards the ankles of the creature like she had told Kaden she would do. Kaden did the same from the behind, but aiming for the neck of the ghastly creature.

Its head whipped to the attacker from behind, giving Eleana another shot at its ankles. If she could cut of its feet the Impeath would no longer be able to step and move, making it an easy target for her and Kaden to destroy.

This time she was more successful. She didn’t sever the limb, but four of the five claws on its foot. The claws were enormous and spindly, three feet at least, and the loss of them only infuriated the creature further.

It shrieked in a similar manner to her fallen cousin, and she revelled in the pain she was inflicting on it.

She and Kaden made strikes and parries, mainly leaning on the offensive.

For ten minutes, ten horrible minutes of Felix laying stone cold on the floor with a trickle of blood leaking from his nose, Eleana and Kaden tried vainly to put down the Impeath. Its skin was like steel, hard to cut and strong. Even when they did make an effective mark on it, it was only seconds before the wound healed.

Impatience and recklessness leaking through her body, something that was likely due to the poisons the Impeath emitted from the pores in its skin, Eleana decided to do something she had barely ever attempted to do before.

She was going to mist the bitch.

“Kaden, retreat.” A killing calm had spread through her, and she embodied the commander voice of her father and the bravery of her mother.

“What?!” Kaden yelled, still fighting the Impeath.

“Now, Kaden. _NOW_ _.”_ She yelled.

One look at her and he knew she wasn’t fucking around.

Using one of the opal arrows the forest gifted to her, Eleana winnowed behind the Impeath and stabbed it through the back of the head, so that the pointed end was now protruding through its mouth. Its yellow blood squirted everywhere at the impact, but it barely jarred the Impeath at all. It did succeed however in annoying it enough to forget about its earlier prey and attacker and concentrate on her.

She saw Kaden in the corner of her eye carrying a slumped Felix out of range, and she knew it was now or never.

Moving her arms and propelling her magic at the beast felt like dragging herself through the thickset mud. It was thick and she could barely move, and fuck she may as well have been trying to push the whole mountain.

The creature screamed, but was still whole.

Or she thought it was.

Eleana nearly gave up until she saw the first signs of blood-rain. At the sight of what she could see, she pushed harder and harder, heaving her magic at it.

It yelped and cried and screeched and flailed around but there was nothing it could do against the Heir’s power.

_______

 

When it was over, and the storybook being was gone, the air had been filled with the yellow blood-rain that was usually a consequence of misting.

Kaden sagged in relief – she had done it, the thing was dead – but he wasn’t met with a similar reaction from Eleana.

She was still standing as straight as a rod with her arms raised and eyes staring vacantly ahead. She was quaking uncontrollably and Kaden could see sweat pouring down her forehead.

“Eleana?” He said cautiously.

She didn’t respond.

“Eleana?” He tried again.

It was like she couldn’t hear him, but there was no way that could be the case.

He still had one of Felix’s arms slung over his shoulder and one of his own wrapped around Felix’s waist, but placed him on the floor when Eleana started to emit small, whimpering noises.

Kaden advanced towards her, walking so that rather than approaching her from the side he was standing directly in front of her.

Big mistake.

It was obvious now that Eleana had lost control of her magic. Obvious because as Kaden stood in front of her his fighting leathers started to turn to black dust as she misted them.

 _“_ _Eleana_ _,”_

Rather than jumping out of the path of her onslaught on magic, Kaden walked until he was a foot away, the same way she always did with him. He could tell that internally she was struggling. His leathers continued to disappear, but not a hair on his body was touched by her deadly magic.

Simply saying her name wasn’t getting her attention, or snapping her out of the trance she was in, so Kaden did the one thing he had experienced her do countless times for comfort.

He reached out, intertwined their fingers, and held her hands. One in each, as though that action alone could save her from herself.

At the contact, the glassy look in her eyes stated to fade, and were instead replaced by tears.

In all her illegible whimpering she said one word that made him know it was over.

“Kaden?” It was nothing but a whisper.

She collapsed.

She was still conscious – it was like she just didn’t have enough strength to stand anymore.

Kaden caught her in her arms, holding her the way he had on the day they first met when she had suddenly fallen ill and needed to be taken to Felix’s house.

“Your leathers! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry Kaden.” She cried.

She may have escaped the trance she was in but Eleana was still quivering so hard that Kaden had to pull her as tight to his chest as he could so that he didn’t drop her by accident.

“Why did you step in front of me? Why would you do that? I could’ve killed you!”

“No you wouldn’t have. You were under control - you just needed some… help.” He told her.

“Maybe you’re right, like I could ever harm such a pretty face.” She joked, but it was barely more than a whisper.

Kaden laughed. If she was joking, it meant that she felt better.

Which was excellent considering she was the only one who could get them out of the Mountain.

He placed her next to Felix, who was starting to regain consciousness. Felix was still lying on the ground, his bloody nose having stopped, and Eleana was sitting at his side. She grabbed his hand in a tight squeeze, as if to reassure herself that he was there and that he was safe. Kaden reflected on how she had told him that Felix was her best friend. He suspected Felix may be one of few friends.

Hopefully they would both be quick to recover. Kaden didn’t know what type of flame Eleana had created, but it had survived her meltdown but was fading at an unsettling pace.

He crouched in front of her, using the tips of his fingers to lift her chin so that they were looking at each other.

“When you’re ready, I need you to winnow us out, alright? You only have to go as far as the entrance, after that I can take care of it.” He said as soothingly as he could. He reached out and clasped her free hand, knowing innately that it would help her.

“When – when you – when we’re out you can’t – you can’t get my uncle Cassian. Or my Aunt Nesta. Please. Promise me, Kaden.” Eleana begged.

Kaden understood that seeing their son like this would distress them, but it was inevitable that they would find out. Kaden expressed this to Eleana and at the statement feverishness entered her eyes. Using the hand that wasn’t holding his she let go of Felix and gripped the back of Kaden’s neck and (intentionally or unintentionally, Kaden didn’t know) dug her nails into his skin.

“ _You can’t._ You don’t understand.” She stressed.

“Then help me, Eleana. Why can’t I let them know?”

“Because Cassian and Nesta are what he saw. _Cassian and Nesta are his greatest fear_ _.”_


	4. Chapter 4

Rhys loved the rare moments where he could be completely free of stress and simply spend time with his family. They were all in his longue at the camp, Nesta had even brought little Quathryn, and were merrily drinking and chatting away. They all had such busy lives now – busy but happy. The only thing missing was his baby girl and nephew.

He strongly suspected that she and Felix were off drinking somewhere as well – it was well into the night and he hadn’t seen his daughter or nephew since they departed from his office earlier that morning.

Usually a task such as this would’ve been dealt with by the Lord of the camp, maybe Feyre if she felt it was necessary. The reason they had chosen to give the job to Felix was so that he could gain more experience in this area. Rhys was planning on promoting him to something more, maybe a general, maybe something else. He wasn’t sure yet. He knew that Felix was ready for more responsibility but also knew that he was young and wild and reckless. A trait he’d inherited straight from his father, and if Cassian was anything to go by Felix may never grow out of it. So this seemed like the perfect opportunity to test his nephew, and by default see what his daughter could do.

The fact that it meant Rhys would have Feyre all to himself for the day may or may not have also been a factor.

Speaking of his mate, she came back into the room holding a tray of drinks to share with her family. The smile she gave him still made him weak at the knees and he was glad he was sitting so his brothers wouldn’t notice and tease him relentlessly for it. Which was ridiculous considering they were the exact same around their partners. Even as he looked at Azriel and Mor – Azriel sitting on the floor between Mor’s legs, her running her hands though his hair and occasionally leaning down to press kisses to the top of his head – and Cassian and Nesta who were wrapped around each other on the adjacent couch. He noticed that both males acted like teenagers in love. Both had goofy smiles for their women, especially Cassian who in all honestly had never been able to control himself around Nesta.

Feyre handed out drinks to anyone that wanted one. All eagerly took them, it had been ages since they’d all just sat around and drank. The only one absent was Amren, who was still happily sailing to all ends of the earth with her Varian. Not her partner, not her lover, not her husband, just Varian. She’d never referred to him as anything else and it had been a hundred years.

Rhys hoped that their children wouldn’t be so dramatic in their relationships. It was awfully bothersome sometimes.

Feyre was handing Mor a drink when she looked out the window behind them. Usually the view looked out onto a triad of roads. One led to the central training grounds, another to the surrounding cabins, and the last to the tents that were designated for the bastard Illyrians. Rhys hated that they were still made to fend for themselves, even small children, but knew that his wonderful mate worked tirelessly to help break down the barriers. Feyre had even managed to snag a few buildings and turn them into share houses for the youngest children. The older the bastards became though the harder it was to convince them to stay in a house as they had already convinced that they didn’t deserve a home. It was the same road that he had seen Cassian walk all those centuries ago.

Whatever Feyre was looking at now was not the nostalgic view Rhys had imagined. Her face when slack and the tray she was holding crashed to the ground – shattering the glasses and covering Morrigan in wine.

“Feyre?” Rhys stood but Feyre vanished before he could take another step.

Mor stood as well and looked out the same window. She gasped in shock and bolted out the front door to whatever she and Feyre had seen.

The rest of the family then crowded towards the window, desperately wanting to see what Feyre and Mor had. Beside him, Cassian froze in absolute horror.

Eleana was there with a bloodied Felix at her side. Felix was barely conscious though, and it took all of Eleana’s effort to keep him upright. Felix was pale as the snow in the Winter Court and his front was covered in blood – a stark contrast.

Feyre took Felix from their daughter and winnowed inside. She was holding him around his waist, Felix draped over her. Strength wasn’t an issue when it came to Feyre, but her nephew was significantly taller and broader than her making supporting him harder.

“ _Felix,”_ Cassian had never sounded so pained, and all it took was one step before he was in front of his son and taking him from Feyre.

“Take him to the table,” Feyre ordered, “lie him down –he needs to get off of his feet.”

Wordlessly Azriel cleared the table and Cassian took his son to lie him down, almost as if he was about to be examined by a healer. Nesta had left, taking the sleeping Quathryn away before she could wake up and see her brother like this. Rhys knew though that as soon as the little girl was settled the fierce Nesta wouldn’t leave Felix’s side.

What had happened? Where was Eleana? She would know – she would know and could tell them what had happened.

Eleana was still outside, her head bowed and her arms slack at her side. Her undone hair was whipping around her in the wind, obscuring her expression from him. She didn’t look injured – she just seemed sad and afraid – but Rhys still rushed to her side as a spike of pure terror ran through his body.

“Eleana?” He approached her urgently, her name a question.

She looked up at her father. “I didn’t realise everyone was here,” was all she said before her face scrunched up in pain.

He scooped her into her arms and in response she held on unrestrainedly to him.

“What happened? What did that to Felix?” He used his most soothing tone and massaged calming circles into her back.

It hurt him so much to see her upset – it always had. She rarely showed that side to herself, but he knew that she felt as deeply and passionately as her mother. Seeing her show this much emotion is startling – something terrible must’ve happened.

“Can you make everyone go away? He won’t wake up unless we’re alone.” She whimpered. Her face was buried in the crook of his neck and her hands were tightly clenching the back of his jacket.

“What do you mean? Why wouldn’t he wake up?” Rhys could hear frantic movement and shouts from inside the cottage.

“Please, can you just – can you make them leave? I wouldn’t have brought him here – I wouldn’t have brought him here if I knew everyone was visiting.”

“ _RHYSAND!”_

At his brother’s call, Rhys’s gaze shot to the house.

He detached himself from his daughter and held on to the top of her arms. “Eleana, I need you to tell me what happened.” This time not a question.

 

_____

 

Eleana couldn’t look him in the eyes. How was she supposed to tell him what had happened? How could she tell him they went Under the Mountain and was attacked by an extinct or mythical creature?

Guilt clawed at her.

When she’d finally been able to winnow them out of the Mountain they had already been sitting in the dark for a while. Her flames had dulled and eventually flickered out altogether, and the only way she knew that Felix and Kaden were still there was because of the steady grip she had on their hands and the sound of their breathing.

Kaden had reassured her to take as much time as she needed, but she knew from the sound of Felix’s ragged breaths and lightless siphons that time was not something they had an abundance of.

She used everything she had left to get them out of the Mountain and then back home again. Kaden insisted once they got back to the camp that he would get a healer and everything would be fine, but Eleana couldn’t risk a healer spreading the knowledge to Cassian or Nesta.

She told Kaden to leave while she took Felix to her mother. He tried to come with them – to help - to the point where she had to _order_ him to leave. She had the nerve to fucking pull rank with her mate.

She hadn’t expected everyone to be at the house - otherwise she never would’ve taken Felix there. She had no idea what it meant when he saw Cassian and Nesta in the Impeath’s attack, but she needed time to talk about it with Felix and not potentially freak him out if he was confronted by his parents.

 _“RHYS, I NEED YOUR HELP.”_ Cassian bellowed for his brother again.

Rhys looked towards the house.

“Go.” She told him.

He kissed her forehead quickly and winnowed into the house, leaving her standing where she was.

She didn’t want to see Felix again – she knew what he would look like and she couldn’t handle it.

She couldn’t handle it because looking at him now one would think that he was dead.

And there was absolutely nothing she could do about it.

She made herself step forward. Then again. And again. Before she knew it she was standing with everyone else scrutinizing Felix.

His head had rolled to one side and he was yet to regain what little consciousness he had when they left the Mountain. The rest of his body had also gone slack, the only movement coming from his chest when he took short, infrequent breaths. His nose had finally stopped bleeding.

Nesta held his head in her hands and the magic she was pouring into him was visible as small tendrils of light. It seemed to be working as Felix’s eyes were slowing opening.

When they finally did his gaze met with that of Nesta, his father only a step behind. Worry over their son was etched into them – Cassian clearly trying to hold back tears.

At the sight of them Felix lurched away and vomited off the side of the table. When he had finished emptying the contents of his stomach on the floor he started clawing, kicking and scratching at them.

“ _Felix_ ,” Nesta cried.

Cassian grabbed Felix’s wrists in an attempt to stop his sudden thrashing but let go when he started screaming the way he did when his soul was being extracted by the Impeath. His howling made everyone flinch and the hairs on everyone’s bodies stand on end.

“Son?” Cassian had never looked so heartbroken.

“Get the _fuck_ away from me. I know you aren’t real- _I KNOW YOU AREN’T REAL_.”

With a wave of his hand Rhys had Felix bound so that he was no longer flailing. That did nothing to stop his screams though and silent tears ran down Nesta’s face.

She reached forward again to try and calm him but all Felix did was let out the most feral snarl Eleana had ever heard. Nesta’s arms had already started bleeding from where Felix’s nails had dug into her skin so she jumped back at the noise.

“Don’t touch me you _bitch_. _I will kill you_ – I will _fucking_ kill you.” Felix growled. He strained against the bindings on him, his face going red form the effort. Eleana supposed she should be glad that there was colour returning to his skin.

Eleana had never heard him talk like this and it became clear to her why quickly.

Felix thought he was still seeing what the Impeath was showing him. He had no idea any of this was real.

Before Eleana had a chance to voice her theory, a small, terrified voice spoke from the corner of the room.

“Lis?” Three year old baby Quathryn was standing at the foot of the table shaking from head to toe. Felix’s screams must’ve woken her up and in the distraction of the noise she managed to slip unnoticed into the room.

Azriel tried to grab her but stopped when Felix started speaking. _Really_ speaking, not just his pained screams.

“Quathryn?” He asked.

He stopped fighting against her father’s dark binding and went limp on the table.

His baby sister sidestepped everyone in the room and ran as fast as her little legs could carry her to her brother’s side. Mor had already gotten rid of his bile with her magic so nothing interfered with tiny Quathryn trying to jump on top of the table to try and help her brother.

At the sight of his sister Felix’s eyes came into focus and for the first time in hours he seemed to comprehend where he actually was.

“Quathryn…” He mumbled again. He turned his body so that he was facing her – her head barely being able to see over the table – and reached down so that he could pick her up.

Nesta nearly snatched away the little girl, but was held back by her mate. Cassian had seen what Eleana had – that Felix would never hurt his little sister, would rather die before he caused her any pain.

Felix brought her onto the table and she curled into him, whimpering _Lis Lis Lis_ over and over again. She wasn’t quite able to say Felix yet and had donned him this nick name in replacement. She was the only one that called him that, and the only person Felix would _allow_ to call him that.

Quathryn was the opposite of Felix. While he was tall and dark she was petite and light. Her honey brown hair matched Nesta’s and her eyes were the same shade of blue. She was also small in stature where Felix had always been taller than his counterparts of the same age.

Felix loved his sister with all his heart. Eleana knew that it killed him every time she went back to Velaris without him – killed him every time his family left. Which is why she was so damned confused.

The whole room was watching the pair with wary eyes – ready to intervene if Felix broke down again.

He didn’t – his sister is exactly what he needed to do to bring him back to reality. He hugged her, careful of the blood that was covering his chest and face. It was a wonder that Quathryn didn’t run screaming from the hideous sight.

His breathing became more even and the redness in his face returned to a normal colour. The feverishness that had entered his body went away leaving instead a shaken Felix and relief.

Cassian approached his son and was met this time with Felix outstretching his hand.

“I don’t feel well…” Felix whispered. He was almost childlike in his behaviour. Eleana knew this wasn’t because of their encounter with the Impeath but rather a child simply needing the comfort of their parents.

It confounded Eleana. She wasn’t mistaken when she saw Cassian and Nesta.

“My baby boy,” Nesta swept forward and pushed back his hair to kiss his forehead. “What happened? What did this to you?” Ice had entered her voice. Not for Felix but for whatever had dared hurt her son like this.

Felix stayed silent.

“Was it whatever killed those Illyrians?” Cassian asked.

Cassian had moved so that he was up against the table. One of his arms was wrapped around Nesta’s waist and the other was gripping Felix’s shoulder.

Felix’s answer was to look away from his parents.

Cassian leaned forward to whisper to his son but with her keen hearing Eleana heard every word.

“Can you not tell us, is that it? Do you – do you want to speak to Azriel instead?”

Felix shook his head, his grip tightening on Quathryn.

She was contently snuggled into her brother – her fear for him subsiding as he held her. However his grip was like a red flag to the adults in the room.

Azriel moved forward so that he could take Quathryn away. Felix let him. All the fight he had left was gone. Azriel handed her to Mor who promptly retreated with her.

“Let’s move him to one of the spare rooms where he can rest. We’ll get answers from him in the morning, but right now he needs to sleep.” Feyre directed.

Cassian hummed in agreement and between him and her father Felix was taken away.

“Still more – still more handsome than you Uncle Rhys,” Felix managed to joke.

Eleana watched them until they were up the stairs and out of her sight.

Despite that Felix was now slightly better – and by slightly better she meant not on the brink of death – Eleana still felt horrendous guilt at what had happened to him. She blamed herself. _Of course she blamed herself_. Whose idea was it to go under the mountain? _Hers._ Who said she could handle the situation? _She did_. Who not only defied one of the most critical laws in Prythian by insisting they go Under the Mountain but then left her cousin unprotected once they did? _Eleana._ Who nearly lost control of her most lethal weapon instead of using that power to escape? _Mother-damned Eleana_.

Her guilt only intensified once her whole family turned to her, demanding answers.

“What the fuck happened, Eleana?” Nesta fumed.

“I-I,” Eleana stuttered. Eleana had seen the wrath of her aunt inflicted on others before but never on her. She prayed to the Mother that it would never happen again.

“I know you know, Eleana, so tell me so that I can help him. Tell me so that I can help my son.” Her fists were clenched and she bared her teeth.

“Don’t use that tone with her, Nesta.” Feyre hissed. “Can’t you see how shaken up she is?”

“She doesn’t look to bad to me. Actually, the only blood on her belongs to my son. My son who is nearly on his death bed and yet here she is looking fine and dandy. I love you, sweet child, but you need to tell us what happened this instant.”

“I said don’t speak to her like that, Nesta!” Feyre barked. “If you can’t talk about this rationally then piss off.”

Eleana beheld their argument and wanted nothing more than to flee from the two. It seemed Azriel had the same idea. He was the only one left as Mor was tending to Quathryn and Rhys and Cassian to Felix. With Lucien and Elain sequestered away at the Autumn Court there was no one else.

Az stepped between the snarling fae to make sure they didn’t lunge at each other. On a normal day they were both like prowling fire drakes that would protect their babies at all costs. Felix being injured and emotions running high made those instincts skyrocket.

“Stop,” One word from him and the two females took ragged breaths and turned away from each other.

Eleana’s mother turned to her instead, her gaze softening and a small smile on her face. “Can you tell us, Laya? It might be important for us to know if we’re to properly heal Felix. I know you’re scared, but-”

“We went Under the Mountain.” Eleana interrupted.

All three of them stiffened.

“What?” Her father said from the top of the stairs. He must’ve been done with helping Cassian and Felix.

“We… we found the trail of the creature that killed those Illyrians and it led to the Mountain. We knew that it was inside and we thought that between Felix and me we’d be able to handle it ourselves. We were _wrong_.” Eleana’s voice cracked on the last word. “I’m so sorry,” She cried. “We had no idea what we were doing and I never would’ve done it if I had known what the consequences would be. I never wanted him to get hurt. I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry.”

Rhys descended the stairs to stand next to Feyre. He linked their hands and both had matching expressions of puzzlement.

“Under the Mountain? That’s impossible… the strongest fae in existence made those wards. How could you possibly have gone inside?” Rhys questioned.

“I broke them and then I winnowed us in. Maybe they’ve become weak over time, it really wasn’t that difficult.” She admitted.

“I rejuvenated those wards a month ago and they were flawless…” Rhys pondered.

“When you say _we_ ,” Nesta asked, “do you mean only you and Felix? Or was someone else there?”

Ah, the question Eleana had been dreading. She already knew her answer, her lie. “It was just us.” She told them. “We thought we’d be able to deal with it on our own.” She reiterated.

She couldn’t tell them about Kaden without them interrogating him as well, and she couldn’t let that happen. Couldn’t… inflict them upon him. The first time they meet her mate, and they _will_ meet her mate, it’s not going to be in a situation like this.

“And what creature did you find?” Feyre finally asked the biggest question.

“I don’t know if you’ll believe me.” Eleana replied honestly.

At her answer Rhys dropped his wife’s hand and instead moved so that he could hold his daughter’s. “Of course we’ll believe you,” he said it so genuinely - with so much love and warmth on this horrible day that Eleana believed him without a trace of doubt.

“It was an Impeath.” She told them.

Nesta automatically adopted a sceptical look, one Eleana saw her mother trying to refrain from.

“That’s not possible, my dear. I think you might be mistaken. What did it look like, what did it do?” Rhys inquired further.

“I assure you it was an Impeath. The skin, the claws, everything. It was exactly the way the pictures were drawn in my books as a child. Right down to the fears and souls. We tracked it into the mountain and into the maze. You know the maze where you slew the Middengard Wyrm? And then Felix scouted ahead and that’s when I heard him screaming and I ran to help but-”

“Stop, Laya.” Rhys gently lifted her chin with his hands. “I think you’re tired and confused. How about we all go to bed and talk about it in the morning?”

Eleana pushed his hands away. “I’m not confused. I know what I saw and it was an Impeath-”

“What you described isn’t an Impeath, Laya. The pictures in your story books are just an artist’s interpretation. No one knows what an Impeath looked like and it’s likely no one ever will.” He insisted.

“There was one Under the Mountain, I swear it.”

“Eleana…”

“Summon Amren, she’ll know. She’ll tell you that what I saw was an Impeath.” Eleana started pacing across the room – running her hands through her hair in nervousness.

“Maybe we can go in the morning,” Nesta suggested, “you can show us the body and one of us can confirm what it was.”

“There is no body,” Eleana gulped. “I couldn’t kill it with blades. I had to mist it.”

Eleana didn’t miss the look of concern Feyre and Rhys shared.

Telling them that she misted the Impeath made her story even less credible.

The few times Eleana had tested that power it had gone disastrously. The last time she had tried and failed her father told her that perhaps they should wait a few decades before trying again. If her magic had time to mature and strengthen maybe then she’d be able to control it.

To tell them she had taken down an aggressive and ferocious creature such as an Impeath by misting it… well she could understand why they’d doubt her.

And the truth?

The truth was what was causing the majority of Eleana’s guilt.

The truth was that if Kaden hadn’t been there to bring her back from the darkness then she probably would’ve killed Felix, and then most likely herself.

Eleana may have been able to ignore the concern from her parents, but the way Azriel and Nesta were looking at her-

“Rhys, Feyre.”

Mor suddenly appeared in the middle of the room.

The bottom of her dress was covered in mud and she had tied her long hair back to keep it out of her face.

“Where’s Quathryn?” At her dishevelled state, Nesta was probably petrified for her second child.

“Asleep. I went to the Mountain and checked all the entrances. The wards are fine. They haven’t been breached, haven’t been altered. I went to see as soon as I heard what you said, Eleana, I had to make sure nothing else would find itself wondering into there - whether by accident or on purpose.” Mor explained.

“No- _No_. I broke them. I broke the wards.” She knew she sounded mad and agitated, but they had to believe her.

Her father lifted his arms as if to embrace her but she pushed him away again.

Hurt flashed across his face but it was soon replaced with resolution.

“I don’t know what happened tonight-”

“I just told you!”

“But I think we all need to rest and deal with this when we’re not all so pedantic.” Rhys continued as if she hadn’t interrupted.

The way they were all focused on her made her feel crazy.

What was worse though was the ache in her chest when she realised her family truly didn’t believe her.

 

____

 

Azriel thought he had never felt that kind of fear when he saw the state Felix was in, but looking at Laya was something on a whole other spectrum.

They should’ve payed more attention to her when she brought Felix home.

Her eyes were so wide that her irises were surrounded by white and the way her body was twitching and her eyes were darting around the room showed him that something was seriously wrong with his niece. He didn’t know if it was the creature that had hurt Felix or something else entirely. What he did know was that whatever had happened left Laya in this hysterical condition.

“I’m not crazy,” she muttered under her breath.

“We know,” Feyre assured her in a voice just as quiet.

“Then why don’t you believe me?” Laya whimpered. “Why don’t you believe me?!” She said louder and more angrily.

Before anyone could say anything else Nesta winnowed so that she was behind their niece and shot magic in her lower back.

At the touch Laya feinted.

Rhys was quick and caught her before she could hit the ground but fumbled with her limp body. Feyre helped her mate support their daughter’s weight.

“It had to be done,” Nesta answered everyone’s silent question. “She needs to rest. Mother knows what happened today but we won’t get any answers from her while she’s like this.”

Feyre nodded in agreement and made no effort to hide her tears.

“We never should’ve let them deal with this,” She sobbed. “Our beautiful children… I feel terrible.”

Azriel understood the fear and guilt that Feyre, Rhys, Cassian and Nesta were. It was written all over their faces.

Azriel didn’t have any children of his own – he and Mor weren’t quite ready yet – but the way he loved those children was unquestionable. Just like their parents they had become beacons of light in his shadowed life and seeing them like this made him feel sick to his stomach.

“I’ll take her to her room and stay with her tonight. I don’t want her waking up and not knowing where she is or what’s going on,” Rhys said.

Rhys was now holding Laya on his own. He’d picked her up into his arms and was rocking her back and forth the way he did when she was a small child.

“I thought you had to be back to Velaris by morning. Keir requested that meeting at the Court of Nightmares months ago.” Mor reminded him.

Azriel hummed in agreement.

“I can be with her tonight, and you can come back tomorrow after you’re done.” Feyre was trying to find a compromise, even if it was evident that she was sick of doing so.

“No. Keir can wait - I don’t give a fuck if he wants this meeting. I’m not leaving her, or you Feyre, while she’s like this. I’m not leaving my family. You are the most important things in my life, before being High lord, before needing to run a Court. I’m not going to abandon you.”

A look of loving understanding crossed Feyre’s face.

“Oh Rhys… You could never abandon us. We both know that.”

Rhys’s eyebrows furrowed and silver lined his eyes.

He adjusted his grip so that Laya’s face was now resting in the crook of his shoulder and he could rest his check against her head.

“Does she, though? Why didn’t she summon me if they were in that much danger? What if she doesn’t know that I would do anything for her? I’m so far away – all the time. She is the single most precious thing-” His voice cracked and a single tear escaped.

Feyre reached forward and wiped it away.

“She knows, Rhys. _I_ know, too. Let’s get her to bed, okay? I’ll deal with Keir in the morning.”

Rhys nodded and started to walk Laya to her room, all the while whispering something to his daughter.

As his brother passed him, Azriel heard what he was saying.

_“I love you so much. You are my favourite person in the entire world. I won’t leave you again – I promise my little butterfly, I won’t leave you again.”_


	5. Chapter 5

The exercise they were doing was simple enough. First they had to fly through an obstacle course of swinging pendulums all the while being shot at with oak arrows. After making it through that they had to fly to a mountain peak to retrieve whatever the ‘treasure’ was that day. Sometimes it was a person, sometimes it was an object like some gold or a weapon, sometimes it was something random like a book. After you had retrieved this item Illyrians who weren’t part of the aerial unit would try and attack you and see if they can bring you down. They also fired more arrows, except this time they are on fire. And you had to finish it in less than fifteen minutes.

Eleana thinks it is simple enough because she is the only one in her unit to have successfully completed it with a perfect score, and one of eleven other Illyrians in the whole camp.

She wasn’t scheduled to do it today, but practise never hurt anyone.

Eleana also desperately needed something to get her mind off of what had happened the previous night.

She didn’t know what she was more pissed about – Being stupid enough to bring Felix home to a house full of people, herself for not convincing her family of what happened, or about her family having the audacity to knock her out rather than just talking more.

When she had awoken the darkness in her veins was roaring in fury. She needed to get out of the house and she needed to put a damper on her power the only way she knew how – working it off.

She stepped up to the platform, ready to take off.

“I don’t think I need to explain the directive, so I?” Inquired the man who supervising the course.

She scoffed, “Of course not.”

It was less than a minute before a distant bell rang signalling for her to start.

Her wings extended open and in a mighty flap she was soaring through the air. The pendulums were easy to dodge – it was the arrows she had to look out for. With a quick movement to the left and a dive down, Eleana successfully avoided all the arrows shot at her. It continued like this until the last seconds.

Up, down, left, right, left, down, up.

Over and over and over again until she was free flying to the peak of the lowest mountain – ready to get her prize.

She landed swiftly on the platform that today held a golden broach. Eleana wondered what Lady they had stolen _that_ off.

She carefully placed it in her bag. Eyes were everywhere watching what she was doing and grievous treatment of the objects made you lose marks. The object was meant to simulate something that you might have to get in a war if you were acting as a retrievant for the army. It could be an enemy, a letter, anything they could think off. That’s why they were so incessant that the female squadrons did this simulation as much as possible. It was stupid. Really stupid. The males weren’t made to do it as much and focused more on hand to hand combat. All that achieved was excellent women flyers with not as much brute power as their male counterparts, and males who (even though magnificent flyers) would never attain the skills that the females had.

It frustrated Eleana to no end. She loved to fly and she was undeniably good at it, but sometimes she felt like pummelling someone into the ground. Is that too much to ask? Apparently so. At least she had Felix to teach her whenever they weren’t busy.

She pivoted and went back into the air. The second part was more challenging but she’d manage.

As soon as she was in the air there was an assault of alight arrows. Eleana easily could’ve used her magic to put them out or send them away, but just like her father she had been banned from using the majority of her magic while she was training at camp. When she trained those particular skills she either did it with her mother or father in a secluded place where she wouldn’t accidently hurt someone.

It was almost easy the way she evaded the arrows flying at her – it was instinctual.

The men attacking her are a different story.

A brutish man slammed into her from the side making her lose momentum. She flew in place, facing him.

He, unlike her, was holding a broadsword – one he looked eager to use. An arrogant smirk was plastered on his face.

She smiled innocently at him. Men really should know better by now than to misjudge her because she was a woman.

He swung and she eluded him. This happened a second time, then a third.

His irritation was palpable and Eleana loved it.

He tried again but this time overestimated his own strength. He sung too quickly and too hard and it was almost effortless for Eleana to dodge and swoop so that she was behind to him. Eleana clasped her hands around his neck and clenched her fingers. This was a signal that she had ‘broken’ his neck and it was time for him to leave.

This happened four more times before she steadily landed on the ground in front of her squadron leader, Alixia.

All she wanted to do was fly away again.

Because next to Alixia was a certain thunderous High Lord.

 

______

 

Rhys could count on his fingers how many times in his life he had felt as powerless as he did last night.

When his mother and sister died.

When Amaratha killed Feyre.

When Feyre went back to the Spring Court.

When the Book of Breathings was destroyed.

Now.

Rhys had fully intended to stay awake all night to make sure his girl was safe. He had pulled up a chair next to her bed and held one of her hands as she slept. When it was the early hours of the morning he decided to rest his head on the edge of her mattress. He should’ve known that he would fall asleep within seconds.

Feyre had already left to the Court of Nightmares with Azriel and Mor joining her. He had kissed her goodbye and promised her he would take care of their daughter. Feyre never doubted that he would, and told him exactly that, but his feelings of inadequacy had yet to leave him.

In fact, they were only intensified when he awoke to the blinding sun shining through to windows and no Eleana to be seen.

He freaked out, rushing around the house scouring for his daughter.

He had no idea where she was. It wouldn’t be the first time she had slept walked and wondered out of the house – especially if she was having one of her nightmares.

He stormed into the room Felix was staying in – Cassian and Nesta already awake and alert. They had heard his bustling around but had been too preoccupied with their son to think too much about it. It wasn’t until Rhys explained that Eleana was gone that they really started to get worried.

“How long has it been since she’s dreamt about the Room?” Nesta inquired.

That was the worst of Eleana’s nightmares and something that often made her run screaming in the middle of the night whether she was asleep or not. Rhys still remembers the horrifying moment when she was seven years old and he and his wife had awoken to find her bed empty and no sign of her anywhere. Eventually they found her walking down the Rainbow with her eyes closed trying to get back home again. When they asked her where she had been she told them that she’d woken up on the beach after having a bad dream. They put new wards on everyone’s houses after that – ones that meant she couldn’t leave unless she was awake or with an adult.

“I don’t know,” Rhys answered.

“What do you mean ‘you don’t know?’?” This time from Cassian.

“We haven’t talked about it lately…”

Cassian looked affronted at the news but was smart and kept his thoughts to himself.

Before they continued Felix rolled over so he was facing his parents and uncle, all of which had no idea he was even awake.

“Felix!” Nesta lurched forward and starting planting kisses over her son’s face.

“Oh stop being so dramatic. And to answer your question – it’s been well over a month since she’s had any nightmares, let alone one about the Room, and if it’s this early in the morning then she’ll be training either with her aerial unit or training on her own by the West Mountains. All sorted? Lovely.”

With that Felix turned over and closed his eyes to continue sleeping.

Rhys did nothing but stutter until he sprinted from the house to find his girl.

He didn’t understand why she had left to train after what happened yesterday or why she didn’t wake him up when she did, but damned if he wouldn’t find out.

He didn’t start to get mad until he found her and saw what she was doing.

It was their most advanced course they had for the aerial units, and the most dangerous. To see arrows being fired at his daughter and men twice her size attacking her… It didn’t matter that she avoided them all and won against the Illyrian males – his blood was boiling.

He knew he shouldn’t coddle her – knew that she was fully capable of defending herself – but whenever he looked at her it didn’t matter her age or strength. He still saw the tiny baby with tufts of dark hair and a smile so innocent and pure that even the darkest of creatures would fall at her knees.

She was so intelligent, so practical and logical. Why in the Cauldron was doing something so strenuous after what happened the night before. Felix was still fully incapacitated and Eleana was here?

He stood silently next to her instructor, a woman he greatly respected, to wait for his daughter.

When she landed she had a look of pure exhilaration on her face – one that turned stormy upon seeing him.

She strode up to Alixia and calmly handed her a broach from her bag before turning her back and walking away.

Rhys easily caught up to her and matched her strides.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He inquired.

“I have things to do – I don’t just sit around all day.” She snapped.

He was a bit taken aback. He wasn’t expecting this kind of reaction from her and certainly didn’t know what he had done to trigger it.

Eleana had closed her eyes, something she often did when she wanted to escape wherever she was, and was guiding her way through the camp with her other senses alone.

“I know that.” He replied calmly. It didn’t matter how much she snapped, he wouldn’t do it back.

“Great, now that we’ve come to an understanding you can leave now. I’ll see you at dinner.” She had a tone of finality to her voice and suddenly changed the direction that she walking.

Rhys grabbed her by her upper arm – not hard enough to hurt but hard enough to make her stop.

“Laya-”

“Don’t ‘Laya’ me. Don’t you have better things to do? I’m sure there’s some High Lord activity that you can entertain yourself with.” She opened her eyes and they were laced with fury – fury and hurt.

“Eleana,” His voice was full of warning, “stop it with the attitude, okay? I don’t know what’s got you so riled up this morning but why don’t we just go talk about it? Let’s go home – I’ll make you breakfast, and Felix was awake before I left this morning, and we can all talk-”

“So now you want to talk?” She interrupted, “How about when I wanted to talk, tried to talk, to you last night? If you don’t like what I have to say are you just going to knock me out again?”

Ah, so that was what this was about. Rhys hadn’t thought about how she might feel after that.

“Eleana, Nesta had to do that. You were in no position to have a serious conversation and there was no other way to calm you down.”

“You didn’t even try another way! I’m not one of your fucking soldiers, I’m your _daughter_ , but maybe being away for so long has made you forget that. I’m not some child anymore, an infant trying to play with the adults. Yesterday was so horrible and I _needed_ you. I needed you to act like my father –not my High Lord. And do you want to know what the worst thing is?”

Rhys was too stunned by her outrage to reply.

She scoffed but he could see tears of frustration lining her eyes.

“The worst thing is,” Eleana continued, “is that I know you still don’t believe a word I’ve said.”

“I believe that you think they are true, but I don’t know if that is what actually happened. It’s impossible. There are so many things that don’t make sense with what you told us. And I’m not just talking about the Impeath or the wards. Do you remember what you told us about the Maze?”

She nodded.

Rhys moved his hand so that instead he had a hand resting on her check. Surprisingly, she didn’t bat it away.

“That maze was destroyed a long, long time ago. Before we sealed the Mountain we made sure to eradicate anything from Amaratha’s reign. We obliterated the maze, the dungeons, the death camps, it’s all gone now. We did it not only to pay respect to the sacred mountain but also to make sure that the memory of her would no longer taint our land.”

Her head fell and she released a shuddered breath.

“Okay,” was all she said.

“Come home with me. I’ll make you you’re favourite blueberry and white chocolate scones and we can eat with Cassian, Nesta, Quathryn and even Felix if he feels up to it.”

Rhys enveloped her in a hug and she wrapped her arms around him tightly in answer.

“I didn’t mean what I said about you never being here,” She mumbled into him, “you’re the best father in Prythian. I only said it because I wanted to hurt your feelings the way you had hurt mine.”

Rhys pulled her in closer.

He realised that standing in the middle of a dirt road between two houses was probably not the best place to have this conversation but now that they had started he felt if they moved the conversation would stop. And he didn’t want that. Eleana was saying things that he had been scared of for a long time – like that he was too far away and he didn’t really know her because of it.

“Sometimes I’m scared,” she whispered, “that you don’t love me as much as I love you, or you don’t miss me-”

“ _Never_.” Rhys was mortified. He can’t believe she felt like this - that he hadn’t _realised_ she felt like this. “You and your mother and the two most important things in my life. You bring me so much happiness and I count down the days until I see you again.” He rested his cheek against the top of her head.

How had this happened?

 

_____

 

Eleana and her father talked a little longer before walking back to the house arm in arm.

Her father made good on his promise and made her favourite breakfast. The others did indeed join them, even Felix.

He was wrapped tightly in a blanket and winced with every movement, but at least the colour was returning to his cheeks and he was smiling again.

When Eleana saw him as he walked down the stairs she couldn’t help but to go to him and wrap her arms around him and apologize for what happened. He pushed her away – affectionately - and told her nothing happened that he hadn’t been willing to face. He knew that risks as much as she did.

Eleana did make a point to subtly say loudly enough for everyone to hear the next time it shouldn’t just be the _two_ of them _._

He hummed in what would sound like agreement to their parents, but was actually conceding to her lie. Felix would also pretend like Kaden had never been there.

The pleasantries lasted until the end of breakfast.

Cassian distracted his daughter by giving her a puzzle and setting her up within seeing range in the longue room and then took his place next to his wife and brother and across from their children.

Felix and Eleana looked at each other wide eyed, knowing what was about to happen.

“Felix, Eleana already told us what she thinks happened and we want to know what you remember.” Nesta’s voice was laced with doubt, most likely because Eleana’s story still made little to no sense to her.

“I remember everything – I’m sure Eleana told you-”

“We know what Eleana said, but we want to hear what _you_ have to say.”

Felix raised his eyebrows. “We tracked something, we didn’t know what it was, and the path led us to one of the sealed entrances to the Mountain. I thought that was it, we’d either have to stop or contact Drakon to see how we might get in. Eleana told me she thought she could break the wards enough to winnow us in. I thought that was ridiculous and we bickered. As much as it kills me to admit she was right, she was. She winnowed us in and we found ourselves in the Middengard Maze. I was kind of astounded – I thought it had been destroyed. Eleana…”

This was where it got tricky. Felix knew not to mention Kaden but also didn’t know what Eleana told them had happened in the moments when she was with Kaden and not Felix – he didn’t know what story she had spun for their family.

“Eleana stayed to check out the maze while I continued on.”

Eleana made a minuscule sigh of relief. It was a sign to Felix that he was correct in his guess.

“I was walking along, following markings on the walls that were indicative that something else had been there. I didn’t even hear it before it was in front of me. It was the most disgusting thing I had ever seen. It was grey and its skin was slick. It has talons on its arms and legs no face. It, um, it didn’t even need to physically attack me. Instead it showed me these things – repulsive, terrifying things – and I couldn’t move. I would’ve sworn up and down at that moment that what I was seeing was real and as I saw these things it felt as though the creature was ripping me from my insides out. It was like my body was being torn apart.”

His voice was rough with use. All the screaming he had done yesterday was undeniably the cause.

“Next thing I know I’m here surrounded by everyone and Quathryn is calling my name.” He finished.

His story matched hers perfectly – just like she knew it would.

Eleana hated to think it, but there was a moment that their doubt had made her question herself.

“But what attacked you?” Cassian probed.

“I – I don’t know. It was so strange… Do you remember when I was young and you read me stories before bed?” Felix was talking solely to Cassian now.

Cassian nodded.

“There was this one story that used to scare the living shit out of me,” Felix laughed.

How he managed to stay up beat even in a situation like this astonished Eleana.

“It was about this naughty fae child who after breaking rules set by his parents was kidnapped by this monster called an Impeath,”

At the words all the adults stiffened.

“The thing that attacked me matched its description perfectly.” Felix continued, ignoring the reaction of this parents and uncle.

Everyone stayed silent – no one quite knew what to say.

Eleana and Felix both could feel the awkward tension in the air. Felix may be an unfathomably talented warrior but awkward tension was not something he could deal with.

“Well,” he said to break the silence, “If that’s all you need then I’ll be on my way. I need to check on my Elite and I’m already late from sleeping so much.”

Felix tried to stand but his legs wobbled like a newborn fawn.

“Oh no you don’t,” Nesta said while Cassian stood and walked around the table to help support his son. “You need much more rest, my boy.”

“I really don’t, I promise.” As he said it his legs collapsed under his weight and Cassian had to guide him back onto the chair.

“I’ll go see to their progress and Rhys might even join me if he’s finished being domestic.” Cassian assured his son.

“I’d quite like to see their progress, actually. Eleana, will you escort us?” Rhys questioned.

“Of course,” she replied.

“Excellent, that means there is no reason for you not to get more rest.” Nesta gave her son a sweet smile and grabbed his hand that was now resting on the table.

Felix’s eyes widened in horror, “what did that to your arms?” He demanded from Nesta.

Her sweet smile turned sad. They were covered in scratches and bruises from Felix’s fit and the stress Nesta was under meant they hadn’t completely healed yet. The fact that they were still so bad must’ve meant that yesterday they were substantially worse.

“Did – did I do that? _Cauldron_ , I’m so sorry.”

His memories from his breakdown must’ve been coming back to him in violent waves from the look on his face.

“You weren’t yourself, Felix, and there is nothing to be sorry for. I wasn’t myself either,” Nesta turned her full gaze onto Eleana, “I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you last night, Laya. I’ve been acting irrationally lately and my emotions have been all over the place. I took that out on you and I’m apologize.”

“You were acting for what you thought was the best. I can’t fault you on that Aunt Nesta.”

The two women smiled at one another – Eleana’s anger towards her fading away.

“You can if you want. I know I was acting as fiery as a drake. I have been a lot lately…”

Cassian moved away from his son to stand behind his mate and placed a hand on her shoulder.

“We wanted to tell everyone yesterday,” he said, “but once everything happened we wanted to make sure Eleana and Felix were okay first.”

“Tell us what?” Felix asked.

Nesta and Cassian beamed at each other.

“I’m with child,” Nesta rejoiced.

Rhys whooped in joy and stood to give his brother a hug.

Nesta and Cassian were too distracted by Rhys to notice the way Felix’s face fell at the news.

By the time they did pay him attention again his face had been schooled into a mask of happiness.

What in the Cauldron’s name was that about?

 

_____

 

Eleana and her father and uncle trudged in the forest trying to find the Elite. They weren’t where they usually were and some random maid had told them that she saw them heading in this direction at dawn.

Eventually they found them scattered among the edges of the Western Mountains, scouring and rummaging among the ground. From where she stood with her uncle and father she could see Kaden’s shock of blonde hair standing across a small clearing with another of Felix’s soldiers at his side.

Seeing that they were the only two who weren’t rummaging around in the woods Cassian and her father headed straight for them.

Oh shit.

Kaden turned his head to see who was approaching and brightened when he saw Eleana. The soldier at his side however bowed deeply. Kaden should have as well at the approach of his High Lord but was too distracted by Eleana’s smile. He did end up bowing, but it was well after the other Illyrian male had.

Eleana glanced her at father and saw a disapproving look on his face – whether it was because he noticed that Kaden and Eleana knew each other or because he thought he had a rebellious Illyrian on his hands she didn’t know.

“Is this the Elite?” Rhys asked.

They both stood straight again at the question.

“Yes, High Lord.” The other solider confirmed.

Eleana really should know his name, but his brown hair and eyes made him unremarkable to her. Maybe he was another new member.

“What is your business here? We were under the impression you would be in the training yard practising sword fighting. That is where Felix instructed you to be.” This time Cassian.

The brunette Illyrian looked confused and Kaden did too.

“We came here at Felix’s orders to practise tracking, General. Felix left the instructions with Kaden.”

“And Kaden would be?” Her father inquired.

“That would be me, High Lord.”

Beautiful, lovely, lying Kaden. He knew that Felix wouldn’t show up this morning so pretended that Felix left him instructions to practise tracking. Eleana knew he could’ve picked any number of skills but tracking was what he was best at. Not only did the lie cover for the absent Felix, it was also a valuable way to spend their time.

“When did Felix leave these instructions? He’s been indisposed the last two days.” Cassian eyed him with suspicion.

“He left them with me yesterday morning, General. Lady Eleana can vouch for me I’m sure.”

All eyes turned to her so she plastered a smile on her face. Kaden eye’s seemed to beg her to help him. Kaden may be an excellent tracker but his manipulation skills were lacking - which was not at all a fault to his character. Luckily, Eleana was a well versed liar.

“Ah, yes. It must have slipped my mind.” She sent an apologetic smile to her father and uncle that she knew they would believe in a second. She moved closer to them to make it seem like she was trying to speak in a way that only they would hear. “I just forgot. We did it yesterday morning before – before everything happened…”

“Not a problem,” Rhys pulled her to his side and tucked her in close.

“Well there’s no point watching them do this. We’ll both be here tomorrow and we can inspect them then.” Cassian nodded to Rhys.

Rhys faced Kaden and the other Illyrian. “We’ll be back tomorrow and expect a full briefing on your skill sets – flying to stamina. Carry on, Soldiers.”

With that Rhys and Cassian dismissed the two men and were on their way.

Eleana lingered back though.

“What are you doing, Laya?” Her father asked. Concern shone on his face.

“I just need to do a few things. I’ll see you tonight.” She answered.

Cassian and her father looked sceptical.

“I would prefer it if you came home…” Her father told her.

She went up to him and quickly kissed his cheek. “I’ll be fine, and I’ll summon you if I need you. I promise.”

He hummed in doubt but conceded. “Okay, but I want you to check in with me and tell me what time you think you’re going to be home. Your mother should be home by midnight, if not a bit before.”

 

_____

 

Rhys and Cassian left, arms around each other’s shoulders and joking about possible baby names.

As soon as they were out of sight Eleana turned back to find Kaden waiting for her.

“ _Eleana_ ,”

She threw her arms around his shoulders and he wrapped his arms around her waist.

“Are you okay? Where’s Felix? I’ve been so worried.” His words came out in quick gasps and he buried his face in her neck.

“I’m fine, but _Cauldron_ Felix was in bad shape. If we had been any longer he could’ve died.”

Kaden pulled back from her and rested his forehead on hers.

His actions were… unexpected, but welcome all the same. Eleana was worried that after he rejected her Under the Mountain things may have become a little awkward but that didn’t seem to be the case at all.

“I swear I could feel your panic. But then it was just gone and I wasn’t sure what was happening. Maybe I was dreaming – maybe I was just tuned into your magic after everything. I don’t know what it was but it petrified me.”

Eleana pulled back from him so she could look him in the eyes. His hands were still gloriously on her waist and hers now rested on either side of his neck, her thumbs grazing his jaw. Was he feeling the bond? Now probably wasn’t the time to think about it.

“When I got there Cassian and Nesta were there-”

“Shit,”

“Tell me about it,” She sighed. “I don’t what to think about it. At his reactions to them last night I thought maybe the fear had to do with them getting hurt or something similar but then this morning he acted so strange when Nesta told us she was pregnant. I know there’s something more to this. I just need to talk to him, only problem is now they won’t leave his side.”

“What did they say about the Impeath?”

“They don’t believe me,” Eleana groaned.

“What?!” He looked scandalized. “How could they not believe you and Felix? I can talk to them to – I can help convince them.”

He looked so determined to help her - it made her heart flutter in unusual ways.

“I wouldn’t worry about it. I think the only person who can help us now would be Amren, but she’s Mother knows where. I could try and contact her through her dreams but I have nothing of hers to help me make a connection and she’d skin me alive if I broke into her apartment. Well… that’s an exaggeration but she wouldn’t be happy.”

“There must be another way…”

“What does it matter? The thing’s dead. Thank you though. Not just for the offer but for yesterday.”

He smiled at her and Cauldron it made her weak at the knees.

This was so different from the way they normally interacted, not so much the topic matter but the way they acted. He had never touched her so much before and damn if she wanted him to keep doing it.

“I just want to stop thinking about it,” she murmured, “I’ll go crazy if one more person tells me what happened wasn’t real. Or it wasn’t possible.” She ran a hand across her face, trying to clear her thoughts.

He broke contact from her, stepping away fully. She took an unconscious step forward as if to stay close to his warmth but her steps were too small and his too big.

She looked him up and down – she couldn’t help admiring him.

Except…

“Your leathers are completely ruined.” She exhaled.

They were bad enough before, tattered and old, now he may as well be wearing nothing for all the good they’d do. Eleana could see the distinctive line of where she had misted them – so close to him, so close to his skin.

“They’ll do for now. I’m saving to get a new pair, and I think one of the lads might sell me a set second hand.” He was so earnest it killed her.

“I can’t let you spend your money when I was the one who destroyed them beyond use. I’ll get you new ones – have them tailored to you and everything.”

“I can’t accept that, it’s too generous.”

“Oh stop. I have endless funds-”

“It’s not necessary. Thank you for the offer though, Eleana.”

“What if I give you an old pair? Not mine, although I would pay good money to see a sight like that, but one of Felix’s.”

“You can’t just give away his things-” He started,

“Sure I can.” She finished.

“ _Eleana_ ,” Kaden argued.

“It’s settled then. Want to come by his house after you’ve finished here and grab them?”

He looked pained.

“I have nothing to give you in return.” He admitted. “My entire wage goes towards something else, what I do have is so small…”

She stepped in close to him and placed her hands on his chest.

“That doesn’t matter, and to me it never will. Come by the house and we’ll sort it out. I don’t need any form of payment. Your gratitude is enough.” She joked.

He looked at her hands on his chest and made a very purposeful step away from her.

So it was back to no touching. Eleana tried not to show how much that hurt her on in her expression.

She couldn’t help it though – the way her face fell and her body went cold. She avoided looking at him after that, casting her glances at the ground rather than at him.

She didn’t want him to see – didn’t want to make him feel guilty. That was the last thing she wanted to do. She really had to stop throwing herself at him but _fuck_ if not even her mate accepted her advances what did that say about her?

“I’m – I’m going to go, but I was serious. If you don’t come I’ll just have them delivered to you.”

Without bidding him a proper goodbye she spun on her heels and walked away as quickly as she could.

“Eleana!” He called after her.

She stopped but didn’t turn around.

She didn’t expect him to suddenly be at her side but there he was with a hand on her shoulder.

“There’s this, uh,” he said nervously, “Some guys are having a bonfire tonight. There’ll be dancing and drinking. Would you, um, if you’re free, maybe, if you want to you could, uh, come with me? Would you like to come with me?” He stuttered.

She looked at him with his hopeful smile and nervous jitter.

“I must warn you I’m a terrible dancer.” Was her answer.

“Good thing I’m an immaculate one then.”

 

_____

 

Kaden approached Felix’s house at dusk.

He still didn’t know whether it was a mistake inviting her to the bonfire. He wanted her to come, desperately so, but the lines were so blurred between them already. He didn’t want to lead her on. He knew what she wanted from him - he could smell it whenever she was in the room. He could smell her lust for him.

That’s not what he wanted from her though.

He wanted them to have a professional relationship or a friendship. He did not want to be anything else for her, and he didn’t want her to be like that for him either.

Oh who is he kidding? He wanted to spend every minute of every day with her. Trying to make her smile trying to make her laugh. _Mother_ , he loved her laugh. It didn’t matter what he wanted though. Didn’t matter how much he wanted her. Nothing would change the fact that he had no right to have these thoughts about her. Not only was he a bastard born Illyrian, oh no, he was also a half breed. It’s literally the perfect combination if you want to have your ass beat your entire life.

Eleana is this striking, remarkable, independent, strong woman and he didn’t deserve someone like her. For fucks sake he can’t even afford to buy clothing let alone shower her with everything that _she_ deserved.

All his thoughts of doubt though cleared when he saw her waiting on the veranda, leaning against the balustrade. She was wearing a flowy white top that barely cleared the bottom of her breasts and exposed her collarbones and shoulders. Her pants were the same colour and style except they were cuffed at the hems and sat on her navel. Her hair was hung in long waves and she had light coal on her eyes.

She wasn’t looking at him but she was all he could look at.

Eventually she noticed his stare and rather than blanching at his blatant admiration gave him a beaming smile.

“Ready to go?” He asked.

She nodded and jumped over the balustrade, landing lightly. Her wings were nowhere to be seen and the fae-ness of her was screaming at him.

“Is my outfit alright?” She queried as she came to stand next to him.

“Huh?” He was so dumbstruck by her beauty to form a proper response.

“Is it appropriate? I wasn’t sure what to wear. I’ve never been to something like this.”

Kaden had been to a few and the girls there had been dressed in a number of things, most much more scantily clad then this.

“It’s perfect,” He told her, “but won’t you be cold?”

The winter air was chill and bitter. It wasn’t raining nor was it all that windy, but the light breeze was enough to cover Kaden’s arms in goosebumps.

“I’ll have you to keep me warm,” She lightly bumped his back.

They started walking towards where the fire would be held. It was going to be quite deep within the woods so that they could be as loud as they wanted and drink without causing too much mayhem. The sun set quickly and as they made their way they were soon shrouded in darkness.

They walked in a peaceful silence until it was broken by the sounds of fiddles and drums.

Eleana brightened in excitement and started to walk faster, nearly skipping. She was swinging her arms and humming to the faint music. Kaden followed her as the sounds beckoned them.

They entered a clearing together and were welcomed by cheerful music and people freely dancing. Tall, hanging trees surrounded the circular clearing, blocking out any light from the moon. The musicians, a miss match bunch of Illyrians, were tucked in the far left corner merrily playing their instruments. Opposite them were a few tables and chairs surrounding a keg and bucket full of other beverages for anyone to take as they pleased. The fire was roaring in the middle.

He turned to see her reaction and she was awestruck.

“It’s like a tiny piece of Velaris.” She marvelled.

“Would you like a drink?”

“I would love one.”

Before Kaden could turn to oblige her an Illyrian from his squad came to greet them.

“Kaden! And the _lovely_ Lady Eleana,” He was over dramatic and very clearly intoxicated already. Kaden supposed he should let him have his fun. He did help his story with the High Lord and General earlier.

He grabbed Eleana’s hand and pressed a lingering, slobbery kiss to it. “The Lady Eleana, I am Jonas and here to fulfil your every whim.”

She pulled her hand back – as politely as she could – and discreetly wiped it the tree behind them.

“But what are you doing so covered up, Kaden? Always so conservative.” Jonas tsked.

Kaden was indeed the only Illyrian male with a shirt on in the whole clearing.

“You have me there, Jonas.” Not wanting to look frigid in front of Eleana he drew his blue shirt over his head and wings and threw it in the space between two trees.

 

_____

 

Eleana ogled at the sight in front of her.

Holy hot damn Kaden was a sight to see. Defined abdomen and beautifully tanned skin – she had a hard time not falling over at the sight. She also now knew that his biggest scar wasn’t the one on his bicep, but perhaps the one slashed diagonally across his pectoral.

The other man in front of her, Jonas, was the guy next to Kaden this morning who had spoken to her father and uncle.

Next to Kaden he wasn’t much, but she was sure he would make some female very happy. That’s if he managed to stop staring at her.

She probably shouldn’t judge considering she was doing the exact same thing towards Kaden.

The music suddenly got considerably louder and more upbeat, distracting Eleana and bringing her back to reality.

“Ah, much better young Kaden. Now what is such a pretty lady doing by sullying herself with you? Why don’t you dance with me, Eleana? I’ll show you what a real Illyrian can do.”

She scrunched her nose in disgust and snatched back her hand when he tried to take it again. He gave her a flirtatious wink and waggled his eyebrows at her and she had to physically restrain herself from gagging.

What an arsehole.

“It’s _Lady_ Eleana.” She corrected him, “and I already have a man to dance with. I don’t need a boy.”

She left him there dumbfounded and confused and dragged Kaden away after linking their arms.

“What a joke, is he always like this?”

“I would say eight out of ten times, yes.”

His face was a deep red – he was obviously embarrassed.

“Kaden?”

“Hmm?”

“Will you dance with me?”

He smiled gently at her, “of course.”

She led them to the throng of dancers twirling around near the musicians and didn’t stop until they were in the middle of the pandemonium.

“Now when you said you couldn’t dance…” Kaden started,

“I wasn’t kidding. Seriously. I love dancing but somehow the coordination I have when fighting doesn’t follow through to a much else.”

He unlinked their arms and spun her around so that she was facing him. He stepped in close to her and placed his hands on her waist, his fingers just skimming her bare skin. She wasn’t entirely sure where to put her hands but he made it easy by laughing lightly and guiding them around his neck.

“Do you want to stand on my feet?” He asked.

“I don’t think that will be necessary.” She giggled.

Instead she moved closer to him, pressing their bodies together.

In response his arms wrapped tighter around her and rested his forehead against hers.

They danced like that for at least two hours. He _was_ a good dancer and obviously was barely showing what he could do by lagging her around. He didn’t seem to care though. Every time he twirled her to the beat of the music and she stepped on his feet he just laughed and spun them again. His wings were tucked tight into his body so he could whirl them around without fear of knocking anyone with them.

Eleana had never laughed so much in her life. At one stage he tried to teach her how to dance and it ended with them knocking into another couple and spilling the couple’s drink. They apologized profusely through their laughs but weren’t quite taken seriously and received glowering looks in return.

That’s when they retreated to get drinks.

Eleana sat at one of the tables that had been set up, a gritty timber that went perfectly with the forest environment, and waited for Kaden who was getting them something from whatever was in the keg.

He came over to her, sweat slightly coating his chest from their dancing and the proximity to the fire and handed her a glass.

She lifted it to take a sip and coughed at the smell.

“Is this Pepper Whiskey?” She sniggered.

“I definitely should not have a whole glass of this,” he gave his very full glass a pointed stare, “Oh well.” He shrugged his shoulders and in one take chugged the whole glass.

Eleana cackled at his antics and did the same.

Eleana could definitely hold her alcohol but the problem with Pepper Whiskey is it is the strongest alcohol you could buy and it wasn’t recommended to have more than a shot or so. Eleana was feeling young and loose and reckless though.

“How is Felix baring?” Kaden asked, setting his empty glass on the table between them.

Eleana was already starting to feel the buzz from the whiskey.

“I checked on him again at lunch. They’ve moved him to his own house so he’s much happier now, and when I left to wait for you he was using toy blocks to build things with Quathryn. He seems happier than before, so pretty much more like his normal overbearing self.”

Kaden scooted his chair closer to hers.

“You mentioned before that Nesta was pregnant again? That must be exciting.”

Eleana brushed her fingers against his, willing him to take her hand. They may have just been dancing without an inch between them but she knew that he was different when it came to how much and when he wanted to touch her.

“I am excited. I love babies and could never say no to wanting more cousins.”

“What about siblings?”

“I’m sure I’ll have some eventually, my mother and father are way to ridiculously in love to stop at one child and I’d like one. Maybe a little brother? I wouldn’t mind a sister but I think my parents would love a boy. What about you? Do you have a big family?” She probed. Eleana wanted to know as much about her mate as she could. She wanted their relationship to be built like that, like her parents was, rather than just on the fact that they had a bond, like her grandparents. One was the perfect love story, the other more of a mutual understanding.

“I have too many cousins to count – so many that I actually haven’t met them all. There’s also a pretty big age gap between me and my brothers so they have some of their own children as well. I had a sister but she passed away before I was born.”

“I’m sorry, Kaden.” She meant it to. Sorry for Kaden but also sorry for the woman who would never know her wonderful brother.

“It’s alright. When I say the age gap is big I’m not exaggerating. My closest sibling in age to me is still over a century older. Most of my six brothers fought in the war, and that’s when my sister died.”

He finally took her hand in his.

“You’re so small,” he lightly chortled.

“Everyone is small next to you. It’s not my fault you’re gargantuan.”

“HA! Kaden the Gargantuan. I rather like that title.”

“You’ll fit in well with me and Felix then. Our family is all about ridiculous titles. Death Incarnate and Light Exultant. My parents are so matchy matchy.”

“My personal favourite is Nesta the Beheader. It’s just so… vivid.”

Eleana snorted at his description of her aunt. She had forgotten that she had earned that nickname during the war.

Eleana leaned her head on his shoulder and looked up at him.

“Dance with me again?”

“How can I resist your skill and talent?” He fondly teased.

When they came to stand in front of the musicians again their tune had changed to a slow sultry one.

Kaden wrapped his arms around her like he had before but Eleana – perhaps because of the alcohol, perhaps because of his warmth, perhaps because she was feeling particularly brave – slid her arms under his wings to wrap around his torso rather than around his neck.

He shivered at the feeling of her skin touching one of his most sensitive parts but didn’t push her away. Actually, what he did warmed her to the core.

Ever so slightly Kaden pressed a barely-there kiss to her neck, right over the vein. He could probably feel how hard her heart was beating and her face tinged pink at the thought.

She started to move her hands, grazing his wings and back. He arched at the touch and his breath hitched.

His wings were silken and enthralling to touch, but his back…

“What’s on your back, Kaden?” She questioned.

“It’s nothing,” he whispered, pressing another kiss to her neck, this one much more firm.

“It’s not nothing – show me.” Eleana drunkenly demanded.

He shook his head and broke contact with her, shoving her to arms-length.

Normally it wouldn’t have been an issue, a push like that like a fly landing on her face (small but noticeable), but because of the alcohol in her system she stumbled back and nearly fell.

He rushed forward to steady her.

“Oh my – Eleana I’m so sorry, I can’t believe I just did that. I’m so, so sorry. I just didn’t want you to see. I was ashamed – please forgive me. _I’m so sorry I’m so sorry I’m so sorry_ ,”

A few people around them had stopped to watch the spectacle. It was no secret that she was the High Lady’s daughter and she could see some of them preparing to take Kaden down. In their eyes this bastard born had just attacked the Heir.

Eleana only giggled.

“I’m so clumsy,” She chuckled, “come and make it up to me.”

She walked – stumbled – away and Kaden dutifully followed her.

Her statement seemed to defuse some of the tension and what it didn’t soon was by her adding her blue and green flames to the bonfire. Illyrians ooed and ahhed and soon no one was looking at them as they left the clearing.

“ _Eleana, I’m so sorry_ ,”

“Stop apologizing, Kaden. It’s not like you did it out of malice. I crossed a line and you had every right to push me away. I should be the one saying sorry.” She said solemnly.

She stopped walking once they were within hearing range of the music, but far enough away so that no one could hear or see them speaking.

“I pushed you, it’s unforgivable-”

“If it had been a male who made you so uncomfortable you would have done the same thing and no one would’ve batted an eyelash. You aren’t at fault here, Kaden. So please stop.”

He looked at her, fraught with pain.

“It’s something my brother’s would have done - lay a hand on a woman. It was something I swore I would never do.”

“What’s wrong with your back, Kaden?”

She stood still, waiting to see his reaction.

He didn’t say anything - he just turned around and extended his wings so she could see the whole of his back.

“I know – I know it’s disgusting, and I didn’t want your opinion of me to change.”

It was clear what had happened.

His back had been whipped to shreds, the wounds recent. They can’t have happened any more than two months ago and since his immortal blood had yet to fully heal them Eleana suspected the whip was made of leather and ash wood.

His whole back was covered with the scar tissue, not a single inch left untouched.

“Who did this to you?” She whispered, voice full of total and utter horror.

“It’s the reason I left the camp I was raised in. My brothers were never kind to me - it was never truly my home or my family. As soon as I was able to leave I did, but there is six of them, it took me a long time.” He was still facing away from her, head hung low.

“Your brothers did this?” Tears streamed down her face at thought of him being hurt. They quickly turned to tears of blinding anger.

She walked until she was as close to him as she could be without pressing herself against him. This appalling sight had sobered her up better than any other remedy. She lightly touched the scars with her fingers.

“Do you think less of me, Eleana?” She hated the vulnerability in his voice.

“ _Of course not_. You were one male against six. This is not your fault and you have no reason to be ashamed of yourself.”

She leaned forward and kissed the space between his wings.

“All your scars tell a story, Kaden, a beautiful, wondrous story about a boy who grew up in the dark and yet turned into this brilliant male. Someone who is so _caring_ and so _compassionate_. I am proud to call you my friend, and I’m happy that I’ve had the privilege to know you.”

He turned around to face her and she reached up to trace the scar across his face. He nuzzled into her hand.

“I’ll kill them.” She stated. It was a fact. If she ever met his brothers what she did to the Impeath would look like a mere trick meant to entertain a child. If she ever met his brothers she would have no problem staying in control.

“I hope you never have to lay eyes on them – not because they don’t deserve that fate but because it would kill me for you to be anywhere near them. I don’t know what it is about you, how I could possibly feel this way in such a short time… Nevertheless I haven’t felt it before. I don’t care how long I’ve known you.”

He linked his hands with hers and moved them so they were once again around his neck. He then ran his hands down her arms, down her body, until they rested on her lower back.

His breathing became heavy and she shuddered in anticipation.

First he kissed her forehead, then her cheek, then the tip of her nose, then the corner of her mouth.

He was a breath away from her mouth when they heard a very loud rustling in the bushes.

Eleana groaned in frustration and looked to see if there was anybody snooping on them.

All she saw was a threadbare cloak retreating. It wouldn’t have out her on edge if whoever it was were running or walking, but this _thing_ seemed to be levitating.

“What the fuck?” Kaden shared her views.

 

_____

 

They walked together to see what it was doing, Kaden keeping a hand on Eleana’s back as she led the way.

She approached the bushes where the noises were coming from and dropped to her knees.

Kaden watched her as she dug around, trying to decipher what it was.

“Oh!” She exclaimed.

She reached further into the foliage, straining to reach something. She let out a huff of frustration and put her whole upper body forward so she could go further.

“Do need me to-”

“Got them!”

She pulled back with a triumphant huff and held up two matching crowns.

They were exquisite. The frames were some kind of black stone, woven like Illyrian tattoos. Throughout the crown in varying versions were stars made of multi-coloured speckled opal. Kaden had seen this opal before – he had seen it in the arrows left for Eleana the day before.

The crowns matched but they weren’t the same. They were clearly intended for two different people.

“They’re beautiful,” Eleana was still crouching on the ground.

“Do you always get two?”

“No.” She shook her head. “I think they were just feeling generous today.”

She stood and placed the more feminine crown on her head. It fit perfectly.

 

_____

 

Not that Eleana would tell him but she knew full well why they had left her two crowns.

Over the years they had linked certain types of gifts to particular creatures. Knives from the Elves, arrows from the Little Folk, daggers from the Centaurs…

“One for me,” she said as Kaden admired the crown atop her head, “and one for you.”

He looked shocked as she placed the second crown on his blond head. Just as hers did, it fit perfectly to him.

Yes, Eleana knew why she had gotten two crowns. One for her, and one for her mate.

She had received a crown from the forest only once before in her life and she knew these ones were from the exact same thing.

It seemed the Suriel had a message for her.


	6. Chapter 6

The night was over and dawn was approaching by the time Kaden and Eleana stumbled home from their night of dancing.

They were both giggling fools from the whiskey. The crowns adorning their heads were crooked and the only thing that had stopped Eleana from falling over every five feet was Kaden’s strong form at her side.

She looked at him as they approached the road that split into the two different directions they would be taking to get home. His cheeks were stained pink from the bitter cold and he had a wide smile plastered on his face. His arm was steadily around her waist as they both walked away from the precious moments they had shared at the bonfire.

They hadn’t kissed, not in a way that mattered, but Eleana didn’t mind. She would wait years if she had to – years because all she wanted to do was kiss this man in front of her.

“It seems this is where we are going to part.” He cut through their laughs.

He was right. From here you could see her house and if you looked in the opposite direction you would see the path that took you to the tents.

“I had a lovely – I have had a lovely night, Kaden.” She slurred.

After she had found their crowns and convinced Kaden to keep the one intended for him they danced for a while away from everybody else. He held her close and she touched his wings and ran her hands down his marred back but eventually they once again joined the merry group of Illyrians dancing the night away. They had more to drink, as unwise as it might’ve been, and twirled around until their laughter was as loud as the music and they had forgotten their own names.

Eleana didn’t want it to be over.

Kaden leaned down and pressed a sweet kiss to her cheek and bid her farewell. He walked backwards away from her – he wanted to see that she got home safely – and she waved from her doorstep until he was out of eyeshot.

She stayed leaning against the door. That was until her father opened it and she went tumbling down.

She cackled from their entry way and looked up at her father.

“Helllooooo!” She chirped.

“Eleana! Where have you been?”

Rhys crouched down and picked his daughter up off the ground.

“Nowhere, everywhere, I am transcendent.” She answered him with a drunken giggle.

Rhys rolled his eyes and held onto her as he dragged her inside and out of the cold. He had no idea where she had gotten an outfit like _that_ but it certainly wasn’t appropriate in weather like this.

Feyre stood as they entered. She had been reading on the couch while Rhys napped with his head in her lap. They had been waiting for their daughter, who said she would be back at _midnight_ , to come home.

They had expected her to be late, Eleana wasn’t someone who dealt well with time constraints, but they didn’t think she would come home blink drunk.

Eleana squealed in delight at the sight of Feyre and pushed away from Rhys so she could hug her mother. “Welcome back!”

Feyre sighed at her daughter and wrapped her arms around her. That’s when she smelt the overpowering scent of Pepper Whiskey.

“Oh Eleana. Rhys, you might want to get a bucket.” Feyre nodded towards her mate.

Feyre knew first-hand the effects Pepper Whiskey could have on someone and from the look and smell of it Eleana had drunk quite a bit.

“No, no, no, no, no!” Eleana shook her head and gestured frantically until Rhys was at her side.

He looked concerned until she pulled him into a hug as well, and then made him put his arms around her and Feyre.

“Look at us, a happy little family.” She rested her head on Rhys’s shoulder and closed her eyes, content to just go to sleep then and there.

_____

Eleana was never going to drink again, the pain wasn’t worth it.

She had been awake since the crack of dawn and even though it was now evening she had yet to stop sweating and vomiting her guts up. She couldn’t go anywhere near food and Eleana believed it was likely the only reason she was still alive was because of her parents dutifully looking after her.

She was so embarrassed about her actions. When he father had told her about what she had done the previous night she could’ve died from the shame. It’s one thing to get pissed beyond comprehension but another to do it in front of your parents.

“Are you feeling any better?” Her father and mother stood in her doorway. The latter was the person to ask but at this point it didn’t really matter. Her vision was still blurry enough that they blended into the same person.

It was a miracle she had been able to walk home last night. An even bigger miracle that she could remember it.

“Will it be over soon?” Eleana whimpered.

Feyre looked at her daughter sympathetically and came over to her bedside to sit. She summoned a damp cloth from nowhere and pressed it against her burning forehead.

“Do I even want to know what you got up to last night?” Rhys sighed.

“Probably not,” Eleana answered honestly.

“Are you going to ever explain the crown or are your mother and I expected to simply guess?”

Eleana pouted at him and turned away to burrow back into her blankets. Somehow, and she truly didn’t understand why, her body couldn’t decide if it was burning hot or freezing cold.

Right now it was cold.

“I found it in the forest last night, I don’t know why that would be at all surprising.” Her crown now rested on the bedside table furthest from her. It was still shiny and impeccable and she loved it. She also loved that it had a twin now residing with her mate.

“Eleana…” Her father approached her and crouched down next to her bed and Feyre. He rested a hand on her shoulder and gently pulled her until she was facing them again. He was at eye level with her, and the look of trepidation in his eyes made her worried.

“I have to leave tomorrow morning-”

“But you’ve only been here three days,” Eleana interrupted.

She looked between her parents frantically.

He had said he would stay as long as he could. Three days is barely a visit.

“I know but I have to tend to some business in Velaris. I wanted to tell you this morning but because you’re so sick the opportunity didn’t arise.” He explained.

“What is there to do in Velaris? Mor’s gone back and she practically runs the place anyway-”

“Which is getting increasingly difficult to do with Amren away. You know I wouldn’t leave you if I didn’t have to.”

So much for missing her as much as she missed him.

Eleana rolled over so that she was facing away from her parents again.

“Okay. Have fun in Velaris.”

“Please don’t be like this, Laya,” Her mother tried to say.

Without warning Eleana jumped up and out of bed, ignoring the dizziness that came with the action.

Luckily she was already wearing clothing and not pyjamas, thankfully not the same outfit from last night, and stalked out of her bedroom and down the stairs.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Rhys demanded as he followed her down the stairs. Damn, it was like a repeat of the previous day.

“I have stuff I need to do and I can’t do it if I’m in bed.” If he wanted to be repetitive so could she.

It was only yesterday that he had assured her that they would spend more time together, that she was his first priority. What bullshit. He couldn’t even spend a week with her.

“There’s nothing you can accomplish at this time of night, Laya. It’s sundown, what do you expect to possibly get done?” Rhys questioned.

Eleana was so sick of fighting with him. It almost made her miss the days when he wasn’t here.

“Times have changed since you lived here – people don’t stop just because the sun goes down. Some people like the night, prefer it even. Hey, wouldn’t it be great if there was a whole city for people who loved the night time? Maybe you should check it out. What a marvellous idea it is.” Eleana snapped at him.

She went to do the door and pulled on her boots. It was snowing outside, small patters of the white fluff.

“Don’t you dare take one step out that door, Eleana. It’s our last night together before your father leaves and we’re spending it together.” Feyre ordered.

Her mother didn’t often take that tone with her, and Eleana didn’t often care when she did.

Eleana couldn’t help the feelings of betrayal coursing through her.

“We’ve spent seven years not being a proper family, I’m sure we can last another night.”

“Eleana!” Feyre yelled, “Do not step foot outside this house, understood? If you want to have an attitude you can deal with the consequences.”

Eleana stood and glared at her parents.

“Fine, I won’t take a step outside this house.”

Eleana winnowed instead.

_____

One, two, three, four.

Deep breaths, be calm, and all will be well.

With another kick to the abdomen the Illyrian male Eleana was sparring against was down, and he wouldn’t be getting up any time soon.

“Next,” she huffed.

Another Illyrian, this time female, stepped in front of her. All it took was six blows from Eleana and she was down as well.

“Another. Make it hard this time.”

Her trainer Alixia shook her head but gestured another male forward. She knew better than to contradict the Heir while she was in a mood like this and it was good practise for the other Illyrians training.

If Eleana kept pummelling them at this rate though soon no one would be left to fight her.

“Do I even want to know why you’re so competitive today?” Alixia asked her.

“I just haven’t sparred in a few days.” Eleana lied.

Truthfully she just wanted to clear her head and there wasn’t anywhere she could go at this time of night to start spewing her magic. It also turned out fighting through a hangover while upset was a miracle cure. Eleana could fight for hours to come.

Another male approached her – maybe this one would be a challenge.

Doubtful.

Even while dizzy Eleana was significantly better than any of the people here. It’s not that she’s arrogant, it’s just that she can admit that she is privileged enough to have been trained by the best, most respected warriors in Prythian. For fucks sake, she was only two when her father and mother taught her how to use a hunting knife. There’s also the influence Cassian and Azriel had on her education. And of course there was also Felix, who had always excelled in not only everything he tried his hand at but also had a natural ability to lead and teach.

Usually when she was upset about something the first person she would go to was her mother. Since that wasn’t an option in this case the next best thing would be her eldest cousin.

But he was still under lock and key with Cassian and Nesta.

Eleana signed inwardly and raised her arms in a defensive motion. This Illyrian looked like he was going to put up one hell of a fight.

“Eleana?” A smooth voice asked from behind her.

She looked, knowing who it was and desperate to see the male that matched the voice, and was rewarded with a right hook smashed against her face.

Fuck, she was still in a fight. She would have to finish this male off quickly.

He was cocky, and she suddenly realised that it was Jonas. The putrid male she had met the night before. What was he doing here if he was part of Felix’s Elite?

He went for her again – fists swinging, but she was ready this time.

She easily dodged his attacks, even the roundhouse kicks he started to use when he got impatient with his fists.

He bared his teeth at her and she snarled right back.

Eleana took the offensive after successfully avoiding another of his attacks. When he swung his arm to punch her again she dodged to the outside, grabbing his forearm and crashing her elbow into his face. She then took no time in flipping him over so that he was back down on the ground. He made to jump up again but with three kicks – one to the ribs, one to the face, and one straight to the groin – he was done.

She hummed in satisfaction at the sight of him groaning in pain in the mud and turned to face the voice that called to her.

Kaden looked as fresh as spring – no sign of any effects of the whiskey they had binged the night before.

She felt some of the sadness lift from her at the sight of him.

“Shit, Eleana.”

He stalked up to her and placed his hands gently under her chin to inspect where she had been punched. He clicked his tongue at what he saw and didn’t ask her before he healed her injuries with his fae magic.

“Thank you,” She smiled at him.

“Not a problem. How are you faring after last night?” He queried.

Eleana snorted and grabbed one of his hands. With the other she waved a quick goodbye to Alixia and walked away, dragging Kaden with her.

He easily fell into step beside her and dropped her hand.

So today was a no touching day.

“This morning I thought I was going to die, but turns out all I needed was a little fresh air. I feel better having been out of the house for the past hour or so then I have from being holed up in bed all day. What about you? You look the way I want to feel.” She finally answered his question.

He snorted at her answer and sent a grin her way. “I went out last night knowing that training for today had been cancelled. As for fresh air to make you feel better… well there’s no doubt I get plenty of that.”

Eleana knew he was referring to the tent he lived in.

“Have you ever thought about living in one of the communal houses? They were set up so that no one had to live in those tents anymore.” Eleana suggested.

It was still snowing, it would likely only get heavier as the night wore on, and the thought of Kaden staying in nothing but a tent…

It was completely possible that he could freeze to death.

“Those houses are for the younglings. I’m perfectly content where I am.”

Eleana decided against arguing with him, and rather changed the subject.

“I don’t know if I thanked you for last night, I really did have a great time. Especially since your talent with dancing is enough to cancel out the fact that I’m atrocious at it.” She joked. “It takes a lot of skill to make me seem like an adequate dancer.”

“You weren’t that bad.”

Eleana gave him a Look.

“Okay, you were terrible. But not unredeemable! I will make it my life’s goal to see you dance without nearly killing somebody and luckily for us we have all the time in the world.”

Eleana was tempted to try and hold his hand again. The way he was talking to her now was like the way he talked to her yesterday.

“What brings you around here anyway? You mentioned you had the day off? I thought Cassian and my father were going to inspect you today.”

“Oh they did. Felix sent me a message yesterday afternoon saying he didn’t want me to go. He outlined perfectly valid reasons so I agreed. One of them was that not having to deal with his father when he was in ‘child protection mode’ was my reward for helping with the Impeath. He knows I also had a bit of a rough day yesterday and took pity on me, not that I want it.”

“What happened yesterday?”

“For starters I was deathly worried for you and Felix, especially after I felt your magic spiral and then just disappear. That was okay once I talked to you but…” He seemed to hesitate.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I’ll understand if it’s too private.”

He looked at her gratefully.

“I want to tell you,” he said anyway, “it just seems so stupid when I say it aloud.”

“I swear I won’t judge,” She promised.

They reached a small fire next to an intersection of paths and stopped. It was one of many scattered around the camp. They were intended to warm, but also to light paths.

“Yesterday I received a letter from my cousin. It was an invitation to her wedding. All the guests have been invited to Cesere and then to her husband-to-be’s mansion only a village over. I like my cousin, she’s one of the tolerable ones, but she said in the letter that if I decided to attend there wouldn’t be a room for me but I might be allowed to stay in the stable with the horses.”

“She doesn’t sound very tolerable.” Eleana felt indignant on his behalf.

He waved away her concerns and continued. “It likely had nothing to do with her. Her betrothed is as nasty as they come and it wouldn’t surprise me if my brothers had a hand in it too.”

Eleana turned so that she was fully facing him.

“That’s complete fuckery. You should be allowed to go and enjoy your cousins wedding with the same privileges as the other guests.”

He shrugged.

“At least she gave me a plus one. I imagine it’s so I don’t have to be alone in a barn all night. She’s always thought like that – made sure I wasn’t alone. When I was a small child and had to stay with her – a rare occasion – she always let me sleep on the floor next to her bed. It had carpet and everything. Most luxurious place I’ve ever slept in all honesty.”

“Never a bed?” Eleana was struggling to understand. If Kaden thought sleeping on carpet was a luxury how horrible was his life before he moved here?

“I’ve yet to try a bed, but one day I might be able to buy a cot.” Kaden extended his hands so that they were warming over the fire.

“You told me you sent the majority of your wage someone else, why?” It was ridiculous. As part of the Elite he earned more than an average foot soldier, and not only that but he was a highlight of the squadron. He should be able to save for a house, not a cot.

He looked down and deflated.

“That’s not a story I can tell quite yet,” he breathed.

Eleana saw how uncomfortable he was just thinking about it. His hands had bunched in front of him and his broad shoulders had tensed.

“That’s fine.” She would hate to make him linger on something that very obviously was a sore spot.

She reached out and ran a hand down his arm. She wanted to comfort him more but she knew not to get to close when he wasn’t in the mood to be touched.

“If I was to tell someone, I would tell you. I’m just not ready to think or talk about it.”

“That’s okay. So are you going to this wedding?” She changed the subject back to something he seemed comfortable talking about.

“Perhaps. I might go if I can find someone to come with me. I don’t want to be stranded in Cesere if things go to shit.”

“You should invite my mother to go with you,” Eleana joked, “if they see the High Lady is your guest then they’d have to give you a bedroom.”

Kaden smirked. “I think the High Lord might feel a little rattled if I steal his mate away.”

“What about Felix? Actually, you better not. He has a habit of seducing brides.”

Kaden looked at her with wide eyes.

“Are you serious?” He snorted.

“I guess you can’t call it a ‘habit’ if it’s only happened twice.”

Kaden laughed. “I can’t wait to ask him about this.”

He turned to look at her thoughtfully. The light snow had settled on his long lashes and his cheeks had flushed to a red.

“What about you?” He asked.

“Have I ever seduced a bride?”

“No, I meant if I asked you to come to the wedding with me would you?”

“I don’t know if my name would be as effective as my mothers,”

Eleana was still joking around but the prospect of doing something like that with Kaden… it seemed rather intimate. Not only that but he’d said this wedding was months away, meaning he was planning on keeping her around if he was asking her to attend with him.

“I wouldn’t want you there for your name, Elena. I’d want you there as my friend who I enjoy spending time with.” He looked at her hopefully, but one thing about his request had snagged her interest.

“Friend?”

His face fell and he looked at the ground guiltily.

“What I said last night…” _I don’t know what it is about you, how I could possibly feel this way in such a short time…_ “I wouldn’t have said that if I hadn’t drunk so much. I was lonely and – I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression.”

Suddenly the snow wasn’t the coldest thing.

“Oh – um – yeah. That’s, um, yeah that’s fine.” She stumbled.

Not only were his words false - she could tell from his awkward expression. He also regretted everything else, the kisses, how she touched his wings. She was utterly mortified.

“Eleana-”

“No, seriously. I mean we both drank a lot and did a lot of, um – stuff. So, yeah.” She was biting her bottom lip so hard the skin was about to break.

“I’m sorry, it would just never work.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, Kaden. Feelings aren’t something that can be controlled, whether they’re there or not.” She smiled at him, albeit sadly, and took a step away from him.

“Is that something you’re okay with – being friends?”

She looked him up and down.

Her mate. He was her mate.

 _And even he didn’t want her_.

“You could give me the barest scraps of attention and I would be happy. It may be your life goal to teach me to dance-”

A ghost of a smile on his lips.

“-but it is my goal to make sure you know that you are more than a bastard.”

His mouth pressed into a thin line, not an unhappy one, rather the one of a male deep in thought.

“The wedding is in the spring. This is me officially inviting you to come with me. If you want, I can even try to find a suit to match your dress.”

_Oh Cauldron please say yes, come with me come with me, I need you, I can’t face them on my own._

The thoughts – _his thoughts_ – hit her harder than the punch from Jonas.

The shock must’ve shown on her face because Kaden shied away.

“Yes,” She blurted, “I’ll come.”

Relief visibly overcame him. His tense shoulders sagged and the line between his furrowed brows disappeared.

“Will you really?”

“Yep, and you don’t even have to worry about finding something to wear. I happen to know lots of,” she gestured up and down his body, “large men. You’re about the same size as my Uncle Az and he by far has the best clothing.”

“Really? I thought it was your father who was known for being dressy.”

“Oh he was, then Az married Mor. The only reason his are the nicest is because she buys them for him.”

Kaden smiled her way, all the awkwardness gone for him.

Eleana hurt though. Between her father leaving so soon and Kaden rejecting her again… well, Eleana doubted that the ice that covered her heart would melt anytime soon. Because she wanted more than friendship, and she knew that it was never going to happen.

She could help but feel like there was something intrinsically wrong with her as a person. The only people that loved her were her relatives, and even then it was in small doses, she had never been able to hold down a relationship, even with the man who was meant to be her soul-bonded partner, and her only friend was her cousin.

Eleana realised for the first time how truly pathetic she is.

It didn’t matter that she had inherited her parent’s unnaturally good looks or extraordinary power. What was the point when no one wanted to be around you?

“I should go.” She told him.

“Heading home for the night?”

His question was innocent enough, but Eleana wasn’t sure how to answer. The more she thought the more a small plan starting forming in her mind. A plan to find answers with the biggest busy-body gossip in Prythian – more so than any fae.

“No, tonight I’m going to visit an old friend.”

_____

It was bitterly cold and Eleana wondered if she should just give up. She’d been waiting here an hour now – her best cloak as bait and her best snare beneath. She’d never caught the suriel before but she had seen if from a distance on multiple occasions.

She had winnowed far away from the camp and deep into the woods - close to the boarder of the Dawn Court - so as not so be disturbed.

It was pitch black by now. The only light was being provided by the small slithers of moonlight that made it through the thicket of leaves above her. The bitter wind was rustling the leaves and snow littered the ground. It had stopped recently, but its icy effects continued to chill Eleana to her bones. She was tempted to go get her cloak for herself and just leave. Her parents were bound to be furious with her though, and somehow at the memory of them made this frozen place seemed like a vacation.

She hoped it would come. Her father had never been successful in any of his many attempts but her mother had never failed. Luckily for Eleana it was her mother that had taught her how to make a snare.

She sighed, resigned to the fact that she may have to go home without finding out the truth when she heard a loud rustling coming from her left. Her gaze snapped in that direction and she crouched behind a log that was a few paces away from her. It was covered in moss and was slimier than a worm but at least it would hide her it the creature to her left wasn’t the suriel.

A black figure in a ragged cloak emerged from the darkness. It was so gaunt, so haunting. Eleana was grateful that its features were hidden by the darkness.

It was undoubtedly the suriel.

It neared the cloak and with spindly limbs and reached out to get it.

 _Snap_.

The sound of the snare trapping the suriel was the loudest noise in the forest since Eleana arrived and she hoped it didn’t wake any other deadly creatures of the night.

The suriel growled in frustration and Eleana took that as her cue to rise from behind the log.

The suriel seemed impossibly taller and nefarious this close and Eleana had a hard time accepting that this same monstrous creature gave her and her mate those beautiful crowns.

“Young Curse-breaker.” Its voice was otherworldly and sent chills up and down her spine.

“I have questions for you,” she said in way of greeting.

“One would assume so.”

The black hood on its cloak covered its face, which Eleana was grateful for. It was horrifying enough without having to look it in the eyes.

Did suriels even have eyes?

Eleana didn’t want to know.

“Is there something wrong with me?” She whispered the question.

“Your heart rate is higher than usual.”

Was that _sarcasm_?

“That’s not what I meant. I want to know why I can’t get close to people.”

Eleana heard more rustling from the woods. It sounded like something- or multiple somethings – running frantically around.

“Since your birth you have been fated for much more than your court anticipated. It is simply time for your destiny to come to fruition, Young Curse-breaker.” Its voice ricocheted.

“What fate? I’m not destined for anything. Does this have something to do with the gifts I receive from the forest?” This conversation was only creating more problems for Eleana.

“Ah, but you are. History is being written and you are a key player. The gifts you receive are a mere representation in this, for the problem facing Prythian has been growing in secret for many years now unbeknownst to even the most powerful of High Fae.”

“You aren’t answering my questions.” She said bluntly. “I’m grateful for your crown but it means nothing if its twin isn’t beside it.”

“You must have faith. Stay with your mate and this won’t end in peril.”

Eleana rolled her eyes.

Before she could respond the rustling from the distance turned to a blood curdling scream.

The suriel spun towards the sound, as did Eleana.

“Free me, now. It is not safe for you and I here. We must leave.” It demanded.

“I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what I want to fucking know. I’m desperate, okay? I need to know what’s wrong with me so I can fix it.”

“Stay with your mate and you will fare fine.”

“But my mate doesn’t want me!”

“LEAVE NOW, CURSE-BREAKER. FREE ME AND RUN HOME. FAR, FAR AWAY FROM THIS WRETCHED PLACE. THIS WAS NOT SOMETHING YOU WERE INTENDED TO SEE.” The suriel’s voice boomed through the silence and the screams became heart-wrenchingly louder.

Eleana had to go to them, she had to try to help.

Eleana focused her magic on the rope binding the suriel and it vanished.

It didn’t look back at her as it fled in the opposite direction to the screams.

Frustrated, Eleana started bolting to the shrieks.

She summoned a sword to her side and bow and arrows to her back. Her hangover was a distant memory at this point and anything that had been holding her back before wasn’t now. Her sight was focused, her balance was steady. She needed to be ready to face whatever was wondering the forest at this time of night.

As Eleana was sprinting the screams that were guiding her abruptly stopped. That’s when she noticed the rancid smell that was coating the air.

She ran faster – she had no idea what that smell meant but it couldn’t be anything good.

She throttled through two branches and nearly slipped when she found herself in a clearing. She looked around at the peculiarity of it. There shouldn’t be any natural clearing here and this was obviously the work of a person.

There was nothing but snow covered grass – no weeds, no flowers, not even a fallen leaf.

There were five faerie bodies strung up with vines though.

“Holy shit,” Eleana gasped.

Two of the bodies were adults and in similar shape.

Their skin was blue from the cold and their faces were set in a petrifying expression of fear. Their mouths were agape and their eyes were missing. Their hands were permanently stuck in claw like positions and they had been stripped of all clothing. Eleana would have to have a closer inspection to see if the female was similar to male in the final regard, and that was that his most private part had also been removed.

The other three bodies, the small, delicate bodies, were that of children.

They had been left in the same state as the adults with the exception that where the adults had black, bloody holes where their eyes had been, the children had unseasonable yellow flowers stuck to their eyelids. Their expression was also different. They looked at peace, like they were sleeping. Eleana hoped that meant their deaths were painless and easy, despite the almost decorative way they had been tied between trees.

Six tall trees all with a few feet between them held the bodies. Between two trees a body was hung up in the middle by both its arms, leaving the feet to dangle. This continued for all the bodies, all five gaps filled with a corpse.

Eleana had to cover her mouth with her shaking hands to keep from screaming.

She whimpered in horror though, especially when the smell of rotting meat intensified and she felt something breathe on the back of her neck.

She didn’t have time to react before she felt a stabbing pain in her lower back and a hard collision to the back of her head.

_____

“I can’t find her anywhere,” Rhys said as he entered Felix’s home.

The whole family was gathered in the yellow house. Nesta had stayed behind to take care of her daughter while all the others had gone to search for Eleana.

“I wouldn’t worry, Uncle Rhys. So she’s thrown a tantrum - she’ll show up when she gets hungry.”

Felix had nonchalantly splayed himself on the couch. He wasn’t at all worried about the whereabouts of his cousin. He had asked Alixia who had seen her only a few hours ago and said she was angry but fine, and then found Kaden in his tent – admiring a crown he got from Mother know’s where – who told him he spoke to Eleana and they had parted ways with her going to see another friend.

His cousin was just trying to distract herself from whatever was bothering her this time.

“Rhys, I don’t like this.” Feyre expressed to her mate.

Rhys nodded in grim understanding and embraced her.

“We’re probably worried about nothing.” He reassured her.

“She’ll show up drunk again in the small hours of the morning, bet you anything.” Felix said to no one in particular. “Actually, if I win I want a-”

He was interrupted by a timid knock at the door, just loud enough for everyone to hear.

Rhys raised an eyebrow in question and opened the door to find a small child shivering in the cold carrying a wooden box.

“Yes?”

“Sorry t’ botha ye High Lord, but I was told to give this to ye. I was told I cunna be late and it was impor’an’.”

Felix recognized the boy from one of his Aunt Feyre’s bastard houses. His name was on the tip of Felix’s tongue but he couldn’t quite remember what it was. It was bad of him considering for the past decade he had been going to the houses to tutor the children, with the recent addition of Kaden to help.

Rhys took the box from the boy and rumpled his hair in thanks.

“Thank you. Now be on your way before you freeze. There’s a storm coming.”

The boy eagerly nodded and took off. He was practically skipping at the praise of his High Lord.

Rhys smiled faintly at the sight of the young boy before turning and kicking the door shut with his foot.

“What’s in the box?” Asked his father.

“I have no idea, it’s probably from Devlon and he was just too lazy to deliver it himself. I’ll tend to it in the morning before I go back to Velaris.” Rhys said while placing the box aside.

“You may as well open it now, it’s not like we have anything else to do.” Nesta piqued in.

Feyre hummed in agreement and took the box from where Rhys had left it.

It was wrapped in a neat bow, Lord Devlon must’ve been feeling particularly festive this evening, so Feyre unwound that before opening it.

When she did she let out a heartbreaking cry and dropped the box.

“What the fuck? What is it?”

Rhys stormed over to the box and looked in it. He then proceeded to vomit on Felix’s floor.

Felix and his parents jumped up and hurried towards the box, eager to see what had made Feyre and Rhys react in such a sudden and awful way.

When Felix saw it he gagged.

Inside the box, about the size of his hand, was a piece of membrane from an Illyrian wing. Next to it was not one but both the claws that graced the curve of wings. Lastly was an elegantly tied bunch of blue-black hair.

Felix started hyperventilating at the sight and whole body shook when Rhys blasted out his power in a huge wave – a wave that meant he was calling on all the squadrons of this camp as well as the next closest two.

Because it was obvious to everyone that the contents of this box came from Laya.


	7. Chapter 7

Eleana could feel it. She could feel her traitorous heart pumping the poison through her veins. She could feel it as she was dragged away. She could feel it as the thing hung her up like it did to those faeries. She could feel it as it decimated her wings, her precious wings, and heard its sinister snickers as it arranged them neatly into a box with a lock of her hair.

She wondered if somewhere the eyes of those faeries were in a box.

She could feel her breath become shallow. Could feel the twitch of her muscles as they started to spasm. Feel her toes barely graze the floor. Feel the cold breeze.

Eleana could feel everything.

But not once did she _see_ the creature that was hurting her.

______

Kaden woke for two reasons.

The first was the sense of pure terror that coated his mind. The second was the very distinctive wave of summons from the High Lord to every Illyrian, and a second wave that immediately followed from Felix to summon the Elite.

Kaden had never dressed and gotten armed so quickly in his life and flew at top speed to the emergency meeting point for the Elite. We wasn’t the first one there, but he was close to it. It only took seconds for the rest of his squadron to arrive.

They all met at the edge of the camp. On one side of them stood a market district and in the other side was the looming forest. The reason they trained here was because it was open enough for them to train their tremendous power without restraint but also wasn’t completely shut out from civilisation. Lord Devlon liked people seeing the Elite train, he said it gave them something to aspire to.

They were all arranged in their predetermined rows with straight backs and gazes forward – waiting for Felix to arrive and give them their orders. The rows were divided into a ranking system. The further you were to the front, the higher your position. If you were at the head of a column you were a group leader within the squad in the case that they were separated and used as separate units. There were ten rows and five columns. Felix rearranged the positions that people stood in depending on what he felt their skill level was. The Illyrians in the first row had been there from the creation of the Elite, some centuries old.

Kaden was in the second row.

Illyrians were rushing all around them, but none were as fast as the Elite. It was clear to everyone that there was something big happening – something disastrous. The wave sent by the High Lord was powerful enough to not only summon the warriors in their camp but also the ones huge distances away. Whatever was happening was urgent.

Kaden had a sickening feeling it had to do with the prickling under his skin and the dread that he felt.

“ _Attention_!” Felix appeared at the front of them, fully armed with - _holy shit was that eight?_ – siphons adorning his armour. Last time Kaden had seen Felix with his siphons he had only been wearing five. Kaden realised that five siphons is what Felix needed to wear to stay in control when he wasn’t even fighting.

In his arm he held a wooden box.

“The Heir has been stolen and tortured. By rows you will assess the scent from this box and track it until you find her. And you _will_ find her. Cauldron be damned if anyone else does before you.”

Felix’s voiced boomed over them all. Around them, other Illyrians were still getting ready to take order, and it would be only moments before the Elite were ready to go.

Felix’s voice was powerful, it demanded attention, and when Kaden looked at him he didn’t see his twenty-four year old friend, but a millennia old powerhouse sent straight from the darkness.

He waved forward the first row of Illyrians to scent what was in the box. All looked ruffled at the sight, some visibly blanching away from whatever was in it. Whatever was in that box must be bad if the top Illyrians in the camp blanched when they were trained not to show emotion.

It wasn’t until Kaden was called forward that he really processed Felix’s words.

_The heir was been stolen and tortured._

Eleana was _gone_. In that box was something of Eleana’s that smelt so strongly of her that no matter how many Illyrians tainted it with their scent it would still reek with hers.

There had to have been a mistake, he only saw her hours ago. A wave of unadulterated panic hit him.

It was his turn to see inside the box.

He gagged at the sight and stepped back immediately. _Her wings. Oh cauldron, her wings._

Kaden went back to his place and tried not to start hyperventilating.

Eleana’s favourite thing to do was fly, and there was no way someone, even someone as talented as her, would be able to go anywhere if their wings were missing such large… chunks? Pieces? There was no way that Kaden could describe it when the membrane inside that box belonged to his friend.

As he was lost in his thoughts another male joined Felix at his side. It was rare for Felix to let another Illyrian lead or order them, but this male was the exception. It was obvious why. He was not quite as tall as Felix but was just as imposing. He had endless shadows dancing around him.

It was the shadowsinger – Azriel.

Kaden knew he did not need to be terrified of the male, both Eleana and Felix adored him, but his presence made Kaden’s blood freeze.

Kaden couldn’t stop watching him as the rest of the Elite observed Eleana’s scent and solidified it into their memories. He was handsome and was fully clothed in leathers with his signature sword strapped across his back. His dark hair was the same shade as the shadows that danced around him and Kaden thought that with him on their side they’d be able to do anything – including finding Eleana.

At last - it had taken three minutes - the Elite was assembled once more.

“You will be divided into two.” Felix explained, “We have been granted by the High Lord of Spring and Summer to search their lands, but only a limited number. Twenty-five of you,” He gestured down the middle of them and waved his hand – showing where the divide was, “will be going to the Spring Court and will be met by High Lord Glaslane at the border. Twenty-four of you will meet High Lord Tarquin and he will direct you from there. Other Illyrian squadrons will join you, the current amount up for debate. Scour the court and find anything you can, I don’t care how miniscule. When you find her, and you will find her, immediately inform the most superior member in your group who will then report to the closest member of High Lord Rhysand and High Lady Feyre’s Inner Circle. That includes me, General Cassian, the shadowsinger Azriel, Morrigan and Nesta. If you are near the Autumn Court you may also inform High Lord Lucien and Lady Elain.”

Felix nodded. The Elite readied for flight at his order but they halted the slight of the shadowsinger’s hand.

He leaned in to whisper something in Felix’s ear, his face showing no emotion even though Kaden knew he must be dying inside.

Felix pinched the bridge of his nose at the shadowsinger’s words and sighed painfully.

“If you find her alive medically attend to her as much as you are able.” his voice strained at the words, “If you find her body or parts of it, do not disturb her.”

Kaden ached at the words. But no, she would be fine. They will find her and she will be fine.

Felix paused and looked at his squadron.

“This is your biggest test. Do not fail me. Find the heir.”

He raised his right arm and the group of twenty-five shot into the air in perfect symmetry.

“Kaden, stay where you are.”

Kaden looked at him baffled as Felix rose his left arm and the other Elite also flew into the air towards the other Court.

Now it was just Kaden, Felix, and the shadowsinger.

“Come here,” Felix ordered.

Kaden walked up to him. Right now Felix wasn’t his friend, he was his general.

“I need you to come with me and my uncle. All the courts gave us permission to search their lands except for Dawn – some bullshit about a sacred holiday. If we need to go there we can’t be bringing a whole squadron. I need you to use your tracking magic, lead where it may. Just in case it leads to Dawn it will only be the three of us. Can you do this?”

“I promise you, Felix. I will be the one to find her.”

“Then let’s stop wasting time. I’ll follow you.”

Kaden didn’t look at Felix as he shot into the air. He sawed high above the camp and stopped when he was high enough to see everything below him in perfect detail. The camp stretched far and wide and was coated in a layer of snow. The mountains loomed behind him and the vast expanse of the Night Court in front. He could see the twinkling flames of the camp below, more and more appearing as the camp was roused not just because of High Lord Rhysand’s call but also because of the approaching dawn.

Where would Eleana be? Where would she be taken?

Kaden could feel blasts of wind on his back from the flapping of Felix and Azriel’s wings but he tried to ignore it. Instead, he honed into his magic. He closed his eyes, summoning the fae magic he possessed. When he opened it he sighed in relief.

Much like when they had tracked the Impeath single dots of light showed Kaden which way to go. They weren’t like flames, rather small, contained spheres of light that guided him towards where he needed. Sometimes they were everywhere, sometimes – like now – they were spread out sparsely. They were always placed where something important or relevant was. The one he was looking at now was clear against the still dark sky. He flew towards it as fast as he could, paying no attention to anything but that. He was barely even aware of the presence of Felix and Azriel.

He _was_ aware of how far away it was, he also knew that the chances of Eleana being at that spot were basically impossible. Once he reached the light he knew that another one would appear once he had assessed why the original was there in the first place.

Finally he reached the spot and landed. They were in a thick part of the forest near the edge of the Dawn Court, a significant distance away from the camp. Kaden had no real feeling for the time, but by the time he landed the sun had risen.

Behind him he heard the others land, neither out of breath like someone who wasn’t from the Elite may have been if they had just flown so hard and fast and long.

“Why here?” Ariel asked.

Kaden turned and looked at the uncle and nephew.

Azriel was eyeing him in a way that was so familiar he nearly stumbled back. The last person who had looked at him like that was his father. Felix had a frantic expression, he would go anywhere if it meant it could save his cousin.

“This is where my magic led me,” Kaden answered.

He observed their surroundings. The trees were tall in this part of the forest, ominously encroaching over them. There were fallen logs and leaves trapped in winters grip. Another dot appeared beside a fallen, moss covered log.

Kaden approached it as Felix and his uncle started scouring other places. He stood at the log. It felt significant somehow, as if it were pulling him towards it. This wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling, this often happened when he was looking for something.

He crouched down behind and squinted at what he saw. More trees, more snow, more winter-

Then a snare.

It was broken but not covered completely in snow, meaning that it had been used recently. Kaden whistled to get the attention of Felix and the shadowsinger who came over in a heartbeat.

“For fucks sake,” muttered Azriel under his breath.

Felix raised an eyebrow at him in question.

“This is one of Feyre’s snares, she’s always had a very particular way of doing it. And since our High Lady was home last night I have no doubt that this one was made by her daughter.”

Felix kicked the tree behind the snare in frustration. “What the hell was she doing out here?” He growled.

Kaden didn’t answer.

A trail of twinkling lights buzzed a path to their right. The snow would’ve marked any tracks that had been made by Eleana but his magic didn’t let him down. He left Azriel and Kaden talking and carefully followed the trail.

“Kaden- Kaden where are you going?” Felix called after him.

The ground sung to him in the same way as the log.

 _She was here_ , it seemed to say, _she ran this path._

Visions of a frightened Eleana sprinting through these woods flashed through his mind. She was running towards something, something bad, but with the intention of helping.

Kaden picked up his pace and soon he was matching that of Vision Eleana.

He ran and ran and ran – the lights blinking out once he crossed them. He could hear Azriel and Felix following him but didn’t slow to explain. Directly ahead of him were crossed over broken branches. Vision Eleana stormed through them, so he did as well.

They harshly scraped along his arms leaving small scratches.

He landed in a small clearing, so full of activity he had to push away his magic so he could see more than just lights.

“ _Oh, Fuck,”_

The clearing was unnatural and should not exist. That was the first thing that was clear.

The second thing that was clear was the reason for Eleana’s running so furiously towards this clearing. A truly horrific sight lay in front of him.

Five bodies, two adults and three children.

The adults were mortifyingly disturbing hung up the way they were. The children were… sad. They were very, very sad.

If Kaden let his magic run wild again he knew he would see more of these faeries than just their bodies. He’d see their energies, their spirits, their ghosts – whatever people’s spirituality called it. It was another of his hidden talents inherited from presumably his mother. Certainly none of his family members he knew possessed the skill.

Which is why he never let them find out.

It could be excused away when he was a child – talking to nothing but thin air. Kaden quickly grew to know that in front of other people it was best not to talk to the Other Side - best not to talk to anyone really.

He’d only been caught once as an adult, and that was nearly three months ago.

“ _Mother_ , what the hell did that?” Felix had just crashed through the branches like Kaden and was astonished at what he saw.

“I have no idea. Considering how strong Eleana’s scent is though I’m guessing it’s the same thing that took her.” Kaden told him.

Azriel came next, much more calmly then the two boys before him.

Kaden glimpsed Azriel staring at him, as if he were more confusing than the bodies strung up between the trees.

“How did you know to come here?” He asked Kaden.

“I tracked her,” was his answer.

“No you didn’t. Tracking is when you follow clues and nicks left by whatever you’re following, not flying and running until you find something.” Azriel’s voice was suspicious. Not in a way that made Kaden think Azriel thought _he_ was the one who had hurt Eleana, but something else.

“I did it the way I have since I was a child. I’ve always done it like that.” Kaden defended.

Azriel didn’t deign to respond.

Maybe you had to grow up with him to like him. Maybe Azriel was an acquired taste.

“Where to now? She’s not here, nothing has been since her. There’s no tracks, her scent stops when the clearing does. I just – fuck, I feel hopeless.” Felix muttered.

It was clear what a toll this ordeal was taking on Felix. He stood straight but the strain on his face revealed how much effort it took not to break down. He also had a slight limp leftover from the Impeath attack. He wasn’t fully healed yet, but Kaden doubted anything could stop him from trying to find Eleana.

“There’s something else I could try…” Kaden admitted. If Kaden could speak to one of the spirits of the faeries he might be able to find out something about where Eleana went. “But you’ll both need to go. I can’t do it while you’re here.”

Felix looked confused but Azriel’s face was once again schooled into neutrality.

“Okay… We’ll go back to where we found the snare to see if we can figure out what she caught. Shout for us when you’re done.” Felix turned away from Kaden and grabbed Azriel’s arm, leading them both away.

Kaden could do this. It been a while since he’d talked to the dead but he’d do anything for Eleana. Anything to find her.

When he could no longer hear Azriel or Felix’s footsteps he once again opened his mind to his magic. It was like opening a stiff door for him. He could always keep it shut so when he needed magic he really had to try. It had been so supressed throughout his life that when he did need it, it was sometimes an effort.

Like now.

When he summoned his magic he was bombarded with the little lights. He pictured himself wading through them like they were the ocean, pushing them away like they were pesky critters. It worked, slowly, and eventually there were so few in the clearing that Kaden could push them from his mind completely.

He closed his eyes and shuddered a deep breath. Seeing the dead was rarely a pleasant task and he always had to steel himself beforehand.

When he opened his eyes it was like a grey mist had descended over everything. It was all the same, and he knew that if anyone looked at the clearing now all they would see it in its non-natural normal state. It was like the grey was covering his irises.

Silence had overtaken the forest. He couldn’t hear anything. Not Felix and Azriel rummaging around in the distance or a single insect or forest creature.

He looked at the bodies once more and caught on the eyes of the children. Such care had been taken when placing the flowers on their eyes – it made no sense as to why they were dead. This was obviously a very planned and ritualistic killing.

As he observed the children, the smallest - maybe only five or six - moved its arm.

Then its leg.

Then it opened its eyes.

Of course it was only its entity – when the little thing moved away from its body it didn’t take any of the horrendous injuries with it.

“Hello,” Kaden greeted it.

No, not it, _her_.

It had been so long that he forgot that he was talking to once living things, and they still deserved his respect.

In a lot of tales Kaden had heard ghosts were described the way their bodies were when they died. This, thankfully, was not true in any case he had seen.

The little faerie girl stepped away from her body. She was sheer – Kaden could see right through her – but she was still evident enough for him to take in her pink dress and matching gloves. She had tightly bound curls and a toothy smile. If she was still alive her skin would’ve been the blue of a summer sky.

“Are you here to help us?” She whispered to him.

She seemed as confused as he was. Kaden prayed to the Mother that she realised she was dead – he hated when they didn’t know and he had to tell them.

“I promise that as soon as I find my friend I will call someone to help you,” he told her.

She gave him a shy little smile and moved more into the grey and towards him.

“Can you tell me what happened here? I’d be really grateful,” He asked her. He gave her his signature smile and her little sheer cheeks blushed.

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t see it.” She leaned forward on the tips of her toes and clasped her hands in front of her.

“That’s okay. Did you see my friend? She’s quite a bit taller than you, she had dark hair-”

“Is she real’ pretty?” The girl fluttered her eyelashes.

“Prettiest in the world. Except for you, of course.”

Her cheeks were a startling pink against the grey.

“Oh, I did see her. She’s not here anymore though. I think it took her underground.” She tugged on the bottom of her dress and stated to sway back and forth.

Kaden crouched down so that they were the same height. This was a tactic he used when he taught the children at camp how to play the pianoforte when they were nervous. He figured it would work on this child.

“What is it? Where is underground?”

Kaden decided that rather than crouching he would simply sit with his legs crossed. He knew time was of the essence, but he also knew this girl possibly had the answers that would lead him to Eleana. Scaring her off by acting like a brutish stranger wouldn’t help anyone.

“It dragged her away and there was nothing she could do. It took her to the cave over there,” The little girl pointed in the opposite direction to where Felix and Azriel were currently searching. “It’s very dark, and it’s really scary. It’s okay though, I wasn’t there for long. I don’t think. Maybe I was? I can’t remember.”

Her blonde brows knitted together. Suddenly she seemed dazed.

Oh, Cauldron. She had no idea.

“What was ‘it’? What was the creature that took her? I hate to bother you, but she’s very important to me. I have to find her and bring her home.”

The little girl got giddy again.

“Do you want to marry her?” She covered her mouth as if it was a scandalous secret.

Kaden hummed in amusement.

“I can’t marry her if I don’t know what took her,” technically it wasn’t a lie.

“Hm. I don’t know what it was. I never saw it.”

“No?”

Hopefully this meant that she died a quick death. Kaden hated the thought of this blue girl suffering.

“I saw things it did. It had a box. I remember that things would move and stuff would happen, but I never saw it. My papa told me to sing it away.”

The way she was describing it… It was like it was there but she _physically_ could not see it. As if it was invisible.

“What did you sing to it?” Kaden knew that this may have been a waste, but it was time to say goodbye to this girl and he didn’t want it ending on a sour note. She was so small and young.

And she was dead.

_“All things bright and new, saved the day of girl gone blue, Lover gold and lover lest, bring the girl a hidden crest, Times are dark but oh have faith, the girl gone blue without a trace, the golden girl is cauldron blessed, to save the good and smite the rest.”_

She twirled around the field as she sang her melody, dress flying in all directions and hair becoming loose. The more she sang her tale the more her voice faded away until Kaden was left alone.

He blinked away the grey and sighed heavily. All he had to do now was find the cave the girl hinted towards.

He turned to find Felix and Azriel but was shocked to see them already standing there.

His eyes widened and face went slack from surprise. It perfectly matched their expressions.

“Tell me, Kaden, how long have you been a veilsinger?”

______

Eleana couldn’t breathe, she wasn’t sure if she wanted to anymore.

Her hair had been choppily cut, it now fell to a few inches below her shoulders, and her wings had been decimated.

Her throat was raw from a mixture of sobbing and screaming, and now she had no voice at all. Just shallow, painful whimpers that involuntarily happened when the invisible creature touched her.

It liked to touch her.

It liked to run its hands down her shredded wings and claw the skin on her face. It enjoyed the taste of her blood that was now mostly spilled on the floor. It overloaded on the taste of her fingernails.

Eleana had never lost a fingernail. Removing one was rather painful.

Wrapped in green chains that restricted her magic, Eleana was powerless.

Eleana wasn’t sure if she wanted to breathe anymore.

_____

“A veilsinger?” Kaden asked.

Azriel moved forward, a flash of raw motion across his face. “You really don’t know. You have no idea what you are.”

Kaden took a step away from the approaching pair.

“A veilsinger, a secretsinger, a sunsinger. Your kind have had many names across the years – humans refer to you as oracles.” Azriel said as though it actually explained anything.

“With all due respect, I don’t care.” Kaden replied. “All I want to do is find Eleana, and I happen to know she’s probably in a cave over there.” Kaden looked in the direction the blue girl had pointed. Kaden usually would never dare act so insolent towards his superiors, but that thought of Eleana being tortured the way the blue girl and her family had made him reckless. He needed to find her. He wished there was a way for him to tell her that he’s going to find her.

If it was even possible, Azriel seemed impressed with his answer.

Without saying another word on the topic Azriel stalked in that direction. He wasn’t angry, he just wanted to find his niece before something even worse happened.

Kaden let the lights back. Now that he had talked to the blue girl’s spirit a lot of the less relevant ones had pattered away. Now there was a clear path north, similar to the one Azriel had just taken.

“We’ll cross the border if we go any further,” Felix joined Kaden at his side. “I don’t give a single shit, I just wanted to let you know.”

Kaden nodded and started along the lights. This time he was slower, looking for other evidence the lights may show. Like there, a broken leaf, or there, uneven snow.

“So how long have you been talking to dead people?” Felix gave Kaden one of his Looks. This look said: tell-me-what-I-want-to-know-you-insufferable-bastard.

“I can’t remember a time when I didn’t,” he answered honestly.

Felix may be his general today, but it would never change the fact that they were friends and Felix had treated him with nothing but kindness and generosity since the moment they met. Kaden respected him, but also just liked the guy. Liked his baking and strange yellow house.

“Have you any other tricks up your sleeve I should be aware of?”

Kaden continued on, ignoring the question.

They walked for hours, scouring the ground looking for clues. Eventually their trek sloped up - they were walking up a border mountain.

The Dawn Court really was lovely. Even though it was adjacent to the Night Court it still had its own little things that marked it as Dawn. Like the trees that now dominated the forest. Where the Night Court’s trees were wide and sturdy these ones were thin and prickly. The roots weren’t as thick and the ground wasn’t as mossy. The mid-day sun was bright and eager through the treetop. It did nothing to erase the cold, but it was nice nonetheless. Well, it would have been on any other day. Kaden would have no warmth in his body until Eleana was found. It made it easier for the trio to track the creature though. Kaden didn’t even need to use his magic the path was becoming so clear.

“Here.”

One word from Azriel and the two younger men to come rushing to his side.

In front of the shadowsinger was an opening as tall as their thighs. It was a few feet wide and showed clear signs of someone being dragged into it. The mud around it was slicked away and small amounts of blood had pooled in the grooves.

“It’s Eleana’s,” confirmed Kaden.

“Then let’s stop standing here with our thumbs up our asses and go get her,” Felix snarled.

There wasn’t enough room for them all to go in together, the opening was far too small, so individually they crawled in. Azriel went first, he wanted to make sure there was nothing on the other side that would bombard them before letting the other two in.

Kaden went last as the most inferior ranked and the one with the least amount of power.

“Careful of the drop!” Felix warned.

Kaden scoffed at his remark and crawled into the space.

To then fall down a metre.

“Fuck,” he muttered as he slammed onto the ground head first.

Felix rolled his eyes at him as Kaden stood up.

They were in either the caverns of the mountain itself or a very large cave with multiple chambers. The walls were dark and winter made it cold and wet. Stalagmite and stalactite grew from the ground and cavern roof but a clear, slightly winding path had been made through the middle. The floor was covered in water to their ankles and light was scarce.

“Stay behind me,” Azriel ordered.

He walked forward, following the path that had been made. The further he walked the deeper the water got. Kaden and Felix nodded at each other and went after Azriel.

All three men had pulled their swords from their backs – Kaden tried not to show his excitement at seeing Truth Teller in flesh - and readied to face whoever had taken Eleana.

Kaden had been wondering about that – who would possibly be stupid enough to take her? It had to have been something fae-like to send that box in such a calculated and sickening way and something strong enough to take down a fae with the amount of tremendous magic Eleana had. It also had to be an imbecile if it thought that the Night Court would stop at anything to find her and bring her home.

Kaden’s heart was beating so hard he was surprised you couldn’t see it through his chest. He tried to be more calm and collected but he was jittery with nerves. This was his first true task as a member of the Elite, he had been nothing but expendable fodder in his previous camp despite his skill, and the consequences of him not succeeding today would be disastrous. Not for him, he didn’t care for himself, but if he failed it meant they hadn’t found Eleana.

More than anything Kaden was scared. Scared for the female that had hit him like a battering ram the moment he met her. The female he was losing himself in. The female he lied to every time he said he wanted to be just her friend.

Even if her scent wasn’t rife in the air he would know in his bones that she was in this cave. She sung to him like all the other things he tracked.

They reached the end to the section of cave they were in and were met with a tall space just wide enough for them to squeeze through.

“Alright then,” Azriel breathed.

He braced one hand on the wall –he had to walk sideways – and started to side step along. It was so tight that his chest and back (with tight wings) grazed against the stone.

None of them were rushing. It would do no good to Eleana if they barged in and just got themselves hurt in the process. They needed to think through their actions. At the same time though Azriel was going as fast as he could. Felix and Kaden wouldn’t go until he waved them ahead.

Finally, Azriel got through the pass. It was so dark Kaden could barely make out his form.

“There’s nothing - yet,” Azriel called.

Felix went next. As he slid through Felix did the same flame-light-thing he did when they went Under the Mountain. It made it infinitely easier for them all to see and when Felix got through to the other side Kaden saw Azriel clap his back in thanks.

Kaden immediately followed. The smell in the path was putrid. It smelt like rot and dust.

Now that Felix had provided more light he could see the tight walls were smeared in blood.

Kaden went faster and breathed in a gasp when he squeezed out.

The three were met with another cavern, except this one was just an entrance to three separate paths.

______

She couldn’t remember her name.

Since it was done scraping off her skin and torturing her mind she had flittered in and out of consciousness.

She didn’t know her name. Did she ever have a name?

She could feel it touching her again. She couldn’t see it touching her again.

She didn’t scream again until it dug its claws into her ribs.

_____

Kaden, Felix and Azriel shot forward as they heard Eleana scream.

The sound was so full of pain it was as though they could feel it too.

They all went to the entrance that they heard the scream come from – they all went to a separate entrance.

“Fuck – it’s probably a trap.” Felix swore.

He was right. There was no way it was a coincidence that they all thought Eleana was down a different track.

Kaden tried to see if there was anything that would guide him the right way but spheres appeared at every turn.

“Does it matter? We need to get to her now – we can’t waste more time being careful when she’s in pain. For fuck’s sake whatever this is sent us her wings. _Her wings_. We need to find her before something worse happens.” Kaden argued.

They were at a standstill. To separate was to put them all, including Eleana, in serious danger. But to stay together and search each place one at a time could mean they are too late to save Eleana, _and they had to save her._ Kaden would never be able to live with himself if when they found her it was too late.

“You two take separate tunnels back and I’ll summon Rhys and Feyre. The High Lord can’t tell us we’re not allowed to enter when we know she’s here. Be careful and I’ll be back soon and take the tunnel neither of you did.”

Azriel put his hand on Felix’s shoulder in a gesture of faith and goodwill. He turned to Kaden, his gaze piercing him, and did the same.

“Go.”

With one last look Felix ran down the tunnel to the left and Kaden down the middle.

It was twist after turn and Kaden could barely see. He was trying to be as quiet as he could but it was difficult when his speed made so much of the water at his feet splash. _At this point it was most likely useless trying to remain hidden_ , Kaden pondered, _it either knows we’re here or it’s going to soon._

Kaden had to run his hands along the blood walls to make sure he wasn’t going to run into one. He was lucky he could still see anything. With the combined senses of a High Fae and Illyrian, Kaden’s eyesight was better than most.

_Maybe it had to do with what the shadowsinger said. A veilsinger._

Kaden pushed the thought from his mind. Now was not the time to think about what that was or what it meant.

He walked for what could’ve been minutes, could’ve been hours, but eventually in the distance he saw a dim light. The closer he got to it the more shape it took on. He slowed down so that the sloshing noise from his footsteps was at a minimum.

The light was an opening to another chamber. This place was like a maze, and it frustrated the fuck out of Kaden. He just wanted to find her. He couldn’t bear it if he didn’t find her.

He heard another cry of pain from Eleana and convulsed at the sound.

He dismissed any thoughts about the practically of staying silent or being inconspicuous. He had to get to her before she made another noise like that.

He rushed forward, the water barely slowing him down.

He nearly tripped when he finally entered the next part of the cave. There were three steps hidden under the water that led up to the cavern. This part was brightly lit by torches and completely dry.

Hung up with a strange green adamant bolted to the bare scraps of her wings was Eleana. Her toes were barely touching the floor, not enough to support even an inch of her weight, and her arms were limp at her side. Her body was bare of clothing but she was covered in her own blood from head to toe.

“ _Mother_ ,”

Kaden rushed forward. With one hand he hooked under her behind so that he could hold her up and she would no longer be swaying from her wings. With his other hand he cupped her face.

“Eleana? Eleana, wake up.” He pleaded with her.

He had no idea how long she had been unconscious, but it couldn’t have been long if he had only recently heard her scream.

Her eyelids fluttered at his voice but she didn’t open them.

He smoothed back her choppy hair and tried again.

“Hey, you. I really need you to open your eyes, okay?”

Still holding her with one arm, he used the sword he had sheathed when he grabbed her to start hacking at the stone on her wings. It was hard to reach and it seemed to be impenetrable but he continued to try anyway. He didn’t want to let her go but he might have to if he couldn’t find a way to get her down while holding her.

“Eleana, you’re going to be fine. I promise. Besides, you owe me a dance at a wedding. I can’t show you off to my family if you don’t open your eyes.” He tried to goad her.

He discarded his sword so that he could use his arm again. He did the one thing he knew comforted her above anything else. He linked their fingers and brought her hand to his mouth to press a kiss on her knuckles.

He cringed when he noticed she was missing most of her fingernails. From the blood, it looked like they had been forcefully ripped off.

He guided her still-limp arm around his neck and rested his forehead on hers.

He sent his magic shooting through her. He tried to restrain it to her body and not her wings - he didn’t want them to heal when those horrible green chains were still bolted through them.

“Ka, Ka-den,” She mumbled.

He smiled in relief. Her eyes still weren’t open but talking was just as good, if not better.

“Hey,”

He kissed the tip of her nose and intensified his healing magic.

She mumbled incoherently.

“What was that?”

“ _Run_ ,” She stammered.

Claws wrapped around his body and dug into his abdomen. He cried out in pain and was forcefully torn away from Eleana and shoved to the ground. He bit his lip when his head banged against the stone but immediately got to his feet to face his attacker.

Or not?

He and Eleana were the only ones in the chamber.

“ _I’m not done with her yet_ ,” something hissed from behind him.

He pivoted towards the voice but there was still nothing there.

Eleana cried out again and he turned just in time to see long, jagged marks appear on her stomach.

_I saw things it did… but I never saw it._

The words of the blue girl tugged at his memory.

Suddenly it made sense. Kaden had been correct in his assumptions that this creature may be invisible.

Another mark appeared on Eleana but she had gotten too weak to cry anymore.

He went to go to her but then felt a blow to his side and then his temple. He stumbled away and nearly slipped. Just because the ground wasn’t covered in water didn’t mean it wasn’t as slimy as the rest of the cave. The only areas that seemed to be safe to walk on without the risk of slipping were the ones where there was dried blood instead of grime.

Kaden was shoved to the ground and had his hair ripped back. How was he supposed to fight a creature he couldn’t see?

_Veilsinger veilsinger veilsinger_

Kaden still didn’t know what it meant, but it gave him the idea to open his magic to the grey in-between like he did before. Using his magic like that revealed things others couldn’t see – maybe now would be the same.

He closed his eyes and opened them again with an intake of breath. At first all he could see was Eleana and the grey, but then a shadowy figure started to materialize.

It looked like a male human in the most basic of ways. It was shorter than him, shorter than Eleana as well, and had dark hair and skin. That’s where any human resemblance stopped.

One of its hands were clubbed – its arm ended in a stub. The other was a three-taloned claw like a bird that seemed to be secreting something from the tips. It was wearing torn shorts but besides that nothing.

The creature all in itself wasn’t that deadly. Its invisibility is what gives it its true edge.

It circled around Eleana, deciding where to land its next blow. It had no idea that Kaden could see it. If it where any other time Kaden could’ve planned carefully what to do to give him the best chance he had at winning this fight. He had learned how to be rational and calculated in stressful situations with the Elite.

Now was not the time to use those skills.

With a battle-cry Kaden picked up the sword he had dropped and charged at the creature. It smirked like it was immortal.

The smirk was still on its face when Kaden beheaded it.

His mighty sword cut through its flesh as though it was nothing but air. It had no chance against Kaden, even if it was to have the opportunity to defend itself.

Nothing would be able to stand against Kaden if it was her they were threatening.

He had barely any friends as a child and only the most basic scraps of love from his family. Now that he had people he cared about, and who cared about him, he would do anything to protect them.

The creatures head hadn’t stopped rolling before Kaden was hacking at the chains again. One finally broke and Eleana sickenly fell to the floor and to the side that was still attached to her wing. The bolt was still in the one that he had cut, but someone with more skill and knowledge would be needed to get that out safely. He started on the other side. It was much easier to get through them when he wasn’t holding her.

The other side snapped and Eleana collapsed on her side. He rushed to her and picked her up to cradle her in his arms.

“Eleana? We’re safe now, we just need to get out of here.” He promised her.

She hummed in response and was too weak to say anything else.

Kaden stripped off the leathers covering his shirt and discarded them – they were useless anyway. He then took off his shirt and angled her until he could slip it over her body. It didn’t even register in his mind that he was seeing Eleana naked. She was too fragile and covered in blood for this to be anything but a harrowing moment.

His shirt wouldn’t offer her much warmth in this cold place, but hopefully it could protect her from the other elements like the grit and water he would inevitably splash when taking her back.

He put one arms under her legs and the other around her waist and heaved her up. As he was walking he tried healing her as much as he could, but she was in bad condition. He felt tears in his eyes at the sight of the fiery Eleana reduced to a blubbering mess.

“Y- you… you-”

“Shush, don’t try to speak,” Kaden, aware of the stairs this time, carefully went down them while trying not to jostle her.

Her head rested on his shoulder and she had yet to open her eyes.

“It hurts,” she managed to whisper.

“I know, I’m sorry. Azriel and Felix are waiting for us though, we just have to find them.”

Further Kaden went back the way he came.

He hated how familiar it felt to have her in his arms like this and for it never to be for a positive reason. He became distressed at the memory of the very first time he had met her and he’d flown her to Felix’s home. The look of awe and wonder she gave his wings is an image so ingrained in his memory sometimes he dreamt of it.

It was clear how much she loved flying, how important it was to her. For the love of the Cauldron before he even met her he’d heard of the legendary flying skills the heir possessed.

And now they were dragging in the water, scathing along the rock, broken beyond repair.


	8. Chapter 8

_Dearest Eleana, I’m afraid your meddlesome cousin found our letters and deemed that I was talking rather audaciously to the Heir to the Night Court. Therefore, I shall try to use my most advanced vernacular so that I may appease the rigorous language standards of the Archeron variety._

Eleana smiled at the letter in her hand. It was the forty-first letter she had received from her mate – one for every day she had yet to return to their camp.

After what happened… She needed to be in Velaris, even if she hadn’t finished her training yet. One day she would go back - maybe when she could sleep for more than two hours before she woke up screaming, maybe when her fingernails had fully grown back, maybe after her mother fixed her wings. She was still in a state where she couldn’t be left alone – she always had somebody with her.

Most of the time it was either one or both of her parents, but her Aunt Mor and Uncle Azriel were also around often. Az disappeared a lot though. For a reason unbeknownst to Eleana (well a reason she had yet to fully believe) he had taken to spending a lot of time with Kaden. Az told her how impressed he was with the male after finding her. As soon as they were out of that cave Kaden had given her straight to Azriel and gone with Felix to the clearing with the dead faeries. The rest of the Elite had been summoned and were going to investigate.

This angered the High Lord of the Dawn Court, but he had no right to argue against her father. Turns out the High Lord was fully aware of the mysterious killings in his court and wanted to keep the knowledge secret from the other rulers of Prythian. The story he’d fed her father about a sacred holiday had been nothing but bullshit. Eleana wasn’t too mad about it – Dawn had sent their own fae out to look for her, they’d just failed dismally.

_In all seriousness I think Felix and I are now dating. He refuses to leave me alone and is always wondering where I am. He even asked me to move in with him! Do you think he’ll propose soon? I hope its romantic – maybe on the streets of Velaris at sunset. You could be my best (wo)man._

Eleana laughed. She didn’t laugh much anymore.

Mor, who had heard the small noise escape her niece, beamed.

Mor and Azriel were her current minders. Eleana was curled up in bed – she was too exhausted to go anywhere – and Mor sat in a reading chair on the other side of the room. While Eleana read her letters Mor read an erotic novel. Eleana couldn’t judge – the book was from her favourites shelf.

 _Felix and I are having a grand time. Jonas the Jackass got demoted today, I wish you could’ve seen it. I’ve never seen someone’s face go so red before. It would’ve been the highlight of my day until I saw that I had another letter from you waiting at my tent. I rather like this winnow-letter thing you have going on. It is far more reliable than any other postal service I’ve seen. To address your question, and I quote, ‘_ are we going to talk about how you saw me naked??? _’ (I knew the question was urgent from the amount of questions marks - Felix thought it excessive, I think it was the perfect amount). My answer is I didn’t really see you naked, but I’m sure you have what the kids call a ‘rockin’ bod’. I also declined Felix’s request to move in. He already feels the need to snoop through my life, I don’t even want to think about how bad it would be if we lived together._

Eleana suspected Kaden had many reasons for not wanting to leave his tent, least of all Felix’s snoopiness.

_Other than that nothing had changed since my last letter. I hope you’re sleeping okay, and I hope I can see you again soon, but take as long as you need. These letters are enough to fill the Eleana shaped hole in my life._

_Yours truly,_

_Kaden._

_P.s I read the book you recommended and have lots of thoughts. Far too many for paper. I’ll tell them to you when I inevitably miss you too much and enlist Felix to help break into your home in Velaris._

_P.p.s Felix stop reading our letters._

The last line was clearly intended for her nosy cousin, and it made her laugh again.

“What are you giggling at, Laya?” Mor eyed her curiously over the top of her page.

Eleana blushed shyly and nestled further into her blankets. She had to be careful not to jostle her wings too much. There wasn’t really any part of them to salvage. Eleana had sobbed into her father’s arms for days when her mother told her – even if there was a viable solution. Her mother had inherited many things when she had been Made, including the signature shapeshifting ability of the Spring Court. Not only could she change herself, but also other people. Once the scraps of Eleana’s wings healed Feyre would be able to fashion her a new pair identical to her old ones. But they still wouldn’t be hers. Her perfect wings.

Cassian had come to her then, told her how they would take some time getting used to but eventually they would be great. All it would take is one trip to the sky and Eleana wouldn’t care where the wings came from, as long as she had them.

Eleana cried and asked how her uncle knew this – he told her to trust him.

“Nothing,” Eleana grumbled. A happy grumble, but a grumble all the same.

“Hm, does it have anything to do with a certain male waiting for you?” Mor wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

“No,” Eleana scoffed.

“Oh, really.” Mor jested.

“It doesn’t matter anyway. I’m not ready to go back.”

Not when she couldn’t fly, not when she was too weak to even walk the Rainbow on her own.

Mor had a sad smile at that and closed her book. She put it on the small table beside her and got up to walk over to her niece. Rather than giving her a hug or reassuring words, she climbed into bed next to her and rested her head on Eleana’s shoulder.

“It was five-hundred years until Azriel and I stopped being idiots. I guarantee your boy is smarter than we were.” Mor told her. “I’m surprised he hasn’t figured it out yet, being a veilsinger. Or maybe that’s why – he doesn’t realise what you have is a bond rather than just his magic picking up on yours.”

“It doesn’t matter either way. I’m not going to pressure him.” There was no point to pressuring him anyway – all it would do is drive him away. Kaden has made it clear all he wants to be is friends, so that is how it shall be.

“What are you two getting up to?” Azriel walked into the room and interrupted their conversation.

Az smirked at them crawled up in bed and sat crossed-legged at their feet.

“Just Laya’s torrid love affair.” Mor answered.

“By the cauldron,” Eleana groaned. She lifted the blanket over her head to hide her face.

“Ah yes, with the young Kaden. Strapping boy that one. Rather oblivious considering everything.”

Azriel was referring to Kaden’s newly named magic. In one of their first letters, they had piled up a bit because Eleana had passed out for three days after the attack, Kaden told her about what Azriel had explained to him about his magic. It was only further talked about in more recent letter – all the experiments they had done to fine tune the specifics of his magic. A veilsinger was even rarer than a shadowsinger – the biggest difference is once isn’t noticeable unless you look closely and the other is impossible to hide.

“Don’t be rude.” Eleana’s voice was muffled by the blanket.

Eleana didn’t see Azriel roll his eyes, but she definitely noticed when he yanked down the blanket so they were facing each other.

“I’m going there again tomorrow.” He told her.

“Have fun?” Azriel went to the camp plenty, she didn’t know why it felt relevant he tell her now.

“If you’d like, I can ask Rhys if you could come and spend the day. Felix is dying to see you.”

Eleana considered it. She wanted to go, to see her cousin and see her friend, but she didn’t know if she would be able to handle it. Before the events of the previous months Eleana had already been a terrible sleeper. Combine that with the fact that she could barely stand from being so weak and exhausted because of her nightmares? She was a dead woman walking. If she couldn’t handle somewhere as peaceful as Velaris – her true home – how could she possibly handle her second one?

She sighed.

Her new dreams were far worse than any of her others – rivalling even her dreams about the Room. She had taken to sleeping in her parent’s room with the lights on. Even then it wasn’t long until they were shaking her awake and she was clawing at anything she could reach.

“I’m – I’m not sure if it’s a good idea.” She whispered.

Azriel gently ran a hand down her face.

“You don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for.”

She nodded.

Azriel got up to leave but Eleana grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Maybe not the whole day? Just some, like lunch or dinner. Just so I can visit.” Eleana should take this opportunity. Kaden may have complained about not seeing her but he didn’t even know they were mates. Eleana needed to see him, thank him again for saving her, and see him in person. She also missed Felix terribly. She had barely spoken to him since she’d left.

A ghost of a smile crossed Azriel’s face.

“I’ll ask your father.”

______

It had taken a lot to convince her father to let her go, but eventually Azriel with the help of Cassian wore him and her mother down.

The deal was Eleana would be back in Velaris before dark and would at all times be accompanied by Felix or Azriel. No exceptions. As soon as she was too tired she needed to come home. No sleeping at the camp if Rhys couldn’t be there for when she woke up. If people badgered her about what happened, she had his full permission to beat the shit out of them, or order her uncle to beat the shit out of them for her.

“There’s no need to be nervous, Laya.” Azriel stood with her out the front of her home on the outskirts of the city.

She had already said goodbye to her father that morning before he went off to deal with problems in Hewn City, and she already missed his reassuring presence.

“I’m not nervous,” She said as casually as she could. Her nervous fretting and shaking revealed her lie, but Azriel was too polite to point it out.

“Then let’s go,” Azriel went to take her hand to winnow them away but were stopped by a frantic mother racing up the path to her house.

“Wait, wait, wait,” She cried.

Feyre had just been shopping, as evidenced by the bags now spilling out of her hands. Feyre had said goodbye to her daughter that morning while they ate breakfast, but it seemed like it wasn’t enough.

She ended up just throwing down her bags and throwing her arms around her daughter.

“You summon me if you need anything, you hear? And be safe, and don’t go anywhere alone, and stay with Felix and Az. Did I tell you to be safe? I love you,” She rambled. One of her hands was gripping onto the back of Eleana’s shirt and the other was smoothing down the back of her hair. “Felix will be so excited to see you, and surprised! He didn’t expect to see you for a while.”

Even if Eleana couldn’t hear the sniffles from her mother, the light drops on her shoulder would’ve given away that she was crying.

“It’s going to be fine,” Eleana reassured her mother. “I’ll be back before dark. Go have a romantic dinner or something else you can’t do while I’m here.”

Feyre squeezed her tightly one more time before releasing her. “Have fun!” She said enthusiastically.

Azriel came to Eleana’s side once more and winnowed them away before another possible interruption.

It had been a while since Eleana felt the rushing sensation of rushing through a void in existence, and it left her just as breathless as it had when she was a child.

It was around lunch, so plenty of Illyrians were milling around. They had arrived at what Eleana knew to be the houses her mother had for the bastard children. They weren’t at all what you’d expect. They were nice homes – obvious care taken in their creation. They had light brown render covering the exterior and a black, tiled roof. There were windows everywhere to get the best of the natural light, so you could easily see the children on the inside.

Eleana knew Felix did a lot of work with these children, he had since he was old enough. It was just another way that he showcased his leadership skills to the rest of the camp.

Speaking of her cousin…

“Where is he?” She asked Az. She craned her head to better look into the windows but was unsuccessful in spotting him.

Az put a hand on the top of her head and moved it so that her gaze focused to her side.

There was Felix and Kaden.

With their left and right legs tied together.

What on earth were they doing?

They had their arms around each other’s shoulders in an easy way that demonstrated their comradery and were attempting to walk as one. They moved their outside legs, then their conjoined inner one, and let out whoops of joy at every step. They were focusing on their feet and didn’t even notice her. Neither did the children milling around them laughing at the spectacle they were making. Eleana noted that the children weren’t only bastards, but also children who simply enjoyed playing the games Felix created.

“Is this a new game? Can I play?” Eleana shouted over the sounds of the giggling children.

The faces of both Felix and Kaden shot forward at her call, shock coating their expressions.

“Eleana!” They yelled simultaneously.

They both lurched forward – completely forgetting that they had their legs tied together. They both fell and slammed into the path of packed dirt and flailed around and kicked until they were free of their confines to each other.

Felix was the first to get free and ran towards her. He picked her up as if she was as light as a feather and threw her over his shoulder.

“Laya! You’re back!”

She tapped his back. “Only for a bit.”

“Good enough for me,” He let her down and gave her a proper hug, careful to avoid areas where she could still be in pain.

At this point most of the things that were effecting her were mental and not physical, but her cousin didn’t know that. It had been over seven years since he had gone this long without seeing her.

Eleana pulled away to smile at him. She noticed Kaden lingering to the side.

She stepped away from her cousin and turned to her oblivious mate.

“Hello,” She said.

“Hello,” He said.

There was a second pause before he too picked her up in his arms to embrace her. He tucked her so close into him he was all she could smell. The delicious smell of pine, wood and embers. He was warm, he had always been so warm, and she buried her face into his chest and wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. This was the male who had sent her forty one letters in as many days so that she wouldn’t go crazy. The male that had sent her letters as short as a joke and as long as a short novel to distract her from her daily horrors. Her toes lightly grazed the ground and,

Fear seized her.

She couldn’t control it. It was just too close to what it had been like in the cave.

Kaden put her down instantly and stepped away. She followed his steps with her own though so that she was still tucked into him and breathing his scent.

“I’m sorry,” She mumbled into his chest.

Slowly his hands came around her again. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m glad to see you again.” He was as quite as her.

Eleana felt someone tugging on her knit leggings. She looked down to see a small child. The girl was probably around eight years old but was thinner than normal. Eleana could tell from her clothing, a frayed red coat that barely accommodated for her wings and shoes falling apart at the soles, that this girl was one of the inhabitants from the share house.

“Yes?” Eleana had barely turned her head to look at the girl, and certainly didn’t step away from Kaden.

“I’m sorry, but we were kind of in the middle of something.” She looked truly apologetic. Eleana wondered why a minute away from whatever they were doing mattered so much, then the girl turned her gaze awestruck at Kaden.

Eleana was amused by her.

“I’ll give them back to you in a minute,” She smiled kindly.

“Um, okay. If you insist.” She turned to walk away but bumped into Felix’s legs.

“Be mindful of who you sass, little one. That’s High Lady Feyre’s daughter.” Felix laughed.

The little girl gave Eleana a sceptical look. “Are trying to trick me again? Everyone knows Eleana is in Velaris why they figure out what to do with her wings. Most people say she’s not even coming back.”

Kaden’s eyes widened in horror but Eleana just laughed. “You shouldn’t always listen to rumours. I’ll be back soon enough.”

The girl seemed to realise then who she was actually talking to and skittered away with a mumbled apology.

“Come inside with us,” Kaden said into her ear. “The ones too little to play are dying for story-time.”

“Does everyone know what happened?” She asked him.

Felix came up beside her and lightly touched her back. “I would be lying if I told you rumours weren’t running rampart about what happened. It ranges from mortifying to impossible. Some people think you’ve been dead this whole time and the Inner Circle is trying to cover it up. It’s ridiculous – really. They’ll move on once something more exciting happens.”

“Why would that think my parents are hiding my death? That’s ridiculous.”

“By hiding it if you were dead it would stop people from fearing whatever monster killed you – apparently. No one likes thinking about what it would mean for everyone else if the thing that killed _you_ is still out there.”

“Let’s not talk about this,” Kaden stepped away from her but not enough to actually let her go, just enough to tug her along and into the house. They walked together, his arm around her shoulder and hers around his waist, and into the house.

Eleana was met with the sounds of gleefully screaming children. As soon as Felix and Kaden had hinted at coming inside the children flocked to join them.

The inside of the house – no, home, this was a home – was warm and welcoming. Exactly what Eleana would expect from her mother.

Kaden led her through a hallway that had three rooms branching off on each side. All the doors were open – Eleana expected this to be because this was a children’s house, the one for teenagers and young adults most likely was more private – and contained two beds each and toys littered throughout. At the end of the hallway was a kitchen and lounge blended into one. Feyre had hired a permanent keeper, cook, and maid for the houses and the minder of this one was currently dozing off on a sofa. Felix sniggered at the sight as though this was a common occurrence. Eleana was led through another door that led to an expanse of a room. It was wide and tall and had a bookshelf running along the opposite wall and desks on the other. There were also reading chairs, very similar to the ones in Eleana’s room at home in Velaris, scattered throughout. The colour of the walls was the same in every room, but somehow the red in this one was even more vibrant.

There were three children sitting in the middle of the room, ages from around three to nine if Eleana had to guess, playing with an assortment of blocks. Other children were also running around taking advantage of the things Feyre had provided for them – not all of them inhabitants of this home, Eleana noted again.

Kaden released Eleana and went to grab a book from the large bookcase. He waved his hands over the books as though by magic one would choose itself for him. Eventually he settled on an illustrated picture book about the mortal lands.

“Anyone want to read?” He asked the question but from the smirk on his face Eleana knew he already knew the answer.

Multiple heads piqued up at his question. That was followed by young children abandoning what they were doing to sit in a semicircle around the reading chair in the centre of the room. As this was happening Felix came to stand beside Eleana.

“He’s rather dramatic when he reads. The children love it.” Felix explained. “A lot of them struggle to read so they love it when he does. We try our best to teach them but… Well, I find it a lot easier to teach someone how to throw a punch than make sense of random scribbles and lines. The tutors also don’t try nearly as hard as they should with them. They just don’t really care.”

Once Kaden sat down with the book the children scooted as close to him as they could. One very small girl – a toddler – waddled over and tried to climb to sit on his lap. He smiled down at her and scooped her up so she could rest on his knee.

There was one word that stood out when Kaden read: Adorable.

He would do different accents and voices depending on what character was speaking and do weird hand movements and facial expressions. He let the toddler on his lap turn the pages for him and thanked her every time. It was like he was an actor in the theatre. Every now and again he would look at her and smile as though he was surprised she was still there.

The children did truly love it. They giggled and clapped and gasped at the story. All were begging for another one when Kaden was done but he insisted that first they go scrounge up something to eat. Only the toddler remained as she had dozed off snuggled into his chest.

“That was quite something,” Eleana stood in front of him and Felix came over to take the sleeping toddler away.

“I’d give it an average review. Not your best work if I’m being honest,” Felix laughed as he left. Kaden gave him the finger.

“Would you like a story too?” Kaden asked her. He had a mischievous look in his eyes but a kind smile.

They were the only two left in the cluttered room. The children had gone to either eat their lunch or return home and Felix had taken the toddler to presumably her room for a nap.

“Give me your best,” She joked.

She went to sit down in front of him but he lightly grabbed her hand to pull her to him. She sat on his leg the way the little girl had.

“I’m glad you’re back,” he turned serious. “The letters were good, but never as good as speaking to you in person.”

Eleana nodded in agreement and moved closer to him. Today was her favourite kind of day – a day where he was okay with her touching him.

“Things are bad, but I’m trying. I will come back for more than a visit – I promise. I’m just not ready. Right now I need both my parents with me.” She confessed. “I barely slept as it was, I don’t know how I’d even get a wink if I didn’t know they were both there to protect me.”

He rubbed soothing circles on her back with his thumb.

“I can’t imagine how horrible that would’ve been. Sometimes I have nightmares about finding you too late, or not finding you at all.”

“Can’t you? Imagine it, I mean. I’d rather go through one night of that terror than twenty years.”

His face turned down in shame. “But you didn’t deserve what happened to you-”

“And neither did you,” She said forcefully. She lifted his chin so his eyes met her. “ _Neither did you_ ,” She repeated.

“Eleana, my brothers found me talking to the ghost of a missing girl. When I told them I knew where she was they thought I was the one that killed her. Anyone would’ve reacted in the same way. I should have hidden it better – I had twenty years of practise. Azriel tells me my magic is a wonderful gift, but it has only ever hurt people. I try to use it for good-” He stopped suddenly like he simply couldn’t continue.

“Do you regret finding me?” She queried.

He looked at her – horrified. His wings came to wrap around them, as if they were an extra layer of protection for her.

“Of course not!”

“Would you have found me if it wasn’t for your magic?”

“I would’ve searched to the ends of the earth to find you. Then I’d do it again.”

“Oh Kaden.” She had one hand splayed on his chest and the other tangled in the back of his hair. “If you had been raised with a family that loved you and treated you the way you deserve this wouldn’t even be in question. The development in your magic – being able to talk to the Other Side, being guided by things unknown, being able to see things others can’t – I’ll admit it’s unexpected. But it’s also nothing less than phenomenal!”

He looked at her, light dancing in his eyes. She wondered what he saw when he looked at her.

“You’re a very good friend to have, Eleana.”

“And you are also a very good friend to have.” She laughed.

Eleana had something she wanted to ask him. Something that had been playing on her mind since she read his letter.

“Did you really not see me naked? It’s kind of hard to believe you didn’t see me naked.”

Kaden burst out laughing.

“ _Mother,_ no I didn’t really see you naked. Although you wouldn’t be the first Archeron I had.”

“Who else have you seen naked?” She snorted.

“I would tell you the story but it is truly traumatizing. The basics are, I was invited to Felix’s, I went early, and I’ve never seen so many naked people together at once before. In the longue too, his sister has sat on that couch!”

“How many people? Three? Four?”

Kaden was laughing too hard to speak so he just held up six fingers.

“ _Cauldron_ , maybe if we tell people how frisky he is they’ll stop talking about me.”

“Probably shouldn’t,” Kaden wheezed. “Your trainer Alixia was one of them.”

“For fuck’s _sake_ ,” She groaned.

He was laughing so hard she was shaking in his lap. “Reason – reason number two I can’t live with him. I don’t think I could handle seeing his bare arse on a daily basis. It’s honestly too much to talk about.”

He buried his head in her shoulders and brought his wings back.

“I see you two are having fun.” Azriel said as he walked in with Felix at his side.

It was strange to think everyone in this room knew Kaden as her mate except for the male himself.

“Just hearing some interesting stories about Felix. Here I was thinking I was the scandalous one in the family.” Eleana joked.

Felix looked confused and then realisation dawned on him. He shot a playful glare at Kaden but otherwise pretended like he didn’t know what was going on.

“Sorry to interfere but Kaden your leathers are ready. You should get them now so you something proper to wear at training.” Az said.

His leathers? Eleana gasped. “Your leathers! Shit, Kaden. I completely forgot to give you another pair. What have you been using this whole time?” She had forgotten that she told him she was going to get him another pair after she ruined the ones he already had.

“You didn’t forget, you were just preoccupied.” Kaden squeezed her lightly before letting her go and getting up. She slid so that while he was standing she had been move to the seat. “I’ll go get them now. Fancy a walk, Eleana?”

He reached out his hand to take hers but Azriel stepped between them to help her up.

“I’m not sure you should be going, Laya. It’s rather far away.” What Azriel really meant was that trying to walk that far would likely exhaust her and they’d have to leave.

“I’m sure I’ll be okay,” she lied. She just wanted to stay for as long as she could. Wanted to spend more time with her mate while he was in this mood.

“Are you still injured? I had no idea. Eleana, if so you should stay – it won’t take me long-”

“I’m not injured,” Eleana interrupted Kaden. “I’m just really tired at the moment. It’s been a while since I slept.”

“How long?” Kaden questioned. He looked at her curiously. She had already told him in her letters that she had trouble sleeping, but she vastly under exaggerated it.

“I think maybe two days? I can’t quite remember.” She told him. The days often blurred together for her.

Azriel, still holding onto her elbow, said, “It’s been four. I don’t want you going where I can’t see you.”

Eleana – politely – shook off his grasp and moved away from the three males. She stood behind the chair Kaden had just been sitting in and braced her hands on the back of it.

“Fresh air would do me good. It’s just walking and – and I haven’t done much lately. If it gets too much I’ll summon you or Felix. All I’ve done lately is rest, and I know I’ve needed it, but maybe – if I do more maybe I’ll sleep more.” She rambled. She was trying to convince her uncle. If he told her no then she wouldn’t go, it was as simple as that. But she’d like too – she’d really, _really_ like to.

“If it’s me that’s the issue you’re both welcome to come.” Kaden could see how desperate she wanted to go and was trying to help.

Azriel looked at Kaden with surprising fondness. If you didn’t know Azriel you wouldn’t be able to spot it, but Az had looked at her and Felix that way countless times. Eleana doubted Kaden realised.

“It’s not you, son. I just don’t know if she’s ready for it.” Azriel turned away from Kaden to face her. “But if you think you’ll be okay, you can go. If anything happens though I want you to summon me straight away. Kaden,” he turned back to the male, “if anything out of the ordinary happens I will know.”

He nodded at the two and then stepped back. He grabbed Felix by the back of the neck and the two retreated talking in low whispers.

“Here, take this. Even if spring is approaching it is still freezing out there.” While she had been watching her cousin and uncle leave Kaden had found a black coat. It was lovely, practical and not lavish. It smelt like him and Eleana realised that is was _actually_ his.

“Where did you get this?” She asked as he draped it over her shoulders. No one could see her wings, what was left of them was strapped under her shirt, but he knew they were there and that they were still tender.

“It was a gift from your aunt Morrigan. I tried to say no but she can be very forceful.”

Eleana stretched her arms into the coat. It was way too big for her, and she loved it.

“Let’s go,” He took her by the hand and led her out of the room. They went back through the longue, dining and kitchen area and were met with the food-covered, smiling faces of the occupants.

“You’re not leaving are you?” One child yelled. There were too many sitting around with soup and bread that Eleana couldn’t tell who the voice had come from.

“We have to go pick something up, I’ll be back later.” Kaden answered. From the look of it he knew exactly who had yelled.

“And what about her?”

“Who is she?”

“Why is she here?”

Shouted questions came from the children.

“She’s High Lady Feyre’s daughter, Eleana.”

The children oohed at his answer and left their food to come gather around them. They all looked at him like he was a High Lord. It dawned on her that he must’ve started spending time with them as soon as he came to this camp.

“I love High Lady Feyre,” one girl who was standing in front of her sighed.

Another child grabbed the sleeve of Kaden’s coat so that he could tug her down. She bet over and he stood on his toes. “Can you tell her I said hello and that I miss her and she can come for dinner whenever she wants? We won’t make any more messes.”

“I’ll tell her tonight,” Feyre replied.

“Oh I miss her so much,” a child toward the back said. “I haven’t seen her in ages.”

Eleana stood straight again.

“High Lady Feyre hadn’t visited since you went back to Velaris.” Kaden explained.

Guilt gnawed at her stomach. None of these children had parents and her mother was probably the closest thing they would ever have. She had worked so hard to set up these houses and make them a home for all the unwanted children. It was clear they missed Feyre dearly, and Eleana was the one taking her away from them.

“Get that look off your face. They have plenty of people they miss. She is _your_ mother, and she was the one who chose not to visit. You are her priority, just as any child should be with their parent. So stop feeling guilty,” Kaden vehemently murmured into her ear.

“Alright,” he said louder and to the children, “we need to go now.”

The children collectively sighed and wandered back to their food.

Kaden and Eleana went back through the hallway, hands still entwined, and out into the brisk air.

They talked as they walked, Kaden cracking jokes and Eleana laughing along. They stopped every now and again to warm themselves up on the sporadically lit fires – really it was so Eleana could rest, not that Kaden ever actually uttered the excuse.

Eventually though Eleana’s eyes started to droop and her steps became slower, exhaustion overcoming her. Kaden didn’t summon Azriel, rather he crouched down so that he could carry Eleana on his back. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and legs around his waist so she was settled between his wings and with his hands firmly planted under her knees. He skipped along and she was laughing so hard at his antics that she nearly fell off multiple times.

He only let her down once they reached the market part of the camp. It was made up of stalls and small shops but the plethora of them is what gave it size. There were too many Illyrians to continue prancing around so they dodged around people and sellers with their elbows linked and on their feet instead.

They reached the tailer and went in, a small chime from a bell at the top of the door greeting them.

Eleana soon found out Kaden looked damn fine in leathers. The tailer had made him try them on so that she could make sure they were perfect. In her eyes this was an order made by the shadowsinger, not some lowly bastard-born.

Kaden told her as they were walking that Az made him get them and also paid for them, much to the disdain of Kaden. He and Azriel had spent a lot of time together lately, Felix coming as well whenever he felt like it. Azriel helped explore the depths of his magic, he was now able to do things he didn’t even think was possible.

 _“I can see it when people winnow,”_ he’d told her, _“it’s as though I can see them blurring through the other realities.”_

Kaden stood in front of her now with the leathers Azriel had got him and _shit._ She was royally screwed.

The black leathers were perfectly fitted to his body, making him seem even taller and muscled. The dark colour also made his black eyes and blonde hair stand stark. They made his skin more golden and his scars more prominent and he was so beautiful Eleana could cry.

“Look okay?” He posed for her humorously.

“You look like a king,” She breathed.

_______

Rhys felt like he could finally breathe when that night his daughter slept. She was curled up in his and Feyre’s bed and was clutching a pillow to her chest unconsciously. Rhys was sitting up in the bed next to her and Feyre was washing up in the bathroom.

Apparently her visit to see Felix had been a success. She came back brighter and happier than Rhys had seen her in a long time. She’d also gone to sleep for the first time in four days, and for that alone Rhys prayed thanks to the Mother.

Feyre was worried though. It had been five hours since she had gone to sleep and she had yet to do any of the things she had been doing for the past month and a half. She hadn’t yet cried in her sleep or screamed or thrashed - she was just hugging his pillow to her chest and sleeping.

 _Is she still breathing?_ Feyre had asked him the same question through the bond at least ten times now. He always checked though.

He leaned over his daughter to listen. He could hear her heartbeat – unsteady, but that was to be expected – and her intake and exhale of breaths. Which were, delightedly, even.

 _Yes, she’s still breathing_. He answered her. Feyre came out of the bathroom in long sleeved pyjamas that matched the ones their daughter was wearing.

She crawled into bed and onto Rhys’ lap. He wrapped his arms around her and she settled herself into his chest.

“Wake me up if she starts crying,” Feyre whispered.

It had been like this nearly every night since Azriel and Felix found Eleana in that cave. One of them would stay awake and watch over her and the other would try and sleep as well. At first, when the dreams had been so bad that Eleana would sleep-winnow around the house and accidently crash into things, Rhys tried to get into her mind to control her dreams. Her shield was too tight though, they had taught her too well. Even if right now her other magic failed her at least they didn’t have to worry about a daemati taking her mind.

“I see her,” Feyre continued, “and it’s like when he came home after vanquishing Amarantha. Do you remember how bad we were? And now she’s going through the same thing. _Fuck_ , I don’t know how to help her, Rhys. She’s wasting away and I have no idea what to do about it.”

Rhys kissed the top of his mate’s head. “Right now all you can do is sleep. We’ll fix this a day at a time, no matter how long it takes. She’ll be fine, I know it for a fact. Sleep, Feyre Darling, and in the morning we’ll try again.”

Feyre closed her eyes and it didn’t take long for her to fall into the embrace of sleep. Next to each other like this, Feyre and Eleana looked exactly the same. They scrunched their nose the same way when they slept, both angled their limbs in the same way. Rhys loved seeing his wife shine through their daughter in the unexpected little ways.

When Azriel had summoned him and he saw his brother holding Eleana’s broken body in his hands… Rhys thought he might die. If something happened to his baby then he would’ve died. When he and Feyre brought her back to Velaris and brought in healers to help her, Feyre had sobbed while they described her injuries. Her broken ribs, the stab wounds, everything else, and the escalation with her wings.

Then it was three days until Eleana woke up again, and when she did she was so weak. Rhys will never forget her voice when she asked about her wings and Feyre had to tell her they were destroyed.

As if on cue, Eleana’s eyelids fluttered and she woke up with a tear running down her face.

“Hey there,” Rhys whispered as he brushed the tear away.

Eleana didn’t say anything, just shoved away the pillow and curled up against him instead.

“Father?” She looked up at him with red rimmed eyes and a frown he could see she was trying to fight away.

“Yes, my little butterfly?”

“Can you take me flying?” She sniffled.

He had been wondering when she would ask.

“Nothing would make me happier,”

 

 

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

Watching Felix train really was something. It baffled Eleana how one person can be so powerful without magic. Not that Felix didn’t have magic, he had an abundance at his disposal, but the way he leashed himself so that he didn’t need anything other than his physical power to defeat his enemies was equal parts horrifying and astounding.

Right now he was fighting against Kaden and Azriel.

It was two against one and Kaden and Azriel were doing everything they could to take down Felix. They all had swords - the real deal, no wooden training swords here - and Felix was deflecting every single blow that was coming his way. It may not seem like much, but Azriel was one of the finest fighters in Prythian and Kaden improved more and more every day.

And yet it still wasn’t enough.

Eleana looked at him in awe. She had seen him train plenty of times over the seven years she’d lived in this camp, but never had it been like this. Eleana hoped she’d never be in a situation where she had to fight him. Magic or no, there was no way she could defeat someone like this.

Felix took the offensive on Kaden and soon enough her mate had to bow out. He may have been mocked stabbed to death, but he was smiling as he stepped out of the ring. That left Azriel and Felix squaring off. They both paused and smiled at each other, in the way where it was obvious they were happy that they hadn’t yet defeated the other. Less than a second after the affectionate smiles they charged.

“Rather impressive, isn’t it?” Kaden walked over to her. He shook out his hair and sat down next to her on the log she was sitting on. Logs made up a circle that surrounded the fighting pit - a place for spectators to sit.

“There’s no way I could ever fight him,” She leaned into him and closed her eyes. She didn’t mind that he was covered in sweat or that he was hot to touch, she just liked taking advantage of the fact that she could touch him at all.

Her visits to see Kaden and Felix were becoming more and more frequent, but she had yet to sleep properly yet. There were a few things that helped, like coming here and flying with her father, but her dreams about what happened still plagued her.

Kaden wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “I haven’t seen you in two weeks, how have you been?”

The last time she had visited, three days ago, and all the other times in the past two weeks, someone had winnowed her in only for her to find Kaden gone. He was training with Azriel and hadn’t had a chance to see her. Felix was often there, sometimes not, and she would just hang around the share houses until someone came to collect her. She brought it on herself - she never warned them when she was coming so she couldn’t be mad when she turned up and they weren’t there.

“I sleep for four hours most nights. My father thinks soon we’ll be able to take the wards away from their room.” More wards on the house, this time so she didn’t accidentally destroy something with her magic. Her father put them up after she winnowed in her sleep her first week home and she’d hurtled into a window and smashed it.

“I would take the wards as a compliment. Not any old fae would need wards from the most powerful High Lord in history just to be grounded.” He squeezed her shoulder and blanched as Azriel and Felix’s swords clanged together.

“How is your training with Az going? Any fancy tricks to show me?” She opened her eyes and turned her gaze to look at him. She expected to see him intently watching Az and Felix, or maybe a smile while he jokes, but she didn’t expect him to look… guilty?

“Ah, yes. My training. It’s swell. Very, um, lots of punching and magic and stuff.” He nodded to confirm his words.

Before Eleana could reply Felix let out a whoop of joy. Azriel was lying face down on the ground and Felix had his sword at the bottom of his spine. “Ha! Best of three?” He pulled his sword away and Az rolled over. He had a grin as wide as the one on Felix’s face and accepted the hand Felix held out to help him up.

“I wish I had time, but Kaden and I need to leave.” Azriel gave Felix a Look. Felix then looked over at Kaden and gave him the same one. A Look Eleana didn’t really understand.

Kaden stood up and walked away from Eleana without looking back at her. She could see him though, and the guilt was still on his face.

“Can I come?” She asked.

All three males turned to her - almost as though they had forgotten she was there at all.

“I don’t think that would be wise, Laya.” Az said the same time Felix said, “why don’t you join me for lunch?”

“I promise I’ll keep up.” She jumped up from where she was and skipped over to them.

Azriel put a very obviously fake smile on his face. “Not today. I’m afraid you aren’t quite there yet, but once you are you are free to come along.”

“I’ll be fine, the fresh air would be good for me anyway,” that and she wanted to know why Kaden looked at her like that. Her boots scuffed along the ground as she neared them.

“I don’t want you leaving the camp, and that’s exactly what we’re going to do,” Azriel took a step away from her. He had a hand clenched in the back of Kaden’s shirt - the way he held Felix’s when he was about to winnow them - so Kaden also retreated from her.

“But I-”

“No, Laya.” Az deadpanned.

“Okay,” she flinched back from him. Azriel rarely used that tone with her, it was reserved for his soldiers, or worse, her father and Cassian when they pissed him off.

“This isn’t something that you need to be involved with.” He asserted.

“Alright. I guess I’ll summon someone to take me home.” She said. She wasn’t mad, just confused.

Felix must’ve seen her confusion as he stepped away from the other males and towards her.

“No, don’t do that. Come have lunch with me, I’m usually stuck having lunch with that prick and it’s getting old quick,” He jerked his head towards Kaden and walked over to her. He had a grin on his face, so she knew he was joking. He placed his hand on her shoulder and turned her away from Kaden and Azriel. “We haven’t had a real talk in ages, and I miss you. I won’t even make you eat with the kids.” He guided her away from her uncle and mate and towards his home.

“Will you cook for me? I miss your fruit tarts more than I miss you,” she bantered.

Felix seemed relieved at her answer and when she looked back Kaden and Azriel were gone.

______

 

“I feel guilty for not telling her,” Kaden confessed to Azriel while they waited in the foyer of the mansion at the Spring Court.

“Where under strict orders from High Lord Rhysand and High Lady Feyre. Laya can’t know what we’re looking for, she’s bad enough already. I don’t need to tell you what the consequences for her health could be if she found out.” Azriel tapped his foot in impatience. Kaden had learnt that Azriel rarely showed these sort of… emotional indicators around people. However the more time Kaden spent with the shadowsinger the more things Azriel let him see.

“But what if I can’t find it-”

“I’ve told you a million times that you can find anything. We just have to keep working - it’s harder to find things that don’t want to be found.”

“To what do I owe this pleasure?” High Lord Glaslane approached them from behind. He looked regal in his fine red clothes and flowers braided in his blond hair. Kaden had never met the infamous High Lord Tamlin, but Azriel had told him before they came that Glaslane was an exact copy. In his words, _“If you think Cassian and Felix look alike then boyo you’d be shocked if you saw Tamlin and Glaslane. Thankfully their personalities aren’t the same as their appearance.”_

“With your permission we’d like to search your lands.” Azriel got straight to the point. They were on too tight of a time crunch to waste time with pleasantries.

“May I ask why?” Ever polite was the High Lord of the Spring Court. Apparently, nothing like his father. That probably had to do with the fact he was mostly raised by High Lord Lucien and his mate Lady Elain. Kaden was told never to let his guard down though. He may have been raised well and considered a son to Lady Elain and High lord Lucien but he wasn’t idiot - he was the kind of cunning his father never managed to successfully be.

“We’re looking for something rather sensitive on the order of High Lady Feyre and High Lord Rhysand. I’m sure you can understand why we can’t reveal much more.” Azriel told him. Kaden envied his seamless way of dealing with superiors. Kaden just became a babbling fool.

High Lord Glaslane hummed in acknowledgment. He looked them both up and down and nodded. “Of course. My lands are always open to friends. I hope you find what you’re looking for.”

Of course Kaden and Azriel would’ve searched without his approval, but it was nice to know they wouldn’t have to fight any sentries today.

_____

 

Eleana lied down on Felix’s couch while he made her food. He pretended that it was a taxing activity but he hummed and danced around the kitchen. He’d always loved cooking and Eleana was glad that he was able to do it as often as he liked.

“We should probably talk,” She yelled to him.

“About anything in particular?” The smell of his cooking was intoxicating, and Eleana’s stomach let out an audible growl.

“About something I should’ve talked to you about months ago.” Eleana got up from the couch and joined Felix in the kitchen.

He was conjuring up a cake, a risotto, as well as the fruit tarts Eleana had mentioned before. Eleana had loved his kitchen from the moment Felix had gotten this house. He had made this space warm and inviting as well as perfectly functional for a budding cook. It matched the kitchen Nesta had in her townhouse in Velaris – all rustic timbers and blue detailing.

“I’m an open book, ask away.” He carried a bowl from his woodfire stove over to the bench opposite him without looking at her.

“We need to talk about what the Impeath showed you Under the Mountain.”

Felix stopped stirring the batter in front of him and put his wooden spoon down. He braced his hands on the bench and his shoulders tensed.

“We’re not talking about this,” he turned his back on her and left the kitchen.

Eleana followed a step behind him. His wings weren’t tucked in so she had to sidestep them every time he changed direction.

“We should have talked about it after it happened, but then everything happened with me and - and I feel like we forgot your pain.” Eleana reach a hand out to him but he shrugged her away.

“Forget about it, Laya. It has nothing to do with you.” He sat down on an armchair opposite the couch she had been resting on and buried his face in his hands. Eleana asking about the Impeath must have brought up hard memories, and guilt ate at her as she thought of him going through it alone.

“It does have something to do with me if you’re afraid of your parents, Felix. Is it something trivial like you’re afraid they’ll get hurt? Please, reassure me that I don’t have to worry about my family.” She knelt down in front of his and rested her chin on his knees.

“That’s not it. They can protect themselves, I’m well aware of that. Laya, please. I can’t talk about this. I can’t say it out loud, if I do then it becomes real and _I can’t_. I would never pressure you to talk about something that’s happened to you, so please don’t ask again.”

“I don’t like the thought of you dealing with this on your Felix. I feel like it’s my fault-”

“Don’t,” He lifted his head and looked her in the eyes. “None of what has happened is your fault, Laya.”

“But I don’t understand-”

“It’s not like with your parents, okay? When you were taken, it's like mine forgot how much pain I was in. You left, and then they left, and there was no one here. I could barely walk, and they just _left_ me here. The first time Azriel visited after you were taken I was so excited, but he wasn't here for me. He was never here for _me_. But I get it, you know? It’s never been something I’ve misunderstood.” Felix started shaking slightly.

“Felix? What are you talking about?” Her voice shook with concern. This isn’t how she expected him to answer.

“I’ve said too much, that’s not what we’re here for.” He pushed her away and got up to go back to the kitchen.

“Felix, we came here to talk-”

“I think you should go now.” He had his back to her and refused to turn around again.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. We need to talk about it. Whatever it is we can face it together, I’m sure.” She plastered a smile on her face even if he couldn't see it. “I know it might be hard to talk about and I understand that. I know you better than anyone, you’re my best friend, my brother, but I don’t know this and I feel like I need to. I can help you, Felix.”

“No one can help me,” He went back to the kitchen and picked up his spoon again and started stirring. He was looking so intensely at the bowl that Eleana knew his thoughts were elsewhere.

“Felix, please.” She whispered.

“You need to go. Now. If you don’t then I will, and I guarantee I’ll go somewhere you can’t follow.”

He looked defeated, and Eleana knew that he would make good on his promise to leave.

“Fine.”

_____

 

Eleana hoped her whole life wasn’t this dramatic - she was rather tired. She was wondering aimlessly around alone for the first time since the attack, and she was finding it hard to breathe. She kept reminding herself that Illyrians were everywhere - deadly, lethal Illyrians that would kill for her.

She ended up finding herself at her the house she shared with her mother. She hadn’t been here in two months, and neither had her parents. The front door was locked - no surprise there - so she smashed one of the windows to break in. She chose her own window, it may have been on the second level of the house but it was less conspicuous than any of the others. She climbed up the drainpipe and once she’d successfully smashed in the window she crawled into her room. It was exactly as she had left it. Bucket in the corner because she had been painfully drunk, bed sheets unmade, and clothes strewn across the floor. It was covered in a fine layer of dust, but Eleana didn’t mind. She also didn’t mind how dirty her sheets probably were when she climbed into bed to sleep.

Well, try to sleep. Thoughts about Felix and Cassian and Nesta kept bugging her. She had known them her whole life and they had never been anything less than a loving, supportive family. Why Felix would be so afraid of them for the Impeath to choose that to show him confounded her.

She also felt like a terrible cousin. After they went Under the Mountain she had fully intended to ask him about it and make him explain but an opportunity didn’t arise. Instead she found herself in an even worse situation than before. She hated to admit it, but she forgot about the Impeath attack until today. She was instead clouded by dreams of the creature that took her. She didn’t even know what it actually was!

Eleana wasn’t going to get anything productive done lying around in bed waiting for sleep. She had slept already today, and she was wasting time. If she couldn’t get answers from Felix then she would find someone else to tell her something. Her immediate thought was to ask Kaden, but he was busy gallivanting with Azriel.

Who else could she ask?

“Oh!” She said aloud as the thought sprung to her.

People who spent a lot of time with Felix, who he might accidentally let something slip to, and would speak to her.

Eleana was going to ask the children Felix took care of in the share houses.   


_____

 

“ _Fuck_!” Kaden slammed his fist into the cavern wall. “It’s not here,” he groaned.

Azriel looked around the cave they were in, eerily similar to the one that Eleana had been trapped in. That’s why they had come here, but it seemed that anything that may have been there was well and truly gone by now.

“We won’t give up. We’ve barely searched the Spring Court - there are many hidden places we have yet to find. It took us two months to look though Autumn and Summer, this will take time as well.” Azriel tried to sooth the boy.

He had never seen Kaden so stressed before, and he knew that their task and the pressure was weighing heavily on him. Azriel believed in him though, he knew the younger bastard would lead them in the right direction.

“But we don’t have time. What if it comes back for her? What if it hurts someone else? I thought I’d killed it.” Kaden cried.

He was leaning now with his head against the wall. One hand held the sword Azriel had gifted to him a month previous and the other was spread on the jaggered rock. Looking at him - the glow that surrounded him when he used his magic, the immaculate leathers, his obvious strength - there was nothing about him that showed his Illyrian heritage. Right now he was as fae as Morrigan - the only other fae Azriel knew to escape Hewn City. Kaden may have avoided being raised in that hell but he’d only grown to face another.

“She’s never left alone, Rhys and Feyre have made sure of that. There’s no chance of it getting anywhere near her. Even when she sleeps she’s watched. Nothing will happen to her. We would all die before that day.” Azriel walked over to him and pulled him away from the wall. Kaden looked stricken. He didn’t understand that it wasn’t his fault the creature that took Eleana had escaped. How was he supposed to know how to kill it when they didn’t even know what the creature was?

“Cassian and Nesta have been researching what the creature is since it took her. Once they find out more it may reduce how much of Prythian we need to search, but right now complaining about what we can’t change truly is a waste.” Azriel continued.

Kaden let out a heavy breath and nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, my boy. We still have hours of daylight left and I suggest we move on - there’s nothing for us here. Do you agree?” Azriel may be Rhys’s spymaster, but right now it was Kaden who he let make the decisions. Kaden was the one with the ability to see things Azriel could never dream of seeing and therefore he was the one Azriel let take the lead. Rhys and Feyre had no idea Az was working with the young fae, but they rarely knew about his accomplices and spies.

“Agreed.”

______

It wasn’t long before Eleana was bursting into the sharehouse and looking for children. Her logic was simple - Felix may have said something, whether it was to Kaden or to someone else she didn’t know, and one of the children may have overheard it. They were so young and innocent that they wouldn’t comprehend the possibility of a secret so they wouldn’t know not to tell her if she asked. It also helped that she was Feyre’s daughter. Feyre had joined her on her last visit to the house and Eleana had seen first-hand how much Feyre is adored among these younglings.

Eleana went past the first hallway and kitchen - both of which were basically empty. The only person Eleana had seen so far was the maid, who was cleaning up the mess made from lunch. She could hear the ruckus they were making form the next room though.

“Eleana?” A girl called for her when she opened the door. It was one of the children who always listened to Kaden and Felix read. Felix had explained to Eleana that she loved books, but she had a disorder that meant whenever she looked at words the letters got jumbled around and she couldn't read them. It was something they were trying to combat, but it was hard to try and find a solution when really they had no idea what was going on. That seemed to be a common theme in Eleana’s life.

“Hello, Thea.” Eleana was happy she ran into this girl. She worshipped the ground her cousin and mate walked on, so if anyone was to overhear something it would be her.

“Is Felix here?” She said innocently. She had a little smile on her face and her hands behind her back. She was swaying back and forth slightly and was tapping her feet together.

“Not today, I’m afraid. Although, I would love to ask you a question about him.” Eleana held out her hand for her to take, which she gladly did. Eleana had no doubt that the love for her mother extended to her by default. She usually uses that unquestionable love to help them, and she felt the teensiest of guilt of using it for extortion.  

“Okay,”

Eleana led her to the bay window. She sat up on it and pulled the ten year old with her. Thea really was quite cute. She had a very obvious crush on Felix and Kaden and Eleana found it to be adorable. Her cousin and mate had no idea - neither were well versed in understanding the emotions of females.

“Have you ever heard Felix say anything unusual, maybe about his parents, to Kaden? Something you didn’t understand?”

Thea turned her back to Eleana so that she could start braiding her black hair. It was something Eleana often did for the girls who lived here. She remembered fondly how Kaden was better at it then her. In his words it was because no male can call himself a solider if they can’t tie a simple knot.

“Not really. Well, besides the book thing, but Kaden told me that’s just because Felix is weird.”

This struck Eleana as peculiar. Felix was many things, but a reader wasn’t one of them. “What book thing?” Eleana continued to braid while she asked.

“It’s just one of the books we have on our shelf. Felix kept taking it but wouldn’t read it to anyone.” Thea explained to Eleana.

“Which book?” Eleana finished with her hair and placed a quick kiss on the top of her head. Thea turned around, beamed at her and jumped up.

“I’ll get it for you!” Thea ran to the bookshelves covering the largest wall and pulled out an old, leather bound novel. She brought it back over to Eleana and held it out for her.

This was a book Eleana was all too familiar with - she had a copy at her home as well. It was a book of faerie tales and myths, the book where she had first heard about the Impeath. She still remembers when she was so small that she could effortlessly sit in her father’s lap and be surrounded by his magic. He would rest his head on top of hers and hold the book in front of them. It was his job to read and her job to turn the pages.

She may be back in Velaris, but her life hadn’t been like that since she’d left as a child.

Eleana flicked through the pages. The story about the Impeath had been tagged at the corner by Felix but no marks were on the page itself. It was exactly how Eleana had remembered it - there was even an illustration showing the creature that attacked and nearly killed Felix.

“Thank you, Thea.” Eleana smiled at the child and stood up as well. She tucked the book under her arm and moved away from the window. “I have to go now, but I’ll visit soon. It was lovely to see you.” Eleana said genuinely.

She left before the child could say anymore. She planned to read the story again in private and see if there were details that she had forgotten about. Normally in a case like this she would’ve gone to Felix’s house to read. That wasn’t really an option right now, so when she left the house she veered towards the direction of her own.

As she walked she read through some of the stories. She didn’t have to worry about where she was going, her instincts would guide her like they did when she had her eyes closed.

Impeaths, fire drakes, wyverns, centaurs, collodens -

Colloden.

This was a story that Eleana had never read before. It was about a fae who was born as beautiful as a summer’s day and as lovely as a rose in spring. One day the fae fell in love with someone that he shouldn’t have, a maid working in his family castle. They loved each other endlessly and hopelessly and hoped that they could escape the fae’s domineering father. The fae would send gifts to his lover to show how much he loved the maid, and they were always gratefully received. It all went askew though when the father found out about the love between the fae and the maid and cursed his son so that his love turned to sorrow and darkness. The maid, desperate to save the fae, tried dark, otherworldly magic to return him to his previous self. The magic was so evil though that it clashed with the fae’s pure heart and distorted it until there was nothing left of the fae and it became something else entirely. The ornamental boxes that were used to send the maid wondrous gifts now held horrors of an unspeakable variety. The maid scarified itself in an attempt to win the Cauldron’s favor and restore its love to normal, but its sacrifice was in vain. The fae remained eternally cursed to roam the land and kill for his lover – a lover that’s ghost chased after it, sending its victims to the afterlife.

The fae became a Colloden.

Every story had an illustration, and this one was no different. Expect what was in the picture was no tale or story.

No, it was the creature that had taken Eleana all those weeks ago. Her mother had drawn pictures like this from the description Felix - which he had gotten from Kaden - gave her and they were a perfect match.

“Cauldron,” Eleana couldn’t take her eyes off of it.

Eleana didn’t care that Felix didn’t want to see her. She may not have been able to fly to his home, but she could still run.

_____

“I feel like we’re getting nowhere. I don’t want to give up but this seems pointless.” Kaden resigned.

He threw a wooden box he found across the clearing. It was nothing like the boxes that had been sent to faeries from the creature - it was just a box. Kaden didn’t understand why he had been led here in the first place. Where they were was nowhere special, nowhere as near as close as they he and Azriel had come before.

“We’re done for today, anyway. We’ll come back tomorrow and try again.”

Azriel was observing him from a small distance away and Kaden wished he wouldn’t. It was bad enough that he was aware of his inadequacies already, he didn’t want to reiterate them.

“You care about her a lot,” Azriel noted.

Kaden clenched his jaw. “She’s my friend. You’d do the same for yours.”

“Of course.” Azriel whispered.

Whenever Azriel looked at Kaden he felt an overwhelming sadness enter him. This boy, like him in so many ways, who cared so deeply about others when he had never been cared for himself. It made Azriel wonder what his life would have been like if he was as open with his emotions when he was Kaden’s age.

_____

Eleana banged on Felix’s door. Usually she would’ve burst in, but it was warded so that people Felix didn’t want to see were barred from entering. Right now she was _definitely_ one of those people.

“Felix? Felix! Open the door, I need your help.”

It was only a second before he was yanking the door open. “What’s wrong?” He grabbed her by the arm and pulled her into his house. He had a dagger raised and stepped out onto his veranda to see what was wrong.

“You can put the dagger away, this is good news!”

He turned to her with a raised eyebrows. He looked her up and down, and noting that she didn’t have any physical injuries, lowered the dagger as she’d asked. He was likely skeptical - it had been a while since anything that constituted ‘good news’ had happened.

Eleana was out of breath from her run and her knees were wobbly. Felix closed the door and guided her to the couch to sit.

Eleana remembered the story Kaden had told her about Felix and his dalliances with this couch, and thought she probably shouldn’t sit. Oh well, it was too late now.

“I hope you clean this couch,” She scrunched up her nose.

“Of course I clean the bloody couch.” He scoffed. “Now, why did you come screaming to my door demanding my help?”

He sat down next to her and leant back.

“I found this,” she held up the book for him to see.

He picked it out of her hands and examined it. “It’s a book.”

“Yes, it’s a book. Not any book though. I know you’ve read it.”

“I believe I have, yes. I just wanted to reread the story about the Impeath, no big deal. There’s nothing in there we don’t already know - not that it matters all that much.” Felix told her. He handed her back the book without care and got up. “Be honest with me, was this just a ploy to come back? If so, it’s not needed. I’m sorry for reacting the way I did. It was rather… overly dramatic.”

He did look genuinely guilty. Eleana didn’t know though whether that was because he’d kicked her out or because he’d face the wrath of their parents and Az if they found out.

“No, it’s not that. We won’t address that now but - when you’re ready to talk about it I’m here. Don’t think for a second I care any less about your wellbeing than you do mine.” She stood up with him only for him to usher her down again.

He left the room to then come back with a plate of tarts and a jug of water. Felix would never let food go to waste, fight or no.

“What’s so special about the book then? Hundreds of them exist - you have one yourself.” He sat down next to her again and served them each some tarts and water. He took a bite of tart and smiled to himself at the taste.

“It’s not the book in particular, rather the contents.” Eleana flicked open to the page about the colloden. She handed it over to him again to study.

Felix was much less nonchalant about the book this time. He took so long reading it that she was sure he had read it over and over just to make sure he was digesting the words right.

“Holy shit,” he said under his breath.

“I know. I couldn’t believe it when I saw it.” She beamed at him. “Felix, I don’t think it’s a coincidence that these two creatures happened to pop up out of the blue at the same time. What if something bigger is going on?”

“We need to go to Velaris. Right Now.”

“Do you have same idea that I do?”

“To tell my mother and father?”

“I was going to say break into Amren’s apartment so I could contact her in her dreams and get her to come home and help us, but that’s good to.”

Felix pursed his lips. “No, you’re idea is better. Let’s go.”

_____

Felix winnowed them straight to the front door of Amren’s apartment in the city. Neither of them had seen Amren since she left with Varian over a year ago on a much deserved holiday.

“Do you think she’ll be mad?” Eleana asked Felix.

“Hopefully not mad enough to hang us up by our entrails. Do you think you can break the seal?” Felix was referring to the magic Amren had put on her apartment so no one could enter. All Eleana would need to make a connection between the two was a meaningful possession of Amren’s, which were all stored away in her home.

Felix was pushing his shoulder against the door as he tried to open it. She could tell he was also using magic but it was to no avail - it wouldn't budge.

“I can try, but don’t get your hopes us.” Her confidence in her idea was starting to waver.

She needed Amren to come home if she was to tell her parents what she thought took her. To this day they didn’t believe that they had gone Under the Mountain or faced an Impeath. The only person that could confirm what they saw was Amren - she was the only one who had been alive before they’d gone supposedly extinct.

Eleana switched positions with Felix. Rather than ramming into the door like he had she poured every ounce of magic she had into it. Light tendrils wrapped around the door and Eleana started to glow slightly from her magic. It was the same technique she had used to try and get Under the Mountain, but with a lot less dexterity.

She poured more in, as much as she could, and it didn’t take long for her to hear a faint click and for the dour to open slightly.

She looked at her cousin triumphantly.

They entered Amren’s apartment and Felix lit the lamps with his flames. Both had only been there a handful of times, but not even that could prepare them for all the clutter. Amren had possessions scattered everywhere, mostly jewellery, mostly from Eleana’s father.

“How do we know which one to choose?” Felix asked as he sidestepped her to start searching Amren’s belongings. Eleana hoped that the situation was dire enough for Amren to forgive them for searching through her stuff.

“I don’t know.” Eleana replied honestly. If she wanted to take something from the apartment to use she would need something that had real sentimental value to Amren. Everything in here…

Well, Amren had a lot of stuff.

“Why don’t you try to contact her while we’re here? I’ll keep guard and make sure nothing happens.” Felix suggested.

It was a better idea than anything she could think of. “Okay. Hold on, I’ll lie down. Don’t let anyone in.”

Eleana rarely used her ability to dream walk. It left her utterly defenseless and vulnerable - understandably a position she didn’t like being in.

Felix sealed the door and added new wards.

Eleana lied down on the floor, surrounded by Amren’s clutter, and closed her eyes. She opened her mind to Amren’s and using the essence of Amren attached to the objects she reached out with her mind and tried to sleep. She breathed deeply while focusing on her formidable aunt.

When she opened her eyes again she was no longer in Velaris. Actually, she was in a place she wasn’t sure existed at all. It was a dense rainforest. Water dropped from leaves as large as Eleana herself and there was an endless buzzing and croaking from unseen animals. It was night and the only light came from a moon three times the size it should be and an abundance of fireflies.

“Hello, youngling.” Eleana turned to be met with the steel gaze of her aunt.

_____

Once he got back to Velaris, Azriel decided to walk home rather than fly or winnow. He needed the space to think, to sort through his feelings about the day’s events. He got lost in time though, and it wasn’t long before he felt the warmth of his wife sit down next to him. He was resting on the beach, drawing patterns in the sand and occasionally throwing rocks into the thrashing ocean. It was after dark before his wife found him and he knew that it was likely she knew where he was all along and decided to give him time to himself.

“How did today go?” She leaned her head on his shoulder and wrapped her hands around him arm. Like the way he traced patterns into the sand, she traced the veins on his arms and the tattoos on his shoulder.

“He’s such a wonderful young man despite everything. They’d be quite cute together.” He hung his head in shame.

“Have you thought about telling him the truth? That boy has no family, I’m sure he’d be thrilled.” Mor said tenderly. She kissed his cheek.

“It’s just – he’s so different from the first time I met him. He was such a small child and was always hiding away. It astounds me that he can be this way after what his family put him through.” His voice was strained from the effort of trying to contain his emotion.

Mor grazed his cheek with her thumb though, and he became undone. Only for her could he show so much, only for her could he risk it.

“How am I supposed to tell him that he is my nephew? That my ghastly brother is his father and I knew this _whole time_ that he had a bastard son and did _nothing_ about it. How can I stand in front of this boy and claim to be the family he’s always wanted when I turned a blind eye to what was going on?” Azriel pressed his palms into his eyes in an attempt not to cry. “He’s truly a fine young man, and he and Eleana would be perfect together. He’d be the light to her darkness. I can see it the way I saw Feyre and Rhys before they mated. The way I always wanted it to be with you. It’s my fault he won’t be with her. If I had interfered sooner, or taken him when I realised he existed-”

“Shush, Azriel.” Mor placed a single finger on his lips to stop him from talking. “You saw that boy _once_ and had no idea what was being done to him. You cannot change the past, Azriel. Hell, if we could I would’ve married you centuries earlier. We all make mistakes, and now all we can do is help him heal.”

Azriel kissed her finger and linked their hands.

“I don’t know what to do. I just want to steal him away and bring him to Velaris and show him what it could’ve been like. When I look at him and Felix? I see Cassian and me, and me and Rhys, and Rhys and Cassian and _fuck_ I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to _do_ -”

“Az, stop.” She pressed her face against his cheek. “We can tell him together, if you’d like. Not necessarily soon, but one day. In the mean time we can do other things from him. Firstly we need to get him out of that bloody tent.”

Azriel turned his head so their foreheads were touching. He closed his eyes and breathed in her comforting scent. He would thank the Mother every day for bringing him this woman.

“He looks so much like me and my brothers. Not the hair or skin or eyes, but the other things. He has my father’s nose and my brother’s brow and hands. How different they look when they are used peacefully. I wonder who his mother is. He told me she is from Hewn City and gave him up, and I have no doubt my brother would spin a tale that fanciful to cover up his origin. Maybe it’s true, but I doubt it.”

“That’s what we’ll do then. You continue to train him, and care for him,” she kissed his forehead, “and love him the way you love our other nieces and nephews, and I’ll go to Hewn City and see if his mother is there. If she’s not, then that rules out at least some of the fae in Prythian.” Mor turned light-hearted. “Baby of Starfall - what a peculiar boy he is.”

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

“Hello, youngling.” Eleana turned to be met with the steel gaze of her aunt.

Amren stood in front of her, unchanged from her last ten thousand years of existence in this body.

“Amren,” Eleana breathed. She felt a deep sense of relief knowing that she as able to contact her most lucrative aunt with her faltering magic, or even that Amren was asleep when she tried. Amren was cauldron knows where - it would be impossible to discern what time she had found herself in. 

“What brings you to my dreams? I can assure you, they are not something you’ll find enjoyable.” Amren purred. 

“I need your help, and I hoped that you would forgive for any intrusion if the situation was dire enough.” Eleana stepped towards her aunt with her hands clasped in front of her. 

“And is it?” Amren ran a hand down one of the large leaves next to her - swiping away the water. 

“What do you know about Impeaths?”

Amren raised her eyebrows and smirked. “What an unusual line of questioning. I can tell you that they are extinct and you needn’t worry about such a tale.”

“Let’s say hypothetically they still existed and you had to warn someone about them. What then would you say to me?” Eleana probed. 

“I would tell you they are terrible creatures that are hard to find and harder to catch. They’re a very distant cousin to the elves, although one would never know it if not told. They are small but powerful – they would only be as tall as your knees.”

Eleana blanched. “How can that possibly be? The storybook I had as a child-”

“Was written by High Lords who didn’t want their courts to know that such a small, forgettable creature is what nearly brought Prythian to its knees.” Amren’s grey eyes glittered. “Why do you ask such questions? I was under the impression that the situation was dire, especially if you felt the need to ransack my home.” 

“I – I, I’m sorry. I saw something that was like the Impeath I saw in my book. I knew you could help me, but it seems that I was wrong.” Eleana’s face fell. She had been so wrong. So, so wrong. “What do you know about Collodens?” She asked in a last ditch attempt.

“There’s only ever been the one, and he is long dead.”

“Did you see him? After he had turned?” Slight hope in her voice.

“That is not a time I like discussing, and much too dark for you, youngling. I will tell you this: the tale told about him in that children’s book of yours is far more accurate than the one about Impeaths. His name was Iian.” Amren got a far away look in her eyes that Eleana had never seen her aunt have.

“How did he die?” Eleana was going that her aunt would say he hadn’t, if only to make Eleana seem less crazy. 

“It was horrible by most people’s standards. They tried a lot before anything worked, and even then they had to mist the burnt remnants of his body before we could be sure he was actually gone.”

Definitely dead then. Also not like the one Eleana had thought attacked her. It had been killed with a simple beheading. 

Amren’s eyes perked up again and she gave Eleana a feline grin. “If that is all I would like my mind back now. You should be off preparing for Starfall - it’s only a week away and you know your father and mother are obsessed with the sickening event.”

Starfall.

Eleana had forgotten that it was so soon.

Her mother said that on Starfall Eleana could get her wings back, and a longing so strong that the dream became hazy overcame her. 

“One last thing, Laya.” Amren’s voice shook - not from uncertainty or nervousness but because the dream was coming to an abrupt end. “Never break into my home again, or you will suffer the consequences.”

_____

 

Felix watched as Eleana gasped awake. He ran to her side and held her shoulders down while she thrashed. “Laya? What happened?”

“We were wrong,” she gasped, “it’s not an Impeath that attacked you. Or a Colloden that attacked me.” Her answer came out in deep gulps of breath.

“What do you mean?” He was scanning her body for injuries. He knew that she couldn’t have suffered any in the dream state but he still checked. It was a habit he had since he was a child and he’d been presented with her as a baby. See Eleana, make sure she was okay, then continue with your business. Never mind that it was often him who instigated shenanigans that left them harmed. 

She sat up and covered her eyes with her hands. “They were nothing but stories. I thought Amren would confirm that what we’d seen was an Impeath, but all she proved was that our parents were right. _Cauldron,_ I’m so stupid Felix.”

“Tell me what she said. Exactly.” 

Eleana explained to him Amren’s brief descriptions of both the creatures. 

“Laya,” Felix laughed in relief. He thought that her panic meant that they had hit a dead end when it came to figuring out if she was right when she thought there was something bigger behind the attacks. “Don’t you see? These creatures were told to us as children so that we’d be too scared to misbehave. Whatever is doing the same now is just doing so on a grander scale and the only thing they have to go off is a few millennia old faerie tales. This is something we can work with, Laya.” 

Surety settled over him as he helped his cousin to her feet. 

“Where do we start? Should we tell someone?” Eleana, as talented as she was, had no experience in espionage.

“Not yet. Let’s gather as much information as we can and then present it to our fathers and Az like we would if we were any other soldier with a concern. I think you’re right - I think there’s something a lot bigger going on here and I am determined to find out what.”

“Then let’s go,”

“There is one person who I think we should tell.” He said slowly.

“Who?” 

“Kaden, of course. Who else but my third favourite bastard?”

_____

 

A week passed and it was the dawn of Starfall. Eleana hadn't slept, and neither had either of her parents. They were all eagerly awaiting the healer that was to inspect her wings that morning and tell them if they’re ready to be remade by Feyre. 

Feyre looked at her daughter flittering around the house. She was cleaning random objects and fiddling with things just to preoccupy her mind. Feyre didn't mind watching her, Eleana had always been a whirlwind. While Eleana flittered around Feyre sat with her side pressed against Rhys’ and a cup of steaming tea in her hand. At some point she should probably change out of her pyjamas, but she didn’t really care. The healer was coming to them and she’d seen Feyre in a lot more concerning states than informal dress. 

“The suns up, why isn't the healer here?” Eleana muttered under her breath. Feyre doubted she was meant to hear it, but she answered anyway.

“She’ll be here soon. Come, sit down. I’m positive that she’ll tell us it’s the perfect time to give you your wings back.” 

Eleana still looked pained and continued to dote around the house.

Rhys looked at Eleana fondly. Feyre knew he had enjoyed immensely them both being home again, and she snuggled further into his body. She missed him so much that it hurt her sometimes. A her worst, the days when she would cry and hug the clothes he’d left behind to her chest and barely leave her room, he would sense her and come straight away. 

Just as Feyre was going to talk to her daughter again, a knock was heard form the door. Eleana’s eyes widened and she gasped in joy. Rhys laughed lightly as she bolted to the door and ushered the healer in as quickly as she could. 

The healer was the same fae who had looked as Cassian’s wings all those years ago. The same healer Rhys had been seeing since he was a child. 

Eleana stepped off her jumper and showed her threadbare wings to the healer through the slits in her shirt. The healer hummed as she inspected the wings and Feyre couldn’t tell if she was happy or displeased with the sight.

Feyre had vomited the first time she saw her daughter wings - they were worse than Cassian’s ever were. 

They were nothing but thin bones. All the membrane had either been stripped away by the creature that took her or couldn’t be salvaged and had to be removed. They were deformed at the curve from the claws being cut off. Eleana’s wings had been the richest purple and deepest red, but what was left was a sickly black. They had also become infected from whatever poison the creature had used to knock her unconscious. No one could determine what poison it was, so they had no choice but to bleed it out - further marring the remnants of her wings. 

The healer looked over at Rhys and Feyre, who were now standing. Rhys had his arm around Feyre’s waist and she was clinging to it in anticipation. 

The healer nodded.

Feyre cried out in relief and moved away from her mate to embrace her daughter. Eleana was jumping up and down in excitement and threw herself into Feyre’s arms.

“Can we do it now?” She asked feverishly.

“Of course!” Feyre looked over to see Rhys thanking the healer and subtly ushering her away. 

Feyre looked over Eleana’s wing again. She studied them closely, silently marking every area she would have to work on.

Feyre made Eleana sit on a stool and pull her shirt over her head so her back was fully exposed but front was covered. Eleana sat up as straight as she could. Rhys pulled up a stool beside her so he could hold her hand. 

Feyre’s magic came out in black wisps that formed around and distorted Eleana’s ruined wings. The wisps turned into a fuller shape resembling Illyrians wings and that’s when Feyre went in for the finer details. Feyre had watched her beautiful girl grow up and there wasn't an inch of her wings she was unfamiliar with - she'd certainly painted them enough times. She started with the colour, wanting to get the purple and red gradient _just_ right. The thing about Illyrian wings was that their true colour didn’t shine though unless they were extended in the wind and sun. Rhys’s were a lovely navy with gold running through them, Azriel’s similar except it was black with a deep green. All wings looked the same from a distance, but Feyre had an artist’s eye and always noted the minuscule differences. 

As sickening as it was, she still had the claws from her wings that had been sent to Feyre and Rhys the night Eleana was taken. It wouldn’t be hard to integrate them back into the wings Feyre was shaping for her daughter. 

“You feeling okay?” Rhys leaned in and asked his daughter.

“I just want it to be over,” Eleana whispered. 

“It will be soon, I promise. You don’t have a choice, really. It’s awfully boring having to fly places myself. I miss my favourite escort.” Rhys joked. He was trying to distract Eleana, and Feyre loved him for it. 

“Oh please. You’re probably dreading having people see how much better at flying I am then you. Imagine having to tell people your seventeen year old is better at something you’ve been doing for all seventy thousand years of your life.”

“I’m not that old,” Rhys snorted.

“You could’ve fooled me.” Eleana smirked. 

“The _sass_! Where have you learned such things?”

“I believe there is one particular person I inherited my dramatic flare from.”

“Yes, Azriel is rather showy, isn't he? Sometimes I feel like shaking him and telling him to calm down.”

“Oh, _definitely_ Azriel. Shows far to much emotion if you ask me. Super readable. Very open. You should tell him to hide himself better.”

“I’ve tried, Laya, but alas, not much can be done.” Rhys leaned forward and tugged at her ear, making her yelp. 

“That was rude.”

“Almost as rude as your child insinuating you’re seventy thousand years old.”

As Eleana laughed, Feyre did the final touches on her wings. She made them more solid and come to full fruition.

When she was completely done, Eleana didn’t notice - she was still joking and playing with Rhys. It seemed he had done a bit too well in distracting her.

Feyre put her hands on her daughters shoulder and leaned forward to kiss the back of her head. 

“I’m finished,” She muttered against her hair. 

Eleana went still and the smile slipped from her face. She became very nervous. Rhys, picking up her change in emotion, stood up and held both her hands in his own. “They’re wonderful. Not a single difference from before.”

Eleana swallowed and nodded her head - eyes wide. 

“Let’s go to the roof.” Rhys suggested. “I bet you Cassian’s next pay check that I’ll beat you in a race to the House of Wind.”

Eleana didn’t say anything, just nodded again and let Rhys lead her to the roof. 

It was undeniably chilly, but the sun was still shining and the sky was relatively clear. 

“Go on, try them.” Rhys urged his daughter.

She extended her wings and let the sun shine through them. They were exactly as Feyre had pictured. She had left the scars at the top of her wings though, a reminder of what had happened. 

“They’re just like I remember.” Eleana finally said. She had wrapped her wings around her front so that she could look at them. 

“They’re exquisite.” Rhys stated. He summoned his own wings and extended them out. “Ready to fly?” 

Eleana didn’t answer him, she just soared into the air. 

 

_____

 

“Do it again,” Felix growled. 

Kaden got up and dusted and shook the dirt off his wings. He raised his dagger to Felix again and launched it at him. Felix easily deflected the move though, and Kaden found himself on his arse in the dirt again.

“Again.” 

Kaden tried again, except this time he feigned his throw and skirted so he was behind Felix. It failed again though, as the older male just back kicked him until he was, unsurprisingly, on his arse. 

“Try it like this,” Felix showed him another manoeuvre that Kaden hadn't thought of. “Okay, again.” 

Felix and Kaden tried it over and over again, Kaden unsuccessful every time. The Elite trained everyday and every member had a slot on one day where Felix took them aside separately and trained them one on one. Every member valued and sought after this time. Firstly, because Felix’s input was invaluable, and secondly, because he often brought homemade goods.  

“I think that’s enough,” Felix finally said. Both were sweating heavily and had been fighting since dawn and it was now mid-afternoon.

Technically they were waiting for Azriel to come by and take them to try and find the creature, or Collden as Kaden and Felix now called it, but it seemed the older male wasn't going to come.

“He’s probably busy getting things ready for Starfall.” Felix noted. He turned his back to Kaden and drank heavily form his bottle.  

“I’m sure that’s what it is,” Kaden tried not to let the disappointment of Azriel not coming show in his voice. He rather liked spending time with the male, but he never expected for Azriel to reciprocate it. 

There were plenty of times that Kaden could think of where he had gotten to know someone and considered them friends - or maybe allies is a better term. He thought, as imbecilic as it may be, that he could consider the shadowsginer that. There were elements about Kaden’s magic that he never may have noticed if Azriel hadn’t started training him and taking him on missions to find the Colloden. Kaden had a deep respect for him, and Azriel was someone that he could really rely on and look up to. Kaden had never had a solid male figure in his life, and he was kidding himself if he thought he would ever find one.  

“Whatever his reasoning is he could have at least sent a letter. This is what, his fourth day of not coming unexpectedly? It’s bullshit,” Felix seemed bothered by Azriel’s actions. “I swear he’s never been like this before. I’ll ask him tonight what’s going on. There’s no way he’ll miss Uncle Rhys’ party and Eleana’s presentation.” 

Just another thing to be worried about - if Eleana’s new wings were a success or failure. He didn’t think there was anything in the world he could do to make her feel better if it didn’t go well - not that he wouldn’t try. 

“Are you doing anything tonight?” Felix started walking away - he assumed Kaden would follow him. 

“Not particularly. I might just watch it but nothing special.”

Felix turned to him and Kaden could almost hear the words on his lips. _Come to Velaris with me,_ he might say, _join me and Eleana at the festivities at home._ Felix didn’t say that though - he didn't say anything at all.

They joined back with the rest of the Elite who were doing cycles of different areas. One was archery, one was an exercise meant to build core strength, one was about stamina, another was hand to hand combat and the last was weapons training. They varied from day to day, but not a week went by where they didn't train these areas. 

Felix ordered them all back into their lines. Every day after training he would have them come together so that he could reorder the ranks if he felt the need to. He hadn’t changed them since Jonas was demoted to the back row, and before that it had remained the same since Kaden had joined. 

Felix looked them all over, one by one. Occasionally his eyes would squint and he would click his tongue but besides that he remained still with his arms crossed over his chest. 

“Alistair,” Alistair, the son of Lord Devlon and an original member of the Elite, stepped forward from his space in the front row. He had no true distinguishing features other than his height (or lack thereof), and shared the same tan skin and black hair that the majority of Illyrian’s had. 

“Sir,”

Kaden looked up and down the lines again. Kaden thought it was likely that Alistair would be swapped with one of the other Illyrians in the front row. It wouldn’t be the first time. Felix often shuffled them around so that they had a chance to lead new people and for the other Illyrians to know one another better. 

“Kaden,” 

Any thoughts he had halted at Felix calling his name. He may have been surprised, but his training was to good for him to falter. He stepped to the front at Felix’s call and waited. 

He risked a glance over towards Alistair. The male looked slightly troubled and confused at hearing Kaden’s name called. If Kaden looked behind him he was sure he would see the others probably had the same expression. 

“Swap.” Kaden didn't hesitate to move but Alistair did.

“What?” He demanded of Felix. 

“You’ll have a chance to regain your position, but for now this will be the order of things.” Felix said clinically.

“This is bullshit. I’ve been you’re best for years, what could’ve possibly changed?” He spat.

Felix gave him a cool look. “Someone got better. Now move.”

Alistair did no such thing and sent a burning sneer to the approaching Kaden. “You can’t just do this.” He was looking at Kaden but he was talking to Felix.

“I can and I will.” Felix was nothing but a general dealing with a petulant child. He showed no emotion so that he could hide the fact that what Alistair was doing was annoying, but Kaden knew him well enough that the disobedience would make him livid. 

“A duel then. I challenge him to a fight and whoever wins gets my place. You can’t argue that it isn’t fair.” He shouted at Felix. 

Kaden was  standing in front of everyone but to the side. He could see the Elite considering Alistair’s words, but none of them would ever breath a word while Felix was thinking. 

“First to yield loses. Magic is allowed, no weapons.” Felix conceded.

The Elite bristled at his choice but Alistair had a triumphant look on his face. 

The Elite formed a circle around the two males - wide enough so they wouldn't be caught in their crossfire. Kaden and Alistair - the former of which was still in shock - stood back to back then walked five paces form the other. They both discarded any weapons they had and flung them into the crowd. On Felix’s command, they would turn and fight. 

The Elite may have been quiet before but they were allowed to be as loud and rambunctious as they wanted to now. Many were screaming out words of encouragement or even placing bets. Kaden was pleasantly surprised to hear some Illyrians calling out his name. 

Felix stood an equal distance between the two but off to the side. He raised his hand and the noise from the Elite lowered to a low grumble. 

“Fight,” Felix shot up into the air and Kaden and Alistair turned and launched at each other. 

Kaden smashed a fist against Alistair’s face but received one in return to his arm. Alistair shot out his leg but Kaden deflected it and kicked Alistair in the knee. Kaden circled around him and Alistair pivoted to follow his movement. 

“I have three hundred years on you, boy. It’s probably best for you to give up,” Alistair sneered.

A laugh escaped Kaden at his words - the two men still circling each other. “Only a coward would say that. Scared the only way you’ll win will be if I surrender?” 

Alistair striked forward with a blow to Kaden’s stomach. Kaden barely felt it, and sent an uppercut into Alistair’s jaw. There was no grace to their fighting, just animalistic instinct.  

The whole crowd could have heard the way Alistair’s teeth clanged together. The older male spat blood at Kaden from where he had bitten his tongue.

“If you think you can beat me…” He shook his head. “You are nothing but a bastard born runt who’s greatest achievement will be being the Heir’s bitch.” He gibed. 

Kaden felt his blood curdle at the mention of Eleana. 

They both shot forward and ended up punching and kicking at each other from the ground. Alistair pushed him away so that he could rise and tried to kick Kaden in the head as he did so. He missed though - Kaden was too quick for a stunt like that to work. 

“At least I’ll have an achievement. You're the youngest son of the Lord. You’ll never be anything but a second tier solider.” Kaden barked. 

“You are so naive, child. She’s really not that hard to stick your cock into. Trust me, I speak from personal experience.” 

Kaden lost it. He flung himself at Alistair. It wasn't long before the older Illyrian was close to being unconscious on the ground with blood pouring out his nose and mouth. Kaden didn’t stop beating him though, and only did so that he could wrap his hands around Alistair’s neck. He gasped for air, his face becoming a satisfying purple and the veins jutting out. 

“Insult my friend again, and you’ll lose far more than consciousness.”

Kaden won.

____

 

Nuala had finished helping Eleana dress and was now working on curling her hair. She had already finished her makeup, which was light choal around her eyes and a gloss on her lips. It was just after dusk, and it would only be an hour before Starfall truely began. 

Nuala had chosen a dress that would exemplify Eleana’s new wings. 

It was a deep red satin that plunged at the front and was backless. There was also a slit up her left leg to her thigh. Eleana thought it was rather scandalous when she first saw Cerridwen bring it out for Nuala, but Eleana fell in love with it. It was stunning, simple yet eye catching, and best of all she had complete freedom to move her wings. At first Eleana was hesitant to wear something so - sexy, that’s the best word for it, in a room with her father and uncles but the jewellery Nuala had chosen made it more modest, or at least brought attention away from her breasts.

All her jewellery was gold. There was a thin chain that wrapped around her neck tightly and then went down to sit between her breasts. Where it finished was a link so that the necklace then split into two and wrapped around her back so that it encased her body like a halter and could be seen beneath her wings. She had rings in a similar fashion. She had two on every finger and they were all engraved with patterns of roses. One was at the base of her finger and the other in the middle of her knuckles and her nails. The two sets were attached by the same kind of chain that Eleana wore on her neck. The rings all met to a link by another chain in the centre of the back of her hand, that was chained to her thick bracelets. She also had cuffs shaped like vines that wrapped around her upper arms on each side. Eleana had never been so grateful for Nuala in her life. If she had spotted the jewellery before it had been on her she would have thought they were weird torture devices. Getting them _on_ could’ve been torture if Nuala hadn’t been there to do it for her. 

The last step in Nuala making her perfect - the only step Eleana blanched at - was Nuala spreading a glittering cream over any exposed skin Eleana had. It made her shimmer with every turn she took and it looked bewilderingly wonderful. Eleana may have found it strange to start with, but now she was considering stealing it away so she could use it whenever she pleased. 

“Thank you, Nuala. You truly are an artist.”

“No thanks needed. I’m just glad you’re better.” Nuala was just finishing off her hair when she spoke.

Eleana had always loved Nuala and her sister Cerridwen. When she was a tiny babe, unable to make sounds other than crying and squeaking, Felix liked to play a game where he would hide her. Her family would always find her in the strangest of places, but there were the rare occasions when the seven year old Felix would do too good of a job and they wouldn’t be able to. Felix was even more stubborn then than he is now, so he would just laugh and refuse to tell them where she was. In times like these, the two half wraiths would walk out with her in their arms. They were, of course, the only ones who were able to check in the walls. 

They had always taken fine care of her, even since her birth, and Eleana would never not be grateful. 

Eleana stood up. Her hair now fell to just below her collar bones in waves and finished the look Nuala was hoping for.  

“Are you ready to go yet, Laya?” Feyre burst into her room and stopped at the sight of her daughter. “Eleana… you look so beautiful.” Feyre covered her excited smile with her hands and approached her daughter.

Standing next to each other, you could see how they were mother and daughter even though their skin, eyes, and hair colour were different. 

Her mother was wearing something completely different to her. She was covered neck to toe in a beaded black gown with silver running through it in random veins. Her hair was tied in a bun low on her head so that it didn't impede on her crown. 

“So do you,” Eleana smiled. 

“You look so grown up. Don’t let your father see you,” She teased. “He still thinks you're a child. Males, honestly.” Feyre rolled her eyes and pulled Eleana away from the mirror she was looking in. Together they walked out of the house so that they could fly to the party at the House of Wind. 

Eleana agreed with every one that had told her that her wings looked identical, save for the scars, as the ones she had been born with. With every flap of her wings as she flew with her father that morning, she felt more breathless and weightless then she had in months. But in a good way, not in the stifling way caused by her nightmares, but a way that made her feel as though no matter she faced she would be able to handle it. 

Feyre grinned at her, and with her own created wings, shot off to attend the festivities. Eleana quickly followed, revelling in the wind blowing though her hair and over her golden skin. 

She flew right into the main room. Guests were already spread around chatting and laughing. The males were wearing fine suits and the females their best dresses. At her arrival, they all stopped to look at her.

Unlike in the camp, in Velaris there was no secrets or rumours surrounding what had happened to her. Eleana knew every fae in this room by name and they all brightened when they saw her with fully functioning wings again. Collectively, they raised their glasses and toasted to her health - then continued on with their conversations. 

“That was much less fanfare than I was expecting. I am bitterly disappointed.” Felix said from behind her. 

She turned to give him an indignant look but he just winked at her. 

Felix may as well have gone shirtless for how many buttons he had undone. Eleana suspected he just wanted to show off his chest and tattoos to any potential person that could warm his bed. How he hadn't been yelled at by Nesta was a true mystery. 

“Is everyone here?” Eleana quizzed. 

“Yes, you are the last. Elain and Lucien only arrived just before you though.” Felix answered. 

Eleana felt happy that she would see Elain and Lucien - out of everybody she saw them least but loved them no less. “Great.”

As they were talking, everyone gathered around the windows and opening in the walls to watch the beginning of the spirits racing across the sky. After the war, they had come back in full throng so the whole sky lit up as they zoomed across it. 

Her father came to stand beside her. He wrapped an arm around her shoulder only to pull back when it left gold shimmer on his white sleeve. 

“You better not tell me to go home,” Eleana quipped. 

“Why would I do that? Why would I care that fully grown males are staring at my daughter instead of Starfall? Me? Tell you to go home and change? Never.” Rhys ruffled her curls.

“Hmm.”

“However if you felt the need to wear my coat-”

Eleana elbowed him in the side and then ran off laughing. She spied Felix walking to the roof and promptly followed him. 

“Running away so early? And here I was thinking you were the one good in social situations.” She called after him. 

She jogged up the stairs and saw him leaning on the railing watching the spirits dance across the sky. Eleana could hear faint music from below them and swayed to the beat.

“I just needed some air. I was actually hoping to be alone.” 

Eleana caught the hint, and ignored it. 

“Why?”

He looked away from the sky and finally towards her. His eyes were rimmed in pink - not the look of someone who has cried but someone who is about to.

“Felix, what’s wrong?”

His hands were clenched around the railing. “It’s nothing important.”

“Anything that makes you upset is important, Felix. Please tell me,” She asked him in a low voice.

“I’ve just had a big day. Alistair has cracked the shits with me - Kaden knows about you and him by the way - and my father just gave me some bad news. It’s not really how I planned to spend my Starfall.” He croaked.

Eleana held onto his forearm in a gesture of comfort. 

“So people know about Alistair and I, it was never a secret on my part. What did Cassian tell you?” Eleana was surprised her and Alistair were even a topic of conversation. He was her first, and it only happened the one time. Eleana hoped Kaden wasn’t bothered by it - although he had no right to be, mate or not. 

“Quathryn was meant to come home with me for a few days, but because Azriel has failed to find - failed to complete a job, they want her home with them. I was really looking forward to spending time with her. I’d made all these games and her favourite cakes. I guess I’ll just have to bring them to her here. I also feel guilty because Kaden is back at camp spending Starfall alone even though as a fae from the Night Court he has as much right to enjoy it as the rest of us.” Felix sighed heavily. “I know I don’t seem it, but I am so, _so_ happy that you have your wings back. It’s been the best part of my day - best Starfall of my life.” 

“Thank you, Felix.”

He turned and pulled her into a tight hug. “I consider you a sister, you know. I would do anything to protect you.” He murmured against her hair. 

“I know, Felix.”

“You’re so little, just like Quathryn.” 

“I’m really not,” She snorted.

“Yes you are. Little Eleana.”

She pushed away from him and smacked him lovingly across the head. “I can't help you much with Cassian, Nesta and Quathryn. But I can take some of your guilt away.” 

“How do you propose you do that?” 

“Cover for me until I get back, and I’ll tell you in the morning.”

_____

 

Kaden wondered if the stars he was looking at now were the same ones his parents gazed at all those years ago before making the biggest mistake of their lives. 

It was deathly silent where he was - not a single soul was around except for him. He sat in front of his tent, awestruck - as he was every year - by Starfall. As a child, he would sneak off to go see it, hoping that maybe he would see his mother doing the same thing. Kaden had always felt disappointed when he never saw her, but that feeling left by the time he turned eleven. But that was still eleven years of yearning. As merciless as his family was though, Kaden knew his father let him leave and come back every Starfall, and he was filled with gratitude at the small but significant action. 

Kaden hated to admit that the yearning feeling had returned, not because he thought he would see his mother, but because he wished he could’ve spent Starfall with Eleana and Felix. 

“Aren’t you are sight for sore eyes,”

Kaden’s head turned so fast towards the voice that his neck cracked. 

Eleana was standing there - like the Cauldron had answered his prayers - and she was…

She was iridescent. 

“Eleana?”

She was wearing a red dress that slipped down her body like a waterfall. He could easily see the curve of her breasts, only highlighted by the golden jewellery adorning her body. And the best thing, _the best thing,_ was the powerful wings extended on her back. 

“I was hoping I would find you here.” She smiled at him, her white teeth gleaming.

“How did you know where I was?” He stood up and walked to her slowly. He couldn’t help but rack his gaze up and down her body. It looked as though she was covered in Star Dust, and he wanted to run his hands all over her. 

“I didn’t. I just closed my eyes, thought of you, and my body led me here.” She closed the distance between them and gave him a sweet kiss on his cheek. She smelt like champagne and roses.

“Why?” Kaden was struggling to form words. 

“I can't take full credit. Felix felt dreadful being in Velaris while you were here alone. I thought I would come spend some time with you to make up for it.” She stepped away from him but entwined their fingers. “This is an appalling place to watch Starfall. Fly to the Pinnacle with me?” 

The Pinnacle was the name of a ledge that stuck out from one of the largest mountains near the camp. 

“Yes,”

She let go of his hand and took flight. He quickly followed her, watching as her dress billowed in the wind and her hair wafted around her head. 

She landed swiftly at the Pinnacle, as though two months of inactivity barely phased her abilities, and patiently waited for him to catch up. Kaden had no problem admitting Eleana was a far superior flyer than him.

“Come lay with me,” She said and she waved away leaves and lied on the rock. She had one hand behind her head, using it as a pillow, and the other resting on her stomach. Her fingers were just slipped inside the low V off her neckline and Kaden had to hold back from putting his in the same place. 

He went down next to her, but rested on his elbow so that he was on his side and could look down on her. Her waved hair had formed a crown around her head, and there was a small smile on her lips. Her legs were bent slightly, making the slit on her dress expose her long legs to him. 

“Eleana,”

“I’m sorry I didn’t think of you today. It never crossed my mind that you would be here alone, and I apologise.” She said without pretence. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for. You got your wings back today, it’s no shock that it would take up your mind. And Eleana, I would never, _never,_ expect of either you or Felix to think of me in a situation like this.” 

She joined him on her side so that they were positioned in the same way. “No matter what you say,” She told him, “I don’t think I could ever stop thinking about you.” She brushed her thumb across his cheek. “I also missed you.”

Kaden needed to stop thinking about her body, and if it was possible for her to wear underthings with a dress like that, and start functioning like a normal male. 

“What did you do today?” He asked her. He could do small talk. Small talk was good. Small talk distracted him from her peaked nipples that he could see though the thin satin of her dress. 

“After my mother fixed my wings, I flew for hours and hours with my father. It was just like when I was a child. Then I had lunch at the rainbow and my mother, Mor, and Nesta joined us as well. Father was going to stay but he said he was a bit overwhelmed with all us women so left to go do manly things with Cassian. He’s a real idiot sometimes,” Eleana looked even more lustrous when she talked about her family. Kaden reflected on what it must be like to have a family you loved so much, and cared equally for you. “And you?”

“I got promoted today,”

Her face lit up and she flung herself at him in excitement. “Congratulations!” She had one arm around his neck and was pulling him close. In turn, he put a hand on the dip of her waist and squeezed lightly. 

“It was quite a surprise, especially when I had to fight for the spot.” He laughed. 

“Why did you have to fight for it?” She pulled back to look him in the eyes, but her hand was still resting on the nape of his neck and they were only a breath apart.

“A man named Alistair challenged Felix’s decision. It was fair, and I won.” He explained.

“Oh, yes, Felix told me you’d discovered my history with him.” She looked away. 

“What you do with your body and who you do it with is your choice, and I would never begrudge you that or judge you for it.” Using the hand he had on her waist, he placed a hand on her cheek and turned her back to him.

“I was very young, only fifteen. I was so desperate for it I probably would’ve fucked a drywall. He was a good compromise.” She snorted. “Have you ever…?” She continued. 

“Fucked a drywall?”

She tugged lightly on his hair. “You know that’s not what I meant,” She laughed. “Have you ever been with someone?”

Kaden did not want to think about sex while his body was so close to hers, but he’d do anything if she asked. “I have. I’ve never had a relationship, or even anything all that meaningful, but I’ve been with quite a few women.” He divulged. 

She buzzed and thrummed her fingers on the back of his head. “I’ve been told it’s better when you're with someone you care about,” She assented. 

“I imagine it would be.”

His hand went back to her waist, caressing down her body as it did. Her hand moved away from the back of his head, the tips of her fingers brushing over his lips. 

He couldn’t  take it anymore, and he crashed his lips onto hers. She put her hand on his chest, and he was scared that she would push him away, but rather she fisted his shirt and yanked him so that he was on top of her. 

Their kiss was hot and open-mouthed. Her legs were wrapped around him and she was pulling him closer with every fibre in her body. Her arms raked up and down his back, gloriously under his shirt, and bumped him away only long enough for him to sit back and take it off. When he kissed her again, it was on her jaw, then her neck, and he went lower and lower until he was at base of her breasts. 

“ _Kaden_ ,” She moaned as he sucked the skin just below them. 

He ran his hand down her until he was gripping her thigh through the slit in her dress. He ran his hand up, under the fabric.

“Are you wearing any-”

“No,” She breathed. “I was, but I took them off before I came.” 

Kaden groaned and came up to kiss her mouth again. This time it was deeper, their tongues brushing unhurriedly and her hands roaming spectacularly over him. 

She broke off and he licked at her neck, settling on sucking the space between her neck and shoulder. Her generous breast had become exposed, and he palmed and massaged it - making her moan. 

She lifted her hips and ground against him, and Kaden felt himself become hard at her actions. She did it again, but this time she also ran a hand along the base of his wings. He twitched in his pants and grazed his teeth over the love mark he’d left on her neck. 

“ _Kaden_ ,”

“I love when you say my name like that,” 

“No, Kaden. Stop.”

He sat back instantly at her demand. 

“I’m so sorry,” He said quickly.

“No, _no._ Not that.” She leaned up and brushed her lips against his again. She stayed sitting up, resting on her elbows, and glanced around them. “Can you hear that?”

Kaden was sure he was far too distracted by the gold glitter now coating his upper body to be able to hear anything other than the blood rushing in his ears, but he tried anyway. 

In the distance he could hear a strange rustling and clicking. Whatever was making the noise was coming closer to them.

“ _Shit_ , It’s coming over.” Kaden scrambled up and pulled her up by her hands with him. He helped her fix her dress back into place and then put his shirt back on. He’d broken some of the chains adorning her body, but she insisted she didn’t care. 

The clicking and scraping became so loud that they should’ve been able to see it, but there was nothing there.

“Use your magic,” Eleana whispered. 

Kaden opened his mind and skidded away from the sight in front of him, pulling Eleana with him. He shoved her behind him, fully aware that she couldn’t see the Colloden standing in front of them. 

“Kaden? What do you see?” Her voice shook with fear. 

It was the same as he last saw it, except now there was a jagged red line where Kaden had cut off its head. 

“Kaden?” She tried to move in front of him but he blocked her. 

“It’s a Colloden.” He finally answered. 

“Seriously?” 

Kaden looked at her incredulously. Eleana no longer sounded scared or afraid. She sounded almost… relieved? 

“Fly away. I’ll hold it off while you get Az.” Kaden was whispering but it was clear the Colloden was listening to every word and was just amusing them by not approaching them. 

“I’m not going to leave you here,” She stepped to his side and took his hand. “I know how to kill it now, Amren told me. But I need you to be my eyes.” 

She didn’t give him time for a rebuttal, or even a warning, before she surrounded them and the area around them in a tornado of wind and fire. 

The fire tore around them and high into the sky, likely drawing the attention of any Illyrian enjoying Starfall. Eleana had judged correctly and the Colloden was in her circle of flame and it drew closer to her.

“Narrow the flame by six feet,” He shouted over the roaring fire. “I’ll try and cut it so we can burn the pieces.”

She looked like she would object at him tackling it on his own, but she nodded after a second and focused on her flames.

He only had a dagger in his boot, but hopefully it would be good enough against the club and claws of the Colloden. 

He attacked. He already had adrenaline pumping through him from being with Eleana, and this time he wouldn't let it hurt her.

The way they fought was similar to the way he and Felix had fought only that morning. Kaden and the Colloden were facing off against each other and the Colloden swiped at Kaden with its talons. Kaden was swift and managed to cut off one of them and fling it to the side. The Colloden cried out in pain and snarled at Kaden. It tried to move around him, but Kaden was just more victorious in slicing off more of its body. 

Every time it tried to move closer to Eleana, he would cut it. 

It swung its club at him and he blocked the blow and grabbed what would’ve been its wrist. With his dagger, he quickly sawed at the wrist and made quick work of hacking off the club from its arm. 

_____

 

Eleana watched in horror as Kaden fought something she couldn’t see. She could picture the Colloden in her mind, but it was nothing she could imagine as she heard invisible screams and saw Kaden panting with effort against an invisible foe.

She had to do something, he only had a dagger for fuck’s sake. 

An idea sprang to her head. 

Above them but still encased in the flame, she made it snow. It combined with the fire and rained down as black rather than white but she didn't see how that would make a different to whether her plan worked or not. 

It fell down, Kaden too focused to acknowledge it, and randomly scattered across the ground Eleana could see where random lumps would appear and the snow would never touch the ground.

These must have been the parts that Kaden was hacking away.

She made fast work of picking them up and turning them to ash, and then misting what was left over. She did this over and over and over and over and tried to ignore Kaden’s grunts as he fought the Colloden. Eventually there was nothing else to be found, but Kaden was still fighting. Her dress and hair was whipping around her from the superstorm of fire and sweat was running down her back. As much as she hated to do it so soon, she dismissed her wings. 

She could just see the Colloden’s outline from where the black snow had stuck to its form, and that was good enough for her to help Kaden take it down. 

She tightened the fire around them and made the ash rain heavier. Her dress was in the way and was no good for fighting, so as much as she would have to apologize to Nuala for it, she tore away the bottom of the dress so it reached just above her knees instead. 

She summoned the talons that she inherited from her father but barely used and threw herself at the clumped snow. Kaden’s eyes went wide from fear as he saw her attack it, but he shook himself from the distraction and went back to stabbing the beast. 

They both tore at it, and soon it was lying on the ground between them. They were both out of breath from exerting so much energy, and Eleana finally lowered her fire and stopped the snow. 

The area around them was a charred mess, and their skin was stained black from the snow. 

“I just have to mist it,” Eleana exhaled. 

She moved over and fell to her knees in front of what she knew was the Colloden - her and Kaden weren’t the only things to be stained black.

She went over it thoroughly, Kaden kneeling next to her and telling her if she missed anything. She leaned into him when she was done - eyes drooping from exhaustion. 

“That was some magic you had there,” He pulled her close to him and offered her the warmth from his body now that the fire was gone. 

“I’m more impressed with you than I am myself. Have you ever seen someone fight an opponent to the death but not actually _see_ the other person? It’s quite something.”

She turned her head so she could kiss the underside of his jaw. 

“You seemed relieved when I told you it was the Colloden,” Kaden observed.

“I was,” Eleana revealed.

If the Colloden was alive it meant that she was right. More importantly, Amren was right when she said the only way to kill it was to cut it into pieces, burn them and mist them. It was just another clue to why the attacks had started - another thing Felix could work with to help them find an answer to this literal riddle. 

“I’m surprised,” Kaden said. 

“Really?”

“Of course. Who told you that it was still alive and that we couldn’t find it? I don’t know if it was dumb-luck that it came across us tonight or if it found us.”

Eleana flinched away from his words. “What do you mean ‘who told me it was still alive?’” 

“Did you not know?” He reached for her as she stood up and stepped away from him. “Why else would you be relieved that we found it just now?”

 _Alive_. The Colloden had been alive the whole time Kaden had been assuring her that she was safe. 

She breathing became unsteady and she took another faltering step away from him. “Who else knew?” She demanded. 

“Everyone knew, Eleana. I had orders from Azriel, who had them from the High Lord-”

“Did Felix know?” She whimpered. She already knew the answer, Kaden’s expression said it all.

“Yes, but-”

“You all knew and you didn’t tell me? It’s been _months_ , and you didn’t tell me?!” Eleana felt betrayal course through her body. She stumbled away from the male she had been ready to confess her feelings to, and turned her back to him. 

“Please, let me explain,” He reached out to hold her hand but she avoided him.

“Do. Not. Touch. Me.” She growled. 

“Please,”

It didn't matter what he said. It didn't change the fact that he had _lied_ to her. That while he was out with Azriel ‘training’, he was really searching for the creature her family told her she was safe from. A moment ago, she had been blindingly happy. Now she was despairing. 

“I have to go.” She cried.

Eleana left him standing alone. 

 

 

 

 

 


	11. Chapter 11

Eleana wasn't sure where to go. In her mind, she had three options. The first was storming back to the House of Wind and demanding that her family explain why they lied to her, and why they didn't trust her enough to tell her that the Colloden was still alive. The second option is just going home and crawling into bed - waiting until the morning to deal with all the emotions that were coursing through her. Eleana, as mad as she was, didn't want to say something that she’d regret. However, she also wouldn’t be opposed to the look on her parent’s faces when she turned up covered in ash and blood with her dress torn. She could picture it now.

She would winnow close enough to fly in, and when she did everything would become quiet. Everyone would stop talking, even the musicians would stop playing, and her father and mother would rush over to her. Azriel and Cassian would draw their swords, and Felix would become an enigma of death.  

She would use her shield of solid wind to block them out so they couldn’t come close to her, and her father would be in tears begging her to let him in. Her mother would try and tear down her shield, and guests would flee at the sight of the heir - thinking some horrible danger would be lurking around the corner. 

She would speak calmly - her tones would be hushed as she asked them for the truth. Her quietness would be harder for them though then if she had yelled, and Eleana would rejoice in causing them the same kind of pain that she felt because of them. 

But Eleana still had her third option, and it was the safest and most practical of the three. 

 

_____

 

Felix was still contently standing on the roof. Quathryn was exhausted and was getting antsy with all the noise downstairs so he’d taken her up here with him. He had tried to convince his parent’s to let him take her with him when he left, but they had refused. Her safety was at the upmost importance, and if something happened Nesta was too pregnant and Cassian too busy to help straight away. 

Felix thought they should have more faith in him - had he not proved himself? 

She was asleep in his arms with her head on his shoulder and arms at her side from where they had fallen away from his neck. He was gently swaying side to side, happily watching Starfall on his own. Other fae came in and out but Felix had claimed the roof. Right now he was alone with this sleeping sister. 

He heard someone come up on the roof, but he didn’t bother to turn and see who it was. It was just another merry party goer wanting to enjoy a different view of Starfall.

“Felix!” A voice hissed.

Confused, Felix turned around to see Kaden crouching on the roof. The male was covered in dirt and ash and reeked of blood - which he was also covered in. he also had light smears of gold sporadically on him.

“Kaden? What are you doing here?” Felix looked side to side and walked over the kick the entrance to the roof’s door shut. “Why the hell do you look like that?” 

Kaden was breathless. His eyes kept darting around as if some force of nature would smite him down.

“I need your help - I didn’t know who else to come to. I fucked up, Felix, really badly and I don’t know how to possibly fix it.” 

“Stay here. Don’t move. I’ll be back in a few minutes. This isn't something I want Quathryn waking up to.” Felix left him friend and hastily took his sister inside. He found Azriel and Mor and handed her over to them and ran back to the roof. He ignored their curious calling of his name and made a note to think of some excuse to tell them. He sealed the door again and turned back to Kaden.

Kaden was now kneeling on the ground with his face in his hands. HIs anguish was clear - although its source was not. 

“What happened?” Felix demanded. 

“I was with Eleana,” that explained the gold on his body, “and we were attacked by the Colloden.”

Ice froze Felix. He walked to Kaden and pulled him up by the collar of his shirt so he could look him in he face. “Where is she now? Is she hurt?”

“No, no. Yes. But not because of that. _Shit_ , Felix.” He stammered. “We fought it. We killed it the way Amren said to.”

“Then what’s the problem?” Felix snarled.

“She found out that we all knew and winnowed off. I scoured the whole of camp and I couldn’t find her anywhere. I thought maybe she might’ve come back here but she hasn’t - I would know if she had. I can’t find her anywhere, and she’s in so much pain. I did something bad. Something that made it worse.” Kaden confessed. 

“Fuck. _Fuck!_ Shit Kaden.” Felix needn’t imagine how his cousin must be feeling.  “What made it worse, what did you do?” Felix needed to know so that when he found her he would know what to do. Laya was a complicated creature who’s lack of sleep only intensified her neurotic nature. Felix new all of her moods as well as he knew himself. 

Kaden’s face turned a deep shade of red. “I’m sorry for coming to Velaris, but I had to find you.”

“What did you do?”

“I know people aren’t allowed to come in without the permission of the High Lord-”

“ _What did you do?”_ Felix yelled. He shook Kaden and made him look him in the eyes.

Whatever Kaden had done, Felix was sure that it would effect Laya in a way that he hadn’t seen before. He knew his cousin, knew how strong her feelings were becoming, and if something happened that involved her mate he was sure it would have dire consequences if he didn’t find her soon. 

Felix shook him again.

Despite Felix’s efforts Kaden still wouldn’t look at him. Felix studied the fae. The gold from Eleana was smeared across him face and down his neck and under his shirt. His hands were a mix of the gold and ash that swirled up his wrists.

Felix could guess exactly what they had done. 

“Did you have sex with her?” He asked. 

Kaden chocked and sputtered at the question and shook his head. “ _No_. Cauldron, no. We were interrupted before we could do anything much. But Felix, she was so upset when she found out. We have to find her.”

Felix pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “ _We_ will do nothing. You will return home and _I_ will find my cousin. Her wrath isn't something I’m fond of, and if what you say is accurate then you being there might provoke her.” Felix knew that the pain Eleana is feeling would only be strengthened from the sight of her mate. He was twinged with sadness and guilt knowing how she must be feeling having discovered their lies. 

“Let me help-”

“You’ve done enough.” The finality to Felix’s voice made Kaden flinch. 

Sympathy wasted over Felix, and he lovingly patted Kaden’s back and said in a much more gentle tone, “Everything will be fine - you have nothing to worry about, my friend. No one’s going to leave you because of this. Not even her.”

_____

 

 

No one stopped Eleana as she crossed the lawn. Faeries certainly stopped to watch her, but no one dared approach her while she was in such a state. 

Despite everything, her body basked in the sudden warmth of the Spring Court. It was a welcome change from the Night Court, where Spring was yet to find the mountains. She didn’t hesitate to open the back doors of the balcony of the Spring Court or enter the mansion. 

She was welcomed by art covered walls, including pieces from her mother, and lush carpet and furniture. 

As well as a very confused High Lord.

“Eleana?” 

“Sorry to come without warning. I was hoping I may stay here for the night - I have something to discuss with you.”

Glaslane dismissed the maid he was conversing with and strode over to Eleana. He blanched at the look of her and concern immediately shone on is face. 

“Is everything alright? Did something go wrong at Starfall? Elain and Lucien-”

“Are fine and have no idea I’m here.” She finished for him. Eleana was touched at his concern, but it wasn’t what she needed right now. “I need to speak to you as a High Lord rather than as a friend. But first, if you don’t mind, I would really like a bath.” Her voice was much lighter than the way she felt. It would be rather impolite to show up unannounced at the Spring Court only to snap at the High Lord. 

Glaslane smiled understandingly and led her to a suite with bathing chambers. The room wasn’t at all dusty, but it was clear that it hadn’t been used in a while. There was a large bed in the centre with a wardrobe to the left and a reading nook to the right. Next to the wardrobe was a door that led to the bathrooms.

“Take as long as you need, but I have to ask if you’re safe. Do you need me to contact someone? Send a healer? The way you look, Eleana…”

“Thank you - truely. I know that I barged in here without invitation, and I hate to be a nuisance.” It’s also just that any other High Lord would go running to her parent’s at the sight of her, and she couldn’t bear to see them right now. Eleana knew that she may be acting like an unreasonable, angsty teenager at the moment, but she thought she deserved that emotion. 

“Never,” Glaslane assured her. 

“But I can’t go home right now. I will explain everything, I promise.” 

Glaslane nodded grimly and left the room. Eleana presumed that he wouldn’t call a healer and hopefully got the message that her parents weren't appropriate to contact either. 

Eleana ran the bath. When the water was steaming, she peeled off her tattered dress and stepped into the welcoming water. She reached to the vanity beside her and grabbed some soap. She brutally scrubbed at her skin, trying not only to get the dirt, blood, and gold off of her body, but also the lingering scent of Kaden.

Kaden.

Eleana sighed loudly and dipped her head under the water to wash out her hair. She’ll admit, when she’d first seen it after the Colloden cut it off she was upset. She has since realised how much easier shorter hair is to maintain, and has made her peace with it. 

But Kaden.

She came up from under the water and just relaxed back. With her magic, she made water figures the size of her and her mate and made them dance. She wished the night had gone differently. She wished she had never found out what they knew. If she hadn’t, this may have been the most perfect night of her life.

Kaden.

She could feel it in her bones - the way she felt about him. The feelings that came to her body every time he smiled, or laughed, or she just saw him and knew how kind and selfless he would be. Her heart ached at how he cared for her, even though he had only ever seen her at her worst. What would it be like when she could show him the other side to her?

Kaden. Her mate. The male she was in love with.

 

_____

 

When Eleana had finished washing up and after she’d hunted down some more clothes to wear, she joined Glaslane in his study. It was not the first time she’d been there - she had been friends with the High Lord her entire life, he was practically one of her cousins - and always found it a curious place. It was newer than the rest of the mansion, you could smell the fresher wood every time you walked in, but it was far more dilapidated. The walls were slated and the floor creaked, but Glaslane never let anybody fix it. Why, Eleana didn’t know. With anyone else, she would’ve felt exposed in wearing the silk pyjamas that a servant had found her, but she was too good friends with him to feel any sort of ridiculousness. 

Glaslane was sitting at his desk, papers scattered around him and head in his hands. He looked up at the sound of her approach, and put on a genuine - yet strained - smile. 

“Now how can I help you? Not as a friend, but as a High Lord.” His eyes danced with mirth from the absurdity of the situation. 

“I wanted to know if there has been any peculiar attacks or killings in the Spring Court of late. Anything that seems strange or unexplainable.” 

Glaslane raised an eyebrow at her query. “Not what I was expecting, but I’ll bite. Yes. There has been.” He spread his hands out and over the sheets of paper littering his desk. “They all follow a pattern, but I can’t figure out what’s doing it." 

Eleana walked over and sat across from him. “How have they been dying?”

“Drained of blood and then internal organs eaten. It seems the deaths have been painless but long.” He explained. 

Not the Colloden then. Or an Impeath. Something else. “You say you don’t know what it is?”

“I have no idea. I tried to catch a suriel to see if it could tell me, but unsurprisingly I failed. I can’t protect my people from something if I don’t know what it is.”

It was a sentiment Eleana was sure many High Lords had thought recently. 

“I may have an idea that could find out what it is. If I’m right, then there’s something a lot bigger going on. If I’m wrong, then I’ll look like an idiot but at least I’ll be wrong.”

“I’ll do anything at this point.” He laughed humourlessly. 

Without a word, Eleana stood up and waved for Glaslane to follow her. She led him to his vast and beautiful library and shut the door behind him so they would have complete privacy. 

She knew her way around this library nearly as well as she knew the way around the library in Velaris. She had been here countless times with her mother to visit Elain and Lucien, who even though ruled the Autumn Court wanted to raise Glaslane in the place that he would rule when he came of age. 

Eleana wandered over to the section that held the children’s books, and scanned until she saw the all-too-familiar faerie book that she had discovered the Colloden and Impeath in. She reached down and picked it up, only for Glaslane to snatch it away.

“Glaslane?”

“What do you want with this book?” He clutched it to his chest and stepped away from her.  

“I just wanted to show you something inside of it.” She said cautiously.

“Oh.” His expression fell and he sheepishly handed the book back. “I’m sorry, it’s just that you came here with a destroyed dress and are very obviously emotional right now and I have quite a bit of sentimental attachment to that book. I didn’t want to risk it getting damaged. Forgive me.” He bowed his head.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m similar when I think my books are going to be damaged. Here, let’s sit and I’ll show you what I was talking about.” Eleana gestured over to a table next to an open window. A light, warm breeze was flowing in from the night, and Eleana couldn’t help but feel sad she was missing Starfall. The emotion soon turned to anger though when she remembered _why_ she was missing Starfall, and her feelings blew away with the breeze. 

She explained in vivid detail to Glaslane the events that led up to her believing that the creatures from this book somehow tied into something much more sinister. She started with the discovery of the dead Illyrians and her encounter with the Impeath, she even told him about Kaden’s involvement, and the subsequent ailment of Felix and the Colloden’s attack. At any mention of Kaden, Glaslane’s face smoothed in a way that let Eleana know he was aware of who the High Fae-Illyrian was. Eleana presumed it was because Kaden had come to the Spring Court at some point to look for the Colloden, likely with Azriel.  

She didn't know whether she should hate that she knew him so well, or hate that she didn't realise before what was going on. But why would she have? Why wouldn’t she believe the lies he told her? 

Her story ended with what had happened in the Night Court only hours ago.

Glaslane stared at her wide-eyed and silent. 

“I don’t think you should share this with anyone else, Eleana.” He finally said. 

She started to protest but he cut her off. “I’m not saying I don’t believe you. I think that what you've presented is a very interesting argument. However, if you told the same thing to one of the older High Lords? You’d be ridiculed, no matter who you are or how much evidence you have.” 

He stood up and walked away from her. With his back to her, he spoke again. “Go rest. In the morning, we’ll go through every book I own to see if we can find something that matches what’s being inflicted on my court. Until then, we both need to sleep.”

He left the door open as he went to go to presumably his own quarters. 

Eleana didn’t know if she had the energy to go back, or even find, the room that she had bathed in. She would be content to sleep here, but she might scare someone if they found her. Her nightmares also had yet to stop, and she’d hate to have breakdown while not in a secure space.

 

_____

 

 

Daylight lit the library as Eleana and Glaslane scoured through chapters upon chapters in the book that might elude to what was harming the people of the Spring Court. Luckily,  Glaslane had multiple copies of the faerie book. He started from the front, and her from the back. 

While reading Eleana formed a plan in her head. 

She would not return to the Night Court until she had spoken to at least one other High Lord. She agreed with Glaslane - maybe she should simply question strange deaths in relation to her own personal findings rather than bring up children’s tales. 

Eventually, after hours of reading, Eleana stumbled upon a tale where the creature featured matched the description Glaslane had given her the day before. She showed it to him - nervous as well as eager to prove that what she was saying had credence. 

He read the tale at least seven times, then nodded at her. “Leave it with me.” 

He got up, and suddenly Eleana was alone again.

 

____

 

Eleana looked through the house hoping to borrow something that wasn't pyjamas so that she could move on to talk to another Court. There was no need to go to Dawn - she already knew they were having problems -  and decided there was really one place to go. As much as it pained her, and it really did, eventually she would have to go home and face her parents. Her mother she might be able to deal with, her father on the other hand... 

Just like how his disappointment and doubt hurt her most, so did his deceptions. 

If she went home after visiting only the Spring Court then her story would likely be met with doubt. Her parents respected Glaslane as the High Lord and the child Elain and Lucien raised, but he would always be the scrawny fae child in their eyes - someone they could not take seriously. 

So Eleana would raise her questions in another Court, one she knew her parents wouldn’t doubt. She left a note for Glaslane. She wrote her thanks for his hospitality and care, and that she would visit soon and not look like a complete wreck when she did. 

When she left she tried to give the faeries living in the mansion kind smiles. She hoped that the story of how she'd appeared disheveled and ruined wouldn’t be spread, but it was her own fault if it did. It was mid afternoon, and Eleana decided to fly to her next destination. She had missed her wings so very much - the night just passed she had wrapped herself in them as she slept. 

She was in no hurry to reach the Summer Court, she still had hours before her parents might start to wonder where she was. Felix said he would cover for her, but knowing his relationship with Kaden he likely already knew the events of last night. She didn’t care though, not as the wind whipped her hair around her face or made her wings and arms tingle. 

The flight wasn’t long enough - she touched down on the balcony of the main atrium less than an hour later. There was a maid dusting when she landed. The maid, a brunette with lovely dark skin, widened her eyes in shock and bustled away to fetch High Lord Tarquin and inform him of their impromptu guest.  

Eleana felt free to sit while she waited for him. She was glad that she had found an old dress to wear. It was light and flowed around her as she moved and was the the deepest emerald green. It was clearly made for a High Fae, and likely belonged to Glaslane’s mother. By good fortune, it was also backless - so Eleana could fly as she wished. 

Eleana tried to distract herself with her surroundings. The marble pillars that were a few shades darker than the floor. The walls that weren’t really walls at all, but just gaping glassless windows. The sun warming her skin. Anything so that she didn’t think about Kaden, or Felix, or her mother and father, or her uncles and aunts. Fuck.

_Everyone knew, Eleana…_

Eleana didn’t think about anything else Kaden said as Tarquin entered the room. He wore sea green and gold, the traditional colours of the Summer Court. Eleana knew that if Tarquin could verify anything she thought it would have invaluable meaning to her own Court. 

“Eleana!” He greeted her warmly with a hug and a kiss to the cheek. “How unexpected. Are your parents with you? It wouldn’t be the first time they were buzzing around without my knowing.” He linked their arms and drew her away.

“Unfortunately not. Actually, they don’t know I’m here and I would appreciate your secrecy. That’s if I may have it.” She said candidly.

“As you wish,” Although the youngest High Lord with the exception of Glaslane, Tarquin knew the games of the High Fae well, and knew it was best to keep secrets if someone asked you to. “What brings you to my Court?”

“I’m investigating a slew of killings across multiple Courts. My mother and father are protective and would disapprove of putting myself at risk.” She doubted he would detect her lie.

“That sounds like your parents.” He laughed. “What can I do to aid you in your search?”

“You can answer some simple questions about if there have been any mysterious deaths in the Summer Court recently. Anything that can’t be explained, or where you don’t know who the assailant is. There have been in other places in Prythian - three Courts that I know of.” 

Tarquin led them into another sitting room, except this one was much more private. There were still windows, but they were much smaller and sealed by glass. When he shut the grand doors behind her, all outside noise cut off and the only thing she could hear was Tarquin’s footsteps on the pleasantly cold floor. 

“I would be lying if I told you that in the past we hadn’t had problems that… met what you’re asking. However it has been over a year since we’ve had an unexplained attack.” 

“A year?”  

“Yes, and only three out of the fifty-eight people attacked were killed. It was a dark time, but my people have survived much worse.” 

“Did it all happen in Adriata?” 

“No, it was mostly in the small farming villages that lay outside the city. I can give you the work we complied on it if you would like, but I do not have time to linger on such things. I have my own people looking into the matter, and your time would be more valuably spent talking to them.”

Eleana nodded. “Thank you for your time, High Lord.” 

“It was a pleasure seeing you, Eleana. Why don’t you stay and have lunch with me and Cressida? I’m sure she’d be thrilled to see you.”

Eleana considered his offer. The longer she stayed here, the longer she didn’t have to go home. It also gave Tarquin time to give her his notes on the attacks. “I would love to.” She answered him. 

 

_____

 

 

Through all his efforts, everything that he could’ve possibly tried and everywhere he thought she could’ve possibly gone, Felix could not find his cousin. 

He vigorously searched Velaris, and then their camp as well. All her favourite spots throughout Prythian, including the family mansion in the Mortal territory. He even considered flying to Drakon’s island, but realistically he knew she wouldn’t have gone there. 

It terrified him - the fact that he couldn’t find her when he looked so hard. Maybe he should’ve let Kaden help instead of sending him away. It was too late for that though, he was already at his father’s office in the House of Wind and knocking at the door. 

“Enter.” Cassian called.

Felix braced himself and walked into his father’s office. His mother was there to, sitting on the desk smiling at his father. Cassian had one hand on her bulging stomach and the other was making idle notes. Quathryn was sitting at a table next to the desk - a small table only as high as Felix’s knees - and was drawing contently. 

They all looked up and beamed at the sight of him.

“Son!” His father stood up and pressed a quick kiss to his mother’s head before coming over to him. “Where did you wonder off to? We missed you last night. Actually, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know.” Cassian smirked while Nesta scoffed. 

“You disgust me,” she told him with nothing but love in her voice. She got up as well, much to the protest of Felix who would be happy if  his pregnant mother just rested until the baby came. She waved off his concern and picked up Quathryn. “We’re going out, call me if you need me.” She gave a quick kiss to Felix and Cassian and left. 

Felix waited until he could no longer hear Quathryn’s nonsense babble before he spoke to his father.

“What brings you here?” Cassian asked. He ruffled Felix’s hair, something he often did, and pulled his arm so they could both go sit down. 

“I need your help,”

His father pulled short and turned to fully face him. 

“What is it?” 

“It’s, uh, I need help.” Felix stammered. He was scared to tell his father that he’d lost Eleana, lest he be disappointed in him. 

“I know, you just told me.” Cassian said slowly. 

“I don’t think you should tell Rhys until we know if something is really wrong.” Felix was saying it only to drag out the inevitable bad news. 

“Felix, if it’s something that Rhys might need to get involved in then I need to know right now.”

“Eleana was attacked last night by the creature from two months ago.”

“What?!” Panic overcame Cassian and he shoved away from his son to start summoning the rest of the family. “Why didn’t we hear about this immediately? Where is she?”

“ _Stop_ ,” Felix blasted a shield around the room they were in so that his father couldn’t summon anyone.  

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Listen to me, I wasn’t finished. She killed it,” some of the panic left the room, “but she found out we all knew that it was alive. She’s run off and I’ve been looking for her all last and today.” 

“You should have told us the moment you knew she was gone.” His father growled. 

“I thought I could find her-”

“You thought wrong. What could you have possibly been thinking, Felix? You _knew_ how worried we all were about her, and yet you _don’t tell us_ when she gets attacked by the very thing we are all looking for? Azriel and I have been looking relentlessly for months. I’ve been too scared to let your sister out of my sight, too scared to leave Nesta alone at night. I need to get Azriel and Rhys, and we need to find her before something terrible happens.” 

Felix felt scorned by the words of his father. 

Cassian stormed out of the room so that Felix’s ward no longer inhibited his ability to contact Azriel and Rhys.

“What about me?” Felix called after his furious father.

Cassian stopped, but didn't look at his son. “What about you?”

“Were you ever worried about me? Scared for me?” Felix felt tears of frustration burning in his eyes. 

“You can take care of yourself. Your training-”

“I never should've asked you for help.” Felix shoved past his father. “You’re acting like an overdramatic asshole.”

“Don’t you use that language with me, Felix.”

“I wish I had just gone to Az for help - like I usually do.” 

“ _Felix_.” 

Felix tried to find the closest window or door to jump out of and fly away but was stopped by his father grabbing him by the back of his collar. 

“Look at me, son.”

Felix gritted his teeth and did as his father asked.

“What’s wrong? This is about more than just Eleana, isn’t it? What has you so upset?” Cassian now had his hand around the back of his neck comfortingly.

“I just - I tried to find her. I needed you to help me. My only job is to find her, and I can’t.”  A silent sob shuddered through his body.

“Oh Felix.” Cassian pulled him into a tight hug. “It will be fine. Rhys has had measures in place in case she went missing again. Her running away isn’t your fault.”

Felix hugged his father in return. It didn’t matter how old he was, he would always need his father to help him feel better again. 

“Am I interrupting something?” Both Felix’s and Cassian’s gaze shot to the small voice at the end of the hallway. 

Eleana was standing there draped in a green dress and hair messily framing her face. She was smiling, but anyone could see how forced it was.  

“Laya?” Felix broke away from his father and rushed over to her side. He attempted to hug her, but she pushed him away with a hand on his chest. “How many people know I was gone?” She questioned Felix.

“Just us. Laya, I’m so glad you’re back I was so worried.” The words rushed out of him. 

She ignored him completely and stepped around him to face his father. She focused her gaze on him, and Cassian’s face became flack and dazed. 

“What are you doing?”

“Making him forget I was gone.”

“Eleana…”

“You have no right to judge me.” She snapped. “Now come with me - he’ll never even realise that I was here.” She paused. “Or that you fought.” 

Felix followed Eleana as she strode away from Cassian, leaving the general with a blank face he hoped would soon return to normal.  

She led him out of the House of Wind, but rather than flying like they normally would have, she  found the small door that led to the thousands of steps imbedded in the mountain that people who couldn't fly had to use if they wanted to come to the House.  

She walked for at least ten minutes when she stopped to sit on the mountain face. She looked out over the view of Velaris, and closed her eyes. 

“I assume Kaden told you what happened yesterday.” She whispered.

“He did.” Felix joined her sitting down and observed Velaris as well. Soon the sun would be setting, and the true merriment would start. “I think he’s under the impression you’ll never speak to him again.”

“Of course I will.” She leaned her head in his shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me, Felix? I tell you everything. Kaden doesn’t even know he’s my mate, and it wasn’t even a full day before I told you.”

“If I had my choice then I would’ve told you. The day after it happened there was a war meeting between the Inner Circle to discuss what should be done. It was under Rhys and Feyre’s orders that no one outside of that room was to know the Colloden was still alive. They thought that it would effect your mental health too much if you knew, and when you woke up and had constant nightmares and were too sick to function, it only proved their point.” 

“You could’ve told me anyway. There was nothing stopping you.” She wrapped her hands around his arm and leaned more heavily onto him.

“Yes there was. Everyday that Kaden and Az couldn’t find you, everyday that you hurt yourself because of one of your nightmares, everyday that you had to stay in Velaris for your own safety - that was enough to stop me from telling you the truth. Because what if they were right? What if you spiralled out of control? I never could’ve helped you. That, Eleana, is what the Impeath should’ve shown you. There will never be anything more fearsome to me than not being able to help my family.”

“You’re saying all these nice things - it makes me want to stop being mad with you.” She murmured. 

“We should be happy. The Colloden is dead, the Impeath is dead, you have your wings back. We can finally relax.” He rested his head on top of hers and closed his eyes as well.  

“I can’t relax until I talk to Kaden. I also have some interesting things to tell you. I’ve had quite the adventure today.”

“Hm, I can see. Where does one even find a dress like that? Send Kaden a letter, talk to him properly tomorrow. You look exhausted.” She had heavy bags under her eyes and her body was limp against the stairs." 

“I’m in love with him.” She said so quietly he could barely hear her. 

“I know. I think he feels the same if it’s any consolation.” 

She sighed and he could feel her sliding into unconsciousness. With a huff, he realised the side of the mountain isn't the weirdest place to doze and joined her. 

 


	12. Chapter 12

 From not so far away, something of a different world watched two half-breeds napping on the side of a mountain. Curious, these creatures, seemingly having inherited the strengths of their races and yet the weaknesses of any young thing.

The girl was especially something to behold. It had watched her for a while. Watched her piece together the puzzle of its creations, give them the names it couldn’t pronounce in its otherworldly accent. It would be able to soon, just not while it was stuck in this skin. It had watched the girl struggle with the veilsinger – someone that must soon be destroyed. But yet, it was so entertaining to watch the two skitter around each other uncomprehendingly.  And it would not deny the male’s charms and looks had wheedled its way into its heart. He was unexpected, and made choosing a new body all that much easier.

But it would have to wait - there were many things it had to do before it took its new skin. Many things to be learnt, many things to become stronger in.

Why yes, it would have to be stronger than it had ever been if it was going to take _her_ skin, and she refused to settle for anything less than the power of the heir.

______

 

Mor had flown to Hewn City the morning after Starfall, and this time she was determined to get answers.

And she would, even if it meant that she had to leave her very muscled, very naked husband in bed while he smirked at her and gave her bed eyes and- ugh. Mor should’ve just let him taste her once more like he’d asked. Now she was just going to be thinking about it for the rest of the day.

But she had to focus. Her first visit to Hewn City to try and find Kaden’s mother had gone askew when they discovered a murder. Not unusual, but uncommon enough for it to draw her full attention. The second time, she had instead been somehow convinced to have lunch with her family – she lasted five minutes before breaking her father’s fingers and leaving with as much dignity as she could muster. Now, her third and hopefully final visit, she was hoping to finally find out if Kaden’s mother was in fact from the Court of Nightmares. It was probable – he was half High Fae and she doubted Azriel’s brother would bother with a bastard born outside of the Night Court. So either his mother was from Hewn City or she was from Velaris – and Mor doubted very much it was the latter. Every citizen always knew when a babe was to be born, it was such a momentous occasion!

Mor didn’t bother with her usual sultry attire as she walked into the entrance to the mountain. Instead, she wore steady leather boots and pair of dark pants and a knitted shirt. She would let nothing distract her from her main goal of searching through all the medical files they kept. She wasn’t hopeful, it was uncommon to keep a record of medical procedures, but a list of births was entirely possible. And anyway, she had to start somewhere.

She ignored any glances or looks thrown her way and made her way to the infirmary. She was met with a familiar, stiff-backed blonde fiddling with her painted nails and tried to hide her surprise at seeing Mor.

“I need your birth records,” she wasted no time with small talk or introductions, she came here to do one thing and one thing only.

“You aren’t privy to that information.” The attendant huffed.

“That was so stupid that I’m not going to even deign responding properly.” Mor snapped.

She frowned and with another huff, pointed Mor in the right direction.

Mor wondered over to the poorly labelled files. She scanned through until she found what looked like the birth records.

She immediately put back anything that wasn’t between nineteen and twenty-two years ago. Mor wanted to also check the years around his birth, lest Azriel’s estranged brother had lied about Kaden’s age.

She scanned through the papers. There wasn't much to go on, just a simple date with the child’s name and the parent’s as well. None of which would be much help in searching for Kaden’s mother.

Except,

In the year of his supposed birth there was one mention that stood out. There were four children born that year, more than expected, and one of them only mentioned the name of the mother - no father. Furthermore, the baby had since been labelled as deceased. The document claimed that the child had died during birth, but Mor would’ve known if something like that had happened. The mother’s name, Annalise, was one unfamiliar to Mor, something that also rarely happened.

She took the file away and presented it to the blonde. “Where can I find this female?” She asked.

The blonde looked down at the name and rolled her eyes. “I don’t know.” She scoffed.

Mor wasn’t in the mood to deal with stupid shit today, and held no restraint when she slapped the blonde across the face.

“Ouch!” She screamed.

“I’m not an imbecile. At some point in their lives every fae walks through these doors. Who is Annalise?”

The blonde was rubbing the spot where Mor’s hand had hit her, and winced dramatically. “I wasn’t _lying_. I don’t know where she is. To me it sounds like she’s one of the Forgotten.”

Mor hadn’t thought of that possibility.

The Forgotten of Hewn City, also known as the prisoners who weren’t bad enough for the underground fortress Amren escaped from.

“Why?” Mor was intrigued as to how this female came to that conclusion. If it was Kaden’s mother it wouldn’t be the most far-fetched situation a member of her family had been in, but it was still incredibly unlikely.

“Because Annalise is a Winter Court name - no one here would call their child that. And for there not to be a father listed? It probably means she had a bit too much of a good time with one of the guards and couldn’t remember which one.” She snarled.

“Well then it seems I just have to go give the catacombs a visit then.”

_____

 

Azriel supposed that at some point he should do something with his day. There was no point waiting for Mor to come home, she could take all day, and his brothers were too hungover to be much help. Azriel thought that today he should probably accomplish something with his time - even if he was the only person in Velaris currently able to.

The merriment of Starfall had left many incapacitated the following morning. As for Mor and Azriel, they enjoyed much more of each other than they did any alcohol. They both knew that the next day they had tasks to attend to. Mor was going to see if she could dig up anything more on Kaden’s mother, and Azriel had to do the one other thing they had both vowed to do before the end of the next month.

Today, Azriel was going to try to get Kaden to move out of that cauldron-forsaken tent, forcibly if necessary.

Is plan was somewhat… brutish? Certainly not. However, he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

That’s how Azriel found himself storming over to his oblivious nephew’s tent and throwing a wooden box at him.

He sputtered as it hit his arm and turned to face Azriel with an incredulous look on his face.

“What in the Mother’s name was that?” He gawked.

“Pack your things. Now.” Azriel had to be forceful. His brother had harshly ingrained Kaden with thoughts that he wasn’t good enough and it would take a lot to break through those beliefs. Azriel knew that Felix had already asked Kaden to leave this place and come live in his home, and Az thought of it like if Rhys or Cass had done the same for him. For Kaden to reject Felix’s offer, it meant he was serious about not leaving the place he believed he belonged as a bastard. Az had nothing but fondness for Kaden and Felix, and as he often told his wife, it was just like when he and Cass and Rhys were that age.

“Why?” Kaden didn’t move.

“Because you’re leaving this shit-hole. Hurry along, I don’t have all day.”

Kaden looked completely taken aback by Az’s words. “Are you serious?” He picked up the box from where it had landed on a pile of debris but didn’t make a move to start packing.

“Yes, I'm serious. You can’t be your best if you’re living in squalor.” 

Kaden stood up, anger taking over his features. “Did Felix put you up to this?”

Azriel was surprised by the question. Not because he thought it was unreasonable, but because it wasn’t like Kaden to talk to him in this fashion. “I haven’t seen Felix since yesterday, nor does he know that I’m making you do this.”

“Well then,” Kaden tossed the box over to Azriel for him to catch, “I guess I only have to say no to one person.”

Azriel caught the box and immediately threw it back. “I wasn’t asking, Kaden. Pack your things. You can’t continue to live here.”

“No.”

“No?”

“You have no right to tell me where I can and can’t live. It is one of the very few choices I have, and I’m making it.”

“One of the few choices you have? You may not see this yet, and one day I hope you will, but this?” Azriel swept a hand over the measly tent. “This was never your choice.”

Kaden turned his back and stopped talking.

“The male I’m looking at now is just a fraction of what I know you can be. It’s one thing to be a powerful magic user and lethal on a battle field, and another thing to have inner strength.”

Kaden was so still Azriel wasn’t sure whether he was breathing or not. “With all due respect,” he finally said, “it is not your place to speak to me about these things. You aren’t my regiment leader, and you aren’t my father.”

“Kaden… I don’t mind being that sort of influence for you though. If you ever need help, or someone to talk to-”

“I’ll go to Felix.” He deadpanned.

“Why are you so upset today? Is it because we haven’t found the creature yet?”

Kaden let out a hard and loud laugh, but there was no humor in his voice. “The creature? Oh, don’t worry, I found it alright. Right after it attacked Eleana and I. Maybe it wouldn't have happened if you hadn't stopped talking to me or turning up to our sessions. But it’s fine, you know? You’ve stopped talking to me, she’ll probably never speak to me again, Felix will inevitably leave once he finds something better, and I’ll be alone again! It’s so crazy too, because at some point I had convinced myself that I deserved to have people. I forgot what I was, _I forgot_.”

Kaden was shaking now, and Azriel knew that if the boy turned around there would be tears straining to escape his eyes.

“You said the creature attacked you and Eleana?” Azriel asked calmly. He wasn’t worried. He knew that if something terrible happened he would know by now, so the emotions weren’t coming from the attack itself, rather something that happened around that time.

“Don’t worry. We killed it.”

“Are you alright?”

At that, Kaden turned to face Azriel again, his head cocked in confusion.

“What?”

“I asked if you were alright. Did it hurt you?”

“Oh. Um, no. It didn’t.”

“I’m glad to hear it.”

There was an awkward pause.

“Aren’t you going to ask about Eleana?” He said hesitantly.

“I will check on her - definitely. But right now, I’m with you, and I want to know that _you_ are okay.”

“Oh.”

“Oh?”

“I’m just - I’m just surprised you’d ask.”

Before this year, Azriel had only ever seen Kaden once. The boy that he was then and the male that he is now are so vastly different and yet the same in so many ways.

It had been sixteen years ago. Azriel and Cassian were doing inspections of the camps in the Steppes region. It was a tedious job - not as bad as to had been before the war - but it was even worse when Azriel had to deal with his brother by blood. They were tense, very clearly trying not to rip out the throat of the other, and Kaden was a small four-year-old hiding behind Azriel’s brother’s leg, peering at him with wide eyed curiosity. The little thing was shaking like a leaf in a storm and his blonde hair nearly made Azriel laugh. What was such a bright thing doing in a place like this? Then Azriel and his brother fought, over the most meaningless thing looking back on it, and Azriel didn’t think about the child again until he saw him all these years later battered and bruised and broken.

Azriel had many regrets. One of the biggest was not whisking away that little bright boy and taking him home to his wife and family.

“Thank you, um, for asking.” Kaden continued.

The same shy boy who feared his own shadow even if he wouldn’t admit it. The different male who could take on a legion and win. The same Illyrian, who deserved love.

“Will you pack up your things now? I have a room waiting for you.” He said with as much kindness as he could muster.

“Thank you for your effort, but I must respectfully decline your offer.”

There was no breaking through to him today, not when something was going on with Laya.

“At least come have lunch with me then. If we’re lucky we can catch Felix and make him bake for us.”

A smile, hesitant and small but there all the same, graced Kaden.

 

_____

 

_Please, get me out of here…_

_I’m innocent. I swear on the Mother, I’m innocent…_

_My baby. I can’t find my child…_

_My husband. You must tell him I love him still. Even if he fucked that whore…_

_What’s a thing like you doing down here pretty lady?_

_Don’t step into the darkness, I won’t let you go…_

Mor rolled her eyes at the antics of the prisoners. Some of them were legitimately insane, and for them she felt sadness, but the others were just criminals wanting to either find a way free or do dirty things where the guards couldn’t see. What she didn’t feel was pity. Rhys and Feyre presided over the vast, _vast_ majority of people who found themselves here, and every single one of them deserved it. Down here it was rarely a life sentence, but what was only a few years to an immortal?

Mor walked swiftly down the hallways, leaving prisoners behind in her wake. She was in a mission to find the Control Guard’s base. She had only been there a handful of times and the caverns in Hewn City changed so often it was hard to keep up.

Eventually she found the dank offices. The fae occupying it seemed bothered by her appearance but didn’t comment when she demanded to know if the birth file she found matched anyone in the cells. They were much more helpful than the blonde and quickly scrounged up what she was looking for.

Annalise had indeed been a prisoner who had given birth with an unknown father twenty years ago. This report also said that the baby had died - not relevant considering they would have sent an Illyrian child away immediately - but it also added that the woman herself was dead.

This made it significantly harder to find the truth. On one hand, it could be a coincidence that another baby was born this year without a listed father, or Kaden’s mother wasn’t from Hewn City at all. Even worse, fake names were given to some of the prisoners for a multitude of reasons, and the blonde was accurate when she said Annalise was an unlikely choice of names in Hewn City. If this woman was Kaden’s mother, then Mor wouldn't even be able to tell him her real name.

Mor wouldn’t stop. She would search and search and search until she found _something_ to tell the young Illyrian.

______

 

Eleana waited for her parents to return home. She didn’t want to look for them - she wanted to put this off for as long as possible. She knew it was an unrealistic expectation, they would be home any minute, and then she would have to explain what had happened the day before.

Eleana’s body ached from the fight with the Colloden and her use of magic. It had been months since she had done anything like it, and her break in training manifested itself in muscle pain and fatigue. Napping on the side of a mountain probably didn’t help the issue either.

Eleana had already packed her things - she now had everything she would need to once again leave Velaris and move to the Illyrian camp. As much as she dreaded leaving she knew it was time to go back. Her wings were healed, and now she also had more pieces in a puzzle that only Felix could help her solve. To do that, she would need to be able to see him every day.

It was only a matter of time before her parents came laughing through the door, faces flushed and hanging onto each other. Like Eleana, they had also disappeared the night before.

“Hello,” She greeted them.

She could barely stand to be around them. If she had a different life, one where she didn't have responsibilities and people that relied on her, she would hide herself away so she didn’t have to ever face her feelings. She knew it was impractical to feel that way, but one can’t help what they feel.

“Butterfly!” Her father said enthusiastically. He marched over to give her a hug but stopped short when he saw her packed things and her expression. “What’s all this?”

Her mother joined his side and linked their arms.

“It’s my things. It’s time for me to go back to the camp.”

“What?” Feyre asked.

“I had an… encounter last night that made me realize that I need to start training again. I can’t just keep wasting away here.”

“Eleana, you aren’t wasting away! You’re recovering. There’s a huge difference.” Rhys reassured her. “What was this ‘encounter’ you had? I’m sure it can all be sorted.”

“Last night I was attacked by the creature that took me.”

Feyre gasped and Rhys rushed forward to grasp Eleana by her arms. “Are you injured? What happened? Where could this have happened? For it to come to Velaris and for no one to have seen it? By the cauldron Eleana.” He pulled her to him so that she was crushed against his chest in a hug.

She tried to move her arms to push him away but he was holding her too tightly. She felt her mother move to her other side and embrace her as well, trapping her between her two parents.

“I can’t answer you if I can’t breathe.” She choked out.

They both let her go but her father only moved back enough to cradle her face in his hands.

“Tell me everything.” He searched her face for bruises and was happy to see none.

“It doesn’t matter,” Her parents are the last people on earth that she’d tell _that_ story to. She had barely acknowledged to herself what her and Kaden did, what her and Kaden would most _definitely_ have done if they hadn't been interrupted. She certainly wasn't going to tell her father. Maybe her mother, but Cauldron have mercy on her if the High Lord found out.

“Eleana, it matters! Tell me.”

She pushed his hands away from her face so she could step into him instead. She had her hands wrapped around herself and tucked herself into him the way she did when she was a little girl. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his cheek on her head.

“I know,” she started and stopped. She took a deep breath and tried again. “I know that you knew it wasn't dead and didn’t tell me.”

Her father’s arms tensed around her. “How…”

“We felt it was for the best,” Her mother assured her. “We saw how bad you were, and we couldn’t risk doing anything that would make it worse.”

“I, I just… I don’t know what to say to you. I think I should just go back to the camp, find Alixia and start training again in the morning. Get my physical strength back, start reworking my flying.”

“You can start again here,” Her father urgently suggested, “with your mother and I. Who better?” He pushed her back to he could look her in the eyes again. “I’m not letting you go when you can get hurt. You’re too important, too special to me.”

“We’ll stay here, Laya.” Her mother said.

“I have to go back at some point, it may as well be now. I'm ready.” She asserted.

Her parents shared a look. “We thought maybe you’d like to stay.” Her mother said gently.

“I do. Velaris is my home, and it always will be, but it’s not what I need right now. When I’ve finished my training I’ll return home.”

“Eleana, that’s not what we meant. We meant not go back at all.”

Eleana was shocked by her father’s confession.

Stay in Velaris? Where she would be with the fae, where her magic wouldn’t be as marveled and more accepted, where she could walk the rainbow every night and live with both her parents and be in the same city as the majority of her family. Where she could fly over the sea and swim to her heart’s content and never have a single worry.

Stay in Velaris? Where she would never see the male she loved nor the cousin she held so very dear. Where she would likely become complacent, would wear dresses instead of leathers, would never attend a wedding with her mate.

To stay in Velaris meant leaving Kaden, and as angry as she might be with him right now she knew she could never do that. She was too far gone, in too deep. Felix would also be left alone - not a single family member there to protect him and care for him. Knowing what she did about Cassian and Nesta, Eleana could never possibly leave her best friend to his lonesome.

“I can’t.” She whispered.

“Why?”

“Because I have a whole life that I can’t just turn my back on at a moment’s notice.”

After a long discussion with her parents, they begrudgingly agreed with her. Her mother was upset, and Eleana knew it was a combination of her getting attacked again and he prospect of Feyre having to leave the love of her life.

Eleana gave them space to say goodbye to each other - it was a moment so private not even as their daughter did she feel entitled to watch it. Instead, she winnowed to the next person on her List of People to Talk to About the Attack.

It was crazy to think it was only the day before that she had done the same thing. Her night was going so wondrously before the Colloden found them. She hated to think of what it would have been like if they had never been attacked. How she probably would’ve taken Kaden home, and made him moan so hard the walls shook. She would’ve loved him, every single inch of his body, and he would’ve made her feel alight inside.

She winnowed to her house in the camp, the window still broken, and made the walk to Kaden’s tent and the notes in her jacket pocket that Tarquin gave her rustled with every step. She had only been there once before. She’d had no idea where it really was, so she closed her eyes like she did when she wanted to relax on her way home, but instead of thinking of home or clearing her mind she pictured him and just walked. When she opened her eyes, she could see him only metres away lost in his own mind.

She didn’t need to do that now, she’d never forgot the scrap he lived under, and made her way there. She practiced in her mind what she was going to say to him, again and again so hopefully when she did her voice wouldn’t shake like her hands were now.

When she got there, he was nowhere to be seen. She decided she would just wait for him to come back. She was just going to sit in his tent, but as she came closer she saw that although he wasn’t there a weird box was. Upon closer inspection, she saw that it was the same box people would use if they were moving somewhere. Hell, she had one just like it full of her possessions that she’d just left at the house.

Oh no. No no no no no.

There was no way he would leave. Was there? Not without telling her, not because of last night.

Her breathing became heavy at the thought, and she shot up into the air without a second passing. Felix would be home by now. Felix would know of Kaden was planning on going somewhere.

She flew as fast as she could, quietly reveling in the feeling even though she was still worried about Kaden.

She landed at Felix’s door and burst in. “Felix!” She shouted as she slammed into his house.

She was met with the confused gaze of not just Felix but also Azriel and Kaden. They were all in the kitchen cleaning up after a meal and Eleana found profound relief at the sight of her mate.

“Laya? What’s wrong?” Felix put down his dishtowel, he must be on drying duty, and walked over to her.

“Nothing,” she coughed. “Just, uh, yeah. I’m good. You?” She also felt mildly stupid at having been so worried when she literally found only a box. It’s just that the thought of him leaving scared the shit out of her. She could’ve stayed in Velaris, her true home, but didn’t want to largely because of him. If he wouldn’t do the same thing… it would hurt. A lot. How many times can she be rejected by him?

“I’m good…” He said slowly. “Would you like to join us?” He asked.

“Sure.” She put a fake smile on her face and looked at anywhere but Kaden. From the glimpse of expression she saw when she barged in he seemed worried to see her. It was a mutual feeling. Now that her anxiety had left because she saw he was still here, her mind wandered back to the feelings of betrayal she held.

She’d since realized though that she had no right to be mad at him for not telling her. How could she be when she was keeping a much bigger secret? There were two. Two things that she wasn’t going to tell him.

One, that he was her mate.

Two, that she was hopelessly in love with him.

Why? Because she knew what he was like. It didn’t matter that they’d kissed and where his hands roamed - it hadn’t been the first time he’d touched her with affection. It wasn’t even the first time he let her skim her hands over his sensitive wings. The reality was that at any moment he could distance himself again. He wasn’t ready for a mate, and he wasn’t ready for her to love him.

She sat down and let the three males silently work away at the dishes in the kitchen. The silence was extremely awkward and she wasn’t going to be the one to break it. She was trying to distract herself by twiddling her thumbs when Mor burst through the door with a sour look on her face.

She ignored everyone except Azriel, who she shook her head at and walked until she was in his arms.

Az whispered something in her ear, and she nodded. Felix was right next to them and acted like they were crazy. “Hey Mor, it’s lovely to see you. Yeah, I’m good. Thanks for asking. Love you too.” He rolled his eyes and skirted around them.

Eleana couldn’t help but look at them in envy. She looked at most relationships like that nowadays. She has to see her disgustingly in love parents everyday – Mor and Az are just rubbing it in at this point.

“Hello Poppets.” Mor finally addressed the rest of the people in the room even though she was still leaning heavily on Azriel’s chest.

“Hello Mor.” Kaden and Eleana murmured back.  

“I hate to cut our visit short, but Az and I need to attend to something. It was lovely seeing you. And, of course, especially you Felix.” She detached herself from her husband and gave them all quick pecks on the cheek. Felix and Eleana returned them but Kaden just sputtered and blushed.

They winnowed away to Mother knows where and left the three fae-Illyrians to their own devices.

“So.” Felix said way too perkily for it to be real.

“I brought the notes Tarquin gave me, I thought we could go over them. See if we can find out what it was.” Eleana suggested.

“Excellent idea my young cousin. We shall start right on that. I just need to have a quick word with someone and we’ll begin.” Felix clapped his hands and gestured for Kaden and Eleana to take a seat in the longue room while he proceeded to the door.

“Who do you need to talk to?”

Felix was an asshole. A sphincter of existence. Eleana could see exactly what he was doing – he was leaving her alone to talk to Kaden.

He winked at her and pulled the door open. “I had some business to clear up with my father. Now that the cat’s out of the bag about the Colloden I’m going to organize for Quathryn to visit. See you soon.” He waved and left.

Honestly, he’s such a _dick_ sometimes.

Eleana and Kaden were left in utter silence – him averting his gaze to anywhere but her.

“Hello,” She finally said.

“Hello,” He returned.

She was sitting on the infamous couch and he was across from her over the coffee table on the armchair.

A minute of quiet.

“Are you going to say anything?” She whispered - he well and truly heard her though.

“I don’t know what to say. There’s too many things.”

“Yesterday you begged me to let you explain.”

“I know, and there are so many things I want to tell you, Eleana, but I don’t know how. Or where to start.”

“Why don’t you start by telling me how everyone knew it wasn’t dead. I saw you kill it.”

“Your father and Azriel went back for its body only to find that it had disappeared. One might think that you simply weren’t able to see it, but there were marks to suggest that it had left sometime after us. A council was called, I know this from Azriel, and it was decided that you weren’t to be informed that it was still alive. Or anyone else, for that matter. Your Aunt Nesta and Uncle Cassian were designated to try and find out what the creature was and its origins, and Azriel was given the task of finding it. He wanted my help, thought I might be able to find it because I’m a veilsinger.”

“So did he really train you at all?”

“He did. I learned as I went. When I wrote to you, I didn’t lie. I was truthful about what Azriel and I were doing, though I didn’t mention the _how_ and _when_.”

“And not once did you think to tell me the what was really going on?”

He looked pained by her question. He stood up and stepped right over the table with his long legs so he could sit next to her. “Every day. _Every damn day_. It was hard not to - I was always thinking about you or writing to you or thinking about what I could say that might make you laugh.”

“Well you did – make me laugh, that is. Mor teased me about it all the time.” She smiled.

“I would throttle myself in training so that it went quicker and I could fly to see if another letter had arrived. You think your Aunt Mor teased you, but cauldron save me Felix was a menace.”

“Don’t take it personally, he’s always felt the need to insert himself in people’s personal lives. It’s endearing until it becomes annoying.”

“I was under strict order not to tell you, Eleana. I wanted Azriel t0 - I wanted to be his - Mother, I don’t know what I’m saying, but either way I was too scared to defy him.”

“And about yesterday.” She looked him in his black eyes. “I don’t regret anything.” She said softly.

She reached out to hold his hands but he pulled back. It was subtle, a movement so non-descript that she wouldn’t have noticed if she wasn’t so tuned into his movements.

“Eleana… Last night I was lonely and morose. I apologize for my actions. I, _we_ , shouldn’t have done that.”

She knew it. She fucking knew it. It was just like when they had danced at the bonfire, and whenever she tried to touch him on a bad day.

“Please forgive me, Eleana. I know I’ve given you the wrong impression too many times to count, but you’re one of my best friends. I can’t lose you. That is, if you’ll have me after taking advantage of you.”

Eleana stood up abruptly and pulled the notes out from her jacket. She started spreading them around the table while talking to him. “Don’t be an idiot, you didn’t take advantage of me. No one ever has, and no one will. I was raised too well to expect anything but perfect.”

“Good. That’s excellent.” He stood to help her but she pushed him back with her hands on his chest.

“Why?” She demanded. “Are you saying that if any female had come to you that night you would’ve done the same things to her that you did to me? Please, explain what’s so wrong about me.”

Her fists were balled at her side and she huffed in annoyance.

“It’s not about you at all, Eleana. It’s me, I swear.”

Eleana shouldn’t have brought it up – she didn’t want to know why he mate didn’t want her.

“Let’s just stop talking about it,” She turned away from him.

“No, Eleana. This is important.” He rested his hand on her shoulder. “Maybe if you weren’t the heir, and I wasn’t a bastard who’s never even met his mother. I won’t, _I can’t_ deny what I feel for you, and I will protect you from it at all costs. There are no disadvantages for me when it comes to being with you. But you? You’ll be ridiculed, looked down on, disregarded, just because I am the one sharing your bed. You are too important to me to let that happen. I refuse to ever have people look at you and treat you the way they do me. You have so many things to offer this world. This thing with the stories? Genius – neither me or Felix would have ever thought about it and we’ve read that book a million times between us. You are smart, and kind, and beautiful, and also really weird.” He laughed lightly.  “I wouldn’t change a thing about you. That is why we can’t do this, Eleana.”

She felt defeated by his words. “But you’ll be my friend? Even if it’s not enough for us?”

“Until my dying day. And anything with you is enough.”

“Okay.”

 ______

 

It watched them bicker. Even through the forest and walls and all other barriers it could feel their bond pulsing through the air. It wanted the heir, it wanted that power, and it didn’t know how long it could wait.

 

 


	13. Chapter 13

“I’m telling you, Mor! This isn’t going to work. Nothing is. I am doomed to my own damned existence and this is my fate.” Eleana sighed dramatically and threw herself onto Felix’s couch.

It had been moved, just like all the other furniture in the room, against the wall so there was a clear space in the room where they could move around. Currently it was only Mor and Eleana occupying Felix’s home, and they were hoping that they could at least show Felix some amount of progress before he came home from retrieving Quathryn from Velaris.

What they were doing was the worst kind of training. Eleana could handle flying and fighting and magic and whatever else was thrown at her, but there was one thing she had never successfully done. And that was dance.

Mor was trying, to no true avail, to teach Eleana traditional Illyrian dances that she would likely need to know when she went to Kaden’s cousin’s wedding.

“Maybe if you try with your father again…”

“I did yesterday. It didn’t end well.”

The High Lord had been good about it. It wasn’t the first time he had tried to teach her to dance like an Illyrian, and it also wasn’t the first time it had ended with a broken bone.

He had tried to demonstrate with her mother, and they looked perfect doing it. When she had tried to replicate it with him, it ended with her tripping and pulling his arm so hard that his shoulder dislocated.

He had tried to hide his pain, but it was so evident that Eleana refused to dance with him again, even when he insisted that if she wait an hour he would be fine again.

Like in the way he had tried to hide his pain, she had tried to hide her disappointment. Not in him, but in herself. He had come for the day to visit her and her mother, and he’d sacrificed nearly every moment he could’ve spent with his mate trying to teach his daughter to dance. He said he didn’t mind, _(“Not at all, Laya! How could I when I have such a beautiful dance partner?”)_ but she still felt guilty. She didn’t even know why she thought it might work. Her whole life she has been a pitiful dancer, and one spontaneous lesson with her father mere weeks before the wedding wasn’t going to change that.

As for the wedding… Eleana was still trying to conjure excuses for her overnight absence. Her mother and father had been keeping an extremely watchful eye on her since she had revealed that she was attacked by the Colloden. She had raged about it at first, furious that her mother would go as far as to watch her training sessions with Alixia, and worse dragged her along to the Autumn Court rather than let her stay in the camp alone. And her father. Oh boy, that was something. He would pop in at any moment unannounced and act more like a High Lord than a father when he spoke to her. He ordered, _ordered!,_ her to stay in his sights while he talked to various lords and Illyrians. If he was in the camp she was to be with him. The only exception to this was if she was with her aunts and uncles. Felix was out of the question.

He claimed to just be looking out for her – after all her transition to camp had been abrupt to say the least. And he wanted to spend time with his daughter, obviously.

Eleana suspected that the true reason was that when he looked at her, he couldn’t help but see her the way she had been right after the attack.

Eleana came to realise that her being in Velaris had been for him just as much as it had been for her.

After realising that, she had eased in her attempts to get away from her parents. So when yesterday he had asked her to escort him to the forest so they could practise taming her dark magic, she had asked him to teach her how to dance instead.

His face went from grave to alight with happiness in a split second. He was excited to teach her how to dance, and any previous memories from doing so in the past escaped him.

“Azriel is a superb dancer. We can try him next! Maybe Felix will help too.” Mor offered.

“What could they do that my father couldn’t? They were all taught by my grandmother. Well, not Felix, but he has a natural penchant for dancing.”

As if the mention of his name had summoned him, Felix crashed into his house will little Quathryn giggling like a maniac on his shoulders. He had a bag in one hand and was steading her with the other. Both had flushed faces from laughter, especially the little one.

“Baby!” Mor squealed at the sight of Quathryn. She tried to snatch her from Felix’s shoulders but he wrenched her away – sending her into another fit of giggles – before Mor had the chance.

“Sorry Aunty Mor. Brother’s only. Oh, and bastards. We ran into this one on our way in.” Felix threw the bag in his hands only for it to land neatly into Kaden’s. Felix had made such a show of coming into the house that Kaden’s presence didn’t register to Eleana, but there he was standing sheepishly in the doorway.

Mor beamed at the sight of Eleana’s mate, and moved over to him to squeeze him in a hug. “Kaden! How have you been?”

He leaned back from her and returned her smile. “Quite well, thank you. And you?”

“Better now that I’ve seen your handsome face!”

Kaden just nodded and let her go. He was still next to her when he turned to face Eleana.

After their last conversation, awkwardness was to be expected. What surprised Eleana was the level of understanding they had managed to have with one another now. It wasn’t the first time she’d seen him since they had talked about what happened before the Colloden attack. Hell, the first thing they did after that conversation was sit down with Felix and go over everything they had discovered and set up a plan for hours on end.

After that, she had approached him the next day to see if he still wanted her to go to the wedding with him, it was in a matter of weeks, and his response was an instantaneous ‘ _Of course I still want you with me_.’

He gave her a cautious smile and attempted to walk over to her. He was stopped, however, by Mor gasping and pulling him back by the collar of his shirt.

“What is that on your neck?” She demanded.

Eleana couldn’t see what it was, but it sent Mor into a spiral. “Why hasn’t that healed yet? It looks like someone has tried to slit your throat!”

At those words Eleana walked over to Kaden to see what Mor was talking about.

Kaden did have a bruised and bloody line of the side of his throat, only visible once he’d turned his side to Mor.

“It happened in training. It was my own fault.” Kaden shrugged it off.

“Have you even cleaned it? You’re just letting it fester! Come here and let me fix it.”

In Mor’s mind, ‘come here,’ actually meant, ‘drag Kaden across the room, force him to sit much to his protest, and force enough healing magic into him to make his marks disappear completely.”

If Eleana didn’t know any better, she would say Mor was… fussing over him? The way she did her nieces and nephew.

“You shouldn’t let it fester like that, young man. You’ll get an infection.” She said sternly.

“I’m sorry, Lady Morrigan.”

She hugged his head, just his head, she was quite a bit smaller than him, and smacked it when she was done. “Don’t call me Morrigan. Or lady. You are a strange child, but I am quite fond of you anyway.”

“I don’t know if that would be appropriate, Lady-”

“So tiny. Must protect.” Mor clung to his head again and peppered a quick kiss to his cheek.

This was not a strange way for Mor to treat someone. A tad strange for her to treat someone like that who she isn’t related to, but Eleana can understand that Kaden has that effect on people.

“How are the dancing lessons going?” Felix observed the moved furniture and Kaden flung Quathryn’s bag down so that it landed on the couch. Felix swept Quathryn off his shoulders and set her down at his side. She reached up and took his hand in hers, and Felix bent down so she wasn’t straining so far.

“I have yet to kill anyone.” Eleana huffed.

“Why are you taking lessons?” Kaden asked.

Eleana hadn’t felt the need to mention to him that she was desperately trying to gain at least a little skill before the wedding. It would be nice – nice to be able to dance with him just once and not have to worry about stepping on his toes.

“They’re traditional Illyrian dances. I thought if maybe I just knew one, then we could dance without the threat of me accidently injuring someone.” She said quietly.

Her inability to dance had always been an insecurity of hers. She just didn’t understand how she could be so monumentally bad at something when she tried so hard at it. She once enjoyed dancing quite a bit, but had become too shy to do in in front of other people. The last time she had danced was when Kaden took her to the bonfire, which remained to be one of the best moments of her life.

Kaden smiled at her answer, and held out his hands to her. “Well show me what you’ve learnt.”

Eleana’s face flushed and she stepped back.  “I don’t think that would end well. I’ll warn you, I’ve already maimed some of the most powerful fae in Prythian with my ‘skills.’”

“I have the upmost confidence in you.” He took her hands in his and guided her to the middle of their makeshift dance floor.

“Me next?” Quathryn jumped next to Felix to grab the attention of Kaden.

“It would be my honour, Lady Quathryn.” Kaden bowed and the youngling blushed and smooshed herself into Felix’s legs.

“Note to self, don’t let Archeron ladies near Kaden. They can’t control themselves.” Felix muttered under his breath.

Kaden rolled his eyes and brought Eleana in so she was close to him. It was not an abnormal distance, but it was closer than when she had been dancing with Mor.

Kaden started the dance and it took less than five seconds for Eleana to trip on his feet.

“Fuck. Shit. I’m sorry!” She blurted.

“No, no, it’s okay. Um, maybe if we try a different way of teaching you.”

She rested her head on his chest and sighed heavily. “There is nothing that can be done. Maybe I was cursed as an infant.”

Kaden laughed and smoothed back her hair. “I have another idea.”

She peered up at him and raised an eyebrow.

“I thought of it after the last time we danced.” He stepped away from her and took a fighting stance.

“What are you-”

“Respond the way you normally would.”

Then he struck.

Eleana dodged his blows, one after the other, stepping and swivelling around the room to avoid his attacks.

“Kaden.” Felix said unsmiling.

He didn’t stop, but rather sped up his attacks.

Eleana was no idiot though. He kept repeating the same attacks, so her dodges and counter moves also joined in his pattern. She was always on the defensive, not eager to go on the offensive against her mate – especially since he was a member of the Elite. This went on for twenty minutes before Kaden simply stopped mid-motion back where they had started.

“I hope you don’t usually fight like that. You’re moves are as predictable as the tide.” She clucked.

“If they’re so predictable then you won’t have trouble doing it again, will you?”

And so, she did, too many times to count. This time, however, they didn’t stop until she was breathless and her feet were stinging. The same attacks from him, the same dodges from her. Repeatedly until she could do it with her eyes closed.

“Okay, I’m sufficiently distracted and I think I know your moves better than you do. What was the point of that?” Eleana breathed.

“Do you remember every step?”

“I think it’ll turn up in my nightmares I know it so well.”

“So you think you could do it again?”

“Most definitely.”

“Well then,” Rather than attacking her when he neared, Kaden placed one hand on her waist and entwined his other with one of hers. “Do the steps again.”

Eleana stepped the way she had been, but his time she braced one of her hands on Kaden’s shoulder and squeezed his other. She had been fine when they were just fighting – that was something she had been trained her whole life to do – but now that she was dancing again her nerves came back with a vengeance.

She stepped, just like she did when he was sparring with her and… and she realised that his attacks hadn’t been coincidental or random. No, he attacked her in a way that made her step in the same places a dance would. And amazingly, mind-blowingly, she was doing it.

With every step her body became more relaxed and she let the memories take over. She closed her eyes and thought of where and what she had done when Kaden was fighting her, and her legs did the rest.

Then she stopped. And she opened her eyes. And she realised that she had just completed, without fault, a dance that she had been trying to learn for years.

Kaden was smiling broadly at her. Both his hands had moved to her shoulders and he was gripping her tightly.

“I knew you could do it. I knew it!” He beamed.

“Holy shit…” Felix gasped. “That was – Mother have mercy that was brilliant! Kaden, you sneaky shit when did you think of that?” Felix was in awe.

“I knew it wasn’t possible for you do be such a graceful fighter and yet not be able to dance. Eleana! Eleana?”

She wasn’t responding to his calls or touches – she was in shock.

She opened and closed her mouth, desperately trying to find words to express her gratitude.

“This is wonderful.” Kaden expressed. “I can’t wait until the wedding. Thank the Cauldron I’ll have you with me. Can you imagine it? The most beautiful, intelligent fae in Prythian and she’s going to be _dancing_. With me!” He cupped her face in his hands and rested his forehead on hers. “My best friend.” He whispered.

Eleana still couldn’t find the words, so she just pressed their cheeks together.

“Are you okay, Laya?” Mor approached the pair and laid her hand on Eleana’s head. She was smiling, but she also had traces of concern etched into her face.

Eleana nodded.

“Oh Mother. I think she’s gone into shock.” Mor put a hand over her mouth to try and stifle her smile. “I wish I could stay to see you do that again, but I have to be off to meet Az. But keep practising! Love you muchly,” She patted her head and then moved on to say farewell to Felix and Quathryn.

Eleana was content to just stand there pressed against her mate.

Felix, on the other hand, had a different idea.

“If you two are done, maybe we should do some actual work. I know it must be difficult, I, too, like to stare longingly into people’s eyes at random and sporadic moments.”

“Shove off,” Kaden winked at Felix and moved away from Eleana.

She supposed Felix was correct. They did have plans to make, big ones, and they needed to be clearly planned for their next moves to go ahead correctly.

Kaden strode over to Felix and punched him in the arm affectionately. He then dropped to his knees in front of little Quathryn. “Lady Quathryn, I believe I owe you a dance.”

She skipped into his outstretched arms and Kaden lifted her up and spun her around. He rested her on his hip and then sassily faced Felix. “I think this dance floor is inadequate for a Lady of her stature. I have a _much_ better idea.” Kaden smile was absolutely devilish.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking but I wouldn’t if I were you,” Felix pouted.

“But milady doesn’t have wings! How are we supposed to dance to the sound of the wind if we’re not in the sky?”

Felix’s reply was interrupted by a knock at the door. He rolled his eyes and muttered something obscene under his breath before pulling it open.

They were all surprised to see two of the bastard children from the share house at the door. It was two girls, one around ten and the other was the toddler that Eleana had once seen fall into a peaceful sleep on Kaden’s lap.

“Kaesi? Why are you here? Cellia is far too young to be wondering around at this time of night.” Felix bent down and picked up the tot. He ushered Kaesi, the older of the two, into his home and shut the door behind them.

“I’m sorry, Felix. I was sent with this letter and I didn’t want to leave her behind. Aron is being mean again. He keeps trying to put pencils up my nose!”

“Who gave this?” Felix asked.

He’d had a haunted look on his face as soon as she said she had a letter. Eleana, for obvious reasons, wasn’t there when the box of her body parts was sent to her family from the Colloden. She didn’t need to ask Felix about how that horrible moment tortured him – Kaden had told her all about it in one of their letters. She knew he felt guilty, and had assured him that it wasn’t anyone’s fault – least of all his – what had happened to her. But at this point, guilt seemed to be Felix’s resting state.

“Some lord from another camp.” She answered.  “Or his son. I can’t remember.”

“Good, hand it over. I’ll escort you and Cellia back once I’ve sorted it out.” He said gently.

“Oh, I’m sorry Felix, but it’s not for you.” She furrowed her eyebrows and turned to Kaden – holding out the letter to him. “He also told me to tell you he’s excited to see your guest.”

Kaden and Eleana shared a look of confusion. Kaden set Quathryn down and took the letter and pried it open. Eleana was tempted to snoop in its contents, but that would mean she is far more like her cousin than she was willing to be.

Kaden schooled his features into neutrality. Whatever the letter contained, Eleana was dying to know.

“Well?” Felix, too, was eager.

“Hm.” Was all Kaden said. “It’s serving time at the houses, you should take Kaesi and Cellia back before they miss out.”

Felix squinted his eyes at Kaden then nodded. “As you wish, my friend.”

Felix, still holding Cellia (even smaller than Quathryn), took Kaesi’s hand. “What an unexpected pleasure! Now tell me more about Aron.” He asked as he left his home with them.

Eleana waited for Kaden to say something. He sighed heavily and turned to her. “It’s from my father.” He deadpanned.

“What.”

“It’s instructions for the ceremony. He wants me, _us_ , to meet him and my brothers beforehand at his home so we can all go together. I suspect he’s aware you’re my guest, and wants to use you to make himself look better. I’m sorry, Eleana. That was never part of our deal.”

“I don’t care, Kaden. Where you are, I am.”

“It’s different though. At the wedding, with all those people, I could’ve kept you away from them. I… Eleana I don’t want you anywhere near them. They are horrendous-”

“Kaden, stop, please.”

He was anxiously running his hands through his hair and his face had become stricken.

She approached him and pulled his hands away from his hair, instead placing them around her. “We can say no. Or we can go if you want to. I’m not afraid of your family Kaden. If anything, I’m afraid I’ll gauge out their eyes the moment I see them.”

“Eleana,”

“It is up to you what we do. But either way? I’m with you. I’m at your side. Mother be damned if I don’t get that bloody dance you promised me.” She put her arms around his neck and drew him in close. “Remember when you found me in that cave?”

“I’ll never forget.”

“You told me that I owe you a dance. But Kaden, I owe you so much more than I could ever explain. I used to have this recurring dream – night terror, really – about this Room. I would be chained, or tired somehow, and some of the things that were done to me in these dreams… It’s only ever been paled since the Colloden. I used to cry and scream. I would have to sleep between my parents at night, and father would sing me to sleep. Sometimes it was tunes from Velaris, sometimes it was just one of my books that he would sing instead of read. I’ve had this dream about this Room for as long as I can remember. Since I’ve met you… I haven’t seen the Room in months, Kaden. You brought such light to the darkness that has always been around me, and whether we go to this wedding with your brothers or if we go alone, you will continue to do so for me. Nothing bad can happen if you are with me, and I hope it is the same for you if I am there.”

“Eleana.” He said faintly.

He pulled her into a tight hug.

“This is a happy day!” She tried to convince him. “We can dance together now! Without me, you know, maiming or killing anyone by accident.”

He snickered into her hair.

“We have so many problems to deal with right now. One of which has been staring at us for the past five minutes.”

They both looked up to see Quathryn sitting patiently on the floor a few paces away – staring at them and humming.

“Oh my,” Kaden let out a single, low laugh. “My apologies, Lady Quathryn.”

She smiled at Kaden, deep dimples peaking from her cheeks, and held her hands out to him.

Kaden, never one to defy a lady, picked her up once again.

“Are you going to tell Felix what was in the letter?” Eleana asked as Kaden gently rocked the little girl from side to side.

“It’s likely he’s already read it.”

“What?”

Kaden waved his fingers at her – the empty hand that only a minute or two ago was holding the letter. “I’ve been practising my winnowing. It seems I can now move small objects small distances. Well, that or some random Illyrian just got a very random and seemingly lovingly letter.”

 

_____

 

It took an hour for Felix to settle Quathryn to sleep. Kaden had taken her flying, and it had got her so excited that she refused to sleep, even if she was clearly exhausted. She was tucked in tight to a cot that he set up next to his bed so he could keep an eye on her. Quathryn was far too precious to let out of his sight for the whole night.

Meanwhile, Kaden and Eleana cleaned up after the extravagant meal Felix had cooked for them. It had been three courses and all had been overly sweet. Especially the dessert. He had made an ice-cream cake with chocolate decorations. It was Quathryn’s favourite, and she had clapped her hands and jumped with excitement when Felix brought it out. He’d gone all the way to the Summer Court to get the ice-cream, claiming that they had the best in Prythian.

Anything for his sister.

When Felix came out he collapsed onto the now righted couch. “Let’s get this over with. I need to sleep before I report at dawn tomorrow. Ideas?”

They had all been brain-storming ideas about where to go from here now that they had evidence that something was going on. None of them knew what to do though. The only connection they had between all the strange killings was the storybook, and that was available throughout not just Prythian, but also the Mortal lands.

“I had a thought, I don’t know how useful it’ll be though.” Eleana said as she walked out of the kitchen. Kaden stayed, he was drying what she had just cleaned.

“I’ll take anything at this point.” Felix sighed.

He was lost for ideas. He usually prided himself in his ingenuity – whether it was in his baking or his fighting or any menial task he had. He had the capabilities to lead an army, his Elite alone was more powerful than some armies, the strength to fight for his loved ones, but this was something out of his depth.

“It’s nothing great, but it might be a start. When we fought the Impeath, no one believed we had gone Under the Mountain because when Mor investigated it the wards were intact. I say we go back. Now that we have more knowledge and Kaden has a better grasp on his magic, who knows what we might find? It’s where this all started, and I know I’d certainly like to know why the wards were fine after I know I damaged them.”

Felix weighed her words. She was correct – it was something they would have done ages ago if it hadn’t been for the Colloden.

“We’ll leave the day after next.”

“Why wait so long?” Kaden asked curiously from the kitchen.

“Because despite knowing how important this is, I’m also not willing to give up any of my time with Quathryn.” He answered simply.

“Fair enough.” Kaden chirped.

“It’s decided then. We’ll start at the Mountain.” Felix got up from the couch with a heave and then stretched his wings and arms out. He looked out the wide window adorning the front of his home. “I’m afraid it’s time for you to go home Eleana. Feyre will start to worry if you take much longer.”

Felix felt ashamed that he wasn’t deemed one of the people Eleana was allowed to be ‘supervised’ by. At the same time, though, he knew it was just because Rhys was so paranoid.

“I’ll walk you home.” Kaden had a dishcloth and was drying his hands as he walked into the room. He threw it on the table as he passed it and offered his arm to Eleana.

“Thank you, but I think I’ll take a quick detour to Velaris. I want to show my father the dance.”

She waved to the as she left – winnowing away and disappearing as soon as she crossed the threshold.

“I should head off anyway.” Kaden yawned. “Don’t forget it’s me who you’re doing dawn duty with.”

Felix peered at his friend. “You could just stay here the night.” He suggested.

“Are you trying to seduce me?” Kaden covered his mouth like he had just heard some scandalous gossip.

“Unfortunately for you, I’d rather not compete with the affections of my cousin. But, it’s so strange.” Felix put his hands behind his back and dawdled over to a closed door. “I just happen to have a spare room I think you’d enjoy.” This time it was Felix’s turn to scandalously cover his mouth.

Kaden snorted. “Nice try, but I’d rather your seductions. I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”

Kaden left, and Felix wondered how long it would take him to convince the stubborn male to just move in already.

Oh well, it was a problem for another day.

He turned to go wash up, and saw Quathryn standing at his bedroom door rubbing her eyes.

“You should be asleep,” He reminded her. She reached her arms out to him and he picked her up. He may usually be alone in his house, but for now he had the best company he could think of. “But we may as well have hot cocoa while you’re not.”

 

 

 

                                                        

                                                        

  
  
  


 


	14. Chapter 14

Kaden quite enjoyed the view that the mountains offered at dawn. It was different to any other time of day, especially on quiet mornings like this one.

He had been here for hours, Felix at his side and a deck of cards in between them to pass the time. Even though Felix led the Elite, and Kaden was now a member of the first row, they still had to do the menial duties that every other Illyrian had to. This included taking watch on the most illogical place for an enemy to attack and the safest when it came to where they could be breached.

The sunrise stained the sky pink, the same colour of Eleana’s cheeks when she blushed, and made a lovely gradient of purple and pink and white that would eventually change to the stunning blue of the Night Court in Spring. Sometimes Kaden wondered how the other Courts functioned when they could only experience the joys of one season.

“-So I think if we retake the same route as last time, and try to enter from the same place it should be a success. I’m going to station the Elite on duty nearby so that I can summon them if we need them.” Felix had been prattling on about their plans on and off since they started duty together at sunset. Kaden was only half listening at this point – Felix was repeating the same things they had been saying for the last two days, likely from nerves.

Their last visit to the sacred mountain had not ended brilliantly, and Kaden hoped that today would not have a similar outcome.

“Worse comes to worst I can always summon my father, but that really is a last resort.” Felix continued. “I also don’t want to separate him from my mother right now. They have both gone into full nesting mode. He’s convinced the baby is going to be a girl, and mother keeps fighting with him because she thinks it’s a boy. At this rate, half the nursery will be pink and the other blue.”

“What do you think it will be?”

“Me? I’m putting my bets on a girl. It would be nice to have another sister, she would keep Quathryn better company than a boy would.”

“Don’t you want to know what it’s like to have a brother?”

Felix scoffed at Kaden’s question. “That’s why I have you.”

Kaden rolled his eyes and got up from his sitting position. He stretched and looked out on the horizon. Soon Illyrians would flood it with journeys to somewhere, but he was waiting for that one person to appear in the distance.

“You can get that look off your face.” Felix, who had taken to lying down with his hands behind his head like a pillow, waved his foot at Kaden’s face. “She has training with Feyre this morning to work on her shapeshifting. She’ll get here when she gets here. Besides, the longer she takes the longer I don’t have to put up with you two skirting around your feelings for each other. You two make me suffocate.”

Kaden looked down on the smirking Felix. “We’ve talked about this already. Eleana and I are fine, no suffocating on our end. Maybe you’re struggling to breathe because of your over-enlarged ego.”

“No need to be biting,” Felix jumped up and shoved Kaden lightly. “I just want what is best for you two. It just so happens that in my wise old age, I can see that the best for you two is each other.”

Kaden rolled his eyes. “You are _ridiculous_.”

“I am _correct_. Please, tell me why you hold her so close, make her think she has a chance, treat her so endearingly, and yet you don’t want to be with her? Rather curious, don’t you think?” Felix said with glee. He was happy most likely because he knew he _was_ indeed correct.

“Oh shut up.” Kaden had no better response.

“Kaden,” Felix – suddenly serious, “Just try not to hurt her too badly, okay? She’s not rational when it comes to you, doesn’t know to protect herself.”

“I would never hurt her-”

“I know. I _know_ you would never do something intentional. I just - I know what’s happened between you two, and I don’t know how many times you can reject her before she gets irrevocably hurt.”

“I’m sorry-”

“Don’t be sorry, Kaden.” Felix interrupted. “You’re my friend, and I value that. I’m not mad, I truly do just want the best for both of you. I know she makes you happy.”

“That’s a moot point. You make me happy too.”

“If you made me happy the way you make her happy, our friendship would be a very different one. And it would probably involve more couches.” He wiggled his eyebrows.  

“ _Cauldron_ , why must you take it to such weird places?” With Kaden’s laugh, the seriousness surrounding the two fae-Illyrians faded away.

The two resumed another game of cards. Their watch would be officially over in two hours, and in that time, hopefully Eleana would appear and they could make their way to where all this trouble began.

Much to Felix’s dismay, Kaden was astoundingly good at cards, and as much as he tried to beat the younger male, it could not be done. They were laughing and joking with each other, to the point where Eleana’s arrival was barely noticed.

She landed subtly in a place she thought she couldn’t be seen, and pretended to attack the males. They both pulled out their swords, ready to strike, but stopped when they saw it was her.

“Glad to see you’re ready to go.” She smirked.

“How goes the shapeshifting?” Felix asked as he put his sword back in its sheath.

“It’s going well. We worked on me for a little bit, but then turned our attention to shifting the things around us. Maybe I’ll turn you into a pig.” She goaded her cousin.

“Even as a pig I would be more attractive than you Eleana. As soon as our replacement gets here, we’re off.”

 _____

 

It didn’t take long for them to arrive at the entrance to the Mountain.

It was the same as it had been last time. They passed the statue of Eleana’s parents, wandered long the path and found the section of stone that they had entered through last time.

Eleana tested the wards and found them completely intact. In fact, they felt stronger to her than they had the last time.

Behind her, Felix and Kaden were checking all the gear they had brought. Felix donned not only his sword at his side, but also multiple knives and daggers along his chest and a bow and arrows on his back. Kaden was the same, but had more weapons concealed than Felix did. Felix, in this situation, had the advantage of his magic. He had the magic he’d inherited from his mother, but also tenfold of his father’s killing power. Kaden may be a veilsinger, but he was unmatched when it came to either Felix or Eleana’s raw ability to destroy.

“Can you break them again?” Felix prodded.

Eleana felt the magic of the wards like a physical shield that she could touch with her own. It would bend around her, twisting to meet her influence, but unlike last time it didn’t seem as though it would break.

She tried again, this time pouring more of herself and her darkness into it, trying to find a weak link in the shield. But it wasn’t like last time. It didn’t break, it didn’t falter. The only thing it did was stretch thinner in the places she was concentrating on. That wasn’t enough to be able to winnow all three of them in though.

But…

“I don’t know if I can get us in.” Eleana told them. She explained what she was feeling with the wards, and Felix skimmed them with his own magic to see what she was talking about. “I don’t think I could winnow three of us in. But if I was to go alone…”

“No.” Kaden and Felix said instantaneously.

“It’s too risky.” Felix continued. “We have no idea what might be down there. In all honestly we might not even be able to find things without Kaden’s help, and we also won’t be able to summon the Elite if we need them. Going alone is out of the question.”

“You’re being irrational. I won’t engage with anything - I’ll just observe and leave. This is the only thing we have. I have to at least _try_.”

“Not going to happen. Either we all go or not of us do. Need I remind you what happened the last time we went Under the Mountain?” He seethed.

Eleana saw right through him. He wasn’t mad at her suggestion, not really, it was more that he was worried for her.

He stood in front of her with his hands crossed over his chest, nostrils flaring. She stepped up to him and gave him a reassuring hug. It was awkward considering he didn’t move his arms.

“How about this: I’ll go to observe, and if I’m not back in three hours you can either try to come in yourself, or more likely an option, you can summon Mor to help break the wards. Out of everyone I think she’d be the least angry about us doing something like this.”

Kaden stepped up next to Felix. “This is… not the best option.”

Felix humphed in agreement.

“But it might be out only one. This is bigger than us. If you encounter anything dangerous though, leave. Immediately. If you’re injured, or something unexpected happens, come back to us straight away.”

“I will,” Eleana assured her mate.

She turned her back on the two and rested her hands on the rock once more. Tendrils of darkness escaped her fingertips, curling around the stone and wards. Eleana’s skin was the opposite, radiating a small glow that often came when she was using excessive amounts of her darkness. She pushed at the wards, their difference from last time astounding her, and once she found a patch that stretched she attacked it with everything she had. As she blasted the wards, trying and trying to break through, she could feel wind whipping around her. It wouldn’t be the first time Eleana had accidently used one of her powers by accident. The part she was stretching became even thinner, but it appeared the ward was rejuvenating itself.

If only she could get just a slither of space, it would be enough for her break-

There.

The gap was the size of a pin head, but that’s all she needed to winnow in.

_____

 

Eleana had her flames in front of her, but rather than stretching them out she had them only far enough in front of her so that she could see the general vicinity. She had to trust her senses, and trust her darkness, that if there was anything lurking in the shadows she would know. The brighter she was, the more attention she would potentially draw to herself if there was in fact more than just an Impeath in this mountain. Her darkness was like a living thing, an extension of herself, and she trusted it as much as she did her sight or touch.

She wandered the approximate path that they had last time. Her theory was that if she followed that path than eventually she would find wherever in the mountain the Impeath was living. From her understanding, they were solitary creatures, but if someone, or something, was somehow creating these creatures than it might be here as well.

That was the explanation Eleana was running with where the book creatures were concerned. That somehow they were being created – she didn’t know what other possible explanation there could be. Especially since the creatures detailed in the book had been extinct for millennia, or simply never existed at all.

This would also explain why their Impeath wasn’t an Impeath at all. Rather the tale the High Lords told to their people so they didn’t have to say that what was really terrorising them was something that barely came up to their knees.

Eleana cautiously wandered along, stopping every now and again to observe her surroundings. Eventually, she was led into the same Middengard Maze. Felix had known what it was as soon as looking at it, and it undeniably fit the description of the maze her mother had found herself in all those years ago.

But as her father had pointed out, that maze was destroyed after the war. So maybe, just maybe, whatever was building the creatures had also rebuilt this.

And if they could rebuild this, then maybe they were capable of rebuilding the wards.

This was a thought Eleana hadn’t shared with either Felix or Kaden. It made the situation they were in considerably more dangerous, and if they had known then they never would have let her come on her own. It wasn’t about them being controlling or not thinking she couldn’t handle it on her own, it was about her safety.

She saw the path her and Kaden had taken when they heard Felix’s screams and followed it. When she entered the space they had all fought in, she halted to take further care. There were still blood stains on the floor.

She walked the parameter of the room. There was nothing overly shocking to see. Nothing that you wouldn’t see in any caverns in any mountain. Unfortunately for Eleana, there also seemed to not be other ways out of this particular cavern. With a frustrated sigh, she pushed away from the wall, only to trip.

“What the…” She looked down and noticed that her foot had caught itself in a small crevice. Except upon closer inspection, it looked like it could be made wider if you just dug around it a little bit.

Eleana shrugged. It’s not like she had anything else to go on.

She dug her hands in and cleared away the dirt. She was expecting to maybe find something buried, or the remnants of a caved in passage. What she was not expecting was a trapdoor.

She pressed her ear down onto the steal to see if she could hear anything under it. After not hearing anything, she tentatively opened it and peered in.

It was pitch black. She extended down her vines of fire and saw that below the door was a passage of stairs that winded down.

Okay then.

If anything went wrong, she could just winnow away. She repeated that to herself in her head and she eased her way down onto the stairs made of packed dirt, and as she closed the trapdoor behind her.

As she walked down the stairs, she realised that this had once indeed been a collapsed passage that someone, or thing, had dug out. It only went down. And down and down, until there wasn’t any further to go. Not only could she not go any further down, but there were only walls around her.

Eleana panicked for a moment. The space was so small. It was okay when she was moving, but now that she was standing still her mind kept flashing back to when she had been in that cave and the Colloden had-

Her breathing was laboured, and a small voice in the back of her head, one that sounded suspiciously like Kaden’s, told her to calm down, that everything would be fine, she just needed to relax.

She squatted down and wrapped her hands around her knees and tucked her head in. The only sound was her breathing and her heartbeat.

She made the light from her flames brighter, she need not worry about someone seeing her down here, and saw strange shadows dancing on the floor.

She peered closer at it, and cringed back when she realised the small shadows were from the uneven gradient of another rickety trapdoor. This one was wooden, and had clearly seen better days. It could collapse at any moment. And she was standing right on top of it.

She cringed and positioned herself onto the last step, and used her magic to open this door because of the weird angle.

Unlike the steal one above her, this was creaked and groaned as it opened and she could definitely hear something below it. She dimmed her lights until she was in near black.

This door had no steps beneath, just a drop that led into another cavern. Counting to three, she jumped and landed lightly on the balls of her feet.

Eleana was versed in history, and a large part of modern history had been the reign of Amaratha. As a child, her tutors had focused on what had happened to the nobles, why wouldn’t they? Eleana was a noble. But as heart breaking and horrifying as her parent’s story was, Eleana felt a great deal of pain when it came to the people Amarantha hadn’t deemed worthy enough to torture in person.

Below all the workings of the nobles above, there had been death prisons below. The lesser fae and faeries had been tossed down here like they were worth nothing and left to die. Starvation and disease were rampart, and led to horrible things such as cannibalism and suicide.

Eleana had once talked to a survivor from Below, and it was harrowing. They’re hard to come by for many reasons, but for Eleana there were two main ones. Firstly, none of the citizens of Velaris were survivors since none of them had been Under the Moutain. Of course, if immigration was approved by the High Lord or Lady, survivors may be allowed to live in Velaris. But after Amarantha and Hybern, most simply returned to their homes in their own Court.

Eleana didn’t need to have ever seem drawings of that place of the Mountain to know that this was it.

The prison was like an underground city.

There were small huts and shelters that had been built. It went for as far as she could see, but she knew from stories that there were more layers below this one. The place could only be accessed to through doors in the ceiling like the one Eleana had just used, and only sections of the prison had been destroyed. This was because of how vast it was. They wanted to erase the atrocities of Below, but destruction like that would mean destruction of the sacred mountain itself.

There was one story about this prison that always sent shivers down Eleana’s spine. There used to be an area of the prison that didn’t have a ceiling, but rather just an opening that Amaranatha could look down at her leisure to torment the fae below. She used to do awful things from this balcony of sorts, including stealing away children just so she could throw then down again and watch their bodies splat and break as they hit the rocky ground, throw scraps of food to watch the riots that would incur, and so many other unspeakable things.

Every layer was warded so that no magic at all could be used. This was in the history books. What wasn’t was her father’s story with the pits. How Amarantha had suspected someone had been using magic to take away the suffering – not her father – so she added extra wards as well as hay. A bountiful amount that the faeries used for bedding. It all went away the night Amarantha had set it all on fire just to watch them burn, and the High Lord of the Night Court could do nothing about it.

No, that wasn’t in history books, but it was in her father’s nightmares. That was the only reason Eleana knew, and she had no doubt there were many more like it that she had never heard.

Eleana made fire roses and planted them around the entrance she came through so she could find her way back. She then went back to her wondering, trying to find what she could hear making the noises.

_____

 

The heir’s smell had never been so strong than it had when she was in its home. It had been following her since she had arrived, torn between stalking her or watching the veilsinger. The veilsinger, it decided, would stay put, the heir’s curiosity would not let her.

It saw her find the trapdoor, saw her wind down all those stairs, saw her nearly cry as she realised that she was completely and utterly alone – or so she thought.

It watched her leave a trail of roses made of blue fire. Saw her find charred bones and cells made to contain the unruly ones.

It saw her skirt past the opening that could only be seen from a certain angle that led to her creature children.

It smelt her fear when she realised that she was not alone.

_____

 

Eleana felt sick from the things she had seen. She had uncovered bones, some adult sized and some small enough that they could’ve only come from a child, and the scent of burning flesh had lingered after all this time. It was as if their souls had imprinted on their bones. She had not dared enter the makeshift homes, scared of what she would find.

She didn’t feel like gagging until her magic shivered up her arms to tell her that she was not alone in this prison.

And that whatever it was knew she was here as well.

There was no point now hiding herself in the darkness, so she spewed flames out all around her, lighting up the space for as far as she could see.

The light was illuminating in more than just the practical sense. It let her see indents in the ground from where people had walked endlessly for fifty years, ridges in the wall from where someone had compulsively run their fingers repeatedly, and where she herself had been walking from the unsettled dust that showed her footprints.

Eleana couldn’t help but feel she should have been doing this the whole time. What else could she have missed?

This is why she needed Felix for these things, he would know exactly what to do.

She scanned the area around her and couldn’t see anything but the flickering shadows from her flames.

Then in the distance, so minute she could barely hear it, was the sound of footsteps.

She was almost too nervous to find out what it was considering what the last two things had been and done.

One can imagine how horrified she was then, when she brightened and extended her flames and didn’t see one creature.

No, Eleana saw a heard of beasts.

They had just been standing there, stationary, when Eleana stepped back and stepped on a bone, making a clear _crack_ echo through the area.

All together the assorted beasts looked up at her. More horrifyingly, they then snarled. They were a distance from her, close enough to make out their bodies but far enough away that she couldn’t discern any specific features. Eleana thanked the Mother for this, because they next thing they did was _run_.

Eleana’s eyes widened in fear. She did not have enough training to deal with at least _one hundred_ deadly creatures sprinting towards her head on. So she did what she promised her cousin and her mate she would do if anything happened. She bolted.

Eleana turned on her heels and tried not to look back at what was running towards her – she could hear them well enough to know how close they were. She could hear them scraping, huffing, snorting, screeching, and it sent pure fear into her veins.

_She would not be taken again she would not be taken again she would not be taken again_

She scrambled to follow her trail of fire roses that she had left behind her, extinguishing them as she passed them. She also flung her darkness out around her as a deterrent to the creatures and brought in her flames. She didn’t know if any of them relied on sight, but she would try and limit them in any way that she could.

She weaved in and out of the faux streets, pulling on the ‘houses’ to steady herself every time she flung around a corner.

When she finally made it back to the trapdoor it was closed, where she could’ve sworn she left it open. She flapped her wings hard and once so that she had enough power to slam into the door and continue up, but the second part of her plan was thwarted. No matter how hard she banged on the door, it would not open. Neither, she realised, could she winnow.

Was it the lasting effects of Amarantha’s magic? She didn’t want to find out.

When she pushed the door, it felt like something was on the other side pushing it right back.

Eleana let out a frustrated scream. The beasts were getting closer and the nearer to her they were the more she panicked. She blasted as much wind she could into a shield in hopes that it would at least gain her a few more minutes to figure out how to get out.

She pulsed even more magic into the door, but it was sealed. She tried to winnow again, using the same ward breaking method she had on the outside of the mountain but to no avail. She even tried to mist the door, but it seemed if it was going to open it was only going to do it from the other side.

Her panic increased. Her shield of wind started to cloud from the dust that the raging creatures were stirring up from their run.

“ _Shit_.”

She stopped to think. The only thing she did was reinforce her shield.

She couldn’t winnow without using all her magic to break whatever wards might still be in the Below. That would mean no shield, and she didn’t even know if it would work. She couldn’t break the door itself, and even if she did that left the option of the creatures somehow following her. She couldn’t break through the rock above her and make her own shaft up, it was too thick.

Was this all just an elaborate trap?

The first _bang_ happened as a wave of beasts rammed into her shield. The dust was too unsettled for her to see too much, but she was sure that among the throng of creatures vying for her, she saw another Impeath.

She had to find a solution, and she had to find it _quickly_.

As the creatures rammed into her shield, they pressed in it closer to her. It was out of her control, and it was clear that she wasn’t the only magic user here. As they ran into it, bodies bouncing off it and making loud noises as they did, her walls of wind tightened.

No. Cauldron no.

As much as she knew her efforts were futile she banged on the door again. She screamed in fear and frustration, and a few tears ran down her face as she thought the only thing she could do now was turn and fight and take out as many as she could while she waited for the three hours to be up and for Felix to summon someone to save her. She had only been Under the Mountain for an hour and a half, if she was estimating correctly, and she didn’t think she would survive another hour or so of these creatures ripping at her. She could try, and she would fight to her last breath, but these monsters had been killing trained Illyrians and Fae centuries old who had fought in countless battles and war. She was seventeen.

And she was terrified.

There were only a few paces of safety around her now, and she could see deformed and monstrous bodies off all shapes and sizes pushing up against her hardened wind. Not only bodies, but teeth gnawing to slice through and claws longer than Eleana herself.

She pushed her shield again, but it gained her barely any traction when there was just _so many._

Only a foot from her body now, and no pounding or screaming was going to open that door.

She let out a blood-curdling scream as fingers wiggled into the area beneath her feet. The only thing keeping her airborne was her hands and feet braced on the wind – her wings too constricted to be of any help.

Eleana was crying now. She whispered prayers to the Mother and to the Cauldron, and thanks to her family. She knew that they would never hear them, but she still wanted the words to be out there – didn’t want her last words to Felix and Kaden to be a false reassurance and to her mother a quick goodbye and to her father a hurried goodnight. She wanted time to tell them how much she loved them.

To tell Kaden that he was her mate and that she loved him and that he had only seen her at her worst and she longed for the day where he could see her at her best because Cauldron then he might love her too.

To tell Felix that he is the best friend and brother that she could ever have dreamed for and for him to be strong enough to deal with the problems he was having with his parents because _she knew_ how strong he could be.

To tell her aunts and uncles thank you for their unconditional love, even when she was an undeserving brat. How many could claim the love she had?

To tell her mother and father how much she loved them and how much she despised the idea of being High Lady because the day she was High Lady was the day they were dead but if they died part of her would as well.

The bodies of the beasts were an inch away from tearing at her skin, and Eleana was ready to drop her shield and fight. She breath shuddered, and tears were covering her face, but if she was going down she wasn’t going down alone.

On three, she would take it down.

One, she said her thanks again.

Two, she wished she could’ve had more time,

Thr-

The door opened. _It fucking opened_.

Eleana didn’t have time to be relieved because she was pulled through the door to then have it slam shut behind her.

Strong, tan arms were around her and Eleana couldn’t help but sob into Kaden’s chest as he held her.

“How?” Was all she could say.

“I felt your panic. Somehow. I don’t know.” She was in his lap and he had buried his head into the crook of her neck, muffling his words. “Felix and I tried to take the wards, and together we could manage to get one more person through. It was decided I could find you quicker. And _Cauldron_ Eleana, if I had been only a minute longer, or if I followed the wrong trail-”

“Thank you,” She gasped.

“What in the Mother’s name _was_ that?”

“I don’t know,” She cried. Her tears were no longer those of fear, but of pure, unassailable relief. “I have to tell you something-”

“Not here, okay? We need to leave, right now. We should never have let you go.” Kaden stood, pulling her up with him. His hands were still tight on her waist and her hands moved to his shoulders. “We need to get back to Felix, he’ll freak out if we don’t get back soon.”

Eleana nodded and moved her feet up the steps, but not away from him. She dragged him by his shoulders, keeping them pressed together as they ascended the stairs.

They climbed together, Kaden supporting her, until the next trapdoor. This one, gloriously, was still open. Kaden let go of her and climbed out first, offering her a hand when it came to her doing it.

They were silent as they ran out – hands held tightly together as they tried to get out. Unlike when they had come in, getting out wasn’t nearly as much of a problem.

They burst into the fresh air, the mid-morning sun blindingly bright after so long in the dark.

Felix had been pacing, and stopped as soon as he saw them come out. He ran to her and stopped a foot away with his hands braced on her shoulders. He assessed her for any injury, and upon not finding any, scooped her up in a bone-crushing hug.

“What happened? Thank the Mother Kaden said something was wrong. Was something wrong? Are you okay? Tell me everything that happened from the moment your foot stepped in there to the moment you came out. Everything. Right this instance.” He rambled.

She hugged him back tightly and said what she had been thinking since Kaden rescued her.

“I think we need to tell my father what’s going on.”

 

 


	15. Chapter 15

Eleana was ready to go, just waiting for Kaden to hurry up. Who knew getting dressed could be such as task?

“Hurry up you bastard!” Felix was also impatient. He had offered them his house to get ready, since it’s not like they had anywhere else to go. For the next two days, Felix was taking the Elite on a mission to the mortal lands. Eleana’s mother was under the assumption that that’s where her daughter was going to be. It wasn’t a lie, per se, Eleana was going to be with a member of the Elite, just not the one she was related to.

Eleana stared down at the dress she had chosen for the wedding. It was backless, like all her dresses, but was held up by a halter around her neck. From the neck, it parted in two to cover her breasts but leave a sliver of skin exposed. It cinched at her waist, and then flowed down like a waterfall. When she walked or turned, she giggled from the way it would swoosh around her.  She had chosen to wear black, but silver detailing in patterns of roses ( _what else for her_?) covered the whole dress. Her hair was in a tight bun so that when she went flying it wouldn’t mess up.

Her and Kaden would do a lot of flying today. Firstly, they had to fly to the camp he was raised in so they could join his father and brothers on the trip to the ceremony. It was a decision Kaden had agonized over, and one Eleana helped him make. In the end, and despite everything, Kaden had wanted to try and get the approval of his father, and Eleana said that she would stand by him no matter what he chose to do. He had also told her that he would like for her to see where he had grown up, and they would likely never get another opportunity.

Kaden emerged from Felix’s room and Eleana stifled a laugh at the sight. Felix wasn’t so polite.

“Holy Mother, you look ridiculous!” Felix burst.

Kaden looked like he was being tortured. The suit they had borrowed – or stolen, depending on your morals – from Azriel was far too short at both the ankles and the wrists. It was like when Eleana had stolen her father’s clothes as a child and worn them around the house, except this was as if Rhys had stolen _hers_.

“I would scathe you for your tone, but you’re right.” Kaden groaned.

Eleana stood up from her position on Felix’s armchair, revealing herself to him as she did so.

“Maybe one of Felix’s will-”

“ _Oh_.” He said involuntarily as he looked at her. His expression was full of awe, and his mouth had opened slightly in shock at the sight of her.

Felix rolled his eyes and hit the bottom of Kaden’s chin so his mouth would close.

“I can see where your thought is going, Laya, but I don’t own anything appropriate for a wedding. I can go raid my father’s closet though and see if there’s anything there.” He suggested. “Or…”

Kaden and Eleana both looked up at his tone. Kaden, who always became suspicious when Felix talked like that, squinted his eyes at the male.

“…I may have something perfect lying around just waiting to be worn. Stay here my friends.” Felix lightly jogged into his guest room, and came out with another suit on a hanger.

It was beautiful. It was the same dark black as Eleana’s dress, matching right down to the silver roses. The roses on the suit snaked up his wrist, ending at his forearm, and the same was on his ankle to the top of his calf. It also had the same detailing on the lapels. Even better, it looked big enough that it might properly fit Kaden.

“Where did you get this?” Her mate asked.

“I had it made as a gift. The tailer still had your measurements from when you got your leathers done. No soldier of mine will look anything less than dashing at a formal event. So? What do you think?”

Eleana was cowed by the kindness in Felix’s actions, and it seemed Kaden was too. His mouth was gaping again, this time more like a fish out of stream.

“How much did this cost you?” He asked.

“I am privileged enough for money to mean nothing to me. The cost doesn’t matter, all that matters is that it matches Eleana’s dress perfectly.” Felix’s tone was joking, but Kaden was nothing but serious.

“I don’t know how to thank you.”

“Go have a good time – that’s thanks enough. Besides, after this is over is when shit starts to get serious.”

A detail that was weighing heavily on Eleana’s mind. After what she had seen Under the Mountain, it was decided that they finally needed to tell the Inner Circle what was going on. They had even gone to Velaris, Kaden included, before Eleana pulled Felix back just as he was about to knock on her home’s door.

If they told them now, there was no freedom for any of them from that moment forward. They would be scrutinized, nit-picked, and as selfish as it was Eleana didn’t want to give up her dance with Kaden. So she convinced the two males to wait until after the wedding to tell the adults.

They had agreed.

Kaden left the room to try on his new suit, and Eleana sat on the arm of the couch.

“Be careful with his family, Laya. I fear the way they’ll torment him.” Felix warned.

“I can handle them. I won’t put up with any nonsense.” She put what she would do lightly. If they tried to hurt him, it would make Amarantha look merciful.

“I hate that he’s going. I would’ve preferred him blowing off his family, even if it was to just make the statement that he no longer belongs to them. But it’s his choice, and I’ll respect it.” Felix sighed.

Eleana knew Felix worried about his friend a great deal more than he was letting on, and smiled at the thought of it. Even if everything went to shit with Kaden and her, she knew he would always have Felix. Once you had Felix, he was hard to shake.

Like a disease.

Kaden came out then, it was much easier getting into a suit when it actually fit you, and he was…

“This is much better. I don’t know how I’ll repay you.” Kaden walked to Felix and the two hugged one another. Of course, they had to make it ‘manly’ by clapping each other’s back too, but it was still cute.

Kaden turned to her and spread his hands out so she could take him in. He did a theatrical swirl for her, bowing at the end. She laughed at his antics, too stunned to do anything else.

The dark colour of the suit only made his skin and hair shine brighter. His eyes were the only thing that matched the deep black.

“I think one improvement can be made.” She quipped.

He raised an eyebrow and grinned. “What might that be?”

She walked to a set of draws and opened the top one. She wasn’t sure if they’d go with their clothes, which is why she hadn’t brought them out sooner, but now she was positive. First, she pulled out the crown that suriel had given her and carefully placed it on her head. Then, she got its twin - the crown made perfectly for her mate.

Kaden looked shocked at seeing his crown in her hands. He was probably wondering when she had taken the time out of her day to rummage through his things to find it.

She carefully walked over to him, and reached up and placed it on his wavy hair. It fit perfectly, just as it had the night she had found it.

“Now we’re perfect.” She whispered to him.

Kaden shook his head, the fit of his crown so perfect it didn’t budge a bit, and kissed her forehead. “You are welcome to wear yours, Eleana, but if I’m seen wearing a crown it would be considered a great insult to my father and yours. I doubt they would let me go if they saw it.” He took it off gently, like it mattered to him.

Eleana could understand his reasoning. There was just a small part of her that wanted to show him off. Not just as the brilliant male he was, but also to mark him as hers.

“Next time.” She shrugged and pulled hers off as well. He grabbed her hands while they were still raised, and tried to guide them back to her head. She resisted though, and his face fell slightly. “They’re a set. I’m not wearing mine if you don’t wear yours.”

“What if there is never an occasion?”

She winked at him. “I’ll sure there will be one day.”

_____

 

The camp Kaden was raised in was very like her own. All camps were, in a way. When they flew there, he did not take her directly to his house. He started with the markets, where he admitted once or twice (likely much more) he stole bread when he was hungry. The old woman who ran the stall would beat his hands with a stick, but he noticed that some days – ones where he looked especially scrawny – she would put some in an awfully inconvenient place to be sold just when he came near, and then would pointedly look away.

Then he took her to the Hot Springs. They didn’t go too close, it was full of bathing Illyrians, but he told her how it was the only thing he missed. “My father would let me use them every time I won a duel or fight. I was a very cleanly child.” He told her.

He said it would be an utter travesty if he let her live another day without trying the famous pastries a local female was known for. They were fluffy and full of custard, and both Eleana and Kaden mutually agreed that Felix’s were better.

He also showed her a large oak tree on the outskirts of the camp that he and his brothers had carved their names into all on their tenth birthdays. His brother’s names had been there for hundreds of years, and Kaden hadn’t expected his name to join them. His present from his father that year was a knife and permission to scrawl his name below theirs.

It was still mid-morning before they started walking to his childhood home, drawing many gazes as they did.

Kaden was the most recognizable Illyrian Eleana had ever known. An incredible warrior, extremely handsome, blonde haired, fae, and the bastard son of the camp’s Lord. She also doubted there was anyone who didn’t realise who she was. She looked far too much like her father to be mistaken for anyone else.

As soon as they could see the two-story house in the distance, Kaden tensed up. Her hand was in his, and he squeezed her hand so tight her skin went white.

“Kaden.” She soothed.

He released his grip on her. “I’m sorry.”

She didn’t take his hand back, but did link her arm through his.

His house looked normal enough. It was big enough to accommodate Kaden’s large family comfortably, and looked lived in and loved rather than desolate like Eleana was expecting. She had to remind herself that no matter how pretty it looked on the outside, the inside was where far the more sinister things happened.

They approached the house. Kaden straightened his back and fidgeted with his suit. He was obviously nervous, it was the first time he had seen them in months after all, and he was putting her on edge too. Before he could open the door to let him in, she stopped him.

“You once told me that your brothers nearly killed you because they saw you talking to a spirit. Is that why you left?” She needed to know before she went in. Needed to know so that she could brace herself.

“Partly. There are many reasons. Foremost being that they knew I was innocent of hurting that child, and they shunned me further anyway.” He gritted his teeth.

“They have no power over you anymore.” She leaned into him.

“They are my family, and try as I might, they are my only family. It’s them or nothing.” He unlooped his arm from hers so that he could instead put it around her waist. “Are you ready?” He asked.

“Are you?”

Turns out neither of them had to be, as the door was opened before they could knock.

Eleana’s gaze was met with that of an older gentleman – obviously more mature. He wore the decorum of a Lord, and carried himself like one. His suit was pristine and pressed, only the best for a nobleman attending a wedding. Illyrians often didn’t bother with such things, but even they couldn’t help dressing up occasionally.

He also looked eerily familiar.

He had the same nose as Kaden.

“And he returns.” The male smirked.

“Father.” Kaden bowed deeply, letting go of Eleana completely.

“It seems you have been busy while away. A member of the Elite? Very impressive.”

It was impressive, incredibly so, and Eleana hated that the way this man said it seemed to make it trivial.

“My cousin only has the best from across the Night Court. You should be honoured to have a son under his leadership.” Eleana scathed.

Kaden’s father’s gaze raked up and down her body. It made her feel not filthy, but like she was being dissected.

“Princess Eleana,” He bowed to her as deeply as Kaden had to him. This man knew it would be a grave mistake to disrespect the daughter of High Lady Feyre and High Lord Rhysand. “It is an honour to have you in our company. Please, come in so I may introduce you to my other sons. They have eagerly awaited your arrival.” He opened the door further and stepped aside to let them in. Kaden stepped back so Eleana could go first, but she grabbed his hand and dragged him along so they would go in together.

She didn’t let go of him when they were in, and let him guide her down the hallway after his father. They ended up in a large longue area, it had to be big for so many children. Waiting in the room were all seven – nearly identical – brothers. They shared a few similar features to Kaden, but the biggest difference was their dark hair and hazel eyes, and they were also shorter than him.

Eleana felt a surge of hatred flood her. They all stood there with cocky expressions on their faces, one even had his hand covering his mouth to hide a laugh. Kaden’s face flamed, and his gaze averted to the ground.

Eleana willed him to look up, to stand his ground, anything.

“It is customary to bow to your betters.” She growled at them.

Their faces turned sombre and they did as she asked.

“Apologies, Heir. We were just excited to see our baby brother return home.” One of them lied. They all bowed and lingered before straightening.

It was hard to tell who was the oldest and who the youngest. They ranged from six centuries old to two – Kaden had told her earlier. If his sister was alive, she would have been the closest in age to him, but still much older.

“These are my sons Alec, Leeam, Rendell, Damion, Jakob, Maxwell, and my eldest Mikael. Welcome to our family home.” Each male nodded as his name was said. “I heard that earlier Kaden gave you a tour of the camp, may I interest you in one of the house? It has been the family home for centuries, and the pride of us. I raised my son’s and daughter here, and although they’ve left me to have families of their own, they all tend to return. Mikael?” He gestured the liar forward. “It will give us a chance to reconnect with Kaden now that he’s home.”

Kaden tensed beside her and moved his body in front of hers. “I can show her.” He spat. It was the first time he’d shown any back bone since they’d arrived at his home, and from the look on his brother’s faces it wasn’t a common occurrence.

“You can’t show her what you haven’t seen,” His brother, Rendell, sneered.

“Stop it.” Their father ordered. Both males backed down at the words, and Kaden detached himself from Eleana only so that he could push her slightly more behind him. “Kaden, why don’t both you and Mikael show our guest the home? Two escorts are better than one. Boys?” He raised an eyebrow and the brothers nodded.

“Bottom to top?” Mikael suggested as he walked over to the pair. Eleana felt Kaden tense again, and his blush spread down from his cheeks to his neck. His brother saw and his smirked returned at the sight. “Please, follow me, Lady Eleana.”

Kaden and Eleana followed Mikael away from the others – their backs met with snickers.

Kaden was looking at the ground again – shame rolling off him in waves.

_And just when I thought I couldn’t hate them more, they had to open their mouths._

Kaden jumped at hearing Eleana’s voice echo in his mind, but wasn’t surprised. She was a daemati after all.

 _We still have a whole day ahead of us._ He thought back at her. _I just hope you still want to come with me after you see this._ He admitted.

Eleana didn’t question him further, she knew that whatever answers she sought likely lied with the place Mikael was taking them. She also knew there was nothing from Kaden’s past that could make her leave. Not now, not in a million years.

The oldest brother walked with his back to them but in a very clear direction. As they winded through the hallways of the house - it was bigger than it looked from the outside - until they stopped at an iron door with a large bolt lock on it.

“In honour of dear Kaden, why don’t we start with his room?” Mikael said with far too much cheer in his voice. He opened the heavy door, which let out a loud _whoosh_. Directly in front of the stairs was a staircase which led down into the basement. “Ladies first.” He moved to let Eleana past.

It was completely dark in the basement, no windows or light at all, and she couldn’t see Kaden’s room until Mikael lit sconces lining the walls.

“Father was generous and gave Kaden all this space to himself, if we wanted-”

“ _Leave us_.” Eleana growled at Mikael. When he didn’t immediately do as she asked, she slammed just enough wind into him to make him trip up the first few steps. “If anyone comes down here before I allow it, they won’t be leaving with all their body parts intact. I suggest you keep guard.” She ordered him.

Mikael scrambled up the steps and closed the door behind him.

The room was completely concrete. No furniture, the lights obviously newly installed. Bolted to the floor were chains, as well as spattered bloodstains. There was a station where wings could be tortured, instruments meant for torture lining the walls almost casually. Ones to break fingers, ones to remove teeth.

Eleana didn’t need to take in any more details about his room. She didn’t need to search every crevice, or ask him what it had been like down here.

Eleana didn’t need to be introduced to Kaden’s room, because she had been dreaming about it for years. This wasn’t just a room - it was _the Room_.  

For years, since she was a child, she had been plagued by night terrors of this place. And the whole time, _the whole time_ , that was just visions she was getting from her mate. Even as younglings, their fates had been so intertwined that she had lived his life alongside him even if he didn’t know it. Not all mates had visions from the other, it was rare beyond comprehension, and implied a far deeper bond than even mates themselves could sometimes understand.

Tears pooled in her eyes, and for the first time the reality of how awful his childhood had been dawned on her. How could he smile? How could he laugh? It was no wonder he didn’t enjoy being touched or why his tent with no walls and constant fresh air was a place he refused to leave.

“Eleana?”

She held back a sob and turned to look at him. His hands were clasped behind his back, and he was tapping his foot nervously.

“I never wanted you to see this.” He breathed.

She shook her head, clearing her muddled mind as she did so. She blinked away her tears, now was not the time to show weakness, and walked until she was so close to him that their chests were touching.

“Close your eyes.” She told him.

“Why?”

“Just do it.”

He closed his eyes, and she leaned further into him.

“I want you to have-” She swallowed back more tears, “I want you to have a least one good memory of this place.” She said no more as she tipped her head up and caught his lips in a kiss.

It was sweet and innocent. The kind of kiss shared between two teenagers who were nervous and falling in love for the first time. There wasn’t heat, but a simmer of warmth that spread throughout both their bodies. Their hands stayed at their sides, and they didn’t take it any further or even kiss again, but it was enough.

______

 

Eleana shouldn’t have been surprised at the number of people waiting around for the ceremony to start. How many times did Kaden have to tell her his family was huge for her to believe him?

They were at a large estate, and had just flown here with Kaden’s father and brothers. All the Illyrians attending were waiting for the ornate, gold doors to open before they could enter the mansion the wedding was held in. It made for a nice chance to chat with people – that is, if anyone here actually had some decency.

“This is so fucking stupid.” Eleana muttered under her breath. Everyone was giving Kaden a wide berth, completely uninterested in talking to a bastard. However, that didn’t stop his brothers from trying to steal her away to show her off to people as their own guest. Nor did it stop people ogling whenever they saw the Heir conversing with a low born. Eleana didn’t understand how they could possibly be surprised that she would spend her time with a male like Kaden. Ignoring the fact Kaden was just a lovely person in general, her whole family was made up of low-borns and half breeds. The only exception was Mor.

“It’ll be different once we’re seated and at the ceremony. I was expecting this sort of reaction from the others.” Kaden seemed calm about the whole thing - he wasn’t mad in the slightest, unlike Eleana.

“I don’t like the way they’re treating you, even if you expected it.” She grumbled.

Their hands were linked and he was running smoothing circles on her palm.

Eleana was still reeling from her discovery about the Room, and was tempted to just winnow them both away as far as she could then and there. It wasn’t that she no longer wanted to be here, but she didn’t know how she would be able to stand being around these people for the next day. Kaden seemed fine, more than fine if she was being honest.

After their kiss, he had held her hand and led them back to his family, a smile on his face the whole time. He hadn’t bowed to his brothers since, or averted his gaze, nor mumbled or refused to speak. He was more the male she was used to, the male that she loved, the one who stood up for the ones he cared about.

“Maybe it was a good idea you didn’t bring Felix instead. I have far more restraint than him, and I expect he would’ve pummelled everyone here by now.” Eleana sighed. She wasn’t joking though. Felix was very protective of the people he loved, and no action Kaden could take would stop him from telling and showing these people exactly what he thought of their prejudices.

“Stop moping,” He flicked her on the ear.

She scowled at him but then laughed, unable to be serious while he was pouting at her.

“Come on,” he continued, “they’re opening the doors.”

Eleana looked over and saw that the golden doors were being opened by two dark-haired Illyrians in suits. Everyone turned to stare, and then made their way in.

The whole mansion was as fancy as the doors, reminiscent of something Eleana thought she might see in the Spring Court. The walls were all painted a brisk white, but the skirting changed in a gradient from gold to blue and back again. There was art adorning the wall, mostly paintings of the seaside, and the carpet was a rich purple.

Originally, the wedding was meant to be held somewhere else and this gargantuan mansion only for the reception and as somewhere for the guests to stay. But the plans had changed last minute, and now the ceremony was to be held here.

There were ushers directing them to assigned seating in a grand hall. There were two sections, each aside an aisle that ran down the middle, and stools for the Illyrians to sit on. The bride had hired children to show people to their seats once they entered the hall, and little Illyrians were all dotting around trying to get everyone seated.

The groom was waiting at the end of the aisle, next to him was Leeam as well as a Priestess. Eleana and Kaden had to wait in a line to be seated, and were nearly at the back. Some of his brothers had gone in, but Maxwell and Jakob were still lingering near them.

There were still whispers and stares, but Eleana distracted herself from them by trying to visualize patterns between Kaden’s scars.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” He asked.

“If I drew a line between the scar on your face and the one on your collar bone, I bet I could make it look like a pony.”

He rolled his eyes at her. “Shall I get some paint and you can test your theory? Here we were thinking you’d inherited none of your mother’s artistic skills.”

“I can draw a wicked smiley face.” She said just as sarcastically as he did.

Before he could reply, an usher bowed to them and led them away. He checked a quick list to see where they were seated, and then led them towards the front of the hall.

“Lady Eleana, your seat is the third from the aisle.” His voice was high and squeaky, a pubescent on the cusp of being a man.

They were in the same row as the rest of Kaden’s family and Eleana walked along with Kaden right behind her.

“Excuse me!” The voice squeaked. “You can’t just sit anywhere!” They had both turned to look at the boy, but it was clear he was talking to Kaden.

“You just told us our seats were here.” Eleana was perplexed.

“Yes, your seat is here. But _he_ has been assigned to stand at the back where the other guests can’t see him.” The boy explained.

“What?” Eleana was shocked.

Kaden just nodded though, and started to step away. Eleana had to snatch at the back of his blazer to stop him.

“I wasn’t the one to d-decide.” The boy stammered. Her fury was palpable, and he likely thought that it was aimed at him.

Kaden turned to her. “I don’t want to leave you with my brothers. Will you be alright?” He hushed.

She shook her head, mouth agape. “No, I will not be alright! I’m not going to sit here without you.”

She felt a hand on her arm. It belonged to Maxwell. “Kaden isn’t privy to sit here, nor is he allowed. You can join him again after the wedding.” He gave her an easy smile, stupidly thinking she could be swayed by his charms. She gave him a sweet smile in return.

Sweet as poison.

“If you don’t get your hand off me you’ll find yourself without a hand.”

He snatched it back immediately, seeing the validity in her threat. She shuffled out of the aisle and away from Kaden’s ghastly brothers. The usher boy followed her, as did her mate, as she stomped back down the aisle. Once again, eyes turned her way.

But this time she wanted them to. She wanted all these people to watch her as she made her decision.

“Where is Kaden to stand?” She asked the panicked usher.

He pointed toward the back corner, where there was barely any space and the view would likely be obstructed by a bunch of decorative lilies sat on a tall table.

Eleana wasted no time in weaving between the seats so that she could stand there instead. With a wave of her hand the lilies moved from the table to the seat that she’d been allocated.  Kaden moved beside her, trying to refrain from laughing at the very flustered usher.

“This isn’t where you’re meant to be!” He said in a panic. “Please, Lady Eleana, come back! The ceremony will only go for an hour - you can come back afterwards I promise.” He was begging her at this point, and she felt bad for him. He was only a child, but her purpose was more important.

He was so jittery that he jumped when Kaden’s father placed his hand on the child’s shoulder. “Run now, child. I’ll deal with this.” He said sternly.

Kaden was behind her again - his hands on her waist. He could easily see over her - he was so bloody tall - and eyed his father. “You have no right to be mad. I’m where I’m supposed to be.”

“You may be, but you had no _right_ to drag the heir along with you. Princess, please return with me to your seat. There is no need to sully yourself here.”

Eleana raised her chin. “I’m exactly where I want to be, but I advise on you returning. From the looks of things, the wedding will start soon, and we don’t want the attention taken away from the bride’s big entrance.”

His mouth was a thin line, and she could see red fanning his cheeks like it often did Kaden. “As you insist.”

He left with his wings bristling with a definite stomp to his steps.

Kaden wrapped his arms more firmly around her, and she leant back into his chest with her hands covering his. His propped his chin on her shoulder and blew into her ear. She wiggled and laughed as it tickled her, but he just tightened his grip. “You’re quite fierce when you want to be. Remind me never to piss you off.”

She lifted her head to look at him. “You’re awfully affectionate today.” She noted.

“What can I say? I’m at a beautiful place, with a beautiful girl who makes me feel strong, and I want to show her that. I can stop if you object.” He pretended to pull his arms away with a loud and fake sigh.

She turned and nestled into him so she could lean her face on his chest. Their clothes blended in perfectly together. They were a matching set, one incomplete without the other. “Would you be offended if I asked how long it will last? I need to know when the moment hits and you decide you don’t want to be touched anymore.” She said it quietly as to deter the leering and haughty guests around them from hearing. They were thoughts she had never dared voice to him before, but he, too, made her feel strong and even a little reckless.

“If I’m remembering correctly, you were the one who tried to seduce me in my childhood home. Of all places! Nearly as scandalous as Felix. I am just trying to be proper.” He teased.

“I’m being serious.”

He brushed his hands up and down her arms and rested his chin on her head. “As am I. My logic is my family is already under the impression that I’m a scoundrel. Nothing I can do at this point will make them see me as less. Actually, the only person this hurts is you-”

“No-”

“Hush, Eleana, let me finish. The only person this will hurt is you. But right now we’re away from home, no one here really knows us, and we have the rare opportunity to be who we want. I know that me acting like this,” he let his hands slip to the small, unclothed skin of her back, “makes you happy. And Cauldron knows that’s all I want for you.”

“I don’t want you to do things like this,” she tilted her head and kissed his jaw, “just because you think I like it. I want you to _want_ this. But…” She leant back. “Even if it’s just for today… I can do that. We can do that.”

“Why don’t we just pretend that you aren’t Eleana the Heir, and I’m not Kaden the Bastard?”

“Should we give ourselves alias’? You can be Codename Blonde Abs.”

He snorted. “Blonde Abs? Wherever did you get that idea?”

She ran her hands down his chest to prove her point. “Maybe it is a bit conspicuous. Maybe Steamy Woodland Nights? Childhood Home Debauchery? Maybe just Couch will do the trick.” Eleana would never get sick of the blush that graced his cheek with any and every innuendo. She said as much to him.

“It is a perfectly normal bodily function.” He defended. “I could make you blush if I wanted. Lucky for you I’m a gentleman.”

Bells started chiming, signalling the entrance of the bride. The hall went quiet, and Eleana shot Kaden the quick thought of - _Saved just in time. There are some things even you can’t do._

Kaden’s cousin looked splendid in her red wedding dress. She had swirls of ceremonial paint covering her body, and her veil only revealed her dark eyes. There was no one in the procession but her, but that was all that was needed to capture the full attention of her audience. It became clear that this wedding was a show of power and wealth, and maybe Kaden and Eleana weren’t the only ones here with something to prove.

Even her wings had been painted, and Eleana idly wondered who she had let do it.

She reached her husband-to-be, and he lifted her veil to reveal a stunningly gorgeous Illyrian. Her lips were full and coloured red, and even from the back of the room Eleana could see the thick lashes framing her face.

 _She’s gorgeous._ She told Kaden.

 _She must be if you’re looking at her like that. Should I be jealous?_ There was a twinkle of laughter to his thought.

_I don’t have to be a painter to appreciate a fine piece of art._

The ceremony was short and sweet, just under an hour long. The two Illyrians exchanged vows and had their wrists tied together in delicate ribbon to symbolize the fragility of life and love and the care that you should give it.

Eleana had her back pressed against Kaden’s chest the whole time, and she slipped her hands up his jacket sleeves to keep her hands warm.

When the ceremony had finished, the guests who were seated threw rice at the bride and groom as they flew from the room with loud cheers and music on their heels. Even Eleana and Kaden were jumping and clapping and spinning to the beat as the guests danced from the hall.

And if Eleana nearly fell into a glass door, nobody mentioned it.

The two betrothed were expected to be consummating their marriage for at least a few hours, so the guests were all given the keys to their respective rooms and were encouraged to rest or socialize before the real party began.

Eleana was right in her assumption that by inviting her, Kaden was given an actual room in the mansion rather than just a hammock in the barn. Well, he wasn’t really. Mikael had tried to get him to go there anyway, claiming that Eleana’s room only had one bed and it wouldn’t be possible to move another one in there. He had been utterly scandalized when Eleana had pinched her room key from his fingers and proclaimed that one bed would be all they needed.

They had brought minimal things, only some clothes to sleep in if they didn’t end up dancing until dawn. The party would continue tomorrow as well into the late afternoon, but that was the deadline they had for the Elite returning to the camp, so they would be home earlier than that.

“My Dark Rose,”

Kaden’s words drew Eleana from where she was watching a butterfly land on the windowsill. He was sitting on the ground, and had arranged some blankets into a bed – much to her protest.

“Your Dark Rose?” She queried.

“If we had codenames, Dark Rose would be yours. Beautiful, but if you hold it the wrong way or get too close, you’ll get pricked by its thorns.”

_____

Eleana was giddy with excitement when it came time to head down to the field behind the house. She had watched servants prepare the party for the past few hours. A dance floor was laid, fires were lit, and alcohol and food were ready for the taking.

She ran eagerly to where everyone awaited, Kaden dutifully, but very happily, following her. As horrid as his immediate family was, she was still excited to meet some new people. Kaden had told her that he would introduce her to the good ones – his attractive cousin, Talysa, included.

The bride and groom had taken longer than expected to become well acquainted with the married life, so the party started only an hour before dusk. It set a nice glow over the guests and flames, and created a warm atmosphere for the musicians.

There were people already swaying to the music, and Eleana tried to rush forward to join them.

“Lady Eleana!”

She groaned as she was called over by one of Kaden’s insufferable family members.

He was an older man with a much younger female latched onto his arm. Eleana didn’t recognize him in the slightest, and glanced at Kaden before proceeding. Kaden frowned but nodded his head and offered his elbow to her. She linked it with hers and together they walked over to the male.

“Ah, Lady Eleana, how marvellous to see you!” He had an awfully overgrown moustache and a line of sweat on his forehead. He bowed when near her, dragging the girl down with him, and a drop of perspiration hit the bottom of her dress.

“Nice to meet your acquaintance.” Eleana returned.

“Eleana, this is my cousin Gerard and his wife Merriment.” Kaden introduced.

Eleana offered them a polite smile.

“It is an absolute honour to see you in attendance, Lady Eleana. May I offer my hand in the first dance of this evening? I have been told I am excellent on my feet.” He gave a beady, and honestly creepy, smile.

Eleana had to restrain from cringing away. “Thank you for the offer, but I’m spoken for the first dance.”

“Who has the honour?” He looked affronted, but in the subtle way that showed he hadn’t meant for his emotions to let slip so easily.

“Kaden, of course.” Eleana thought it was rather obvious, but Gerard still looked shocked.

“I wasn’t aware.” He cleared his throat and awkwardly looked away. “I have, uh, other business to attend to. Feel free to come see me during the night, Lady Eleana, and I will be happy to give you a proper dance.”

Eleana rolled her eyes so hard as he left that it made her dizzy.

She didn’t need to share her thoughts with Kaden as the Illyrians surged around the makeshift dancefloor. This must mean that the bride and groom were ready to make their big entrance and their first dance. They would lead in the dance, and then everyone else would join.

Before they had come down to join the festivities, Kaden had given Eleana another quick rundown of the dances he had been teaching her over the last two weeks. She was confident that by now she knew them by heart, but was still nervous to do it in front of everyone.

There was another grand entrance by the bride, this time her groom leading her along, and together they went to the middle of the floor. The musicians changed their tune to a more elegant one, and along with the beat, Kaden’s cousin and her new husband swirled around the dance floor. After a round, more couples joined in.

“You ready?” Kaden beamed at her.

“As I’ll ever be.” She swallowed.

Kaden linked their hands and then rushed them forward to join in with the throng of dancers. Eleana’s nerves were nearly overwhelming, but with one of Kaden’s hands in hers and the other firmly on her waist, she didn’t even need to close her eyes to calm herself. She let her feet guide her as she remembered the training Kaden gave her specifically so that she’d be able to remember the steps.

They danced well into the night – it seemed once Eleana started she refused to stop. After all, she had a lot of catching up to do when it came to the dance department. Kaden didn’t seem to mind, although he did stop occasionally so that he could get them drinks. In these moments, he would whisk her away to one of the cousin’s that he liked so she could still dance. As it turns out, there were nice people in his family. Truly shocking. Eleana had trouble believing it after all she had seen, but there were some decent ones. She never stayed with them for long though, and would always float back to his side.

She had just finished dancing with a cousin named Aleksander and was wandering back to find Kaden. Alekx was nice enough, very chatty, but the fifteen-year-old didn’t quite hold her attention the way his cousin did. Kaden had seated himself towards the food and had a shot of fire-whiskey in his hand. Eleana could smell it form a mile away, and couldn’t help but smile at the memory of what he had been like the last time he’d been drunk on it.

“You all danced out?” He lifted a glass of champagne at the sight of her approaching and offered it with an outstretched arm.

“Never,” She said cheerily while accepting the drink. As much as she hated to admit it, she was having a lot of fun. Kaden, though, had a little crease between his eyebrows that he only got when he was worried. She lifted her hand and smoothed it out with her thumb. “Are you okay? I thought you would steal me away from Alekx after one dance.”

Kaden grabbed her hand and used it to pull her closer to him. “Somethings going on.” He whispered. “I don’t know what, but my instincts are telling me to grab you and flee.”

Her stomach sank at the words, and she let him fully embrace her. She held onto his shoulders, trying to loosen how incredibly tense they were. “Do you know what?”

“Everybody is acting strange. Gerard talking to you shouldn’t have happened while I was there. My brothers haven’t tried anything with you yet, and I know they wouldn’t be able to resist trying to get someone of your rank into bed. Especially when they know that doing it would hurt me. Like fuck, it wouldn’t even be the first time. Talysa hasn’t spoken to me yet, and under any other circumstance I know she would have by now. Or maybe I’m just being paranoid-”

“I trust your instincts, Kaden. If you think somethings going on than I do too. Is there any way for me to help?” His breathing was heavy and his eyes were twitching. Eleana didn’t know if something terrible was going to happen or not, but she did know that Kaden had been raised to expect it.

“I- No. If something happens then something happens. We came here to dance and have a good time. Why don’t I introduce you to Talysa?” He got up from where he was sitting but didn’t let her go. Eleana was still half-heartedly expecting him to stop at any minute, but she would take it while she could.

“Yes please.” Eleana winked at him suggestively, trying to get him to crack a smile.

Thankfully, it worked, and Kaden snickered at her enthusiasm to meet his bride cousin. “I should do something else first though,” He started walking, pulling her along with him.

“And what might that be?”

“I need to thank you. For coming with me, not just to the wedding but for this morning as well. Even for just being my friend, I could never express how appreciative I truly am-”

“You don’t need to. I know you don’t believe me when I say it, but I appreciate you just as much. I’ll spend my whole life reiterating it if I have to.” She leaned into him and pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth. He looked shyly at the ground, but Eleana didn’t miss the beautiful blush on his cheeks or his smile.

Together, they wove through the Illyrians milling around and made their way to where they could see a line of people waiting to congratulate Talysa and her husband. They joined in, Eleana sipping her champagne and Kaden watching the dancing and occasionally speaking to people.

Dancing with him today had been truly exhilarating. Every swirl and dip had Eleana in ecstasy. She had noted that he had indeed been holding back his skill. There was once dance that in the middle they had to change partners, and it was clear that once he was with someone of his own skill he was phenomenal. It was almost unfair. With surprise, she realised he had been born to dance the streets of Velaris as a fae – just like her. She didn’t know why she didn’t think of it more often – how he was a fae as well. Except he’d never had the opportunity to live like one. Could you imagine how he might thrive living in Velaris? She could have had this feeling her whole life and he… Well, he never would’ve been subjected to the emotional and physical abuse that he did at the hands of his brothers and father.

She started to feel nauseous as she remembered the sight of the Room and all her dreams. Now when Eleana saw his scars, she might be able to piece together how he got them.  The one on his bicep could’ve been a saw, the ones on his chest nicks from knives. She had never seen his ankles, but she knew they would bear marks of shackles.

They were second in line to see Talysa, and Eleana saw her eyes widen in joy at the sight of Kaden. She barely glanced at Eleana, and hurried along the Illyrian she was talking to.

“Kadey!” She squealed. She rushed forward and pulled him into her arms. “How are you?! Oh, I’m so happy to see you! Look how tall you are! I swear you grow an inch a month! Ah!”

Kaden laughed and returned her hug. “It’s lovely to see you, Talysa. And it’s only been half a year since you last saw me! I don’t think it’s possible for me to have grown.”

“Oh poosh.” She straightened her arms but kept her hands on his shoulders so she could inspect him. She scrutinized him from head to toe and nodded happily. “Look at you all dressed up! This is one of the finest suits I’ve ever seen. We tried to get this material for my dress but it was too hard to find. And the detailing! And the colour in your cheeks? You may have had the muscle before Kadey, but I must say you are positively radiating! Now tell me about the Elite!” Her voice was high pitched, completely juxtaposed to her vixen appearance.

“It’s going really well. Felix is amazing and I made the first row-”

“What what what?” Talysa shook Kaden’s torso. “I don’t know what to ask you about first! The fact that you are on a first name basis with the _general’s son_ or that you made the first row!”

Eleana’s ears ached from so many exclamatives in such a high-pitched voice.

“Maybe that’s a conversation for another time. May I introduce you to my close friend Eleana?” Kaden said smoothly.

Talysa finally turned her attention to Eleana. “Oh! Your outfits match! How divine!” She let go of Kaden and embraced Eleana in a similar way. “I adore this dress! Maybe you should change so you don’t show me up!” She lightly pated Eleana’s cheek to show her she was joking. “It’s lovely having you here. I’m glad we could find you a room!” She turned back to Kaden, her full focus once again on him.

Eleana found herself quite liking Talysa. She might babble a lot, and her focus never held long onto one thing, but she did seem genuinely excited to see Kaden, and that was a reaction Eleana had yet to see previously. Her enthusiasm was also contagious. Eleana felt herself start to skip on the spot like Talysa was.

“The barn is nice as well, Kaden. I convinced them to let you stay in the one with the most prized horses,”

“Oh, uh, I’m going to stay in Eleana’s room tonight.”

Her happy demeanour changed instantly. “But there is only one bed.” Oh well, Eleana liked her but everything must come to an end.

“That’s all we need.”

“Kaden, that’s very improper.” Her hands fell to her side and she stepped back. “I insist that you give Lady Eleana her space. The barn in well enough. I had a hammock built, and there’s an owl in there I named Barney-”

“I want Kaden with me,” Eleana interjected.

“Kaden cannot stay with the other guests!” She hissed right back. “When you decide to return to bed you’ll do it where you’ve been allocated. I fought hard to get you an invitation, Kaden, so please respect my wishes. You won’t reside in the mansion. Lady Eleana may, but you cannot.” She was absolutely bristling, and if it wasn’t for the love Eleana knew Kaden had for this female she would’ve beat her head in.

As for Kaden, he slumped slightly. “I didn’t mean to offend you, Talysa-”

“Just go to the barn, okay? Please.” She took a deep breath and stepped back from the two. “You better reserve me a dance.” She said to Kaden. She spun on her heels to talk to other guests behind them and started another conversation.

Eleana was furious, and stomped away from the bride. She could feel the eyes of her husband following her every movement – it was curious that at no point he interrupted their conversation.

“ _Just when I thought there was a good one_ ,” Eleana seethed. For the second time that day, and again because of his family, tears pooled in her eyes.

Kaden caught her wrist and spun her around. He caught her just in time to lean forward and kiss away a tear that escaped.

“I hate this,” she cried. “The way they treat you is disgusting.” She held him to him like he was her lifeline.

“It’s okay-”

“It’s not okay! You deserve better than this. Better than the way they treat you and the way that you were raised. It makes my skin _crawl_.”

“Eleana.” He smiled.

“Why are you smiling?” She snapped.

“Because no matter how they treat me, at the end of the day I have dinner with Felix, and I get to talk to you. I get to lead a unit, and challenge myself. When I go to bed at night I no longer fret about what might happen the next day, but instead prepare conversation topics so that when I approach you I might entice you to stay for as long as possible.” He laughed. “Felix calls me a bastard every single day, in the most affectionate way possible. And every time he uses that word, it has less and less power over me. Sometimes I go back to my tent, and your Aunt Morrigan has left me a casserole for lunch. The other week Quathryn cried because I didn’t have tattoos like Felix, and she wanted to colour them in. Where I grew up is not my home. I can’t choose my family, but I can choose my home, and my home is with you. That’s if you’ll have me.”

“Of course I’ll have you,” She blubbered.

“Then I have no need to worry about what they say or think. There was a time when I cared – more than anything – and there are still things that I can’t give you because some things cannot be changed, but I don’t care right now.” He walked away, his hand over her shoulder while leading them back the way they came. “How about we dance and drink until we forget our names?”

_____

 

Sweat was coating Eleana’s body. She felt fuzzy from the drinks, but luckily, she had Kaden to keep her upright as they danced. She wouldn’t say she was drunk, not by any means, but she would be if she kept going the way she was.

It was past midnight, and after the conversation with Talysa everything had been rather pleasant. She didn’t leave Kaden’s side, and he tucked her in close and often pressed random kisses on her.

“So, Codename Blonde Abs, where to now?” Eleana yawned, but she wasn’t ready to go to bed quite yet.

“I should find Talysa and give her that dance she wanted. You can either watch me in my full dancing glory, or feast yourself on the cake inside. It’s a hard choice, I know.”

“Would you hate me if I sat down for a few minutes?” She asked instead. She could still go all night, but a few moments sitting down would ease some of the pressure on her feet.

“There’s quiches inside. Why don’t you see which is the best flavour and we’ll have a midnight snack?”

“Hmm, I like the way you think.” She elbowed him and then sashayed off while he went to find Talysa.

The hall where the ceremony had been held had been converted into a dining hall, where tomorrow everyone would have breakfast together. As of now, there was even more food spread around for people to enjoy. Most of it had been taken away from outside, mainly due to some very over enthusiastic dancers that had tumbled into one and knocked everything to the ground. Eleana found herself a plate and wondered along, picking out all the foods she wanted. She sat down on her own at the edge of the room on a stool left over and set about the task of choosing the best quiches so she could present them to Kaden.

Or, well, she tried to. Now that Kaden wasn’t with her people decided to come talk to her. She barely got to nibble her quiches between all the people wanting to introduce themselves. She had many men come to talk military strategy with her (and try to get a subtle invitation for an introduction to the High Lady and Lord), and also a lot of woman wanting to discuss the reforms High Lady Feyre had been introducing over the past hundred years. She had many compliments on her dress, but Eleana was most flattered when people said how well she paired with Kaden.

She started to feel more comfortable around these people, where she previously hadn’t without Kaden’s support.

Seeing him act so… bravely? Nonchalant? Strong? It made her feel those things too. Sometimes it shocked how much it was possible to love him, and these were the types of moments that shook her the most. It was like it crept up on her, almost like she forgets, and then remembering him makes her fall in love all over again.

All she wants, more than anything in the world, is for him to feel the same way as she does. To not care about all that family shit, and just _be_ with her. Her was her soul-bonded partner, and Eleana prays for the day when he will realise. That’s why when she had the opportunity to tell him the truth, the moment she almost took, she let it slip it away. Was it selfish for her to want him to come to that conclusion on his own? Probably. Did she deserve selfishness? When it came to him, she wasn’t sure.

There was also the factor that she still didn’t want to take this choice away from him. She knew what he was like, how selfless he was, and if she told him she was his mate he would be with her whether he wanted to or not. She couldn’t inflict that on him.

“Lady Eleana,” a very panicked Talysa pushed past the Illyrian who wanted to discuss international trade and stopped directly in front of her. “I need your help. I think something is wrong!”

Before Eleana could reply, she felt a blood curdling sickness sweep through her that was so bad she keeled forward in pain. She could tell though, as much as it hurt, that this was not her pain.

“Where’s Kaden?” She growled.

Talysa’s eyes widened in surprise, and she turned and waved for Eleana to follow her. Eleana did so immediately, shutting out the pain that Kaden was involuntarily throwing her way.

They sped back towards the yard, and it didn’t take them long to see that something was seriously wrong.

The music had stopped, and there was a hard silence in the air. Everyone had crowded around the dancefloor but left a circle vacant. There was eight people in it, everyone else around was clearly just spectators of their drama.

Seven of those people were Kaden’s brothers, and her mate himself was kneeling between them with his hand clutched to his stomach. Her looked up at she started shoving past his family to get to him, but she stopped when he shook his head and looked at her with pure determination in his eyes.

So instead she looked on with utter mortification as his brothers drew swords and pointed them towards him.

“What the fuck is this?” She asked Talysa, whose face had taken a green sheer.

“I-I had a feeling something like t-this would happen.” She stuttered. “But I thought it would be after the party. That’s why I wanted him in the barn!”

Eleana went to the front of the ring of people surrounding them and watched as the brothers circled around Kaden.  Kaden was no longer kneeling, and stood at his full height in a fighting stance.

_Why were they doing this?_

From what she could tell from the whispers around her, Kaden had been struck down by one of his brothers, which had prompted everyone else to give them some space.

But why? They had done things like this before, but to do it so publically? What happened while she’d been away from him? What couldn’t they do while she’d been with him?

_____

Kaden had woven through the crowd, searching for his cousin so that he could give her the dance that she’d wanted. She’d always loved dancing with him – she was one of the reasons he was so good at it – and he felt like he needed to make it up to her. He was embarrassed about his actions earlier, he never should have agreed to stay with Eleana. But he’d had his reasons, beyond just wanting to make sure his brothers didn’t go anywhere near her, and for that, he was also ashamed.

So even though he could feel his eldest brother stalking him, he made no drama of it and simply continued on. He became more suspicious when Leeam joined in, and considered abandoning his thoughts of Talysa to find Eleana when his cousin’s groom started whispering to the nearby guests. It made Kaden furious. These males may be ones of power, but they were such lowly people.

He didn’t stop walking until Rendell pulled at his sleeve to make him halt, Damion smirking at his side.

“Little brother, haven’t you had quite the time while you’ve been away?” Rendell purred as Damion started circling them.

“If you’ve grown so bored with your life that you feel the need to start a running commentary on mine, I believe you have better things to worry about.” Kaden snapped back.

“ _Oh_.” He’d covered his mouth in mock-shock. “No need to be nasty. You’ve grown so much more _bite_. I feel sorry for that poor girl you’ve swindled. Tell me, Kaden, what lies have you poisoned her with to make Lady Eleana tolerant of your presence?”

There was a low growl in his chest, but he refused to sink to their level. No matter how much _bite_ they claimed him to have, he would not throw the first punch.

“Unlike you, I don’t have to force myself on people.” Kaden had replied simply.

“Force myself? Ha! Maybe while you’re in your barn I’ll find my way up to your Lady’s room and show her what a real Illyrian can do.” Rendell threatened.

“If you think you’re capable of making Lady Eleana do anything that she doesn’t want to do, you are sadly mistaken.” It went against his instincts, but Kaden turned his back on his brother, honestly believing that he wouldn’t be so cowardly as to attack an unarmed male at a wedding while his back was turned.

Next thing Kaden knew, Damion used to hilt of his sword to strike him down. He absorbed the pain, it was nothing new, but he didn’t feel pure anger until all his other brothers surrounded him and Talysa’s husband shooed people away so they could make it into a spectacle.

It was clear they had been planning this for a while.

Maybe he would’ve been submissive like he had so many times in the past – his brothers would likely expect that – but when he saw Eleana frantically trying to get to his side, he knew he had to stand up for himself. His time of being their plaything was over. He was stronger than them, more skilled than them, and all those months ago he may not have been able to beat them all at once, but he was a trained member of the Elite now. They had no idea what they were up against.

So he’d shaken his head at her, and he stood up.

His brothers ohhhed and whistled in amusement.

“You may be taller than us Kaden, but you’re forgetting one key point. You’re a half-breed abomination, who never should’ve existed. Tonight, all shall be righted.” 

All his brother’s had weapons, and his father wasn’t in sight.

A small part of him, the child that had lived in the dark, prayed that his father would see and put a stop to this. Some part of him must love Kaden, right? Why else would he take him when the fae didn’t want him?

He quashed down that part of him, and thought of nothing else but Alec and Maxwell as they lunged at him in perfect synchronisation.

He stepped easily out of their way, swinging around so that he was behind Alec, elbowing him in the head and disorientating him. Jakob took that as a chance to wield his sword, but Kaden angled himself in a way that meant it clanged at a bad angle against Maxwell’s – the idiot had the same idea - making the two brothers reverberate against each other.

Kaden took the chance to kick Alec hard, square in the chest, and then slam his fist down on his forearm, making him forfeit his sword to Kaden. Although he felt content to fight them without a weapon, he felt much more comfortable with the Illyrian steel in his hand.

He smashed the hilt across Alec’s temple, hard enough for him not to be a problem in the near future, but he would live.

Mikael abandoned his sword for two daggers, fury splayed across his face at the sight of the unconscious Alec. Mikael charged, Jakob and Maxwell backing him up. Mikael had close range weapons, whereas the others would have to stay far if they were to hurt him, and Kaden could use their ill-planning against them.

Jakob came from his left, while Mikael came from the front. Rather than stepping back, he came in closer and blocked Mikael’s hooks with his forearms – still managing his grip on Alec’s sword - and then butted his head into Mikael’s nose. It gave way with a satisfying crunch – blood spurting everywhere. With the distraction of Mikael’s pain, he disarmed both of Mikael’s dagger and flung them into the crowd. They were Illyrian, if they couldn’t dodge it that was their problem. He extended his right arm back, the one with the sword, and shot it straight through the flesh of his shoulder like a spear, just beneath the end of his clavicle. Again, it wasn’t a mortal injury, but for now Mikael was out of this race, especially since he’d left the blade in him. Kaden didn’t have to worry about his brother while he was pegged to the ground.

Kaden moved onto Jakob, who had to halt his advance in fear of striking Mikael accidently. He faced him straight on, but could tell from the prickles in his spine and the gleam in Jakob’s eye that one of his brothers was about to pounce from behind him. He predicted where they would try to hit him, and sidestepped at the last minute as Maxwell tried to spear him like he had Mikael. He swung so he was behind Maxwell, and used their momentum so that Maxwell hit Jakob instead, who was too cocky and slow to move. Maxwell seized in guilt at hurting him, giving Kaden the opportunity to knock him out with a king-hit to the temple.

With Alec, Mikael, Jakob and Maxwell now out for the count, Leeam, Rendell and Damion snarled at Kaden.

Kaden could hear the rustling of the crowd around him, and flicked his gaze over to Eleana. Her eyes were filled with pride, and that look alone gave him more strength than a century of training could.

They tried to snake around him, but Kaden positioned himself in a way that made it impossible for them to do so without either treading on the bodies of their brothers or impacting on the crowd they’d gathered to spectate.

“Are you going to tell me why you’re doing this? Why here? Why now? Why make such a show of it?” Kaden asked.

“Because how dare you!” Leeam yelled. Kaden suspected Leeam had a great deal of influence in the set up of this situation. He was Talysa’s husband’s best friend, after all. The two had fought side by side in both the Great Wars together. Firstly, in the war against Amarantha six hundred years ago, and then the way against the King of Hybern last century. “You decided to just waltz out of here like you had the right to do so, and within the first few days of whoring yourself out to another camp you join the Elite?  We have been trying since its creation to make it! Why you? You don’t deserve the extra wages, the prestige, the better missions and training. We’ve called upon Felix countless times to dine with us, and we are refused every time. What did you do? What dark fae magic did you use to wedge yourself in with him?!”  Leeam’s face had gone red and his other brothers were nodding in agreement.

“Do you know what it means to have an in with someone with Archeron blood? The power that comes with it?” Damion growled. “But of course you do. There is no other reason for you to use your _disgusting_ magic otherwise.”

Kaden laughed lightly – his brothers didn’t know the half of what he could do. They had no idea he was a veilsinger, he could count on one hand the amount of people that did, and had no idea what he had learned from Azriel, even if the male was now being elusive.

“What are you snickering about?” Rendell said with fear in his voice. Hopefully this meant that he was finally realising what Kaden was – a worthy adversary.

Kaden thought it comical and sad that all his family would ever see when they saw Felix or Eleana was their blood. The fact that they, too, were fae-Illyrian, didn’t matter when they shared the blood of the famed Archeron sisters.

“I’m sad for you, and I’m sad that it came to this.” Kaden answered.

Leeam threw a knife at Kaden, which he easily deflected with his magic. It was often overshadowed, but Kaden was _Illyrian_. Just because he had an abundance of fae-magic at his disposal didn’t mean he also didn’t have the killing power. He wasn’t trained well enough to use siphons to control it properly, but Felix had shown him enough to make due.

The deflection of his knife made his remaining brothers even more furious, and Kaden welcomed it.

As they had said so many times, he was part of the Elite, and he didn’t have to stand for this.

In a few quick manoeuvres and in only a minute or so, his other three brothers joined the ones on the floor, and he was left standing.

For the first time since they had attacked him, he let himself really look at the audience around him. The overwhelming majority – they all could hear the conversation with his brothers – looked on in pure disbelief. He scanned over the crowd, over half were his direct relatives and all seemed much more concerned about his brother’s conditions than they were about them trying to execute him. He spotted Talysa, who was always so sweet to him, and she was sobbing. Next to her was Eleana – his Dark Rose.

She strode out with her head held high and stopped directly in front of him.

“Eleana…” He whispered.

A lot of the Illyrians around him gasped from his audacity to speak to her without her proper title.

She reached up and smoothed back the hair that had stuck to his face from sweat, and waved her other arm lightly to make the blood coating his suit disappear. She snapped her fingers, and all seven of his brothers regained consciousness. Kaden wasn’t expecting her to do so, but was sure she had a plan. She put a hand on his chest, and he was sure she could feel his heartbeat. Her eyes fluttered closed, and she spread her fingers. “Felix would be impressed.” She finally replied to him. “But I can’t stand by and watch this anymore.” She pushed him with her magic and he skidded back so he was joining the crowd. She then waved her arm over her head, and when Kaden tried to run back to her, he found himself slamming into a wall of solid wind.

With her other hand, she clenched her fist and all his brothers were lifted a foot off the ground simultaneously and lined up.

Then they started screaming.

The noises they were making were horrible, and they were being caused by Eleana. All she had to do was focus on them. Kaden saw with disgust that Mikael and Rendell had both wet themselves, and all’s veins were popping out unnaturally.

Eleana released them from their pain, but she didn’t let them to the ground.

“With the power bestowed upon me by High Lord Rhysand, Death Incarnate, and High Lady Feyre, Light Exultant, and in the name of my kin Felix, son of the General and Beheader, I hereby punish you for the crime of attempted murder on a member of the Elite.” 

Kaden banged on the wind, but he didn’t think she could hear him. Her voice had clearly been amplified so that everyone else could hear her despite the barrier between them.

“You are not injured, all I did was show you the pain that you have inflicted in the past. That was not your punishment.”

She slowly stalked over to Damion, who was furthest to the left. He was too weak to move, but he did meet her eyes.

“He never did anything wrong,” her voice was strained, “and yet you punished him his whole life. Why must you be like this? All of you! You disgust me and you are lucky I don’t request to have your rank stripped.” She delicately held up Damion’s hand. “You let your prejudices blind you, and for that, you will all bear the same punishment.”

Damion let out a wail as Eleana pulverized the bones in his ring and middle fingers. Kaden could see what she was doing. Without those fingers, it would be impossible for them to wield weapons properly – not for a very long time.

She went along the line and did the same to everyone. Next was Rendell, who passed out from the pain, and then Alec, who cried. Maxwell tried to be strong, but even he cracked, and Jakob was very similar. Leeam cursed her name and thrashed, and lastly Mikael prayed to the Mother that she might end Eleana’s heathen life.

When she was done, Eleana let them all drop to the floor, and let go of her shield. Kaden wasn’t the only one who rushed forward, but he was the only one who went to her.

“Why?” He put his arm around her waist and rested his forehead on hers.

“Because now they’ll never touch again.” She rested her hand on his cheek. “They never would’ve stopped, Kaden. I could see it in their minds. Even if tonight they failed, and they didn’t think they would, they would’ve tried again.” She choked. “I’m sorry, but they’ve just hurt you so much-”

He cut her off with a quick kiss to her mouth. It parted in shock, and he took the opportunity to deepen it just that little bit. He didn’t know how else to show her how grateful he was, to make her really see that he meant what he said.

“Thank you,” He said once they parted. “I want to talk more but we need to go.”

He gave her his widest smile and grabbed her by the hand, splitting through the crowd and running as fast as he could. He didn’t know where they were going, but with her laughing at his side it didn’t matter.

_____

 

Eleana didn’t know how long they had run for – crashing through trees and fields alike - but they didn’t slow down until the barn Kaden was meant to stay in came into view.

“How could Talysa have wanted you to stay here if she cared about you so much? It’s so far away from everything else.” Eleana pointed out.

“I don’t think you would understand why people do the awful things they do, even if I explained it to you.” Kaden replied honestly.

The two slowed to a walk, hands still entwined between them.

The sky was cloudless, giving Eleana a lovely view of all the stars above her and the bright moon. She breathed in the air, so different out here in the middle of nowhere than the camp or Velaris. It was uninterrupted by anything else. No rowdy dancers, no fire to filll the air with smoke. It was peaceful.

“I would try.” She told him.

“And I would appreciate it. But you come from world that taught you it was okay to be different, and that you should be loved for whoever you were. When that’s so ingrained in you, it’s hard to comprehend how others can think differently.”  He knew that if someone came looking for them the barn would be the first place they would, but why would they? What Eleana had done was perfectly legal, and how could they pursue justice even if it wasn’t? What could they do against one of the most powerful fae, not just for her age, but in Prythian?

They approached the sliding door and felt a sweep of magic go through them as they did.

“What…?”

“They were wards,” Eleana confirmed. “Meant to keep anyone out who didn’t have fae blood.” It seemed strange, until Eleana thought about it. “This must be why Talysa was so adamant about you being here. When she came to get me, she said she thought something like this might happen.”

Kaden rested his hand on the wood. “That was very kind of her. She didn’t have to do that.” He slid the door open and they were met with the snickers of horses in the barn. Horses were purely leisurely for Illyrians, and many people didn’t bother. In Prythian, most horses were bred to sell to the Mortal Lands as part of a trade scheme Elain created after the war.   

“Kaden, are we still pretending that we aren’t who we are?” She asked him, barely loud enough to hear. “Because I… I struggle. A lot.”

His gaze turned concerned. “With who you are?”

“I,” She stopped and took a deep breath. The way he had been acting today, this new side to him – she couldn’t keep pretending that being friends was enough for her. That it didn’t kill her every time he went on a spiel about how it would never work and he couldn’t give her everything because of who he was. Today he had been the one who decided how much affection they would have with each other, and she lived for the moments where he would hold her hand or kiss her cheek. She also knew, though, that those moments wouldn’t last. “Despite all the things that happened today, I have never been happier than when you danced with me, and when you kissed me, and when you touched me by surprise and it made my spine shiver. It’s hard though, because these moments also hurt me.”

“Eleana,” He looked so taken aback and ashamed that she reached out and held onto his shirt so he couldn’t try to flee.

“They hurt me because I know that everything you feel for me is circumstantial, and that in a matter of minutes you could rip yourself away and I’ll still just be here – waiting for you to realise that-” She choked on her words. No. _No_. She couldn’t. She had to wait. “To realise that we’re perfect, Kaden. That I’m – that I’m in love with you.”

She was right in her prediction that he would try to get away from her, and this time she let him. He took a few steps back, like a force had compelled him to get away from her touch as quickly as he could, and she could hear his breathing getting heavy.

“I didn’t know you felt that way,” He swallowed, and she knew he was lying.

That lie hurt more than anything else that day, and she looked at the floor so he couldn’t see the tears in her eyes from every insecurity of hers hitting her like a killing blow. Every thought she had about not being good enough, about how terrible she must be if even her mate didn’t want her. She may not have told him he was her mate, but she had been clear in the way she felt. She shouldn’t have told him she loved him, but it just came out, and pain ripped through her when he didn’t say it back.

She started shaking, and she bit her lips to try and keep in her emotions. “Do you feel anything for me?” She asked slowly, the words clawing their way out of her.

He came to stand in front of her. He didn’t touch her, just lowered his head the way she was. “You know I do, and you know it doesn’t change anything.”

She shook her head – she didn’t want to argue.

“The wards will keep out anyone who doesn’t have fae blood. You should be perfectly safe here for as long as you need.” She tilted her head and risked a kiss to his temple. “Goodbye, Kaden.” She couldn’t stay with him tonight. Couldn’t pretend that pining after him like this was healthy.

She turned and walked away, and made it all the way to the doors before he spun her around and kissed her with so much wildness that it swept her off her feet. She raised her hands to tangle them in his hair, and he walked them back to she was flush against a wall. He moved his lips to her neck, sucking on the sweet spot between her neck and shoulder.

_Please don’t leave me, please, please, I love you, I love you_

His thoughts snaked their way into hers through the bond he didn’t even know was there. The thoughts sent relief crashing through her.

She pulled his hair so that he would kiss her mouth again, and then let them roam down the broad panes of his chest.

He took her hands and kissed her knuckles and then, much to her surprise, knelt before her – her hands still in his.

“I can’t give you forever,” he whispered against her skin, “but I can give you tonight.”

She bent down. “Come.”

She walked away and he stood up and followed. She navigated her way through the barn to the attic that Talysa had converted to a bedroom, and was met with a twin bed in the centre of the room, and even a small bathroom to the side. It was quaint and sweet – the duvet thick and the pillows piled high. There were lanterns also strung across the ceiling, which Eleana quickly lit. No matter what Taylsa had said earlier that day, she had never intended for Kaden to stay in squalor.

Eleana sat on the bed. Kaden did the same, only an inch from touching her.

“I’ve never sat on a bed before.” He confessed.

Eleana knew this, and a smile came to her face as she thought of all the things he would be doing for the first time on a bed. “Lay down.”

He did as she suggested, and squirmed around. “I’m going to sink into it, I’m too heavy.”

“Just relax – I promise you won’t.”

He kept wiggling around, so she lied down facing him. “So tonight I’m not Eleana, and you’re not Kaden, and maybe we should just show each other how we feel without worrying about everything else.”

He moved so he was also on his side, his head resting on his hand and his gaze searching hers. “I don’t know where to start. It’s different with you, it’s always been different with you.” His lips curled slightly, and Eleana propped herself up on her elbow.

“You can start with helping me take my dress off.” She sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed. The tie for her dress was at the back, and he would need to loosen the bow at the back of the neck as well as undo three buttons at the small of her back.

His breathing hitched as she tilted her head and exposed her neck to him, and the next second he reached out with shaking fingers to unravel the bow. The cloth covering her breasts fell free, and Kaden didn’t wait to see it slip down before he made work on the buttons. She stood up and let the dress fall to the floor, giving Kaden a full view of her behind and wings. She undid the bun on her head, letting her hair fall as well.

She could hear how heavy his breathing had become, and heard the floor creak slightly as he stood. He traced his fingers down her spine, and then up again, grazing slightly against the base of her wings. Just that touch alone was enough to make her moan his name, and her moan was enough for him to grip her shoulder and turn her so they were facing each other.

His eyes glazed over from want as he saw her in her full glory. Her generous breasts, perked nipples, long legs, tan skin. She smoothed her hands under his blazer, making him take it off. While he got it around his wings, she took her time in undoing the buttons of his shirt. Cauldron, she loved his body. She hadn’t been able to get the image of his muscled chest out of her mind since the only other night they had ever been forthcoming with each other.

The sight of his scars, and her newly acquired knowledge of how they came to be, made her lose focus. She regained it though, when she leaned forward and started to trace them with her tongue, having to kneel in the process as she went between the dips and flows of his abdomen.

She could easily see how aroused Kaden was, and not just because of his hands tangled in her hair or the quiver in his legs.

She traced him with her mouth until she came to his hip bone, having hitched down his pants slightly so she could do so.

Her fingers played with his belt, unlatching it and popping the button on his pants so she could pull them off him. He let her, eyes wide and hungry as he watched her.

As tempted as she was to just taste him then, she pushed him so he was back on the bed and she could straddle him. She just wanted to kiss him for a bit – get the taste of his lips memorised before anything else.

He had one arm around her waist, and the other hand was cupping her cheek. He knew what he was doing – his tongue on hers did things to her body she didn’t even know possible. She threw her head back in pure ecstasy when he started kissing down her neck and body again, not stopping until he caught one of her nipples in his mouth. She was pulling on his hair, but couldn’t resist the urge to stretch her arm out and start tracing his wings.

He bit her breast in pleasure, and she felt it straight down to her core.

“I want to taste you,” he moaned into her chest. He lifted her off his lap and onto her back. He hovered over her long enough to kiss her again, and then whisper the most filthy, utterly erotic thing she had ever heard into her ear. Her face went pink at his words. “Told you I could make you blush,” He smirked. He kissed her cheek, laughing to himself at getting that type of reaction from her, and started kissing down her stomach. The calluses on his hands tickled her thighs are he spread her legs apart, and his laughter stopped when he saw how wet she was for him. He kissed the inside of her thigh gently, and then looked to her to make sure he had her approval before he continued. Rather than saying yes, she straightened her leg so that she could graze her foot down the sensitive membrane of her wing. His body shuddered, and he took that as his que to lick a tentative swipe up her centre. All other thoughts except that of his tongue escaped her. Her breath hitched as he did it again, and as he found a steady rhythm her whole body felt it and her back arched. She had to hold on to the headboard behind her, otherwise the pleasure he was giving her would make her thrash. His head was buried in her and his hands wrapped around her thighs as he moaned at her pleasure. He was so good – the best she’d ever had – and she soon found herself screaming his name as she climaxed.

Her whole chest heaved as he came back up to eye level with her and smothered her moans with an opened mouth kiss.  She smiled in delirium, and he brushed the hair back from her face.

“My turn,” She pulled him closer so he was covering her body with his. She didn’t think she would ever get tired of his kisses. They were pure and golden like him, and they made waves go through her body.

She felt his length hit her thigh as they kissed, and squired so he would get off her. “Lay down.” She licked his ear and forced him to sit against the pillows. He was in a position that may suggest a male at ease. His body curved perfectly to accentuate his stomach, one arm behind his head making his bicep bulge, and his legs straight in front of him. But Eleana could feel his nerves, and wouldn’t continue without knowing their source. “Are you okay?” She questioned kindly. She had legs either side of his waist, hips hovering just above his. She had plans before she rode him, but this night would not be through before she did that as well.

His hands rested on her waist. “I’ve never had a woman – a female has never touched me with her mouth. Not, uh, there.”

Eleana raised an eyebrow in disbelief. Not because she didn’t believe him, but because a female had never tried before.

“I was just – they thought it was beneath them to do something like that with a male like me-”

Eleana shut him up with a hard kiss and a grind against him. “We are equal, Kaden. There is nothing I don’t want to give to you.” She moaned. “I want to _worship_ you.”

His eyes fluttered closed at the words. “I want to make you scream my name,” he returned, “so hard that the walls shake and you lose your voice.”

“Hm. I’ll go first.” She smiled. She tried to kiss his cheek, but he turned his head to catch her lips in his.

She kissed down his body the way that he did hers, but skimmed her teeth over him as well, occasionally biting him. She never did it hard enough to break the skin, but from what she saw it doing to him, she just might.

When she got down to his length, she smoothed her hand over it first to get a feel for its size. There was no way that was all fitting in her mouth, she wouldn’t be surprised if it didn’t even fit in her body, but the sight of it made her salivate anyway.

She licked just the tip, and lowered her hand to the base.

“ _Eleana_ ,” Kaden groaned – throwing his head back.

She took him in her mouth and what she could fit pumped with her hand. She took him so far down she chocked, but that just made them both all that more aroused. His member twitched and he trembled when she got him in just the right spot or at just the right angle. She knew he was close to completion – his moans were getting louder and more persistent and his length was straining. She removed her mouth but kept one hand pumping him and the other fondling further below, so she was free to kiss and suck his thighs. The way he was moaning her name made her feel like a goddess, and she didn’t think about it when she sunk her teeth into his thigh – claiming him as hers.

He jerked and came as soon as her teeth pierced his skin, and he moaned in pure euphoria. _“Fuck, Eleana.”_ She kissed the area around the bite, quickly healing the puncture wounds so he didn’t bleed too much. “No, don’t. Don’t heal it.” His cock was already getting hard again - bless Illyrian males – so he pulled her up to face him then flipped them over so he was on top.

She smiled at him widely enough for him to see her canines, and he blushed at the sight. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and he was bracing himself above her. His eyes wandered down her body again, and the next kiss he gave her was slow and passionate, and spoke his feelings to her louder than his thoughts did.

“Please, Kaden.” She murmured deliriously between kisses.

He moved his hips forwards, and she felt it through her whole body when he entered her, and let out a gasp when he filled her.

“Does it hurt?”

“No, no, _please move_. Fuck.” He had no idea how good it felt to have him inside her, how many times she had thought about this exact moment. Eleana mustn’t be very creative at all, because her imagination never could’ve dreamt this.

He started thrusting into her, and she gasped and moaned at every touch. The sensation of him was indescribable, and she wanted him to feel that good too. He was already moaning her name, but the noises he made when she scratched one hand down the centre of his back, right between his wings, leaving marks in their wake, was divinity in its purest form. Her other hand wandered to his wings, and his body jerked with the touch. He buried his head in the crook of her shoulder and his thrusts got faster.

One of his hands moved so that he was also rubbing her sensitive centre, and the feeling was so overwhelming that she climaxed with an explosion of magic around them. Her darkness escaped her and curled around them, and her body lit up like the sun.

He looked down at her in awe as he finished inside of her, her name escaping him in a prayer.

He collapsed down next to her when he was done, and pulled her so she as lying across his chest. Eleana had never been with a male that made her glow like Kaden did, or been with a male that made her feel so many things during sex.

“That was quite wonderful,” his hands wrapped around her, and he tangled their legs together so he could touch as much of her as he possibly could. “You are quite wonderful.”

She hummed into his chest – content to forget about anything else than the feel of his golden skin against her bronze.

“I love it when you glow. I have since that first week when I saw you open the wards at the Mountain.” He admitted to her. “I’m entranced by you, Eleana.”

She cocked her head so she could look him in the eyes. “I want to give you a proposition.”

He raised his eyebrow and smirked. “Propose away.”

“After tonight, we’re Kaden and Eleana again. We have to go home, we have to see each other every day, and we have to be as normal as possible. I can’t forget any of this, and I know you gave me only tonight, and I’m so happy that you did.” She kissed his chest, and moved so that she had her legs on either side of him – bracing herself over him with his hands on her waist and hers on his chest. “But this isn’t it Kaden. I love you, and I’m not going to stop just because you aren’t ready yet. So I give you this. After today, the next time you kiss me, and you _will_ kiss me,” She smirked down at him, “that’s it. That’s you telling me you want to be with me, and I won’t hesitate to give you everything I have. Deal?”

His hands tightened on her. “Say it again.”

“I love you,”

“Again,”

“I love you more than anything.”

She could feel him harden against her, and she grinded back so he was ready at her entrance.

“Deal.”

She made love to him until dawn, claiming him as her own, and marking herself as his - his Dark Rose.   

 

 


	16. Chapter 16

“I’m going to find you!” Felix sang. He knew exactly where his sister was from her giggling. He knew she was behind a tree in front of him, but was just letting her think she was going to win their game of hide-and-seek. It had only been hours since he returned home from his mission to the mortal lands, and all the other members of the Elite had been dismissed. He, however, was awaiting the arrival of a certain bastard and heir and couldn’t make a public appearance until they were with him.

He’d lied to High Lady Feyre and told her that he and Eleana were going to spend some quality time with Quathryn for a few hours, but that would become longer if Eleana didn’t arrive home soon. He was a little worried about how long Laya was taking to come home from the wedding, but there were multiple explanations for it. Firstly, her and Kaden were having such a splendid time that they let time slip away from them. Unlikely, knowing how angsty the two were. The second option was that they had a fight and Eleana is blowing off steam somewhere, but if that had happened Kaden would have come to him by now. Then there was the possibility that things went so horribly with his family that they were all dead and Felix would never see his friends again.

“Come find me! Lis!” Quathryn sang back to him. Her little voice warmed his heart and made him think more realistically. Together, Kaden and Eleana were an unstoppable force – he had to believe that nothing would go wrong. He’d go insane if we worried about them as much as they warranted him to.

Felix stalked quietly around the tree where Quathryn was hiding. He’s brought her to the part of the forest designated for the Elite to train, and since they weren’t, he thought he’d use it to play with his tiny sister.  When he went around, he saw her head peeking around the corner to see where he had gone, and then run off to where he had just been. Her blue dress swished in the Spring wind, and the sequinned shoes Mor had made just for her glittered a bright red. A smile graced his face, and he went back to go catch her.

She wasn’t there though. He stepped back around, and where she should’ve been she wasn’t. He listened for her breathing, her laughs, but couldn’t hear a sound beyond the rustling of the leaves in the breeze and his own heartbeat.

“Quathryn! It’s time to go home!”

She didn’t reply.

He started to panic, and was ready to summon the Elite when he turned and saw Quathryn snuggled in the arms of their father.

“Oh Mother. You scared the hell out of me!” He gave his father a relieved smile and walked over to the pair. Quathryn was babbling away telling Cassian about her wonderful day with Lis, and although Cassian was giving her smiles and asking all the appropriate questions, he gave off a very hostile air. As Felix walked over to them, he crossed a barrier of magic, a ward to conceal where you were unless you wanted someone to know. It smelt like melting metal and tickled his nose.

“I could say the same for you.” Cassian said lowly. Felix noticed that he was wearing full fighting attire. Flying leathers on, siphons glowing, a multitude of weapons strapped to him. He had to hold Quathryn to the side of his chest so that he didn’t accidently hurt her with one.

Felix stopped in his stride and his face fell. “What do you mean?”

“Can you imagine my concern when I get a message from another camp that says Eleana has attacked all the lord’s sons – injuring them to the point where they can no longer fight as soldiers? Can you imagine how my first thought is that these men must have done something to you first to garner this reaction from her – _since she was with you_ – and how I must have panicked when I thought my son was hurt? Especially since I thought he was looking after my baby daughter too?”

“I’m sorry-”

“And then I tell your mother, who was _hysterical_ , and could barely manage to tell Feyre. Rhys was maniacal, but that didn’t last long because he found her on her way back to the house, pretending like she’d been with you the whole time.”

“I’m-”

_“What were you thinking?!”_ He yelled. “After everything that has happened you lie about her whereabouts? Not only that, but you use the team I gave you to do it?” Quathryn shirked back from Cassian and whimpered. Cassian turned to her instantly, apologizing profusely for scaring her and kissing the top of her head. When he spoke next to Felix, his voice was much calmer, and for Felix, that was much worse. “I am so disappointed in you. How can I trust you with the best the Illyrians have to offer when you can’t tell a simple truth?”

Felix stayed silent, his hands behind his back and his gaze to the floor. Hearing his father say he was disappointed in him was the worst thing he could’ve heard, and he knew there were no words that could rectify this.

“I can’t just let this go, not when your decisions impact everyone in the Inner Circle.” He came up to Felix and handed him Quathryn. Felix knew this wasn’t good – his father only did that when he had some particularly bad news. She wrapped her arms around his neck and lied her head on his chest, singing to herself. “I gave you the Elite, and for the foreseeable future, I’m taking them away.”

If Felix hadn’t been holding his sister he would’ve lurched. His father probably expected him to feel sad by this news, or to beg his forgiveness. What he wouldn’t expect was the pure, fiery rage that lit through him.

“No.” He spun on his heels, Quathryn still with him, and walked away from his father. Cassian flew over his head and landed in front of him.

“You can’t just say no, Felix. You can have them back when you prove to me that I can trust you.”

“They won’t listen to you.” Felix put simply.

“Excuse me?”

“You say you gave them to me, and that’s true. You gave me that position. But I _earned_ it, and I built them from the bottom to the one of the most valuable assets the Night Court has. If you take away the Elite, I’ll just make another team under a different name with the same Illyrians. I won’t stand for this trivial punishment, not when you’re not really mad at me. No, you’re just tired because you have a child coming soon and are frustrated because the time Eleana was attacked it was because _you_ didn’t figure out what the creature was. Don’t take your petty _shit_ out on me.”

Quathryn gasped and slapped her hand over Felix’s mouth. “Is a bad word, Lis!” Her scolding brought him back from the angry stares he and his father were giving each other, and did the same for Cassian.

His father let out a loud breath, and came to stand next to Felix. “You’re right. You’ve earned everything you have and more, and I’m proud of you. I’m sorry I didn’t see that sooner, and I’m sorry I’m taking frustrations I have about myself out on you.” He clasped Felix’s shoulder, and Felix let down his sister so he could give his father a proper hug.

They walked out of the forest together to go back to Felix’s house, Quathryn trotting in front of them picking wild flowers.

“Do you know why Eleana was near Cesere?” Cassian asked him.

Felix raised an eyebrow at him. “Have you ever tried to understand all the decisions she makes? She’ll hash it out with Rhys and Feyre, and we’ll hear about it afterwards.”

“I wonder how different the stories will be from what she tells you and what Rhys tell me.”

“It’ll be something along the lines of ‘Cassian,’” Felix put on a deep, growling voice, “’she was in _mortal danger_ and could’ve _died_. I was so _worried_ about her.’ And then she’ll just say,” Felix changed his voice to a high-pitched girly one, “’Oh my _Cauldron_! All he does is _overreact_ nothing was wrong I was _literally_ getting food like _ugh_.’”

Cassian let out a loud laugh.

“I can’t believe you thought you could take the Elite from me.” Felix snickered. It was rather stupid.

“Not my finest moment, I’ll admit. At the time, it felt like a good decision. Now I just think I’ll let Nesta deal with you. That’s far worse than any punishment I could give.

“Remind me again how you found someone to marry you?” Felix joked.

“Mate bonds. Lowering standards for millennia.”

“I don’t think that’s quite how it works.” Felix thought of the bond Eleana and Kaden shared, and there was no way one would be settling for the other. They were so perfect for each other it was sickening.

“Well you can ask your mother yourself. She may or may not be at the house waiting for us to come home.”

Felix’s groan of pain was so loud Quathryn looked at him in concern, and brought him a little bouquet of flowers.

 

_____

Rhys.

Feyre.

Eleana.

The heir sat on a stool in front of her pacing, and furious, parents. They were bickering with each other, trying to decide what her punishment should be. Eleana rolled her eyes. They were so preoccupied with arguing that they hadn’t even noticed when she swiped chocolate from the kitchen, and that she was now contently munching on it. She didn’t care what they said – she didn’t regret a thing. Not to mention that as soon as she told them everything she’d learned about the creatures plaguing Prythian something as menial as this would mean nothing. So, oh no, she’d hurt a few boy’s egos. She could have just killed them.

“Are you even listening, Eleana?!” Feyre turned her fury onto Eleana.

“If I’m being honest? No.”

“ _No_?” Rhys was flabbergasted.

“This is stupid. I didn’t just decide that I was going to hurt some Illyrians because I felt like a laugh. I did it because they deserved it, and it was a just punishment. They’ll heal. In time, but they’ll still heal. Don’t worry, you’ll have them back in your arsenal any year now.” She defended herself.

To think only a few hours ago she’d been asleep, wrapped in Kaden’s arms, waking up only to make love, and now she was here being yelled at. She wondered where he was. When she’d gotten back to camp, she was going to run home to get some new clothes but was caught by her mother. Unfortunately, she was caught _after_ they’d heard the news of what she’d done. They didn’t, however, seem to know what her motivations were or even really care.

Luckily, she was fully dressed when they found her, or this could have been whole new levels of awkward. She could still see the hungry look in Kaden’s eyes when she’d stolen his shirt and refused to give it back - telling him that if he wanted it he would have to come rip it off her. 

“This isn’t about how you hurt those males! We don’t care that you did that! You don’t think we don’t know what kind of people they are? We were worried sick! I’ve never seen Azriel so upset in my life-”

“Az?” Eleana interrupted her mother’s rant. She was expecting everything her mother was saying, but didn’t think her uncle would have anything to do with this.

“When he found out where you have been, and who you had been with, he was sick to his stomach. He would only let Mor in to console him. Not even Rhys!” She snapped.

Eleana was confused. She didn’t understand why Azriel would have that kind of reaction. Sure, he worried about her a lot, but never to this extent. “Why?” She wanted clarification. She hated that she had made him feel that way, even if she didn’t understand why he may.

“Do you even know who those Illyrians were?” Rhys asked her. “I was the one who had to tell Az where you were, when we thought you were safe with Felix and the Elite. He was physically ill, worse than I’ve ever seen him. I had to help him sit down after he nearly fainted. And that was before he threw up.”

“Why would he care who I was with?”

“Because you were with his nephews.” Rhys hurled.

“I told you, Felix wasn’t there!” She growled back.

“I wasn’t talking about Felix! Those males you hurt are the sons of his brother.  The one who did those awful things to him as a child. From the reputation they’ve garnered for themselves they seem to be just as ruthless. Why do you keep putting yourself in situations like this? Are you rebelling? Is there something wrong that you’re not telling us?”

Eleana couldn’t answer him. Of all the reasons for Azriel to be upset, all the things that he could’ve said, not this. Never this. Because if the males she attacked were Azriel’s nephews, then that would mean Kaden was too.

And it would mean Kaden still had family.

Eleana leaned over and buried her face in her hands – tears of relief cascading down her cheeks.

Both her parents rushed forward, never too angry to not want to help their child when she was upset. They both put their arms around her, and Rhys smoothed her hair and shushed her.

“Please don’t cry, butterfly. This is just out of line, and we worry about you so much already without you lying to us.”

The words her father was saying were barely registering with her. Her cried turned into quick gasps, and she needed to calm the hell down. She was just so happy.

“I need to talk to Az.” She sobbed.

Feyre and Rhys looked at each other – Rhys nodding his head and helping Eleana stand. “I think that would be a good idea. He’s beside himself, and I think seeing you would make him feel better.”

She hugged both her parents, but they stopped her when she tried to leave. “This isn’t over, Laya.” Her mother told her. “There will be repercussions for your actions, and you know we hate punishing you but this is something that has to be done.”

“What are you going to do?” She asked them.

“We’ll tell you after you see Az. Come home soon.” Feyre’s words put an unsettled feeling in her stomach, but she would push that aside for later. Right now, she needed to speak to her uncle.

_____

 

When Felix arrived home, he was met with the sight of his heavily pregnant mother. When she saw him, her nostrils flared in anger and she waddled up to him and his father. “Where have you three been? I’ve been waiting for at least an hour!”

Felix tried not laugh at her appearance. She didn’t fit into any of her clothes anymore, so she had taken to stealing his fathers at any possible moment. Right now, she was wearing a green shirt that was so big on her it could have been a dress, and a pair of her own white, knit leggings. She was also wearing fluffy slippers that matched a pair that Quathryn owned, and her hair was in utter disarray. Her cheeks were also tear-stained, and Felix just wanted to give her a hug.

She walked up and bent down as far as she could so she could kiss Quathryn. Quathryn, having gotten used to this by now, stood on the tips of her toes and puckered her lips to meet Nesta. “Look at my little girl. So much better behaved than the males in our house.” Nesta praised her.

When she walked to Felix, he held out his hands to hug her but she hit him on the head instead. “You pull shit like that again and I will kill you myself. How dare you put us all in that kind of stress. Did you father tell you about the Elite?”

Felix cringed and nodded. “We mutually decided that it was a bad idea, and that taking away the Elite would be pointless.”

Nesta raised a single eyebrow, and turned towards Cassian. She went to smack him in the head too, but he caught her hand and kissed her palm. “I missed you.”

“Don’t avoid the topic at hand. And you were only gone for an hour.”

Cassian ignored what she said so he could kiss her baby bump, both hands smoothing over the swollen belly lovingly. “See? Only an hour. I still missed you though.”

“You’re insufferable.”

Felix didn’t think she actually believed his father was insufferable. Felix didn’t usually lean down and kiss the people he thought that of, and then push his back against their chest so they can wrap their arms around him in an embrace. But maybe that was one of the ways Felix differed from his mother.

Felix bent down and picked up Quathryn, taking her to the kitchen so she could pick out any snack she wanted. She was deliberating between blueberry scones and apricot tarts when Felix heard his front door bang open and a sword being drawn.

He gave Quathryn both sweets and tucked her into one of his empty cupboards, and drew a dagger he’d had strapped at his thigh. He left the kitchen to see what was happening, only to roll his eyes at the scene in front of him. Kaden had backed himself against a wall with his hands raised in surrender, and his father had his sword at Kaden’s heart.

“How did you get past the wards on this house? If you think I’ll believe Felix let you, you’re wrong. He only lets family have free pass-”

“Lower your sword.” Felix scoffed. “It’s just Kaden, and he can come and go as he pleases.” His father turned to him and did as Felix asked. “Kaden, would you mind getting my sister? I put her in the cupboard when I heard the commotion.”

Kaden nodded and left the family be. Nesta was behind the couch – watching the scene unfold with curiosity.

“You can’t go around stabbing people that come into my house.” Felix chastised.

“He just burst in here!”

“Good. That means we’re making progress, and I’m sick of him always knocking.”

Kaden came back out with Quathryn – still nibbling away at her scone and tart. “I’m sorry for the intrusion Lady Nesta and General Cassian. I’ll be on my way now.” He handed Quathryn to Felix and she pouted at him in return.

“Oh no you don’t.” Felix grabbed Kaden by the back of the shirt and made him stay where he was. Quathryn must have agreed with his decision, because she too reached out with her little hand and grabbed Kaden’s shirt. “Father, mother, this is Kaden. He’s in the first row, and he’s also my best friend. He’s twenty years old and enjoys long walks on the beach and sunsets. Now that we’re all well acquainted, why don’t we all have dinner?”

Nesta glanced an appreciate eye up and down Kaden, and Cassian scowled at her. She shrugged her shoulders and came around to them to properly introduce herself.

______

 

When Eleana arrived at Azriel and Mor’s, night was just beginning to fall. Their house made of an ocean of greenery reflected the yellow and pinks of the sky and sun – making the whole place gleam like a rare gem.

She was so excited to tell Azriel what she had discovered, and she genuinely thought that he would be too. He liked Kaden a lot, most people did, and now they could act like a proper family.

She just wanted them all to be happy – Kaden especially. The night she had just spent with him…

She felt a giddy rush go through her. She would get to spend her whole life like that once Kaden was ready to be with her, and if he had a family member who was encouraging and helped him deal with his childhood, he would be even closer to taking that step. Azriel had suffered a similar fate to Kaden at the hands of their family, and had since come to peace with it. It took him hundreds of years, but that was because no one really understood what he went through and how to help him. Az would know _exactly_ how to help Kaden.

A whole life of him running his hand down her back just to remind her he was still there. A whole life of random kisses to her neck. A whole life of staying up hours into the night talking, him holding her close, skin to skin.

She went to the door, far too impatient to knock, and burst in. She’s kind of making a habit of it, but situations like this called for it.

“ _What_?” She heard Mor snap. Her aunt came rushing down the stairs, a furious look on her face, but stopped short when she saw Eleana. “Eleana, it’s you.” She sighed in relief. Her aunt walked up to her and hugged her.

“I need to speak to Az. I found out something huge, Mor. You’ll never believe it.” Eleana smiled.

Mor nodded and pulled her up the stairs. “I’m so glad you’re here, Eleana. He’s been so worried. I thought you were Cassian – I’ve had to tell him to stay away. Az was just inconsolable and needed some space, but I think you’re the perfect person to make him feel better.”

Mor took Eleana to her study, and Eleana could see shadows dancing under the door. Mor opened the door, and Azriel stood from his position behind the desk to meet her. When his eyes met him Eleana’s, his body slumped in relief and he grabbed her to him in a tight hug.

“Laya, you’re safe.” He breathed.

“Of course I am. You don’t have to worry about me like this.” She hugged him back, and could feel him shaking slightly. “I need to tell you something though – such wonderful news!” She pulled herself back and gestured for Az and Mor to both sit. When they did, she clasped her hands in front of her like she was about to give a presentation.

“Well, Laya?” Mor prodded.

“As you both know, I am in serious trouble with my parents because I lied and told them I was with Felix, when really, I ditched and went to a wedding near Cesere, with some questionable people.”

Azriel made a choking sound in his throat. “I am aware.” He groaned.

“Uncle Az, I had no idea the way I had upset you until my father told me, and I felt awful. But I also didn’t understand – not until I was told that the males I punished were your ne-”

“Don’t call them that, Laya. I have no attachment to that part of my family.”

She looked at him sympathetically. “I know, but maybe _you_ don’t.” Mor and Azriel gave each other a strange look, and Eleana continued. “The only reason I was at the wedding is because Kaden invited me. The reason I attacked those males, was because they had hurt him first. And it’s not the first time either,” Although the dire topic, Eleana had a wide smile on her face. “Because they are his brothers. The ones who hurt him so badly as a child. And if they’re his brothers, and those males are the sons of _your_ brother, that means…” Eleana couldn’t finish her sentence – leaving them to put the pieces together themselves. She clapped her hands and shimmied her shoulders in pure excitement.

She expected there to be shock on their faces, a little surprise, but they both just seemed grim.

“This is great!” Eleana tried to hype them. “Now both you and Kaden have more than just the family you’ve made for yourselves! There’s nothing wrong with that, but now he won’t feel so alone. He doesn’t get it like you do Az. He needs you.”

Az and Mor looked at each other, and both stayed silent.

“Aren’t you happy?” She asked them. She knew they were both very good at concealing their emotions, but she didn’t think a time like this would make them choose to do so. She was expecting happy hugs before flying to the camp together, a heartfelt confession to Kaden, not to be on the receiving end of their poker faces.

Then she realised, as Mor and Az looked at each other again, it’s not that they were hiding their surprise, it’s that they didn’t feel any.

She looked away from them, not knowing what to think. “You already knew.”

“We did.” They told the truth.

“For how long?”

“I knew as soon as I saw him for the first time, on the day you were taken.” Az confessed.

Eleana stumbled back slightly, having to right herself by sitting down on a stool in the corner.

“That was months ago.” Her voice broke on the last word, and she pinched the bridge of her nose, trying not to cry. “Why?”

Azriel didn’t move, but Mor had so she could place a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“The truth is, Eleana, that I don’t have to explain the decisions I make to you or anyone else. I hope you respect my choice and don’t tell-”

“Fuck you.” She growled at him.

“ _Eleana_!” Mor barked.

“How can you condone this?! Kaden is all alone, all he’s ever been is alone! I don’t need to ask you if you can relate in any way, or if you know what that feels like, because we all know you do! Both of you know what it’s like to be ostracized from the people who are meant to love you _unconditionally_ , and yet you don’t tell him? Why? Please, explain this to me or I will just think the worst. Maybe if he was an ass, then I would understand. But he’s kind, and lovely, and pure, and he deserves more than just what Felix and I can give him.”

All Eleana could think about was the previous night, when she’d been in his arms and he’d told her exactly what had happened to him as a child. He was six when it became really bad, when the things his brothers did started to leave scars. She could still feel his tears on her skin as he cried into her neck, and the feel of her lips on his as she showed him how much he meant to her.

Azriel looked straight through her, hands clenched and jaw set. His face had paled and Mor was trying to get him to look at her, whispering to him so Eleana couldn’t hear.

“Are you going to answer me?”

Azriel shook his head.

“I tell you everything,” she murmured. “And I know that it’s different, because I’m just a child in your eyes, and you’re the adult. I just thought that I had earned at least enough respect to get honesty from you.”

“Eleana, I think maybe you should go home.” Mor smoothed back Azriel’s hair – the male still staring vacantly ahead. “There are some things you’re too young to understand.”

Eleana stood, and tried to brush out invisible wrinkles form her clothes. She walked to the open door, and stepped from the room. Just as she was about to close it, she spoke once again. “I thought you cared about us more than that. You haven’t just been lying to Kaden, but also to Felix and I.” Her hand shook as she put it on the handle, and she couldn’t bear looking at them. She opened her mouth to say something else, something that would hurt him as much as he’d hurt her, but she closed it with resignation. There was no point and she still loved him, and Mor was right.

She didn’t understand.

_____

 

Eleana winnowed to the camp and made her way to Kaden’s tent. He wasn’t there, so the next best assumption was Felix’s.

As she approached his house, she could tell from the loud sounds of laughter within that Kaden was there. She could see Cassian, Nesta, and Quathryn on the balcony bidding their goodbyes to Felix and Kaden, and Eleana’s first thought was at _least one of my uncles want him._

She saw Cas put him an arm around Nesta, the other holding Quathryn firmly on his hip as he winnowed them away. Felix and Kaden went back inside, and Eleana waited a few minutes before entering herself. She could tell that Kaden was buoyant, and she wanted that to last as long as possible. She also knew, though, that she needed to tell Kaden what she had learnt, and it would be better if Felix was there to help support him.

She released a shaky breath, and walked to the front door, gingerly knocking on it until a radiant Felix opened it.

“Eleana!” He pulled her inside. “I’m surprised to see you. I thought you’d have been banished to the ends of Prythian to live in solitary confinement until the age of fifty.”

“What would you do if I told you my mother and father had no idea I was here?”

“I would approve, and deny being involved for the rest of my living years.” He picked up a tart and offered it to her, but she politely declined.

“Where’s Kaden?”

“He’s in the bathroom washing up. Quathryn felt the need to decorate him with icing, and then my mother very inappropriately joined in. Missing him already?” Felix teased.

“I found something out, Felix, and I have to tell him but he’ll need you there to support him.”

Felix turned solemn, and nodded. “Anything you need.”

They talked for a bit – Felix told Eleana this ludicrous story about how Cassian nearly took away the Elite, and Eleana told him about how her parents were furious to the point where they barely even noticed what she was doing.

Eleana was mid-sentence when Kaden came out of the bathroom. Shirtless. She had to refrain herself from pouncing on him. His face broke in a smile when he saw her, and he instantly walked over to embrace her. He held her so tight he lifted her from the ground, and her arms were just as firm around him. He touched their foreheads together, and she closed her eyes – content to stay like this.

“Hello,” He lowered her to the ground, but didn’t make any distance between them.

“Hello,” She moved her head so it could rest on his shoulder. She was tired, and she was scared about how he would react to what she was about to tell him. “I have to tell you something.”

He leaned his head on hers. “Yes?”

She finally moved away, but held his hands so she could make him sit down. She led him to the couch, and when he sat - a bemused look on his face - she knelt in front of him and pressed her lips to his knuckles. “Do you remember what I told you yesterday?” _That she loved him._

“Every word.”

“Then before I tell you this I need you to remember that, and you need to remember that Felix is here as well.” Speaking of, he sat down next to his friend, just as confused but ready to be a helping hand.

“You’re worrying me.” Kaden told her.

She kissed his hands again, and then told her story. “My parents were furious when they learned I went to the wedding – don’t interrupt, okay? Just let me tell it. The reason they were so mad was less because of what I’d done by lying to them, and more about the Illyrians I was with. Azriel,” a lump formed in her throat at the name. “Azriel was beside himself, and I didn’t know why. My parents then explained to me that it was because the people I was with were his estranged family. That the males I attacked-” she squeezed his hands again, and then moved one of her own to stroke his cheek, “that the males I attacked were the sons of his brother. Azriel doesn’t like to call them his nephews, but that’s technically what they are.”

Kaden looked at Felix, her cousin looking right back at his with the same expression of shock. In unison, they let out of whoop of joy – standing and jumping up and down together.

“Holy shit!” Felix shouted.

“Do you think Cas can give me permission to go to Velaris? We must tell him! _We need to tell Az right now!_ ” The two males jumped into a hug, spinning each other around like children.

Eleana’s heart broke with their elation, and she remained kneeling on the floor – tears stinging in her eyes once more.

“You’re Az’s nephew! You’re on a nick-name basis with my father! Both are weird and yet I am very happy!” Felix cheered.

“We’re just like brothers!” Kaden and Felix were wrapped around each other, swaying back and forth.

“Let’s go right now. Fuck getting permission, Az will get us off the hook. Eleana? You coming?”

They both looked at her, finally, and let go of each other and their joy when they saw her despair.

“Eleana?” Kaden came to his knees beside her, putting his thumb to her lips when he saw them trembling.

“You can’t go to Velaris.” Her voice broke.

“Why?” Felix asked. He pulled them both up, and made them sit on the couch rather than kneeling. Kaden and Eleana were faced towards each other, knees touching, and Felix stood in front of them.

“Because Azriel already knows. He has for months.” The tears that had been itching at her eyes since she found out fell when she saw Kaden’s face change. It went from pure exhilaration, to stony in a second. She’d seen that expression before, he was trying not to cry.

“Oh. I see.”

“I’m so sorry.” She whispered.

Felix’s mouth hung open, too stunned to say anything.

“Don’t be sorry, Eleana. It is what it is.” He cleared his throat and turned so he could poke Felix in the stomach. “Get that look off your face – I’m supposed to be the one who can’t keep his emotions in check.” His joke fell flat, and his voice wavered with every word.

“I don’t know why.” She offered to him. What else could she say? It was the complete truth – she didn’t know why Azriel acted this way, why he had deceived them for so long.

“Please don’t waste your tears on me.” He leaned forward and kissed away the tears on her cheeks.

“It’s okay to be upset by this.” Felix said in a low voice with a deep frown on his face.

“No, please. Neither of you need to be troubled by this.” His words were false, and he knew it. Eleana did too, and that’s why she crawled into his lap. They weren’t together, but she’ll be damned if she let him deal with this on his own.

“It isn’t how it’s supposed to be. I want to be troubled, I want to worry.”

“Please, _please_ , don’t. I-I know I can’t explain it to you, but _this_ isn’t something I’m u-unaccustomed to. No one in my family has ever – you two are the first to ever want me.” His face finally crumpled, and Eleana felt a sob tear through him. “He knows me,” Kaden turned to Felix, the latter with a hand over his face trying to conceal his own tears. “H-he knows me and he still – he still – _Cauldron_ , he knows everything about me and he still doesn’t-” Kaden gritted his teeth as he cried, his emotion so thick that he could no longer form a coherent sentence.

His hands moved to her waist, and he took her in his arms as firmly as he could, every possible inch that could be touching was. He was quivering, and so very vulnerable, and she didn’t know what to do.

He looked up at her and Felix – all three’s faces stained from tears. “I thought he – I thought I could look up to him, and when he distanced himself from me I thought it was because I came on too strong, and I-I scared him away. I thought, _so stupidly_ , that this is a male I can impress, who might look at me one day and be proud. Do you think that when he looks at me, he sees my father? That when he looks at the scars on his hands, he thinks of me? And Lady Morrigan… I thought she respected me as a solider, and she didn’t look down on me because of my,” Kaden looked around, the glassy sheen he got when he used his magic coating his eyes, “because of my affliction.”

“You can’t think like that, Kaden. Whatever his reasoning here-”

“I’m so embarrassed, Felix.” Kaden interrupted his friend. “Everything I thought was wrong.” He sniffled loudly and rubbed a hand over his eyes. “I need to go back to my tent - sleep this off.”

“Not a chance.” Felix asserted. “I don’t care if you sleep in your room, or my room, or the bloody couch, but you are staying here with me tonight.”

The two stared at each other, and eventually Kaden nodded in agreement. “Will you stay too?” He asked Eleana.

“Mother knows I wish I could, but my parents will look everywhere for me once they realise I’m not in Velaris-”

“You can stay.” Felix moved away from them, trying to subtlety wipe his eyes. “I’ll ward the house, and I’ve had to hide things enough times that it’s honestly one of my best skills. They’ll never know you’re here, and if they question if someone else if residing here, I’ll just get my mother to tell them about my dear friend Kaden. Quathryn will vouch too.” He tried to lighten the tone.

Without another word, the three, very exhausted, fae-Illyrians retired to their rooms. Felix took his, and Kaden and Eleana slept in the room Felix had always kept waiting for Kaden. All three were vulnerable on their own, strong enough to deal with this together.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't usually put author's notes on ACOHAD, but I just wanted to apologize for the wait! It's a tedious story, so check out my tumblr if you want to know why it takes me so long to update, but if not JUST KNOW I'M SORRY OKAY. I appreciate the kind comments you leave me, and I wish I could give you all more.

Kaden awoke to his best friend nudging him in the shoulder – an incessant finger prodding at him. Kaden waved him away and wiped at his eyes. It was still dark out, and Eleana was still asleep in his arms. Felix looked at him pointedly, and then cocked his head and left. Kaden didn’t know what he wanted, but he supposed he should find out.

Felix was sitting in the railing surrounding his balcony, absentmindedly swinging his legs back and forth, hunched over and thumbs twiddling. Kaden kicked his legs up over as well, and sat down next to him. He was cold now that he didn’t have Eleana to hold him, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t want to just crawl back to her now and never leave.

“What is it?” He asked.

“You never got to tell me what happened at the wedding. From the reaction of my family, I’m taking it wasn’t the grandest of times. _But_ , you and Eleana also seem to be rather chummy – and here I was thinking you might kill each other.” Felix was nursing a beer in one hand and took a deep swig.

“The whole thing was a ruse so that they could get me alone and kill me. Honestly? I’m disappointed in their ingenuity. They didn’t stand a chance.”

“Good to hear. And Eleana?” Felix reached down and picked up another drink from beside him – this one full. He handed it to Kaden, who sloshed it around a little bit before taking a drink himself.

“We had sex. A lot of sex. We’re not together and we aren’t going to be, but for one night it was nice. Fantastic. Everything.”

Felix coughed and choked on his drink. “Well,” He snorted, “I appreciate your candidness. May I ask why?”

“Because she told me she loved me.” Kaden bowed his head.

“Is that the reason you two were finally… intimate? Yeah, I’ll say intimate. Or the reason you can’t be together?”

“Felix… nothing has changed. If anything, it’s gotten worse. Right now, you’re both too mad at Azriel to really consider what this means-”

“Don’t say th-”

“Don’t interrupt me, Felix. Azriel wants nothing to do with me, and he means the world to you and Eleana. I could never get between that. If I was with her, there would always be that undertone. Not to mention all the other complications that already existed.” Kaden sighed heavily. “And… there’s something else.”

“Something else? What other bullshit could you possibly tell me?” Felix smiled sarcastically at him.

“When we were together, there was this moment, and I don’t know what it means, but it was like – it was like our souls joined into one, and I could feel me through her and,” Kaden shook his head. “It sounds so stupid when I say it aloud. She had been in my head all day, and I think my own magic clung to hers. Is that possible?”

Felix tsked beside him. “Maybe you should ask her. I’m no daemati, after all.”

“Yes, but you are meant to be helpful.” Kaden shoved him slightly, making Felix laugh and fling his now empty bottle into his front yard. He had been drinking long before he summoned Kaden, as the empty bottle joined at least five others among his plants. “It doesn’t matter anyway. As much as I want to be near her, I need to push her away.”

“Now who sounds like the stupid one.” Felix rolled his eyes. “If you keep pushing her away, there’s going to be a day when she doesn’t come back. I’ve told you this before, but you need to stop playing with her. When she told you that she loved you, did you say it back?”

“Of course I didn’t.”

“But you still fucked her anyway, and let her think that she had a chance.”

“It wasn’t like that,” Kaden defended. “She knew it was only for the night, and that’s what she wanted. Do you really think I don’t want to be with her? It’s the only bloody thing I want. But I also want what is best for her, and that sure as hell isn’t me – it never will be. So, get off your over-inflated ego. I hate feeling this way about her. I _hate_ it.”

Felix took a deep breath and rested his hand on Kaden’s head. It was a testament to how much Felix meant to him that he didn’t shake it off. “You’re right. Not about up not being enough for her, but how I have no right to comment when I don’t know the facts. Just do me one favour, okay? And we’ll never have this conversation again.”

“What favour is that?” Kaden calmed down, and rested a hand of his own on Felix’s black hair.

“Never say that you hate how you feel about her. Don’t even think it. If she heard she would be devastated.”

______

 

Eleana woke up only minutes after Kaden did – feeling the absence of his body next to hers instantly. She didn’t bother him and Felix though, rather started getting ready for the tedious day ahead of them. The wedding was officially over, and Eleana had popped the happy bubble she’d been in for the past two days. She had work to do, and she had been selfish for long enough.

She retrieved all the knowledge they’d gathered about the creatures from Felix’s study, and lied it all out on his oak desk. Usually, she would have taken it out to the longue and spread it over the table in there, but then she would have disturbed Felix and Kaden, and she quite liked the sounds of them laughing at each other and drinking.

The study was nice enough. The carpet was achingly soft beneath her sore feet, not nearly as worn as the rest of the house. Felix had let Quathryn finger paint the walls, but because of her tiny stature the sporadic dots of colour only went as high as Eleana’s thighs. That didn’t stop there being paint on the roof as well though – clearly from Felix holding his sister up so she could spread the dots there too. Eleana knew Felix purposefully painted the walls of the bedrooms and study white when the rest of his home was an explosion of colour so that whoever stayed in them could leave their own personal mark.

She reread all the information they had, and tried to organise it in a way her parents would appreciate. She knew she had one hell of a punishment waiting for her when she got home, and she would at least explain everything to them before she was banished to solitude. That might be an exaggeration, but her sneaking off after she saw Az and Mor would not help any defence she could muster.

By the time she was done, light had started to pour through the windows, and she could still hear Kaden and Felix chattering away on the veranda. She couldn’t hear anything but indistinguishable voices and snickering, which strangely disappeared for an hour or so, and she knew the exact moment they decided to retire back into the house from Kaden’s sudden shout of her name.

“I’m in here!” She called to him.

She was standing, observing the work she had put together. It was good, and hopefully convincing. It can’t be like last time – when Felix was attacked and no one believed them. Eleana shook her head. It was hard to comprehend how long ago that had been.

The two males came into the room, Felix peering over her shoulder to observe what she had done. “How long have you been awake?”

“As long as you have. I suggest we go to Velaris within the hour, but first you need to wash the smell of beer off you and sober up a little bit. If all goes to plan, by the afternoon there will be an open investigation into this, and it won’t just be us anymore.” She stretched her taut body and rolled her shoulders. She had been hunching over the desk for a while now, and she was in desperate need of a nap. “I’m going to lie down, come get me when you’re ready to go.”

Felix nodded, and left presumably to go wash. That left Kaden and Eleana alone, two people who hadn’t talked much since she’d admitted to him that she loved him.

“Want to join me?” She raised an eyebrow and smirked, but it wasn’t returned.

“You set the rules yourself, Eleana. If I kiss you, it means I want to be with you. If I go to bed with you again, I’ll do it anyway.” He looked at the ground, scuffing his foot along the carpet in unease. His body swayed back and forth, and Eleana wondered how much he and Felix had drunk.

Eleana reached out a hand to him, but he moved back ever so slightly. _Mother_ , she thought they were over this. She brought her hand back, and tried not to be disappointed. The news about Az had been a real blow to him, and she had to try to sympathise with how he might be feeling right now. If he had feelings of inadequacy before, they would be running rife now.

“In that case, I think I’ll go home for now and meet you and Felix later.”

She went to move past him, but as her arm brushed his he grabbed her forearm and pulled her to him. His right arm went around her waist, and one of hers straight to his neck. He had their other hands between them, and held it to the point where she had nearly touched. These were her favourite type of hugs from him, the ones where she was completely enveloped. She was also met with the pungent smell of whiskey and beer, and that might explain his peculiar behaviour more than his emotions did.

“The last two days with you have meant everything to me, Eleana. And maybe one day things will be different, but for now they aren’t.” He slurred. “I’ll see you later.” He let her go abruptly and left the room, and she could hear Felix’s front door closing as Kaden fled from the house.

_____

Eleana didn’t even need to try to sneak into her room. Her father was sitting on the front steps, basking in the morning light with a book in one hand and a cup of tea in the other. She was expecting a throttling, but he just gave her a gentle smile and put down what he was holding. He tapped the spot next to him, silently asking her to sit with him. His easy-going air made Eleana nervous.

“How goes, Laya?”

“Splendidly.” She said cautiously.

“Az feels better then? I was worried when Mor told me you had decided to stay the night, and that she thought it best.”

His anger, or lack thereof, made much more sense now. But why would Mor tell him that’s where she had been all night? Eleana was fully prepared to accept her fate, and was much more confounded by this.

“Azriel is fine.” She said slowly. She went and took the spot on the stairs he offered to her.

“Excellent to hear. Now.” He turned to face her directly. “There is much to discuss today, and I hate to be the bearer of bad news but your mother is still livid. I have calmed down a bit, but I have agreed with the decision she’s made about how we’re to deal with the situation that’s arisen. But before that, I need to know what’s going on, Laya. What’s _really_ going on? Your behaviour of late… has me concerned, to say the least.” He touched a hand to her shoulder, and looked at her like she was destroying him. “I won’t tell anyone what you tell me, I just want you to trust me again.”

She flopped her head down onto his shoulder and yawned. He would know soon enough about the creatures plaguing Prythian, and as for Kaden…that was not for now. He waited patiently, and she let him smooth the hair back from her face, but she remained quiet. She would not lie, so she would also not speak.

Her father sighed heavily, and gently pushed her away from him. “Come, Laya, I’ll make you breakfast.” He stood and held out his hand for her to take, and helped her stand. They needn’t open the door, because when they turned it was being opened by her mother.

“A letter of summons had arrived from Felix. We need to be at the House of Wind in an hour. Eleana, you’re to join us.” Feyre was still wearing her pyjamas, or more accurately the High Lord’s pyjamas, and her hair was messy and unkempt. Her face was pale, making her freckles stand stark, and Eleana could tell it was because of how badly she had been worrying her.

“Hurry on in, Laya, and start breakfast for me while I talk to your mother. I’ll only be a minute.” She nodded and skirted around her mother, only hearing her father whisper her mother’s name before the door shut behind her.

____

The flight to the House of Wind was glorious. Velaris was becoming considerably warmer as summer approached, and the feel of the sun blazing on Eleana’s wings made her singe with delight. She went with her parents, who she had shared a breakfast of sausages and eggs with, and had yet to be dolled a punishment.

Eleana landed on her toes and she flew through a window, and was met with the sight of all her family members. Azriel was chasing Quathryn around the room, Mor watching and laughing along - how happy they seemed, when Kaden was in unbearable pain. Cassian was snuggling into Nesta, who was swatting him away with a scowl on her face because she was trying to talk to her sister in peace.

“Elain!” Her mother instantly brightened at the sight of her older sister, and went to give her a hug. It wasn’t until you looked at all three sisters together that you really noticed their similarities. The burnt gold hair, the freckles, even their stance was the same.

Lucien was standing next to Cassian, and the two were chatting away even if Cassian was clinging onto his mate. Felix wasn’t in sight, and Eleana wondered away from her father to go find him. Rhys tapped on her mind with his magic – wondering where she was going – as she left, but she waved him off. She needed to go find her cousin. After all, this was her meeting as much as it was his.

She eventually found him setting up in the war room. He had pinned the evidence they’d found to the walls in chronological order, his own notes under each. He had also pinned the appropriate sections from the book, the story that matched the slayings. Eleana was surprised to see more there then she had previously, even more than what she had that same morning.

“You did more research without me?”

He looked at her and huffed slightly. “I have been since you discovered everything. I think sometimes you forget how busy I am, Little Laya.”

“Little Laya? You haven’t called me that since I was fourteen.” She snorted.

“I personally find it a good fit. Can you round up the old ones? I think we’re about ready to go.” Felix turned his back to her, and skimmed his hands over the assortment of documents, checking one last time that they were coherent.

“We can’t start yet.” Eleana joined him at his side, and read over the things she hadn’t been aware of. They had already decided that the bulk of the explanation would be given by Felix, but she also didn’t want any surprises. Felix would be giving the presentation for simple reasons. Firstly, he had done this many times before, even before he had constructed the Elite under Cassian’s orders. More importantly, they would take the claims with more validity if Felix was the one to give them. He was older, he was more experienced, he had been to war before. _She_ would believe anything he said.

“Why can’t we start yet?” He finally faced her, and she was a little shocked to see the deep bags under his eyes. It was hard to feel sympathetic when she knew he stayed up all night drinking with Kaden through his own volition.

She spread her arms in the empty air like it was obvious. “Kaden isn’t here.”

Felix sucked in a breath. “Uh, yes, that. No need to worry, Kaden can’t make it.”

“Can’t make it?” She questioned. “I saw him only an hour ago. He had plenty of time to sober up a bit, _you_ did, so why isn’t he here?”

Felix closed his eyes and sighed. “There are many reasons why he didn’t come, Eleana. Foremost, he didn’t want to face Azriel and Mor knowing what he does. I can’t blame him, I don’t want to either. Then there’s the fact that he would be facing our whole family while he reeks of you and alcohol and despair, and he wants no part of the politics of High Fae, or feels he can’t. And lastly, and funnily, males do stupid things when they drink, and he had to see a healer.”

“A healer?” Eleana disregarded everything else Felix said, that what nothing new to her, although she was disappointed.

“Last night, Kaden and I left the house for a while and he did something…” Felix’s face contorted, “and it got infected, and I was laughing too hard to heal it for him.”

“What did he do?” That must have been when she heard them leave during the night.

“I’ll let him tell you that. You’ll think it’s hilarious though, so no need to worry.”

She nodded her head, conceding to the fact that there was nothing she could do to get him to tell her more, or to get Kaden here. “I’ll round up the parentals.”

_____

Felix had yet to speak, for the words pinned to the walls did it for him. He sat back, patiently watching as his family members assessed his words and pictures. There was so much more than just what Laya had found, and as his family read in bewilderment, he could see that sometimes she did too. There were things he hadn’t meant to keep from her, just things he knew would be a detriment to her health. He had found many more stories about the Colloden, ones he knew would terrify her, that went back over fifty years. It was a wonder it took until her capture for someone to find it, or at least know of its existence. He understood that only a veilsinger like Kaden would’ve been able to physically see it unless it chose to reveal itself, and that may have played a part in its elusion.

Felix waited for his family to approach him, and it wasn’t long until they formed a half-circle around where he was standing, expectant looks on their faces. Eleana joined him at his side, standing with her back straight and shoulders back.

“How long have you been investigating this?” Rhys queried.

“Approaching seven months. We first noticed with the Impeath at the start of winter, and summer will mark it that long since Eleana was taken.”

“Seven months…” Elain tugged on the sleeve of Lucien and whispered something into his ear, not audible to anyone else.

“Why hold onto this for so long? If this is as serious as you claim you should’ve told us straight away. To get Amren involved and yet not tell Feyre or I?” Rhys was composed, but Felix saw straight through his uncle.

“I believe we did.” Eleana answered before Felix had a chance to. “I told you about the Impeath the night of, and if I’m remembering correctly you didn’t _believe me_.”

Felix didn’t like where this was going. Eleana was emotional in general, getting three hours of sleep a night does that to a person, and Rhys doesn’t get emotional about anything more than his daughter. _Especially_ when he feels she’s being threatened. Felix didn’t feel like being in the middle of that, or letting it cloud the bigger picture.

“That’s why we decided to gather as much as we could before we came to you, just like anyone else would if they were approaching the High Lord and Lady with a problem.” Felix added, trying to calm the situation.

“This includes testimonies from other High Lords,” interjected Lucien. “Tarquin and Glaslane.”

Elain looked stricken at the mention of the High Lord of the Spring Court. “Glaslane would have told us if there was a problem as big as this one.”

“Why? He’s the High Lord, it is his problem to solve.” Felix rebutted. He needed them to not get distracted by their children’s secrets.

“And yet you didn’t come to Lucien or me, and as you said it is ‘our problem.’” Rhys pointed out.

“That’s what I’m doing right now.” Felix answered.

Eleana was staying mercifully silent, thank the cauldron. He loved her dearly, but sometimes she let her feelings get ahead of her.

Rhys and Feyre shared a look, and then Rhys stared at Az, Lucien and Felix’s father, and Feyre her sisters, in the way he knew they were communicating silently so that he and Eleana couldn’t hear.

 _They think we’re delinquents. Or, more accurately, I am. They appreciate your work._ Eleana sent to him. He realised, without surprise, this was Eleana after all, that no shield could keep her from reading their thoughts if she wanted to.

 _That’s ridiculous._ He shot at her, hoping she was still in his mind so she could hear.

_Is it? You lead the Elite, and I run around and cry all the time. Nesta thinks I should stay in Velaris, Lucien, Elain and Mor agree. Cas is unsure, but Az and my parents think the decision should be mine. Az thinks we’ll wage a war if we’re separated._

Eleana was casually looking around, pretending she had no idea their family was ‘talking’ about them while they were right there, and that she wasn’t relaying their conversation straight to him.

 _I’m surprised about Mor._ He thought.

 _She was the one who checked the wards that very first time at the Mountain, remember? She thinks someone is controlling us. Ha! I’d like to see someone try to enter my mind._ As Eleana laughed in his head, her shoulders shook in real life.

 _And they wonder why we didn’t tell them until we had evidence._ Felix rolled his eyes.

Rhys hummed loudly and the adults, well, much older people, turned back to face Felix and Eleana after they had inadvertently put their backs to them as they conversed.

“This is good work,” Rhys told them. “We’ll take it from here, and you can resume as you did before this all started.”

“I can come to Velaris daily to help. The Elite can also be an asset when we need to go anywhere other than the Night Court. What time do you want the meetings to be?” Felix asked. He had been in these situations countless times – he had been working for them for years. He had even fought in a mortal war by the decision of Rhys, and had been a Night Court diplomat at councils.  

Rhys response to his asking to do something would be no different to usual, so why was his answer taking so long?

“There’s no need for you to be there.” His father answered instead. “Go home and focus on the Elite. We’ll summon you if we need to.”

 _What the fuck?_ Eleana burst into his thoughts.

“Seems you didn’t hear everything, Laya.” He said aloud. His family looked at him in confusion, and Felix gritted his teeth. “Eleana and I have done all this work,” he said to his father. “We deserve to see this through.”

“This is the decision that has been made.” Azriel said. He took a step towards them, his hands raised in surrender. “You need not worry, Felix. The problem is with us now.”

Felix scoffed and stared his uncle down. “What wonderful reasoning.”

“You two aren’t experienced enough to deal with something on this scale.” Nesta said, her hands cradling her belly.

“But how can we get experience if you don’t give us the opportunity?” Eleana asked, pleading with them. “We can do this right, let us show you. At least, Felix can do it, and he could teach a water wraith to walk, so imagine the wonders he could do with me.” She smiled.  

“I’m sorry, butterfly, but this isn’t up for discussion.” Rhys returned her smile, though his was shielding the worry in his eyes when he looked at his daughter.  

“Why?” Eleana walked to her father, her hands clasped in front of her. “I – I think you’re lying.” She admitted to him quietly. “Please don’t lie to me.” Her voice as quiet as the breeze.

Rhys let out a shaky breath. “You’re too close to this, and I don’t want you near something so dangerous when your magic is this unstable.” He revealed.

Eleana stepped back and nodded. Felix wished he could be like her and just see into people’s thoughts. He wanted to know why her eyes downcast, and why her lips trembled. He wondered what it must be like to be so very powerful, and yet feel like you can’t do anything. To have a male that is your equal, and a perfect other half, only for him to reject you. It is often said that Eleana is delicate, that Eleana is unwell, Eleana is emotional, but as Felix looked at his cousin backing away from her beloved father, he realised that it must be very hard indeed to _be_ her.

 “Keep us informed, Feyre.” Elain said as farewell, it was clear that this meeting was over. “I need to talk to my son.”

They all pottered away, even Feyre and Rhys, until it was just Felix and Eleana left in the room.

“I hate when Elain calls Glaslane her son.” He said to break the tension.

“Why?” She snorted. “She raised Glaslane from the age of seven. Seems logical to me.”

“Because I’ve slept with Glaslane.”

She started laughing, so hard her body shook and silver lined her eyes. “Felix! How did I not already know this?”

“I’ve been with so many they tend to be a blur. Besides, you’ve had sex with Kaden.”

Her laughter slowly died down, but the smile on her face never left. “I have indeed.”

“And?”

“And I have a story to tell you. A tale about a boy and a girl and a room.”

“Please tell me it’s not what I think. It’s one thing to know it happened, but I really don’t need details.”

Eleana linked her arms with him and started to walk in the direction of the stairs that graced the mountain below them. “It’s not what you think.”

 

 

 

 

 


	18. Chapter 18

“I found something,” Mor breathed, as she clutched the tattered and worn book in her hand.

Azriel’s gaze snapped to her, his hazel eyes snatching on the book in her hands. It was old and musty, and it smelt of rain and mould and gave the room a horrible stench, but she didn’t care. Because, finally, she had found something about Kaden’s mother.

“Where?” Was all Azriel asked. He stood from his position in the war room, still configuring the files given to them by Eleana and Felix. This was the moment they had been waiting for. This meant that they could tell Kaden the truth, and have something to offer him about his past.

“Ralis. Hewn City has been illegally dumping there for years, and the local faeries had been hoarding anything they thought could be valuable. Once upon a time, this book was engraved in gold.” Mor had to hold back tears as her hands shook from excitement and exhilaration. When she had first found it, digging around in piles of nick knacks, her hope had been half hearted. It wasn’t until she opened the diary, and started reading, that the tears overcame her the way her relief did.

“What is it?” Azriel looked too cautious to move any closer to her, as if the thing she had finally found would vanish if he hoped too hard or came too close.

“It’s a diary from an unnamed woman, talking about the affair she had with an Illyrian on Starfall, and the baby she had consequently. A baby with shocking dark eyes, and lovely blonde hair just like hers.”

“Could it possibly be about Kaden? That diary would be from over twenty years ago. How could it have survived Ralis, even in the care of the faeries?” He took a step closer to her, eyes still pinned to the journal.

“The baby she speaks of – _her_ baby – is described with the wings of an Illyrian and the magic of a fae. She speaks about him watching things, smiling at things that no one else could see. How his golden skin was a contrast to the paleness of the people that lived underground. She calls him her baby of Starfall, blessed by the spirits.” Mor’s voice shook as much as her hands, and she reached out to Azriel who finally took the book from her hands.

He flicked through the pages, being as careful as he could so as not to damage the delicate pages. His eyes raced back and forth, taking in the words about his nephew. “She didn’t name him Kaden.”

“No, she did not.”

“That doesn’t mean anything.” Azriel closed the book as well as his eyes, and breathed a deep sigh.

“I doubt they told anyone his name when they abandoned him to the Illyrians. He was given a name when they likely thought he didn’t have one. There’s more.” Azriel looked at her, raising an eyebrow. “Read until the end,” she told him. The diary started the moment she discovered she was pregnant, and ended with Kaden leaving. “That’s the most important part.”

Mor went to her husband and left a lingering kiss to his cheek. This was something he would want to read alone.

____

 

“I never thought I would be this close to your penis. It’s not as unpleasant as I had imagined.”

Kaden rolled his eyes and shifted around so he could sit in a more comfortable position. He, too, never imagined having Felix’s head practically in between his thighs, but here they were. 

After they had finished a gruelling training session with the Elite, Kaden realised that his newly acquired tattoo had started to bleed, quite profusely, and he was too embarrassed to go back to a healer, so instead he enlisted the help of his best friend. He had gotten the tattoo a few days ago, on the night he had found out about Azriel. He was drunk and sad and had the brilliant thought of permanently inking into his skin the best day of his life – the day he had spent with Eleana. He and Felix had wandered to an Illyrian they knew did tattoos, and honestly this is only something he could’ve done intoxicated. He let the Illyrian female tattoo between the teeth marks Eleana had left on the inside of his upper thigh, a beautiful, black and red rose.

It had gotten infected immediately.

Now Felix was inspecting it and doing as much as he could without ruining the tattoo. And that happened to require Felix getting very up close and personal with Kaden.

“I can’t wait until you show Eleana. She’s going to smack you for being so stupid. Here, want a pastry to distract yourself?” Felix reached behind him and a plate of apricot pastries appeared on the table. He offered one to Kaden, who graciously accepted.

“I don’t think I’ll ever show her.” His words were garbled around the multiple delectable treats he had shoved in his mouth.

“I’m going to have to clean the couch after this. You’re leaking everywhere.”

“You need to throw this couch out, Felix.” Kaden fluffed Felix’s hair and then winced as Felix targeted a particularly sensitive spot.

“I’m nearly done.” He reassured.

How embarrassing. Kaden can’t even get a tattoo right. What will it be like after he does the Bloodrite, and he has them covering his body? At least they would match the dark rose on his thigh.

Felix didn’t take too much longer, and when he was done he wrapped it with herbs and gauze as another preventative measure. His magic should do the trick, but you can never be too careful.

“Thank you. It must have been traumatizing to have to go through that.” Kaden joked.

“Trust me, if this is the worst thing I see today I will have been blessed.” Felix helped Kaden stand, and the two moved towards the door.

They weren’t finished for the day, but they couldn’t exactly show up to assess aerial units while Kaden was in the state he was. They opened the door and made their way down the path that led to the mountains that held the units. It was blazing hot, summer less than a week away, and the warmth was enriching. When they got there, Felix instructed him to make notes of the flyers while Felix praised and critiqued them. They were doing various flying drills and courses, and Kaden felt weirdly smug that the women often overpowered the men. Felix would occasionally point out a particular person and tell Kaden to remember that move so he could do it in the future. Felix also had to write reports for every person they evaluated, and Kaden acted as his scribe while Felix spoke aloud while watching them. This meant that sometimes Kaden didn’t get to see the flying, but if there was something important to see then Felix always made sure Kaden saw.

There was one female, nothing but praise, who blitzed the course and everyone else’s scores by miles. Kaden struggled to write everything Felix was saying, and eventually stopped when Felix’s evaluating turned to commentary – like he was watching a game and his favourite team was playing. Which made sense, when Kaden looked up and saw that the female who had just completed the course was Eleana. She was too far away to see them, but her silhouette would never be lost to Kaden.

She had her arms above her head and was stretching her back, making it arch. Her leathers hitched up the tiniest bit, exposing just a slither of skin at her hip. A sliver that Kaden had touched and roamed and-

He needed to focus.  

He and Felix left once their work was done, unfortunately not seeing Eleana before they went. Dusk had started to fall, unlike the heat, and Kaden and Felix made their separate ways when it came to the split that Kaden took to go back to his tent. Felix had objected every time Kaden insisted that is where he wanted to continue residing, and Kaden doubted Felix would ever stop. At least Eleana had stopped asking.

As he made his way, he shirked off his leathers to try and escape the heat. The night breeze was helping, and Kaden was grateful he would have it surrounding him. He thinks he might have duck for dinner, he just has to go hunt some. Worst comes to worst, he still has some dried nuts and fruit he can snack on.

His plans went awry though, when he noticed Azriel standing in front of his tent, shadows fully fledged, his back turned. Kaden knew Azriel had heard him approach, and kicked himself for not noticing the older male sooner. If he had, he might’ve taken up Felix’s offer of refuge.

“Kaden.” Azriel didn’t turn, just continued to search through the trees and under bush with his heavy gaze.

“Azriel.” Kaden swallowed. He didn’t know what to expect from this, but whatever it was, he doubted it would be pleasant. Was Azriel here to punish him for causing a rift between him and Eleana?

Kaden’s breathing became heavy, and the stabs of pain he’d initially felt those days ago became fresh. He could summon Felix, or Eleana, either would come in a heartbeat. Either way he did not want to be here with the man who had made it clear he wanted nothing to do with him.

A thought crossed his mind, that maybe Azriel was mad about what Kaden had done to his brothers. But that was ludicrous. Was it? Yes, it was. His nerves were just making him think crazy things.

“Eleana must have told you the truth by now.” Azriel voice was deathly quiet, and Kaden hated to admit to himself that he was scared to approach the male.

Scared and embarrassed.

His cheeks flamed red at the thought of every moment he had spent with the famed shadowsinger. The outbursts he’d had, the _hope_ he’d had. So he stayed silent, letting Azriel dictate the conversation.

“From the glares she gives me every time I see her, I assume that you must have strong feelings on the subject.” Azriel continued. “I can’t begin to imagine what you must have thought of me, what you must have thought of yourself.” Azriel turned, and Kaden was shocked to see the tear stains marring the emotionless male’s face.

“Stop.” This wasn’t a conversation Kaden wanted to have. Not now, not ever. He never wanted to have to face Azriel again.

“I can explain, Kaden.” Azriel stepped forward, and hand outreached.

“I don’t want to hear it. I don’t need to hear whatever explanation you plan on giving me, and as far as I’m concerned you needn’t bother yourself with me again.” Kaden stepped away from Azriel and made a beeline in the other direction. Felix was sure to still be awake, probably making dinner, and his friend never said no to guests or to the opportunity to cook for them.

Kaden could hear Azriel following him, and was grateful that no other Illyrians sullied themselves with this area of the camp.

“I wanted to tell you,” Azriel grabbed Kaden’s arm, forcing him to stop and look at him. “But I wanted to wait until I had something to give you, more than just my home and family.”

Kaden shook off his arm, but still stayed focused on Azriel. “With all due respect, fuck off. I don’t need whatever pathetic story you’re going to tell me just so you’re okay with Felix and Eleana again. I know the truth now, and I’m not mad, but I can’t stand here and listen to this bullshit.”

There was a small part of Kaden that was curious to what lie Azriel would tell, but there was also a small part of him that had started to believe that he was worth something. And for that tiny, miniscule part to grow, Kaden had to stop lingering on things like this.

“I’m not the one you want to speak to right now,” Kaden lowered his voice. “Go see Felix and Eleana. Make amends. I won’t interfere. The last thing I want is for them to be angry at you for this, and if it’s any consolation, they won’t be for long. You mean far too much to them for that.” Kaden was telling the truth. The last thing he wanted was for them to be mad at their uncle, and he could see them already wavering. That morning alone, Felix had extra scones and his first thought was to send them to Azriel; Azriel loved his scones! Then he looked at Kaden, and lowered his hands, and the scones remained where they were. This is not what Kaden wanted. Felix’s family was a gift, truly beautiful, and never did he want something to change that, least of all him.

“You have to believe me.” Azriel begged. Kaden had never heard the man beg, and didn’t like it – didn’t like him lowering himself like that. “It’s not that I don’t – that I don’t want you as part of my family. My wife adores you, I think you are a brilliant young man. But I wanted you to come when you were more secure in yourself. When you weighed your self-worth as more than just the relationships you had with people. That isn’t a way to sustain yourself. I thought that if I could give you more, some information about your past, make you believe you didn’t have to live in that damn tent, then you could see what I see. What Felix sees.”

Azriel had piqued Kaden’s interest, and he started _really_ listening. Taking in Azriel’s words.

“Mor has done so much in the past few months, everything she can to try and find your mother-”

His mother?

“-so we could piece together your past, and help you heal.” Azriel finished. Only now did Kaden realise that Azriel was holding something to the side in his other hand. It was an old book, rotting and mouldy, but Azriel was holding it like it was the most precious treasure. “Mor found this today in Ralis, having been thrown out from Hewn City. It’s a diary of a young fae who became pregnant after a drunken night with an Illyrian on Starfall. She inquired further, and it’s been in the possession of local faeries for nearly twenty years.”

Kaden started shaking as Azriel tried to hand the book to him, jerking his head in protest. “I don’t want it.”

“It’s about you. It could only be about you.”

“There’s a mistake. You’ve made a mistake.” Kaden took a faltering step back. “My mother didn’t love me, she never would’ve written about me.”

“There is so much you don’t know. Take this, read it, and summon me if you would like to talk.” Azriel gave him the book, shoving it forcefully, but carefully, into Kaden’s quivering hands, before disappearing.

Kaden looked down at the fraying book, and stumbled his way to Felix’s home. If the contents of this diary were about him, he didn’t think he could read it on his own.

When he came to Felix’s, he just walked in. It was a habit that he had adopted lately, and he knew that he should be politer and knock, but thoughts of etiquette often left his mind when he was this emotional. He senses went straight to the kitchen, smelling the comforting aromas of basil and garlic as Felix cooked. Felix’s baking sometimes overshadowed his cooking, but both were immaculate.

“Felix!” He called out, and went to sit down on the couch. He hummed in amusement when he noticed that Felix had cleaned it.

“My favourite bastard returns!” Felix replied from the kitchen.

Kaden didn’t say anything, just let Felix finish and come out in his own time. He was in no rush, and didn’t want to disturb his friend any more than he had to.

He waited, and Felix came out minutes later with dinner for them both – pasta with a lovely tomato sauce and minced beef. Felix handed him a plate and sat next to him, wasting no time as he began munching away at his meal. Kaden did the same, forgetting the book and just letting himself enjoy a hearty dinner.

They were both done and leaning back when Felix asked him why he had come by.

“Azriel came to visit me.”

Felix raised his eyebrow. “And what did he say?”

“He gave me this.” Kaden pulled the book out from the couch next to him and handed it to Felix. Felix wiped his hands on his pants then scanned through the pages, but stopped soon after the beginning.

“This is… your mothers? How can that be?” Felix closed the book with care, smoothing his hands over the cover.

“I don’t know.” Kaden admitted. “But I do know I can read it alone.”

Felix nodded, and moved the book between them so that, together, they could read it from start to finish.

____

 

Kaden sat in silence next to his friend, both too blown away by what they just read to speak. It had been like this for nearly an hour, since the moment they closed the book, the last and only words of Kaden’s mother that they would ever know still splayed before them.

He couldn’t remember her a single bit, and know he knew why. He had always had this image of pure truth in his mind. The story of his mother was one that he thought he knew. Now, he realised he didn’t know much of anything.

Kaden felt a surge of love for the nameless, faceless fae that had birthed him.

Reading her diary was heart-wrenching in a way he had never felt before. Reading her words, now knowing how much she _loved him_ … It was something else entirely.

“She didn’t give you away.” Felix shuddered.

“No.”

“Your name isn’t Kaden.”

“Apparently not.”

“And she fought for you with everything she had. She wanted to keep you, until her last moments.”

“It’s not clear whether she died or not.”

Felix placed a hand on his arm, and Kaden could see the unshed tears lining his eyes. “Hope is a dangerous force of nature when focused on the wrong person. What Keir did to her was a death sentence, Kaden. Make no mistake in that.”

Kaden let out a trembling breath, his eyes squeezing shut in an effort to hold back his emotion. Why had Azriel given him this? If what he was saying was true, and Lady Morrigan had been searching all these months to find information on his mother so that they might piece together his broken past… Well, that would mean that they care. A lot.

Could this mean – could this possibly mean that he might one day have a family? One of his own flesh and blood, that cared for him despite his shortcomings. People that he could stand there, waiting for him after the Bloodrite, one day invite to his wedding, introduce his children to, someone to be proud of him.  

Kaden looked down at the last passage in in mother’s diary, still open in his hands.

_My most lovely Dimitri, how I love him so. One day, maybe once we’re both stars racing across the night, I will chase him and join him again. I hope they told me the truth, and that he is now with his father, stretching his beautiful wings to the wind and singing the song of the sky. My little boy, the most precious baby, I will never forget his curls and smile until my very last breath._

_I can no longer fight. I can barely move my hand, but I want this etched somewhere so that at least when I lose my mind, I will never lose him. From the moment I felt him growing, the life he breathed into my soul, I knew he was the only thing I ever needed to be happy. How I have been blessed!! Although I am to remain forever in this retched place, with people who are not my kin nor my friends, I am glad that my baby boy will be free._

_I am crying, so profusely that I’m worried my tears will smear the ink as I write this. I can’t help but see the wonderful future he is to have without me. I want to see in person the first time he takes flight, his first steps, his firsts words. I want to be there when he trains, uses his special magic. I already know that he will have the finest of wives, and it ruins me to think that I will never see him marry. He is but a baby, but I can see his whole future ahead of him._

_A future that I am not in._

_I don’t anyone to ever make the mistake of thinking that I don’t love him. That I don’t want my son. He’s gone, and soon I will be too. If the Mother is gracious, maybe she will let me watch him as a cloud._

It ended there, with a spatter of ink droplets on the page.

“Where can I – if I found out more about the punishments then I could find her. Who would I speak to? Could you take me there, to Hewn City?” Kaden – or should he call himself Dimitri? – pleaded with his friend.

“If you want more, you need to speak to Mor.” Felix shook his head and pinched the base of his nose. “This is huge.”

“What are you on about?”

Felix started down at him and the book. “I’m so very incredibly happy for you. Now run along and sneak into Velaris you pesky bastard.”

_____

 

Kaden didn’t know exactly which house belonged to Azriel and Lady Morrigan, but it wasn’t hard to track them. He reached a house that was shockingly colourful, with plants growing on every conceivable service. He could see lamps lit inside, the whole place as bright as a star, and before he knocked he tried to slow his heavy breathing. Why was it only in the worst of circumstances that he came to Velaris? This was Eleana’s home, and one day he hoped he would be able to see it the way she did. Now, whenever he thought of the city, he couldn’t help the feeling of dread that entered his body.

When he felt he was calm enough, he knocked on the door.

Lady Morrigan was the one to open it. She was wearing practical clothing, a sturdy blouse and leather pants, and was holding a steaming cup of tea. She looked shocked to see him, and Kaden could feel pink starting to stain his cheeks.

“Lady Morrigan, I hope I’m not disturbing you.”

“No – No. Of course not. Come in.” She ushered him inside, closing the door behind him. Kaden awkwardly stood in her doorway until she forced him into the longue, making him sit on an expensive looking arm chair. She put the tea down beside him on a side table, and then pulled a blanket out of thin air and covered him with it.

“Lady Morrigan?”

“You just sit tight right here, okay? I’ll get Azriel, and we can all speak, and you drink that tea up, it’s good for you. Take your shoes off, make yourself at home, and I’ll – and I’ll get some snacks. Are you hungry? I can make you dinner.” She rambled.

Kaden tried to move the blanket aside, but she quickly moved forward and tucked him back in again, as if going on instinct alone. “That won’t be necessary, Lady Morrigan. I’ve already eaten, and it’s nearly summer.” He moved the blanket back again, and she realised what she had been doing. She skittered back. Kaden had never seen her this shaken before.

“Yes, of course. Okay. Stay here. I’ll get Azriel, but you stay right here. I’ll be only a minute.”

She nodded in affirmation, but didn’t go anywhere. She was clearly very nervous, and Kaden felt uncomfortable that he was making her feel that way.

“I can leave, Lady Morrigan-”

“Mor. You must call me Mor.” She covered her mouth with her hands, taking in the sight of him bedraggled and sitting on her chair. “I’m sorry, Kaden. This is just not how I wanted the first time you were in our home to be.” She whispered. “Stay.” She said louder and with more surety.

She left in a flourish, so quickly that if Kaden blinked he would have missed it. He sat back in the chair and braced his hands on its arms. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, inhaling the scent of citrus and tea that inhabited their home.

He could hear muffled voices from upstairs, but they didn’t seem to be arguing. Deciding he was in much too vulnerable a position, Kaden stood up and paced around the room, observing the things Azriel and Morrigan had collected over the years. He could hear Mor and Azriel’s footsteps coming down the stairs, and his heart hammered in his chest.

He was inspecting their collection of books, many the same as Eleana’s, when Azriel cleared his throat to get his attention.

“So, my name is Dimitri and my mother didn’t give me away.” Kaden opened ruefully.

“Your name is still Kaden. It was unlikely they told my brother you already had a given name, so he gave you one. Little things like that do not change who you are.” Azriel assured him.

Kaden held up the book. “And this is everything you know?”

Lady Morrigan nodded vehemently. “Yes, yes of course.”

Kaden broke eye contact with her, and shuffled. “Is there a way to find out more? She mentions a lot about Hewn City, but it seems like she wasn’t born there. And her name? I would love to know her name.” He said wistfully.

“I will find out as much as I can, son. We,” Azriel entwined his fingers with that of his wife. “We will never stop, unless you want us to.” Azriel’s gaze was heavy on Kaden, making him look at the ground instead.

Both Azriel and Lady Morrigan were just so _intense_. It was hard to see them looking at him with so many expectations.

“There are other things.” Morrigan strode to him and clasped his hands in hers, the book a jumble in between them. “We want more than just to help you learn. We want to be here for you, and support you, and embrace you.” She had a broad smile on her face, but Kaden could see it was just there to hide her tears. But why was she upset?

“Please, you don’t need to be sad, Lady Morrigan. I can fend for myself, you don’t have to worry about me. Or feel guilty.” Kaden believed that was all this was.

He hadn’t even told Felix or Eleana, but since discovering that Azriel was his uncle, he remembered the time they first met. Not when Eleana was taken, but when Kaden was a mere child too shy to come out from behind his father’s legs. He was so scared of the shadowsinger, knowing who he was to the court but not who he was to his father. That didn’t unsettle him. What did, was the fact that Azriel would’ve known that he existed, and he would’ve known what happened to bastards in a family like that. And looking at the guilt that emanated from Azriel and Lady Morrigan, they had thought of this too.

“We’re not doing this out of guilt, Kaden.” Azriel spoke. “We want you. We want you to be a part of our family.”

“But why?”

“Because you’re terrific.” Morrigan answered instantly. “And we – we don’t know how to be parents, and we know you’re an adult, but we still want you in our home. We want to look after you, and show you what it’s like to have a real family. You a such a strong young man, and when I see you I see the Azriel I met over six hundred years ago, and I think about how his life changed because he met a woman who wanted him as her own. I want to be that for you.” She squeezed his hands, and he searched her face for any ill-intent.

Finding none, he squeezed her hands back, and instantly her smile became genuine.

“Come. Let us show you something.” Azriel was smiling too, and he walked away and up the stairs. Kaden followed, releasing Lady Morrigan’s hands.

They led him up and then down a corridor. All the doors were open, they were either studies, more longue rooms, or bed rooms, except for one door that remained closed. Azriel twisted the simple ebony handle and stepped inside.

It was another bedroom. The walls were a pale yellow, the floor the softest blue carpet. There was a bathroom off to the right, and a king bed pushed up against the left wall. The wall straight in front of him was all glass, giving him a wonderful view of Velaris. A stunning pianoforte was in the centre of the room. Besides that, it was bare.

“This is the room we made for you, in case you ever wanted to stay in Velaris with us.” Azriel explained.

“The bathroom is all stocked, scented soaps and candles ready to go.” Morrigan bristled into the room and started to point things out to Kaden. “The floor has just been cleaned, and I’ve left a few sets of clothing in the closet. They are yours. Everything in this room is yours. If you stay, you are here as a member of the family and it is just as much your home as it is ours. You are free to have guests over,” She moved to the bed, and pulled out a draw that was imbedded beneath. “And if you have Eleana over, I have left tonics and other various types of protection in here for your use.”

Kaden’s face flamed. He could never bring Eleana here while Azriel and Morrigan were in the house. She was too… loud.

And they were just friends. Yes. That too.

“It’s yours, if you want it.” Azriel placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Maybe I could stay here tonight.” Kaden suggested. “It’s late, and I flew here from the camp.” These things had clearly been here for a while. The carpet was indented below the feet of the pianoforte, same with the other furniture. When Kaden peered into the closet, there was a hanger that was empty, a hanger that would’ve held the coat Lady Morrigan gave him during winter.

They had been planning this for a while.

Kaden’s hands lingered over the keys of the pianoforte, a passion he had yet to fully explore. He loved to play, often did for the children in the share houses, even sharing his meagre knowledge with them. Azriel would’ve heard him play before, or heard Felix talk about it, and had made a conscious decision that Kaden would want one in his room.

“We’ll leave you be.” Morrigan came up and pressed a kiss to his temple. “If you need anything, just call out. I’ll make us breakfast in the morning, and we can discuss what Azriel and I have been doing the past few months. I’ll warn you my pancakes aren’t as good as what you’re used to with Felix, but I’ll try my best!” She laid her palm on his face, and then left, Azriel on her heels.

“Thank you!” He called out after them.

Kaden scoured through the closet, finding a set of silk pyjamas in his size. He was hesitant to put them on, knowing he didn’t deserve them, but he did anyway. He didn’t want to offend them. He crawled into the bed, and it was so comfortable and big that he nearly drowned in it and he wouldn’t have minded.

It was strange though. He had never slept in a bed without Eleana, and he didn’t know if he wanted to. Maybe he would summon her just for tonight, so he could debrief her on the day’s events. Azriel and Morrigan said she was more than welcome.

Yes. Calling Eleana. He just might do that.

 

 

 


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this is the first chapter since the release of ACOWAR! So, there are going to be a few things that don't match up, but thank you for your support anyway!

As Az reflected on the last four weeks of his life, a broad smile couldn’t help but etch its way across his face.

Kaden had come nearly every night for dinner, leaving after breakfast so that he could spend his time with Az and Mor but also train. The moments with him had been a blessing, and Az wondered if this was what it was like to have a child…

He had stand out moments, like the time he and Mor had woken up to find Kaden had already prepared them a full breakfast of bread, eggs, bacon and fruit. He had told them that he’d spent the whole day before practising with Felix so he could get it right. It was a bit soggy, and had gotten a bit cold, but it was one of the best meals Azriel and Mor had ever tasted. Another great memory was the time Kaden called Mor, well, Mor. It was just a casual conversation, a _‘thank you for dinner, Mor.’_ His wife had stared blankly at Kaden until she’d burst into tears and tugged him to her so she could hug him tightly.

Another, Azriel’s favourite, was when Kaden started to wear the clothes they had bought him. It had taken over two weeks to convince him that they weren’t going anywhere. It took many conversations to even get him to believe a shadow of his worth.

Azriel could tell when he looked at his wife how much the boy meant to her already. She was a true mother hen around him – constantly fussing over him and loving him endlessly. It made Azriel… regret his choice of not telling Kaden straight away. They could have had months more with him, but at least they had eternity to make up for it.

Azriel watched the Elite train, taking notes on all the members. It was hard to give his attention to anyone but his talented nephews, but he had been assigned to do so. Every year the Elite was reviewed, and this summer the duty had fallen on Azriel.

It was a delight!

He couldn’t help but cheer like a proud father every time Kaden won an event, or bet an opponent. When it came for the event where they all individually fought Felix, Kaden had been amazing. The event was less about trying to beat Felix, but stand a chance against him for the longest. Azriel needed no affirmation that Cassian’s son was an unequal warrior, the boy had already bet him in combat several times. But Kaden had lasted nearly ten minutes. That was close to the record!

At one point, Eleana had stood next to him to watch. There were hundreds of spectators, anyone who could come did. Rhys was somewhere with Feyre, no idea that they were watching their daughter’s mate fight their nephew and compete in the events. Cassian would’ve been here boasting about his son, but Nesta was too pregnant (and cranky) to leave Velaris.

Eleana stood with him because then her worry wouldn’t be so evident to others, and because he had the best view. Things were still tense between them, and Azriel missed her dearly. He didn’t know how to make it up to her, had never been at the sharp edge of the sword that was her anger.

She left before he could say a word to her, and he made a note to find her later and apologize again.

Kaden came to him afterwards, he was one of the standouts of the whole thing, and Azriel had never felt this kind of pride before. He’d wrapped his arms around him and told him exactly how proud he was, and Kaden, very flushed, had said his thanks and told him he’d see him at dinner – Eleana was waiting for him.

Such young love – hopefully soon Kaden would feel the bond the way Eleana so strongly did.

_____

 

It was mid-afternoon, and Kaden had shed his leathers and shirt to bask in the sun as he walked around to find Eleana. Today had gone well, better than well, and he knew she was there watching him. He could feel her, as if she was sending him her strength through an invisible tether attaching the two.

He wandered along, random Illyrians whistling at him and bellowing their praise. If only his father could see him now. Would he be proud? Azriel was, it seemed. The last month with Azriel and Mor had been… a very good one. Maybe the best of his life.

“Kaden!” He heard his name called from behind him, and turned only for Eleana to crash into him. She threw her hands around his neck, and his went straight around her. “You were wonderful! You beautiful Illyrian you!” She kissed his cheek, her eyes bright with wonder.

“I was shitting myself the whole time.” He would never tire of the way she looked at him, not in all eternity.

“I watched with Az.” She pulled away from him, but clutched his hand in hers, leading them away. “How have things been? With Mor and Az.”

She was looking at their feet, and he could feel the longing she had for the family members she was bickering with. He had told her a million times to not fret over what Azriel did, or didn’t do, but she said she couldn’t be as forgiving. Not when Azriel had done something that hurt _him._

“It’s been amazing, truly. Your uncle Cassian comes a lot, often with little Lady Quathryn. She’s a very cute child, but don’t tell that to Felix. He’s under the impression I think he’s the cutest.” Kaden winked at her, and she smiled shyly at him in return. He pinched her cheek in response, his own smirking growing broader. “Why so shy?”

She breathed deeply and swung their hands between them. “You seem happy, Kaden. I know that we’ve barely spoken in weeks, and I’m so happy that you’re off in Velaris, but I guess I’ve just missed you. A lot.”

Kaden had realised many things while living with Azriel and Morrigan. Firstly, maybe bastard borns weren’t as lowly as he had always thought. Of course, Kaden had always known that the general and shadowsinger were born out of wedlock, but they had saved Prythian in the war against Hybern - had earned their positions. Kaden was nothing. Or not, as that was the second thing he had learned. Every day, Azriel and Morrigan drilled more confidence into him, made him feel self-worth. Eleana had to, but it was different from figures who acted parental.

“I’ve missed you too, Eleana. More than words can describe.”

Because lastly, in these weeks where he was separated from the first person to make him feel _alive_ , he realised that the feelings he had for her were far more than friendship.

It had been a warm evening, and Eleana hadn’t shared his bed since that first night at Azriel and Mor’s. He had been to Velaris earlier with Azriel and Mor, not worried about running into the High Lord because he was busy with his mate. He had found a little alcove of sorts, and his first thought was that here would be the perfect place to teach Eleana more dances. He’d put it into a letter as soon as he’d gone home, and discussed not only that but also how much he loved her rainbow. He talked about how she could see them walking along the Sidra side by side, jealous fae seething as he had the honour of escorting the heir. When he signed it, he felt the need to say

_I love you_.

So he did.

He never sent it to her.

“I heard Felix say this was good preparation for the Bloodrite, are you taking it soon?” Her voice seemed nervous, as if she was concerned. He was touched by that, now that he had finally said, or written, what he had been feeling for a while now.

Fear was something Azriel told him was acceptable. Letting it control you was not.

“It will be soon, in about two months.” He was not hesitant in the slightest. Felix told him that he was ready, and if Felix believed him so than that was good enough for Kaden. It also helped that today’s events had proved his worthiness of being in the first row.

“I’ll wait for you, at the end. And if you _dare_ go in without seeing me first I will throttle you. Felix did, and he had to recover more from me than he did the Bloodrite.”

“I have no doubt of that.”

They rounded a corner in the path, the two chattering away about everything they had missed from each other’s lives in the past few weeks. Besides Kaden being away with Az and Mor, Eleana had also been under strict observation from both her parents. It seemed that exposing the truth about the creatures prowling Prythian only made them more inclined to have her at their side, especially when it meant she couldn’t just wander off.

Eleana’s training had finally gone back to the way it had been before she was taken, and she told him of how exhilarating it was not to just be back in the sky, but also to fight with the ferocity she had before. She had this goal to one day rival Felix, but she doubted it would happen for a long, long while.

Kaden’s hand was becoming clammy in hers, but he wasn’t inclined to let go of her. He was taking her to Felix’s house; his friend wouldn’t be there for a while, but Kaden was free to use it as he wished.

He was surprised to see as they went to the house, that there was already quite a bit of noise coming from inside – including quiet shrieks.

They both halted, Kaden drawing a dagger he had strapped to his thigh, and Eleana summoning dark wisps of magic for her disposal. They were worried about danger, maybe even another attack, until Felix slammed out his front door and threw up over the side of his veranda.

“What’s going on?” Kaden immediately went to him, standing behind him and placing a hand on his shoulder.

“It’s happening.” Felix replied solemnly.

“What’s happening?” Eleana approached Felix from the side, taking one of his hands in hers.

“The baby. It’s coming.” Felix’s face was a low green, and his eyes were wide and staring.

That must be why Felix was home rather than debriefing with Azriel about the day’s occurrences. If Felix’s mother had gone into labour, there was nothing else Felix would be able to focus on.

“This is great news!” Kaden tried to comfort him, although he knew of Felix’s… hesitations when it came to his family.

“Is it?” Felix asked, as there was another shriek from inside the house.

Knowing what he does now, Kaden supposed that must be Nesta. But why was she here and not in Velaris? Why wouldn’t they have taken her to Velaris the moment they knew she was in labour?

“Everyone is in there – guarding my home.” Felix voice broke on the word _home,_ and Kaden started to feel dread – though he was not sure where it was coming from. He could feel it seeping into him, and although it seemed like his emotions, it was also Other. Outside.

“Everyone? Az, my parents-”

“ _Everyone_ , Eleana. Elain told Nesta that if she leaves my home before the baby is born it will _die_. My father, he freaked out. Won’t let anyone near her unless it’s the healer. Feyre is beside herself, and Elain keeps wondering in and out of prophecies. They’re all in the house guarding it from some threat, except Mor who has locked down Velaris. I just - I can’t.” Felix’s breathing became unstable, and Kaden supported him as he shifted to his knees.

“What did Elain say?” Eleana asked. She looked at Kaden with pure fear in her eyes. He hadn’t met Lady Elain yet, but did know that she was a famous seer. Azriel had suggested only the week before that they meet to see if she could tell anything about Kaden from being with him.

“ _Gold will meld the soul to the body_. She kept muttering it, and when Az asked for clarifications she said that we can’t leave the house or the baby will perish. My mother, she was already so scared. Quathryn is here too, and she doesn’t know what’s going on and we don’t know what to do with her.” Felix dragged his hands down his face, wiping away rogue vomit from his chin.

Kaden cringed at the dishevelment of his friend, and used the back of his hand to wipe away more vomit from Felix’s face. “I can take Quathryn.” He suggested. General Cassian had taken a liking to Kaden, had even figured out his relationship to Azriel, and might be willing to let Kaden help in this way. _That_ was one hell of a day, when General Cassian and Felix had come to Azriel’s home not knowing he was there. At first, the general had thought Kaden was Azriel’s _son_ , but was very quickly corrected. As far as Kaden knew, Cassian had kept the knowledge to himself (potentially under threat from Azriel).

“That’s a good idea.” Felix nodded. “You’ll stay close though, right? Maybe just let her pick some fruit from the garden. And if things go badly, I’ll send you a message and you can take her to Velaris? Mor’s put it under lockdown, but you’re such a sneaky shit I’m sure you’ll find a way in. Which is worrisome, really.”

Despite Felix’s rambling, Kaden started to feel better about the state of his friend.

____

 

Eleana watched as Felix quietly explained his plan for Quathryn to Cassian, her uncle conceding and giving her to Felix to take away.

Nesta was residing in one of the guest rooms, Elain and Feyre in there too. Eleana was too nervous to go into the room full of Nesta’s screeching, so she opted to stay in the longue with her uncles and father. She was sitting next to her father while he nervously twiddled his thumbs and created a multitude of wards around the house. The only thing that wouldn’t set them off was having the blood of their family, which unbeknownst to the High Lord, included Kaden.

When he had finished, she silently leaned into him. He had been very – smothering was not the right word, although accurate. If what they said about the creatures prowling Prythian was correct, he had just wanted his little girl always in his sight. She hadn’t minded it though. It had been years since she’d seen him so much in such short amounts of time, and she never stopped missing him – even if he was sometimes a royal pain in her ass.

Rhys looped an arm around her, kissing the top of her head. “There’s no need to worry, Little Butterfly. Elain says weird things all the time, and as much as Azriel thinks he has her crazy language down, he still makes mistakes. Not a single thing has gone wrong in the pregnancy, and the healer said Nesta is progressing nicely.”

“Her language is not crazy, Rhysand,” Lucien said, his magical eye whizzing in their direction. He was leaning on the wall across the room and was trying to disguise his nerves by acting overly nonchalant.

“Her _interesting_ language then.” The two High Lords stared at each other, both having the tall tell signs that they were speaking in a way they thought Eleana couldn’t hear.

She reached her magic out, just slightly, so she could eavesdrop. 

_She’s been right about everything else. You can’t just say she’s crazy!_ Lucien thought defensively.

_I was just trying to calm my little girl. Can’t you see how scared she is? She never huddles like this unless she’s upset, and she’s healing so well, I don’t want anything to worry her!_ Her father’s words were followed by him unconsciously squeezing her closer.

_I know Eleana is afraid, Rhys. But she’s grown now, and you need to start acting like it._

_You don’t understand-_

_Don’t you dare tell me I don’t understand what it’s like to have a child. Glaslane may not be mine by blood, and I know you hated Tamlin and you hated his mortal mother even more, but he is_ my _child, Rhysand. Blood doesn’t matter when it comes to family, we’ve established that._

Eleana pulled out of their minds before she could hear anymore. This was not what she was expecting, and this was not something she should be hearing. Her thoughts lingered on what Lucien said, _mortal mother_ , but that was impossible. She’d known Glaslane her whole life, and he was as High Fae as they came.

Felix came back, Quathryn no longer in his arms. He must have handed her over to Kaden, and Eleana could sense that her mate was still near.

Felix opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by another high pitch wail from Nesta. Felix looked at her hopelessly, and backed away into his room. Cassian, who looked as freaked out as Felix, was still in the room, his arms outstretched like Quathryn might come back and toddle right into them. Cassian’s eyes snapped between the door that led to the upset Felix and the door that led to his mate. He took a step forward, and ultimately decided to go to Nesta.

Eleana got up, and her father knitted his eyebrows and held out his own arms. “Where are you going?” He stretched his fingers in summons so that she would sit next to him again, but she turned her back.

“To speak to Felix. Knock on the door if there are any developments.” She followed straight after her cousin, and upon entering his room threw up her own shields so they couldn’t be overheard.

Felix had thrown himself face down onto his bed with his limbs splayed out. Even his wings were heaving from the effort of his breathing. Eleana sat down next to him and ran a hand through his hair.

“Felix?” She whispered. “What’s wrong?”

He turned so half of his face was exposed to her. “I’m a terrible, selfish person.”

She nearly snorted. Felix was the most generous person she knew, and she was sure Kaden would say the same thing. Maybe she could ask her mate to talk to Felix about it later. Kaden, as his best friend, could drill it into him better than she could.

“Why are you saying such ridiculous things?” She poked him on the side of the neck, and he swatted away her hand.

“Because I don’t want this child to be born. No, I don’t want it to _exist_.” His voice was clear, but so quiet that she had to lean in.

His words made no sense to her. He loved Quathryn to the stars and back, nothing could convince her otherwise, and she knew that whatever new sibling he had he would adore also.

“What do you mean?”

He braced himself on his elbows and looked her in the eyes. “Do you remember what the Impeath showed me?”

The question was not what at all what she was expecting, but she nodded her head. “I do. I will never forget that day, Felix.”

“The Impeath didn’t just show me them, it talked to me with their voices, and honestly? I struggled to tell the difference.”

Eleana tried to grapple with the relevance of what he was saying, and hoped he would continue. She had tried many times, to no avail, to get him to speak about what happened with the Impeath. That had been one of the most frightening days of her life, and the image of Nesta and Cassian Under the Mountain was as seared into her memory as the day she was taken by the Colloden.

“I remember after,” before she had been knocked out, “you attacked Nesta and Cassian because you thought you were still _there_.”

He had screamed and clawed at his parents, the vision he was trapped in only broken by Quathryn calling his name.

“The things they were saying…” Felix blanched away from the memory, clenching his eyes shut. “I don’t know if I can do this. After they had Quathryn, I thought they would stop. Weren’t we enough? Wasn’t _I_ enough?”

It was a testament to how exhausted he was that he was rambling like this. Eleana smoothed his hair back again, not knowing what else to do or say. She knew that birth wasn’t something you could control, but on a day where Felix had spent the majority of his time fighting the best soldiers in the camp and judging the merit of his own unit, it really couldn’t have happened at a worse time. Eleana knew, from tid-bit moments strung out over the last eight months, that Felix was hesitant about his parents having another child. Why, she didn’t know.

“Felix, maybe you should go with Kaden and Quathryn. I don’t know what’s going on, but I know you’ll be fine. Or I can get Az, and you can speak with him if that is easier.”

Felix shook his head and sat up. “You aren’t the only one struggling with what Az did to Kaden. I can barely look him in the eyes.”

Eleana stayed silent, and decided to just sit with her cousin. The silence lasted hours, no sound breaking through her wards. Her father would come get her if anything happened to Nesta, or if the unpredictable force Elain had said would harm the baby revealed itself.

____

 

“Did you know?” Felix whispered into the darkness. Eleana was on the verge of sleep, having given up and crawled into bed next to Felix. They weren’t touching, but there was still something comforting for them knowing the other was there. Eleana could tell from the way Felix spoke that he believed her to have drifted off, so she stayed quiet, hoping he might open more if he thought no one was listening.

“Did you know that as soon as I was born, they started trying for another baby? I remember days where I would be given to Rhys or Azriel, and it took me years to realise why. When you were born, they explained to me that they had been trying to give me a little sister or brother, and I didn’t understand. I didn’t know why I wasn’t enough for them, why they needed more. Then they brought me here – to this _camp_ – then they left me here, and I've been trying to prove myself to them since. I just want them to be proud of me. To be proud to call me their son."

Eleana made sure her breath was even and nothing would give away that she was truly listening. This was the most information Felix had ever revealed to her about his family dynamic, even though she was painfully aware that he was unhappy with it.

“I've tried to make this a home - make it as welcoming as possible, but no one ever stays.” Felix continued. “It's not like with you, where your parents would chase you to the ends of the earth. Mine waited until I was old enough and left me here to go try again with another child. I asked them if they wanted me to come back to Velaris when Quathryn was born, and they said no. My parents are having another child, Az has found another nephew and I'm alone in this house. Even Kaden will leave, eventually, now that he has Velaris and you.”

His confessions were like the words of spell binding together indiscernible fragments. The words on their own meant nothing, but together they were a catalyst. She waited for him to speak again, but his vent was over, and his own breaths smoothed to mimic hers. She risked glancing over at him, and he had closed his eyes and entered a peaceful slumber. She got up slowly, retreating from the room.

When she entered the longue room, everyone was in it but Elain and Feyre. Cassian was hunched over with both Azriel and Rhys comforting him, and Lucien was laying on the couch with his feet crossed. Cassian looked up at her entrance, and a slither of relief appeared on his face.

“Is Felix okay?” He asked.

“He’s asleep.” She didn’t know how to act around Cassian. She knew that Cassian and Nesta loved Felix, but that didn’t make her cousin’s feelings invalid. It was all just very confusing for her.

Cassian thanked her, and clapped Az and her father on the shoulders before returning to Nesta.

“How long will it be until the baby is here?” Eleana went to her father and hugged him, grateful for his unending love for her.

“Minutes, probably. Nesta kicked Cassian out of the room because he nearly fainted.” Her father’s voice was tense, and Eleana knew he would only relax when his brother’s child was born and safe.

“Are Elain and Mother in there?”

“Elain left and told us not to follow, but Feyre is still with Nesta.” Her father answered. How strange, for Elain to leave as Nesta is about to give birth? It’s rather uncharacteristic of her to leave her sister like that in a tumultuous time.

Now that Eleana didn’t have wards surrounding her, every scream and cry could be heard like rattles in her ears. She flinched as Nesta screamed in pain and fear, her cries splitting through Eleana like a dagger.

____

 

Quathryn held up a cherry tomato, offering it to Kaden. In the hours since he’d had her, dusk had come upon them. They had scoured through all of Felix’s vegetable and fruit patch and he happily let Quathryn pick her favourites to munch on. When she was full and satisfied, she made it her mission to find Kaden’s favourite food. So far, he had eaten raw potato, unripe strawberries, dirty carrots, and starchy bananas. Felix really had it all in his garden, it stretched into a maze of edible treats for the males cooking, and Kaden had to sift through it all.

This tomato, thankfully, was a perfect red orb that he had no problem popping into his mouth. “Delicious.” He told her.

She smiled wildly at him and covered her cheeks with her little hands. She looked at him brightly until a snap of a twig from behind them caught her attention. Kaden followed her gaze, and saw the final Archeron sister standing before him.

Elain was the most petite of her sisters, and her hair so long her braid reached all the way down her back. She was wearing a red sleeveless dress and her hands were calmly folded in front of her.

“Are you ready?” She asked no one in particular.

Elain had a glazed, far off look in her eyes, and it made Kaden wrap an arm around Quathryn and tuck her into his side. “Hello, Lady Elain.” He greeted. “Has Nesta had the baby? Are they ready for Lady Quathryn?” Kaden betted that if Elain was there that meant she was here to receive Quathryn, but the female said nothing of the sorts.

“Are you ready, veilsinger?” Her voice was haunting, like the echo of footsteps in an empty cave, like the rustling of leaves on a windless night.

_____

 

Nesta’s grip was like a python on Feyre’s hand. Nesta was clearly exhausted, she was coated in sweat, red from exertion, and in the rare, sparse time between contraction her eyes closed and she could barely speak. Feyre had tried to take away some of her pain, but Nesta wanted to feel it. _Feel_ as she brought a new life into this world.

“Lady Nesta, I’m going to need you to try again. You’re so close, I can see the baby’s head. Once that’s out, it’ll be a breeze. Do you understand?” The healer was crouched between Nesta’s legs, ready to get the baby. Cassian was on Nesta’s other side, his nerves proliferating with every broken breath he took. Nesta had yelled at him to get out when he re-entered, but he’d sworn there would be no fainting or anything like it this time. Nesta had snarled at him, but contently accepted his kiss to her forehead.

Nesta now cried, her only way to tell the healer that she had heard.

“One, two, okay. _Now_ , Nesta. Push now.”

Nesta’s scream was blood curdling, and Feyre looked down to see the head of the baby come out, quickly followed by its body.

Nesta whined in relief as the birth was over, and Cassian eagerly looked over, exclaiming that he knew they were going to have another little girl.

But something was wrong. Very, very wrong.

The baby, so incredibly small, was not crying. Her skin was a bluish hue, and her limbs were limp. Around her neck was a red cord, white from where it strained and stretched as it strangled her.

“Don’t look.” Feyre gasped. She put her hand on Nesta’a cheek and tried to make her sister look at her – look anywhere other than the baby that had no life thrumming in its veins.

“My sweet girl,” Nesta’s tired smile could light the sky on Starfall. “Theodosia. My baby girl.” Her smile faltered, her lips twitched, and Nesta started shaking. “Why isn’t she crying, Feyre? Cassian – Cassian why isn’t our girl crying?”

Feyre stared in horror as the healer tried to revive the baby at a small table. Her back was to them, and Feyre could feel the magic rushing out of the healer, but could hear no heartbeat other than the thundering ones of her sister and her sister’s mate.

“Feyre?” Nesta’s voice got louder, and all Cassian could do was stare in horror as the healer tried harder, smoothing her hands over the blue skin of the baby.

“Cass. Cass! No, please, _no_. Theodosia? Honey? Please, give me my baby, I can – I can help her. Oh Cauldron, Gods, Mother, please, _please_.” Nesta convulsed, heaving as she tried to get up to go to her child. Her eyes were red as blood, and her hands started pulling and yanking at her own hair.

Feyre couldn’t bear to watch her sister, and she made the mistake of looking at the healer instead. Looking at the healer as her magic stopped, looked at the healer as wrapped the baby in a blanket, looked as she picked her up and gave her to Nesta’s outstretched arms, looked as her sister sobbed while peering into the face of her child who would never see the daylight.

_____

 

“Are you ready, veilsinger?” Elain questioned him again. Kaden had put Quathryn behind him, her lower lip wobbling as Elain dug her fingernails further into Kaden’s arm.

“Ready for what, Lady Elain?” His voice quivered.

“Use your magic. Use it now. _Use it now_.”

Kaden didn’t know what he wanted, so he just summoned as much fae magic as he could. A grey haze came to surround them, one only he could see, that let him track and see the other side.

There was nothing notable to be seen.

“What do you see, Veilsinger? What do you see on the other side of the Cauldron?” Elain whispered furiously.

“There is nothing, Lady E-Elain.” He stuttered.

“Try again, before the Cauldron takes her and we cannot get her back. What do you see, son of Denora Ana?” Elain voice scratched his ears.

“Son of who?”

Elain stood just in front of the moon. It’s bright light giving her a godly glow and she stared at him. “Look. Harder.” She spat.

Kaden dragged his gaze away from Elain, keeping tabs on Quathryn while also scouring the grey for any signs. There were usual blips of light he could follow, but they were always there, as there was always something to find. Then, in the corner of his vision, he saw a spirit float past. It was an infant, floating away like it was being cradled by the breeze. Its body wasn’t corporeal, but there was no one else it could be than Felix’s newborn sibling.

“No. No, no, no, no. How? Why?” Kaden sputtered.

“Fix this. Meld her soul to her body, golden child.” Elain loosened her grip on his arm, and little drops of ruby blood trickled down his arms from where her nails had cut him.

“I can’t do that.” He said, pain straining his voice.

“Lead her soul back, the way your magic has led you. Bring her back, fuse her sprit to her body and save her life. You are a veilsinger, a deathbringer, and if you can separate the soul, you can also put it back.”

Elain sounded like she was insane, but Cauldron smite him if he didn’t listen. He pictured the globes of light that led him to discoveries, and when they appeared he tried to manoeuvre them. To make them go where he _wanted_ , rather than what was beneficial. More than that, he used them to get the attention of the spirit.

It, _the baby_ , looked at him in a way a living infant never would. It was fully aware, and as he painstakingly moved the light, its tiny body moved with them. It stopped its original destination, phantom wings sailing the spirit back towards the direction of the house.

Using his magic in this way made Kaden burn. It felt like his innards were being scraped by talons, like his flesh was being violated by the old Gods as if they were punishing him for manipulating life.

He gritted his teeth in pain, and saw Elain move to pick up Quathryn. He wanted to object, but his body could do nothing but vibrate and strain as he tried to do what Elain asked. He gasped as a shot of pain went through him, bringing him to his knees.

He could see the spirit of Felix’s sibling sliding through the walls like they were water rather than stone, and threw his mind out to try and sense where its body might be. His mind landed on a blockade of diamond and Illyrian steel. He didn’t know what it was, so he cautiously tapped his magic against the walls. Instantly, he was let through the shield, and after that he left his own body completely.

He was seeing through the eyes of someone else. They were looking at Nesta and Cassian as they lay together, the lifeless body of their baby in Nesta’s arms as Cassian quietly sung to them. Through the stranger’s mind, he projected his magic. He felt the steps falter of the person he was inhabiting, and their eyes moved as someone placed their hand of their arm.

“Butterfly?” It was the High Lord who had softly grabbed the arm of his host. “Are you okay?” The High Lord was whispering, and stood very close. Through the mind that was not his own, he could see the pure love and despair on the High Lord’s face.

His inhabited body nodded their head, and turned their attention back to Nesta and Cassian. Kaden urged his magic forward again, praying to the Cauldron that this would work, and through the grey he had summoned he could see the baby. It was just above Cassian and Nesta, looking down at its body, not knowing what to do. Elain said Kaden had to fuse the soul back to the body, but he didn’t know how.

He could feel how his own body had collapsed onto the grass, and he had lost control of his limbs. Soon, his mind would fade too.

He encapsulated the baby’s spirit in a white light, sweltering heat radiating from its surface. He brought it down, the spirit going with it, until the body Nesta was holding was also contained in it. He waited, telling his magic what to do but not knowing if it would, and then, mercifully, he could hear a cry.

The body he was in lurched, and Cassian and Nesta both startled at the sound. The whole room was deathly silent, the only noise coming from the loud, strong cries of the baby.

Kaden’s mind gave out.

 

 

 

 


	20. Chapter 20

All Kaden could hear was a loud ringing in his ears. He couldn’t move, and twigs stabbed into his skin like miniscule knives. His skin was hyper aware of every feeling on him: the individual blades of grass, the warm breeze, tiny insects skirting over his flesh. For the life of him he could not open his eyes. They were so heavy, and the harder he tried the more difficult it became.

He succumbed, again, to unconsciousness.

_____

  
At Rhys’ message of a miracle, Mor abandoned her post at Velaris. She left the guards where they were on the slight chance something could go wrong, and then fled to where the rest of her family was residing. Rhys had been unclear about what happened. The baby, Theodosia, was stillborn. And then, only minutes after but what felt like a century, she cried. And cried and cried and cried.

And she was alive.

Mor didn’t understand, so as she burst into Felix’s home the first place she went was her husband. He was in the guest room Nesta had given birth in, and he was standing pressed to Rhys. Rhys had Laya in his arms, his daughter sickly pale. Feyre was kneeling next to Nesta and Cassian who held their baby girl, and standing in the corner was Elain with Quathryn in her arms.

Felix was nowhere to be seen.

Azriel looked up at her entrance, his shoulders slumping as he greeted her by embracing her to him tightly. Mor returned his hug and kissed his mouth quickly.

_Outside._

A single whisper in her mind, and from the stiffening of Azriel, he must have heard it too. The voice belonged to their niece, and Mor looked at Eleana with an eyebrow raised. The girl really didn’t look good. She was shaking in Rhys’ arms, and he face had lost most of its vibrant colour. Mor saw Laya try and speak, but her mouth could barely move. Rhys was smoothing back her hair, probably mistaking her weakness for fear or fatigue.

_Kaden’s outside._

Azriel looked confused at the words, so Mor patted his shoulder and whispered she would go look. She hadn’t seen Kaden since he’d done his trials with the Elite, but Azriel had sent her a message before this whole debacle telling her how wonderfully he had done. In celebration, she bought him a new suit, one as fine as what the male members of the Inner Circle would wear to a formal event.

She winnowed to the veranda and started to look for Kaden. He would likely be around the back, so she leisurely walked around to find him. She was happily humming to herself, but choked when she was met with the sight of him sprawled on the grass unconscious, his nose bleeding and his wings limp.

She rushed to his side and rolled him onto his back. She pressed her ear to his chest, listening for his heartbeat and breath, and when hearing them nearly sobbed in relief. Her hands went to his face, and she pushed back his hair, and shook him slightly.

“Hey there,” she whimpered.

He groaned in response, and her heart leaped at the sound.

“Don’t talk, okay? Just let me – let me heal you a little bit.” She surged her magic through him, but it didn’t seem to be doing anything. Kaden was still clearly in pain. The only thing she succeeded in doing was stopping his nose bleed.

“Mor?” He rasped.

She shushed him and continued with her work, growing more frustrated.

“The baby?” Kaden’s voice was as dry as the desert, and he managed to move his hands enough so he was holding the bottom of her dress.

“It’s a little girl.” She was on the verge of screaming for Azriel, but she didn’t want to make a scene.

She was considering running inside long enough to grab Rhys so her cousin could heal her boy, when three figures approached her from the darkness.

She growled at them but cut herself off when she saw it was just Felix and two of his Elite. “What happened here?” She hissed.

“I don’t know. He’s fine though, just burnt out.” Felix said as the two figures stepped forward to grab Kaden. Mor snarled at them until they raised their hands and backed off. Felix, however, wasn’t having any of that.

“Go inside, Mor. I’ll deal with this.” He said calmly.

“You don’t tell me what to do.”

“If you stay here with him Rhys will come looking for you, and what do you think he’ll do when he does? I assume you’ve seen Laya, which means you know that she is one step away from joining dear Kaden on the floor. What do you think the High Lord would do if he found out it’s because his daughter was being used like a puppet by a male that he _does not know_? Worse, who do you think left him like this? Kaden was taking care of Quathryn, and now she’s in the arms of Elain. _Leave_ , Mor. I have this handled.”

The two Elite did not dare come closer to the Morrigan. Felix rolled his eyes and stepped forward, pushing away her hands and lifting Kaden up by under his arms. He hauled Kaden over his shoulder with one arm supporting him, the other waving to create wards around them. The other two males drew their swords and flanked Felix protectively.

“Where are you taking him?” She seethed.

“Somewhere safe.”

“He is safest with _me_.”

“If you left people would get suspicious. Luckily for me, the only one who would notice my absence is Eleana.”  He cocked his head to the side and started backing away.

_____

At some point in the night, Eleana had fallen asleep. When she awoke, she was tucked into Felix’s bed with her mother was reading a book next to her.  At hearing her wake, Feyre put down her book and smiled at her daughter. She put a hand on her forehead and kissed her cheek.

“You’re still running a fever.” She clucked.

“A fever?”

“You had your father worried last night. You fell asleep standing up. Luckily, he was there to hold you. I think you’re sick.”

Eleana’s whole body was aching, but she knew it wasn’t because she was ill. It was because of the way Kaden used her body last night, the bond between them still so blurred that she was also feeling the effects of his burnout.

“How’s Nesta and Cassian?”

“They’re over the moon. What we saw yesterday…” Feyre let out a loud breath. “I’ve never seen anything like that before. Maybe Thea is just showing early signs of magic? I don’t know, either way we’re all very grateful.” Feyre stood up, straightening her jumper and brushing off her pants. “Breakfast?”

“Where’s Felix?” Eleana countered. She couldn’t bear the thought of eating right now, her stomach churned at the thought. She needed to see her cousin though, to make sure he was alright and to make sure he was helping Kaden.

“He went to the share houses this morning with Quathryn. Little Thea was up all night, quite the lungs on her, and Quathryn was getting irritable. Hopefully she can have a nice nap before she comes back and is officially introduced to her new sister.”

As much as it pained her, Eleana say up and swung her legs over the bed. She was immediately met with an array of dizziness, but she didn’t let it stop her from standing. “I’m going to skip breakfast and go visit Felix. I’ll see you later.”

She went to walk, but Feyre grabbed her elbow to make her holt. “If Felix is upset you call Cassian straight away, okay? You don’t have to deal with his emotions on your own.” Feyre kissed her forehead quickly. “You can skedaddle now, Laya. I’ll save you some pancakes.”

Eleana smiled at her and walked away. She waved to her family as she walked in the longue room, intending to leave right away. Rhys insisted on hugging her first though and making her eat at least some fruit. Mor stared at her and looked like she wanted to say something, but she didn’t. Considering Eleana had told Mor to get Kaden last night and she was now here, Eleana doubted the topic of conversation would be about anything but that.

Eleana used what little energy she had to fly to the share houses. When she arrived, she went to the children’s home, knowing Felix would’ve taken Quathryn there to sleep. She walked in, and was instantly greeted by children milling around preparing for their day – hired staff following them and helping. There was a strange congregation outside one of the doors, a bunch of them on their toes with their ears pressed against the door, some holding weeds they’d mistaken for flowers.

Eleana stood behind them and knelt so she was the same height as them. “What are you listening for?”

They jumped at the sound of her voice, but looked happy to see her.

“Felix came last night!” One said excitedly. “And he brought Kaden, but he’s feeling unwell. We want to help him feel better.”

Eleana nodded. So, coming here with Quathryn was a front. Good to know.

Eleana thanked them and tried to go inside.

“Excuse me Lady Eleana, will you please give Kaden these? We picked them just for him this morning.” The voice of the small girl was timid, and it made Eleana’s heart warm. She held out a handful of weeds, and Eleana graciously accepted them.

She went into the room and was met with the sight of Kaden buried under a multitude of blankets, Quathryn sprawled on top of him, snoozing away. Her mouth was open and she had started to dribble, but Kaden didn’t notice. He was too deep in conversation with Felix.

Eleana cleared her throat to get their attention, and their gazes snapped to her.

“Laya.” Felix smirked. “There are Elite surrounding this whole building and yet none of them thought to warn me you were here. I’m not sure what to think of that.”

“Last I checked I out-ranked you.” She joked.

“That may be true, but I also have them guarding my home, and Mother knows it’s full of very powerful, very tired, very highly ranked fae.” He stood up and gave her a hug before picking Quathryn up from the bed. She whined slightly, but as soon as he pulled her closer to his chest she stopped. “I’ll leave you two be.”

He left the room, cheering and then quick hushes from the children outside happening in his wake.

Kaden was looking at her with pain laced on his face, and she wasn’t sure if it was from last night’s ordeal or because he felt guilty.

“I swear I didn’t know it was you, Eleana. I’m so sorry. I would never invade your mind like that. I – I don’t know what happened.” He gushed.

She didn’t reply right away, but rather started striping away the many layers of blanket covering him.

“What are you doing?” He asked her.

She stayed silent, and when she had peeled back the blankets and he was before her in nothing but a pair of short bottoms, she climbed in next to him. She laid her head on his chest and hooked her legs on his, wanting to be as close to him as she could. It took a few moments, but he curled around her too and snaked his arms to hold her body tight.

“What are you doing?” He asked again, his voice now a whisper.

“I’m sleeping next to the man that saved my cousin’s life, whom I love very much.” She kissed his chest and closed her eyes. All she’d done lately is sleep, but she thought she deserved it.

“Is that how you truly feel?” He ran a hand down her back, and when it came up again it had slipped under her shirt to touch her skin.

“Without a doubt – indefinitely.”

_____

Eleana supposed it was about time she did something productive with herself. She had bathed Quathryn and clothed her in a new outfit, and even snuck off to Velaris to get Kaden some more clothes from Azriel’s house. Felix had left to go meet his new sister properly, but the Elite were still stationed at his home on the off chance something happened. They were very discreet though. You wouldn’t know they were there unless someone told you.

She and Kaden left the share house together after helping give lunch to the children, all of them so enthusiastic when it came to Kaden. They absolutely adored him.

As they walked, no particular destination in mind, Kaden kept giving her weird glances. She had shut him out from her mind, needing to have it to herself for a while, so she had no idea what it was about. He would come clean eventually, he always did. He kept opening his mouth as if to say something, but always promptly shut it when she glanced his way.

The silence wasn’t terrible, just calm.

They walked into the market, buying some shawarmas. Eleana underestimated how messy it would be and groaned every time the garlic sauce dripped down her front. Kaden would just laugh and reach forward to help her clean herself. At one point, he ran his thumb across her bottom lip and popped it into his mouth, tasting it straight from her.

They rounded into an alley to get away from the crowd. There was a courtyard ahead, and you could easily hear a commotion going on. Eleana’s curiosity led her to follow the sounds, and Kaden’s affections for Eleana caused him to follow her.

In the courtyard were two Illyrians, one normal male and, surprisingly, one of the Elite. They were making snarky and lewd comments towards a group of females who looked to be in an aerial unit.

The member of the Elite was Alistair, a male significant in Eleana’s past, and Kaden stiffened at her side. She disregarded it though, she had no time for their feud when the three males were making the women so obviously uncomfortable.

 “Hello, how are you?” Eleana approached one of the woman, wedging herself between the female and the sleaze talking to her.

The female looked relieved at the sight of Eleana. Eleana somewhat recognized her from training, but the female clearly knew who she was.

“I’m quite well, Lady Eleana. What brings you here?” She held out her hands which Eleana took in her own. There was nothing better than women standing by other women, except being friends with them.

“Had to get my man some food. Males are rather grumpy when they’re hungry, wouldn’t you agree?”

“Definitely.”

They smiled at each other, but the moment was ruined when Alistair placed a hand on both their shoulders.

“Now this is what I want to see. Tell me, are women this friendly when they share beds? I’d be willing to watch if you showed me.”

The other male roared with laughter, and Eleana curled back her lip in disgust.

Eleana didn’t regret her brief time with Alistair, he was far less cocky before he rose in ranks in the Elite. Since then, he had been insufferable, and that was one of the main reasons their tryst hadn’t lasted. That, and she was a young fifteen-year-old and he was older than her mother.

“Oh Alistair, if only women had as little self-respect. I don’t know what’s smaller, my tolerance for your behaviour or your dick. Both are rather miniscule.” She wanted to hiss it at him, but she kept her poise because she knew delivering it like that would have a harder blow.

The women had gathered behind Eleana and the female she had just conversed with. You could tell from their weary faces that they were just here to rest in between sessions, and that the males had been bothering them for a while.

“Why are you even here?” Eleana asked Alistair. “The Elite have been summoned and sanctioned.”

“We’re taking it in twelve hour shifts. Weirdly enough, not once did I see Kaden there. You putting it up Felix too? Why else would you have gotten first row so quickly? Must be wondrous in bed.” Alistair winked suggestively at Kaden.

Kaden didn’t blush or falter. He remained as he was, not deigning to respond.

“Leave, Alistair. Nobody wants you or your _friend_ here. Just let them eat. Not everything has to be about conquests.”

One of the women behind her squeaked as the other male skirted around the group to pinch her behind. She hit him away, but her fighting skills were inconsequential compared to his. The females had trained to be assets in the air, not on the ground – something her parents had been battling tooth and nail to change for a century.

“Stop it.” Eleana thrust out her darkness and tied his arms with it. He grunted and tried to escape, but it was futile.

“It is their duty to us. We men keep them safe while they raise the children. It is the least they can do.” The shackled man sneered.

“What they do with their body is no _duty_ , and is entirely up to them. I suggest you leave immediately.”

“They don’t have to want it for us to take it.” He remarked, a revolting smile on his face.

Eleana was flabbergasted. Did this man just insinuate that he had the right to rape a woman?

Maybe she could have controlled herself if he had just been an ass, but that – _that_ – she didn’t need her magic at full strength to punish him.

“Draw your swords.” She nodded at the females to step back, and with fear in their eyes from years of being unjustly preyed upon by men, they did. They were a young unit, still trying to find their way in a sexist society, and Eleana couldn’t fault them for their feelings. They were not weak.

Alistair and his crony laughed. “Really, Eleana? You’re going to take us both on? As fun as that sounds, I’m not in the mood.”

“Neither were they when you decided to think with your dick instead of your mind. Draw your swords, or I’ll fight you without them.”

Alistair snorted but they did as she asked. Alistair seemed fine, but nerves had started to wind their way into the other one who she had let free of her magic. She didn’t need her darkness to beat them without mercy.  

Alistair went to say something else, but before he could she kicked him square in the chest, so hard that he faltered back. She followed her kick by shoving the hilt of her sword in the temple to the male on her left. He blocked it, but that only gave her enough momentum to step forward and elbow him so hard in the nose the bone cracked. She then quickly, but with much ferocity, punched him in the throat.

He snarled at her, but she sidestepped his oncoming punches. Alistair approached her from behind, so she tucked the next swing from the male, turning slightly on her heel so she could pinch Alistair’s thigh. Her fingers clenched so hard that even through his pants his flesh tore.

He gasped in pain, but she didn’t stop there. She swung a hard uppercut into Alistair’s jaw, and then slashed her sword at the male. There was a satisfying _swish_ as her Illyrian blade slashed through his shirt and left a bloody cut across his stomach. If she had angled her sword even a little more, she would have gutted him. She would give no killing blows today though. She would only use enough severity to teach them a lesson. She was a woman, and she was strong and proud and no male would ever effect that.

The male backed off in surrender, raising his arms and dropping his blade. Crimson blood was flowing freely down his torso, and he probably needed to seek urgent medical care. If only Eleana cared enough to summon a healer.

At the sight of his friend backing off, Alistair did the same, making a clapping noise that in training meant your opponent was tapping out.

“Piss off.” Eleana barked.

The two did as they were told, and skulked away.

Eleana smiled at their retreating backs and turned back to the females. “I’m sorry to disturb yo-”

“Who taught you to fight like that?” One asked with nothing but awe in her tone.

“Mostly my cousin, Felix.”

Their faces slightly dropped at her answer, and she wondered why.

“Oh. We were hoping it might be someone who could teach us. Felix Warbringer though… I could never approach him. He’s too,” she waved her hand, “superior.”

“That’s not the case at all.” Kaden stepped up beside her, but a respectful distance away. “Felix would welcome you if you asked for extra training. He would do all in his power to ensure you had the best possible.”

“One of those males was Alistair, is he not in the Elite?” Another woman asked. It was a valid question. How could you respect a commander whose soldiers treated people like that?

“Alistair has already been demoted.” Kaden answered her. “Not just that, but Felix has the upmost respect for women and their value in the camp. I doubt Felix was aware of Alistair’s attitude, and when he finds out justice with be duly served.”

She looked at him sceptically.

“Tomorrow Felix is set to rearrange the Elite from the outcome of yesterday’s events. You should approach him afterwards. Tell him I sent you and what you want. If he can’t help you, he will do everything in his power to find someone that will. I promise.” Eleana suggested.

The women looked at each other, a smile beginning to grow on all their faces.

They agreed, and Eleana said her goodbyes before leaving them. As her and Kaden started walking again, he gave her more of the funny looks from before. She was about to demand answers, but first he said, “Eleana, can I talk to you in private?”

She cocked her head. “We’re in a market. Maybe we can go to your tent? I don’t know anywhere else that would offer privacy.”

“I do.”

_____

He winnowed them to a field opening in the forest. Nearby was rushing waterfall, a large lake and stream rushing off it. The trees were all willows, and the grass hadn’t yet dried from the harsh summer heat. Eleana smiled at the sound of nearby birds and insects, and breathed in deeply the fresh, unstained air.

“How did you find this place?” Eleana kicked off her boots and socks so she could wiggle her toes in the soft grass.

“This is where Felix taught me to swim.”

“I didn’t know Felix did that.”

He shrugged like it was no big deal, and then turned his back on her.

Eleana thought he was about to say what he had been holding in all day, so she let him stand while she sat and combed her hands through the grass.

And then,

_And then_ ,

He turned so quickly his wings blew a gust of air in their wake and knelt in front of her. His hands cradled her face, and he pressed a gentle kiss to her lips.

He _kissed_ her.

So slowly, so tenderly it was like they had all the time in the world. The kind of kiss he would’ve given her if he had been raised knowing how to love, the kind of kiss that was so filled with passion it made her heart ache. The kind of kiss that made her shed a tear, because he knew, very well, that if he kissed her it meant that she was wholly his, and he was hers in return.

He pulled away, but only far enough to rest his forehead against hers. He was panting slightly, and his hands were shaky on her face.

“Kaden?”

“I already knew it, but then you stood up for those girls, and I knew I needed you more than this. That I couldn’t bear it if I lost you just because I was impulsive with my magic or reckless with my feelings. Or if you moved on and I never got a chance to tell you how I felt, and tell you how _stupid_ I’ve been when it comes to you. I was so worried – so worried about what might happen to you if you were with me. But Cauldron have mercy, you can defend yourself. You don’t need me doing it for you.”

He pressed his lips against hers again, and then made due with kissing away the tears on her face.

“I’m not sure what you mean.” She said slowly. She wanted to hear him say it, needed to know he wasn’t going to change his mind.

“What I’m saying is that I love you too, and I can’t imagine facing this ruthless earth without you beside me. Can’t live without your darkness, and your light, and your love. _I love you_ , Eleana, and I will show you until the end of my days how eternally grateful I am the Mother gifted me with you. I am grateful for every single moment in my life if it means that I ended up here with you.”

She was still, and she was in disbelief. Was this real? Or was this the most horrific nightmare she’d ever have? Would she wake up and no longer have him?

She wrapped her arm around his neck, but didn’t kiss his lips. Instead, she nipped at his neck and earlobe, a gentle rumble letting loose from her throat. “Show me,” she purred in his ear.

He obliged.

He put his hands under her thighs and hitched them forward, making her lay on her back. She giggled at his touch, her legs now wrapped around his waist while he loomed over her. He folded his arms across his body and slowly took off his shirt, knowing she would enjoy the view. He chucked it away, and she let her hands wander free across all the dips and curves on his muscled abdomen. She leant forward, and kissed the skin just below his belly button, sucking until she left a small bruise in her wake.

When she was satisfied with her work, she dismissed her wings so she could take off her clothes easier. She went to get her shirt off, but stopped as he grabbed her wrists. “I’ll do it.” His voice was gruff, and he stared at her like he was going to devour her whole.

She nodded and let her arms fall. He disrobed her slowly, letting his fingers skim her body as he took in her appearance. When it came to her pants, her heaving chest completely bare, he let his fingers wander and graze sinfully over her core, but never quite hard enough to be anything but teasing. She squirmed on the ground, not satisfied with only seeing his torso.

“I need more of you,” she whispered.

“You can have it all.” He was still on his knees in front of her, and deftly removed his pants. She could already see his was straining, but as his length sprang free from its constraints her heartbeat thundered. Oral sex was not something she enjoyed giving before she met Kaden, but there was something about knowing that she would pleasuring him, and only him, unselfishly, that made her mouth water at the sight of him.

Her hand idly started stroking him, and his eyes rolled back in pleasure and he emitted a low, wonderful noise from his throat. She started taking him in: the wonderfully broad shoulders, the wavy blonde hair, the strong jaw line, his powerful thighs. And was that his tattoo? She knew of its existence, he had told her as much, but he had never let her see it. It was inked on the exact place she had bitten him that night in the stable, and it had gotten infected as soon as he’d had the tattoo done.

She continued her work on him with one hand and moved closer to see it. The puncture marks from her teeth had scarred, and were surrounding the tattoo like a border. The tattoo itself was a lovely rose that colours ranged from black to red.

Dark Rose – the name he had appointed her with their first night together.

“Ah, yes, that.” He cleared his throat and she could see a blush blooming on his neck and chest.

She moved so she was on her knees in front of him, and stopped her stroking so she could cradle his face in her hands. “I love you.” She kissed him.

“I love you too,” he moaned against her lips. “I’m sorry I took so long to realise. But _fuck_ I love you.”

“I would’ve waited a century for you, Kaden. An eternity.”

He kissed her again, and then gently pushed her back so she was flush against the grass. “Bring back your wings.” He murmured.  

She did as he told, and stretched them out beside her. He looked at them ravenously, and wasted no time in hitching her legs over his shoulders and thrusting into her.

She was soaked for him, but the sudden sensation was still like a bolt through her. She cried out, not caring how much noise she made as he pulled in and out of her. He was quick with his thrusts and had his hands around her calves as he held her legs up. One of her hands was braced behind her head, tearing up the ground in an attempt to grab something, while her other hand deftly started to work the bundle of nerves at her core. It was not the first time her fingers had strayed at the thought of the male in front of her, but this was the first time she could actually watch him worshipping her while she touched herself.

Between the stimulation inside her and her fingers, it was only two minutes before her walls were clenching around him and she was screaming his name. He moved her legs off his shoulders and back around his body. He came forward and smothered her screams of pleasure with a rough kiss, his cock still moving inside her.

“Today is all about you.” He nipped at her jaw. “Whatever you want it yours.”

“I want you.” She breathed.

“How do you want me?” He removed himself from her completely and she whimpered at the loss of his warmth. “Do you want me like this?” He kissed down her chest, taking his time when he came to her peaked nipples. He teased them with his teeth, licking over the small hurts whenever he switched sides. “Or do you want me like this?” He kissed further down her stomach, taking care to leave love marks behind. She loved how he was marking her – wanted to have the marks on her body to prove this was real. “Or is this better?” Her back arched and she choked on a gasp as his tongue took a single swipe up her core, smoothing from her entrance and ending with a kiss to the skin just above her clitoris.

“I want you – I want you to um, _Oh Kaden_.” Her breathing was heavy and she fisted his hair with her hands.

“How about that last one?” He dove back into her, feasting on her. He unwrapped her legs from around him, all the while drowning in her. He moved her legs apart so she was spread wide before him, and as he swiped up her again his fingers prodded at her entrance. Her wings tingled with the sensation, and she found herself moving them against the grass to release some of the tension in them. They were begging to be touched, and if she ever regained back the ability to speak real words she was ask Kaden to touch her there.

Her legs were quaking, unable to control her body’s movements. Kaden knew _exactly_ what to do with his tongue. And his fingers… her body curled every time they did.

“Do I taste good?” She joked just before her body convulsed again.

He lifted his head away from her and smirked. He moved up her body, his movements predatory like he was about to eat her alive, and gave her a messy, open-mouthed kiss, his tongue tickling the roof of her mouth and brushing against her own. She could taste her juices on him, and was not repelled by the flavour. Kaden certainly enjoyed it. He kissed her jaw, and then growled lowly in her ear, “Get on your back. I can tell from a mile away you want me to focus on your wings.”

She happily did so, stretching herself out so her ass was in the air. She turned her head to him, and he had a smirk plastered on his face. She stuck her behind out more, teasing him, and drew in a deep breath as he lightly spanked her.

“We’ll get to that later.” He purred. He licked then kissed the red mark on her, Eleana squirming in delight.

She laid flat and rested her head on her arms.

Firstly, he ran a single finger along the base of her wings, and then followed it immediately with his tongue. As he explored every crevice of them with his fingers, he made note of where she moaned the most so that’s where his mouth could go next.  

Eleana had never found completion from just her wings being caressed, had never let a male touch them the way Kaden was, but in a few short but very, very agonizing minutes, her body was shuddering as she climaxed again. She had to bite her arm to refrain from screaming his name, but he reached around and pulled her mouth free – wanting to hear his name as she called it from her lips.

Bless whoever decided multiple orgasms should be possible – whoever gifted them to the holy female body.  

Kaden stopped playing with her wings there, and Eleana was dismayed that he hadn’t come yet, not even _once_.

She turned over again and beckoned him forward. He braced himself over her casually, content to take his time. When he kissed her next, it wasn’t rough. There was no clashing of teeth or wrestling of tongues. It was still passionate, but slow-burningly. He was not hurried with her, and as he kissed her he caressed her cheeks with the pads of his thumbs.

“Kaden?” Eleana said as he worked his way down her neck.

“Mm?”

“Will you still love me tomorrow?”

He stilled at her words, and looked her in the eye as he said, “I will love you for the rest of my immortal days, and then again as I brace the Other Side while I wait for you to join me. I will love you until Velaris is nothing but ancient ruins in a world where the name Prythian is a myth, until the Wars are nothing but stories in the expanse of time. _I love you_ , Eleana. I’m sorry I kept you waiting, but I needed time to find out who I was before I could commit to you. There is still so much I have to work on, but it would be my honour if you were at my side while I did.”

She wrapped her arms around him and clutched her to him in a hug. He buried his face in the crook of her neck, and breathed in her scent. The scent that was now marvellously entwined with his own.

The blasting heat of the sun rained down on them, and they were both becoming slick with sweat. Neither minded though, not if it meant they were close together. Eleana took off one of the many glamours on her magic, and let the light simmering under her skin shine the way it had been begging to since the first throb of her core caused by Kaden tasting her.

He started to kiss her skin again, making his intentions of feasting on her clear as the sky, but Eleana stopped him.

“Are you tired? We can just lie here, I’m happy if you are.” He rested his head on her stomach. He was lying comfortably between her legs, and looked awfully good, and cocky, while doing it.

“That’s not it.”

He looked up at her with his onyx eyes. That look alone made her core start to glisten again, and she knew it would take but one touch from his mouth to be screaming again.

She fingered his hair, lazily pushing it back and forth. “I want you to take me as hard as you can, until you’re roaring my name loud enough for the whole court to know you’ve claimed me. I want you to unleash yourself on me, and I don’t want you to stop until I’m a whimpering mess and you’re completely and utterly satisfied. Do you understand?”

His eyes were alight at his command, and he leant back until he was on his knees before her.

“As hard as I can? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“ _Destroy_ me, Kaden.”

She could see goose bumps start to line his flesh, and saw his throat bobble as he took in her words.

“Okay. On your knees, then.” He watched her she did what he said. She turned to face away from him and settles on her elbows on knees, a lovely arc in her back from where she presented her behind to him.

His hands rested on her behind, and he leaned over and kiss the base of her spine. The anticipation was killing her, and she shifted in suspense.

She wasn’t expecting him to lower his lips to her again, but let out a loud moan of pleasure as he did. He went on for what seemed like eternity, but eventually replaced his mouth with his quick fingers. His lips didn’t stray far though, but moved to kiss the surrounding parts of her body. He was kissing her behind when suddenly, without warning, he bit her ass hard enough to draw blood.

The feel of his teeth in her flesh made her body ache with pleasure, and her moan was pure animalistic fae.

He didn’t give her a chance to recover when he sheathed himself in her, rocking her body forward and making her breasts bob. She braced herself on one arm and used the other to kneed herself, eyes fluttering shut at the feel of his mighty length inside her.

Kaden snapped his hips back and forth and he reached a hand forward to tangle itself in her hair and pull it. It meant she wasn’t rocking as much, and her throat was delightfully bared, and the feeling of him holding her in place like that was incomparable.

He groaned her name as his tempo became faster, and his prayers of her name matched her cries of his.  The hand that wasn’t ravelled in her hair was roaming her body, and came to rest on her exposed second hole. That area of her body had remained untouched by a man, but her curiosity had her thrilled at the prospect of him entering there too. He stopped his thrusting for a few seconds, but only long enough to get his wandering finger slick with her juices, commencing again as soon as he deemed his fingers wet enough. It didn’t take long; her body was rushing for him. His pace was slower this time, and as he played around her other hole she squeaked in glory. Then unrushed and without hesitance, he pushed a single finger inside her.

She gasped at the sensation of him filling her two ways, and her breathing became heavy as he moved his finger in time with his member. The feeling was… a new one, to say the least, but not unpleasant. There was just something about her being so _full_ of him, that made her core ache.

His pace became quick again, and he growled with pleasure. Eleana was panting beneath him, begging him to go faster, and harder, and to _consume_ her.

Between his pounding and his fingers, she was a trembling mess. She was so weak from fulfilment she could barely hold herself up. Her body was relishing in it, and her head hung low as she yearned and simpered for more. Kaden let her hair go, instead holding her hips so they aligned perfectly with his. His progress became slower, and from his twitching in her she could tell we was close to completion.  

She was close to a third, or was it fourth, fifth orgasm? She’d lost count, when he pulled out completely when they were both on the precipice. She involuntarily whined at the loss of contact, and let out a surprised _‘Oh!’_ when he flipped her over again so she was sprawled on her back. He lowered into her without explanation, this time more gentle and tender than anything else from the day.

He didn’t need to explain it to her, because she could see the reasoning written on his face, and felt it mirrored in her heart.

Kaden wanted to look at her when he came, wanted to see the way her mouth uplifted slightly before turning into an uncontrollable smile as little sounds escaped her throat as she climaxed. And she wanted to see him, her beautiful mate, as he roared with ecstasy when he found utter completion.

_____

Kaden rubbed at Eleana’s back, laughing at the green grass stains that covered her skin. Before, he had been too distracted to notice it, but oh, was it quite the sight. They had decided to swim in the small lake to cool themselves down, and Eleana had started to get uncomfortable from the sticky feeling on her back.

After they had made love in the water, her legs around his waist as she rested their cheeks together and rode him, they decided they should also clean off. It was clear what they had been doing, and Eleana didn’t want to go anywhere near her family smelling of sex.

Kaden thought that was fair enough.

“How’s it looking back there?” Eleana asked him.

He lightly pinched her thigh. “Looks great to me.”

“I meant my back.” She snorted. She bobbed down in the lake and swam away from him and closer to the waterfall, only her head above the water. This place would always be an oasis for him now, and never would he forget what they had done here today.

“I guess this makes you my lover.” She grinned.

“I’ll be anything you want.” He called to her.

She laughed and ducked under the water. She would come up again eventually, she could stay under there for hours between her water and wind magic. The first time she had done it she was under for five minutes, and Kaden freaked out. She’d apologized, but also laughed at his reaction.

He swam to the edge of the water and hitched himself up on a rock that jutted out over its surface. His legs were still in the calm rush, but his body was now fully exposed to the mercy of the late midday sun. He closed his eyes and basked in it.

He heard scampering from behind him, but wasn’t fazed. You couldn’t go to the forest and expect to not see any animals.

Eleana popped up again, and he waved at her. The smile she gave him in return was so full of intimacy and adoration that Kaden mentally kicked himself for not biting the dust sooner to just be with her – regardless of any consequences. The last few hours with her had been full of such joy, and the thought of him having that for all conceivable time to come… It was a happiness he never expected to have.

“Hey, Kaden! Guess what?” She shouted.

“What?”

“I love you!” She sang to him.

He splashed water at her. “I love you too. Now come sit with me.”

She glided over to him, and settled herself between his legs but still in the water. She rested her head on his knee and closed her eyes. She was still very tired, and would hopefully sleep well enough tonight that no nightmares plagued her.

The rustling in the trees became louder, and Kaden glanced that way to see an inhuman, weathered hand snap back into the underbrush, a present left behind. Kaden smiled to himself – the creatures of this forest really couldn’t help themselves, could they?

He reached backwards to get what was left behind, Eleana lifting her head at the movement.

“What is it?”

“You’ve received another gift, my lady.” He handed her the two gifts.

They were strange rings, both black stone with no ornamentation. They could’ve been necklaces, but they looked more like collars than jewellery.

Eleana weighed them in her hands, slight frown on her face. “Do these feel strange to you?”

She gave them back to him to inspect, and he had to agree with her. He couldn’t name the feeling, but now that he was centring his attention on it he couldn’t help the sick feeling that overcame him. He also noted that the stone, although black, was a different one than usual.

“I think we should leave.” Eleana said under her breath. She grabbed his hands and winnowed them back to where they had abandoned their clothes. They threw them on and disappeared back to camp.

Leaving the collars behind.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	21. Chapter 21

Kaden was breathing heavily by the end of training; all the Elite were. Felix had really put them through the rounds, and in the middle of the night too. To believe that it had only been eight hours since he and Eleana had been together… It was only eight hours, and it was the best of his life. Felix had called the Elite for training that night though, which meant he hadn’t been able to find her since they’ separated and all he wanted to do was hunt her down and bury himself in her again, hopefully making her moan like he had all afternoon.

“You look cheery.” Felix said as he approached him. The Elite were beginning to disperse, so it was just Felix and Kaden lingering on the training field. Kaden hadn’t had the chance to tell Felix about what happened yet, but he was excited to.

“That would be because I’m feeling awfully cheery.” Kaden replied.

“I feel like no session is good enough to put that look on your face. What’s going on?” Felix was grinning as he removed the armour he was wearing and took off all his various weapons. “And how is your magic feeling? Still burnt out?”

“It’s getting better, but I’m not too worried. I don’t think I’ll have to do that again any time soon, hopefully ever.” Kaden started to help Felix pack up all the stuff he’s laid out for the Elite to do, and everyone else had scattered back to their homes to sleep.

“So why are you so chirpy? I’m glad one of us is.” Felix next smile was a forced one, and now that Kaden had a hint of how his friend was really feeling, he couldn’t see anything other than the pain in his eyes.

Kaden decided his news could wait. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry.” Felix looked slightly alarmed. “I shouldn’t have said that. Tell me about you, what happened after you left with Laya?”

“What happened when you met Theodosia?” Kaden countered.

Felix stopped in his tracks, and Kaden could see him clenching his jaw. “It doesn’t matter. I want to hear about what you did, bask in the glory that is Kaden.” Felix was grinning again, his moods swinging between miserable and elated in seconds.

The night session with the Elite had been a particularly brutal one – Felix claimed that they needed to be able to do anything despite being tired or hungry. Kaden realised that maybe Felix just really needed take his frustrations out on something in the only way he knew how.

“If I tell you, you have to promise that we’ll have a drink at yours afterwards and we’ll sort out whatever is happening.”

“You’re only making me more intrigued by being so mysterious.” Felix drawled. “Deal. Now what’s put that kick in your step?” Felix continued to disarm himself.

“Eleana and I are together. Now tell me about you.”

Felix snorted in shock and put a hand over his heart. “You can’t just drop news like that and expect the conversation to move on! I was expecting you to say something along the lines of ‘today I stared longingly at Eleana and she didn’t even notice and it was so great can’t wait to go wallow in my own pity some more because we’re not together even though we totally can be’. And now you are! You’re together! _Kaden_!” Felix engulfed him in a hug. “I’m so happy for you!”

Kaden was glad there was now a genuine smile on his friend’s face, and that he had someone to share the wonderful news with. “There’s not much more to say. I took her to that little lake you showed me to talk, and we ended up, uh, _talking_ for a long time. I told her how I actually feel.”

Felix rolled his eyes. “I hope you enjoyed all your _talking_.”

“Definitely. I love t _alking_. I even _talked_ in that way you told me some females might secretly like.”

“Okay I’m a bit confused now. You mean to tell me you put something up her bu-”

“And then we went swimming. Now you talk about your day.” Kaden picked up a bag of weapons, and Felix shouldered one too. Together, they started walking towards his home.

“I don’t usually _talk_ in front of others.” Felix winked.

“Oh ha ha.” Kaden said sarcastically. “We both know your favourite way to _talk_ is with as many people as you can. Now hurry along, we don’t have all day.”

“Theodosia’s beautiful, she really is. She’ll look a lot like Quathryn when she grows.”

“And? I don’t think it was Thea’s cuteness that has made you feel down.”

Felix shrugged. “My parents and I fought, and then they left for Velaris. I don’t know when they’ll be back.”

“What did you fight about?” Kaden stopped walking and turned to Felix. He was exhausted, and Felix clearly was too. But whatever they’d fought about was clearly weighing heavily on his friend, and Kaden doubted he’d get even a wink while worrying about him.

“It doesn’t matter; it is what it is.” Felix didn’t stop.

“It matters, Felix. So just tell me.” Kaden hurried after him, jogging to get back to his side.

Felix abruptly turned and stopped in front of Kaden, blocking his path. “So now that you’re with Eleana will you move out of that tent? Your room is still available, and Laya can stay anytime she wants.”

Kaden sighed quietly at Felix’s attempt to change the subject. “No, Felix. For the last time, I’m not going to move in with you. I don’t know why you keep insisting. I have my tent, which I am perfectly happy with, and if I want more than that I can stay in Velaris.”

Felix’s face fell ever so slightly, and he backed off from Kaden. “Whatever. I’m going home.” Felix, in a noticeably Archeron fashion, winnowed away.

Kaden was not having any of that shit. Felix, although the most lovable person Kaden knew, was as emotionally stunted as a cactus sometimes. If Kaden didn’t speak to him now then Felix’s rage would fester and turn into insecurities and misery – neither things he wanted for his friend. More so, Kaden worried about him. A lot. Before they had separated, Eleana had mentioned that she feared the effect Theodosia would have on Felix. Kaden took every word she said as fact, and if she was scared enough to confide in him then that was cause enough for him to demand Felix speak to him.

Kaden made it to the house and ran into the door. _Physically ran_ into it, as it refused to open.

“Really?” Kaden shouted. “You’re going to magic me out? Open the bloody door you ass!”

This was not how he had planned to spend his night, or more accurately, the few hours before the sun rose.  He had planned to sneak into Eleana’s room, maybe make them some breakfast, maybe whisk her away to Velaris so he could fuck her in his soundproof room. Maybe he would just cuddle her, and chase away her nightmares. No matter what he was going to do, it didn’t include being tempted to break into his best-friend’s house so they could have a forced heart to heart chat.

Kaden banged on the door again, and was surprised to see that there was no light at all coming from the house, nor any sounds. Against his better judgement and at the risk of Eleana and Felix’s wrath, he touched his burnt magic just long enough to see if he could sense any life in the house. It zipped through each room and not a single person was home.

Great. Just fantastic. It would take more magic than he had to track Felix down, something the older Illyrian likely knew.

Kaden slumped against the door and let himself slide to the ground. He recapped his own day: he connected the soul of his best friend’s sister back to her body, burnt out his magic, had wild sex with the woman of his dreams and confessed his undying love for her, trained with the Elite until his bones were nothing but jelly and pissed off said best friend about something he was unaware of.

This had been one hell of a day. Would he be judged if he fell asleep leaning against a door? He guessed yes, but that didn’t stop him from closing his eyes. He would just rest them while he waited for Felix to come back.

While he was waiting, he felt a piece of paper slip into his hand. Perplexed, he groggily opened it and gave it a read.

_I was trying to think of different ways to tell you I love you._

It was unmistakably Eleana’s writing.

_And I couldn’t think of a way to say it better. So just as a reminder, I love you I love you I love you. I’ll see you again in the morning._

_Completely and utterly yours,_

_Eleana._

He couldn’t contain the smile that crossed his face, so wide and insistent that it made his cheeks ache. No matter what happened tonight he still had this, had _her_.

Felix would come back in his own time, but right now there was nothing Kaden could do for him. If he had his magic it would be a different story, but while he was still barely in grasp of it there was another Archeron he could make very happy.

He got up, the kick from before back in his step, and shot into the sky as he made his way to the love of his life.

____

 

Eleana couldn’t sleep – not an unusual event. She had long ago kicked off her blankets from the heat, and since then she’d tossed and turned. After leaving Kaden, she’d come home to find her parents cuddled on the couch waiting for her. They’d all had dinner and then ice-cream together before retiring to their rooms. And since then, all she could think about was her mate, and her body had been writhing with want ever since.

She was on the verge of binging on chocolate and books when she heard a slight tapping at her (finally repaired) window. The last noise in her room had been the sound of her pen scraping against the paper as she wrote Kaden a love note, something she definitely wanted to make a tradition.

She got up from her bed to inspect the noise, expecting to have to shoo away birds or drunk Illyrians. She pulled the glass up and leaned out, a happy gasp escaping her at the sight she was met with. Standing with a grin on his face and a hand full of pebbles was Kaden, his leathers still on and his gorgeous hair ruffled.

“What are you doing here?” She whispered down to him.

“Oh Lady Eleana, my love, I have come to confess my adoration for thee-”

She shushed him quickly with a gesture over her mouth but a smile on her lips. “You’ll wake my parents, and you really don’t want my father catching you.”

“Why ever so fair maiden?” He batted his eyelashes at her.

“You think you’re the first Illyrian to profess his love for me? The last was interrogated by half the High Lords in Prythian.”

Kaden’s face dropped. “Are you serious?” he hissed.

Eleana sat on her window hill with her legs hanging over the side, gently knocking against the stone of her house. She nodded down at him. “Mhm. There was my father, that’s one, Tarquin, he’s always loved me the best, Uncle Lucien, who can be very scary when he wants to be, Glaslane, he’s _very_ protective, Helion, who’s quite charming but probably the scariest of the bunch, and Kallias and Thesan came just to watch. Hey, I guess that means all the High Lords where there.”

Eleana had never seen the kind of fear that was on Kaden’s face before, and it made her giggle.

“I can’t tell if you’re joking.” He choked.

“No need to fret my love, I was young and I’m sure they all got it out of their system then.”

“How old were you?” he asked gravely.

Eleana hopped out her window and spread her wings to glide to the ground. She landed elegantly in front of him and immediately wrapped her arms around his neck to bring him close. “It was a pretty serious relationship. His name was Barney and we met at tutoring. He was an attractive older man, you know? I was ten, and he was twelve and we held hands and everything-”

“Why must you tease me like this?” He rolled his eyes at her antics.

“I’m serious! I had the biggest crush on him, and there was this party all the High Lords and Ladies were attending and I begged my mother and father to let him come. He did, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s scarred for life and traumatized to this day.” She kissed his forehead. “The funny thing is though that he was fine right up until my protective, seventeen-year-old cousin Felix interrogated him. I was so mad, didn’t talk to him for weeks because of it.” She smoothed back his hair, and shivered as he placed his hands on her waist.

Kaden looked down at her with his depthless black eyes. “All I want to do right now is kiss you until the sun rises.” He leant down and kissed her softly. “But all I can think about right now is Felix.”

Eleana noted the taste of his lips on her tongue and his hands tight on her body. “Felix?” It was her cousin he was thinking about right now?

Kaden let go of her but trailed his fingers down her arms to link their hands. “We fought today, and I feel sick to my stomach about it.” He started walking away from her house, taking her along with him. She was still in her pyjamas, shorts and an old t-shirt, but she shrugged and went along anyway. She was also intrigued by the fight Kaden had with Felix. Those two were like an old married couple, she didn’t know if what they constituted as an argument was an actual fight.

“What happened?”

“I don’t even know.” He threw one arm up into the air.  “We were talking about me and you and him and Thea and suddenly he just stormed off. Emotional winnowing should be banned by the way.”

“Tell me exactly what he said.” Eleana could see that Kaden was leading them in the direction of his tent and was happy she’d be able to sit or lie down.

“He told me about how he’d had a fight with his parents, but didn’t want to talk about it because he wanted to talk about us instead. By the way, he’s thrilled we’re together.” Kaden took a tired breath. “He asked me to move in and I said no and that’s when he got mad. But I don’t understand why! He asks me every other day and I always say no. Why now is he getting upset about it? That’s the only conceivable thing I can think he’d be pissy over.”

They completed the short walk to his tent. Kaden looked at it and then her, and started walking away. She didn’t need him to say he was embarrassed for her to be there for her to understand that was the reason he was suddenly changing direction. So she let go of his hand and let him walk off, and then proceeded to crawl into the open space to lie flat on her back, patiently waiting for him to join her.  

He came back eventually and gave her an _are you serious_ look.

She grinned at him and he caved. He collapsed next to her and let her arrange herself until she was comfortable, half on top of him with her face in the crook of his neck.

“What did you say to him exactly when you said no?” She questioned.

“I said I was happy with my tent, and if I ever wanted to upgrade I had my room in Velaris.”

Eleana groaned as soon as he finished his sentence. Of course Felix would be mad about that, or, not mad per se, but devastated.

“Do you know what’s going on? Because I still don’t.” He sighed.

“I think Felix believes that at some point we’re all going to leave him. As far as I know Thea and Quathryn aren’t going to train here when they’re older, and Nesta and Cassian aren’t going to come back. I’m the heir to the Night Court, there was never any question about where I would end up. More than that, as much as I love flying, I consider myself more like a fae than an Illyrian, a point where Felix and I differ greatly. He’s already imagining a situation where our whole family is living their lives separate from him.”

Eleana straddled Kaden and sat up so she could talk to him easier. Her hands were braced on his chest, but she let her fingers whirl around and draw imaginary patterns. “You know you’re his best friend, and we both know that nothing can change that, but I think he believes that you’ll leave him too, and then he’ll be truly alone.” Her last few words were whispered, and met with a solemn silence.

“I would _never_.” Kaden’s voice broke.

“I know.”

“I said those things about leaving to go to Velaris. Can you find him? I need to explain.”

Eleana nodded, and as much as it pained her, got off Kaden and stood up, exiting his tent and waiting for him to join her. If Felix was distressed there’s only one place he would go. They walked hand in hand through the night, listening to the sounds of Illyrians waking up to prepare for dawn duty. Eleana walked slowly to compensate for the lagging Kaden, who had been awake for close to a full day. His steps were dragging and his face fallen and disconcertingly ashy, but that didn’t mean that every time he caught her staring at him the gleam in his eyes didn’t return. He would kiss her lips gently and smile, and they would continue on their way.

Eventually, they made it to the place where Felix was. They walked to the front door and made their way in. There was no need to knock in a place like this, not if you were Eleana or Kaden. Inside the familiar share house for bastards was nothing but the noise of the cook preparing breakfast for the children. Or so Eleana thought. As they walked down the hallway maids were carrying trays upon trays of steaming mugs filled with hot chocolate.

She knitted her eyebrows in confusion and followed the maids, and her heart tightened at the sight she found.

Inside the library was Felix on a chair with a worn book in his hands. All the young children had gathered around him on the floor in their dressing gowns and were listening raptly to every word he spoke. He was telling them the most fantastical stories with dragons and warriors, and he was so involved with what he was doing that he didn’t even notice Kaden or Eleana’s entrance.

They watched as the maids handed out the hot chocolate and smiled at the looks of wonder on the children’s faces. It was almost comical, the way this man born and bred to kill could entertain the younglings so well and innocently.

Kaden stepped behind Eleana and wrapped his arms around her, resting his weary head on her shoulder. Kaden and Felix could talk, but first, he wanted to hear the story too. At one point, Felix had looked up and seen Kaden and Eleana. He paused for a single second, and then continued as if he had just stopped for dramatic effect.

When Felix had finished, the children were still utterly enraptured. They wanted _just one more_ , but Felix made them all go back to their beds and told the hired staff to let them sleep in.

As the children were bustling out calling their thanks to Felix, the male himself approached them.

“Kaden you should be sleeping, and Eleana, if Rhys or Feyre find out you’ve snuck out-”

“I’m so sorry,” Kaden interrupted, “about what I said. I was being inconsiderate towards your feelings, and I should’ve known that implying I’d go to Velaris would hurt you.” Kaden disconnected himself from Eleana to stand in front of his best friend, his hands raised to settle on his shoulders. “Can we please just talk about what happened with Cassian and Nesta? You always listen to me, and I want to be that for you to but you have to give me the chance.”

“There’s nothing to talk about, not really. I guess I’m just sad.” Felix pulled away and walked towards the bay window to sit. Kaden followed, but Eleana watched and listened from a distance.

“Why?”

The two men sat and faced each other, and for the first time ever, Felix spoke about how he was truly feeling. It may have been the exhaustion that made him so open, or it could just be that he finally trusted someone enough to share that part of himself. Either way, Eleana felt more at rest than she had in months when he finally opened up about his issues with his parents. When he saw the Impeath, he hadn’t just seen them, he’d also seen and heard every fear he’d ever had concerning being their son – whether he was good enough, why they were so eager to replace him with another child, if he could ever live up to the Archeron name. Some he admitted were from his own unfounded insecurities, others he felt we valid from moments scattered throughout his childhood. His parents giving him to Azriel or Rhys for the day so they wouldn’t have to care for him while they tried for another child, which they started doing before Felix was even two years old. Eleana recollected her own memory from eight months ago, the time those Illyrians were killed and Felix was given the task to investigate. Felix had hugged Cass, and Cassian had said he was too old for that. Eleana had wondered at the time why Felix had flinched, but it now she say it with perfect clarity. More so, now that Felix’s family had officially decided to stay in Velaris, Felix felt stuck between wanting to train the Elite, lead armies and be a general like his father, and wanting to be there to see his sisters grow up.

These were things that were ingrained in Felix, and it would be a long time before that changed. But as the two males hugged in front of her, both with tears in their eyes, she could see that they were all willing to try their best to get there.


	22. Chapter 22

It liked watching them.

Had ever since the dark female had wandered into its space and roused its creatures, and then sent her father after them too. Silly girl. There was nothing for any fae to find once it was done with the sacred mountain.

It found the dark half breed quite intriguing. It liked to watch her sneak away with her golden mate, liked to sometimes picture itself as her when he pushed her against the tree and fucked her.

It watched the golden male as he struggled to find his mother with half hopes created from a single sentence uttered from the seer. _Son of Denora Ana._ It watched as he stared longingly at the dark girl even though she was already his.

It became furious when they would not take its gifts. Snarled and killed when they dismissed what it left for them.

It wanted her body, and it wanted it now. It would make another move soon, and when the soul bound pair was apart it would strike. But first, it would weaken them. It would tear them apart so its transition was easier.

When it was done, everything the dark girl and golden boy loved would be gone.

____

 

“What do you mean you’re leaving? I thought father was too busy with the investigation?” Eleana stood absolutely perplexed in front of her mother. There were three things that made her question what the fuck was going on. Firstly, her mother was clutching a travel bag and was claiming she was going to be visiting the High Lord for the next three days. Which left Eleana to her second big question, why was Feyre and Rhys, after all these months of dutifully watching their daughter, now just up and leaving with nothing but a few moments notice? And lastly, how could they afford the time away while the High Lord and Cassian were investigating the evidence of the creature attacks in Prythian?

It was not uncommon for Feyre to leave Eleana alone for short periods of time while she rekindled with Rhys, both parents felt as though she was old enough, and more importantly, mature enough to take care of herself at camp. But since the attacks on Eleana and Felix they hadn’t dared leave her, sometimes paranoid when she only went to training. So why now? What was going on?

“Your father bought us these passes at a spa in the Winter Court nearly a year ago - before everything happened. It was an early anniversary present and we felt that you were ready to be in the house on your own again.” Feyre smiled hopefully at Eleana.

Eleana, although very confused, nodded. “Of course. That makes perfect sense.” Her confusion must have read as hesitance to Feyre, as the High Lady carefully put her bag down and gave Eleana a tender hug.

“I will not go if you don’t want me too. I’d much rather spend my days here with you then at some pretentious spa anyway.” Feyre pressed a kiss to her forehead.

“No, that’s fine!” Over the past seven weeks, as Eleana and Kaden had explored their newfound relationship with one another, Eleana finally knew the pure, unabashed joys of sharing her life with her mate. They had their problems still, but being with Kaden was the best thing to ever happen to her. Eleana could not imagine the pain she would be in if circumstances meant that her and Kaden had to live their lives separately – the exact way it was for Eleana’s parents. Eleana felt a shameful selfishness as she thought of how maybe she did want her mother to stay. Wanted her to be there at night when she awoke crying from her relentless dreams, when all she needed was her father and her mother would summon him and he’d be there in a second. It made Eleana nervous to think that she wouldn’t have anyone there for her. But, and it was for the definite best, Eleana wanted her mother to spend the time with her mate she desperately needed.

“Maybe tonight we could have dinner with the children?” Feyre asked. “It’s been nearly a week since I’ve seen them.” Since Eleana had finally returned to the throng of training she used to have, Feyre had thrown herself back in to correcting the injustices towards women and bastard children. That meant that all the children that loved Eleana so much just because she was Feyre’s daughter got to spend some quality time with the High Lady again. Wondrously, Feyre had never managed to encounter Kaden while she was there, and Eleana suspected Felix had a great deal to do with it.

“No, wait, you should go.” Eleana pushed away from Feyre, picking up her bag and shoving it at her. “I’ll be fine here on my own, I’ll probably only be sleeping anyway.” A lie, even though Eleana had promised herself she would stop doing it. A plan had formed in her head, a thing to do that she only could in the absence of both her parents.

Feyre beamed at her and clutched the bag to her chest. “You’re sure?”

“Positive.”

“Summon me if you need anything, even if it’s something small, okay? I love you so much.” Feyre enveloped her in a hug again, and Eleana was glad that her parents would be spending some much-needed alone time together. There weren’t many things more intense than a mating bond and the love that came with it, and who was Eleana to take that away from her mother?

The giddiness in Feyre’s steps as she ran to winnow to her mate spoke of the fairy-tale love that lived with her parents every day, a love Eleana was going to hopefully achieve.

With her mother gone so suddenly, Eleana clambered to hopefully fix one of the major roadblocks in her and Kaden’s relationship. If she was going to be alone, she was going to take full advantage of it.

Although deliriously happy with Kaden, something had been in the way. And it wasn’t her problem, it was completely and utterly his. She had noticed as soon as he’d confessed his love for her that something was holding him back. It was the same thing as always: his heritage.  

They would be walking in the forest, talking and kissing, when someone would appear and he’d let go of her hand. She would watch him train with the Elite, and after when she’d try to approach him he would serve away and try to act casual. She didn’t think any of his acts were conscious ones. The only person he was free around was Felix. Eleana knew that he didn’t act like this because he was ashamed of her, he was ashamed of himself and his imaginary inadequacies.

Felix had noticed and asked her about it a few weeks ago, why he was like this if Eleana had convinced him of her love. Eleana told him a plain and simple truth, one most people did not understand.

Being in love, and having that love reciprocated, was not a magical cure all for your mental health.

Eleana felt carefree and safe with Kaden, yet she still had nightmares daily. Kaden undoubtedly knew her love for him, but that didn’t stop him from wondering if he was good enough for her.  

She would show him if it killed her how much his station did not matter at all. She knew it would take time to convince him, but she was willing to put in the effort. Kaden would for her, she already saw him doing it for Felix. She loved him so much, and she believed in that love enough to know that one day, no matter the obstacles they faced, his feelings would never be one of them.

With this in mind, she went to go find him. She yanked on the bond between them, the invisible line that connected them at all times. It had grown since they had been together, and sometimes the force of it shook her. It shocked her that Kaden hadn’t figured it out yet. Another thing Felix had asked her about – why she had not told Kaden of the bond.

Her answer was another simple one. She would never tell him.

He would come to the conclusion in his own time. With his feelings the way they were, Eleana knew that if she told him of the bond he would likely think her feelings had stemmed from some ingrained sense of obligation towards him, especially since she had known about it from the day they’d met. He would then begin to question himself in an unhealthy way, much like he did now but unpredictably worse, and she couldn’t do that.

He would know one day, and in the meantime, he would contribute their bond to her daemati abilities, and she was okay with that - truly.

She walked through the afternoon sun still in her training gear. She had just come back from a session with Alixia when she’d found her mother about to leave. She never bothered to change, especially if she knew she was going to see Kaden that night. There was nothing more satisfying than the male stripping her of her training gear before completely devouring her.

She waved her hellos to numerous Illyrians as she passed, but was focused on finding her mate. She had never been able to bring him to her home, and tonight that was going to change. She had made a new plan for the day, and she was going to stick to it. As she walked, she passed a store where you could hire Illyrians to run your errands for you. She went in and found a petite boy and gave him a list of instructions to follow that were essential for that night. She paid him generously and then was off.

Unsurprisingly, when she found Kaden he was with her cousin. They were acting like fools to entertain the crowd of children around them. Kaden had a boy on his shoulders who was wrestling with another resting on Felix’s. Felix and Kaden were egging them along, and Eleana laughed quietly at the sight. She stood back and let them wear themselves out. They were all gathered near the newly opened share-house, the old one so successful that Feyre had decided to bring in children from other camps as well. They all loved her mother, and it also meant that the two best-friends in front of her had an endless audience for their games. It was also an excellent excuse for Felix to procrastinate, which he was obviously doing now. Eleana knew he was meant to be in Velaris with Az tonight so they could go over some new findings concerning the creatures, but instead Felix was here. Whether it was because he didn’t want to leave camp and go to Velaris, or it was because he wanted to avoid Azriel, Eleana didn’t know. All she did know what that he was here, and – as much as she loved him – he better not interfere with her night.

When Felix’s boy had knocked Kaden’s off his shoulders, the match was deemed over. Many children yelled that they wanted it to be their turn next, but Felix smiled politely and gently let them down with a goodbye and promise that he would see them the next day.

Eleana approached them and clapped, praising their performance. “Well done, Felix!” she called jokingly.

“Why thank you, Heir. I have finally vanquished my greatest enemy, Sir Pines-A-Lot.”

“Sod off.” Kaden made a rather inappropriate gesture considering there were children watching. He came to her and whispered, “I pine for no-one, Lady Eleana. No-one but you.”

She leaned forward to kiss him, but he dodged her, pretending to be distracted by a sea of children making the same hand motion he had at Felix.

“You’ve created an army of monsters,” she told him.

“They were bound to find out about the different range of hand motions eventually.” He lowered his voice so that only she could hear. “If you have some spare time, there’s a few things with my hands that I’d like to show you.”

It baffled her how he could go between evading her kisses to making innuendos in such a short amount of time. She loved that about him. Mainly because his words made her insides warm with want. 

“That could be arranged.” She smirked at him. “I have a proposition for you.”

“And what might that be?”

“I have the house to myself for the next three days. Come spend time with me.” She wanted nothing more than to pull him to her, but she restrained herself. “We can wake up with each other.” If they were alone she would have run her hands down his chest while he played with her hair.

“After tonight I’m all yours.” He brushed his thumb on her cheek and turned to help Felix herd the children back into the house where they could be watched by other adults.

“After tonight?” She followed him and helped guide the children to their usual keepers. Around this time they usually had a group history lesson, or some other sort of group tutoring.

“I’m having dinner with Azriel and Morrigan. You are more than free to come, but I didn’t think you would enjoy it.”

He knew her well. Eleana still hadn’t reconciled with Azriel, and it was the longest she’d ever gone without speaking to her uncle. She was less angry now then she was before, mostly thanks to Kaden hearing her rant for hours on end.

She should get a hold of that boy she’d hired, there was no point setting up her plans for tonight if Kaden wasn’t going to be there. “Okay.” She nodded at him and turned to walk away. Sometimes she annoyed herself. Here she was, feeling dejected when she had no right to be because she couldn’t have the night she wanted when she didn’t even make sure that Kaden could’ve come in the first place.

“Where’s the High Lady?” He grabbed her hand and pressed a quick kiss to the back of it.

“She’s gone to spend some time with my father. They used to do this every month before the Colloden attack, and we’ve finally gotten to a place where we think it’ll be okay if I’m on my own.” She smiled sadly, and stared away from him. “Will you come by? I can give you a tour of my house, practically everyone has lived there. My father did with Cassian and Azriel when they were my age, and it was where Felix lived before he got his own place. My future cousins or siblings will probably live there, and it’s my second home. I would like to share it with you.”

Kaden glanced around, and seeing that there was no-one in the vicinity, took her into his arms. “I’ll leave Velaris around nine, and I’ll eat lightly so I can have dinner with you.” He rested his forehead on hers. “And tonight, we’ll fall asleep and I’ll be there when you wake up.”

“That sounds nice,” she whispered.

“What will you do in the meantime? You know if Mor and Azriel hadn’t summoned me I would be with you in a heartbeat.”

“Summoned?” It was an unusual word choice.

“They have news on my mother.”

Eleana was astonished. In the weeks since Elain had uttered the name _Denora Ana_ in one of her seer rambles, barely anything had come of it. Kaden and Azriel had tried their hardest to take the lead somewhere, but it was fruitless. None of Azriel’s spies, even the oldest ones, had ever heard the name uttered. His research in other courts had also turned up empty handed. Kaden had started to give up hope, his only solace coming from the diary Mor had managed to find. Eleana had scarcely seen it since the first night she’d read it, but when she had more recently, Kaden had tabbed his favourite pages, restored it as much as he could, and taken care of it as though it was the most precious thing in the world.

“ _Kaden_.” She was so glad to hear there might finally be some news.

“I’m trying not to become too hopeful.” The smile on his face told a whole other story.

She wrapped her arms around his neck. “Go now, and then come home to me.”

He chuckled lightly. “I’ll always come home to you.”

____

Kaden could still feel the remnants of Eleana’s kiss goodbye on his lips as he walked the familiar path to Azriel and Mor’s home. He came by often, but only today were his nerves puncturing him like tiny needles straight to his stomach. Cauldron bless him, he just wanted any information on where he came from, anything at all. It was clear now that his mother hadn’t been a local in Hewn City, and if he could just get a Court he was from, somewhere he might have more family, it was would be phenomenal.

He walked into the house and steered straight for the kitchen. Azriel was there cooking away, so he said hello as he sat atop the bench Az wasn’t using, pinching an apple to munch on.

“How are you?” Azriel asked as he stirred a pot of stew.

“Well. About tonight though, I know I was going to stay over but I have to go back to camp not long after nightfall. I might have entrée here and then head off. Is that alright?” Kaden didn’t want to put Azriel out, particularly since from the looks of it he had prepared a multiple course meal, but either way he would go to Eleana tonight.

“Mor will be disappointed, she misses you when you aren’t here. Is there a chance you could stay? If you have duty I can find a replacement,” Azriel offered.

“It’s not that. The High Lady has left for a few days, and Eleana wants me to come over for the night. She claims it’s so we can have a romantic evening, which I think is true, but I think she also doesn’t want to admit she doesn’t want to be alone while she’s still having dreams.”

Azriel stopped what he was doing to fully face Kaden. “Do you think you could handle her at night if something goes wrong?”

By something going wrong, Azriel meant Eleana’s night terrors being so bad she accidently hurts herself or someone else. That included spontaneous winnowing, screaming, crying, scratching, kicking, and a large number of other things she does when in that state. Of late, Eleana’s dreams, while still haunting her, no longer caused the destruction they did right after she was attacked. She seemed calmer, especially since she had been with Kaden, but he did not attribute her ascending health to himself. That all came from her own strength.

“I do,” he asserted.

“If something happens that you can’t control you have to summon me, okay? I’m not taking no for an answer. Even if you just suspect something might go badly you must call for Mor and I.”

“Oh shush.” Mor gallivanted into the room with a basket full of clean and folded laundry. She set it down on the table and greeted Kaden with a tight hug. She let him go and stepped back, but not before squeezing his cheeks. “The only protection Eleana needs is the tonic I brought for you both to use.”

Kaden’s face blazed with embarrassment. In a drawer of his bed, Mor had provided many different forms of protection for when he and Eleana were intimate. Morrigan had done this before the two were even together, and it mortified him that even then his feelings for Eleana were so obvious.

“And I suspect,” Mor continued, “that Eleana won’t be having many nightmares tonight, as to do that you’ll need to sleep. Something they’ll likely not get.”

Kaden groaned in humiliation.

“I’m not saying this to make you uncomfortable poppet, I’m being realistic. Safe sex is the best sex.”

“Stop Mor, I think he’s suffocating from embarrassment.” Azriel smirked.

“Can we please move on?” Kaden choked.

“Well, since you’re insisting on not staying, we may as well talk about your mother now.” Mor beckoned for him to come sit on the couch. They both did, Azriel turning off all the stoves so the food didn’t burn before joining them. Azriel and Mor sat at one side, holding each other’s hands, while Kaden sat on the other facing them.

Longing was evident on Kaden’s face as he looked at them, an expression that wasn’t shared.

“We haven’t found anything, son. We don’t want you to stop thinking of her, but we also don’t want you to linger on this when we might not ever find anything else.”

Kaden sat back at the blow from Azriel’s words. “N-nothing?” he stuttered.

“We’ll still try as much as we can!” Mor assured him. “We both have some more time now than before to look. Our days are free other than our obligations to Velaris, and we’ll spend as much time on this as you want us to.”

Kaden slumped. How much more could he ask from them? They had already spent countless time in this futile effort. “I… no. You should stop looking.”

“That’s not what we meant-”

“I know,” Kaden interrupted Mor. “It’s time that I do the work. I’ve been letting you take control, wasting your time on me, when this is something that I should be doing myself.”

“Kaden, you are not wasting our time.” Mor stood up and gripped Kaden’s chin to make him look her in the eyes. “I will gladly do this for you. I would gladly do anything. _We_ ,” she pointed at her and Azriel, “are your family. Do you understand? I know I can never fill the hole in you your mother’s absence has left, but Kaden I want to. I love you like you are my own, and I will protect you at any costs.”

It was a feeling Kaden had suspected Morrigan felt, but it was still strange to hear her say the words. But it felt wrong to him; he did not deserve her dedication.

“I spent so many years hating her for abandoning me – for not wanting me,” he confessed to them. “I don’t know how to react to your… profession, but I do know it’s time for me to take control of my past. I will forever be grateful and indebted to you both for all you have done for me, but you have other things to focus on now. You have a new niece to spoil, and I am certain that Felix and Eleana’s anger will not last much longer. And I know… I’ve heard the whisperings about me, that people don’t understand why I can’t comprehend or guess certain emotions in different situations.”

“I think you’re _perfect_ ,” Mor argued. Kaden moved her hand away from his face and instead clutched it in his.

“It’s true,” Kaden readily admitted. “I never saw those things as a child, so I sometimes don’t know how to interpret them. I acknowledge that, and I’m working on it. And I’ve started noticing things. I know when Felix likes someone even if he doesn’t tell me, I know Quathryn likes the harp the very best because of the way she dances to it, I know Eleana’s favourite scents just from the way she wiggles her nose, and I know now that you love me like a son. I can also see that you two – that you’re trying to have a _baby_.” the last word came out strangled, not because he wasn’t happy but because he was so overjoyed at the prospect. “Focus on yourselves for a while, and I’ll work on finding my mother. As Lord, my father should be at the Bloodrite, and I’ll confront him then. I’ll order him to tell me more, and if that doesn’t work I’ll get Eleana to order him. By now I know he fears her.” Kaden chuckled lightly and gripped Mor’s hands tighter. “Between a potential child and the enquiry into the creatures Felix, Eleana and I found, you have a lot on your plate.”

“I love you, poppet.” Mor hugged him tightly, and Kaden heard her sniffle as she tried not to cry. “Don’t worry about having dinner here, just go to Eleana.” She pulled away and Azriel moved to stand next to her.

“There’s just one more thing you should know though,” he said. “The reason we have more time free now is because Rhys had ordered we stop looking into the creatures you found.”

_____

 

Kaden was reeling as he made his way to Eleana’s home. It made sense, there were more logical reasons the High Lord felt explained the happenings around Prythian, and as it turned out none of the evidence they had gathered wasn’t plausible enough – for the main part because none of it could be verified. No wards were broken, no bodies were found, and what dumbfounded him the most: no evidence of anyone being Under the Mountain since it was originally sealed was apparent. The High Lord went himself, and the things that had chased Eleana that day were nowhere to be seen.

By now dusk had fallen, leaving a purple and red hue to cover the camp. Tired Illyrians made their way home to their families, Kaden waved to Felix as he passed him on his way to duty, and shopkeepers closed their stores for the night.

As Kaden stood in front of Eleana’s front window though, any thoughts he had left him.

He had gotten there an hour before planned, and he got to watch her set up dinner. There was a red tablecloth spread under an abundance of meat and vegetable platters, dips set up on the sides with different cheeses, crackers and breads accompanying them, all lit by candles on intricate golden candlesticks. He watched her as she rearranged bouquets of flowers and spread rose petals on the ground and around the table, all the time jittering from excitement. It was nice to watch her, to see her be so excited for him.

Cauldron, to the stars and beyond into the infinite night, he loved this woman.

He knocked on the door, feeling excited himself to finally see the inside of her home.

He heard a loud rustling inside and swearing, and Eleana talked to him without opening the door.

“You’re early.” She said through the wood.

“Indeed.”

“I’m going to let you in, but you have to close your eyes. I’m not dressed yet.”

Kaden snorted but conceited, assuring her that his eyes were closed. He heard the door open, and she gently seized his hand, leading him. She sat him down on a chair and peppered a kiss to both his eyelids before running away, her exuberant footsteps pounding up the stairs. He happily waited until he heard her come back, only opening her eyes once she gave him the go ahead.

She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. Her hair was out, now grown long enough to cover her breasts. She was wearing a tight, black lace top. It was long sleeved and high necked, the lace intricate enough to cover her but still scandalous in its own right. She had on a red satin skirt that fell to the floor, and was barefoot. The loveliest thing though was the soft smile on her face.

Kaden stood up and in front of her, lifting her chin with a single finger. “You are…” he trailed off, not being able to put into coherent words the way she made him feel.

“I know,” she whispered before standing on the tips of her toes so she could kiss him. The kiss was as soft as her smile, gentle like the lull of waves in the spring, and _Cauldron_ how did Kaden get this lucky?

“I hope you’re still hungry,” Eleana pulled back and said.

“I haven’t eaten yet.”

“Good.” Her breath was shaky and with her hands in his she led him to sit at the head of the table. “I must confess I didn’t cook any of this myself. With Felix around, I never really learnt, he always did it for me.”

“I can understand why that might happen. Luckily for you, I am quite a good cook. I’m no Felix but who is?” He pulled her into his lap as he sat, her legs on either side of his and her body leaning into him.

“When did you know that you loved me for sure?”

Kaden was taken aback by the sudden question, but he was happy to answer. “The first time I thought about it was the night of Talysa’s wedding. I thought you were going to leave, and I just scrambled to think of anything I could do that might make you stay. I’d had feelings for you though since the moment we met. Sometimes I imagine what would’ve happened if Felix hadn’t interrupted us.” Kaden laughed. “Oh Mother, I would’ve been relentless in my pursuit of you. I had never been so taken with a woman before, and all I had to do was look at you! And then the bonfire, the _bonfire.”_ Kaden gripped her waist tightly. “Thank the Mother for Pepper Whiskey otherwise I never would’ve had the audacity to treat you the way I had. You were such a terrible dancer.”

She hit him jokingly on the chest. “Rude.”

“And that was the night we got our crowns.” He pointed out. “What about you?”

“I knew for sure the night of Starfall. If the Colloden hadn’t interrupted I would have been very content to just take you there on the cliff. I was pondering it later though, after I had fled, and I knew for sure. Although admittedly my feelings towards you had never been platonic. Kaden, there was never anything about you that I didn’t love wholly. Not a single aspect I would change, not a single hair I would alter. I know you still have your doubts about us.” He tried to argue but she shushed him. “And I need you to know that _I love you_. Every single little part.”

A gust of wind of Eleana’s making blew around the room, vanquishing the flames that lit the room. Kaden peered over her shoulder, and the flowers and platter covering the table were gone, winnowed away by Eleana. He could feel that she wanted no distraction, just wanted it to be her and him.

Eleana kissed him then, deeper and more sensually then the previous times that day. She ground her hips down on him and tangled her hands in his hair. He gasped as she moved her mouth to his neck, sucking and biting at the sweet spots she knew were his most sensitive.

“I have – I have things I have to tell you,” he sputtered.

“Hm?” She continued roaming his skin, pulling down the collar of his shirt so that she could lick and kiss at his collar bones.

“It’s the creatures.” He hoped his words came out properly, with her mouth working him so well it wouldn’t surprise him if the only noises he could make from here on out were incomprehensible moans.

“It can wait until tomorrow – let us have this night.”

He groaned loudly at her words and stood up, hitching her legs around his waist to carry her. He didn’t go far, just rested her behind on the table as he pulled up her skirt. His fingers grazed to her core, and he was satisfied with the wetness he found. “You aren’t wearing any underwear,” he revelled.

“I never do around you.” She smirked and rolled her skirt further up so she was fully exposed to him.

With no grandeur, he jerked his pants down and sheathed himself in her. There were times to take it slow, to make her melt as slowly as ice in autumn, now was not one of those times. For every time he took her slowly, there was a time where she wanted him hard and fast. She laid back on the table and spread her arms out, gasping at the glorious feeling of him being inside her. As he thrusted she breathed his name, her body shaking as he also reached down to massage her sensitive core. His movements became slower as he felt himself coming to a finish, but he held off until he knew that she was coming too. He liked it best like that, when they climaxed simultaneously.

With a gasp of his name and a flutter of her eyelids, she came around him, the final straw in pulling himself over the edge too.

“My bedroom,” she breathed. “Now.” She hopped off the table and held out her hand.

She calmly let him up the stairs and into her room. It reflected well who she was. There was a bookcase with novels carefully arranged on one wall, opposite the room that must have either led to an ensuite or a wardrobe. She had a double bed in a space clearly intended for a single, and hanging above it was a wooden wind chime.

“I’ve never had a boy in my room before.”

“I’m honoured.”

Kaden spent the rest of his night showing her how truly honoured he was, not wasting a single moment on doubt or problems that couldn’t be solved now.

_____

 

Feyre huffed as she and Rhys prepared to go to dinner, her mate staring at her with amusement.

“Just say it,” he drawled.

“I swear I’m happy to be here.”

“Feyre, I know your thoughts.”

She threw up her arms with a cry. “It’s like when she was a baby. I’m so anxious that I’m not with her and that I don’t know exactly what she’s doing. And don’t you dare use that sass on me, I know you’re feeling the same way.” She started pacing with frustration. This whole situation was just like when Eleana was a baby. The first time Eleana and Rhys tried to leave her overnight they thought it would be easy. It was only a few hours into their night out that they both crawled back to Azriel and Mor’s to claim their daughter and whisk her home. They had spent the rest of that night awake with her, Rhys holding her while they watched Eleana sleep.

Rhys opened his arms and Feyre gladly walked into them, resting her head on his strong chest. “Go back to camp, Feyre Darling. We’ll do this another time.”

“Come with me?”

He shook his head. “You know I want to, but there’s just so much to do. I’d rather come during the day so I can spend time with you both. I miss you more than anything. I’d give everything I have if it meant you were both back in Velaris.” His voice started strongly, but it finished barely above a whisper as he thought about how much he hated them being apart.

“I know she wants to stay there, but maybe there’s something we could do to convince her to come home,” Feyre said wistfully.

“Go back to her Feyre, and I’ll come see you tomorrow.”

He pressed a sweet kiss to her forehead, and she longed for him and their family to be together. “Keep your thoughts open, I want it to be like I’m still with you.”

“Always.” He kissed her again, and told her to go. He would pack their things and tell the staff of their departure.

Feyre kissed Rhys once more, already dreading the thought of not being with him. She knew deep in her bones that raising Eleana the way they did was the right thing to do. She needed to be in touch with her Illyrian heritage as much as she did with her fae side, but sometimes the pain Feyre felt being away from Rhys was immeasurable. With a sigh, she winnowed straight into her home, the house that had raised the Illyrian side of her family for hundreds of years.

It was dark, and Feyre took of her coat, boots and gloves before meandering to the stairs. Feyre had expected her daughter to be eating dinner or sneaking a tub of ice-cream for dessert by this time, but Eleana must have already retired to her room. Feyre wanted to check on her, and to make sure she had eaten before Feyre scrounged something up for herself.

She didn’t bother knocking on the door, if her daughter was here she’d be busy reading, and if she wasn’t Feyre would go to her nephew’s home where she undoubtedly would be.

Feyre burst in, and then raced out, slamming the door behind her.

Eleana had certainly _not_ been reading.

No.

Rather all Feyre could see what the exposed back and wings of a male that was undeniably having sex with her seventeen-year-old.

Feyre stood flabbergasted behind the door, opening and closing her mouth like a suffocating fish. All rational inclination escaped her. There were no thoughts of her daughter being mature enough to make this decision, no acknowledgement that as a grown woman she was free to do whatever she pleased with her body.

No.

To her daughter, she not-so-calmly said, “ _BECOME DECENT THIS MINUTE AND COME TALK TO ME RIGHT NOW YOUNG LADY OR CAULDRON DAMNED YOU WILL SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES.”_


	23. Chapter 23

Eleana stared in horror at her closed door, the bang from her mother slamming it still reverberating in the room. She was staring at it over the shoulder of Kaden, who had gone still above her, his face the perfect painting of mortification.

“Shit,” he gasped as he pulled out of her and rolled away. He draped his legs over the side of the bed and clutched his head in his hands. “Fuck, Eleana, I’m so sorry.”

She leant up on her elbows, her face flaming from embarrassment. This was not how she wanted her mother to find out, in literally the most humiliating way possible. She clutched the blanket to her chest, covering herself. She blindly extended an arm to stroke Kaden’s back, the male tenser than she’d ever seen him.

“Your parents are going to kill me,” he said.

“They very well might.” Without context, without knowing the full story, it would not be out of the realm of possibility for her father to come storming in like a tumultuous sea of wrath and do Mother knows what to Kaden.

This is not how she wanted them to find out.

“He’s going to be so mad at me,” she gasped. “Not because of you – never because of you – but because I wasn’t honest. He has – he has no idea that I even _think_ about men like that.” There were many thoughts running through Eleana’s mind as she was confronted with the certainty that her relationship with Kaden was no longer _hers_. Her whole family were now free to nit-pick over it, her parents would now become looming figures of supervision, and with their abilities there was hardly a chance she could keep her mateship a secret.

Kaden stood, shucking on his pants and shirt before gathering some clothes of her own. He helped her in her distraught state dress, and then he left. No more words.

____

 

Feyre had thrown her coat and gloves over the table, pacing back and forth to try and arrange her thoughts before her daughter came out. The male she had been with had already made a hasty retreat, looking the most embarrassed Feyre had ever seen a person. His expression looked reminiscent of her dear friend Azriel’s when she had once caught him with Mor, and Feyre felt bad for the boy. He’d scuttled out too quickly for her to say anything, and if she was being completely candid, she didn’t know what she even would say to him if he’d lingered.

_I know what I’d tell him,_ Rhys hissed through their bond.

Five minutes passed before Eleana came out of her room, a bright shade of red with silver lining her eyes. Feyre fixed her widened gaze on her, but refrained from speaking.  

“Please,” Eleana whispered. “Please don’t tell father, I can’t bear how disappointed he’ll be in me, _please_.” Eleana raised a hand to her face and sobbed into her hands.

 Feyre looked in on shock at her daughter’s reaction, crying had not been what she was expecting. She thought she was going to have to prepare to fight her blazing daughter, and seeing her little girl crying instead fractured her heart the way only a child could.

“Butterfly…” Feyre approached her a gingerly put her arms around her, the older female tucking her into her side like she was a child again. “He won’t be disappointed in you, he loves you far too much. But I have my concerns. Who is this boy? You seem to be serious with him, and there are precautions you need to be taking.” Feyre eased Eleana away from her and stood with her hands on her shoulders. “You don’t want a child so young, and worse than that if you aren’t aware of his sexual history there are a number of nasty things you can catch. Protection is imperative. I wish you had told me you were thinking about having sex so I could have gotten you the appropriate tonics.”

Eleana sniffled, and wiped at her eyes. “I’m – we’re – being careful. He would never be with me like that if he thought there were any risks.”

“Eleana, who is this boy?” Feyre had never seen him before in her life, and she knew or had seen nearly every Illyrian that lived here in her time over the past century. She had made a point of it, in fact, and was slightly surprised that she did not recognize him at all.

“His name is Kaden. He moved here from another camp a year ago. He had a hard upbringing, his brothers savage in a way that’s hard to comprehend. He had no choice – he left or he died.”

That would explain why Feyre might never have seen him before – although the name Kaden itched her brain as if she’d heard it before. “Are you two serious? Or is he just someone you spend time with for fun?” Either way, Feyre would not judge. She had Isaac when she was Eleana’s age, and every young man and women needs to start exploring themselves eventually. Feyre just wished she hadn’t been here when Eleana decided to do said exploring.

Her daughter scoffed at the question, and removed herself away so she could sit at the dining table. She ran her fingers over it, intently looking at the grains in the wood as if they might magically make her disappear. “I’ve known him for ten months, and in that time have been courting him to the best of my ability. He refused for a long while.”

“Why?”

_Refused her? He must be a stupid male to refuse a girl like Laya. He’s too idiotic for her._ Rhys was fuming.

_Shush, Rhys._ Feyre pushed him away with her shields, not hard enough to send him away completely but enough to send a message.

“He’s a bastard of a lord.”

Oh. No further explanation was needed. If he had come from one of the archaic camps then Feyre had no doubt that if he was an honourable male he likely believed himself inadequate for her daughter. 

“He caved about two months ago,” Eleana continued. “He saw me fighting with some misogynist dick and decided it didn’t matter what his parentage would do to my reputation, I was strong enough to handle the backlash if I wanted to. And I wanted to, so badly. I feel like he’s intrinsic to who I am in a way that can’t be fully understood.”

Ten months. Her daughter had been swooning for that long and Feyre’d had no idea. That was around the time of Eleana’s kidnapping, and Feyre realised that she must have met this boy before that even happened, before their lives where upended. Eleana’s infatuation explained a lot of her behaviour, and Feyre might need to have a little chat to Felix about what it meant to lie about her daughter’s whereabouts.

“You quite like this boy,” Feyre said. Eleana was talking about him like she planned on having him around for a long while.

“I do.”

“Then you should probably go get him then. I’ll have dinner ready by the time you return.”

Eleana looked up, her face brightening as her beautiful smile graced it. “Seriously?”

“Off you go.” Feyre waved at the door and Eleana eagerly rushed off to find her man.

Feyre wondered if Eleana would be so thrilled when she realised Rhysand was on his way, as he’d heard the whole encounter, and was _livid_.

____

 

Kaden wanted to kick himself. He should have realised the moment someone else was in the house, especially someone as overtly powerful as High lady Feyre. It was just that when he was with Eleana there was nothing else – no one else – and until now he hadn’t realised how potentially damaging that could be.

He was mortified. To be caught in such a compromising position was alone enough to make his insides shrivel from cringing so hard, but to caught by the mother of the woman he loved, who would now be forced to tell her parents about him when she clearly wasn’t ready? When _he_ wasn’t ready…

He swallowed hard, contemplating whether to run to Felix, Azriel, or just go wallow somewhere in private.

He chose the latter.

He walked towards his tent, running his hands over his face and through his hair. Fuck. _Fuck_. More than just the fact that they were caught being intimate, Kaden also resented that now Eleana was there alone having to explain to the High Lady who he was. Now, Eleana couldn’t opt out the way she could before, the way he wanted her to be able to if she changed her mind about being with a lowly bastard such as himself.

He was nearly to his tent, the walk talking twice as long as he was so lost in his thoughts, weighing him down and making his feet drag.

He was about to turn down the small path that led to the tents, when something slammed into his back. He didn’t worry, not when he saw Eleana’s hands clutch around his middle and felt her press a tender kiss to the space between his wings. His face, even after all this time, turned red as he blushed.

“Eleana, someone might see.” He smoothed his hands over hers so she would release him, but she clutched tighter.

“I don’t care,” she scoffed. He turned so he was facing her, and pressed a quick kiss to her forehead, smoothing her hair back behind her ears and resting his hands on her cheeks.

“What are you doing here?” Maybe she snuck out to avoid the wrath of her mother – it sounded like something she would do.

“She doesn’t care.” Eleana moved away from him but clasped his hands in hers. “Come home with me, and let’s have that dinner I promised.” She started dragging him back to where he had just come from.

“Eleana, I need more of an explanation than that.” His words may have been serious, but just the sight of her while he had been having such tumultuous thoughts had set a wide grin on his face.

She didn’t stop walking. “I explained who you are, and she doesn’t care that I didn’t tell her sooner or that I’m with you. She just wants to meet you, and know that I’m being safe.” Just short of the turn that would make him face her house clearly but from a distance, she slowed. “I know this is sooner than we anticipated, and I’m so, so nervous, but I have you. And I know my mother will love you just as much as I do,” she said earnestly.

“You think she’ll approve of me?” he asked in response.

“Definitely. With that smile and those dimples she’ll be as lost a cause as I am.”

“You’re not worried at all?”

She squeezed his hand in reassurance. “Not with my mother. My father though… we’ll worry about that when the time comes.”

They turned the corner, and Eleana halted, her eyes widening in something just falling short of fear.

It seemed that time had come.

Kaden’s pulsed started racing quicker as he saw Eleana’s home engulfed in darkness, and not her sweet, lovely kind. Even from where he was he could feel the rage that was fuelling the blackness that weaved in and out of windows and doors, simmering through every crevice and swirling back in again. It was like a storm cloud during a hurricane had wrapped around Eleana’s home, and he was fucking terrified.

Her hand moved to grab his shirt, and she pulled as though she might very well try to fly away with him in tow. Before she could move another step though, her front door opened to reveal the High Lord in all his unglamoured glory.

Kaden had only seen the High Lord in person once before – but again, Eleana had been there, so he didn’t take too much notice. He hadn’t even remembered to bow.

Eleana hesitantly smiled at her father, and knowing there was no escape now, they started walking toward the house.

The High Lord was the most intimidating person Kaden had ever seen. He was tall, not as tall as Kaden but he stood in a way that made it seem like everyone else was an ant to him. He was wearing a fine suit, dark material with silver embroidery, and his shoes were polished so well Kaden would likely be able to see his reflection in them. His hair was the same hue as Eleana’s – a blue so dark it was mistakenly seen as black, and his eyes were the same intense shade as his daughters. The most notable thing though was the horrific smirk on his face, more a strategic baring of teeth, aimed directly at Kaden.

“Father, what are you doing here?” Eleana asked as they reached the house proper.

The High Lord’s smile became gentle as he looked at his daughter. “I came to see you, Butterfly.” His face and tone blanked. “And him.”

Eleana tried to meet her father’s gaze, but the High Lord was too busy sneering at Kaden.

“Be nice, Papa,” she whispered to him.

“I’ll be the most gracious host the boy has seen. Please, both of you, come in.” The High Lord marched into the house, Eleana grasping Kaden’s hand before they followed.

The food Eleana had for them was nowhere to be seen, but High Lady Feyre had prepared something else. It was a simple roast with steamed vegetables, something that could only be cooked that quickly with magic. She had set the table for four, and ushered Eleana and Kaden to sit in seats next to each other, with the High Lord directly across from Kaden.

_He’s not normally this menacing,_ Eleana projected into Kaden’s mind.

_Honestly? He’s not acting as stubborn as you sometimes do,_ he joked to try and lighten the mood.

It worked, illustrated by the slight uptilt to her lips, and that was enough for now.

“Let’s chat, shall we?” Rhys picked up a knife and sliced it through the roast, staring at Kaden as he did so.

“I should introduce myself,” Kaden said. He gave them a basic rundown of his life: he was the bastard of a lord across the Steppes, moved here a year ago, when he had met Eleana, so on and so on. He vaguely mentioned that he trained with the Elite, but didn’t go into detail. As soon as he said it though, something flickered in the eyes of the High Lord that he didn’t know whether to be cautious of or not. 

“The Elite? You know our nephew, Felix, then.” High Lady Feyre pointed out, much more pleasantly toned than her mate.

Kaden nodded. “I know Felix quite well.” Kaden looked to Eleana to see if he should divulge more, but she was staring at the table, pushing her food around but not eating any of it. “I would say we’re actually quite close.” Kaden decided there was no point not telling them at this point. If he was now going to be a public figure in Eleana’s life than it was inevitable that his brotherhood with Felix would be revealed.

“Is that right.” The High Lord was doubtful.

“They are,” Eleana finally chimed in, albeit quietly. “Felix considers him a brother; he’d do anything for him.”

Rhys raised an eyebrow, but didn’t push the matter further. “We’ve established who your father is, but what of your mother?”

Kaden swallowed hard. He felt a finger tap against his own, and flicked his eyes to see that Eleana had linked their pinkies in silent support.

“My mother was a fae from Hewn City. She… died, soon after my birth. I don’t remember her. As a half-breed, you can imagine that I wasn’t allowed in the city for long, and my father took me in as an infant.”

At that, the High Lord’s tense face changed. He shared a look with the High Lady, who said, “My own mother died when I was very young, and Rhys’ was also taken far too soon. It’s not an easy thing – growing up without a mother. Were you close to much of your family?”

As Kaden looked at the High Lady, he realised that she was not someone he needed to be afraid of. Of course, if he ever hurt Eleana that would be a different story, but he didn’t plan on doing that. She was being kind, almost gentle with him, and it made him wonder what Eleana may have told her in those minutes right after he had fled the house.

“I had one cousin, Talysa, that treated me fairly. But it was not until I came here that I felt for the first time what it was like to have a real family, and people who unconditionally cared about you. Felix has been amazing, right from the very first day. Stubborn as anything, but a very loving sort of stubborn.”

The High Lord laughed at that, his whole being becoming brighter. “That reminds me a lot of my brothers Cassian and Azriel. Az was so quiet when he first moved in with us. By then Cass and I had already established these weird habits of dealing with each other, but then Az came and just threw us off completely. After that we were inseparable, and bloody Cass would never stay out of people’s business, especially Azriel’s.”

_Remind you of anyone?_ Eleana snickered to Kaden.

His only answer was a smile, and he continued listening to the High Lord.

“… and Azriel didn’t even care! He welcomed the attention! I caught my mother tearing up on multiple occasions, and we, so young but nearly the same height as her, would crowd around her to see what was wrong but she was just happy.”

The High Lord smiled.

And that smile was everything Eleana was. The light she had as an intrinsic part of her had been taught to her by her parents. He could see it in the way they smiled, the way they laughed. The High Lord looked at High Lady Feyre the way Kaden had seen Eleana looking at him countless times.

Ten minutes ago, he had not been ready. He was now. For it all.

_____

 

The rest of the night continued rather pleasantly. Rhys warmed to the boy, even though there had been multiple occasions where he’d screamed at Feyre through the bond for referring to this male as their daughter’s _partner_. Rhys still cringed at the term, but he wouldn’t eventually. Maybe. He’d see. It would take time for him to get the idea out of his head that this male wasn’t just trying to take advantage of Eleana.

There was also something about the boy that irked him in a way he couldn’t properly describe. It was an unwelcome feeling of familiarity, sparked by his name and by, weirdly enough, the shape of his nose. It had set Rhys on edge the whole evening, despite it being a somewhat pleasant one.

Their meal had long been finished, and they all shared equally tired looks, especially Kaden. Most notably though had been Eleana’s silence throughout the whole meal. She rarely spoke, and when she did it wasn’t in her usual rambunctious way. Rhys was desperate to talk to her, to get some answers on why she had been with this man for so long and hadn’t told him, but he wanted to wait until they were alone.

As Kaden got up to leave, he bowed deeply and thanked Rhys and Feyre for the night. Rhys watched the boy walk his daughter to the door and press a sweet kiss to her cheek, his eyes locking on hers as his thumbs lightly brushed her cheeks. Rhys had seen that look before. The two were having a conversation through their minds, and although Rhys was curious he didn’t invade their privacy by trying to listen in.

Kaden left, and Rhys found himself relieved when he did. The boy was nice, there was no doubt there, but for Eleana? For his little girl, the one who as a child would chase butterflies, dance through the Rainbow, the smartest, most beautiful young women in Prythian… Rhys did not think this boy enough for her. Although in the boy’s defense, he thought no one good enough.

Feyre grabbed his shoulders from behind and leaned forward to kiss his cheek. “I’m going to bed.”

_You better not leave before telling me goodbye,_ she ordered him through the bond.

He acknowledged her with a nod, but didn’t take his eyes off his daughter.

He knew this day would come, the day where she started claiming men and owning her body, but even after seventeen, nearly eighteen, years of life he still saw the baby that would blow kisses at random people in the street and wave at anything that moved. Rhys didn’t know if he was able to let those images go, if he was willing to accept that she had grown into a person he as no longer completely familiar with.

Once upon a time, there was not a thing he didn’t know about his daughter. But he had been gone for too long, and there were pieces of her scattered across this camp – a whole other life – that he could spend the rest of his time trying to collect and still have pieces missing. Was this something all parents faced? Cassian never spoke about Felix like this, but then again, Felix was very different to Eleana.

Rhys spoke her name softly, and she responded with a deep shudder that ran through her body and a supressed sob.

Rhys’ eyes widened in alarm and he was at her side instantly, holding her tightly against him. She put her arms around him and squeezed, the way she used to when he was there when she woke up from nightmares and couldn’t stop crying.

“Please, _please_ don’t be mad at me,” she hiccupped. “I know you’re disappointed in me and I know you’re mad, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I wasn’t ready.”

Rhys brushed back her hair and shushed her. “I could never be disappointed in you, I love you too much. I’m just surprised, Laya. I had no idea this was going on, and I don’t like that there’s this distance between us.” The emotional distance, but also that she was so physically far away.

Rhys took a deep breath. “I think it’s time for you to come back to Velaris. Permanently.”

Eleana stilled. “Excuse me?” She moved back from him, over an arms-length away, and the chest fallen girl from moments ago was gone.

“There is no reason to continue being here. You’ve learnt all you can from the Illyrians, and it’s time to come home now.”

Eleana blanched. “Is that right?”

Rhys could feel Feyre listening in from the other room, tapping on his mind every now and again to remind him she was there observing.

“You’ve always missed Velaris, and if you were home around the fae-”

“Oh fuck off.”

Rhys was taken aback by her language, but she continued too quickly for him to scold her for speaking to him like that. Usually, he wouldn’t have minded, but right now he wasn’t in the right head space.

“You don’t want me home so that we can be reunited as a family, you want me home so that I’ll always be under the watchful eyes of my aunts and uncles and so I can’t pursue this _very real thing_ between Kaden and I. That’s bullshit, and you know better than to try and force someone’s hand like that.” The air around the two started to simmer with wrathful magic, darkness leaking from both of them.

“This has nothing to do with that boy.”

“His name is _Kaden_.”

“This has to do with needing all my family back in Velaris. This isn’t new to you, Eleana, I’ve already expressed that I wanted you home and away from here. I know this may hurt now, but if this male is the one for you it’ll work anyway. And if not, there are plenty of fae in Velaris to choose from when you’re older.”

That sparked a rage in her so monumental that she screamed, “You have _no right_ , none, to dictate these things! As much as you deny it, that you hate to admit it, I am not a little girl. I am a grown woman, and nothing you can do can take me away from the man I love.”

“I’m not going to steal you away like some monster-”

“And yet that is exactly what you are implying! If you take me away from Kaden, from the person I love and trust with my heart and soul, then you are no better than High Lord Tamlin when he tried to take mother from you,” she sneered.

_Cauldron_ , Rhys didn’t even know she was aware of that.

Feyre was knocking on his mind again, urgently asking if he needed help. At this point, both he and Eleana had filled the room with thunderous shadows filled with an electric static. Rhys declined her request, mostly because he was two seconds away from just grabbing his daughter and winnowing back to Velaris.

He took a step toward her, but stopped.

Everything did.

He saw Eleana, so strong and yet before his eyes she crumbled into herself and fell to her knees, her cries no longer indignant but tortured in a way he had never heard before. No nightmares, no pain, had ever made his daughter cry that way she was now.

He banished his darkness, and dropped to the floor next to her. He pulled her to his chest tightly, his hands shaking from worry. He wanted to ask her for an explanation, was about to apologize a million times over for what he’d said and how outrageous he had been, but before he could she spoke words he never thought he would hear.

“He’s not just some boy,” she choked. “He’s my mate. He’s my _mate_ and he has no idea but _I knew the moment I saw him_.”

At that, Feyre stormed out of the room she’d been eavesdropping from so she could also lower herself to the floor to bundle Eleana in her arms. “Never. You will _never_ have to leave him. Everything will be okay. We’re sorry.” Feyre kissed the top of her head. “Since your father is so lacking at explanations,” she glared at him over Eleana, “he forgot to mention that we had already decided to seriously consider coming back to Velaris. All this means is that once young Kaden has finished the Bloodrite, we would like him to come too. He is half-fae after all, it’s time he discovered the other side to his heritage.”

She looked up at them. “You understand?”

“Of course,” Rhys and Feyre both said.

“I’m just – I’m so frustrated. I don’t want to tell him. I want him to realise on his own. His whole life, he’s never had any choice in what happens to him. But he can choose this, choose _me_. And I know he will, but I’ll be damned if he doesn’t know it’s one hundred percent of his own volition.”

Rhys looked down at his daughter, and in this moment recognized more of himself in her than he had in years. He knew exactly how it felt to have a mate you love endlessly who isn’t aware of your bond, and he wished more than anything she had told him so he could have supported her through this time.

“I can’t leave him.”

“I know,” Rhys whispered to her.

“I love him.”

“And that will be one of the greatest joys in your life, Butterfly, and I’m happy you found it so soon.” Feyre looked at Rhys again over their daughter, no worry to be seen but instead unfiltered relief.

_____

 

It took a few hours, but eventually Feyre and Rhys calmed down their daughter enough for Rhys to feel comfortable leaving. His head was still spinning, and he knew where he needed to go to be righted.

He flew into the atrium of the House of Wind, winding through the corridors and halls before he made it to Cassian’s office. He knew his general would be working late, they were on the cusp of a major weaponries trade deal with the Continent, and Cassian had been meticulously going over the details for days now.

Cassian was there with his infant daughter slung across his chest in cloth, rocking her gently as she whimpered the way all young babies do late at night.  

“Things not go well with Feyre?” He smirked. Cassian knew Rhys was meant to be away with his wife.

“The night definitely didn’t go to plan.” Rhys sighed heavily through his nose.

Rhys didn’t understand how Cassian could be so effortlessly good at parenting. Rhys once thought he was quite good at it, but after the spectacle tonight he was doubting himself. And here Cassian was, juggling three children like it was nothing. Felix was an amazing young man, Quathryn sweeter than the finest candy Velaris had to offer, and little Thea a blessing from the Mother.

“I need your advice.” Rhys pulled up a chair in front of Cassian’s desk and rested his head in his hands.

“Need help in the bedroom? Thought so.”

“Oh fuck off.” Rhys said, unconsciously mirroring his daughter’s words from earlier. “Something major has happened.”

Cassian studied Rhys in concern: the dark under-eyes, the slumped shoulders, the crinkled clothes. “What’s going on?”

“Eleana –  Eleana has found her mate.”

Cassian lurched in surprise. “No fucking way.”

“Yep. I handled it terribly. I feel like an awful father.”

“How do you know?”

“She confessed it after Feyre caught her… with the boy.”

Cassian immediately knew what Rhys meant when he said _with the boy_ and cringed in sympathy.

“Have you ever met or heard of a male named Kaden in the Elite? He said he was close to Felix, but he could just be saying that to try and impress Feyre and I.”

Cassian’s eyebrows rose in recognition. “Kaden? We literally spoke about him last week.”

“What?”

“That’s the young male I suggested we move to Velaris for political training so I might one day have him as an ambassador, diplomat or general. And he’s not lying about Felix; the two are like brothers, just like us when we were young.” Cassian voice was laced with shock. “I shouldn’t swear in front of Thea, but holy fucking shit Rhys.”

Rhys did remember the conversation he’d had with Cassian, and it had been basically an hour of him giving a glowing recommendation for this one soldier he desperately wanted in Velaris and under his wing.

“He’s an extraordinary young man, and the things he and Felix will do when they’re older will change the world. I have complete faith in him. And I can’t forget to mention how much Nesta loves him, she has a little bit of a crush. So does Quathryn.” Cassian smirked at Rhys. “I know you well, and however you reacted was probably far more dramatic than the situation called for. But damn, Eleana and him are mates. I didn’t even realise they were together.”

“It’s recent. And he doesn’t know about them being mates either, so keep that information to yourself.” Rhys thought coming to see Cassian would ease his mind, but it only made it swirl harder.

Cassian sneaked a glance around his office, and then leaned forward like he was about to reveal his deepest, darkest secret. By now, Thea had settled and looked like she was having quite the calming sleep while snuggled up to her father’s chest. “While talking to Kaden today, did you notice anything peculiar about his appearance?”

Rhys frowned. “He has an awful lot of scars for someone his age, but that’s about it. And, this is stupid and I fully recognize that, but there was something up with his nose? I can’t put my finger on what it is though. It’s a perfectly normal nose.”

“I’m going to tell you something, and you have to swear on your life you won’t tell anyone I told you. Especially Azriel.”

“Okay.” Rhys replied hesitantly.

Cassian opened his mouth to talk but was interrupted by a dark voice from the corner of the room.

“That’s not your news to share, Cassian,” Azriel bit, coming out of the shadows.

Both Rhys and Cassian leaped out of their chairs.

“How long have you been hiding in the shadows? You scared the shit out of me!” Cassian hissed with one hand pressed over Thea’s ear so the noise wouldn’t wake her.

“Only long enough to see you were about to drop the bombshell I was.” Azriel stalked forward but bypassed them, instead going to the cabinet that held Cassian’s secret supply of whiskey. He poured himself a glass, and turned wearily to his brothers. “Don’t bother filling me in on the day’s events, I already know what happened.”

“You have spies that would know?” Rhys asked incredulously.

“Better. I have a nephew that was there.” Azriel took a deep swig of his drink.

“Felix wasn’t there.” Rhys replied.

“No, but Kaden was.” Azriel ended his statement by tapping his nose three times with his index finger, mirth in his expression.

It took Rhys four beats of his heart to go, “Oh. _Oh_.”

“If you’re wondering, yes, Eleana, Kaden and Felix know. Also, Mor and I consider him like a son, and we expect you to treat him as such.”

This was too much information for Rhys to handle all at once, and he looked at Cassian to see if he was in the same state of disbelief. Cassian though, didn’t seem too fazed.

“You knew,” Rhys scoffed at him.

“The nose gave it away.” Cassian shrugged.

Rhys joined Azriel at his side and poured himself a very overfull glass, skulling it with barely a cough. The alcohol seemed the only remedy for his sudden dizziness. “My brain hurts.”

Azriel clapped him on the back. “You’ll get used to it.”

 


	24. Chapter 24

 

One map.

Two soldiers.

Three mistakes.

The first mistake, carelessly leaving their squadron to have a romantic rendezvous in a volatile area. The second, discarding their bags full of sensitive information the way they discarded their clothes. The last, trying to scream as it ran its claws over their tender necks, making their deaths all the more painful.

These Illyrians were so soft, so pudgy. You touched them, and their flesh would just concave in.

Spread out before it, its lovely creatures, crafted from the darkness in corners and fallen stars from the night, guarding it faithfully, was a map of the expanse of Prythian, a name it struggled to hiss with its inhuman tongue.

With its books and maps now in its possession, it had learned a great deal. It had learnt their worst fears thanks to a leather-bound book with illustrations that would garner fear even from its home realm. It had discovered, and abused, their most scared spaces. It had used spells previously only possible with world-creating relics. Most importantly though, it had learnt their language.

It had learnt that they would refer to it as a Queen, maybe a Princess, maybe an Heir, maybe a Ruler.

In their world, it was a _she_.

And they should fear her a great deal.

For when she started all those months ago, slaughtering that troupe of rowdy Illyrians, she was as far from her most sought after need as the moon was from the sea, and now, and _now_ , she was as close as a willow tree to a creek.

And she was ready to get her body.

____

 

Eleana was practically skipping as she ran to Felix’s. She knew Thea was going to be there, and honestly? She was in the mood to snuggle with a baby.

Even after her romantic day with Kaden had been completely and utterly spoiled, the night hadn’t ended as badly as it could have. Right now, her mother was working on something to do with the share-houses, and Eleana had it on good authority that her father was likely going to come see them again today, so Eleana wanted to take this time to, yes, cuddle with a cute baby, but to also debrief Felix on everything that had happened.

She walked right in the door and squealed when she saw Thea in her eldest cousin’s arms, and without acknowledging anyone else in the room, swept her away from him and clutched Thea to her chest.

“Hello,” she cooed.

Felix snorted from where he was standing and crossed him arms. “I’m going to assume you weren’t talking to me.”

“Or me,” Cassian scoffed.

Eleana simply smiled at them and turned her attention to Quathryn, who had been holding tight onto the Felix’s pants, leaning her head against him. Quathryn must be very tired with the new baby around, and you could see it in her heavy eyes and the way she swayed against her brother.

“Hello to you, too, Quathryn. I’m so happy to see you.”

Quathryn gave her a smile in return, and upraised her arms so that Felix would pick her up.

“She’s exhausted,” Cassian sighed. Her uncle approached Eleana and ruffled her hair affectionately, and peered over her shoulder at all three of his children. “We all are. The girls and I came to visit so that Nesta could sleep without being interrupted, and the little ones were desperate for some time with their big brother. Quite the set of lungs on this one.”

Cassian did look weary, and Felix noticed too. “Why don’t you rest, Father? I’ll take care of the girls.”

Cassian shook his head. “I have to watch them. I love you two dearly, but taking care of a newborn babe and toddler isn’t fun or easy.”

“We’ll stay here,” Eleana said as she started running her fingers through Thea’s spikey hair. How do baby’s hairs just stand on end like that?

Before Cassian could say any more, Felix prodded him in the shoulder towards one of the bedrooms. Quathryn, forever mimicking her beloved brother, reached out and did the same.

“It’s nap time for Papa, isn’t it Quathryn?”

“Yes!” she squeaked.

“No,” Cassian yawned. “I have business to conduct while I’m here, none of which I can do if I’m sleeping.”

“I’ll do it for you, or send Kaden too. The bastard would be happy to help.” Felix was offering anything he could to possibly help him.

Cassian hesitated. “Kaden is actually the only thing I need to take care of.” Cassian looked Eleana dead in the eyes. “Rhys came to see me yesterday, and a decision was made.”

Eleana reeled internally, but she only let a small amount of shock register on her face. “What decision?”

“Call him here and you’ll see.”

____

 

Kaden was there in a literal minute. The moment Eleana said she needed him, he stopped what he was doing and came to her right away. With Kaden completely unaware of it, she had been using their bond a lot more lately. He chalked it up to her being a daemati, but really she was just speaking to him through the invisible tether that joined them.

Kaden stormed through the door, and upon realising that nothing was wrong and she just wanted him with her, he greeted her with a kiss to the cheek.

In front of Cassian.

Because that was something they could do now. No more hiding, it was all out in the open.

“Hey.” Kaden turned from her and also greeted Felix and Quathryn, the latter also receiving a kiss to the cheek.

“Where’s mine?” Felix joked as Kaden turned to also say hello to Cassian.

“You don’t deserve a kiss.” Kaden winked at him and returned to Eleana’s side, his hand casually sliding around her waist.

Eleana saw Felix and Cassian share a sly look at the sight, and she let it go. Let them think it was funny, she had her mate’s hand around her waist in front of everyone, not that Felix really counted, but she was still beyond happy about it.

“There’s actually a reason you’re here.” Felix said. Quathryn has her head rested against his shoulder, and her eyes had finally closed, small snores emitting from her.

“Why?”

“Because of this.” Cassian reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out an envelope as he came towards Kaden. He held it out, and As Kaden took it he scooped Thea up and tucked her into his arm. Thea was so small it was possible to hold her in the crevice of your arm. That is, if you had arms as muscly as the Illyrian males in Eleana’s family did.

Kaden looked at the envelope curiously, and tore the top open so he could pull out a letter.

There were two letters in the envelope, one small and one large. Eleana watched as he read the small one first, a restrained smile on his face as he did. When he read the second one, he froze, and looked at Cassian in disbelief.

“This – this can’t be real,” he stuttered.

“It is.” Cassian was smirking.

Eleana peered at Kaden, Felix equally as curious. “So?” Felix questioned. “What is it?”

Kaden handed the first letter to Eleana, who sprung to Felix’s side so they could read it together.

“This is an invitation to Velaris – for tonight. Everyone will be there, even Elain and Lucien!” Eleana gasped.

Felix just beamed brightly, not wanting to do anything more lest he wake his sister.

“There’s more.” Kaden handed her the other letter.

As Eleana read, tears of joy lined her eyes, and a small whine left her lips as she collided into Kaden’s awaiting arms, hers going around his neck as she clutched him to her.

“It’s immediate the moment you have your tattoos, should you wish to accept.” Cassian explained. “You will live in Velaris and train with the High Lord and I, Azriel occasionally. Within the decade, you will be promoted and likely given a team similar to the Elite, or alternatively, you will work across the different continents as a diplomat or spy. Velaris will always be your main location, and after some time, if you prove yourself worthy, you would become an official member of the Inner Circle.”

Kaden laughed into her neck as he embraced her back, his chest rumbling and warming her to her core. “I don’t know what you said to your parents after I left last night, because I certainly didn’t give _that_ good an impression.”

She pulled back and slapped his chest playfully. “Yes you did.” She hugged him again, and over his shoulder looked at Felix. Felix looked… anything but thrilled.

____

 

Eleana stood next to the birdbath in her garden in Velaris, surrounded by roses as she waited for Kaden to come. She was wearing the same outfit she had at the bonfire the first time they’d spent real time at the camp together, and she thought it fitting that she got out one of her favourite outfits again for the first time they spent a night out in Velaris. Over the summer, her skin had darkened even more, making the white of her off the shoulder crop and flowing pants accentuate her bronze features.

She was waiting for him here because he desperately needed to tell her something. He was meant to the day previous, before she’d distracted him with tales of love and inappropriate acts, and this morning he had whispered to her that it was imperative she and Felix knew, but he couldn’t tell her with the General around. She was horribly curious as to what it was, and she hoped he wouldn’t take much longer to come to her.

He was currently rummaging through the closet Mor and Azriel had supplied to him, trying to guess what a casual-formal outfit was meant to look like in a city he had been to but never had the change to explore.

So she let herself be consumed by the smell of flowers and the noises of her parents bustling around inside. She was so enthralled by the vibrant colours that she missed so much that she nearly didn’t notice when Kaden crept up behind her to wrap his arms around her waist. But she did, she always did.  

“My Dark Rose,” he purred into her ear.

“You’re happy today,” she noted with a smile. She turned so she could cup his face with her hands, and pressed a lingering kiss to his cheek.

“I’m very excited about tonight. I also may or may not be overcompensating because I know as soon as I tell you my news you’ll likely start spewing darkness everywhere.”

She rolled her eyes at him and pecked his cheek again. “Have it out then. What could possibly make me that mad?”

Kaden scanned the garden, taking in everything around him: the stone paths, the flowers in full bloom, the balconies in the distance, the trees lining the edge of their land. It was clear he was making sure they wouldn’t be overheard.

“It’s about the creatures.”

Eleana blanched. “What about them?”

“The investigation into them has stopped. Azriel told me yesterday, and I knew it was imperative you also knew. I haven’t told Felix yet, but we should.”

Kaden was correct when he assumed her anger would be significant enough for her darkness to start crawling its way out of her. “Why?” she breathed.

“They think that – that we were reaching in what we presented to them. That there are far more logical explanations and that it wasn’t worth looking into further because they just don’t think there’s anything there.”

“But what about the Impeath? The Colloden? The Mountain?”

“The Colloden they think was something else, and that we just made that connection because of the book. As for the Impeath, they think that whatever attacked Felix that night jumbled you both enough that you’re now an unreliable witness. And the Mountain? They went, and there was nothing. Not a trace of all the things we’ve witnessed there.”

She sighed through her nose. “We told them everything because we weren’t experienced enough to handle it on our own. Felix, maybe, but even he would need a team beyond what the Elite could do. He would need Az, or my father. For fuck’s sake.”

Kaden held her close to him and hid his face in the crook of her neck. “We’ll work this out.”

“But how many people will die in the meantime?”

He ran a hand down her back. “I’ll fill Felix in and meet you tonight for my formal introductions.”

“You need to talk to him about Velaris too.” Eleana hadn’t missed the look of desolation on Felix’s face at the mention of his best friend leaving him.

“I know.” Kaden had noticed as well then. “I don’t know what to do. Leaving is playing into his fears of abandonment, but I have to do this. I know we’ll come to a solution. I wish it was as simple as doing what’s best for me, which is training with the General and High Lord, but I also need him, and you.” He groaned deeply. “Why can’t everything be simple?”

“I’ll see you tonight, and we’ll sort it out after my family inevitably falls in love with you.”

_____

Dusk had been and gone when everyone gathered in the front yard of the townhouse to walk to the restaurant together. Feyre and Rhys were talking to Lucien, who was holding baby Thea, and Mor and Azriel were standing with Nesta and Cassian, the two brothers with their arms around each other’s shoulders. Eleana was standing with Felix, fresh out of his conversation with Kaden, a bristling air following the two eldest children. Quathryn was in the arms of her brother, tugging at his hair and telling him how he needed to get it cut.

As for Kaden, he was standing back after having gone into the house to get a drink, observing the tight-knit family that he was supposed to slot into. They were all so harmonious with each other – well, for the most part. Neither Eleana or Felix had yet to start speaking to Azriel again, which he might need to have a word to them about. He understood where they were coming from, why they would be mad that Azriel had not told him of their relation, but it had gone too far at this point. They cared far too much about him.

“Some might say it’s impolite to stare like that.”

Kaden nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of Elain’s voice behind him, and as he turned to look at her he put a hand over his now thundering heart. “I wasn’t staring,” he defended.

“I feel like we got off to a rough start,” Elain said.

Kaden could see Mor prick up at the sight of them talking, but his pseudo-mother didn’t make a start to interrupt them. Instead, her keen eyes observed them.

Kaden glanced at Elain, her smile soft. She had a long flowing lilac gown with embroider flowers covering the bodice on, and her hair was braided with actual poppies intertwined with it. She looked far less frightening than on the only other day he’d ever seen her, but he still had his reservations. As did Felix, it seemed, as he had now joined his aunt in dutifully watching the pair.  

“Do not worry, Lady Elain, what’s in the past can stay there.” He took a step away from her, to go to Felix who was very subtlety gesturing for him to come over, but Elain put a hand on his arm to stop him.

“Sometimes, the power and the worry I have for my family consumes me. Without Lucien or Azriel there to reign it in, I can lose control – just like any fae who has too much of one sort of magic. I sincerely apologize for leaving you in the state I did, and for not making sure later that you were taken care of, especially after what you did for my family.”

Kaden gulped at her words. “How many people know what I did?”

“Only the people you’ve informed. They’ll all find out soon enough though.”

“How do you know?”

She tapped a finger to her temple and then walked away, her smile, although still kind, now uptilted like she had a precious secret only she knew.

Left dazed by the short interaction, Kaden went to join Felix, Eleana and Quathryn, quickly explaining what Elain had said to him. They were both as baffled as he, but didn’t let it quash their excitement as the family started walking towards the restaurant. They were going to one of Mor’s favourites, she demanded it saying that she deserved to take her son wherever she damn well liked his first night in the city. She looked slightly taken aback after she’d said it, not intending to use the words _my son_ , and after she’d slipped up and looked to him to apologize, she just saw a happily blushing boy who didn’t know quite how to react to her unconditional love.

Kaden and Eleana started to dawdle behind the others, Eleana constantly stopping him to point something out. The first thing she needed him to see was the clear waters of the Sidra, and how the lights from the buildings behind them made it a lightshow. After that, it was a bridge where she had first started experimenting with her darkness, and she’d carved her name and Felix’s into the stone behind a lamppost. She’d told him about how she’d gotten in huge trouble for vandalism, but the next day Feyre had brought her back with special paints so they could decorate the area around it. Eleana’s whole body shone with happiness when they walked past the rainbow and she’d shown him her favourite alleyway, called Le Clara Avenue. It was lined with tiny little shops, all selling different decorative desserts. The shops themselves were so small that the only place to sit was on the tables and chairs scattered throughout the street, usually placed under the name signs hanging between the two huge buildings that made the alleyway. The last thing she was able to show him on their way there was her favourite bookstore. The shelves spanned every wall all the way to the top of the high ceilings, and the floor was a maze of more shelves. They were all a rich, dark timber and the carpet was a pristine, white marble with rugs of various colours scattered throughout. There were books from every land, from every genre, and Eleana could easily get lost in there for hours on end. It wasn’t unusual for the store clerks to find her cross-legged on the floor tucked into a corner somewhere – that was, when she was in Velaris.

Kaden had to drag her away from there, but with promises that they would return soon.

When they finally made it to the restaurant, Kaden was drunk off of the colourful streets and smell of spices in the air. He wasn’t able to sit next to Eleana, but on his right was Felix and his left Morrigan. Directly across from him was the High Lord, and then Eleana next to him.

“Thank you for the invitation, High Lord. It’s truly an honour.” Kaden inclined his head towards Eleana’s father.

“My pleasure,” he replied.

Eleana glowered at her father playfully. “You can call him Rhys,” she said to Kaden.

“No, he cannot.”

“Yes you can,” Feyre butted in with a smirk.

They continued their banter, but Kaden was more focused on the music he could hear outside. The sliding glass doors to the restaurant made up the whole front of the building they were in, and they were all open, letting in the air and music. Kaden couldn’t see them, but there were fae out there somewhere playing an array of fiddles and violins, and he could hear the light scuffle of feet as fae danced around them. He listened to this music all through the meal, all through the official introductions to High Lord Lucien and Lady Elain, even when Eleana sneakily snaked her foot a bit too high up his leg to tease him.

He’d never heard music like that – never heard people being so carelessly free and felt as though he could join in. It was transfixing.

The food had been lovely, and he’d had to refrain from moaning at every bite. He’d had gorgeously tender lamb with an array of herbs and sauces he’d never had before, and he’d accompanied it with Felix’s favourite wine.

Between the food, the music, and the pulse of happiness he could feel from Eleana, it had been a good night so far.

With all their bellies full, they decided to linger just a bit to take in the atmosphere. Kaden’s mind kept going to that music though, to the fae that were still dancing.

Eleana noticed, and reached across the table to take his hand. “Kaden?” she murmured.

“Yes, my love?”

She bit her lip at the words _my love,_ then squeezed his hand. “Will you dance with me?”

He breathed a heavy, relieved sigh. “Always.”

They both got up without explanation, the High Lord reaching to stop his daughter from leaving, but she slipped through his grip. Instead, she walked around the table and linked her elbow with Kaden’s, and they left to find the source of the music.

It didn’t take long. There was a makeshift stage made from merchant boxes set up, and a wide circle surrounding it for couples to dance. There were little candles dangling on strings overhead, the ropes they were attached to hanging on to all the buildings around them, no matter how far and few between. Past that, there were plenty of onlookers, all clapping and swaying to the instruments.

Eleana stopped at the sight of so many, but Kaden dragged her forward until they were in the centre of dancers. He put one of her hands on his shoulder and then held the other one out next to them, his own arm snaking around her waist.

“Are you ready?”

She closed her eyes. “With you? Yes.”

They started slow, he let her get her footing and then they were off. He twirled her, and dipped her, and had her laughing so hard that she didn’t even notice when she stepped on his toes (which was often but he didn’t mind). At one point, he lifted her up around the waist, spinning her with her head thrown back in pure, unadulterated joy.

_____

 

Rhys had never been so shook in his life.

He remembered once, months ago, when Eleana had come to the townhouse to show him a dance she had learnt. She wasn’t very great at it, but at least that time she hadn’t broken anything, and he had been so, so proud of her.

And now, he was looking at her _actually_ dancing with someone, and he had to refrain from crying. He remembered all those times as a child when she’d sobbed because she couldn’t dance like the other fae, every time he’d had to heal her or someone else because her flailing was downright dangerous. He blindly grabbed for the arms of his mate, and when he finally got her attention she was just as shocked as him.

“I don’t think it dawned on me until now that they’re mates,” Feyre said quietly.

Rhys wasn’t even ashamed to say, in reality he was exuberant, “They’re perfect, Feyre. She’s – our little girl is going to be so happy with him.”

Feyre clutched onto his side as they watched Kaden and Eleana dance with the other fae as complete equals.

The song finished, and an exhilarated Kaden and Eleana made their way back to the family.

“Don’t you go anywhere, young man.” Mor stepped forward and held out a hand to Kaden. “I want a dance too. I’ve never met anyone as good as me, so let’s put you to the test.”

Kaden smirked competitively, and left Eleana with a kiss to the cheek to dance with Mor.

Kaden was put to the test alright, and he scored perfectly.

He had been holding back with Rhys’ daughter, and watching him dance to his full skill was like watching a storm cloud build a hurricane – effortless yet with the upmost power and control.

The other fae who were dancing stopped, and all joined the crowd of onlookers to watch Kaden and Mor. They were both clearly trying to one up the other, and it made for a fantastic spectacle. Rhys idly wondered where Kaden had learnt to do that if his past was as horrible as Eleana claimed, but didn’t dwell on it. They were all allowed to have their moments of light in the darkness, and this seemed to be Kaden’s. And the fact that he was now able to share his love and gift of dancing with his daughter… Rhys would love him, just for that.

The audience clapped as the dance came to an end, both Mor and Kaden breathing deeply with a fine layer of sweat on their brows.

Although the music continued, the Inner Circle steered their children back home. They all walked along, and Rhys was listening to Eleana as she pointed out every little thing she thought Kaden would like. He risked a glance over at them, but definitely didn’t again when he saw Kaden sweep her into his arms to kiss her. He liked the boy, but he sure as hell didn’t want to see that.

At one point, about halfway back to the townhouse, he and Cassian stood next to each other and watched Kaden and Felix mucking around, pushing each other and jumping over the other’s head, racing around and laughing loudly.

“It’s strange,” Cassian commented, “how the past has a habit of repeating itself.” He was referring to the two young men who resembled themselves so much, and Rhys was inclined to agree.

As they walked up the familiar steps to the townhouse, their family started to bid their farewells. Kaden left first with Azriel and Mor, and Rhys was unsure whether it was going to be Eleana or the boy who ineluctably snuck out to see the other. Then it was Felix, who took Quathryn and Thea with him so Cassian and Nesta could linger and gossip. Lucien and Elain were going to stay in the House of Wind, but as they tried to winnow away a sudden leash was put on them – and not just them, but everyone left.

Rhys, Feyre, Nesta, Cassian, Elain, Lucien – they all turned as one to where Eleana stood on the threshold, her expression dark and her magic keeping them in place.

“The sitting room. Now. There’s things you need to know.” She turned, and they were all compelled to follow her. Not even Rhys could break the spell she had woven around them, and was forced, like his family, into his home.

They all sat on stiff dining chairs that were barely used, Eleana at the head of the table. “I’m sorry for doing it like this,” she said, “but I can’t have you running off without me showing you this.” Her voice turned anguished, and Rhys looked at her wide-eyed.

“Laya?” He reached out to hold one of her hands, but she crossed them under the table before he could.

“They are things you need to know about Kaden before you make any final judgements on him, not that your opinion could change my mind.” She looked them all over then.

Nesta and Cassian, both looking slightly irritated about not knowing what was going on. Feyre and Lucien, scared about the girl before them, and Elain, who didn’t seem fazed at all. Perhaps she knew this was coming.

Without another word, Eleana tapped on all their minds, wanting them to loosen their shields and invite her in. It was politeness more than anything, his Butterfly was powerful enough to force her way in if she wanted.

They all acquiesced, and then it was not through their eyes they were seeing, but through hers.

____

Dark room.

_Candle in the corner._

_Brute of a man keeping the child down with his foot to the centre of her back as he pulled violently on one of her wings. Her mouth full of gravel, and her screams so colossal her throat had started to bleed, the metallic taste filling her lungs alongside the dirt that had been shoved down her with a maniacal laugh._

_A puddle around her. Vomit. Blood. Piss. Not all her own._

_This is the Room. This is her nightmare._

Another day.

_The dark the same – swallowing, insistent, terrorizing. Nothing good happens in this Room._

_Her gums infected. Her hands trying to push away the pliers that a man is shoving in her mouth to rip out her teeth._

_For her good, he claimed._

_It was not for her good._

Another day, or maybe night _, and she was deathly tired. Her very bones ache like the unoiled tires of a cart, and she wanted to sleep. Is contented to on the cold floor. She is small. She has no choice._

_A laugh. A noose. A quashed yell as the air is scraping through her lungs as she loses her breath._

A day.

_Different. Not the Room, but a house. A familiar, sneering male leading her and her love into a room full of cocky men with egos that could fuel a war. It doesn’t matter. The golden boy is at her side, and she loves him. She loves him she loves him she loves him. Her mate. Her golden mate, with a heart full of sorrow that she was slowly replacing with felicity._

_A tour. Of the house. From a brother._

_Bottom to top, is that what he said?_

_Stairs going down. A basement._

_A room. The Room. Never a nightmare, but a memory – a glance through the eyes of a male she hadn’t met yet. A bond so strong it didn’t matter._

_A growl. A scampering host. An ashamed Kaden. He had never wanted her to see this._

_In response, a kiss. The second of many to come. A good thing in a foul place. A Room neither of them would ever return to._

A cave.

_Nails missing. Wounds a plenty. Skin bare and cold. Hair savagely cut._

_She looks up at the creature holding her captive, and is unsurprised to see that there is nothing there. She can’t see it. She will die here._

_Her back, her body, is held up by fragile wings that are in tatters and shreds. Tendons in muscles, her own, straining through her body like they might very might rip out through her back and she might slide to the floor. Only flesh and bone with a detached soul, forever meant to blindly wonder through this cave._

_A sigh. A loss of breath. Did she have a name? Surely she did once, but she can no longer remember it, that is,_ that is _, until it is muttered in front of her._

_Eleana?_

_A hand around her to hold her up, another on her face. Her name from his lips, a plea. She tries to open her eyes, she can’t, but she tries, for him. She’ll remember her name for him._

_The promise of a dance gets her attention. A dance at a wedding._

_Warmth, beautiful heat in this icy place as he heals her ever so slightly._

_She mumbles his name. He kisses the tip of her nose. She tells him to run._

_It’s here and its claws are in her mate._

_It doesn’t matter. With a loud thud, its head rolls._

_Her golden mate hacks at the chains holding her up, and she is free. She is in his arms, and she is in excruciating pain._

_She will never fly again._

Starfall.

_Broken body chains from gloriously wondering hands, interrupted by the creature they all thought dead._

_A tornado of fire and ash. A golden mat who is the only one that can see it. With her help, he kills it, slowly._

_Relief. It was over. It would no longer hunt her._

_Surprise. She’d thought it dead._

_Collapsed happily in the arms of her golden mate._

_Fury, as he told her that her family knew the creature as alive._

_She flees._

The night of a birth.

_Her golden mate anchoring himself through their bond without his knowledge. He’s using every ounce of strength he has to put the soul he found trying to go to the Other Side back into the infant body in a room full of desolation and confusion._

_He struggles. He collapses. He is looking through the eyes of the woman he loves – not that he’s told her he loves her._

_Through her, he guides the soul back into its body_

_And then_

_A cry_

_And she’s alive._

_____

 

Rhys’ hands were uncontrollably shaking as he was freed from Eleana’s memories, his head laying on the table in front of him. He had drooled slightly onto the blue table cloth, and dazedly wiped his mouth.

Next to him, Feyre was crying, her face in her hands and her shoulders slumped. He pulled her to him and she sobbed into his chest, grabbing onto his jacket lapels for dear life.

Across from him, Cassian was trying to calm a raging Nesta. She wasn’t mad, but she wasn’t in control of her emotions either. What caused her to be like this, Rhys didn’t know, and he was too shocked on his own accord to probe into her reasoning.  Perhaps it was that without Kaden her child would have died, and she had never even had the chance to thank him.

Lucien and Elain looked like they were going to be sick, and the only thing that held them back from vomiting all over the floor was their tight grip on each other’s hands.

And then there was Eleana, calming sitting at the head of the table like she hadn’t just refuted things they thought to be absolute truths.

“So it wasn’t Azriel and Felix that saved you that day?” Rhys’ voice cracked as he addressed his daughter.

“They were there, somewhere, but it was Kaden who saved me.”

“And the Room?”

“Visions I was getting from him.”

“And Th-Thea?” Rhys shakily got to his feet, letting his wife go.

“No medical help in the world could have brought her back. The Cauldron blessed us when I was given Kaden.”

Rhys took stepped towards his daughter, and she rose to give him a solid hug. “Do you see now, Papa? Why I love him so, and would even if he wasn’t my mate?”

“Yes, my little Butterfly, I understand.”

 


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so two things so be noted. Firstly, the first section of this with Rhys? Yeah, that was meant to be at the end of 24 and I completely forgot to put it in. My bad. Two, for the first time EVER I listened to music as I wrote one of the scenes. For max. impact, when Felix’s POV kicks in, listen to this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9PXLTLuuSE as you go. Thanks for reading lads!

Rhys swirled his drink with a spoon, enjoying watching the colours of his coffee mix together. He was waiting for Eleana to come home. Unsurprisingly, she had snuck out during the night to go be with her mate. He wasn’t not mad that she snuck out, not at all, he was disappointed. Not in her, but in himself, for making his daughter feel like she couldn’t just tell him that she wanted to go see her mate.

Soon enough though, he heard her quiet footsteps sneaking through the door, and very strangely, also the quiet whispers of his nephew and Kaden.

“Laya?” Rhys called to her as she was about to climb the stairs to her room. All three children turned to look at him, shocked looks in their faces.

“Father, what are you doing?”

Rhys stood, abandoning his drink on the table to approach the three younglings. “I think that question is better asked by me.”

After Eleana had revealed to everyone her history with Kaden, it had taken a while for his family to be calm enough to leave. Nesta and Cassian were especially upset. Here was this young man who had saved the life of their child, of their niece as well, and he had been living in squalor for the past year, an upgrade from the dungeon his family had kept him in. A man who had been unspeakably abused, and yet could still dance freely with the woman he loved. Cassian wanted to go straight to Kaden’s father, Azriel’s brother, and do to him what he’d wanted for years: kill the fucker. Nesta talked him down though, and said the death of that despicable man can only be granted by Kaden and Azriel, they deserved to pull the life from the already soulless male.

“It’s good we ran into you, actually.” Felix pushed in front of Eleana. His back was straight, hair strangely tidy, and clothes much more typical of fae than Illyrian – more composed, elegant. He was in diplomatic mode.

“Why is that?”

“Because we were convening so we could discuss a strategy to make you open the investigation into the creatures again.” 

Rhys raised his eyebrows, gesturing behind him for them to take a seat. “And why is that?”

The three young ones sat on the couch. Rhys sat across from them, hooking one leg on his knee with his hands resting in in his lap.

“Because it was stupid for you to stop in the first place,” Eleana muttered under her breath. Rhys knew he wasn’t supposed to hear it, so he didn’t bother responding.

“We have re-evaluated everything we gathered,” Kaden answered, “and we think that we have enough evidence to prove that something is going on. Having ourselves experienced what these creatures are like first-hand, a potential hull in activity seems more dangerous than if we could find newer sightings of them. The fact that they have suddenly stopped makes us think that something big is going to happen – if Az and Cassian hadn’t taken over from us when we gave you what we found, we would’ve realised much sooner and brought it to your attention.”

“It concerns us deeply,” Felix continued, “that we know, undoubtedly, that something sinister is happening in Prythian and that we have the opportunity to do something about it and we’re not.”

Rhys considered their words. He had poured over the files they had given him, over and over and over again. From a surface level, they did seem like they were related through the old children’s story book they had also provided. That’s where their evidence ended though. For the life of him, Rhys couldn’t validate everything they claimed. Some of the killings, definitely, but their link to the stories was often a stretch. The biggest hole in their tale was how much they claimed happened in Prythian’s sacred mountain. Rhys himself had gone, ready to destroy what had threatened his daughter, but there was nothing there they claimed to have seen. Absolutely nothing. The wards were the same, there were no tracks from animals, no inclination whatsoever that anyone or anything had been inside since it was originally sealed. With everything stacking against them, Rhys had decided that it wasn’t worth the resources to continue.

He did have an idea though.

“I’ll give you this,” he addressed Kaden directly. “You finish your trials, you pass, and when you come to Velaris you can lead the investigation. I’ll give you whatever you need, and you can do with these leads what you will.”

Kaden looked taken aback, and glanced at Felix and Eleana to gage their reactions.

“This would be under the supervision of Felix,” Rhys added.

Kaden looked relieved at that, and looked very intensely at Eleana. Another conversation Rhys wasn’t to be a part of, it seemed, but whatever they said led to Kaden looking at him and slowing nodding.

“You have yourself a deal, High Lord.”

_____

Eleana followed Kaden into his room, a sly smile on her face. He held her hand and was leading her forward, therefore he couldn’t predict her plans, but oh how she planned to say goodbye to him tonight.

She was horribly nervous, making her stomach full of food roll and twist in a nauseating way, and it was all because tomorrow Kaden would be starting the Bloodrite. A situation where he would be called to fight the most savage of Illyrians, a barbaric place where she could never dare to help him. He would be the youngest by far. Felix was, back when he competed to earn his tattoos, but Felix had always been superior to his counterparts. He was only in his twenties, and yet he had helped wage wars, led the Elite, done unspeakable work for the High Lord, and all because of how immaculate his Bloodrite was. He never acknowledged it, but Felix was a prodigy. She had no idea what the world would have to throw at him to bring him down.

Kaden, although mighty in his own right, was no Felix. That was no detriment to him, there was no other Illyrian that compared to her cousin, but her cousin was the only other person to complete the trials so young.

And she worried for Kaden.

But was also very, very turned on at the ideas of him having Illyrian tattoos.

“Azriel and Morrigan are asleep,” he told her, unaware of the scheming going on in her head. She wanted to say goodbye, or see you later, in a way he would cherish while away – a way that would make him want to come home to her as soon as he could.

She pushed the door shut behind him, Kaden not turning at the sound. He shrugged off his jacket and threw it over a chair – if that’s what you could even call it. It was a wide circular chair that swivelled, like a little pod, filled with cushions. It was in front of his window, so that it could always be facing the sun. He had bought it for her, claiming she needed a better reading spot than his bed. Cassian and Nesta, not knowing what else to do, had given Kaden a large sum of money since finding out what he did for Thea. They gave it to him so he could buy, or build, a home so he could leave his tent. And although he tried to refuse, he ultimately couldn’t, but he also was content to stay where he was for the time being. So instead he spoiled his family and lover. And part of that included the chair he had gifted to her.

He raised his shirt over his head and discarded it on the floor, gazing at the moon through his window as he then undid his belt. Eleana approached him and wove her arms around him from behind, kissing the spot between his wings – one of the few places with full feeling left on his scarred back. He leant into her, and she rested her head on his shoulder.

“Are you going to stay tonight?” he whispered.

In answer, she grazed his neck with her teeth.

He hummed contently, and turned his face enough to kiss her head. “This everyone-knowing-about-our-relationship thing is real’ handy, you didn’t even have to sneak out tonight.”

She laughed lowly, and started running her hands down his chest. “You’re quite tall, aren’t you?” she asked innocently.

“Indeed I am.”

“And very strong.” Her hands squeezed his biceps as she said it.

He nodded his agreement. It was true, after all.

“Then fucking me against the wall really shouldn’t be a problem.”

His dick twitched at the words, especially when she accompanied them with a small bite to his pointed ears and hands that effortlessly undid the button on his pants.

“That can be arranged.” He twisted around and captured her in a kiss, her surprised hands settling around his waist. He let his tongue sweep into her mouth, letting her know that if he had his way with her his tongue could be a truly magical thing. Not that she didn’t know – he had made her moan with it plenty of times. He tilted her head back with his hand, bettering the angle so he could deepen the kiss. He wasn’t satisfied though, and moved his lips to her neck.

“You are… glorious,” she breathed.

“I’ll fuck you against the wall, rose, but first I want to see _you_.” He stepped away from her, a smirk on his face.

She backed up to, her expression matching his, and undid her dress so it could fall to the floor. She only had these scandalous, white lace panties beneath, and with eyesight as good as his he could see the small wetness gathered there. He did that – his greatest accomplishment to date.

She discarded those, too, and his length became hard at the sight of her toned body.

She stepped forward, but he upraised a hand in protest. “That’s not what I meant.”

She cocked her head.

He brushed a wave of magic against her, focusing on her two most sensitive areas. Her legs tightened together at the sensation, and he saw her nipples become raised and hard.

“I want to see you touch yourself.”

Her breath shuddered, and she bit her lip and nodded. She stalked to the bed, sashaying her hips in a way she knew he was weak for, and sat facing him, far enough back so she could prop her feet up and open her legs, exposing herself fully to him while still being close to its edge. She gave him a wicked smile, and said his name as she let her fingers ever so slightly touch her centre. Then she did it again, but this time she stroked her fingers down harder – there was no illusion now that her moan was genuine and full of pleasure.

Kaden finally removed all his clothing, and with no patience started stroking himself in time with her, devouring the vision of her pleasuring herself. Her breathing became laboured, as did his, and her eyes fluttered closed as the circular motions she was making on her sensitive centre became faster. With one hand, she idly brushed her fingers up her stomach, padding lightly over nipples before pinching them hard, then kneading her breast. She looked at Kaden through her eyelashes, and his knees shook. So much so that he kneeled down in front of her, peppering a kiss to her inner thigh as he did.

He stopped touching himself in favour of devouring her instead, his favourite pass time. He wrapped his arms around her legs and pulled her forward, eliciting a quiet _oh!_ from Eleana.

“Are you close?” He raised himself up slightly to kiss the skin just below her navel.

She whimpered a yes, and in response he grabbed her hands away from her body and guided them instead to pull his hair. He was inches away from her, when her voice stopped him.

“I – I wanted to do this for you. To focus on you.” Her voice was an unfinished whine, the kind that only ever emitted from a female on the precipice of an orgasm. She propped herself up on her elbows to talk to him. As she looked at him, the way her lips parted and hips slightly moved, it made him think that just the sight of him between her legs made her nearly come.

As he spoke, a pressed a finger in a straight line down her middle. “There is nothing more satisfying to me than this. Than the noise you make when I’m inside you, the way you choke on your words when I use my tongue, how you scratch me and bite me to mark that I am yours.”

She shivered at his words and lied back down. “Then do your worst.”

He replaced his lone finger with his mouth.

She gasped deeply, her back arching and her hands going behind her head to fist the bed sheets. He smiled as he worked her tongue on her deliciously wet centre – she always did that when he tasted her, whatever she could grab a hold onto. Sheets, a headboard, a rug, the leg of his piano, the curtain of a dressing room, sometimes her breasts. If she didn’t have something to grasp, then she took longer to finish. And right before he did make her come, she would stretch her fingers then fist them – again and again – and then she’d scream or moan his name.

Just like she was now.

Kaden wondered how she would react if he was to tie her hands in a way where she couldn’t do that.

Her thighs tightened around his head, and with one final flick of his tongue she was done. He wasn’t though – she wanted something from him, and he was determined to give it to her, a parting gift before the Bloodrite.

When he stood and looked down at her, she was smiling happily, her hair spread around her and her hands tangled in it. He reached out a hand and helped pull her up into a sitting position, smiling back at her.

He hooked her arm around his neck and bent down, sliding his hands under her thighs and in one swift movement he picked her up. “Now about that wall…”

She looped her arms around his neck and legs around his waist. “ _Please_ ,” she smirked.

He walked with her in his arms until she was pressed against the wall, not yet entering her. First, he lowered her slightly so they were perfectly aligned. Then he adjusted his tight grip on her thighs.

As he did this, her head rolled back in anticipation, her legs wrapping around him tighter just to feel some sort of friction.

Her breaths became short and sharp as he pushed his considerable length into her – it was the perfect angle to hit her in exactly the right spot. As he thrust into her, he also pushed her harder into the wall, slamming her into it in a way that would be impossible to do if she’d had her wings out.

More satisfying than having her in the first place was hearing her whimper his name as she grew towards another climax, her hands tightening on his shoulders and head thrown back, a perfect part in her lips. It was lucky the walls in his room were warded to be soundproof, as the exquisite noises Eleana was making were loud enough to wake the whole city.

Kaden leaned forward and pulled her bottom lip with his teeth. He had yet to bite her the way she sometimes did to him, and as he moved his hips in time with hers he thought he very might die if he did the Bloodrite without knowing what it was like. So as she gasped and went taut around him as he brought her to the edge and pushed her over it, he lowered his head and bit into the soft skin between her shoulder and neck.

She was like a candle sparking to flame, her skin aglow from his touch.

Kaden was different.

The moment he tasted her blood, he stopped. It was like he was incapable of moving – or not. Instead of finishing, he pushed away from her and to his knees, clutching his now pounding head in his hands. His brain felt like it had been stunned, his eyes shut as they were burning. He could hear muffled calls from Eleana, distantly felt her hands on his face, his back. Every scent was intensified, especially the smell of her skin and the moisture between her legs. He was sweating – hard – and the drops rolling down his back were the only thing he could immediately feel. When he did finally open his eyes, everything was hazy, like a film has been placed over his iris’. The only thing in focus was Eleana, who looked hysterical.

He saw her mouth moving with perfect clarity, saw it forming the shape of his name but could not hear her words. She ran from him then, throwing on one of his shirts and a pair of his shirts, intending to leave to get help.

But he grabbed her hand as she passed him and pulled her to him. He could hear her now, she was worried and confused, so he just held her. She held him back, as firmly as she could, one hand clutching around his torso and the other losing itself in his hair.

He didn’t know what was happening, or why. One moment, he had been in the throngs of passion, and now he felt like his heart was clawing his insides, desperate to escape the confines of his chest.

He didn’t know what was happening.

Eventually, he regained the strength that had been suddenly stolen from him and let Eleana guide him to his bed. She helped him lie and then slid in next to him, curling against his side.

She waited a few minutes for his body to become normal, then asked, “What just happened?”

He turned to his lady love, unprepared to answer. Honestly, he wasn’t sure what had happened, but he did feel the need to pull her closer to him, half across his chest with their faces across from each other. With her on top of him, he felt instantly better.

Her neck was bruised, and he could see the puncture marks he had made there. He reached up and pressed the area with a finger, testing to see how tender it was. When she didn’t grimace or flinch, he assumed it meant that his actions had been okay. He had never marked her the way she did him.

“Does it hurt?” he asked her.

She shook her head, propping herself up on her elbow so she could look down on him. “Are you seriously fretting about me right now when that just happened? Kaden, I’m worried. Should I go get Felix, a healer? It’s the night before the Bloodrite-”

He silenced her with a kiss, feeling monumentally better. “I don’t know what happened, but I’m fine now. It was like my body snapped, but it’s all okay now. But what about this?” He tucked her hair behind her ear then ran his hand down her neck, sending healing magic through the hurt. He may be content to let his marks heal on their own, but she never marked him in such obvious places. He was in a good place with the High Lord and Lady, and he could imagine how drastically that would change if they saw _that_ on her neck.

His other hand wandered down her body, sliding underneath the shirt she was wearing so it could settle on her lower back. “Did you like it?” He accompanied his question with a kiss to the wound.

She shifted atop him. “Yes.”

The hand on her back went lower, underneath the shorts to grope her ass. Her breathing hitched, and he could tell she was becoming aroused again. “We shouldn’t,” she said. “Not after what just happened.”

“How did it feel?” He kissed her neck again.

She groaned, but in impatience. “No, Kaden. Let’s sleep. You need to be up bright and early.”

“I don’t know what I did,” he said gently.

“What you did?”

“To have a woman like you. To feel a love like this. I didn’t even know it possible, but here we are. I’m not scared of the Bloodrite, I’m scared of myself. I’m scared at how much I would do for you, at how much you mean to me. I… I couldn’t imagine a life without you in it. I love you, so much.”

Her expression became tender, and she rested her forehead on his. “When you bit me, I had never been so aroused in my life. Had never felt an orgasm so strongly.” Her words were whispered, as if the air around them was listening in and she only wanted him to hear. “Now sleep.” She patted his chest and snuggled into him.

____

 

Kaden was silent as Felix strapped down his wings, binding them to his body and rendering them useless. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling, but at least he still had his arms.

He had said his goodbyes to everyone that morning, and he meant _everyone._ Felix’s whole family had shown up, all offering advice and luck. The High Lord had given him a firm hand shake and wished him the best, and Cassian had smothered him in a hug. Mor had very subtly and quietly shaken with fear, and Azriel affirmed that Kaden was ready and hugged him briefly. Eleana was last, and even though they had spent the whole night together he still held onto her tightly, and wiped away her tears of worry as she wept. He held her for a while, long enough for Felix to be the only one left once they were done. You were only allowed to have one person accompany you to the Bloodrite, and Kaden had chosen his best friend and commander. He didn’t realise that meant though that the whole Elite would meet him at the camp before the trials began, his whole team also giving advice and helpful anecdotes from their time in the Bloodrite. Kaden would be the last of the Elite to receive his tattoos.

And now he was here, one in a swarm of thousands of bloodthirsty Illyrians ready to prove themselves in the most brutal way.

The dust around them was swirling from all the feet shifting. Autumn may have come, but the base of the mountains had yet to lose the essence of summer.

“How are you feeling?” Felix questioned, inspecting Kaden’s binds.

“Kinky.”

“I’m being serious.”

Kaden laughed and patted Felix on the shoulder. “I’m feeling fine. If you and Azriel believe I’m ready then I’m ready. You’d never let me walk into a death trap.”

Felix, although being completely supportive, was still acting strange. Or not strange per se, but sad. Felix knew that once Kaden got his tattoos, that was it. He would still be an honorary member of the Elite, but that chapter of his life would be concluded when he moved to Velaris to restart the investigation and begin his training with the Inner Circle.

Kaden knew Felix couldn’t control what he was feeling – and he also knew he wanted no part in making him feel that way.

“It’s just a week – I can handle it. Do me a favour, though?”

“Whatever you want.”

“Would you move my stuff from the tent into my room? I don’t know whether I can be bothered doing it when this week is over or not.”

Felix nodded numbly. “I’ll give it all to Azriel during the week.”

“Why would you give it to Azriel?”

“Because I’m not overly keen on just waltzing into his house.”

“Felix, when this is over I plan on living with _you_.”

Felix’s eyes widened, and he gave Kaden an incredulous look. “Fuck off. I don’t need you moving in with me out of pity – I told you, I’ll sort my shit out.”

Kaden rolled his eyes and started stretching out his arms, getting used his restricted wings. “I’m not doing it out of pity you ass. I want to live with you.”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, and I’m not, but you’ve told me multiple times you will never move in with me, and have rejected me every time I’ve insisted. So you know what? Invitation rescinded. You can’t live with me.”

Kaden laughed lightly at the look on his friend’s face. “Training and living in Velaris sounds great on paper, but my whole life I’ve lived as an Illyrian. To suddenly shove that all away, to go from where I was to living in one of the most luxurious houses in the city, is too much too soon. I also don’t think I could get through it all if I didn’t have you right there ready to help me.”

Felix tapped him on the nose. “Eleana will be in Velaris. Are either of us under the illusion that she won’t leave the moment you do? Go to Velaris, Kaden. Be with Eleana, and live the life you always deserved and should’ve had.”

Horns started ringing, a signal that the warriors needed to start congregating around the entrances. Kaden huffed, he should’ve started this conversation earlier. He forgot how bloody stubborn Felix could be.

“I love Eleana, but I’m not ready to live on her doorstep. There’ll be days I stay with her, days I stay with Azriel, but I want to know I have a home still. Get my room ready, Felix. I’m not taking no for an answer.”

Kaden could tell his brother-in-arms was trying to supress a grin. “Alright.”

With that, they farewelled each other with a hug.

Kaden walked with his fellow Illyrians, all ready to run into the mountains as soon as the signal was given.

It was quite the sight.

Thousands of warriors alone were going into this entrance, Kaden a single bee in a thriving hive. They all blended together, him sticking out like a single sun flower in a field of lavender. You could see his blonde hair from anywhere, it was uncommon among the Illyrians as desertion – it rarely happened, and when it did it was notable.

The mountains themselves were just like any other, it was their insides that made them infamously sinister. The Bloodrite, held every five years, was always done here. Inside was kilometres of caverns and tunnels, all interconnected with the other mountains. Once they were inside, the entrances were sealed shut with magic provided by the High Lord. Somewhere around here High Lord Rhysand was patiently waiting to lock them inside. When the week was over, he would come back and signal to the people inside, who at this point had been living in darkness and without seasons or time for a week, that it was time to exit. Those who had lived through the ancient ceremony would be immediately given their tattoos, and those who died would be fished out within the next few days.

Kaden didn’t recognize anyone near him, and he refrained from making eye contact. The High Lord, Cassian, and Azriel had all warned him of the same thing.

_You look different. There will be Illyrians who know your father and your brothers. You’re half fae. You’ll have a target on your back the moment you step foot into the mountains. Tread cautiously._

Kaden should be heeding their warnings, but as they were all herded into the entrance to the mountain there was only one place his mind went. He still had no idea what had happened to him last night. Well, he had one theory. But it was preposterous, and he would have to talk to Eleana about it.

Eleana.

His chest pinched at the thought of her. He laughed through his nose, garnering strange looks from the Illyrians around him. But it was too funny not to – it had only been a few hours and he already missed her more than anything. He was ridiculous.

In time with their heavy footsteps, drums started banging from all corners of the mountain, joining the already blasting horns.

It was time.

The beat got faster and faster, until all at once the entrances were open and the Illyrians hurtled inside.

Kaden sprinted, wanting to explore the caverns and find the best vantage point possible for the next seven days. He would not actively try to kill anyone, but if a situation arose where it was life or death? He would not hold back. You may not be allowed any magic in the mountains, but with his training he didn’t need any.

He was going to move in with Felix.

He was going to find his mother.

He was going to stop the creatures in Prythian.

He was going to prove his father and brothers wrong.

He was going to teach Eleana to dance. She was going to be so good that whenever she saw dancers on the streets she would no longer feel ashamed or scared to join them.

He was going to kill anyone that stood in the way of that vision.

He said those mantras in his head repeatedly as the entrances opened and Illyrians ran and shoved into the mountains. Let the games begin.

____

It did not take long for the Illyrians to disperse. It was mostly dark, but the occasional torch was hung on the wall, placed permanently there with magic. That did not stop Illyrians killing each other for them.

Kaden had quickly learnt to fear what eternal darkness could do to a man.

From the spot he had settled in, he often saw groups of Illyrians that had allied marching past, looking for either more team members or for opponents. Kaden had been sneaking along when he noticed some strange shadows forming on the top of the wall. Upon close inspection, he could see a small alcove had been either naturally made or dug out. It was the best spot he had cased yet, so he ran and jumped up the wall, grabbing onto its edge to pull himself up. It ended up being smaller than he thought, only tall enough for him to crouch and only big enough for one person. He could lay, though, which gave him a space where he could sleep.

It was also handy, as he could eavesdrop on anyone that came past. The majority of conversations so far had been mundane, but a few had been of interest.

A group of four had walked past, talking about how their only goal in the Bloodrite was to murder a member of their squadron who had been caught, and not punished for, preying on young women. A pair was planning on killing their cousin, so that they would inherit their frail uncles land. There were four men who looked ready to brutalise, speaking about killing anyone they saw.

It was going to be an interesting week.

____

Three days passed non-eventfully, but Kaden had no doubt the stories about the Bloodrite were not exaggerated or over-dramatized. He would explore during what he thought were the days, and crept back to his crevice to sleep at night. So far, the most valuable place he had found was a natural water reserve an hour away. The first thing he’d done was drink deeply, and then he’d used it to make mud to smear over his blonde hair, making it less obvious when he was hiding. He had made very subtle tracks as he explored, so that he could find his way back if need be. If anyone else saw them, they were easily explained away as rodent tracks. He had made some in random directions as well, and could tell the difference between the decoys and actual ones by the distance between the would-be toes.

He’d scarcely eaten, but what he had had been rodents he’d cooked over the torches or insects. It wasn’t a meal worthy of Velaris, but it would do for now. It made him miss Felix’s cooking, but then he remembered he would soon be able to have it every day, and his feelings eased.

At this moment, he was in his crevice lying on his stomach, looking down at the cavern below him. He dipped his head back though when he heard scuffling, lest someone see him. With his now dark hair, he wouldn’t be as visible to those below unless they looked for him, but few people were scanning the ceilings the way they should be. Especially in the foreboding darkness.

He squinted to see who was below, and although he could hear lumbering, dragging footsteps, he could not see anyone. There was a twinge in his stomach though at the sound, a familiar dread he couldn’t quite put his finger on. And then he heard a slight echo in the distance, a strange clicking.

He ever so slightly scooted back in his crevice, flying rather than fighting whatever group of Illyrians were on their way, and buckled down for the night.

He had been in and out of a fitful sleep when he heard haggard breathing from below. Curiosity getting the better of him, he looked over to see a half-dead male dragging himself along the ground, covered in blood.

Kaden could hear no other noise, so, against his better judgement and at the wrath he would inevitably incur from Felix, he swiftly crept down to help the fellow solider. Another piece of advice he hadn’t asked for was to help no one. He had been assured that he had no allies, but Kaden was not one to let the innocent die.

He approached the man, his haggard breaths only hitching from the amount of pain he was in. At hearing Kaden’s footsteps, he looked up, and Kaden’s stomach turned as he saw the man was missing one eye – it had obviously been gouged out recently.

“What happened to you?” Kaden asked as he bent to his knees.

The man, probably only a decade or two older than Kaden, was too weak to reply, and slumped on the ground. From closer, Kaden could see he had other injuries. His back had been savagely clawed, and segments of his wings were shredded. And his foot was… gone. From the looks of the ankle left behind, it was forcefully pulled off.

What Illyrian, no matter the agenda, could do such a thing?

Kaden tried to heal the man, but his magic had been cut off. High Lord Rhysand had made sure all magic became obsolete with the closing of the entrances. So instead, he used the binding from the male’s wings to tie the wounds as best he could to slow the bleeding.

He was silent as he worked, but the male wasn’t. He was desperately trying to say something, but no words were making their way from his mouth, just pained moans. Kaden, gently, told the man to be quiet and preserve his strength.

It quickly became clear that there was nothing Kaden could do. Try as he might, and as much as he hated himself for it, this man was going to die. Kaden thought he was ready for the possibility of witnessing death while in these mountains – he had come to discover he was not.

“Sir?” he addressed the man.

He got a humpf in response.

“There is nothing I can do for you, and with so many days left…” Kaden stopped his thought. He breathed a shuddered breath, and offered him mercy. “Would you like me to kill you?”

The man may be weak, but he still had steal in his glassy eyes. With what was likely his only remaining strength, he nodded, but first said, “No… Illyrian… don’t… west t-tunnels.”

A warning of some sort.

“Okay.” Kaden hands shook as he held the hand of the Illyrian, and started reciting ancient Illyrian prayers, meant to send the man’s soul peacefully to the Other Side. Whether Kaden believed in the words or not, the man seemed relieved to be hearing them. And as Kaden said the final verse, and his hands moved from the male’s hands to his throat, his final words were punctuated with the sound of the male’s neck snapping.

Kaden forgot to ask his name.

He moved the body some ways away. He would return for it when it was time to leave, but for now the last thing he needed was a rotting corpse. Kaden felt sick from the experience, and mulled the male’s warning over in his head countless times. What he gathered was that whatever Illyrian had attacked him was residing in the tunnels to the west. But at this point, Kaden didn’t actually know what direction _was_ west. There were ways to tell, he knew from Azriel’s story of his Bloodrite, but all he had was the story, not instructions on how to do what Azriel did. He honestly had no idea how Azriel managed not only to navigate this place, but to find his brothers while doing so.

Felix would’ve been able to figure it out.

He drew patterns in the fine, loose rocks that covered his crevice, thinking of the family he was returning to.

More than anything, he wanted to return to his – wanted to return to Eleana. To speak with her, and lay with her. Not with any intentions, just to close his eyes and feel the heat of her skin and drown in her scent.

He was a water wraith, and she was a priceless jewel he couldn’t stop until he had.

Kaden did not want to be like the dead Illyrian he just shoved in a corner somewhere.

_____

Day six, and it was eerily quiet.

No Illyrians had come past, no rats or insects. Kaden had to abandon his crevice because he had to go so far to hunt. Occasionally, he heard screams echoing through the rocky tunnels around him, but that was to be expected. He welcomed the violence if it meant he wasn’t alone. But never did he run into another soldier. Or should he say live solider? There were bodies littered everywhere.

His stomach had not stopped churning since he’d heard the bizarre thumping and clicking of the group of Illyrians that likely killed the nameless male, and at this point, as Kaden ventured deeper into the mountains, he hoped to run into more people.

And he didn’t.

When he should have.

The beads of sweat that ran down his back were not from heat or exertion. They were from nerves. He didn’t know if he had genuine reason to be afraid or if the darkness was consuming him and turning him mad, but either way his body was rigid and ready to defend.

Only one more day. Or was it? It was hard to tell the time in a place like this.

Torches that were once lit were now extinguished. Sometimes, Kaden would go hours with nothing but his fingers running along the walls to guide him.

He was washing.

Kaden retraced his steps to the springs he’d found. In his lonesome, he decided it wasn’t a terrible idea to bathe, to scrub the grit off him. Eleana would be there to welcome him once he came out, and he wanted to be in a state where he could take her instantly. Or, he would wait until he got his tattoos, and then winnow her away to let her have her way with him.

She would likely take control, and he loved it when she did. Loved it when she clawed his chest as she rode him.

He didn’t usually think about her this often, but since their last night together, she had been a constant in his thoughts. Not that she wasn’t usually – there just used to be moments where he wasn’t all-consumed by her, but they weren’t nearly as fun.

But he was digressing.

The water came up to his hips, and he dipped down to wash his face and scrub his hair. So far, the Bloodrite had not been what he’d expected. He had seen some atrocities, but had not faced the ones Azriel and Felix were convinced he would. He snorted, he wasn’t as important as they thought he was. Azriel’s Bloodrite had been as bloody as it was because of his relationship with the future High Lord and with the most powerful Illyrian in an age. Felix’s because he had something to prove, and there were a lot of elders out there who didn’t like the fact that there was another Cassian in their midst, and from a family with already infinite power too. Felix had won their respect, but he fought tooth and nail to do so.

As he was getting rid of the last traces of dirt from his skin, his ears perked up at the sound of someone coming. And not someone from the sounds of it, but multiple people.

He turned towards the arched entrance to the water room, and watched as a group of ten, maybe more, sprinted past without even looking in his direction.

But that’s not what’s peculiar.

It doesn’t matter that they ran past him, but to run past _water?_

They were fleeing from something.

Kaden got out of the water, shaking off and jogging in the direction the other Illyrians ran. A group of so many bolting was not a good sign, and he didn’t want to stick around to see what might have made them all so fearful.

He could hear their footsteps and indiscernible voices, and see them in the light of the intermittent torches. He sped up slightly so that as he ran he might be able to understand what they were frantically saying.

 _“What the fuck was that?”_ someone hissed.

“I don’t know – fuck, I’ve never seen something like that in my life. And _Pauly_ , fuck. He didn’t stand a chance.”

Kaden heard a cracked sob, wondering if this Pauly was the attacker or the victim.

“Monsters like that shouldn’t fucking exist. And Jamie, he just died. I watched at he was torn in half by _nothing_. There was _nothing there_.”  

Kaden’s heart started racing, and not because he was running. He thought for two seconds, weighing the cost of what he was about to do.

He did it, despite his reservations.

He called out to the group, shouting to get their attention. It worked, and they skidded to a halt, all bracing themselves for an attack they were sure was going to come.

One male stepped forward, the oldest by the looks of it, and scanned Kaden up and down. “What do you want?” he sneered.

Kaden raised his arms non-threateningly. “I just need to know what you saw back there.”

The clicking. The sinking feeling in his stomach. The lack of life. The warning not to go to the west.

_No Illyrian._

That is what the nameless man said to him.

Meaning, it had not been an Illyrian that had hurt him.

That was three days ago, and Kaden no longer thought it a coincidence that in that time all traces of life disappeared.

“Why should we tell you?” the male spat. “I know who you are, _what_ you are. I should kill you now and get the reward your brothers are so generously offering.”

Kaden nodded. “You could do that.” He swallowed hard. It shouldn’t surprise him that his brothers would pay for his death even after all this time – it’s not like they could accomplish it on their own. Felix and Azriel were right to lose sleep over him. “But if I suspect correctly, and what you tell me is that there are creatures back there, things that shouldn’t exist, that defy possibility and reason, then I might be our only shot out of here.”

The male’s breathing was laboured. “Follow us, it’s not safe here.”

____

 

They ran for hours, and only stopped because half of them were injured and could no longer continue. Kaden sat with them, waiting for the most opportune time to hit them with questions.

He didn’t have to ask.

“There was something off from the get-go. We were meant to meet up with a team from the west mountains, but they never got here,” the male from before explained. He was sitting with his legs crossed with his head in his hands. “We didn’t think anything of it, just bypassed the meeting point and went more their way. We could tell by the colour and texture of the rock that we had made it to a new mountain range, and we soon started to worry for our comrades. Bodies were turning up everywhere, more than we had been warned there would be.”

Another male came to sit by them, two feet shorter than Kaden and a long braid down his back. “They weren’t just dead either. Some of them were gaunt in a way I had never seen before, and others were arranged ornamentally. At my camp, I was an apprentice embalmer and I have never in all my days seen bodies that looked like that.”

“Although we all felt trepidation at the thought of continuing, we thought maybe it was just some test being thrown our way. We continued on, and that’s when we were attacked.”

Kaden furrowed his eyebrows. “What was it – or what did it look like?”

“There were three things, we think,” the braid said. “I swear there was something there doing unspeakable things that we couldn’t see. The other two… one was small, maybe the size of a dog, but it was scaly, and rather than walking it hopped on two legs. It’s knees though, they bent the wrong way, and its mouth was like – was like a Venus Fly Trap. Its tail was long and thick like a python, and just as deadly as the rows of teeth it had. The other thing, I – I could’ve sworn that before it killed Pauly it did something else, in his head. He was yelling bloody murder to things that weren’t there – that couldn’t possibly be there.”

Kaden’s chest constricted, and he held his breath so as not to alarm the others of his terror.

It was Felix that had first presented the idea that maybe the reason why the creatures had become dormant, and why Azriel and Rhys couldn’t find them, was that whatever was creating them was lying low, gathering strength for a large-scale attack rather than sequential small ones.

Kaden believed his brother to be correct. And it seemed that the creatures were here, now, locked in this mountain with them.

And from the sounds of it…

Another Impeath.

Another Colloden.

Cauldron knew what else.

“We need to get the fuck out of here,” Kaden told them. “I’m familiar with these creatures, and no one in these mountains stands a chance. We’re mice in a snake den.”

“How are you familiar with them?” braid asked.

“You said you know who I am, then you would know I’m a member of the Elite. Felix Warbringer is also a close confidant of mine, and the Heir Eleana is my – is the greatest love I’ve ever known. Anything they know I know. We will die here if we don’t leave.”

There was a beat of silence. “So the rumours are true,” the original male sniggered, “the Heir has fallen into bed with another half-breed, a bastard at that. Alright then, Kaden, but no matter what you say we have another day before the Bloodrite is over. How do you propose we live that long? Because I saw what those monsters are capable of, and no one will survive the night.”

“We get us and everyone else the fuck out of here early.”

Braid scoffed. “Fuck off. There’s no way to open it from the inside.”

Kaden frowned. “Oh, there’s a way.”

As Kaden mulled over how to get out, the group rested. He had been right in his previous estimate, it was a group of ten, most injured and all exhausted. So exhausted, that when he’d asked who was going to be a lookout, they said it was pointless, and they should all just sleep while they could. The training in Kaden was affronted, and so he stayed awake to watch for anything suspicious.

His eyes started to droop, so he rubbed his hands on his face to try and wake up. He yawned loudly, and in the back of his mind wondered why he was so tired. Even after the run, he should still be right to go. He was so exhausted that his vision had started to become wavy and fogged, and his eyelids so heavy that he could barely keep his eyes open.

What the fuck was happening?

He tried to stand, but stumbled when he did.

Then, out of the corner of his eye, he saw things slithering up to him and the others. His heart raced in alarm, but before he had the chance to call out, the creatures, four of the dog sized things that had been described to him before, pounced on two sleeping Illyrians – killing them instantly. Their jaws opened impossibly wide, snapping down and tearing flesh from bone, feasting on their vulnerable targets.

The others awoke, but with no weapons and with so many incapacitated, half of them were dead before their eyes opened.

Kaden looked on in shock at the slaughter in front of him, and did that only the he could possibly think of. Not just to save himself, but the thousands of Illyrians that will die if they remain in these mountains.

_____

 

Felix leant against the doorframe, watching as Eleana and Rhys participated in a very intense game of cards.

“You’re done for old man, just let go,” Eleana goaded.

“Oh young one, how little you know.”

Eleana laughed and looked to Felix, winking at him before going back to her game.

She had been especially happy lately, and although Felix knew she was still fearful of the outcome of the Bloodrite, she at least knew Kaden was alive. Magic barred in the mountains or not, nothing could stop the tether between mates.

Tomorrow he would have his friend home, and they would be able to celebrate through the night. Eleana, being the busy body she was, knew Kaden had decided to reside with him for the foreseeable future, and had already invaded his home to decorate and re-vamp Kaden’s will-be bedroom. She also ordered Felix to start learning how to cook in quantities of three, because she was going to be over. A lot.

Felix was watching her smile at her father, happy that she was so content, when her face fell.

She flinched back as if someone was yelling at her, and her eyes widened in panic.

“Laya?” Rhys leaned forward. “Butterfly? What is it?”

“Oh my – Fuck. Shit.” She whipped her head to Felix, her cousin tensing and coming to her side. “Kaden, he – the creatures, they’re there. They’re killing all the Illyrians.”

Felix swallowed hard, hands shaking at her rested them on her shoulders.

“The creatures are where, Eleana?” Rhys asked for clarification.

“They moved mountains, Father. When you sealed the soldiers in for the Bloodrite, you sealed them in too. It’s a massacre.” She stood, her gaze unfocused and darting around. She started pacing around the room, pulling on her hair and biting her lips.

“ _Eleana_.” Rhys followed her and grabbed her wrists, stopping her from pulling out her hair. “Tell me everything. Now.”

Felix was petrified on two fronts: his best friend was trapped with things that could easily kill him, and his uncle might not believe it.

“He – he’s there, and they were attacked, and the creatures are everywhere. They have to get out of the mountains.” She looked to Felix. “There’s another Colloden. But without his magic, he can’t see it. Oh rutting Gods.” She bowed her head. “What can we do? Father, please believe me, believe us. You have to help.” She looked up at him then, her eyes centred on him. “Let me show you.”

Felix stood aghast as Eleana let Rhys riffle through her mind to see what Kaden was showing her. His uncles face paled, and he saw his throat bob as it hit him how truly dire the situation was.

“Felix, get Cassian to prepare the war lords. We’re opening the mountains, now. As for you, prepare the legions to help evacuate the mountains. The Bloodrite is officially over.”

“As you wish.” Felix nodded and turned on his heels to winnow to his father, but Eleana’s scared voice halted him.

“What can I do, Father?”

“Nothing,” was Rhys’ strained response. “Under no circumstances are you to enter the mountains.”

“But Father!”

“I said no. You can come with me, and help me take down the wards and kill any creature that tries to exit with the Illyrians – that’s all.”

“But Kaden – I have to find him.”

Rhys brought his daughter into his arms. He looked pained for words, understanding Eleana’s need to rescue her mate but also not wanting to put her in any danger.

Before Rhys could suggest a solution, Felix interjected. “I’ll get him, Laya, don’t worry. I know how to navigate that place like it’s my back yard.”

The two sets of purplish eyes landed on him.

“Thank you,” gasped Eleana.

“You’ll need backup,” stated Rhys.

Felix shook his head at both of them. “Stay safe, Laya, don’t do anything reckless. And I think I’m better off going on my own. The less people to look after the quicker I’ll be.” He spun to leave, and said over his shoulder as he left, “tell me when the wards are down. I’ll be waiting.”

_____

 

Felix waited at the door to enter the mountains, receiving constant updates from Eleana. He was surrounded by war lords in a frenzy, anxious to get their soldiers out of such an unnecessarily dangerous situation. There would be very limited people entering the mountains. Once the doors were open and magic was functional again, Rhys, Feyre and Eleana will send out vast messages to any survivors, guiding them out and making sure they actually leave. They would all be assured that they, even though leaving early, had successfully completed the Bloodrite. 

Besides Felix, there were three other squadrons entering, all special operations in reconnaissance. One would be tasked with observing and gathering information on the creatures, and both others main objectives was to capture any creatures live to bring them out and study. Both teams had about fifty, and Felix knew, as did they, that those numbers would likely be halved from a threat of this size. But that was part of being Illyrian. They knew the risk going in.

Felix closed his eyes and let the turmoil around him fade away, letting the killing calm bring his body to a heightened buzz. His senses went into overdrive: he could hear the blood thrumming through the veins of the people around him, could feel every thread of his clothing being pressed to his skin and the weight of his weapons pulling him to earth, could taste the bitterness in the air, and could smell the metallic scent of blood as he neared the entrance.

He stood with his arms crossed, patiently waiting to save his brother.

When Eleana gave him the signal he could go in, he was like a hurricane of fire.

Felix was aware that there were creatures that he would not be able to see, and as a preventative measure, he wrapped himself in his vibrant red and orange flames that the Cauldron had gifted his half fae ass, coded so that no fae or Illyrian could be licked by its heat.

As Felix walked into the darkness, the shadows convulsing at the light, he unhinged himself. The power he usually kept at check was now unveiled and at its full capacity. His killing power was sent like a pulse through the caverns, sweeping the area for any sign of life – attacking anything unsavoury or savage.

He was like an untamed beast in a maze filled with demons – let’s see who wins.

As he walked, he noticed a staggering amount of bodies to the west. Figuring Kaden had common sense, he headed east. Every hundred metres or so, Felix would bellow Kaden’s name. He knew his friend was alive, and he also knew that Kaden would be looking for him. They would meet somewhere in the middle, and then Felix could help him escape this damned place.

Felix felt like a fool as he prowled deeper into the mountains.

He should have predicted that this would happen. These creatures, and whatever was creating them, always resided in rocky, cavernous areas. The Impeath that had nearly killed him was Under the Mountain, the Colloden that had taken and toyed with Eleana was in a cave, the stampede that Eleana was nearly trampled by were all Under the Mountain too.

He knew, he fucking _knew_ , that whatever phenomenon this was wasn’t over and that they should be expecting a larger scale attack soon. And he didn’t even fucking consider that the Bloodrite would be the perfect opportunity to strike the Illyrians – a group that had been largely targeted before.

If something happened to Kaden, he would never forgive himself.

He started to run, his flames still whipping around him like a shield, and Felix was sickened by the amount of death around him. The creatures had thoroughly scoured the mountains and at every twist and turn Felix was confronted with the ravaged corpses of Illyrians. He had seen hundreds at this point, and it just made him scream louder for his friend.

Sometimes he would pass people who were alive and running for dear life. They may have their magic back, but without weapons or siphons the killing power was a risky game to play in such confined quarters. He would shout at them where to go, and having usually recognized him, they swiftly did as he asked.

Felix had foregone is siphons today. He knew in a mood like this he would just shatter them.

He rounded another corner, slowing down. Up ahead and to his left he could hear water trickling, and if he knew Kaden, then Kaden would have been here throughout the week. On the ground, he could see where a group of people had very quickly run in this direction, and small puddles – at least one of those people had been bathing when they’d decided to make a hasty retreat. 

He followed those footsteps at a much faster rate than he had been going before, conscious of how long it had been since Kaden had called for Eleana’s aid through their mate bond.

“ _KADEN_ ,” he shouted again, his voice becoming hoarse.

He burst out another wave of his killing power, and halted in his tracks when after the blow he heard a symphony of whines and cries.

And not from any person.

He slowed down, unstrapping the sword from his back.

He had wounded whatever lied ahead, but they were not dead. With his feet dragging in the dirt, he braced himself for whatever was to come. He let his fire dull slightly, still aflame so that there was light cast, but not so full in case he lost control in this fight.

Then he heard them.

Clicking and clawing they were a catastrophe coveting calamity. He felt water drip from the ceiling on his face, and he wiped it away with a sneer.

And then he saw them.

Unimaginable, innumerable monsters all intent on him.

From all around him, pressing in on him like a fist constricting a throat, there was creature after creature, teeth snapping and growling as they saw him.

One lunged.

He brought his sword down in a hard stroke, the metal slicing into the thing’s scaly flesh, causing it to make a high-pitched screech. He pulled his sword out, kicking its dying body away from him while simultaneously pulling a throwing knife from his boot and aiming it at his next target. It struck true, but that was only two down in what could have been a hundred. As Felix pivoted around, he was overwhelmed in the swarm of creatures coming for him. With a hand raised, he sent his fire at its highest capacity towards everything to his left. The smell of burning flesh filled his lungs, but Felix did not let it distract him – nor did he let his flames whither. More droplets landed on him, and he let them run down his face as he grimaced. Staying in the same spot, he focused on the creatures to his back. Breathing shaky and nervous, Felix wondered how he was going to get out of this one.

Prayed that even if he didn’t, Kaden would. He hadn’t heard from Eleana in over an hour, and Mother he wished he could speak to her. Speak to his father, ask, beg, him for help.

At every turn, there was something new. Creatures his worst nightmares couldn’t have conjured. He blasted power to his right, his Illyrian magic burning through the flesh of the monsters the way his flames did. The way they came at him meant that he was always in the same spot, but forever turning to defend himself from a new threat. And those goddamned water droplets only served as a distraction.

Felix furiously burst his power out of him, using all he had every time he did. And he was succeeding, he killed tens every time.

But they just kept surging to him, wave after wave after wave. With an intent he had never seen in an animal. A twisted purpose he had only seen from the most brutal of killers. This wasn’t hunting for survival, they were killing for sport.

The well that was his power was being emptied ever so slightly every time he threw out a wave of power – whether it be the killing or fire.

Slash after slash, Felix put down every demon that came at him – every despicable creation. He no longer had doubt – these creatures had been made for this. To destroy.

His fire surged again, this time as a ring around him that pressed out then up then in, singeing whatever was in its way. The creatures practically glowed in its light, their skin turning rancid as he burned through them.

 _But those_ fucking _water droplets._

Felix, as trained as he was, as skilled as he was, looked up and away from his enemies.

And fell to his knees.

Not because he had been struck, but because it was not water cascading down onto him. It was blood.

Stabbed into the roof, held there by swords through the chest, the rope that was meant to be binding his wings stringing him up, was Kaden.

Did you know that when you die your eyes don’t close?

Kaden’s black eyes, lifeless as they were, stared through Felix like the blackness between the spirts on Starfall.

Felix, as trained as he was, skilled as he was, acclaimed as he was, intelligent as he was, as driven as he was, looked for too long.

Long claws stabbed through his back and out his sternum, piercing his heart. Felix choked on his own blood, his eyes never leaving Kaden’s, not even as his life drained from his body.


	26. Chapter 26

“Felix?”

The Illyrian warrior cracked his eyes open at the sound of his name, his eyelids aching as he did so. They felt like they weighed a tonne, but at least he didn’t feel any pain. Thank the Cauldron for fae healing, although it seemed his body had used all magic he’d had left to keep him alive. He tried to summon a flame to light the room, but not even a wisp appeared. The creatures, mercifully, were gone. Likely fleeing into the darkness as Feyre lit the tunnels to aid any survivors.

“F-Felix? Is that you?”

Felix’s eyes stung at the sound of that voice, that beautiful, melodic bastard’s voice.

“You’re okay,” he croaked.

Kaden stood in front of him, pale as snow and smeared with blood, holding a torch. “What happened here?”

Felix propped himself up and let his head hang back, breathing deeply. “Fucked if I know. I could’ve sworn I saw you nailed to the roof.” But the rope from Kaden’s wings that helped keep him up there was nowhere to be seen – Kaden must’ve unbound his wings and discarded it at some point. And his chest, the bastard was still only in shorts, was bloody but not mangled like he thought it had been.

Kaden furrowed his eyebrows, crouching beside Felix and inspecting him. “There’s Impeaths around here somewhere. Maybe that was it.” The torch Kaden was holding illuminated his face in the ghastliest way – making him look gaunt and wan. But at least he wasn’t injured, at least he wasn’t strung up on the roof.

Felix peeked at his friend. “That would mean your death is my greatest fear.”

Kaden’s lower lip wobbled slightly. “So we’re improving on that front, good to know.” Kaden laughed lightly, and Felix smirked at the sound. But as much as he wanted to lie here, muck around with Kaden and pretend everything was fine, they needed to get the fuck out of here.

He stood up, brushing off his leathers, hands lingering over his chest where he had been stabbed. That was a far closer call than he’d like to admit.

“Let’s get the fuck out of here,” he told Kaden, walking briskly in the direction of the exit.

They walked and jogged in silence, both exhausted, when Felix thought to ask Kaden about what had happened to him.

“I tried to fight, but then I just ran. The creatures didn’t seem overly concerned with me.” Kaden looked troubled at the thought.

“Maybe they just aren’t into blondes,” Felix joked.

Kaden snorted. “It seemed like they were choosing their targets, calculating exactly who to kill. That’s something we haven’t been prepared for. Previously, I just thought the people dying were in the wrong place at the wrong time. But what if that’s not the case? What would that mean for us?”

Felix stewed over his words. “I don’t know, Kaden, I don’t know.” It would mean Eleana being taken was no accident.

Every now and again as they ran, Felix would throw a hand out to stop them, listening for sounds in the dark and making sure the coast was clear before he let Kaden continue. If possible, there were even more bodies than when Felix had originally taken this route to come in. If this pattern continued all through the mountains, and he heavily suspected it did, just like that thousands of lives were lost.

The vision of Kaden lifeless and bleeding rang through his mind.

They were damned lucky their bodies weren’t lining the caverns too.

“How’s Eleana? She was scared shitless when I last spoke to her.” Felix asked as they ran, needing something to take his mind off the image of Kaden nailed to the roof, and of the memory of the pain in his chest.

“I cut her off. I told her I was fine and then shut her out.”

Felix tried to smack him in the back of the head as they ran, but Kaden dodged him. “Why the fuck would you do that? She’s going to be so worried about you.”

Kaden didn’t reply straight away, but Felix could tell he was mulling over his thoughts. Felix glanced his way, concerned to see the haunted look on his face.

“I…” Kaden trailed off. He shuddered, and slowed to a brisk walk as he spoke, his hands clasping and fiddling in front of him. “I was with a group when attacked by the creatures. I didn’t know what to do, so I called to her through our… bond, and she freaked. I couldn’t focus on her _and_ what was attacking me, so I cut her out – even though I knew it would hurt her.”

“Don’t worry, buddy, she’ll forgive you.” He reached out to ruffle his hair, but Kaden flinched away in pain before he could, bringing his hand to his head. “What is it?”

When Kaden brought away his hand, there was blood covering the tips of his fingers. “I was clawed,” he explained, a hazy look in his eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell me before? How much blood have you lost? Do you feel dizzy? Do you need to rest? Do we need to detour for water? It’s risky but worth it if you need it. You stupid bastard we’ve been running for nearly two hours while you have a head-wound.”

Kaden shook his head, and instead of answering took off at a sprint, leaving Felix behind in the dust. With an eye-roll, Felix followed his brother, matching his strides and quickly catching up.

Kaden went back to silence, and Felix was okay with that. They both needed to keep their attention on getting out of here, and Felix could feel himself becoming weaker the further he went. He kept a keen eye on Kaden though, far more concerned with the-idiot-with-the-head-injury.

Kaden kept glancing at him too.

They neared the entrance, large bonfires the only source of light in the night, and Felix breathed a sigh of relief when he started to feel the breeze from outdoors. He didn’t think he’d spent this long underground since his own Bloodrite, and he definitely wasn’t keen on experiencing it again. But they still had a few minutes to go – the bonfire only a speck in the blackness.

They ran the last leg as quickly as they could, bursting into the outdoors, gulping in the fresh air.

“Kaden!”

Of course, Eleana was waiting there with Rhys and Feyre, and ran to her mate the second she saw him. She jumped into his arms, Kaden catching her without a second thought. It made Felix smile ever so slightly, and gash to the head or no, Felix suspected there wasn’t anything that could keep Kaden from pulling Eleana to him as tightly as he could.

“No worries, Eleana. Anytime. I love going into mountains to fetch damsels in distress. Great to see you to.” He said it with love and humour in his voice, not at all surprised or mad that the first person she welcomed home first was her mate.

Rhys and Feyre were standing back, his aunt ashen and leaning her head on Rhys’ shoulder, her hand clasped in his.

“You’re okay, you’re okay, you’re okay,” Eleana kept muttering to Kaden. Her forehead was resting on his, but her eyes were open and staring at him. “Please,” she whispered, “don’t cut me out like that again. Or give me some warning at least.”

Kaden swallowed hard and nodded, making her pull back ever so slightly. She then looked over his shoulder at the entrance. It was so dark that if you were trapped inside without light it would be like being stuck in the fathomless parts of the ocean. You wouldn’t know up from down or side to side – only that without the mercy of light you very well may be doomed.

“Kaden?” she said as she looked behind him.

Kaden tensed and braced himself at her tone, making Felix tilt his head in confusion.

“Where’s Felix?”

Felix snorted, and crossed his arms over his chest. “Are you serious, Laya? C’mon.”

She didn’t turn at his words, but instead pushed away from Kaden completely, his arms dropping to his side hopelessly. She stepped around him, taking slow and hesitant steps towards the entrance. “Kaden, where is he?”

Felix screwed up his face, what was wrong with her?

He looked to Feyre and Rhys for answer, only to see that Rhys had fallen to his knees, and Feyre was gasping while she covered her face. Felix, astonished at what he was seeing and wondering what was wrong, looked to his trusted brother for answers.

Kaden was looking directly at him, his eyes hazy from emotion, as they had been since Kaden had found him.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

Felix read the devastation written on his friend’s face, starting to understand what was happening.

Kaden’s eyes were not waxy from emotion or exhaustion. It was from his magic.

The magic that allowed him to see the Other Side. To see the dead.

Oh.

Felix started furiously pulling at his leathers, ripping them off so he could see the puncture marks on his chest.

Or not. There was nothing but smooth skin.

Felix looked on in horror as the reality of his death hit not only him, but Eleana as well.

She was breathing heavily, her chest heaving as she quaked. Then she stormed to her father, grabbing him by his shirt and pulling him upright.

“ _What are you doing?”_ she screamed. “You have to – have to go get the other High Lords. I’ll go get the body, if we’re quick we can still save him.” Her tearless sobs were starting to strangle her, and no matter how many times Felix called her name she could not hear him.

Feyre was trying to console her daughter; Rhys was muttering about how he could possibly tell his brother his son was dead.

Kaden was a statue – he looked as though he was carved from tarnished gold to commemorate the ruthless barbarity that had occurred over the last week, representing all the soldiers who had been devoured by something they never could have predicted.

“You cannot go back in there, Eleana. It’s too late. It’s too late. He’s gone, okay? He’s gone.” Feyre tried to hug Eleana but she pushed her mother away with an other-worldly screech.

Felix observed in distress as his cousin unravelled while there was nothing he could do about it.

She started kicking the ground, her darkness and magic swelling around her like an infected laceration. She was shrieking, a noise nearly as inhuman as the ones the creatures made. Like a ship wreck at the bottom of a whirlpool, Eleana was surrounded by a current of her dark magic in its most toxic form, making everyone but Rhys back away.

Even Felix took a step back, even though he knew, realistically, that nothing could hurt him now.

Rhys was blocking her magic with his, trying to get to his screaming, distressed daughter. In the moments where his magic hit hers, it was like a window opened for Felix to see her.

She was no longer entirely fae, her other form, usually reserved for High Lords once they’d gained their titles, was staring to overcome her in her despair. Her skin had turned to blue so deep it was nearly black, and her fingers had shifted into claws. Her teeth were like razors protruding from her mouth, long and promising death.

Rhys got close enough to wrap his arms around her, and Feyre shoved some sort of shield around the two, blocking any sound from reaching their ears.

Felix did not know what was more terrifying – the noise Eleana had been making, or the vision of her thrashing and screaming without actually being able to hear her.

He could see Rhys yelling something at her but was unable to tell what, and then, just like that, the pair were gone – Rhys winnowing them Cauldron knows where.

Feyre stayed behind, and approached Kaden the way someone might approach a rapid animal.

“You should go be with her; she’ll need you,” he said monotonously to Feyre, turning his back to her.

Felix recognized the look on Kaden’s face, he had seen it before. It was like a thin layer of stone covering something twisted and in agony. That was the look on his face when Felix had stopped him that very first time, over a year ago.

He had seen Kaden training, had felt the power the boy before him possessed. He had been scouting for a new member of the Elite for months, and as of yet hadn’t found anyone. Then he saw Kaden training with one of the lowest tier squadrons, obliterating them all in combat. It was a complete accident, and he wasn’t even supposed to be there that day.

He had watched Kaden for hours, knowing there was something quite special about the male in front of him.

Kaden had been broken at the time, and you could see it in the brutal way he trained and fought. He was good, undoubtedly so, but he needed refinement. Every tactic he used was a defensive one, and Felix identified him as an abuse victim within a week or so. Felix never pushed the topic, Kaden would talk to him when he was ready, and he was careful to tread lightly around him and not be as vicious in his training as he might otherwise have been. Everyone needed training forthcoming to them, and so Felix took a different approach to Kaden.

Which led to him finding the best friend and brother he’d ever had.

Who then, against all odds, was the mate of his other best friend – Eleana.

The first time Felix ever saw Kaden he was spattered in mud, his face lifeless, his body stiff and yet uncontrolled, the rain biting at him.

The last time Felix would ever see Kaden he was spattered in blood, his face void, his body limp and yet controlled, the wind biting at him.

“She needs you too.” Feyre reached out a hand and then let it fall, unsure of how to comfort him.

Kaden shook his head. “There’s something I have to do first, I’ll return soon High Lady Feyre, I promise.”

Feyre looked hesitant, but nodded – winnowing away with one last worried glance.

Felix waited for Kaden to speak – for him to explain.

It took a few minutes, but eventually Kaden’s strained voice said, “I’m so sorry.”

Kaden was biting his lip to keep his sobs at bay, but Felix just smiled sadly at him. “I don’t blame you, brother.”

“You should,” he spat. “You never would have been there if it wasn’t for me.”

Felix walked until he was standing three feet in front of him. “There are a million things we can blame for this, the least of all you or Eleana. You make sure she knows that, okay? She’ll destroy herself over this otherwise. As for you, you have to go to her, but there’s a few things I need to tell you first.”

_____

Kaden frowned, making a little indentation between his eyebrows appear.

“Firstly,” Felix started, “you could have given me some warning, asshole.”

Kaden bit back a pained laugh, his head pounding. “Why would I do that when I know how much you love drama?” he played along.

“I can’t fault you there. Look, I’ve hidden Eleana’s birthday present under my bed. It’s a book I made for her. Can you please give it to her for me?”

Kaden nodded, unable to do anything else.

“Also.” Felix cut himself off, raising his eyes to the night sky, his teeth grinding together.

Kaden knew from past experiences that the dead could cry, and his chest felt an excruciating pain at watching Felix try and hold himself together.  

Felix cleared his throat. “If you could – can you please talk to Quathryn for me. Just, I don’t know, tell her I love her? That I wouldn’t have left her if I had a choice?”

“Of – of course,” Kaden sputtered.

“And Thea she’s, she’s not even going to know me. Can you make sure she does? Just a little bit? Tell her stories – the more pleasant ones when she’s young, and then when she’s older tell her everything else. I don’t want to be a stranger to her. Tell my family I love them, my mother and father will be heartbroken, but they’ll move on one day.”

Kaden shook his head, raving. “Felix, you can’t think like that-”

“Tell my aunts and uncles how much I appreciated them, but tell Az…” A single tear escaped its way down Felix’s cheek. “Tell Az that one of my greatest regrets in life was not forgiving him, not talking to him when I should have. You have to make sure he knows how much I love him, how much I admire him and how grateful I am that he always cared for me. He was someone’s love that I never questioned, and I was an ass to him.”

“Felix,” Kaden gulped. “I don’t think I can do this without you. I don’t know how to function… It’s always been you and me. I would be nothing without you.”

“You’ll be plenty without me, you already were before we met.”

“I wasn’t-”

“You are the funniest person I’ve ever met, and the strongest. You’ve endured so much, and you’ve never been resigned or bitter about it. What’s happened to me is done, and I’ll forever know that because of a sacrifice I made you’re still here. That’s – that’s the best thing I’ve ever done. I’m really proud of you.”

“Felix, stop.” Kaden couldn’t take his words. He didn’t deserve this praise, and he didn’t want to spend his last moments with Felix talking about himself.

“But I need you to know. You – you talk about what I did for you but I’ve never told you how much you’ve done for me. I didn’t really have anyone before you. Sure, Eleana was there but she’s so young, and so different from me. You’ve given me so much,”

“Felix, I can’t handle this.”

“And I love you so much. And I wish I could’ve been around longer for you. To see you live with me, and grow with Laya. To see you get married and have little powerful babies that will likely take over the world.”

Kaden stifled another laugh, his own tears starting to fall. “You’re ridiculous.”

“There are things you don’t know about her,” Felix’s voice was raspy from holding back his emotion, but his face said everything his tears didn’t.

Kaden could easily tell how devastated Felix was that he wasn’t going to be there for all the big things. And that emotion was mirrored in Kaden.

“And I’m so excited for you to learn all those things, I can tell you there isn’t a single thing you won’t be happy about. And I… I…” Felix coughed to try and hide his sob, and Kaden did the same – a weirdly comforting motion for the brothers.

Felix’s face pinched, and he inhaled sharply and loudly as he tried to breathe. “Kaden, I’m so scared,” he gasped. “I don’t want this to be it. I haven’t done enough, I haven’t – I don’t want to leave yet. I don’t want my sisters growing up without me. I don’t want to stay in the dark. I don’t – I can’t-”

Kaden stared in utter misery and distress as Felix broke down in front of him, his hands pressing against his heaving chest as if he could reverse the wound that killed him.

“When you leave will that be it? Will I just disappear?”

Felix waited for an answer.

“…I don’t know…” Kaden said.

Felix looked at the ground, a tear sliding down his nose and dripping to the ground, never quite making it. Before it had the chance to touch the dirt and stones, it disappeared.

Much like Felix’s feet.

“Oh, gods, it’s happening. I don’t want to go,” he shuddered.

“Your tie here isn’t strong enough. There’s – there’s nothing I can do. I – Felix, I don’t want you to go. Please, try and stay with me.”

Felix looked him in the eyes, a strength there Kaden could never achieve. “Let’s not spend this time begging. There’s so much I have to say, so much I want to hear.”

Through Felix, Kaden could see the large expanse spread before him. He was starting to become sheer; their time together was coming to an end.

They sat, and Felix spent the rest of his time telling Kaden all the stories he had kept to himself over the years – comical stories like how he once dropped Eleana, sad stories like the one and only time Felix had been in love. Stories that only Felix knew, but were intrinsic to who he was. Then he listened to Kaden as the male confessed everything to his brother, including his thoughts on what might be between him and Eleana. Felix told Kaden how Quathryn and Theodosia needed a big brother, and Kaden swore he would do his best.

They both quietly wept the whole time, their tears increasing more as Felix faded into his surroundings. Felix, who was so clearly scared by the thought of oblivion, but still had the spirit to smile at Kaden.

Kaden would be eternally grateful that he got these last few hours with his brother, and as the sun rose, and Felix faded away, Kaden was left with one last message.

“Farewell, brother, may it be many, many years before I see you again.”


	27. Chapter 27

She ran her hand down his hair, enjoying the feather like feel of his brunette locks. Her claws sometimes caught in it, blood making the brown strands stick together. His glassy, lifeless hazel eyes were stuck in the direction of the ceiling, and she was tempted to press the pads of her digits against them to make them look at her, but she didn’t want to accidently pierce them.

He was pretty – not as handsome as the gold one, and that had been his ultimate downfall. Not just that, but the heir just loved his so much.

His death would ruin her.

Which is what she’d wanted – what she needed.

_____

 

Eleana felt like she was sinking.

Her heart rate had slowed and been overly rapid at unpredictable intervals since it had happened. Since she’d realised her cousin, brother, best friend, was never coming home. She forever felt like she was sinking. Her arms were swords being slid into their sheaths. Her legs were oaks being taken down from the swing of an axe. Her chest was a corset being bound a tight as it could go. Time has slowed from the beat of a hummingbird’s wings to the hesitant last gasp before someone drowned.

She was not ready to face the consequences of Felix not being here. She didn’t know how she would put her smashed, porcelain-self back together if he wasn’t there to pick up the pieces. As he had done so many times before.

And as she looked into the exhausted eyes of her mate, she couldn’t bring herself to say anything other than, “Where have you been?”

He swallowed hard, his hands twitching like he wanted to rest them on her, but didn’t have the courage to.

“It’s been nearly two days,” she continued.

He didn’t answer, so she turned away from him.

He had come to find her, he’d said. Used his magic to bring him to this cabin sequestered so very far away from everything else.

When he’d knocked on the door, Eleana was unsuccessfully trying to sleep. Her mother, wary it was something sinister, opened the door ready to attack, only to pull up short when she saw Kaden.

To give them privacy, she went to Velaris to help the High Lord with Cassian and Nesta, but not before laying wards strong enough to keep out an army.

Her hands were braced on a stained table, her face as limp as her unwashed hair. She observed him, since he wouldn’t speak. He had bathed at some point, his skin clean but wan. He was in a loose shirt and pants, his feet bare. And, trailing down his arms like vines encasing him, were Illyrian tattoos. On his arms, the swirls, flowers and ancient words were so extensive his fingers were even decorated. As severe as it was, it was not harsh – much like the male bearing them. She wondered what tattoos covered his chest.

She took a hesitant step toward him, his face blank. He hadn’t let her in his mind yet, had their bond blocked so strongly that she would have to invade him to see what he was thinking. But… she didn’t want to. She didn’t want to put her grief into him, or to take his away. She wanted them to share, but she didn’t know how she could possibly handle feeling twice as bad as she did now.

“Did you know,” she said to fill the silence, “that my mother can no longer paint her father? As much as she loves him, she can no longer remember his face. He is a blur, with no finer details or anything to distinguish him. She knows his eyes, but that’s all.”

She took another step towards her mate.

“I’m scared that one day I’ll wake up and I won’t be able to picture his face anymore. Or that I won’t remember the exact way his voice sounds.” One more step, and she was close enough to him that he could reach her if he wanted.

He lifted his arm, and trailed his thumb down her cheek, resting his hand on her neck. “Do you blame me for what happened?” he whispered.

She rested her hand over his. “No.”

He moved his hand to her waist, pulling her to him. He wrapped his arms around her, and she leant into his chest and breathed deeply – for the first time in days.

“Good. Because I’ll need your help to eviscerate those creatures and whatever is controlling them.”

_____

 

“He’s safe, but I wouldn’t say he’s okay. But who of us is?”

Azriel hung onto every word, grateful that Kaden had made an appearance somewhere. Would he have preferred the young one come to him first? Yes. But at least now someone has seen him.

“And Eleana?” he asked Feyre.

“She’s not coping – at all. She hasn’t slept yet, changes between forms unwillingly and without notice, and is constantly either distressed or just… empty.”

 “She’ll feel better once we’ve moved into action. The High Lords will be here in four days.” Four days for their family to be in control enough to tell the other courts what had happened, and to devise a plan to eradicate these creatures. Azriel, with all his wisdom and knowledge, didn’t know where to start.

“And the recon teams?”

“Enough survived to get us a specimen, but there are a lot of families who will be in mourning.”

Feyre nodded at his words.

They’re conversation ended with Feyre squeezing his shoulder, leaving the library of the House of Wind to join her sisters in the atrium.

Azriel wanted to help his brother and Nesta, desperately, but he didn’t know how. He himself could barely comprehend what had happened. It had yet to hit him. He had yet to have the breakdown that was expected of him, he hadn’t yet cried, he hadn’t yet stopped being surprised when he walked into a room without Felix in it.

Maybe if he’d had a body his grief would surface quicker, but right now he just felt nothing. Like he was a void. Resigned. Every few minutes, his chest would tighten and his breath would quicken and he’d think, okay _now. Now I’m going to cry, get mad, scream_. And then the feeling would pass, and he’d blink away the tears that never fell and would continue trying to find justice for his nephew.

He’d dealt with the fallout of the Bloodrite for Rhys. The Illyrians lords were horrified and furious, and had all fortified their camps and doubled patrols to be on alert for any creatures. They were not aware of Felix’s death – no one but the Inner Circle was, and it would remain that way for the time being. It would cause an uncontrollable panic not only among the Illyrians, but also the fae.

Because Felix was _dead_. Felix Warbringer, set to be the most powerful Illyrian ever born, had been killed by these creatures.

Azriel had been with Cassian when Rhys told their brother of the news. And it was devastating. Cass tried to go into the mountains to try and save his son, had begged his brothers to let him go – he had to go to his boy. _He had to_. He would be scared if he was alone in the dark. And he would be fine if his father was there with him. Cassian could find a way to bring him back.

He’d thought them tooth and nail until he had collapsed, no strength left in his body.

And then there was Nesta.

Azriel could count how many times he had seen her cry on one hand, and now she had cried more than the amount of leaves in a forest. The most pained, choked wails he had ever heard. She had beaten her fists bloody against the ground in anger and agony, all her fingers breaking at the impacts; the only thing that stopped her from imploding and destroying herself was the sound of Theodosia’s cries as the babe awoke. Nesta wiped the blood off her hands, let Elain heal her broken bones, then calmly walked to the nursey, picking up Thea and cradling her daughter to her chest. Her face had gone gaunt, and the colour had leaked out of her.

Maybe the reason Azriel struggled to show emotion was because even though he loved Felix with all his heart, the boy had come to detest him. Did Azriel have any right to grieve?

Azriel wished he could stay in the library and hide away, but he couldn’t. His family was relying on him.

He dragged his feet as he walked to join the rest of them, Mor summoning them all for lunch. None of them felt well enough to eat, but his wife would force feed them if she had to.

Azriel also needed to start preparing for the onslaught he would get at the High Lord’s meeting, namely, _what do you mean you knew about this already? What do you mean you stopped looking for the creatures?_ _How could you let this happen?_

Azriel had no choice but to now accept everything his niece and nephews had presented to him about the creatures as fact – which meant they had also been working in other courts. Cauldron, Eleana had been taken by this ‘Colloden’ in another court.

Mor had brought sandwiches and tea on a cart, handing them out on china plates to the family. Quathryn, uninterested in the gourmet treats, had settled for sprinkles on buttered bread. The girl had no idea what was going on – only that everyone was far sadder than usual.

He let her be, not wanting the dark, ghastly shadows that had been haunting him since the death of his nephew to bother her.

He took a seat next to his brothers on a bench overlooking the window facing Velaris, matching their silence. Everyone was here, except Kaden and Eleana. He hoped they were sleeping, he doubted his boy would be able to without his mate there.

The thought of Kaden tore at him – the boy he had come to think of as a son. A boy who had finally gotten a brother that loved and cared for him the way a brother should, only for some sick, twisted turn of events to take him away.

“You’ve heard from Kaden?” Azriel overheard Nesta say in a whisper, the woman squeezing her fingers into Feyre’s arm.

“He’s with Eleana – he showed up out of nowhere,” Feyre replied, covering Nesta’s hand with her own.

“And Felix?” Nesta’s eyes were so wide with hope.

Feyre shook her head. “No, Nesta.”

Her face fell, fresh tears starting to line her cheeks.

Nesta had an insane hope when Kaden didn’t come back, that maybe it was because he had gone back into the mountain to revive Felix, the way he had Thea. Feyre, as soothingly as she could, said she didn’t know much about Kaden’s peculiar magic, but she doubted the circumstances were similar enough for it to happen again. Theodosia had been a stillborn – Felix was…

Mauled.

But that didn’t stop Nesta from hoping.

Cassian didn’t share her belief.

Azriel couldn’t bear to look at Nesta any longer, and turned his head away. Cassian also stayed quiet during the exchange.

He prayed for the moment when Elain and Lucien returned from the Spring Court, from explaining what had happened to Felix to Glaslane – the pair had been close for a time. Elain was still Nesta’s most effective form of comfort.

Azriel’s attention was caught by a tentative knock at the door – an overly loud noise in a room full of very quiet people.

“Who is it?” Rhys called, standing and positioning himself in front of Cassian.

“It’s me, Papa, and Kaden.” Eleana opened the door and peaked her head in.

Azriel flinched at the dark crescents under her eyes and the paleness to her face.

“We didn’t want to disturb anyone.”

Rhys waved her in, greeting her with a tight hug. Behind her, Kaden shuffled in, his head hanging low and his shoulders slumped.

Azriel got to his feet and moved towards him, stopping when he saw the Illyrian tattoos covering his arms.

Kaden noticed his gaze, and self-consciously rubbed at his skin.

Azriel shook his head, not caring that his boy got the tattoos he’d deserved, but he was saddened that the thought of Kaden going through such an emotionally tumultuous experience alone.

“Kaden? Hey, buddy. Want some food?” Azriel approached him with one hand one, gently patting him on the head.

“No, thank you,” he murmured. “I – I have something to tell you.”

“Do you want to go somewhere?”

“No, I – It’s for everyone.”

Azriel led him further inside, letting Kaden choose when to speak, the young man’s black eyes sweeping the room. His stare stopped on Quathryn, fingers stained like a rainbow from her sprinkles, mouth full of bread and books and toys scattered on the floor around her.

His face crumpled, and he strode towards the tot, leaning down and picking her up so he could hug her.

“Kaden!” she cheered, wrapping her tiny arms around his neck.

“Hi, Little One,” he sniffled.

Everyone in the room had stopped what they were doing to look at Kaden and Quathryn.

Quathryn leaned in and whispered something in his ear. It was so faint that Azriel could barely make out what she was saying, but he got the gist of it.

_Do you know where Lis is?_

Kaden said no, and hugged her closer to him. Quathryn seemed content to just have cuddle time, laying her head on him and not asking any further for her brother.

Cassian had tried to tell her, but Quathryn was too young to truly understand what he was saying – the _permanence_ of Felix being gone.

“What was it you had to tell us?” Azriel prompted him.

Kaden kept a hold of Quathryn while he spoke, swaying her slightly. “I talked to Felix, and there are some things he wanted me to relay to you.”

Everyone flung out of their chairs, surrounding him with pressing questions.

_What do you mean you talked to him?_

_I thought you weren’t there when he died?_

_What did he say?_

_How can that be?_

Azriel’s family wasn’t as versed in Kaden’s magic as he was, with the exception of Eleana, and he could scarcely remember if he’d ever mentioned Kaden’s ability to connect with the dead.

Kaden recoiled away from there badgering questions, but before Azriel could ask them to give him some space, Eleana butted in, fury scorched in her expression.

“You spoke to Felix? For how long?” Her tone was so scathing the others quietened.

“Until dawn, the day after,” Kaden said nervously.

Eleana gritted her teeth, her voice a low growl when she said under her breath, “You mean to tell me you had _hours_ with him, and didn’t think to summon anyone? To let anyone else say goodbye?”

“ _Eleana_.” Kaden looked stricken.

“You could have told me to come and I would’ve been there in a second-”

“How-”

“ _You damn well know_. You could’ve brought the wall down between the bond anytime you fucking pleased. You could have let me say goodbye to him. You could have let anyone here have their final peace with him. He was my best friend. Through you I could’ve seen him. I could have told him I loved him. You – you – I can’t believe you didn’t tell me to come.”

Azriel believed Kaden would’ve gone to her if he hadn’t been holding Quathryn, who was now alert and looking at Eleana with worry.

“You were in such a bad state-”

She snarled at him, a noise to low and feral that Cassian came forward and grabbed Quathryn from Kaden, scared Eleana might lose control and accidently hurt her. Which was valid, as while Eleana growled her skin changed its form and colour, her teeth elongating and her and her pupils widening.

It never took long for Eleana’s mood to change, and with her exhaustion and despair combined her mood was rapidly changing. Azriel stood back, not wanting to interfere with the mates.

“What did he have to say then, huh? That only you were privy to,” she spat.

“He said he loves you, and that no one here, especially you, is to blame for this.” Kaden turned to Cassian and Nesta. “You told me to tell you that he will forever be indebted to you for raising him with such strength, and for teaching him to be kind. His family is the most important thing to him, and his biggest regret is not being able to see Quathryn grow and become the sassiest little thing Velaris has seen since the High Lord’s last hissy fit.” Kaden turned to Rhys, a sheepish look on his face. “I’m quoting.”

Rhys bowed his head.

“He hopes you’ll tell stories of him to Thea,” Kaden continued. “He doesn’t want to be a stranger to her, even if she’ll never remember any of the time she had with him.”

Cassian, holding Quathryn in one arm, reached the other out to Nesta, circling it around her and Thea. “How did he tell you these things?” His voice deathly quiet.

“I can confer with the dead. It’s how I helped Thea, kind of. That was different, but this I have been able to do my whole life.”

“Is he still there?” Nesta asked, the hope that had vanished reigniting in her eyes.

“No,” Kaden didn’t leave her hanging, not wanted to be a source of false hope.

“Are you sure?” she pleaded with him.

“Yes. I’m sorry. He’s moved on to a place where even I can’t find him.”

Nesta’s breath shook, and she motioned for Kaden to continue.

He told them all the things Felix had shared with him – only withholding the information meant for specific people. He said the funny stories and the melancholy ones. At one point, he looked at the High Lord and Lady apologetically and said, “When Eleana was four months old, Felix dropped her. He said it explains an awful lot.”

Rhys and Feyre had burst out laughing, which immediately turned to tears. At least Quathryn’s twinkling giggles joined in momentarily.

Eleana remained in half in her other form the entire conversation, not looking at Kaden, even when he tried to speak with her.

When he had finished, Nesta was sobbing again, and Cassian took her away to try and calm her, bringing the children with him. Quathryn waved to Kaden as she left, and it was the only thing that could have possibly made Kaden genuinely smile that day.

Mor approached Kaden and took him into her arms, tears of her own falling.

Azriel watched Eleana turn to steal as she watched Mor and Kaden and Feyre and Rhys. Her fists were clenched so tightly her knuckles were stark against her skin, and her face had flushed red in anger. The stories from Kaden had not thawed the sudden anger for her mate, and Azriel wished he was still in a position where she’d want his help.

But maybe it was on him to try harder – to show her more that he was sorry.

He proceeded cautiously towards her, but he wasn’t the only one to have the idea. Kaden separated from Mor, extending his tattooed hands towards Eleana.

Mid-step, Kaden faltered like he’d hit an invisible barrier. Trying again, he hit another wall, and put his hands up, resting them flat against an invisible shield. He banged his hand on the wall, trying to dismantle it.

“Eleana?”

The others watched as he called her name, unable to breach her shield.

“You once used my eyes to save someone we love; I would’ve expected you to grant me the same curtesy to say goodbye to a person I love. You should have called me. You should have let me hear these stories from him.”

Eleana stalked to the window, her wings flaring and preparing for flight.

Rhys and Feyre became immediately alarmed, and stood in her way to stop her.

“Laya, Butterfly where are you going?” Feyre asked, concern lacing her every word.

“Away from here. I can’t think; I can’t breathe – not here.”

Rhys blocked the window, keeping her inside. Azriel walked to his side, knowing it was a bad idea to try and trap her inside but also knowing if she left she would be a loose bomb ready to explode.

“Come with me, let’s go to the townhouse, or back to the cabin if you want.”

“Get out of my way.”

“Laya.”

She growled, a noise far more animal than fae, and disappeared.

Azriel baulked at where she had just been standing, shock palpitating from everyone in the room.

“Where did she go?” Kaden questioned.

“She… she winnowed away.” Feyre’s mouth was agape, her eyes wide.

“She does it all the time – no reason to be surprised. I’ll find her, it won’t take me long.”

“No, Kaden, the wards on the House of Wind mean no winnowing. It is physically, and magically impossible for her to do so.”

“She must have removed the wards.”

“She didn’t, I can still feel them here – intact,” Mor said.

Rhys turned to Feyre and sighed. “Looks like she’s more powerful than we thought. That’s okay, though, I always knew our little Butterfly would be something special. We better go find her.”

Kaden opened his mouth as if to offer his services, but Rhys shut him down with a glare. “You stay here. You’re not what she needs right now.”

The pair left, leaving Azriel with his wife and the closest thing to a son he’d ever had.

“Let’s go home,” Mor exhaled. “Cassian and Nesta need space, and we all need to sleep. The night will bring an unprecedented darkness tonight.”

____

 

Night had fallen; Kaden had yet to sleep, and Eleana had yet to be found. Mor and Az joined the search for her, only going once Kaden convinced them too. They didn’t want to leave him, but he assured them that he would be okay. He thought he might sleep, but when he tried he felt too light without the weight of Eleana with him.

He had a notebook in front of him, and was trying to write out every word Felix had said to him. His hands were shaking, making his writing messy but decipherable. He would one day give this book to Quathryn and Thea – Felix would be no stranger to them.

As he was writing, there was a quiet knock at the door. Curious as to who it could be, Kaden heaved himself from his seat, padding to the foyer to meet whoever had come over. He opened the door, and was surprised to see Cassian with his two daughters, holding Quathryn by the hand and Thea in his arm.

“Hello, Kaden. Can you get Azriel for me?”

Kaden’s nose wrinkled; Cassian smelt like sweat and grot – like death.  

“He’s not here right now. They’re still looking for Eleana.” Which Kaden was bitter he wasn’t invited to. He could find her easily – it was the only thing his body seemed to want to do. Kaden had tried to reopen the bond with her, but now she was the one keeping him away – which he justly deserved. Eleana was right, he hadn’t thought to summon her so she could say goodbye to her cousin, and now he felt retched about it.

Cassian’s chest fell. “Okay.” He nodded, taking a step back.

That’s when Kaden noted the small bag he was wearing on his back. “Did you need something? I might be able to help.”

“I just needed Az for the night, it’s okay though,” Cassian said slowly.

The older male took a step back, Quathryn swaying with the movement, her little body drained of energy.

“Why don’t you come inside?” Kaden insisted. “I’ll make us some tea, and Quathryn can sleep in my bed if she’d like. And I’m sure I could also scrounge up a cot somewhere.”

Cassian looked thoughtful, then nodded his head.

Kaden let them in, picking Quathryn up and taking her to his room. She was asleep before they were even up the stairs, and he tucked her in nice and tight, wanting her to get as much rest as she could.

He couldn’t find a crib, so instead he emptied his biggest basket and made it into a makeshift bassinet. He went back for Thea, and Cassian reluctantly handed her over, the infant also asleep.  He made them tea, and it lived untouched from Cassian on the table in front of him.

Kaden didn’t know what to say to him – how could you possibly comfort a father grieving for his dead son?

Kaden sat across from him, averting his gaze from the haggard looking General. Cassian also stayed quiet, an awkward tension rising in the room from lack of words. Kaden wished he had the charm and tact of Eleana or Felix, then maybe he would know what to do. There was a many great thing he wished he had said to Felix before he’d said goodbye, and one of those things should’ve been a demand for Felix to tell him how he was supposed to survive in this damned world without him.

“Do you have any idea when Mor and Az will be back?” Cassian broke through the silence, his voice rough.

“No. Can I help at all?”

His shoulders were hunched, and his feet tapped against the chair leg. “I just-” Cassian cut himself off, shuddering a sigh. “I love my children more than I love anything, but Nesta and I… right now we’re not the best people to be around, and I’m starting to worry that it’ll effect the girls. One night. I swear, I was only going to ask him to care for them for a single night, so Nesta could sleep.”  Cassian blinked furiously, his teeth biting at his lip in an effort to hide his tears from Kaden.

Kaden wasn’t the only one feeling retched. It was easy to tell how guilty Cassian felt about giving his daughters to Azriel, even of it was for the best. And Kaden could see that it was. When he had seen Cassian and Nesta earlier, he had been genuinely afraid. Her clothes were frayed at the sleeves from where she had ripped them in her anxiety, and Cassian looked like he could barely stand upright.  But however they looked, Kaden could feel how the heartbreak and anger that beheld them had the power to strike through anyone. If turned in the wrong direction, as emotions often were in these times, it could be dangerous. It made him want to grab Eleana and run.

His mind and body yearned for the comfort of his Eleana. To know that she was safe with him – the only place he trusted her to be. Without her here, or knowing where she was, Kaden had an itch in his fingers that made his want to rip at flesh and destroy lives – especially the ones that had caused her so much pain.

“There is no weakness in asking for help, General Cassian.”

Kaden believed, wholeheartedly, that if they all knew how to better ask for help, then none of this would have happened.

____

 

It took Eleana a while to find the familiar entrance, even though the image was burned in her retinas.

When she had first been here, her stomach had been twisting with nerves, making her more nauseous than she had ever been. She’d been digging into the earth with her feels –  the tracks still there – and the only reason she hadn’t stormed inside the mountains themselves was because her parents were there and had forbade her to do so. Their arguments had been logical, so she had listened.

Eleana had come to realise that the moment Kaden had shut her out was the moment he first saw Felix. Before that, he had welcomed her in his mind, telling her he loved her, how much he wanted to see her again. When he’d slammed up the titanium wall between them her sternum felt like it was being crushed.

Then, he walked out unscathed, and she’d run to him. What else would she have done?

She’s wanted to thank her cousin profusely for saving her mate, but when she’d turned to speak to him he was not there.

Eleana stood directly in front of the entrance, not daring to look into its black abyss. Instead, she looked upwards at the stars, her hair scratching her face as the wind lightly blew.

The distant smell of pine blew through the air – jarringly pleasant in this place of nightmares.

With no small amount of courage, Eleana set her eyes on the darkness ahead, her throat tight and dry as she spoke.

“Felix?” she murmured. “Are you still here?”

She knew Kaden had said he was gone, but he had yet to master his magic – much like her. Even if the chance to see her cousin again was minimal, she would take it.

“I don’t expect to see you, I just… I miss you. If you’re here, and Cauldron I wish you are, just give me a sign. Anything.”

Her eyes started to string, and her darkness threatened to lash out again. She could feel it inside her like it was simmering just under her skin, pushing and prodding upwards trying to be free.

She lowered herself to the ground, fisting the dirt that surrounded her. Pulverizing it between her fingers, she lashed out and threw a handful of it at the cave entrance with a scream. She bit her lip to restrain herself, so hard that it drew blood, the red dripping down her chin.

She rubbed at her face, not caring if she smudged herself with dirt, trying to clear her scattered mind.

There were constant knocks in her direction, her parents and Kaden, but she didn’t feel like letting anyone in. In all her times of anguish her only true coping method had been Felix. She didn’t have that now, and all she craved was to hear his voice again –  to laugh with him – to get the goodbye that Kaden had.

Was she really mad that her mate hadn’t summoned her, or was she just mad at the world for doing such a horrid thing to such a pure person? She did not know, and she did not mind her fury. Her fury was fuelling her magic, and her magic would help end all this. Once the High Lords and Ladies had met and they formed a plan on how to eradicate these creatures, Eleana would be more than valuable.

That’s if they could ever find the creatures.

There were just so many unanswered questions. Who was doing this? These creatures didn’t just appear out of nowhere, and they acted with such intention that it was impossible to believe that they were anything but puppets to some string master. All attacks had occurred within the past few years, with more and more happening in recent times. What was truly petrifying was that if not for the Impeath attack on Felix so long ago, they never would have known about the creatures at all. Yes, Eleana may have been taken by the Colloden, but she never would have made the connections about the bed time tales.

“Felix,” she whispered to nothing, knowing he was gone, “I love you, and I would sell my soul to see you again. To have a chance to say goodbye.” Her voice broke on the last word, and the tears she had never been able to hold back swelled again. She was lost; she didn’t know where to turn. Her heart ached when she thought of Kaden, and she loved him so damn much but that didn’t mean she wasn’t furious with him for not thinking of her the way she would have him – for not giving her a goodbye.

“You told me to stay safe, Felix, but you were my unfaltering anchor, no matter how rough the seas were. I’ve never had a day where I couldn’t turn to you, since we were children you were my most trusted, most loyal friend.”

Deep in the pit of her stomach, she felt anxiety curling at the thought of forgetting a single detail about her brother. It gripped her like a choke hold, and her breath started faltering and her mind started wondering, her nerves sparking negatives thoughts that further stoked the fire that was her mind.

Eleana recognized to herself that sitting here at night was likely a terrible idea, but she made no effort to move. Rather, she lied down, resting her head on her hands facing the entrance.

Her eyelids drooped, and there was some sick joke in the fact that the only place she could finally sleep was when she was as close to Felix’s body as she could get.

She let her eyes close, only a small part nagging at her that this was dangerous. But a larger part, a part forged by fatigue and woe, told her to stay, because how could something worse possibly happen?

As Eleana drifted, the path into the entrance was eerily quiet. You could not hear the creatures that lurked in the mountains caverns, nor any animals that would usually take refuge in this area. There were no Illyrians, all guarding their homes and trusting the wards of the High Lord and Lady to lock the beasts inside.

Her tears subsided, hiding away for the time being, preserving themselves until her next panic attack or nightmare. She let her body sink into the ground, succumbing to the day, keeping her mind closed and quiet. The air smelt sweet from distant trees and flowers, and she detested how peaceful it was. The wind was a welcoming caress on her skin, and now maybe she would sleep.

And then the snap of a twig breaking, and Eleana’s eyes flew open as she skidded to her feet, watching as a dark figure glided out from the mountain. It was black and languid, claws to rival that of an Impeath. It had a gleaming smile on its face, its teeth like daggers piercing through its mouth. But the most frightening, the thing that made Eleana’s heart quicken and back sweat, was its bright, molten golden eyes.

“Eleana of the Night Court, I’ve been waiting for you. And I can give you what you want.”


	28. Chapter 28

Kaden awoke to Azriel gently nudging his shoulder, his eyes barely having to adjust in the still-dark room. For a moment, he felt confusion – about where he was, what he was doing – but he could never escape reality long. Kaden stood from his place on the floor, his gaze shooting between Thea and Quathryn who were both still asleep. He nodded to himself – it was good that they slept and dreamt if it meant it kept them away from this world for just a little bit. A world darkened, ripped and unable to be fixed.

Azriel patted Kaden’s hair and cocked his head in a sign of asking him to leave the room. Kaden checked the young girls once again, then followed Azriel from the room, shutting the door behind him. When they were done, he would open it again. He knew from experience that once you left the room you could no longer hear any of the noise from within, and he would hate to leave and for the girls to wake up and think they were alone.

“How are you?” Azriel asked.

Kaden ran his hand over his face and through his hair. “I don’t know,” he said, and it was true.

Once Cassian had left with the assurance that Azriel would be home soon and there were enough wards on the house to keep his children safe, Kaden retired to his room. He let Quathryn have the bed, she’d spread herself out like a starfish and was dribbling on his pillow, and Thea was nice and snug in her makeshift crib on top of his pianoforte. He took the floor, finding comfort in the place he knew best.

And for the first time, as he slept that night, he knew what it was like to have an Eleana-calibre night terror. Thankfully, he was quiet, and was honestly astonished at the fact. But when he woke up, he could’ve sworn he was still there, in the mountains, watching in horror as his best friend’s ghost rose from his mutilated body. When he realised what was happening, he reached out to Eleana, desperate for her comfort, but her shield was harder than ever. He needed her now more than he ever had before, and he knew she needed him as well. There were things he needed to tell her – something that he thought he’d found out about them that she needed to know.

He cried into the crook of his own arm until he fell asleep again.

“How are the girls? I checked on Cassian just before I came home, and he said they were here.”

“They’re fine – as good as they can be.”

“Kaden…” Azriel looked hesitant but reigned himself. “We can’t find Laya. Rhys and Feyre are downstairs, and they’re starting to get really worried. I wanted to let you rest, but we need your help.”

“Of course. I want to have her home as much as anyone else.” Kaden shook out his hair and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He opened the door right before brushing past Azriel to go downstairs. He met Feyre and Rhys in the hallway, the two pale and shaking with concern. The High Lady whispered her thanks, and you could see the gratitude from the High Lord in his eyes.

He nodded at them and started to walk away, his head higher than it had been in days now that he had a purpose.

“Wait.” From behind Feyre and Rhysand, Morrigan rose from the couches. In his sleep deprived state, he didn’t even notice her. Which caused him immense guilt, as this woman had done so much for him and he had forgotten her.

Kaden turned to look at her, Mor frowning at the sight of the dark bags under his eyes. She approached him with open arms, and he let her embrace him – needing a motherly hug. “Come back soon, okay? I want you home and safe with us.”  

He hugged her back tightly, and with that, he left to find his dark rose.

_____

 

Kaden had no idea she had gone so far. No longer in the Night Court, his magic was steering him south for as long as the eye could see. It was no wonder no one had been able to track her, she’d winnowed as far as she could. From the looks of it, it seemed she was going to the Spring Court, which wouldn’t surprise him. She’d confessed to him that whenever the Night Court was too much High Lord Glaslane always welcomed her – had already this year after their disastrous first kiss.

He continued to fly, letting his mind get lost in the feel of the wind in his wings and the sound they made as he rushed to find Eleana. He barely gave any attention to the Courts that he knew were below, just wrinkled his nose at the strong smell of fire from their heaths and the surprising racket he sometimes heard. He knew nothing of the other Courts practises at night – it wouldn’t surprise him if they were awake at this hour. 

As he followed his magic, he saw that his presumptions we correct. Eleana seemed to be in the Spring Court.

He landed in a wooded area, just outside a small town on the boarder of the Autumn Court. He expected his magic to guide him towards the mansion, but it was also totally possible that in an effort to escape her own grief she wanted to avoid anyone she knew.

He tracked her with is magic, only few fae and faeries here awake. They all gave him curious looks, but he didn’t heed them any attention.

Eleana’s trail was a jagged mess, leading him out of the town and through the thick bushland, up a steep slope and left to the boarder. He stood atop the hill he had just climbed. To one side was the Spring Court, the tiny village starting to light up as more and more farmers started their day, and to the other was the Autumn Court. It was a very strange in-between. You could feel the cold winds from the Autumn Court warming as they came into Spring’s land – a phenomenon that wasn’t seen in the solar courts.

Kaden wasn’t totally sure where to go. He could see she clearly had gone into the Autumn Court, but the trail often buzzed back over to Spring, as if she’d been running, winnowing, or flying back and forth all night. It was a weirdly erratic behaviour he hadn’t been expecting at all – as if it wasn’t even Eleana.

He ventured into the Autumn Court, now taking the slopes downward in an effort to find his love. With every step, he ached more for her presence. He also needed to apologize to her for his actions. He just didn’t think straight when it came to Felix – neither of them did.

Eventually, his magic found a more definitive trail again, and as he followed it he felt like he was stepping out of a maze. The last two hours of looking for her had been an inconsistent mess, but he felt better knowing she must be close.

His lights guided him to where he needed to go, very occasionally showing him glimpses of Eleana being in the same place. The visions felt off though, in a way that made him squirm as he flew. It was like rather than looking through clear water, he had to wade his way through thick mud. Flashes of her were enough to keep him going though, regardless if they were what he was accustomed to or not.  

Her trail became farther and fewer between, so he took back to the skies, gliding over the Autumn Court. Smoke obstructed his vision slightly from the faeries beneath lighting fires to keep warm, and he found his eyes watering and squinting.

As he got closer to the Forest House, he started taking note of the smell of the smoke. It did not smell like kindling as one might presume it would, but much stronger and quite sour. The smell was actually putrid and had him gagging. He wondered what could possibly make a stench like that.

And then he heard.

There was screaming and banging as people raced through the tree tunnels, hundreds of people trying to flee the top tiers of the Forest House. In the distance, he could see High Lord Lucien spewing flames at enemies Kaden couldn’t see, and he rushed to his aide. As he got lower in altitude, Kaden’s eyes widened in trembling dread as he saw what was causing the citizens to flee.

_No._

_Not again._

_Not so soon._

There were creatures everywhere, destruction and death following in their wake. The Autumn Court sentries were doing their best to kill them and hold them back so the people could flee, but they had no idea what they were up against. Bodies, thankfully not as many as Kaden expected, were littering the ground, and he felt every loss. Their families were soon to feel the pain he had become so well versed in, and he didn’t wish that upon anybody.

He flew as fast as he could to Lucien’s side, people aiming at him with spears but backing down with a bark from Lucien. He landed at the fox’s side, skidding to a halt just feet from him.

_“What the hell is going on?”_

“They got here an hour ago and it’s been chaos since,” High Lord Lucien spat through gritted teeth, still taking aim at the crawling creatures snapping at him and his men and women. “Thank the Cauldron we had some warning from Elain. Did you come with Rhys?”

Kaden speared his magic through an oncoming creature, his heart starting to race. “I followed Eleana’s trail here.”

“She’s here somewhere? Shit.”

“Where is Lady Elain? Why isn’t Rhys here yet if you summoned him?”

“Likely because there are at least three other courts that have been hit tonight,” he growled. “I had just gotten a message from Tarquin when my servants started screaming.” A creature yelped as Lucien dealt its death blow. “And my mate is safe, locked where they can’t get to her. I love her more than I love life, and under no circumstances will she die tonight.”

Kaden joined the High Lord at his side, fending away the creatures until the room was clean of them. The soldiers with them immediately went down to join their kin in the forests, hoping to save as many lives as possible. Lucien, with Kaden at his back, ran to the vaults where magic weapons of destruction were held. Constructed by the former High Lord Beron, only the High Lord of the time could access them. With the suddenness of the attack, Lucien hadn’t had a chance to fetch them.

“How the fuck did they get in here?” Lucien hissed to himself, thinking aloud.

Kaden mulled his words over, even if they weren’t intended for him. The answer, after everything he had been through, was painfully obvious. “The tunnels in the mountains.”

Lucien muttered darkly under his breath, surging down stairs. “Find Laya. No one but I can cross this point. And hurry. I’ll send another message to Rhys for help, and let’s just pray they haven’t been hit too.”

Kaden nodded and fled, wanting to find the closest exit so he could fly and look for her from above. Every moment without her was making him panic – it felt like his blood was sticking together, his limbs becoming heavy and slow. He felt full of ick, and knowing that she was out there somewhere was making him frantic and scared. Eleana was so lovely, he wanted her safe. And yet she always found her way into the darkest situations Prythian had to offer.

His search was lengthy. He had to stop constantly to help people, and his magic was wearing thin after a fitful night’s sleep. Her trail was also still as random and sporadic as it had been before, and the only thing stopping him from keeling over and having a panic attack was the bond he could still feel was there – meaning that wherever she was she was alive.

He was stabbing a scabby creature when from above he heard the most glorious sound – wings. He killed his target, looking up to see Illyrians above.

But only forty-nine of them. He knew, because even from here he could tell it was the Elite. At their head was what looked like Felix, but no, it was Cassian.  Kaden went to join their ranks, at the side of his brothers as he should be, but he was stopped by an all-encompassing shield.

“What the f-”

“You didn’t find her then.” High Lady Feyre stepped out from seemingly nothing, head to toe in Illyrian leather and fighting gear.

“She’s in this Court.” It was the best answer he could give her.

The High lady nodded her head, her lips pressed together and a fine line of fury marring her forehead.

“The Night Court-”

“Is fine,” she answered before she could finish. “But the Illyrian legions won’t come, not after the loss of the Bloodrite and the threat to our land. The Elite are here because they are under separate orders and because of their loyalty to Felix.”

“Surely the other Courts will come to our aide.”

High Lady Feyre looked at him despairingly. “Every Court has been hit but ours. I came here because of my allegiance to Lucien. Rhys and Azriel are with Tarquin. The other Courts have been left to fend for themselves.”

Kaden’s mouth opened in shock, and he flounded in front of his High Lady. Lost for words, he stared at her with the danger of the situation pounding in his mind.

If these creatures were capable of amounting an attack on six of the seven Courts simultaneously, then there were far more of them than anyone could have initially predicted. The soil of Prythian would once more run read with the blood of its inhabitants, and the civilian loss would be cataclysmic.

“Eleana-”

“Is powerful enough that hopefully she will be able to take care of herself,” Feyre interrupted again. “But, please, I beg of you, find her. Lead me to her. I will vanquish any foe we face on the way but I need my daughter _home_. Mor is there protecting Velaris, and I would feel much better knowing Laya is with her.”

Without another word, Kaden sprinted to where he could hopefully find Eleana, but Cauldron knew if he was even going the right way. From what he could tell, she was on the move and had been all day. Either that, or his magic was failing him.

Her path led him back to the centre of the Forest House, and he realised that she must be fighting her way through the creatures to try and get to Lucien – to somewhere safe. It seemed the High Lady made the same presumption, bolting ahead of him as soon as she realised where the path was going. He raced after her – her direction ringing true.

The Forest House was on fire.

Flames were licking at nearly every surface except the highest of turrets, but even that was just bare stone meant as a watch tower. There was no way anyone could take refuge there. There were winged creatures zipping around its roof, but never approaching. The Elite were there, picking them off one by one. Kaden squinted his eyes to focus, and he could see High Lord Lucien’s flame red hair blowing from the wind the creatures were creating and also-

And also a dark mane that could only belong to one.

The High Lady looked at her daughter like a blind man seeing for the first time, a woman seeing the sun after a long winter, a restless child seeing its parent, and she whimpered, “Rhys,” to summon her mate to her side.

Kaden stepped back when suddenly Eleana’s father, smeared with blood, winnowed next to his mate with a thunderous bang. He reached for his mate’s hand and winnowed them to the tower, leaving Kaden in their dust.

He quickly followed them, using what magic he had to winnow after them. He landed on the balls of his feet, immediately pushed back by the wind tunnel they had found themselves wrapped in.  Rhys put up a barrier between them all and the creatures raging outside.

It was like being trapped in a snow globe. What were once glassless windows were now barred by the High Lord’s magic, making the wind and fire swirl around them – a light show that cast them all in hues of red and yellow.

Eleana was facing away from them, overlooking the window with her hands gripping onto its sill. She looked serene, and Kaden wanted to cry from happiness at the sight of her. She had changed since she’d left the House of Wind and was now clad in a deep purple dress with a black train, her hair styled in waves down her back. Gold cuffs encircled her wrists, and a necklace that looked so tight it was constricting was clamped around her delicate neck. 

Kaden didn’t care that it was odd that she still looked so pristine in the middle of all this – if someone could manage it, it was Eleana.

He peeked at her parents, their reactions similar to his. Lucien on the other hand looked on with trepidation, his hand gripping a dagger tightly.

“Eleana,” Feyre sighed. “Butterfly, you’re safe. Thank the Cauldron.” She put one of her hands over her heart, as if trying to contain the overwhelming relief she must have felt.

Eleana stayed silent. Kaden thought maybe she was still overwhelmingly dismayed, but he sensed no sadness from her, not even discomfort. Her hair was shining in the light, its navy set alight by the flames around them. It was growing quite warm in the room, and Kaden felt sweat start to drip down his back.

“Laya, I’m so happy to see you.” Rhys stepped forward, resting his hand on her shoulder. “We have to go home, Butterfly, these horrible creatures are everywhere.”

She reached behind him and rested her hand on his shoulder. “I think you have me confused for someone else, High Lord Rhysand.”

She turned, and her violet eyes were flashing gold.   

They all reeled back but Lucien, Rhysand snapping his hand back as though it had been burned.

“Eleana-”

“You needn’t worry, High Lord. She’s still in here. She can see everything. Hear everything. She is just no longer in control.”

Kaden’s throat constricted at the image in front of him. It was Eleana – her smell, her body, her everything – but it was not her at all. There was an inflection to her voice he had never heard, an accent from Mother knows where. The way she stood, her posture, was completely unfamiliar to him. And her eyes… oh Cauldron, those _eyes_. The deepest gold he had ever seen, it was equally fascinating and sickening.

“Who the hell are you?” Rhys growled. “And where is my daughter?”

The prettiest, most serene smile crossed Eleana’s face. “I told you, she’s still here.” Eleana, no, not Eleana, walked forward, pushing past the High Lord like he was nothing.

Lucien still had his dagger raised, and that’s when Kaden realised that Lucien had seen this woman for what she truly was before they had arrived. What he had learnt from that interaction, Kaden was sure he would know soon.

The woman stopped less than a foot away from him and raised a hand to his scarred face. Frozen by familiarity and fear, he let her push back a single lock of hair that was covering his eyes. “Golden one, so matching to her blue.” Her hand slid down, and the sweat sliding down his body felt like spiders. Swallowing hard, his eyes followed her movements. “You are so precious, so valuable to her – the most important thing.”

She cocked her head to the side, and with a flick of her wrist, they were alone.

High Lord Lucien and Rhys were gone, High Lady Feyre – all whisked away from them due to the power this woman possessed.

A power that was once Eleana’s.

The shield remained – keeping Kaden and Eleana locked in this red world while the rest of existence fell apart.

She leaned forward, pressing Eleana’s chest against him, a hand slowly sliding south. “I meant what I said. She’s here, and she can feel _everything_.”

Kaden grabbed her wrist before it could find its intended target and flinched away from the woman. “You’re a liar,” he spat. “Where is Eleana? Tell me and I will give you the quick death I’ve granted the other wretched creatures.”

“I am no creature, I am Eleana. She is still here.”

Kaden wanted to punch her – use brute force to make this woman talk. But he could never hurt Eleana, even if it was just the illusion of her. Just the thought of laying a hand on this thing in front of him rendered him incapable.

“There is no way. Not even the strongest of daemati could penetrate her mind unless she wished it.”

“Has the thought ever crossed your mind that maybe she had?”

“No.”

She chuckled to herself, pacing back and forth in front of him.

Kaden was perplexed, and scared, and so very confused but the one thing he did know is that he held no power in this conversation.

“Fae, the most stupid species of them all. You know, I never did like the fae. Not just your kind, but them all. Even the ones who are halted by iron or have all their other forms.”

“You can’t call fae stupid and then claim iron hurts us. Do you know nothing?”

“On the contrary, I know more than you could ever comprehend.” She smiled at him, amused. Like he was a puppet in a show she was controlling. “I could entertain you by telling you stories of wolves and hawks and bitch queens with a world burned in fire – or maybe the story of how my kin learnt to create the most vicious but subservient life from nothing.”

Kaden reeled back once again, her words painting a very vivid picture in his mind. A thing, her, who had learnt to create life from nothing, the creatures, and bend them to its will. He was starting to see this woman in a new light. Before, he had been worried about where his dark rose was, even if all his magic was leading him here screaming _here she is, this is what you’ve been looking for._ Now, as he stood in front of this woman, he finally knew the answer to the question they had all been asking for a very long time.

“You made the creatures – you control them.”

Her answering smirk was as vicious as the smile of an Impeath, a look he had never seen on his lover’s face.

Now looking at her, at her sophisticated dress and jewels, a memory was served to him. A memory of Eleana and him on a rock, a day held most dear in his heart, when they rejected a present from the forest because it felt so different and foreign. Not a collar at all – but a twin to what she was wearing now.

“And now you’re controlling Eleana’s body – inhabiting it.” It was no longer a shocking realisation. One that has the power to do what this woman had already done likely was also capable of taking Eleana.

She clicked her fingers as she said, “Ding ding ding, right again.”

“But why?” His voice cracked, and his body became ridged as she stepped towards him again.

Her face, previously so cocky, changed into something darker. “Because I am tired. I have travelled between existences, and in every one there is an uproar that has killed legions of my family. I am done. What would a mortal say? I am no longer the sheep, but the wolf.”

“Why do you have Eleana?” Kaden threw up his arms, furiously gesturing to the chaos still raging on outside. “Look at what you’ve done already. Let her go, I beg of you.”

“It’s not Eleana I need – it is her magic. Some of the strongest I’ve ever seen, definitely the strongest from this hole of a place. You can rest assured, I gave her a good deal for it.”

“Eleana would never give herself over to something that has caused the Night Court such pain.”

“She would if it meant the end to the Night Court’s suffering.” She circled around him, her train elegantly following her. “Go home, my golden one. I will not touch you there.” Her smile returned. “That is, unless you want to be touched. Then you are welcome to find me.”

“I am not leaving. Not without Eleana.”

The rising sun glinted off her fangs as she smiled. “Then you will be here a long time.”

With that, she was gone and the encasement around the building followed suit – unleashing the real world on him once again.

 

_____

 

Eleana imagined this is what it would feel like to be stuck at the end of a bottomless well. Pitch black to all sides, with nothing but ringing voices as the queen who had taken shelter in her body talked to Kaden. Eleana felt like she was crying, but there were no physical tears. Eleana didn’t think there was anything physical about her anymore at all.

She just hoped her sacrifice had been worth the price – that the bargain she had struck that tattooed her ankle would be met.

She hoped that soon the inky blackness around her might also envelope her. Might save her from this awful fate.

She truly could feel everything.

 

 

 

 


	29. Chapter 29

Kaden landed in the House of Wind, Azriel rushing to his side as he did.

Kaden brushed past him, still covered in the blood of the creatures and walked to the war room where everyone had been summoned to.

After Eleana’s disappearance, the attacks just stopped. As she winnowed away, so did every beast from the Autumn Court. From all accounts, it was at the same time that the other courts were released from their hell as well. They waited an hour to see if they’d return from their hiding spot, but they didn’t. In the meantime, Kaden helped move the dead so they could be found and identified by their families.

Kaden picked the tips of his nails off as he frantically walked through the house, just wanting the blood of those _things_ off him and the traces of the bodies he handled well away.

“Kaden,” Azriel called as he followed him.

Kaden ignored him. His head too full to listen to anyone right now – the image of Felix, body contorted and bloody, split open – the image of Eleana, with eyes that were inhuman and impossible. He could barely breath, let alone tumble out enough words for his uncle to understand how he was feeling.

He burst into the war room, the elders already gathered. Thea was in her crib in the corner, Quathryn next to her on a mat with toys laid around her. She looked up at his entrance, and her eyes widened in fear at his appearance. Quathryn was not the only one looking at him, Eleana’s family all turned their gazes on him.

Morrigan took one look at his face and marched over to him, shaking him at the shoulders. “Stop twitching.”

Had he been?

“Everything will be fine. We’ll get her back.”

He shook his head at her, the people around him turning into a blurry haze.

“Kaden.” High Lady Feyre. “I need you to focus. We need to know what happened after she expelled everyone. What did she say? How did she possibly take Eleana from us?”

He heard a faint buzzing in his head. He put his hand to his temple, squeezing his eyes shut. Was it buzzing, or was it Eleana’s voice? Or Felix’s? He didn’t know.

“You have to tell us everything. It is imperative to helping her.”

Eleana’s hands on his body – but not her accent, not her gentleness.

“Was there any hint from your conversation on how we might separate it from Eleana?”

_He didn’t know he didn’t know he did know he didn’t know he didn’t-_

He opened his eyes and he was on the floor. Azriel and Cassian were hovering above him and Mor was supporting his head. He could see others flittering around, someone calling for a healer. He tried to protest, but no words left his mouth. His eyelids dropped, the crushing weight of them stopping him from keeping his eyes open for long.

His life came in flashes.

Mor above him crying.

High Lord Rhysand and Azriel lifting him and carrying him away.

A bed that felt like knives in his back and wings.

A healer above him, touching and prodding but not looking at his face. “It looks to me like he had an anxiety attack, and I’m not surprised at all. The poor boy must feel like he’s lost everything,” the fae woman said.

“He may as well have,” High Lady Feyre whispered. “His mother, his family, Felix and now Eleana.” Her voice cracked. “I should have made sure he was okay before I interrogated him like that.”

“Feyre, it’s okay-”

“No it damn well isn’t Rhys. What has our grief turned us into, if we’re more concerned about information than the wellbeing of one of our children?”

“He’s a solider, we couldn’t have predicted this-”

“When I used to return from the Night Court,” her voice turned strained, like the words were claws in her throat, “I was used instead of cared for, and it made me sick. I just did that to him.”

Kaden slowly lifted himself onto his elbows, effectively stopping any further conversations. They all crowded around his bed, Mor lovingly, but forcefully, pushing him back down.

“Take it easy, honey,” Mor ushered.

“I’m fine,” Kaden croaked, rising again. He rubbed at his eyes, glad to see everything was clear again. “I have to – go – Eleana – I have to get up.” He swung his legs over the edge of the bed as he stuttered.

“You’re not going anywhere.” Azriel sat next to him and put his arm around his shoulder.

“Yes, I am. It said that I could go to her if I wanted. I have to find Eleana, to find a way to break her bargain-”

“Bargain?” Rhys interrupted. “What are you talking about.”

Kaden stood, shoving his way past them all. He walked down the hall, heading for the window so he could fly out. The thing in Eleana seemed oddly fascinated with him – he was sure that if he walked into the mountains he probably wouldn’t die. And if he did, hopefully he would have enough time to first save his love.

The thing that stopped him was a small, quiet voice. The only voice that could have.

“Kaden!” Quathryn called. She trotted out of the library with a toy bear in her hand and a blanket around her shoulders. She must have been trying to nap. Nesta was behind her, mirroring every one of her daughter’s steps.

“Hello, Little One.” He padded over to her and knelt down in front of her.

“You dirty.” She wrinkled her nose and poked his cheek.

“You’re right there.”

He heard a click from behind him, and the grime covering him was gone. Quathryn widened her eyes in fascination, and poked at his cheek again.

“Kaden?”

“Yes?”

“Lis?”

Kaden wondered if there was ever going to be a day where she stopped asking him where her brother was – having become so accustomed to seeing Kaden at his side. With dread, Kaden knew that one day the question of where is Felix, would turn to why didn’t you save him, or just her outright blaming him for his death.

“He’s still gone, but he loves you very, very much. He told me to tell you.”

She nodded, like Kaden had said the most sensible thing in the world.

Cassian joined Kaden at his side and opened his arms for Quathryn to stumble into. Over her head, Cassian looked at Kaden. “I know, more than anyone, how hard everything is right now,” he said quietly. “You running off to find Eleana won’t help anyone, and it won’t bring my son back. But telling us what you know could save lives.” He kissed Quathryn’s curls, rubbing her back in soothing motions. “We need to know what happened in the Autumn Court – not just to help Eleana, who we _will_ bring back, but also to stop any more death. To make sure Prythian is safe for our families.”

Kaden held back tears. “Quathryn is safe here.”

“Nowhere is safe anymore.”

“It is in the Night Court.” Kaden fiddled with his fingers as he recounted for them what the thing in Eleana had told him. From what Kaden could tell, Eleana had willingly given over her body in an effort to save the Night Court, and furthermore her family, from any pain or destruction.  

High Lady Feyre had her brows furrowed the whole time, her hand over her mouth. “That doesn’t sound right.”

“What do you mean?” Nesta asked.

“It’s not enough. I know my daughter, and she would have fought first. If Eleana did indeed make this bargain, and for all we know we’re being lied to, there has to be something else, more that she was promised.”

“And one thing is for sure,” High Lord Rhysand continued, “is that no one outside of this room will know the truth. Lucien may suspect, and him and Elain can know, but this is to never be mentioned again. We will not tell the other Courts and let them believe Eleana is there against her will.”

“There’s something else we must consider.” Azriel was shrouded in his shadows, a rippling bleakness Kaden had never seen from him. He was standing back, listening to Kaden thoughtfully and with the eye only a shadowsinger could. “If Eleana made a bargain with this, what does it consider itself? A queen? Then there may be no way to free her.”

They all stiffened at his words.

“There must be a way…” Feyre trailed. “Rhys?”

“I…” The High Lord went pale, his hands quivering. A weight pressed into the room, a feeling Kaden was all too familiar with. It was the same as when Eleana’s emotions became too much, and her magic swelled.

For a moment it was suffocating – the magic and the memories – but the weight disappeared, the High Lord far more accustomed to keeping himself in order. “As far as I know, there is no way. I made sure of it when – when I made my bargain with you. But Amren is returning in the coming hours, and she will know for sure.”

“We’re meeting with the High Lords tomorrow if they still agree to come. What can we say to them?” Cassian asked as he rose from the ground, Quathryn still in his arms.

“We need to act as though they know about Laya,” Nesta said. The others gave her strange looks, but she continued. “We can’t assume that the only place this ‘queen’ went was the Autumn Court. We know for a fact she hit all the other Courts, and it’s unlikely she decided to show herself off only to us. We also need to lie about why we weren’t attacked. I suggest we say it’s because they just massacred us at the Bloodrite.”

“What do we tell them about Eleana?” Kaden asked the older woman.

“We tell them she was taken by force. They can’t, under any circumstance, know that she may have done this willingly. If they do, I fear they will kill her. Or, if we find a way to save her, they will never forgive her, and the Night Court will once again have cursed leadership.”

Kaden felt grave as the significance of Eleana’s decision hit him. He once told Eleana that he felt older than his twenty years, and now he also felt heavy. The weight of the decisions that needed to be made, of his role here, of his dread and misery, all made him feel like he was slowly sinking and morphing into the mountain under him.

“And what do we do now?” Kaden was not defeated, not yet, but he sure as hell was beaten down.

“You need to sleep my golden child.” Mor reached a hand down to help him stand, keeping a hold of him even when he was on his feet, as if at any moment he might go tumbling down. With resignation, he admitted to himself that that was very much a possibility.

He looked at her, silently asking with his eyes how he could possibly sleep in a moment such as this. Mor, sighing deeply, led him away with a pointed glance at Nesta who then followed. He lay where he did not long before, Mor comforting and calming him the way he always imagined a mother would. As he went to thank her, Nesta reached out and ran her thumb down his cheek. And with that, darkness overwhelmed him, and he finally slept.

____

 

“Tarquin sent another note. Their causalities have risen; four villages outside the city were attacked too quickly to warn Adriata.” Azriel placed the parchment in front of Cassian, his burnt hands looking like moving lava in the wavering candle light.

Cassian rubbed his hands over his face in a useless effort to wake himself up. He envied the deep sleep Kaden had been subjected to at the lovely and deadly hands of his wife, a power that she rarely used but came in handy. Even Thea was quiet this afternoon, but he guessed she did not have the same worries they all did. And he was glad of it – the only solace he could find in the past few days was that his girls were not in pain. But he and Nesta… he wished he could take it from his wife, so that at least one of them could be functional for their daughters. Although, he did not know how he could possible bear more pain than he already did. For the first time in a long time, he felt all seven hundred years of his life, but none of the happy memories. No, Cassian felt like he had been damned. It would be unbearable if not for his daughters and mate. He might not wish to continue this life at all if not for them. Might give himself to the Other Side just to see his precious son again.

Cassian voiced something to Azriel he had yet to say aloud. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

“Do what?” his brother queried, leafing through more and more letters they were receiving.

Cassian pinched the top of his nose, the words unable to leave him. He slumped at his desk, his head bowed. Azriel, noting his silence, came behind him and put a hand on his shoulder.

“Speak, Cassian.”

“I can’t lead the armies. Not like this.”

“Elaborate.”

“I can’t _think_. I’m barely managing to hold together my family, let alone thousands of soldiers. I miss him so damn much.” His voice broke at the mention of his son, his beautiful Felix. “To think that I can’t just fly to the camp to see him. That I’ll never hear his voice again, or taste his cooking, or see him taking such wonderful care of Quathryn and Thea.”

“You should speak to Rhys. You’re right, you’re in no state to help anybody.” His words were harsh but said with a gentleness that Cass knew was just his brother giving him the hard truth when he needed it.

“I can’t even give him his proper funeral rights.”

Cassian needed to stop talking. He was very quickly spiralling to a place he did not want to go – somewhere he might not be able to come back from. But there was one other thing on his mind, something that caused him a crushing amount of guilt, to the point where he had been physically sick. He considered confessing to Azriel, but if said aloud then he truly was a repulsive person.

Every time he saw Rhys hide behind Feyre, the two curling into each other, he couldn’t help but think _at least your child is still alive._

How utterly horrendous of a thought about a child he loved so dearly. And Cauldron, what kind of person was he if he could be so self-centred when his brother was in immeasurable pain.

So no, that was not something he needed to share with Azriel.

“When it’s safer we’ll recover his body.”

Cassian wanted to say more, but a familiar tugging pulled on his gut. He groaned in frustration, muttering his annoyance under his breath.

“What?” Azriel raised a brow.

“There’s someone triggering the wards at the house. I can’t be fucked dealing with whoever it is right now. I just want to sleep and throw every one of these correspondents into a fire.” He pushed all the letters in front of him away and got up from his chair. He may not want to deal with the person at his home, but he was still the General. As much as he wanted to abandon his duties and hide, he could not.

“Go to your girls, Cassian. I’ll go deal with whoever is at your house.”

He looked at Azriel gratefully. He hugged his brother, walking with him until he left through a trapdoor to fly into the city.   

____

 

There was a lot of work to do – research and evaluations and strategies to be made – and Feyre was glad for the chance to breath. She was waiting on the docks in silence, Rhys beside her, not touching, the only sound the lapping of the waves as they hit the pier. The sand from the beach pricked against her skin in the wind, little tiny knives making even smaller cuts – a strangely relaxing feeling. They had left the others at the House of Wind, which had been a good choice. Nesta refused to leave her daughters, and Feyre thought it a miracle she was able to convince Cassian to go to the Autumn Court with her that morning. As for Mor, she was now keeping a watchful eye on Eleana’s young mate. It was nice, really, that she had taken the child in as she had. Both Mor and Az truly did act as though they were his parents, and in another life they could have been. Feyre wondered if Azriel regretted not taking Kaden when he was younger, and knowing the Illyrian bastard quite well, he surely did.

“I can see her.” Her mate’s voice was flat and tired, so she linked their hands, trying to give him the strength he would need to get through this time.

She looked out to the sea in the direction he was, and felt relief enter her body as she saw the ship in the distance, one she hadn’t seen for nearly two years.

Amren had not been planning on coming back so soon, but desperate times called for desperate measures. And if after this war Amren wanted to sail away with Varian again, Feyre would not blame her.

Feyre waved to the fast-oncoming ship, all the way until it docked.

She only stopped when a short woman with long black hair stepped off the boat, nothing on her except her clothes and various knives at her sides.

“Amren,” Feyre breathed. She quickly approached her old friend, squeezing her in a hug. Amren wasn’t usually the type to hug, but there were always exceptions to the rules.

“You smell like blood – but not fae. What is that? It’s disgusting.”

Of course that would be the first thing Amren said.

“And where’s Eleana?” Amren pulled back from their hug, walking to Rhys to greet him as well. “I expected her to be here considering she was the one who figured this all out.”

Rhys dropped the arms he had been holding out and stared blankly away. Feyre went to his side, and pressed her forehead into his shoulder, her breaths shuddering.

“Where is she?” Amren said slowly.

“She’s gone,” was Rhys’ strained response.

“Is she dead?”

“Not yet.”

“Then stop moping, we have work to do.”

_____

 

Kaden was abruptly awoken by the loud slamming of a door. The window to his right showed the setting of the sun, meaning he’d gotten at least a few hours sleep. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and rose, stretching his back, shoulders and wings before heading towards all the noise.

He entered the war room, to see the walls had been stripped of the evidence that Felix and Eleana had given the Inner Circle to convince them of the creatures. He noticed four satchels filled with files and wondered where they could be possibly taking them.

He was going to ask Morrigan, but before he could turn an ominous voice spoke to him.

“So, you’re the boy everyone has been fussing over. Personally, I’m underwhelmed.”

He gulped and turned to face the female voice.  

The fae in front of him was short, very short, with steel grey eyes and hair neatly braided to her waist. Her face was hard, all angles and bones, and her prettiness did not distract from the look on her face. She smelt like salt water and timber, and stood like she was the one who towered over him.

“You must be Eleana and Felix’s Aunt Amren. I’m Kaden, it’s nice to meet you.”

She looked him up and down. “Tell me, Kaden, do you love my niece?”

He was surprised by her question, but he answered quickly and honestly. “Yes.”

“See, there’s something here that I find peculiar.” She circled around him like she was a lioness and he a wounded deer. “You meet my niece, and the next week Felix is attacked by an ‘Impeath.’ Quite soon after that, Eleana is taken by a ‘Colloden,’ a creature neither Rhys nor Azriel could find, but somehow you had no trouble locating and killing. This Colloden, despite endless searches is nowhere to be seen, but then just happens upon you and Eleana when you’re alone at camp and the rest of her family are in Velaris. Then, there’s the Bloodrite, where thousands of Illyrians died, especially in the area you were in, but you’re fine, and Felix is dead. Despite being the strongest Illyrian in an age, certainly more powerful than his father, he’s just gone and you just so happened to be the only one to see it. You were also the only one that creature spoke to about Eleana. All I’ve heard is how strong and promising you are, but all I see is a meek little boy who was raised by a monster.” She stopped less than a foot away from his back, and hissed into his ear, “Eleana was never as erratic as she was until she met you. So tell me, do you love my niece, or are you the one who caused her downfall?”

Kaden took a step forward and did not give her preposterous theory the time of day by looking back at her.

“With all due respect, Amren, I have never heard anything so ridiculous in my life.”

“So if I approached my High Lord and Lady with this you wouldn’t be fazed.”

“Do as you please.” He started to leave but her words speared him into place.

“I’ll be watching you. Every move. Every breath. Every word. I’ve lived longer than your mind can comprehend.”

“I look forward to getting to know you then. But, as I’m sure you can understand, I have other priorities first.”

“Kaden, you’re awake! And Amren, what are you doing here?” Cassian burst into the room, Thea strapped to his chest, and weapons coating his legs. He picked up the bags with the files, spinning to face the two.

“Are you ready to go?” She deflected his question with another, and Kaden was thoroughly confused.

“Where are you going?”

“It’s the High Lords,” Cassian spoke. “They don’t want to wait until tomorrow, so we’re leaving now to go to our other house near the Court of Nightmares. The meeting is in an hour.”

“An hour? Shit.” Kaden took two bags from Cassian and followed him. “What do you want me to do?”

“You’ll have to ask Rhys or Feyre.”

Cassian led them to the library, where Nesta was picking books from the shelves and shoving them into a bag. From the titles, Kaden was able to gather that they were all various copies of the fairy tale books the creatures were from. Quathryn was at her side, copying her every movement, but her books just thudded onto the floor.

Rhys and Feyre were hurriedly talking to Mor. From the sounds of it, she would remain in the city proper. As every day passed, more and more faeries were arriving hoping it would be safer than their villages. Word of the attack at the Bloodrite had spread quickly, and now that the other Courts had been so openly and devastatingly attacked people were thronging to Velaris.

“Where’s your summer prince, Amren?”

“He’s at Tarquin’s side, where he should be if there is going to be a war. Where’s Azriel?”

“He went to check out some wards that went off. Nothing threatening, just people getting too close.”  

High Lady Feyre, High Lord Rhysand and Morrigan looked over at the sound of their voices. Mor smiled thinly and bid goodbye to Feyre and Rhys, who promptly left the library. She neared Kaden and linked their arms. She inspected him, and he gave her the warmest smile he could muster. Deciding it wasn’t good enough, he just wrapped his arms around her in a hug.

“Oh, honey.” Her hugs were the most nurturing thing Kaden had ever encountered, and he hadn’t quite realised how much he’d needed that until now. “Amren,” she said over his head, “this is Azriel and I’s… newest addition to the family.” She let him go. “I would give you both a proper introduction, but we don’t have time. You need to join Feyre and Rhys now. Cassian and Nesta will be there soon.”

Amren nodded and without another word departed. Nesta and Cassian soon left as well, leaving the girls in the capable hands of Mor, who took them to prepare for bed. Kaden would leave soon too, he was just waiting on Azriel.

It did not take him long to arrive, and when he did his shadows were dancing around him furiously, the look on his face even stormier. He brought with him a faint scent of iron and magic, a curious concoction Kaden had never encountered.

Azriel weaved through the high shelves before stopping just before he rammed into Kaden.

“Listen to me carefully,” he growled under his breath.

It made Kaden’s hair immediately stand on end, and his heart beat faster.

“You and I aren’t going to the meeting – I need you for something else. No one can know what we’re doing. Not Cassian, or Feyre, not even Mor. Stay completely silent until I tell you to speak. We’re going to a place where the inhabitants would try to kill you in a second. Nod if you understand.”

Kaden nodded, eyes wide.

“Follow me.”

They left the House of Wind, flying quickly away. They were going the opposite direction to where the High Lady and Lord had, but Kaden kept quiet. Even as they flew over the city and started flying over the water. For maybe a half hour, Kaden stayed in Azriel’s presence, only ever looking down to observe how his dark shadow glided over the water, making it seem like they were being followed by a sea monster. As they flew, the sun set, and his shadow monster disappeared. Kaden’s fear and adrenaline spiked with every beat of his wing, and by the time he spied a small island in the distance he was ready to face whatever for Azriel had brought him to confront.

They landed on the green island. It had rolling hills for as far as the eyes could see, the view only being interrupted twice by two stone buildings. Each only the size of a single room, one was much taller than him and the other waist height.  They entered the shorter of the two, Kaden bending down then nearly tripping on the huge steps that took them down, down, down until the candles lining the walls were the only source of light. Also lining the walls were thick, iron bars that made up one-person cells.

This was a prison.

Kaden had no theories on why Azriel had brought him here, but that was of no concern. He trusted Azriel completely, and whatever he was doing here would surely soon be revealed.

They stopped only when the stairs did, at the bottom most cell. It was bigger than most, and from looking at the various apparatuses on the walls, it was clear this was the interrogation portion of the prison.

It reminded Kaden of his childhood room.

Kaden could see a figure in the corner, standing face forwards but too in the dark to make out his features. Kaden waited for Azriel to say something, but the man beside him was making no noise at all – it didn’t even sound like he was breathing.

The figure shuffled, his stance – straight back, crossed arms, legs shoulder width apart – told Kaden of the power and confidence this man had. His face was still in the dark, but Kaden could make out the garish scars that ran down the man’s body – scars nearly as horrific as his own.  

His voice was gruff from disuse, yet the sound as silky as the satin between a lady’s thighs. “I thought it would be much longer until I saw you again.”

He stepped forward, and Kaden slammed himself back in terror.  


	30. Chapter 30

Rhys sat in the atrium turned war room, calmly waiting as the other High Lords and their entourages sat. Or more rather he looked calm. He felt sick to his stomach, clutching Feyre’s hand tightly.

They were all in a wide circle, the middle taken up by a round table with a map of Prythian covering it.  Places where there were confirmed creature attacks were highlighted in red, suspected attacks blue, and potential attacks yellow. All the potential places had been compiled by Cassian and Azriel over the last twenty-four hours, and Rhys was sure more of the map would become the colour once the other courts had their input.

Rhys leant back to where Cassian was sitting behind him. “Where are Azriel and Kaden?” he hissed.

“They’re not coming, some issue arose. Az said they would try to make it.”

“Is he kidding? This is not the time for something else.”

Cassian shook his head. “I don’t know what to tell you other than I’m sure it’s important.”

Rhys sighed and tightened his grip on his wife.

“Thank you all for coming after the events of this morning,” Feyre opened after they’d all sat and settled.

The tension in the room was so thick it felt like you were inhaling it with every breath. Rhys stared at them all – the trauma their courts faced evident in everyone. To his left was Lucien, who had the least amount of deaths in his court but the most physical destruction. Next to him was Glaslane, his hair in disarray and his clothes still stained from the battle this morning. Rhys sympathised with the young fae; it was his first true battle, all the other High Lords seasoned warriors at this point. Thesan had not donned his usual ornamental gold and ruby clothing, he too still wearing his battle clothes. The Dawn court had the highest number of fatalities among the courts, including the youngest brother of Thesan’s mate – a gut-wrenching loss for the males. This was especially devastating, as the majority of his Peregryn forces were across the sea collecting information on a project Thesan didn’t disclose.  Kallias, next in the circle with Viviane close at his side, was lucky in battle. They were, by random chance and the luck of the Cauldron, having their annual Winter Games. All his soldiers and most of his citizens were in the capital, meaning his army could more easily defend the Court. Helion had not been so lucky, the High Lord gravely injured himself, unable and not willing to find a healer until the creatures were gone. His right arm was in a sling, and it was unclear if he would ever have full use of it again. Lastly, on Rhysand’s right, was Tarquin. Without the Night Court forces Rhys had been able to provide, the damage would have been much, much worse, but it was still significant.

Rhys didn’t know what the others were thinking. He couldn’t imagine the thoughts running through their heads at such a sudden attack. There was a war on the way, and until today they didn’t even know about it.

“I appreciate the pleasantries, Feyre, but we did not come here for that.” Thesan’s voice sounded like gravel as a body was dragged along it. “I’m not going to sit here and pretend that it wasn’t your daughter who ravaged my court.”

“It wasn’t Eleana,” Feyre began.

“I saw her with my own eyes,” Viviane finished. “She was at our Court too.”

“And mine,” Glaslane said, though it clearly pained him. He and Eleana were friends, and it would hurt him to think she was capable of such things. 

“We know, but please listen to us,” Rhys begged. “We know it was Eleana, but it wasn’t _really_ her.” Rhys gave them an edited version of what had happened to his daughter, making no elusions to the possibility that she may have done this herself nor that Felix was dead.

“Rhys, you know I think highly of you, but I wouldn’t put it past you to lie if your daughter was in danger. How do we know you’re telling the truth?” Tarquin asked.

“I don’t need to tell you stories of her, you all know her well.  Tarquin, she came to you months ago about attacks she feared were related to each other. Varian can attest to the grief we have felt losing her.”

“With all due respect, that means nothing Rhysand. With great power comes an easy demise at your own hands. As much as I hate to say it, it’s not out of the realm of possibility that she turned mad,” Thesan said.

“You’re wrong.” Everyone in the room snapped their gaze to Glaslane. “She told me her theory about the creatures at Starfall. It was I that urged her not to share with anyone else, lest she be ridiculed by such a preposterous idea. But I also said to find more proof and it seemed she did. And while she investigated this, so did I.” Glaslane reached down and pulled a stack of notebooks from a satchel, standing and passing them around. “Eleana was scared, but the girl’s smart; she knew exactly what was happening in my court. If you had seen her you would know there’s no way she orchestrated all this. I swear by it.”

The High Lords and Ladies started flipping through the books.

“My research led me to our once-sacred mountain. It was there I discovered where I believe the leader of the creatures first came to Prythian – through a magical portal of sorts. It was a room full of strange artefacts and symbols, ones that would glow at your touch.”

“Can you lead us there?” asked Helion.

“No, I destroyed it upon realising what it was. I couldn’t let anything else come through – though I do believe only this one woman did. But her magic is dark, something I fear we haven’t seen before. Her grasp over life and death is something reminiscent of the Cauldron.”

“This information is… staggering,” Viviane whispered, turning to her mate with fear in her eyes.

“But why Eleana?” Thesan prodded.

“Besides her obvious power, there’s something else.” Glaslane turned to stare at Rhys, his eyes ablaze. “Every track, every trail, every sign, leads back to the Night Court.”

____

 

Kaden was tempted to murder the thing behind the iron bars. His hands went to the blades at his sides, his feet shifted into a fighting stance, and he bared his teeth and snarled.

“Not the warm welcome I was expecting, but that’s okay; I still love you.”

Kaden launched himself, and Azriel caught him by the back of his shirt and yanked him back. “Calm down, son.”

“ _What the hell is that.”_

“Well, it claims to be Felix. We know better, of course. Whatever magic it has can’t be used in its cell though, so just calm down.” 

“Where did you find it?”

“It set off the wards at Cassian and Nesta’s. It was trying to enter the house.”

Kaden’s being buzzed in anger. Visibly shaking, he looked the horrid thing in the cell up and down. “You’ve chosen the wrong form to take.” Kaden spat in its direction, the thing behind the bars wiping the saliva off his crinkled face.

“At any other time that might have turned me on a little, but I hope you know how disgusting that was.”

Hearing words that once might have come out of Felix’s mouth, and in his voice, revolted every cell in Kaden’s body. It was lucky Azriel was here to hold him back, or Kaden would have had a field day ruining this thing. He would replicate everything his brothers did to him as a child, then make it worse.

“I will kill you, and I’ll enjoy every second of it.”

“And you thought I was the dramatic one. You put me to shame!”

It grinned so widely Kaden felt blinded by it. He turned his face away, looking to Azriel. The older male was observing the interactions thoughtfully and didn’t look as though he was going to add anything.

“Now,” the thing said. “Let’s stop dallying and get me out of here. I have little sisters and one very emotional cousin to attend to.”

Kaden and Azriel gave it dirty looks. It rolled its eyes in response and continued on.

“Speaking of my sisters, have you done what I asked Kaden?” For the first time, the thing faltered, his forehead creasing and doubt transforming his eyes. “I’m not sure how long I was gone for… The last thing I remember before awaking was telling you goodbye. How long has it been? Quathryn and Thea are still small, yeah? I hope they are.”

Kaden grabbed on to Azriel’s arm, pawing at him the way a hurt animal seeking comfort might.

“Don’t listen to it,” Azriel whispered. “I believe it has daemati abilities. It knows so much because you do.”

“But its magic isn’t supposed to work.”

“Potentially if it was strong enough, it might be able to read our thoughts from inside. Rhys can; I’m sure Eleana could, too.”

“Not daemati, but as good looking as one. How can I prove to you that it’s really me? I’ll tell you anything you need to hear to know for sure who I am.”

“Not an option,” Kaden snarled. “If you’re daemati you’d know everything we do, which I’m sure you’ve already guessed.”

“Kaden, please. It’s me, I swear on the Cauldron it’s me.”

Kaden turned his back to it, stepping in front of Azriel so their eyes were level and he could pretend that there was nothing behind him. “Why did you bring me here? Let’s just burn it and be done with this.”

Azriel put his hands on Kaden’s shoulders. “I needed you here because this thing set off the wards, but also got into the house. It never should have been able to cross the fences into the yard.”

“What does that mean?”

“That its powerful enough to get around something Rhys, Mor and Feyre all made together or…” Azriel trailed off, not needed to say the words aloud for Kaden to know what they are.

“Or it’s Felix, and we know what the other part of Eleana’s bargain was.”

“Indeed.”

Kaden turned back to the thing, who was leaning on the bars listening in on their conversation.

“Eleana made a deal? Do I even want to know what she’s gotten herself into now?”

The sound of Eleana’s name in his mouth felt like scissors being jammed into Kaden’s ears. It was an excruciating reminder that his best friend was dead, the love of his life may as goddamn well be, and there was shit all he could do about it.

Kaden couldn’t be held back this time as he snapped, pulling the thing to him by its hair and slamming his fist into its face, once, twice, again. He snapped his hand back to do it again but was bested by the thing who used Kaden’s hold of his hair to pull him forward and slam him into the bars.

“ _Stop_ ,” his voice boomed through the halls. “You are better than this. You don’t needlessly attack people. You don’t fight people when it’s not fair.”

“You don’t know me.”

“I know you better than anyone.”

“No, Felix did. Eleana did. And then he left, and she did, and maybe my conscious and morality followed along after them.”

“You are no beast.”

“I wasn’t before, but you dare utter her name again and I’ll happily kill you, fair fight or not.”

_____

 

“What are you implying?” Feyre was scandalised, Glaslane wouldn’t seriously implicate them in this?

“It’s no secret that the Night Court lives and breeds _power_. By all accounts, Eleana’s magic shouldn’t even be able to exist at her age, let alone for someone who isn’t even a High Lady yet. And correct me if I’m wrong, but she hasn’t started displaying the signs of inheriting yours, hers just keeps growing and growing.”

“That’s correct.”

“Pair that with the most powerful High Lord to ever exist, the first High Lady to ever exist, as well as an Inner Circle who all in their own right have a peculiar amount of strength, and what do you get? A beacon to anyone who comes here and can sense magic. I’m not implying you had anything to do with this, I know for a fact you don’t, but it also doesn’t surprise me that this creature decided Eleana was the perfect vessel for her.”

“That makes sense,” Kallias affirmed. “Furthermore, it seems to align with what we think this so-called queen’s motivations are. It wants control more than anything else, what did you say it called her creatures? The most vicious yet subservient form of life?”

“Indeed, she did.” Feyre was near positive on it. Of course, it was Kaden that had heard those words, not her, and repeated them.

The fae in the room nodded in agreement, all still skimming through the notebooks Glaslane had given them. The moment of silence that had followed Glaslane’s revelation was a welcome one. It gave them all an opportunity to reflect on the information that had been given to them. What struck Feyre the most, and what often crossed her and her mate’s mind, was how many people Eleana had confided in about the creature attacks before them. It was somewhat comforting to think it was only the High Lord of the Spring Court’s words that led Eleana to her secrecy, but Feyre also knew the truth.

At one point, her daughter had stopped trusting her. And now that Feyre knew the whole truth, she couldn’t delude herself into thinking anything else. The moment that had led to this was another memory that was scarred in her mind. When Eleana had brought the fatal, bloodied Felix home, claiming that he had been attacked by an Impeath, Feyre hadn’t even tried to believe her story.

Next week would have been Felix’s twenty-fifth birthday, and only a few days after would have been Eleana’s eighteenth. When Eleana was born, a bloody affair itself, they joked that the real reason she came early was because her and Felix couldn’t wait to be best friends any longer.

“So, what next?” Kallias broke the silence.

Rhys looked at Kallias, then all others in the room.

“Next, we go to war.”

_____

 

Azriel used the hilt of his sword to beat the thing’s hands off of Kaden, pulling his son back. He opened his mouth, likely to tell him off, but Kaden had other ideas.

“I know how to prove it’s really you.”

“Do tell; as lovely as this cell is I’d rather my nice room at camp, thank you very much.” His tone was dripping with a sarcasm so familiar it made Kaden’s heart ache.

“Tell us something we don’t know. Something that only Felix knows that we can verify.”

Azriel looked impressed at the suggestion.

The thing claiming to be Felix looked hesitant, and it was just another nail in its coffin.

“See, you can’t!” Kaden drew a blade. “Can I kill it now?”

“Kaden,” it whispered. “If I know something none of you do it’s because it would hurt you, and I don’t want to do that.”

“What an incredibly predictable excuse.”

It sighed. “Your brother Leeam has a bastard child with a fae he assaulted. He doesn’t know about it, but I moved both her and the child to the Spring Court, where she now works as a maid for Glaslane in the mansion.”

Kaden shut his mouth.

There was silence after the statement, the thing looking at the floor regretfully. “I wanted to tell you, truly. But the mother is someone I know, and she swore me to secrecy. She’s happy now, and safe. Glaslane made sure to keep her and the baby well.”

Kaden didn’t respond, not sure what to do with the information. He glanced at Azriel, who’s jaw had set, and eyes had narrowed. “It will take me one, maybe two hours to confirm this. Kaden, you stay here and guard it. I’ll be back soon.”

“I should come with you-”

“Glaslane is currently at the meeting with Feyre and Rhys, and I’m sorry but right now you have no hold over your emotions. We need to be discreet about this. Cassian and Nesta can’t know anything until we’ve confirmed what exactly this is. Stay here, and make sure it doesn’t go anywhere.”

_____

 

They had to know what they were up against, and that included showing the fae in the room the specimen they had retrieved after the Bloodrite. When they first captured it, it was in the hopes that the other Courts won’t have seen it yet – that this was would an easy introduction into the horrors they were about to delve. They had no idea that by the time the meeting occurred all the other Courts would have had brutal strikes against them. They could still use this creature though, for tests on weaknesses and such.

The soldiers that had captured it were also keeping it, and now that group was standing at the doors to the room, a barred cage between them.

All looked on in a mixture of horror and fascination as the soldiers demonstrated things they had learnt about it. Usually, such an important task would be given to a member of the Inner Circle, but Mother knows none of them were capable of such a task considering the state they were in.

They showed oils that made the creature recoil, discussed how starvation and dehydration had affected it, and most interestingly, showed how opal, a seemingly harmless gem, was toxic to the skin.

The demonstration was met with plenty of questions, Cassian himself even asking a few – not as well informed as he would have hoped. He didn’t blame himself. This was not his job and being with his family was his top priority right now.

Cassian was about to voice another query when he saw familiar shadows slinking around the room unbeknownst to everyone there. He was curious as to what his brother was up to, but he wouldn’t interrupt him. Whatever it was, was so predominant that he didn’t announce himself even though he would be invaluable in this discussion.

He watched as Azriel appeared behind Glaslane, who was standing at the back with his entourage in front of him. Azriel stepped out of the darkness to tap Glaslane on the shoulder, silently gesturing him to follow him outside.

Whatever it was, Cassian was sure he’d found out soon.

Glaslane was gone for over a half-hour, but the creature held everyone’s attention so well that they didn’t notice. Cassian would have to have a word with the young fae about that – he needed a more diligent team with him.

When he did come back, it was not with Azriel at his side. He looked slightly troubled and very confused but didn’t speak to any of the fae he’d brought with him, making Cassian question what the issue between him and Az had been.

How very, very curious.

_____

 

“For the sake of play pretend let’s say you are Felix – oh, the upper right corner thanks.”

The man drew an X in the spot Kaden indicated. In return, he drew an O under it. “That seems easy enough.”

“X lower right. Anyway, so if you are Felix, then you are my best bet for advice.”

“Ha! I win.” The man looked triumphantly at his line of Os.

“You went first and got the middle spot, of course you were going to win.”

“You’re just a sore loser. Is the advice you want on naughts and crosses strategies?”

“Maybe, this is the first time I’ve played. But I digress. I have an issue with my better half’s aunt.”

The man scoffed. “By her aunt do you mean my mother? My father told me she can be pretty nasty if the circumstances are right, and she’s likely quite emotional over my death. Do you have cards?”

“No to both. Amren returned to Velaris and thinks I’m an impostor of sorts. She even implied I had something to do with Felix’s death. I have string, we could play Cat’s Cradle.”

“Maybe we should hold off on the games for a second and chat about this Amren problem.”

Kaden nodded, bored out of his mind.

At least he wasn’t angry anymore.

Or tired.

He sat against the wall with his legs straight in front of him, the man in the cell mirroring him, scribbles in the dust from the various games they had played to fill the time.

“She’s not wrong. All this trouble with the creatures started happening after Eleana and I met. Apparently, Eleana’s personality has completely changed since meeting me, which is just lovely to hear. It’s almost validating in a way; I always knew I would be her downfall.”

“What Amren is forgetting is that I knew you well before El- sorry, won’t say it, before she did. Not just that, but we found shit from years ago that looked like creature attacks. That was eons before you even thought about leaving your family. As for her personality, she is definitely a lot more on edge, but one would expect that after what she’s been through. Honestly though, I think she would have been a lot worse if not for you. You kept her grounded. You made her feel safe, feel loved. There’s not a single time in our lives that I can remember her being as happy as when she was with you. Don’t take what Amren said to heart – she’s wrong about you.”

“How do I change her mind?”

“Just keep doing you. She’ll see you the way we all do eventually, Amren is just very protective. We were the first children in her life, and it was like we were one of the many treasures she hoards. When we were with anyone else, they were happy to let people come greet us. If we were with Amren? She would literally snap at them – with her _teeth_.”

“That’s a sweet thought. Little baby Felix and Eleana with their protective aunt.”

“Baby? She did this well into our teens.”

Kaden laughed, a deep happy rumble that hadn’t come from him since the Bloodrite.

“Okay, fake Felix, tell me what Eleana was like as a child then.”

“If you’re wondering if she was always,” he waved his arms around, “so much, then yes. Everything she’s ever done as been over the top and in a manner to get the most attention possible. Like her first big show of magic was when she was one, two? Her and her bloody darkness filled up the whole damn forest. The animals didn’t come back for days! And she just sat there, all cuddled up in Rhys’ arms smiling away. She also _loved_ having her hair done.”

“She still does. I’ve become somewhat of an expert braider because of it.”

“That doesn’t surprise me in the slightest.”

“What else.”

“She was a baby born for the skies. There is no Lay- sorry.”

“You can say her name if you want. It’s a beautiful name.”

“It is. Feyre hated it before she was born.”

“How can that be?” Kaden snickered.

“Rhys just started calling the bump that. He was convinced it was a girl and told everyone her name was Eleana. Do you know how confusing that was for six-year-old me? Feyre would always bite his head off about it, but then Laya was born and it was perfect.”

Kaden smiled. “You’re a good liar, fake Felix.”

“Yes, but not right now.” He smiled wistfully, scuffing his foot in the loose stones and dirt. “Since I’ve been so gracious with my knowledge, can you answer a question for me?”

Kaden pursed his lips. “Why not? But I am just as good a liar as you.”

“Before, when you said you’d lost me and Eleana, what did you mean? Where is she?”

Any laughter Kaden had, any semblance of a good mood was gone at the mention of what happened to her.

“You’re a creature of some sort, I’m sure you already know,” Kaden whispered.

“Humour me then.”

“I’m not in a very humorous mood.”

The fake Felix grunted in return.

“I wish you were real,” his voice was scathing, angry at himself for the confession. “I want so badly to see Felix again.”

Fake Felix’s face fell, and he inched towards the bars, sliding his arm through the gap and tapping Kaden on his shoe. “It’ll be okay, buddy.”

“Felix saved me. Eleana healed me, but it was Felix who saved me.”

Fake Felix brought his arm back, wiping it across his face while sniffling. “Stop being so gushy, you’re going to make me cry.”

_____

 

It was quite the sight to behold – High Lords and Ladies scrambling around a table squabbling about what the best plan of attack was. Every time Cassian thought he might interject he changed his mind. Let the leaders of Prythian wear themselves out first, and then the generals can step in and take the shards of their ideas and turn it into an actual plan. When Cassian heard a suggestion that might be good, like smoking out the mountain, he looked to the other generals to see if they were on the same page. Thesan’s mate often looked to him for confirmation as well, the two clearly thinking the same things. There were also times when the High Leaders, as old and wise as they were, had truly stupid ideas that Cassian had to refrain from laughing at, like sending in specially trained squadrons to try and kill the creatures individually. Was it not clear by now that if they stepped foot in those mountains than they would die?

It was becoming tiresome – they just kept going in circles. No one could agree on what their first step should be, and Cassian found even he didn’t have an answer. They couldn’t find them in the mountains nor anywhere near civilian life – and evacuating everyone to a zone made them no better than sitting ducks. They had nothing that might entice this queen to come to them, and it was still very unclear as to exactly how many creatures she had.

Rhys was growing increasingly weary, and the other High Lords looked no better. Cassian didn’t want to suggest they end for now, but that started to look more and more like a good option.

Thesan noticed as well and asked for everyone in the room to quieten. When they didn’t immediately, he smacked his fist down on the table and growled.

“This is a strange predicament for all of us, but none of you are considering what must be addressed.” He turned to Rhys and Feyre, his expression grim and his voice grave. “The loss of your little girl must cause you immeasurable pain.”

“We’re hopeful she can be saved,” Rhys responded.

“Saved? Rhysand, you can’t be serious.”

All ears were on what Thesan would say next.

“Rhysand, your little girl will be a loss we all feel, but she has to die; you know that.”

“No. I can save her.”

“We have to consider everything here. Don’t speak to me and pretend that there’s someone here who is powerful enough to expel what is inside her. We must continue forward with the assumption that Eleana and this creature are one in the same.”

“Stop saying such things!” Feyre hissed. “Our daughter is seventeen, you can’t consider killing an innocent life-”

“I can if one life spares thousands. This queen has never shown any weaknesses, never lost in battle; she could obliterate us in a heartbeat if she wanted. We have to be tactical here-”

“You’d be killing my child! No, we just need more information. And now that we all know what’s going on we can prepare better. We’ll start mining the opal in the Night Court, manning our soldiers with concoctions made from the oils we now know hurts them. We have time to come up with a solution,” Feyre spat.

“Don’t you see, Feyre? She’s already dead. Her body may live on but there’s nothing left of your daughter inside that thing. If there was, Eleana would have control, she was strong enough to have gotten it back by now. We aren’t killing your child, we’re putting her to peace.”

“No, no, no no no no no no no no.” Feyre pushed away any fae in her way as she stormed to stand in front of Thesan. “You try to touch her and I’ll skin you alive.”

“Losing a child-”

“You know nothing of losing a child,” Cassian stopped him, his voice deep and thick.

“Neither do you,” Thesan scoffed.

“Speaking of children, where is Felix? He’s young but I think his perspective would be quite valuable here,” Helion asked. 

Beside Cassian, Nesta stiffened, her hands gripping the back of his shirt at the words. Amren, who was behind him and observing the organised chaos with her seedy gaze, stepped down and in front of the pair of mates.

It was too late. Nesta already had tears welling in her eyes, and Cassian’s breathing had become ragged.

Helion’s eyes widened in shock, and Thesan put a hand over his mouth, realising how untrue his words were.

Before they could be questioned further, Nesta grabbed Cassian’s hand and dragged him away, whispering that they could no longer be there to Rhys. No one tried to stop them, and they had just made it out the door when Nesta stumbled. Cassian caught her, but she was already shaking from her sobs, her cries undoubtedly being heard from the others. Cassian embraced her tightly and she sobbed into his chest. He winnowed them away, just as he heard Rhys say that no one from the Night Court would be discussing that incident.

_____

 

Kaden hummed under his breath while he watched fake Felix – the male laying on his stomach with his eyes closed. They had stopped speaking at Kaden’s request; he still couldn’t bear to hear his friend’s voice out of a phony’s mouth.

He’d gotten too deep in the illusion for a second there, a mistake that wouldn’t be repeated.

Kaden was roused from his state at the sounds of pounding footsteps coming in his direction. He stood up quickly, knowing that it was likely Azriel coming with a guilty verdict. Kaden got a dagger ready; he would make this man’s death a quick one.

Azriel was frazzled when he appeared and completely ignored Kaden, nearly sliding into the bars in his rush to put the key in the cell’s lock.

Kaden wanted to ask what he was doing, but before he had a chance Azriel had slammed open the door and rushed to the side of the still lying man.

Fake Felix lifted his head, only to have his whole body yanked into a hug.

That’s not what Kaden was expecting.

Fake Felix engulfed Azriel back, both now standing together inside the cell.

“What’s going on?” Kaden asked quietly.

They didn’t answer him – their cries of joy too loud to hear Kaden’s words.

Kaden was confused, unsure of what this meant. Whatever Azriel thought he had confirmed was wrong – there was no way _this_ was his brother. Azriel was just confused, he didn’t see Felix die like Kaden did, didn’t know there was truly no way to come back from that.

Kaden did the unthinkable – he turned and left, leaving Azriel alone with the creature. Wide eyed and stunned, he made his way up the stone stairs. It was only a few minutes before he was feeling the breeze on his body and stepping into the night. He had expected to be blinded by the dwindling son after being in the derelict prison, but he had been down there longer than he’d thought. It was as if he’d expected time to pause for him – to give him a moment of nothingness. But no, he wasn’t that lucky.

He breathed deeply, the smell of salt from the sea refreshing enough to snap him from his daze.

“Kaden.”

He ignored the voice.

“Kaden, stop. It’s me. I swear on the Mother that it’s me.”

He spread his wings, ready to fly away, but screamed when magic snapped them back to his body, chaining him where he was. He thrashed, but no matter what he did, what magic he used to try and counter it, he was still bound – unable to fly.

“Azriel can think what he wants, but I know what you are. Felix would never entrap me.”

“I need you to listen.”

Kaden turned to face him. The man was still in nothing but torn pants. His chest so marred that even Kaden, so accustomed to scars, flinched at the sight.

“I’m sorry I left,” Felix said, wringing his hands in front of him.

“You don’t have to apologize for _dying_.”

“I’m not sorry I died; dare I say I had no control over that one.” He sighed deeply, looking up to the stars. “I said I’m sorry I _left_. Everything just turned to shit, didn’t it? But I’m back now, and we can get this mess sorted the fuck out. Whatever’s happening to Laya, we’ll fix it; we always do.”

Kaden gave him the side-eye. He took one step toward the man, then stopped. He couldn’t let himself hope – not if it meant he would lose Felix again if this was a hoax.

But he wished, Cauldron be damned he wanted it to be Felix, but he just wasn’t sure.

“How about we go to the house and talk some more? Eleana fixed your room up nice and pretty while you were at the Bloodrite. And then maybe we can go say hello to my sisters, I’m sure Quathryn will be thrilled to see you.”

“My room?”

“At our house? How is it that I’m the one who died and yet my memory serves me better. You said you were moving in and I’m holding you to that.”

“We c-can’t.”

“Let me prove to you who I am. I’ll cook for you; I’ll make your favourite, better than anyone can.”

“No. The house is warded, only Felix and his family can enter.”

“ _Please_ ,” the man begged, his eyes shining. “I’ll do anything you want. You can keep me chained in adamant, locked away, but it’s me. I promise on the lives of Quathryn and Thea that I am wholly Felix.”

The man swallowed, looking down.

“I remember every second after I died. I wanted to stay with you; I was so scared of the dark. I think I might always be scared of it now.” His breathing was shaky, so much so that his words were a weak vibrato. “It’s nightfall, and as the world succumbs to the night I fear that I’ll never leave it. You may be Eleana’s light, but you are also mine. Please, don’t leave me in the dark. Don’t leave me. Don’t – don’t leave me.” 

Kaden looked at him, what was left of his heart breaking all over again.

“Felix? Is that truly you?”

He nodded his head.

Kaden rushed to him, engulfing him in a hug so tight Felix was lifted off the ground. He pounded his hand on his back, needing to reassure himself that it was actually Felix who was there. Felix held him back just as tightly, laughing in relief.

“You had me worried; I didn’t think you’d ever believe me.”

“Be quiet, you’re ruining the moment.”

 

_____

 

Kaden, Azriel and Felix winnowed to the meeting. They ran through the halls, coming to a skidding halt outside the doors. Azriel, ever the actual-adult, walked patiently behind them, secure in the knowledge they wouldn’t enter without him.

They expected there to be more noise from inside – maybe yelling, maybe smashing – but it was rather quiet.

“I don’t like the vibe I’m getting from that room,” Azriel said slowly. “Something has happened, but I don’t know what. You two go back to the House of Wind, take the children from Mor and ask her to come here.”

“I have to see my mother and father, they have to know I’m here,” Felix argued. “And I am as blind as to what happened recently as the High Lords are – I need to be in there doing my job.”

“No. Go home.”

“No. I’m staying.”

“That was an order, not a suggestion.”

“Well if we want to get technical theoretically we have the same rank, so you can’t order me around.”

“Rank is regardless because you are a child under my care, therefore I can order you to do what’s best.”

Felix raised his eyebrows. “I certainly hope children don’t behave the way I do.”

Azriel opened his mouth, then shut it. His frown was replaced with a small smile, his whole face brighter than it had been in days. “I’m so, so happy you’re home.”

“Me too, Az.” Felix hugged their uncle.

“If you insist on staying, please go wait in one of the rooms. I’ll send Nesta and Cassian to you.”

“Wait, no, I need you with me in case they think I’m some imposter. Send Kaden in, and then he can debrief us later.”

Azriel nodded. “Good idea. Kaden, get Cassian and Nesta will you? Tell them it’s urgent.”

“Of course.”

Felix and Azriel walked away briskly, Kaden hearing Felix asking if he had told Azriel was Felix said.

“Yes, but let’s not discuss such things now,” his fading voice replied.

Kaden looked after them longingly. His family was slowly coming back together again, and it ignited a hope in him that maybe everything truly would be okay. Felix being back was a gift from the Cauldron that Kaden would forever be indebted for, and now that his brother was here it also felt like the first step in the direction of saving Eleana.

He opened the door, not at all meaning to make it a dramatic entrance, but that didn’t stop every head in the room from turning to look at him.

Some of the faces were familiar, like Glaslane, but Kaden was acutely aware that he knew basically no one in this room full of very formidable fae.

“Who is _he_?” A voice broke the silence.

Kaden looked at the person who had spoken and raised an eyebrow at him. It was a dark-skinned fae with even darker hair. His arm was in a sling, and he was at the centre of a group, clearly a High Lord – which one, he didn’t know. But just looking at him made Kaden want to avert his gaze; it was like he was looking directly at the sun-personified.

“This is Kaden,” High Lord Rhysand answered.

“Where is he from?”

“He’s part of Felix’s Elite.”

“He’s no Illyrian.”

“He is standing right here and can answer for himself.” Kaden stared at the male. Usually he was cowed by such important figures, but right now he just didn’t give a fuck. He would deal with the repercussions of his rudeness later.

“Then who are you, Kaden?”

“It’s not of importance.”

Kaden turned his back on the High Lord, knowing before he did he elicited a smirk from the male.

He walked over to High Lord Rhysand and High Lady Feyre, leaning in so only they could hear his words. “Azriel needs Cassian and Nesta and time is of the essence. Where are they?”

“With Morrigan, I assume. What is the matter?” Feyre questioned.

Kaden hesitated. “This isn’t something you want to hear in a room full of others.”

The two mates shared a look, clearly having a silent conversation between them. Feyre leant forward and pressed a quick kiss to Rhysand’s mouth before standing and addressing the room. “Something needs my attention. I’ll return shortly.”

“He’s in the west wing.”

Feyre left the room, an awkward silence in her wake. Rhysand patted the seat beside him, an invitation for Kaden to sit. He did, wanting to give Felix his privacy when reuniting with his family.

The High Lord who’d spoken to him was still staring at him, his mouth a thin line. He turned to speak to one of his associates, his words too quiet to hear and his gaze never leaving Kaden’s face.

Kaden wondered what it meant but didn’t give it any real thought. He has known his whole life he was an unusual Illyrian, and it certainly wasn’t the first time he’d gotten bizarre looks from strangers.

“As we were discussing before we were interrupted,” Lucien said, “We can’t assume that the death of this queen will mean the end to the creatures. If we first discover how she is making them and halt her that way, we’d have a better chance of saving lives in the long run.”

“You aren’t wrong,” a white haired High Lord agreed. “But her death would also stop their creation and mean there is no one to lead the creatures into war.”

“But what is better?” another dark-skinned fae, this one without a sling, asked. “Creatures systematically attacking us at the command of their leader without being able to be reborn, or, these creatures spreading and unpredictably running amok through Prythian.”

“The end result isn’t what matters the most. The most imperative thing is to stop this queen from creating more creatures,” the one who had been intrigued with Kaden said. “And as much as it pains me to say it, we have to revisit what Thesan said earlier.”

Rhysand shook his head. “I already told you that’s not an option.”

Kaden was confused. It was unlike High Lord Rhysand to be so opposed to an idea if it was viable, and from the looks of the other High Lords, it seemed like earlier this male, Thesan, had suggested something valuable.

“Rhys, can you not see that we have no choice?” Thesan demanded.

“We do have a choice. Let us destroy the way the queen is making them-”

“We have no idea how she is creating them! She could kill thousands more before we even come close to discovering how to stop her process, and that’s even if we can. To me it seems like it comes from her own magic, not some spell or ritual. Rhysand, I’m sorry, but your daughter is already gone. We cannot save her, but we can save our people.”

A terrible feeling made its way into Kaden’s stomach, climbing up his spine and settling in his throat. He didn’t like the tone High Lord Thesan was using, nor what he was suggesting.

“Forgive me, High Lord Thesan, but am I correct in thinking you’re implying we kill Eleana?” Kaden asked.

“Yes.”

Rhysand was stone beside Kaden, not breathing, not blinking.

“You don’t have to be there,” Thesan said gently. “We would never make you witness the death of your daughter-”

“Shut up-”

“and we will make it as quick and painless and we can.”

“Shut your damn mouth, Thesan.” High Lord Rhysand stood, the usual glamour on his powers stripped. His magic flooded the room and the candles lighting the room flickered as Rhysand stormed over to Thesan, usually his magic to easily clear a path to him. All the soldiers in the room, no matter their allegiance, stood to guard, drawing swords in preparation for things to get violent.

“Calm down, Rhysand. You know what must be done,” Thesan growled.

Rhys grabbed him by the shirt and pushed him until he was being slammed into the wall. Thesan didn’t fight back, and Rhysand’s magic meant that no one could approach the two feuding High Lords.

“You will not touch my daughter,” he snarled.

“It has to be done,” Thesan spat back.

“ _I know!”_ Rhysand roared, the candles in the room extinguishing. The room was enveloped by darkness, and Kaden started to feel nervous sweat coating his back. The only sound was High Lord Rhysand’s heavy breathing and the shuffling of feet getting ready to attack and defend.

Thesan stayed silent, his arms up in surrender.

“When my daughter dies it will be at my hands, and my hands only.”

 


	31. Chapter 31

“How can this be?” Feyre was clinging to him so tightly it was a struggle to breathe, but he didn’t mind. Felix loved affection from anyone, but especially his family.

He may be a warrior, a brute in some people’s eyes, and although now he had the scars to match he was still the quite soft. His softness and his fierceness complemented each other well, and Felix hoped his sisters would grow to be the same – protective of themselves, but still open to love in its many forms.

“It’s a miracle,” Azriel said.

“Truly.” She stepped back, laying a hand on his cheek. “And I know it’s you – your mind is wholly yours and exactly as it has always been.”

“Where are my parents? My sisters?”

“They’ve returned to Velaris. I’ll summon them to the House of Wind now-”

“No, no. Just ask them to go to our family home. Please.”

Feyre nodded, her eyes crinkling from joy and her smile wide. “I’ll make sure you can get inside. I’m just so shocked, and happy, and when we get Eleana back she’s going to be thrilled. She’s missed you so much.”

After another hug, Feyre winnowed them all to Felix’s childhood home. Felix would have done it himself, but since waking from the Other Side he didn’t completely trust his magic. So far, it felt and moved with him the way it had before, but how could he know how his death would affect it?

When Azriel put his hand on his shoulder as they walked up the garden path, he sighed in relief. He needed the comfort.

The first night, when he had awoken in darkness, he had screamed himself hoarse. It had taken all his strength to crawl towards a source of light, and all it had been was docks in the distance. He wasn’t near Velaris, he had no idea where he was, and as he felt the blackness consuming him he quivered and cried.

Not his finest moment.

He had yet to shake the feeling that came over him every time he was somewhere enclosed or dark. That cell had been a nightmare, and it was Kaden’s presence that soothed him enough to be coherent. If Azriel had left him down there much longer on his own, he might’ve become so feral he put the creatures to shame. He still willingly let Az put him there though, he needed to seem trusting, needed to convince his family he was who he said.

If the roles had been reversed, Felix would have killed himself on site rather than risking the safety of his family any longer.

Speaking of his family, he needed more details on his cousin and to what exactly her predicament was. He would happily blaze himself into an inferno of nothing once more if it meant saving her.

They entered the house and Felix quickly rushed upstairs to get a change of clothes. He would scare his poor mother to death if she saw him in this state.

When he came downstairs again – he also decided to quickly bathe, the smell on him would make even the creatures cringe – he heard the voices of his parents in the lounge.

Their words weren’t distinguishable, but Nesta seemed to be a bit hysterical, her tone high and scratchy in a way he’d never heard it. His father’s voice was low, and he often skipped a breath.

They had their backs to him as he entered the room, and the slight creak of the floorboards as he walked was what made them turn. Felix didn’t know what Azriel and Feyre had told them, but their reactions made him think absolutely nothing.

They both stilled, their bodies as rigid as statues.

His mother was the first to move, her mouth opened and closed as she looked at him, and she shook her head in disbelief. She took one tentative step forward, and then leant back into Cassian. Her eyes were flitting up and down him, taking in every inch of his alive body. She half-stretched out her hand, her bruised fingers shaking like a fallen leaf in the wind. It was the opposite of his father, who’s only movements were that of his hands as he held Nesta by the waist, keeping the woman afloat.

They stared at one another – Felix not daring to utter a word or make a move toward them.

Felix believed they may have stood there for hours just looking at each other if it had not been for his sister trapesing around the room absentmindedly, skipping to her heart’s desire. She hadn’t noticed him, not yet.

The first thought that entered his head at the sight of her was that it was far past her bedtime.

The sudden silence in the room prodded her to approach her parents, and when she saw Felix standing there – tall and strong and secure as he had ever been – a smile as bright as the sun in the Summer Court spread across her face.

“Lis!” she gasped, her tiny legs working to run as fast towards him as she could.

The breath was knocked out of him from her words. He knelt to meet her, arms wide open, letting her crash into him. He lifted her, giving her a kiss on both her cheeks as she asked where he had been. He apologized profusely, and as he said to her, “I had to leave for a bit, but I’m back now, and I’m here to stay,” he looked over her head and into the eyes of his mother and father.

She accepted his apology and started chattering away, telling her all about the things she had done and seen while he’d been gone. He was half-listening, and although he felt guilt at that he was too distracted by his unmoving parents.

He’d thought… He’d thought that they would be happy to see him, that they would be grieving him.

But from the looks of them he wasn’t sure they wanted him back.

“Feyre would you mind taking Quathryn and Thea upstairs, please?” Cassian asked. Feyre nodded, taking Quathryn from Felix’s arms much to the disdain of both siblings. Azriel followed behind her with the baby, and then they were alone.

His mother’s whole body was heaving with the effort it took her to breath, and the three steps it took for her to stand in front felt like a mile and looked like it took every ounce of energy still in her.

Her face, so cold, crumpled as a sob wrecked through her. “My baby boy,” she cried as she crushed her arms around his neck, holding him so tight it was like she was trying to forge him to her.

He slumped in relief, hugging her back just as tightly. He didn’t care how old he was, he needed a hug from his mother.

“I was worried you wouldn’t ever move,” Felix laughed quietly.

“All hope I’d had was torn away from me. My lovely, tiny child, you’re home now. You’re home.” She kept muttering _you’re home_ to him, all the while his father staring at the two.

Felix looked away from her, staring down his father. Felix didn’t speak – waiting for him to. Felix felt like he had done enough talking today, enough explaining, and right now he just needed the support of the people who were always supposed to provide it.

“You’re here?” Cassian said.

“Yes,” Felix whispered in return.

“There are so many things that I wanted to say to you – needed to. Assurances, about how much I love you my son, and how essential you are to this family, essential to _me,_ of how incredibly proud I am of you. I hated myself for not telling you more often, for letting you think that you were alone or that I didn’t love you more than anything else. You are one of the four greatest things ever brought into this world, and I feel honoured to be your father. Shocked, even, that I sired someone so fantastic. There are so many things I needed to say to you, but for the life of me I can barely think of anything.”

Felix’s eyes burned at the words – ones his father may have needed to say, and ones he may have needed to hear.

Cassian approached them, wrapping his arms around both Felix and Nesta, the three silently but very happily crying.

 

_____

 

“Rhys?”

“Yes, Feyre darling?”

“Would you really do it?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll be by your side, and hers, when it has to be done.”

 

_____

 

“You came back from the dead and yet you still feel the need to bake us snacks?” Kaden was seated on the table, watching Felix as he prepared food for the family. He would help, but right now was also a thinking time for Felix, and Kaden trying to help would have just been a nuisance – not that Felix would ever say that.

Felix scoffed. “I can’t, nay, I _refuse_ to have an official meeting unless there are at least three edible treats in the room.”

Kaden had caught his brother up on the things that had transpired since his death, an unusual concept indeed, and now Felix was stewing as he tried to understand everything that had happened. It had taken all night – even Nesta and Cassian had finally slept after the promises that Felix would stay in the house and be there when they awoke – and now that the sun had risen they were once again gathering to plan.

“Felix,” Kaden said quietly, “do you really think High Lord Rhysand will kill Eleana? I don’t think I could stop him if he tried. I don’t think anyone could.”

Felix finished scooping the cake mixture into its tin. He handed Kaden the spoon and mixing bowl, a little bit of raw batter left for Kaden to eat.

“I’ve thought this one over.” He placed the cake in the oven, moving onto his next project. “I do think he’d kill her.”

Kaden gaped at his fears being confirmed.

“But not like that.” Felix flicked him on the nose to change his expression. “I know Rhys, he’s like a second father to me, and when he says that he’ll kill her he means if there’s literally no other solution. If there’s no way to save her.”

“We have to think of a way.”

“Already have, your faith in me is so little nowadays. Anyway-”

“Not anyway, go back to the solution!”

“All in due time. As I was saying before you rudely interrupted, I think the reason Rhys would want it to be him is not because he wants her dead, not in any way shape or form, but because if she does have to go, which she won’t, it should be at the hands of someone she loves. It’s a scary thing, to be faced with death, but it’s easier if you have a loving figure at your side holding your hand, making you feel safe. I think Rhys wants to be that for her. Like how you were for me.”

“But we didn’t have a choice.”

“In a way Eleana doesn’t either. If you were where she was, and you had no control and were killing people by the thousands, what would you want?”

Kaden mulled over his words, his sombre mood at complete odds with the warm, welcoming scents of the kitchen.

He stayed with Felix while he baked, people coming in and out to see him as he whisked around the kitchen. His reunion with Mor was an especially teary one, and she clutched both Felix and Kaden to her as she wept tears of joy. It was a funny sight, the slight fae wedged between two massive Illyrians as she referred to them as boys – as Little Ones.

Quathryn came in too, still in her pyjamas and bleary eyed, and snuggled with Kaden while they watched Felix. It was good, as it meant they both got to be his taste testers for the morning.

When Amren entered the room to see her nephew, Kaden left.

It seemed their meetings had relocated from the House of Wind to the Nesta and Cassian’s home for the time being, and everyone gathered in the lounge room, chairs being pulled from bedrooms and studies to fit everyone.

The only people not seated were Cassian and Felix. The General had come to a realisation as he watched Felix holding Theodosia that Felix had never seen her swim – whatever the hell that meant.

So now the two near-identical males were sprawled on their stomachs in front of the baby, and as she lifted her arms and head off the floor Cassian went, “Swim swim swim swim swim swim swim,” and mimicked her movements, making her smile and lift her arms and legs up just like if she was swimming.

It was hands down one of the sweetest things Kaden had ever seen. Without thinking about it, he sent it to Eleana down the daemati bond she had so long ago established between them with a message that she just had to see this.

He was met with the same impenetrable wall he’d gotten every time he’d tried to contact her.

No one noticed when after that, Kaden got up and politely excused himself. He walked to the bathroom, locking the door behind him. He all but glanced in the mirror before he was throwing up in the basin.

_____

 

Felix read over the court reports as the room watched him. He wasn’t studying the way they attacked or analysing battle patterns, no, he was pouring over any and every description of Eleana.

He hummed and ahhed to himself, finally handing the papers to Kaden.

“Just as I thought,” he told his family.

“Do you care to elaborate?” Kaden was still waiting on the solution Felix claimed to have to have.

“I think we’re right in assuming that no daemati will be able to overpower this queen, but I don’t think we need one. Eleana is definitely still in there, and I think we have a way of bringing her back while also destroying the thing inside her.”

“How can you be sure she’s still in there?” Nesta asked, hanging onto every word her son said. “I have all faith that there’s a way to bring her back, but I would like to hear what makes you believe, having not seen her yourself, that she’s still in there.”

“Because it wanted Eleana for her magic, correct? But Eleana’s magic isn’t connected to her body, it’s connected to her soul. It _is_ her, a part of her so intrinsic you could no less cut it out then cut out her heart. She’s in there alright, she’s just not in control.”

“But what do we do? If you think no daemati can help, an opinion I’ve heard a lot lately, then what can we do for her?” Morrigan asked.

“The answer is simple, we need to separate Eleana’s soul from the queen, expel the creature from her body, and then kill it.”

“It’s a good idea, but there is nothing simple about it. Tearing two souls from one another… how could that possibly be done?”

“Magic, of course. A magic user whose innate ability has always been the manipulation of souls. Whether it be finding them, reading them…” Felix turned his head and peered at Kaden.

The whole room followed his gaze, and soon every person in it had their eyes glued to the blonde male. They all looked between him and Felix in confused, including Kaden himself. He was the one Felix was implying could save Eleana, and yet he had no idea what thought was actually running through his best friend’s mind.

“Felix… that’s not something I can do. Seeing the Other Side, tracking people, it’s not at all like what you’re suggesting. I can’t just – just move souls around.”

“Yes, you can. I know it for a fact.” Felix stood and walked over to his father who had Thea in his lap. Felix picked the baby out of his arms, kissing her on the nose and holding her gently against him. “I know you can do it, because it’s what you did for Theodosia. You saved my sister’s life, and now you’ll save Eleana’s.”

Feyre gasped, standing and making her way next to Felix, looking down at the sitting Kaden. Her feet, once dragging along the carpet, had a hopeful skip in them, and the way she loomed over Kaden with her hands in fists in front of her made him lean back as much as he could.

“You can do this,” she said.

“No, I can’t,” Kaden sputtered. “What I did for Thea is completely different-”

“No, it’s not! Don’t you see? You saw her soul leaving to the other side, and you put it back in her body. You brought her back to life. What was the prophecy that Elain had been spouting all day? _Gold will meld the soul to the body_ , or something like that. And remember what she had spat at you in those gardens? _You are a veilsinger, and if you can separate the soul then you can also put it back._ Elain isn’t an all-knowing force, and the majority of the time she doesn’t even know what she’s saying means, but damn it Kaden can’t you see?”

“No, I _can’t_. You’re right, I did bring Thea back and it was the most amazing thing my magic has ever done, but that doesn’t mean I can just go around tearing souls from their bodies!”

“Remember what she said though! If you can separate the soul, you can put it back! This thing always wanted Eleana, and the only person who will ever be able to save her is a veilsinger. And you, Kaden, are the only living veilsinger.”

“That could just be referring to the fact that I am very much capable of inflicting death, and that’s the only way I’ve seen souls detached. I don’t see them when people are still alive.” Kaden stood, pleading with his friend, overwhelmed by what he was suggesting.

“But you do. Every time you use your magic, you track their souls. You _see_ their souls.”

The two half-Illyrians stood facing each other, Kaden shaking with an emotion he couldn’t name and Felix breathing heavily.

At a stalemate, Felix stepped forward. Surprisingly, he put Thea into Kaden’s arms, patting both of their heads.

The room was silent, everyone processing what Felix had suggested in their own ways. High Lord Rhysand had come behind Feyre, his hands resting on her waist, a small smile on his face as he came to see the truth in his nephew’s words. Cassian and Nesta were holding hands, their pride for their clever son clear on both of them. Amren stood in the corner, surly as always, but looking at Kaden not with apprehension, but maybe with a little appreciation.  Not for who he was, but for what he might be able to do. Azriel was sitting in an armchair with his ankle crossed over his knee, drumming his fingers in thought while his shadows, lighter than they had been in days, swirled and smoked around him. And Mor was stepping back and forth nearly imperceptibly, wanting to approach the two but letting them come to their own conclusions.

While no one was paying attention, Quathryn was having cake by the fist full, shovelling it into her mouth without a care.

“This isn’t something I can practise,” Kaden said, breathless. “If I get it wrong, it could kill her.”

Felix shook his head. “You can’t kill Eleana, not even if you tried.”

“What you’re suggesting could work, Felix,” Rhysand said. “And you’re right, Kaden couldn’t hurt her.”

“And the best part?” Felix spoke to the room, but he looked at Kaden, a knowing glint in his eyes. “She’s still in there, meaning she can’t hurt you either. You are the only one of us who that is true for. You can get to her, and you can bring her back to us.”

Kaden looked at the baby in his arms. She was old enough now that she could lift her head and look back, and she gave him the loveliest little toothless smile. Her arms flailed a bit, and as she knocked her hands against his chest Kaden knew that Felix’s idea might be the one to rescue Prythian from the clutches of a power-hungry beast.

There was one issue though.

“As much as I want this to work, I still can’t get close to her. Her defences, mental and physical, could be enough that I can’t get anywhere near Eleana’s body or soul. How would I confront her?”

Felix smirked devilishly. “Oh, my dear friend.” He clapped and rubbed his hands together. “Have you told me, word by word, exactly what the queen has said to you, done to you etcetera?”

“Yes…”

“Then you don’t need to worry about not being able to get close to her. I know females pretty well, and that one wants a piece of your hot bastard ass.”  

Kaden rolled his eyes, and Cassian snorted so hard from the couch that he had to smother his subsequent laughs with his hands.

“Felix, you know I love your jokes but now isn’t the time for them-”

“He’s so right holy shit,” Cassian bellowed from the couch, slapping his knee and bending over as he snickered loudly.

He was still laughing when he got up and sauntered over to them, plucking Thea away from him and putting an arm around his shoulder. “Why else would this queen talk only to him? And we all know how suggestive she’s been.” Cassian smirked. “And now that she’s in the body of an Acheron woman? You’re basically irresistible.”

“What’s _that_ supposed to mean?” Nesta balked.

“There’s something about all this,” Cassian pointed up and down Kaden’s body, “that makes you Archerons fall every Cauldron damned time.”

“That is not true,” Feyre scoffed.

“You don’t count, he’s your daughter’s – uh, thing. You haven’t known him outside the realm of Eleana. But Quathryn? He’s her best friend. Thea? I mean, just look at her.”

They all gathered curiously around the baby who was, quite bizarrely, staring at Kaden dreamily.

“Huh,” Feyre said.

“And Elain once told me that she thinks he’s one of the most attractive men she’s ever seen,” Cassian added.

“Bullshit,” Rhys said while smirking.

“I can confirm that one is true,” Azriel said quietly.

“And Nesta. Oh Mother, when she was pregnant? She-”

“Stop,” Nesta cut in, her mouth a thin line.

“And well we don’t need to talk about the effect he’s had on Eleana. If I did Rhys’ head might explode.”

“In summary, I’m a genius and this family could never function properly without me,” Felix finished. “Oh, and saving Eleana is entirely possible. All we need to do is find her.”  

“This could go terribly wrong,” Kaden told him.

“Things have already gone terribly wrong, may as well roll with it."


	32. Chapter 32

“Shh, you have to be quiet,” Kaden laughed as he kissed Eleana, the woman enveloped in his arms as he walked them to his room.

“You won’t be saying that in five minutes.” She pushed him against the wall in the hallway, kissing him fiercely as she undid the buttons to his shirt, running her hands up and down his chiselled chest as she did.

His breath hitched as her hands wandered further, but he was still conscious of waking the others in the house. He bent down, picking her up like she was his bride and carrying her to his room. He slammed his door behind him, noise suddenly not an issue when Eleana was whispering such filthy things in his ear. He threw her onto the bed, stripping off the rest of his clothes before he joined her.

He was on top of her, her legs around his waist as he gently grinded into her, teasing her. Her moans were ethereal, and the feel of her warm body under him had him melting into her. He worked his tongue and teeth over her jaw, then her collar bones, and then pulled down her strapless dress so that her breasts were exposed to him.

Before he could completely undo her, she flipped them. Her undergarments had long been discarded, and her dress was of no interference when she lowered herself onto him with a groan. Kaden’s breathing nearly stopped in surprise and pleasure, and as she moved her hips perfectly against him he threw his head back, moaning her name.

Still riding him, she bent down and pressed her teeth, her lovely fae fangs, against his neck. Anticipating the bite, his heart started to race, and his hands squeezed her hips hard.

She kissed his jugular first, and then delicately bit him. Pulling back, Kaden drowned in her golden eyes.

Wait, no.

He tried to get away, but the strength of the queen and the darkness that didn’t belong to her pinned him down. No matter how he screamed, there was nothing he could do as she snarled and tore into his flesh again, devouring him alive.

____

Kaden was startled awake by Felix pinching him hard enough to make Kaden cry out in pain. He hissed as he rubbed at the hurt and glared confusedly at his best friend.

“What the _fuck_.”

“I tried calling your name and it didn’t work. Time to get up sunshine, we have work to do.”

Kaden sat up with a groan, and sluggishly walked to his window to peer out the glass. The sun was high – it was the afternoon – and he turned away from the bright light as his eyes burned.

It has been four days since Felix’s return. Four days of the pair staying awake at night and pouring over any and every text that might pertain to helping Eleana, four days of Felix staying close to the candles and avoiding the encroaching darkness at all costs. Four days of Kaden staying at his side, awake when he was and asleep when he wasn’t, and that had led to times such as now.

Kaden quickly washed, trying to be only slightly more presentable than usual.

“Now, Kaden, I must warn you,” Felix’s voice was grave as he appeared behind Kaden, but the withheld smirk on his face gave away his true intentions. “High Lord Helion is one of the most attractive men in Prythian, but he isn’t interested in us younglings. I would know, I’ve tried many a time.”

“Maybe he’s just not interested in you.”

“Not possible.”

Kaden huffed a laugh and pushed past Felix to gather the few texts he had on veilsingers, shoving them into a bag. “Is Mor ready yet?”

“Has been for hours. We’ll leave for the Day Court when you’re prepared.”

“Then let’s leave now.” Kaden swung the bag over his shoulder and followed Felix out of his room and downstairs. Mor was waiting in the hallway, undoubtedly having heard them talking. Kaden noticed, very quickly, that any magic designed to sound proof does not work with the doors open.

He greeted Mor with a kiss to the cheek, and she looked delighted at his appearance. He was wearing one of the suits she had bought for him and left for him in his closet. It wasn’t as decorative as the one Felix bought him all those months ago for his cousin’s wedding, but the deep blue, fitted fabric was still fine enough for a lord. He wanted to look nice – trick the High Lord of the Day Court into thinking he was something he wasn’t. Respectable.

Mor grabbed Felix and Kaden’s by the arm and winnowed them away.

Kaden had to close his eyes the moment they landed. The sun was blinding, not a single cloud to interrupt the beams, and Felix quickly walked them both under the shade of a large balcony.

Kaden was awed by the palace in front of him. Tall, white marble beams gashed with green and gold greeted him. The palace just rose higher and higher, and spatted along were mirrors reflecting the crystalline blue of the sky. Mor and Felix didn’t take note of the place. It was sometimes hard for Kaden to remember that places such as these were the norm for them. Even if he wasn’t a bastard, Kaden never would have seen such structures in Illyria.

What was more notable though, was the debris around him that was still being cleared from the queen’s attack. The chunks that were missing from the buildings, and the heavy feeling from the sentries around him that spoke legions of the people now missing from their forces.

Helion was tall in front of them. The High Lord’s arm was still in a sling, but it didn’t affect him as he stood imposingly.

“Come this way.” No welcome, but Kaden didn’t expect one, nor did he expect the strange glances Helion kept shooting his way.

They followed him through his home and to his personal library. He started talking on the way.

“Of the five recorded veilsingers in written history, three have been from this court, and the other two hailed from ancestors who did. We’ve never been able to find a tangible reason as to why, but with magic such as this no origin is ever found.” He peered at Kaden. “You’re an abnormality, it seems. Everything we have, whole books just on those five persons, three females and two males, is in my personal collection. You think a shadowsinger is coveted? Some of the things these fae could do will blow your mind, and make you understand why they’ve always been hunted by whatever ruler or daemati knew of their existence. You were smart, boy, allying yourself with the Night Court. You may fair easier than those who have come before you.”

Kaden smiled slightly at the thought – to even think that he had this life for any reason other than Felix and Eleana was laughable. Felix, contrary to Kaden, looked bothered by the High Lord’s words, as if he might interject that Kaden’s life had been hard enough already, and that Felix had no plans to let anyone hurt him again.

They reached the doors to the library, and Helion stopped with his hands on the door knobs and turned to them. “We also have a fae named Den who said she would talk to you. I will warn you though, she has had trauma in her life that makes her… difficult to understand, and to get answers from. I suggest two of you speak to her – I recommend you Mor, she might like the presence of another woman – and one of you go through the texts.”

“Den… isn’t that your famed historian? I thought she went missing decades ago,” Mor said slowly.

“She’s back now,” was Helion’s explanation.

Mor didn’t question him further, just looked at Kaden and Felix. “Felix, you come with me to speak to Den. Kaden, you’ll recognize more about the veilsingers than we can.” She reached out and squeezed his hand. “You come find me if you need me, okay honey?” She patted him on the cheek.

Helion quickly guided Kaden into the study, directly to the pile of books he’d accumulated since High Lord Rhysand had requested some of his Inner Circle come to do research.

Because soon, so soon, Kaden would have to try and draw the queen out, and he would have to know as much as possible about his magic before he could.

_____

“This Den, she is not only a historian, but also your personal seer,” Mor mused. She wasn’t curious as to why he had omitted that fact in his description of her, but she needed a subtle way to warn Felix of what was to come.

Den. A fae she had heard of but never had met. The most powerful seer ever recorded, she had vanished without warning.

“Her being a seer is irrelevant. She no longer gives prophesies,” Helion replied.

“Why not?” Felix asked.

Helion sighed deeply through his nose. “You’ll see soon enough.”

He led them through the palace, taking them higher and higher until they were climbing the spiral staircase of a giant turret – quarters fit for the finest noblewoman. Helion had done her well. Mor skimmed her hand against the smooth rock as they went up, needing the coolness to centre her. Eventually, they stopped at a red, thick door. Helion knocked four times, and then opened it just a smidge.

“Den?” he called.

“Helion, lovely, do come in. You’ve brought me guests?”

Her voice was what flowers in bloom would sound like it they could talk. It was whispy but sure, lighter than a petal falling in the wind. It was beautiful.

The door opened, and Mor saw that the beauty of that voice was probably once reflected in the woman before her.

Her skin was a shadow of tan and grey, and the bones in her hands and face cut her they were so jagged. She was the thinnest person Mor had ever seen, thinner than Feyre even, after Rhys first brought her to the Night Court. Her hair was the brightest thing, even with decorations of all the colours of the rainbow lining her walls. It was the colour of spun gold. Her eyes, the darkest black she had ever seen, we sunken and marred with bags beneath them. There was no balcony, but there were wide windows that let her overlook the court. She was sitting on an arm chair with a blanket thrown over her, her hands resting in her lap.

Mor looked at the woman and felt like she knew her.

“Den, this is Lady Morrigan and Lord Felix of the Night Court. They are the people that wished to speak to you about veilsingers, and about a creature in Prythian and some symbols we’ve been seeing. Do you remember?”

“Yes, lovely Helion, God of the sun and all the burns bright in the day. I remember.”

Felix stepped forward and bowed to the lady. “It is nice to meet your acquaintance.”

She stared at Felix, and the small smile she had given Helion turned to a beam brighter than her hair. “A baby with wings!” she proclaimed. “How was it, the first time you flew? Your mother was scared to death, but you never went far. And then your warrior father would fly with you, and all was well. Do you sing in the sky?”

Felix foundered. “Pardon?”

“Did it scare you when your little sister didn’t have wings? When you learnt that she would never know the taste of wind?”

Felix looked at her curiously. “You can see the past?”

“I can see everything.”

Helion cleared his throat. “Den has the ability to see the future, past, and present, in all realms.”

“So, even all the way across the continent?”

Helion’s face turned dark. “Much, much further than that.”

Mor stepped towards the woman and sunk to her knees in front of her. “We beg for your aide, Den. My niece is in grave danger, and your knowledge might save her life and many others. Can you help us?”

Den opened her mouth in shock, her hands moving to Mor’s cheeks. “Why of course! I would do anything for a friend.”

A friend. Mor accepted the term and put her hands over Den’s, so she could gently remove them from her face. She did not let go, though, and instead clasped them tightly. “Felix, would you be kind enough to show Den the sketches of the symbols?”

“Of course.” He walked over and presented one of Glaslane’s sketchbooks to her.

She started flipping through the pages, making noises of surprise and concern as she did. All the while, Helion leant against the closed door and Felix stood over them. Mor stayed crouched beside her.

“This creature, she has kidnapped your niece?”

“Can’t you already tell?” Felix raised a brow.

In response, she giggled lightly. “Oh no, sweetest boy. I rarely choose what I see. Once upon a time, I used up all the stardust that was inside my blood to see the future of my favourite boy, so that I might live his life with him. I can no longer choose.”

Felix didn’t have a response to that.

“The creature has taken my nieces mind and body from her, so that she might use her magic,” Mor said after a long pause. The whole time, the delirious smile never left Den’s face.

“She took your niece for her magic?”

“Yes.”

“Then she is no queen.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Because if she was a queen she would not need another’s magic. She might a princess, but never someone who could take a throne in her own land.”

“Her own land?”

“These are not symbols in the way you suggest, rather a written language that can be used in any world. I have seen things that would baffle you, that you would likely deny. It is not the first time a creature, a creature I suspect I may know what is, has used the magic in this language to break through the unseen barriers that separate our world from others.”

Den’s tone had completely changed, her face had become contemplative. It was if she went from being delirious to being a lecturer. It was as if stepping into her old role, as a teacher, as a wise woman, brought her closer to reality than what she normally was.

“The good news is they can be defeated and expelled. It’s difficult, and usually ends in death for both parties, but the life of your niece isn’t necessarily forfeit. You would need someone with a certain type of fire, there’s never been one recorded in this land though. Other than that…” Her eyes lit up. “A veilsinger.” Her face fell. “But the last living veilsinger died over 600 years ago.”

“What is this creature?” Felix finally asked a question. His voice was thick, but his shoulders are more relaxed than they had been in days.

Mor wondered if this whole time he had been guessing that Kaden could help Eleana. If a large part of him was just putting on a front so his family could be held together just a little longer.

“The word isn’t one I can say in this language. I can write it though, write everything I know down. “

“That would be of great help. I – I would be forever thankful,” Mor said sincerely.

With the topic coming to a conclusion, the far-away look started to return to Den’s face. She turned her head to Felix.

“I wanted to watch him as a cloud. I assume you’re here to bring him back to me.”

Mor looked at Den in confusion, and Helion stepped forward, as if to drag Felix and herself from the room.

“Bring who?” Felix asked.

Den looked down at her hands, still entwined with Mor’s and snatched them back. She jolted out of her chair and scampered to the edge of the room, where she slammed open a desk drawer and pulled out a long knife.

Mor was immediately on her feet, and Felix drew a sword she didn’t even realise he had. Helion raised his hand and called her name, trying to calm her.

“Who are you?” she shrieked at Felix.

“Den, that is Lord Felix of the Night Court, remember?”

“No. No he is not! He is here to take him away from me. He wants to take my baby away from me! No, _no no no no no no no_ I won’t let him!”

“Woah, hold on there Den. No one’s here for that. You’re in the Day Court. You live here. This is your room. You know it is, that’s how you knew where to stash your knife,” Helion said slowly and delicately.

Her eyes, the colour of aged charcoal, raced between Felix and Helion. Mor stepped towards Helion, ready to demand an explanation but not in front of this female.

Triggered by Mor’s movements, the woman looked at her, and one again, her whole demeanour changed. Mor had seen four versions of this woman in an hour, and this seemed like a new one.

“Oh.” Den had tears in her eyes, but her smile had returned. She dropped the knife to the floor and wiped her hands on her green dress. “You’ve returned to me.”

Mor looked behind her, not sure who Den was talking too. When she glanced back, Mor flinched with the intensity of Den’s gaze on her.

“I knew you would come back. I knew you heard me call to you. The dust told me so as it wiggled into my ears.”

“I’ve been here the whole time, with you.”

“I mean before.” She rang her hands. “In my cell, with the other Forgotten lives. I called to you, I told you. I remember the exact words. _My baby. I can’t find my child.”_

The boy she kept referring to was her child – her baby? – and Mor didn’t think it was a coincidence that Den had used the word Forgotten.

As in the Forgotten of Hewn City, where prisoners were left to rot for their crimes. The Forgotten, who she had passed while looking for Kaden’s mother, disregarding the things the prisoners said to her as she did. Is it possible that this woman was one of those people? She certainly looked the part, and she had seen many break at the harsh conditions and act in such a jarring manner.

“You were – were you in Hewn City?” Mor breathed.

“Mor, outside, now,” Helion interjected before anyone could say a word.

He practically dragged Mor out by her arm and down the stairs, enough so that they were out of hearing distance.

“Helion, who the _fuck_ is she? Tell me that woman hasn’t been rotting in Hewn City this whole time.”

“Mor.” He could barely meet her eyes, and he slumped against the wall and slip down, putting his head in his hand. “We looked for her for years. She is invaluable to this court. Or she was. Until we found her in Hewn City. She’s been like that ever since. Sporadic, dangerous, it’s why she has this turret to herself.”

“How did you find her?”

“By complete accident. There’s a young boy, he’s only seven, that was born with the ability to see where people are by touching different objects. He can’t pinpoint a location, only see what they see. If a person’s dead, he sees where their body is, if they’re alive, he can give a completely accurate description of where they are. He found some textbooks that Den had written, her personal first editions, and started babbling on about what he was seeing. It was concerning to the librarian, and after a chain of fae it eventually came to me. The only place I could think of that matched what he was saying was your prisons in Hewn City. I didn’t bother asking for permission, knowing it was better to instead seek forgiveness if I was caught.”

The images of the prison in Hewn City flashed in her mind, and Mor felt sick. What could Den have done to end up there? That dank, lifeless place meant for those who were criminally insane but not dangerous enough for their other prisons.

“And her baby?”

“A healer came in. She says there are signs that Den may have had a child, but it would have been decades ago. He wouldn’t be the infant she keeps referring to. She wasn’t pregnant when she disappeared, so he could be anything from fifteen to thirty years old. If he even exists.”

“If an illegitimate baby of another court was born in Hewn City, it was likely left to the wolves to die.” Mor joined him on the steps, deflated. “You knew, when I came here, you knew I would eventually recognize her. Her voice… I can’t forget that voice. Why would you do this? Why would you put this on me after everything my family has been through?”

“Once, she was one of the most revered fae in Prythian. And now look at her. She was in the dark for so long, and I don’t know whether it’s that or the shock of the sun that has made her this way. Her skin burns and peels. She incessantly insists we find her baby. She’s been back for a few months, and she has shown no sign of progress.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Isn’t it obvious, Mor?”

Before she could reply, they were abruptly interrupted by a panting sentry, weapons drawn and sweat coating him.

_____

 

Felix watched Mor and Helion leave. He awkwardly tapped his foot and tilted his lips upward in an imitation of a smile while whisking his sword back to the in-between pocket of this world.

“Have you seen him? I could’ve sworn you brought him with you.”

Felix gulped, and subtly backed away from her. It’s not that he was scared, but…

There was still something scary about her – about someone so unhinged.

“How old are you?” he asked. He had heard of her and read her books in class when he was a child, but knowing her teachings and her as a person were two different things.

“I stopped counting after two thousand.”

He raised his eyebrows. “When did you stop counting?”

“Before the war.”

“With the King of Hybern?”

“The one before that.”

“The slave wars with Amarantha and Miryam?”

“No, before that one too.” She paused, her smile so gentle it was shocking. Felix hadn’t seen a look so pure many times.

On Eleana, when she was Quathryn’s age, on Quathryn, who had yet to learn the hardships of the world.

It was the look of innocent hope, and Felix didn’t understand how this woman had it.

“Did you bring my son with you?”

“No, ma’am, I did not.”

“Are you sure? He’s small, but strong. His hair is lovely and fluffy and looks like the sand at the beach on a bright day. He’s like an itty-bitty sun.”

Felix could smell her from where he was standing. She smelt like paper, the kind you find in ancient books, and, somehow, she smelt like the wind.

“They took him from me, but you brought him here,” she insisted again.

Felix walked to her and handed her the book she had discarded when she had forgotten who Felix and Mor were. He reminded her, as kindly as he could, that she said she would write down everything she knew about the creatures, what that could mean for Eleana, and the veilsingers.

In an instant, she changed again, and Felix was struggling to keep up with the gaunt woman’s moods.

She started methodically documenting everything she knew for him, occasionally speaking her thoughts aloud, in an authoritative, clear voice.

When she was finished, Felix was impressed by how quick she was, she started floating away again.

Felix couldn’t stand the silence.

“Den is an unusual name,” he said.

“It’s one of many I have.” She started moving around the room, tiding things that were already perfectly straight. She picked up her knife and hid it in the pockets of her skirts. She remade her bed.

“What other names do you have?”

“Annaliese is my middle name. My father was from the Winter Court and wanted to make sure I had something to tie me there even if I lived my whole life here. Sometimes I lie and say it’s my first name. Den is also a shortening.”  

Felix was about to ask more, when Helion and Mor burst into the room, both red faced and fuming.

Felix was immediately alert, summoning his sword back as well as a battle axe – he was just as good with both arms, let them both hold deadly weapons.

“What?” he demanded.

“The queen has marched on the mortal realms. Humans are being slaughtered as we speak by the thousands. We don’t have any more time to plan – it’s now or never, and we just have to pray to the Cauldron Kaden can do it. Do you remember the plan in its entirety?” Mor spoke succinctly.

Felix nodded, knowing every inch of the plan the Inner Circle had made two days before to hopefully save Eleana. But it was a draft, and it needed refinement.

It would have to do.

“Kaden’s already in the Night Court preparing to leave – I’ve winnowed him there, and we’ll go straight to the Spring Court, where your father and the Elite will be waiting.”

Felix wasted no time and strode to Mor. He was about to grab her hand so they could winnow away, but just before he could Den said one more thing.

“Please bring my baby back to me. His name is Dimitri.”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It wouldn't hurt to reread chapters 12 and 18 when you've finished with this one *wink*


	33. Chapter 33

Felix had been to war many times over. He had raged it in the name of his uncle and father – battles becoming a second home for him. He had embodied his mother, Nesta the Beheader, and his blade always struck true as his family name propelled it.

The smell of war was not unfamiliar and as he stood in front of his Elite in his leathers, an armoury of weapons strapped to him. The Spring Court’s borders had thankfully yet to yield, not that Felix would be anywhere near them as he again approached his dark friend Death.

Today, he would not cower, not show weakness. Rather, he would show this land exactly how he had earned the name Warbringer.

His father was at his side as he addressed the Elite. Their goal? Get ready for the slaughter that will befell Kaden and Eleana when she was finally free. He had given them details on her… condition. And he had debriefed them thoroughly on what they had to do to keep her safe. He had lied about one thing though. It was semi-important.

Felix knew the chances of him staying alive after that bitch-queen perished were slim at best. But if he were to go down, he would do so spewing flames and drinking the blood of his fallen enemies.

He finished his address, they would fly in a few minutes. He caught the eye of his father, and the general came close to whisper to him.

“You stay safe, you understand? This family needs you.”

“Understood.” He smirked at his father, an unwavering confidence. Felix was not stuck in a cursed mountain this time. No. The creatures didn’t stand a chance.

Cassian’s hand was shaking as he affectionally patted Felix’s hair. His next words were quiet, his eyes darting around to make sure nobody heard them. “Is there anything I can say to make you go home? This battle can function without you.”

Felix raised his eyebrows at the earnest words. His father had glassy eyes, and his body was taught. Felix smiled at him. “I’ll see you when this is over.”

He was lying to his father, too.

______

Kaden stood to attention before Felix and with the rest of the Elite. His friend turned away from his father, and Kaden cracked his knuckled in anticipation. Felix nodded at him, and Kaden took to the skies. Today, he would lead them to Eleana’s location.

Just as Kaden had once promised her, he would find her.

He would always find her.

When they were high enough to see for miles around them but not yet touching the clouds, Kaden brought just enough of his magic to the surface to find Eleana. The little golden orbs, only visible to the veilsinger, appeared in a straight line towards the mortal lands. He took head of the Elite, Felix flying next to him and the Elite a tight V-formation behind them.

As they flew, it was hard to ignore the chaos reigning below them.

Kaden had never seen so much fire in his life, and the potent smoke smelt of burnt flesh so strongly it made him gag. As they angled down and flew closer to land, the screams of the humans were so loud it made his ears ring. It was hard not to stop, but the Elite had a job, and fae soldiers would arrive soon.

But still, seeing creatures familiar and not tearing at the human’s delicate flesh made Kaden feel sick, and made him feel like a sinner for not aiding them. Felix reminded him they had a more important job, that they were going to end this war, but it was hard to keep his words in mind as they all observed the carnage. The creatures were feasting, and the armies of Prythian were still on their way.

The further south they went, the less screams there were. The creatures had already been there a good while, and any survivors must have been so well hidden that not even Kaden could sense them.

He didn’t want to acknowledge the more logical reality – that there were no survivors at all.

The golden lights came to a standstill in the centre of a fishing town, the once surely bustling merchant port filled with not busy workers, but half sunken ships. Their masts creaked and groaned as the current tried to claim them wholly for the sea, and the Elite watched as a body impaled on a mast was pecked at by crows, vultures circling above to scavenge but smart enough not to do it while the creatures still roamed. They landed at the pier, the aged timber crackling beneath their feet.

Felix had an impenetrable shield around them as they walked. Kaden heard the Elite falter behind them. He turned his head and had to brace his hand on Felix’s shoulder when he saw what they were looking at.

Creatures were swarming. They could have passed for dogs if they’d had fur, but instead they had pale pink, slimy skin that was so thin you could see their veins. They were hacking at a group of children, that from the looks of their scattered books and the two adults at their head, were on their way home from school when the creatures attacked.  

Kaden locked eyes with a small boy missing an arm and whose gaze lifelessly met his own. Kaden could have summoned the magic to see the Other Side, to maybe help guide the group of human children away from this ghastly place, but he simply didn’t have the time. If they didn’t find Eleana soon, far more children would perish.

The Elite continued on, and Kaden found what was at the end of the trail. It was a pantheon, so big that Kaden was awed by its size. In front of the entrance was a multitude of gargantuan stone columns with a circular building attached with a large dome roof. It was painted bright colours and had gold accents on the columns, and Kaden was jarred by how at odds the lovely building was with the carnage.

Felix silently gestured to where he wanted the Elite to be. They would be surrounding the perimeter of the building while Kaden went inside. They went in groups of five, and when they were in position, Felix came close to him.

“I’m familiar with this architecture,” he hushed. “In the centre of the roof is a hole for the sun. That’s where I’ll be. Give me the signal when Eleana is free.”

Felix stretched his wings to soar away but was stopped by one last question.

“We kill the queen, but what then?”

Felix didn’t answer, but the look on his face was grave before he shot into the air.

And then Kaden was alone, the rest of the Elite undetectable. He walked up through the columns and giant wooden doors, unsure of what to expect inside. His hands had started to sweat, and the metallic smell of blood was so strong he swore he could taste it too.

Walking into the pantheon was like stepping into another world, the door slamming shut behind him. Alters to deities covered every wall, the floor a mosaic tale that told the story of the gods. Every tile was individual glass, and it must have taken decades to complete. The details weren’t easy to make out though, the only light coming from the circular hole in the ceiling.

Kaden’s eyes followed the line of sun the hole made. It went at an angle, and illuminated the person waiting at its end.

Eleana.

Her face was upturned toward the light, her hands crossed in front of her. She wore a black gown that flowed behind her in a train that reminded him of toxic lava spilled from an active volcano. Her sleeves were long, but that didn’t stop her from covering her arms in gold bracelets and twining cuffs. Her hair was out, and straighter than it would have been naturally. Somewhere she had found a grand, gold crown to adorn her head.

After a minute of him inspecting her, she cocked her head to meet his gaze. The smile she gave him was possessive – animalistic. She turned fully towards him but didn’t say a word nor take even a step to approach him.

He took a deep breath; he walked towards her instead. His pace was slow, his heart thundering in his chest.

Looking at her… Cauldron, he missed her. His body filled with such yearning that he nearly tripped making his way to her. His mind and being were completely conflicted. He knew the woman he was looking at was not his Dark Rose, that she was a parasite infecting his love, but that didn’t mean the feelings he got when he looked at her weren’t the same. They were just a horrible, twisted version of what his love should be. Because by the Mother, he hated this queen. He hated her for killing so many and then taking the best thing he’d ever had away from him.

“Hello,” he said.

“Hello,” she purred.

She finally stepped out of the light, the shadows shifting her features completely. Before, she looked like an angel, now she was a demon rising from the depths.

“I knew you’d come to me eventually.”

“Why is that?” he asked.

She laughed softly and continued in his direction. Even her walk was different. She may be inside Eleana, but it truly was nothing but a suit – no better than a mask at a masquerade ball.

She stopped a foot away from him. Her hands raised and rested on his chest, and he let them stay there. He could scent how she was feeling. The queen was not at all surprised or fearful of his presence, in fact, he could tell he was exactly what she wanted to see.

Perhaps Felix’s observations about the queen being attracted to Kaden weren’t far-fetched – her scent certainly conveyed she was.

“I can see why she was so enamoured by you. So golden, like the day to her night. Wholly dependent on one another, but never. Able. To touch.” She tapped her fingers on his chest at the beat of her words, the twisted smile on her face feral.

“You talk confidently for someone who knows nothing about me.”

She sighed. “I’ve been watching you for a year, I’ve been watching her for longer. I know more than you could ever dream.”

She leant in closer, her nose grazing his neck as she smelt him. She pressed her face into his jugular, and Kaden’s breath stopped when he felt her flick her tongue over the vein.

Kaden braced his hands on her forearms, but not to push her away. He brought her closer to him and shifted his head, so she had better access to his throat.

He was right in thinking that the queen would like the action. She pushed her body against his, and a feral purr omitted from her mouth.

Kaden waited. One minute of her exploring. Two. Her hands touching his back, his wings. Three. Four. Her hands, now tipped in small claws, reached down the back of his pants to cup his ass. Five.

And that’s when he assaulted her with every bit of magic he had.

He had been summoning it since the news broke that the mortal lands had been attacked. It was a technique that Azriel had shown him. Over hours, days, even, you slowly pull every bit of magic you have into you. Eleana had told him about it once, said that when she did it, it was like borrowing colour from the sky, like sucking the infinite power into herself and letting it fill her. For Kaden, it was like his power was the sea. Murky, mysterious, drop by drop he stole the water and consumed it until it filled him. And then he just kept stealing.

She tried to rip herself away, her face and body contorting with the pain from him magic. He was trying to sever her soul, but he was also trying to walk the bridge that connected his and Eleana’s minds. She was shrieking at him, but the grip he’d had on her tightened as he also used all his physical strength to keep her against him. He moved one hand to the back of her hair and yanked, so that she was looking directly into his eyes as she screamed. Sweat dripped down his back, and his muscles cramped from the effort of holding all that she was.  

His magic was a glaring golden light around him, and from the way her eyes squinted and watered it was not visible to just him.

Her voice echoed throughout the room, screaming and hissing and snarling, making Kaden’s ears rattle and ring.

He zoned away from the pantheon.

He focused on their minds and pictured the bridge between them. On his side was the Rainbow of Velaris, and across the long bridge there was a black, veined door. It was beating like a heart and dripped back ooze into the river beneath them, dirtying the water.

Kaden yanked himself back with a yelp. It was like he had been hit by lightning. Kaden felt every step in him as though it was frying his nerves. He bit his lip so hard from the pain his lip split and started to bleed down the front of him; he didn’t have time to wonder if it meant he was also bleeding in that pantheon.

Kaden panted as he walked, his magic still growing strong but his morale weakening. Every step was so hard he was convinced he wouldn’t be able to take another. But he could not stop – refused to, because he could already feel what was behind that hellish door, could sense the love he’d missed so much.

As he got closer, the bridge below him became littered with gaping holes. He could not move his wings to fly, and the drop below him was full of jagged rocks and a fall so steep he would plunge to his death with one misstep. But this was his chance, his only chance to get to Eleana. Never again would this wicked thing let him close enough to her to bury himself in her mind.

Finally, he reached the door. It was vibrating with each pulse, and the cliff face surrounding it cracked with each one. The cracks ran for nearly as far as Kaden could see, and the whole thing seemed only moments away from falling down around them. As though Eleana’s mind was imploding.

If that happened, she would die.

So would the queen. Who mustn’t have been strong enough to hold Eleana. Eleana, who wasn’t strong enough to hold herself together.

There would have been those glad to know that ultimately the queen would one day die, and not be an immortal as Eleana were. But Kaden would happily watch the world burn down around him than see those he loved perish. Love had made him a better man, but love had also made him the most selfish male in Prythian.

Kaden had to get through that damned door.

He placed his hands on it, the door feeling like raw, malleable flesh. He pushed his hands in, and they melded around him, the black liquid covering the door spilling down his arms. He pushed forward, until he could grab onto what felt like bone. He shimmied his hands along the smooth surface, until he felt a protrusion that resembled a handle. He tried to twist it but getting it to budge felt near impossible.

Shards of rock fell on him as the cliff continued to crack, and as Kaden looked away from the door to spare his eyes he saw that the bridge was also crumbling, huge chunks falling into the depthless sea.

He could no longer turn back.

Not that he had any intention to.

He pressed further into the door, his body half inside the fleshy entrance. He spat out the black liquid from his mouth and gritted his teeth as he used both hands to turn the handle.

He summoned more magic, gold emulating from his hands so brightly it lit up the door from the inside out.

It was like a body.

Veins, bones, joints, all clear now that Kaden’s hands acted as a torch. He could see clearly now, and he was relieved to find that he was indeed twisting a handle and not some other hard appendage.

His body shuddered as he pulled harder – the door sucking him in as he did so, as though to consume him and add his bones to its collection. He pulled back while still keeping his hands in, and he coughed as some of the door’s – _Cauldron, it’s blood, isn’t_ _it_ – spilled into his mouth and down his throat. It tasted like ash and death but was also so sickly sweet he wanted to vomit. Sweat dripped down his forehead, mixing in his mouth with his own blood and the door’s, but the handle wasn’t moving. He tried harder, but he couldn’t make any hedge way with his body so far pulled back.

The world rumbled around him, and his heart beat like a hummingbird’s wings as he let his body be completely consumed by the flesh.

And as he suffocated in the meat of the door, his lungs compressed and his mouth full of black blood, the handle moved.

And the door opened.

_____

Felix watched overhead as Kaden and Eleana spoke, their words echoing up to him. He also kept an eye on the Elite, who were sneaking around as they quietly executed as many creatures as they could find in the vicinity. Once they were no longer under the queen’s control, they would likely be rampart in the streets, even more violent than before. Felix wanted them gone so that Kaden could get Eleana out quickly, just in case Felix wasn’t there to do it himself.

From the roof of the building, he could see the whole town. The Elite were combing through houses and stores, hoping to find survivors and kill the creatures. They were doing it silently, and Felix nodded his approval to nobody in particular. The creatures were crawling through the street like lice.

Felix looked to the water. On any other day he would have liked the afternoon sun on his face and the salt water smell filling his nostrils, but he was too tense now. His hair ruffled in the wind as he looked out at the gently lapping waves. The sun would set soon, and he hoped he’d be able to watch it.

He wanted to watch his last one.

He was still looking to the sea when his eyes caught on a dark shadow just below the water. It looked like a long tentacle, but bigger than any squid or octopus he’d ever seen. With a stiffness in his chest he would never admit was fear, he stood to get a better look.

Surely she didn’t have creatures in the sea.

He decided to investigate it further but was stopped by the piercing screams of Eleana. He slid to his knees and looked over the edge of the dome’s sky window but was near blinded by a gold light that filled the room and shot through the hole like a raw beam of light. His eyes burned from the sight, and they were watery and stinging as he threw himself onto his back. He put his arm over his closed eyes, but even still he could see the gold. With his eyes shut, he crawled away from the hole and to the edge of the pantheon. He was far enough away now that he felt comfortable opening his eyes, and when he did he was mortified.

The creatures were all looking at it, and as one he saw their limbs tangle in the struggle to get to the light source first.

A beam bright enough to be seen on another continent, and it was attracting every creature that could see it.

“ _Fuck_.”

With a burst of his magic, Felix summoned every member of his Elite to the pantheon. As they came, he positioned them around the gargantuan structure. At all costs, they must defend the doors. The walls should be think enough to maintain that barrier, but if any creature got in, everything would fall apart. Kaden would die, Eleana would never be saved, and Prythian was doomed.

Because as Felix said, he could see everything from atop this pantheon. And that included the thousands of creatures starting to swarm.

He put a protective shield over the sky window and appointed ten members of the Elite to guard it with their lives. The rest of them would take the creatures on the ground, hoping they wouldn’t claw their way up or through the thick marble walls. Felix stood directly in front of the door. Bathed in the shadows of the columns, Felix’s chest rose and fell, his thundering heartbeats in synchronization with the thousands of feet stampeding towards him.

They were getting closer, and he snarled inwardly. Today was round two with these bastards, and this time he planned on winning. He just prayed to the Cauldron that whatever the fuck Kaden was doing in there he was doing quickly.

_____

Kaden was nowhere.

He didn’t know how to describe it, other than where he was, was nothing.

He could say that everything was a black, but even that could not describe the vast indefinite void around him. There were no sounds. There was no light, though he could still see himself.

And Eleana.

She was away from him and standing deathly still. She was completely bare here, and he looked down at himself and noticed that he was too.

But not just had he lost his clothing, but his scars were also gone. His body was immaculately clean, and his hair groomed. He reached his hand behind him to touch his back, and was startled to feel normal, smooth skin. No lashes, no more scars.

Walking to Eleana took six years and six minutes all at once. Every movement wasn’t really a movement, he could see his body moving but he couldn’t really feel it. His feet weren’t touching a floor, no footsteps could be heard, but he was indeed going towards her.

He stopped right in front of her, but her glazed over eyes looked into the distance.

“Eleana,” he said gently, raising one hand to smooth her hair away from her face.

Her eyes moved to meet his. “Hello,” she said.

He smiled at the word, even if she’d said it distractedly. “Would you believe me if I told you that was the second time I’d heard you say that today?”

She sighed and walked forward, straight into him. When their bodies touched, she jumped back in shock, her face twisting at the touch of him.

Kaden raised his hands and stepped back, wanting to show that he was no foe. The last thing he wanted to do was harm her.

But with every step she followed him, poking at his chest with her index finger. “What is going on?” she asked him.

“I’m here to help you take your body back.”

She grabbed him by the shoulders and forced him to be still. She searched his eyes, and whatever she found made her tentatively wrap her arms around him.

Kaden may not have been able to feel himself in this space, but she, Eleana, his Dark Rose, was solid against him.

Her face was pressed into his neck, and he could feel the heaving of her chest as she breathed. “This hasn’t happened before,” she said quietly. “I’ve never been able to feel you before or speak to you.” She settled against him, and he knew what she was feeling was relief, and he found himself the same. He’d made it this far, he could go all the way. And with her at his side, his…

His perfect equal, he knew he could kill this queen. Knew that he would die trying.

One thing about what she’d said had particularly caught his attention.

“Before?”

She cocked her head. “Every other time you’ve been here.” She smiled, her face unmarred by grief or stress. “Come with me, I’ll show you.” She linked their hands and pecked his mouth so feather-light it was as though she was scared he might disappear at any moment. “We can pretend. I’ll show you my favourites.”

She walked away, slowly, so that he was at her side constantly. He followed her willingly, not quite sure what they were doing – or what he was going to do. He needed to separate the souls of Eleana and the queen, but he didn’t even know where to find that bitch. He should be telling Eleana everything she’d missed, but instead he let her lead him through the void.

In the distance, he saw specks of colour. As they got closer her saw what was like a window. He became confused, he knew there was nothing here, but he could also feel that this belonged. The closer he got, the warmer he felt and-

Loved. He felt loved.

Eleana took him to the gap in the void, and he looked out.

He was watching a scene, or _feeling_ it, really. His hair was moving with the wind, and he could smell the familiar scents of Velaris. It was the House of Wind. Cassian was there, and he was showing a war hammer to a young boy, maybe ten. The boy was polishing it and muttering about how he was strong enough to hold the hammer on his own and was unsuccessfully trying to yank it from his father’s hands. Cassian just smiled gently at him. The boy looked forlorn. Embarrassed. His brown cheeks stained red and he tucked his unruly hair behind his ear. Then, the boy looked up and directly at Kaden, grinning as he did so.

“Uncle Az brought baby Laya!”

The boy skipped over to Kaden and yanked on Azriel’s hand, wanting him to release what he was holding. Kaden could feel himself turning his head and looking at the face of Azriel, but when he looked down his body was that if a toddler’s in a pink dress with yellow boots. He looked back at the boy and could feel joy filling him as Kaden was lowered to the ground. Somehow, he was being held by the shadowsinger.

The boy picked Kaden up and walked him over to Cassian, the male warning him to be careful with the baby.

Kaden was confused. Happy, but confused. He looked to the boy again and was struck by the familiarity of his hair and facial structure and realised that he was looking at a very young Felix.

And he, somehow, was Eleana.

He watched her memory play out through her eyes.

From the look of Eleana’s hands, she must have been small, maybe three or four. Cassian and Azriel had been given the task of training her, and if Cassian’s constant jokes were anything to go by, it’s because Rhys couldn’t handle weapons being anywhere near his daughter. But Kaden couldn’t help but internally snicker at Cassian and Azriel attempts to train her.

Cassian had tried to give her a wooden knife, and Eleana, being ever the lady, pulled a squished flower from her pocket, thinking they had to trade. The action made both older Illyrians melt, and Azriel accepted the gift gratefully. Both tried to teach her how to hold the knife properly but were easily distracted by her cuteness – like when she saw a butterfly and dropped the knife and wandered after it.

It was Felix in the end who made progress with her. He, as much as he loved his little cousin, wasn’t as distracted by her actions, nor too enamoured to tell her what to do. Felix went through how to hold it and then how to throw it, while Cassian and Azriel looked on in approval.

Kaden was able to wrench himself from the scene to watch Eleana, who stared blindly into it. Kaden stepped away from her, seeing she was too enveloped by what she surely had seen many times before to speak.

Kaden whipped his head around and saw more windows. He searched through them.

Felix hiding Eleana in her own house to play. Her as a child finding gifts from the forest. Her first fight with her parents, and the subsequent hours of them making it up to her. Her moving to the camp. Her first kiss. Her first time. Setting the records on the flying obstacle courses. Having adventures with Felix. Seeing Kaden for the first time. Watching the soul get sucked from Felix Under the Mountain. Dancing with Kaden for the first time. Being captured and tortured by the Colloden. Squealing with delight every time one of his letters arrived, her beating heart so pure and full of the first kernels of love for him.

Kaden watched her life and smiled.

Until he was no longer smiling.

What he saw was no longer the Eleana he knew.

He saw dark caves with glowing symbols. He saw her feeding off of rats, wandering fae, wandering _children_. He saw her stalking through the Night Court and petrifying its magical residents. He saw her watching him, stalking Eleana, and that’s when he fully comprehended that he was no longer immersed in Eleana’s memories, but the queen’s.

He saw the queen approach a grieving Eleana, begging for her cousin’s ghost to come speak to her. He saw the queen offer Eleana exactly what she wanted, and then Eleana to say that it wasn’t enough. But Kaden could see her temptation, and when the queen promised not to harm a single life that resided in the Night Court, the offer was too good to refuse. The queen took her into the mountains, creatures crawling around them but never approaching, just standing guard. Eleana was taken to a room, where Felix’s groomed body was lying. Eleana rushed to his side and grabbed his body to hers, sobbing at his lifeless corpse. That was when she truly conceded to the queen. While smoothing back Felix’s hair, Eleana let herself be taken.

Kaden felt fury in him, felt himself getting hot, and he knew it wasn’t the queen’s emotions he was feeling. This red-hot anger in him was all his.

“I miss you.”

As the sound of Eleana’s voice, the heat making his vision turn red dissipated.

“I’ve missed you too, more than you could imagine. There’s so much I need to tell you, that I need to apologize for.”

Eleana linked their fingers and brought him out of the memory. “I wish you were here.”

“I am, Eleana. Look at me.” He glided his hands to her jaw, upturning her face to gaze at him. Her violet eyes were still hazy, not the focused ones he loved, and he needed her at full attention. He had let himself get lost in her mind, when he should have been using this time to find the queen and expel her.

And Kaden just prayed there was enough of Eleana left to salvage to have her be herself again.

“I didn’t summon you to say goodbye to Felix, and because of that I lost you. If it hadn’t been so selfish with him, none of this would’ve happened.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead, one she melted into. “But I can’t fault you for your actions. This would have happened either way, my love, and you brought Felix back to us and kept our home safe.”

The clarity started to return to her, making her look at him in concern.

“No…” she said slowly. “What I did was a truly wicked thing. I have killed thousands. You – you would never forgive me for that. You’re too good.”

“I think you’d be surprised with how wicked I could be if it was for you.”

She blinked slowly. “You’ve never said those words to me before.”

“I should have.”

“I can’t-” she choked on her own words. “I know where I am. I see what she does. I can’t imagine anymore, nor daydream. You’ve never said that to me before.”

Her eyes, now fully aware, searched his. “I made sure that my mind was locked so that no one could be trapped in here with me, and that was before all of this happened. Afterwards, once she was here, I had no control left.”

She ran her hands up his chest, her eyebrows furrowing in confusion when the familiar scars were nowhere to be seen. She spun him, and gasped when she saw his clear back.

“So, the only logical explanation for how you are here, looking like this and saying such things, is because you’re really here,” she said slowly, as if she couldn’t possibly believe it.

He smirked . “Hello, Eleana.”

_____

Felix swung his sword and buried it in the belly of a creature twice his height, its entrails spiling on the already bloody ground as it was gutted. His hair was stuck to his head – blood coating it so thoroughly it was slicked back and matted down. He was back to back with one of his soldiers, the rest scattered around the pantheon.

Bodies lay around him like sand on the beach. He could not count how many he had killed, and he knew it would be a long while before numbers could be confirmed. He did not want to look too closely, for if he did, he would not just see the slain carcasses of the beasts, but one glance and he knew some of his Elite would be there too.

And that wasn’t something he could linger on right now.

There was no time to dwell on his most recent kill as he slashed at the creatures around him. He was favouring his sword, but every now and then he’d shout for his Elite to take flight, so he could blast them with his unending flame and killing power.

They were making good ground, and although the walls had been breached the roof hadn’t. The powerful golden beam had also dimmed to a simmer – a glow that filled the room and was blinding to look at but didn’t pierce the sky like before. Felix was worried though, there were less than fifty soldiers fighting an army of Cauldron knew how many, and they just kept coming and coming.

“ _Up!”_ he shouted in command, and all his soldiers rose so he could incinerate everything that was around them. His fire was hot enough to melt stone, so he had to be careful not to touch it with his deadly magic. The creatures around him were burned to dust, and a purposeful flap of his wings had it dispersing away from him and the Elite and into the eyes of anything still approaching.

“We can’t do this forever,” one of his men yelled. “What else can be done?”

Felix had expected the question, though not this soon. To say he was disappointed one of his own had lasted for so little was an understatement.

“We fight harder, because it is our duty.”

So, that it what they did. Felix snarled while he demolished the enemies around him, revelling in his revenge. He just hoped Kaden would hurry the fuck up.

The sun was starting to set, and Felix had no choice but to strategically set homes alight so that there was as much light as possible. Between the crackling of the flames and the sounds of war around him, everything else was a distant blur in his mind. That was until he heard wings in the distance.

With a roar of glory, he shot into the air to welcome the soldiers who had finally come.

And at their head, clad in the colours of the Night Court, was his father.

The General raised his sword and roared in return and shot in front of his squadrons. Felix yelled for his Elite to retreat and join their ranks as Cassian came to his side.

Together, they met at the centre of the pantheons ceiling. No words were exchanged, no gestures, just a proud glint in Cassian’s eyes as they rose together, and then dropped with every ounce of killing power they had – unleashing their own hell.

_____

“You shouldn’t be here.”

“We need to expel the queen from you.”

“It’s impossible. I can feel her like she _is_ me. I’m doing my best to stop her, and you need to leave lest I hurt you too.”

“You can’t hurt me, Eleana, and I need your help. Where is she? In here, where can I find her soul?”

He placed his hand over her heart and could feel it fluttering beneath his palm.

She placed her hand over his, her forehead creased but fingers steady.

“Whatever of her is in here, it’s this way.”

Eleana walked away at a brisk pace, Kaden following her immediately. He tried to use his magic to track the queen’s soul, but either it didn’t work like that in the vats of Eleana’s mind or his magic was too preoccupied with just keeping him here in the first place. It was holding steady, but the vision of what he’d seen behind that door was still very much fresh in his mind. He may be able to stay here for a good while longer, but there was also a good chance that Eleana wouldn’t last that long.

Is that what Eleana meant when she said she was doing her best to stop the queen? Her consciousness crashing around her, was it the queen’s inability to hold something so strong, or was it Eleana purposefully rejecting her? Both?

Either way, they couldn’t be here much longer, and Kaden would be damned before he let them fall again.

It was disorienting, walking through nothing. It felt like he wasn’t actually going anywhere, even if he could feel his legs and arms moving. Eventually, Eleana halted to a standstill, lifting her arm to point in front of her.

He could see the queen from here – her humanoid body. She was taller than even he, with claws the length of a sword and teeth like knives. Her eyes were a burning gold, and with every step closer to her Kaden could hear her inhuman screeching. She was flailing around, her body contorting as she rose and sunk.

Her slitted nostrils flared as he approached, and her voice – not sweet, but rougher than gravel – barked at him.

“Stop this,” she snapped.

“In a perfect world I would give you a slow, painful death for all that you have done.”

“You kill me and she’s dead.” The queen’s accompanying laugh was deranged.

“I would never do anything to hurt her.”

“But I will; if I go down I’m taking her with me. Are you so willing to risk her life? Not very gentlemanly of you.”

Eleana tapped Kaden on the shoulder, bringing his attention to her. “May I speak with you?”

He nodded, and they stepped far enough away from the thrashing queen that she couldn’t hear them.

She linked their hands between them and smiled sadly. “Kaden, I’ve made peace with what I’ve done. I deserve my fate.”

“I don’t understand.”

She brought their hands to her lips and kissed his knuckles. “This last year with you has been the most amazing of my life – even with everything that happened. I would do it all again in a heartbeat to be with you.”

“I love you, too. I just wish I hadn’t wasted so much time.”

She closed her eyes. “Time, _time_. We don’t have much longer. Kaden, you need to do whatever you can to stop her. I know what she has in store for our world and others, and even if you separate us she will find another host to infect.”

“I have no plans to let her live past this day. I will eradicate every essence of her from you and from this land.”

“Kaden, you don’t understand…”

“What don’t I understand?”

“We’re too closely linked. You can’t – You need to kill me too.”

He blanched away from her, ripping his hands free of her grip and placing them gently either side of her face.

“Never.”

“You must.”

“I couldn’t even if I wanted to.” As inappropriate as it might have been in that moment, he inched forward, gently pressing his lips to hers. He did so again, this time lingering.

“We don’t have time to debate this,” she whispered against him, pressing her mouth to his cheek.  

He wrapped his arms around her, letting them have this moment of peace before he did what he needed to do.

“I can’t fathom hurting you. My magic repulses at the thought.”

“I won’t hold it against you. Felix will still love you; whether I’m here or not you have a family, you’ll be safe. Please, Kaden, I’m begging you to end this.” A tear slipped down her face.

“We both know it’s not possible for me to kill you.”

“Kaden-”

“Eleana.” He laughed lightly. “We both know that it is impossible to harm your mate, and I have no intention of trying to defy our bond.” His own, undeniable truth.

It was her turn to blanch away, and her tears came more freely. Her face crumpled, and she pushed herself away so that she could look him fully in the eyes.

“You know?”

“Since before the Bloodrite. But I never needed the bond to love you. If we were mates or not, you would still be the one I yearn for in my immortal years, the one who encompasses my dreams. We would have found a way together in every reality possible, even if it was the whole world that separated us.”

She threw herself at him and he held her so close he lifted her from the ground.

“I’ve known since the day we met. I wanted to tell you, but there was just so much going on. I didn’t want to force it on you.”

He turned serious, lowering her but keeping her close. “Thank you – for not telling me. It’s better that I came to the conclusion myself.”

There was more he wanted to say on the matter, but maybe best said after a drink or eight when Felix was there to wipe the slobber from his mouth and tuck him into bed.

“There’s more we need to discuss,” he told her, “and by the Cauldron all I want to do is hear your voice again, but there’s something I need to do.”

She nodded faintly, kissing him once again.

Kaden wondered how long he’d been in here – it felt like days, weeks even, but realistically he knew that wasn’t possible. Surely, they both would have been killed by now if it was. And the way Eleana was kissing him, like her final breaths were to taste like him, he wondered how long it’d felt like she’d been here.

“ _Go_ ,” she breathed.

“We’ll have everything this world has to offer and more. I swear it to you.”

He watched her step back, her feet mirroring his own. It was at the last second that he let his eyes fall on the savage queen. She was still in obvious pain, her body twisting in abnormal ways in an effort to be under control. She had finally come to see him for what he was – a worthy adversary – and if he still had his fae senses in the darkest corners of Eleana’s mind he was sure he would smell her fear.

He didn’t speak straight away. He flexed his magic, trying to wrangle it in this foreign environment. He could feel it outside of himself – outside of _here_ – still holding her in his grip. His biggest challenge would be bringing it to this place and eviscerating what was in front of him, the soul that had ravished this land. He knew she had a physical body somewhere, the copy of what he saw now, but that didn’t matter if her soul was never able to connect to it.

He reflected on what he had done for Thea. It was so long ago, and the night had been so taxing that in his deep sleep afterwards he forgotten exactly what had transpired.

With the scattered remnants of his memory, he approached the queen a final time, stopping so closely that her foot-long tongue could have easily licked him. He was not afraid of her gaping mouth nor her teeth. She had as little power here as he did.

And she was lacking something that he wasn’t.

Vengeance.

Revenge.

An anger so primal he knew it had been building since the first time a hand a been laid on him; since the family that had never loved him rejected him so thoroughly, made him feel so inferior that he hadn’t recognized the eyes of his mate even as she’d kissed him; since the first time a woman had demanded sex from him like he was a whore, like a slave; since he finally found a brother only to have it ripped away from him like their lives meant nothing.

As solid as the scars marring his back, his resolve would always be stronger, be hungrier. Kaden had fallen, over and over and over again, and he wasn’t too proud to admit he needed love and support from those around him to get back up again.

Today he would be as blood thirsty as his brothers. Today he would be as strong as his mother. He would be as ruthless as Azriel, as skilful as Felix, as fierce as Morrigan, and as overwhelmingly powerful as his mate. His Eleana.

“I have never been so happy to end a life. Pity I’m wasting such joy on you.”

And then he wrapped his hands around her throat.

_____

 _It has to be over soon_ , Felix thought. With his father’s reinforcements they were keeping the creatures at bay while also attending to injuries. But they would soon have to scatter. The creatures here were only a small portion of what the queen had unleashed on the mortal realm. And, by all reports, on the ships she’d sent to other continents. There were Illyrians and Peregrines sinking such ships now and holding their treasonous fae captains as prisoners.

“Can we move them?” His father landed at his side, running his hand through his sweat-slicked hair and wiping the blood on his sword to his pants, a useless motion when it’d get bloody in the next minute.

“We’d be blinded by Kaden’s light before we could even get to his side. Best to keep them where they’re safe.”

“Thea didn’t take this long.”

“Thea’s soul was different. Mother knows what the hell is happening in there right now. I’d bet my money that it’s painful though, if those gods-awful fucking shrieks are anything to go by.” Felix laughed it off, but a small amount of him was concerned. Night had well and truly fallen, and nothing had changed since that beam dimming. The pantheon was still filled with Kaden’s light, but the male himself wasn’t making any noise.

“There’s also the small matter to discuss of what we’re to do for your birthday.”

Felix raised a brow to his father. “I’m not sure this is the best time to discuss such things. Besides, Eleana wants to do something conjoined this year.”

“I did something shameful.”

That was _not_ what Felix expected to hear. “What might that be. Oh, and duck.”

His father did as asked and Felix threw a knife straight and true between the eyes of a creature. He waited for it to die before addressing his father again.

“When you died,” his voice was strangled on the word, “I’d already had everything organised. Then I threw my presents for you into the Sidra.”

Felix spat out in laughter. “What on earth made you do that?”

His father’s eyes were haunted when he answered. “Would you believe if I said it was a bad habit of mine?”

Felix snickered again. “Let’s have breakfast. Just us. And then we can get Mother and the girls and treat them to a day. I think they deserve it, and Quathryn has never had her nails painted before. I would very much like to see the look on her face if they were.”

“Easy done. Move to the left, would you?” Not a second later his father charged forward in that direction, skewering the creatures that had crept up and tried to bite off Felix’s ankles.

“Nicely done,” Felix complimented.

“I saw you do it before.” His father ruffled his hair, something he was prone to do. “Let’s get back into the fray, shall we? And this birthday talk isn’t over, I want something grander for my favourite son.”

His father went back into the melee, Felix shouting after him, “I’m your only son!” His words were comical, but the comfort settling in his heart from his father’s warm words were no joke.

Felix sighed, and prayed Kaden and Eleana would be free soon.

The endless violence started again. Felix cut down his enemies as efficiently as he had when he was still at full energy. He had to be careful with his magic. So many soldiers had joined them that the bursts that had worked before would now do more harm than good.

He was thinking of a way he might be able to round up creatures and kill them more effectively when he felt the ground beneath his feet shaking. It wasn’t just a small tremor, but so much that he fell to his knees before flapping into the air to escape it. He looked down, and small cracks had started to form in the ground, that grew to gaping holes. He saw creatures and Illyrians fall, the latter zooming up and avoiding injury while the former screeched and splattered far below. Foot soldiers were picked up by those with wings who took them to where the ground was firmer. Houses caved in, buildings rumbled and dropped, and Felix looked on in horror as not everyone was able to escape it.

But worse, so much worse, was the structure he’d been guarding all this time.

The pantheon was still standing, but all the lines in the ground emanated from it. Its mighty walls shook but held, but he could see small portions of the roof coming loose, soon to descend upon everyone below them.

Which included Eleana and Kaden.

His eyes widened and before thinking he threw a shield around the building, coating every surface with his magic in an effort to keep it together. But the inside was not under his protection, and he couldn’t go in with Kaden still blasting his light like that. Even with his eyes shut, a blindfold on, his eyes would be seared.

But if he didn’t go in and the ceiling concaved, they could very well die under all that weight.

So, there wasn’t really a choice at all. He flew to the top of the building to the circular hole at the top. He took a deep, steadying breath. He counted to three. He tried to form a shield without entering, but he could hear the echoing of concrete as it continued to smash against the ground.

Felix looked to the stars and then to the sea. He ignored the chaos around him and focused on those sights.

And then he jumped in.

_____

Touching her was like an explosive going off. His magic imploded into him and then ruptured out, exposing the queen to him completely. Her form changed from its ghoulish physical mirror to a representation of her soul. Unlike Thea, who was pure and shining, the queen was like the black sludge that had bled all over him at the door. But she was not a solid form, rather trillions of drops of the substance, all that held certain aspects of her being. The golden lights that usually guided him blinked out into a grey wisp, similar to the colour that overcame the world when Kaden looked to the Other Side. But not all the drops were that black, some were blue and gold and red – the parts of Eleana that the queen had made inexplicably herself.

Harming just one of the drops of Eleana’s soul could kill or irrevocably change her.

But Kaden trusted himself. He might not have before but knowing all that he did now he was confident in his abilities.

He let his magic tendril around the fragments of their souls. It hooked over the queens and ushered Eleana’s to the side gently. It started to wink out the sludge. Every action brought a new, excruciating sound from the queen.

“Stop, _stop_ please, _please_ ,” she begged.

He did no such thing. He continued until the air around him started to clear, until there was so little of her left that she had finally gone silent after Mother knows how long of agonizing screams – until he could count how many were left. The last few were the hardest – more difficult even than opening that damn door. But the rush of his magic made him high, made him feel invincible. When there was only a dozen left, the ones that made up her crucial life-blood and were more than just memories or skills, he reached out with his hand to crush them between his thumb and forefinger. Each one erupted in smoke until there was nothing left.

All that, and it was over.

He turned to Eleana.

Before he could speak, he was dragged away.

It was like a vice-grip on his ankles. It heaved him back through Eleana’s mind. Her memories first, reliving each one as if he was her. Then, it sucked him upwards, his hands becoming sheer. He tried to bring them back to normalcy, but before he could succeed he crashed through the fleshy-door, the barricade smashing around him in blood-rain and lethal scraps of bone and cartilage. There was no bridge to cross, so he fell fell fell until his body slammed into the dark water. He missed the jagged rock and kept going down, no oxygen entering his lungs. The plunge made him loose light, loose his senses, and he may as well have been in that void again.

Then, with an earth-shattering slam, his body collided with a solid force. He could feel it like it was a wall, his movements slow from the water restricting him. He banged his fists against it, trying to break through.

When he did, he was on his back staring at a cracked ceiling and dust covered floor.

On his right was Eleana, who’s eyes were barely open as she gasped for air. He reached out his hand for hers, not quite believing where he was. It wasn’t until he felt the warmth and solidness of her hand in his that he coughed a laugh.

They had made it – truly made it.

He looked to the left and the temporary happiness that filled his body drained.

“Felix?”

 

 


End file.
